JustPearlyThings - May 29, 2023


Boss Babe Finally Sees the Light


Episode Stats


Length

10 minutes

Words per minute

187.48265

Word count

2,026

Sentence count

1

Harmful content

Misogyny

3

sentences flagged

Hate speech

2

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, we discuss the benefits of being a stay-at-home wife vs. being a working wife. Is it possible to be a stay at home wife on a more normal wage? What does it mean to work from home and what would you do if your husband asked you to go back to work?

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 could you guys respect a man that you make more money than starting here and
00:00:08.220 then go around and just just just okay and just to give a little preface that
00:00:16.680 means if he says quit quit your job tomorrow I have a plan that you'd
00:00:21.160 go ahead I wouldn't respect a man that I make more money than but if I had a man
00:00:32.500 that makes more money than me and is you know well put together I can see that I
00:00:40.060 can trust his judgment and I know that you know he's got good morals he's he's
00:00:45.580 got good faith yes if he says stop working that's what I want I want to sit
00:00:50.560 at home I want to paint my toes I want to look cute I want to you know drive a
00:00:55.080 nice car and have maids and all of that and if he's going to provide that for me
00:01:00.880 and all I've got to do is pop a couple of utes out sit at home why not I don't
00:01:09.420 think that's the typical stay-at-home mom's experience
00:01:12.360 are you a stay-at-home mom yeah I am I am now is that what your life is like
00:01:20.520 no no I'm talking about you know the the dream that I dream yeah the ideal um but
00:01:30.840 if you're talking about a stay you could still be a stay-at-home wife on a more
00:01:35.180 normal salary it just means cutting off like going down if he can if he can pay
00:01:39.900 our rent and put food on the table and do everything that you know I would be
00:01:45.580 working to provide half of absolutely fine I can do without the maid I can do 0.97
00:01:50.640 without you know all of that let me just focus on our home you bring the money in
00:01:56.580 and I'll make our home a home and that way I will be more happier because to be
00:02:00.640 honest you know I am a working woman and I've got a child it's stressful you know
00:02:06.120 that morning rush to get that little four-year-old ready and she don't 1.00
00:02:10.060 understand why I'm rushing and she's you know money money money and I've got a 0.99
00:02:14.040 rush her get her in the car drop her off I've done a whole shift before I've gone
00:02:17.840 to work and then I've got to deal with people that I work with and then you know
00:02:22.580 hard stop five o'clock I need to stop this meeting I need to rush out so you know to
00:02:26.780 my colleagues you know I might look like you know oh don't put any meetings in
00:02:30.800 her diary after five o'clock because you know she's a single mom and there's that
00:02:34.100 stigma that you've got to deal with so the short answer yeah
00:02:37.280 um I think I could I think in reality that I would have to I don't think it would be easy
00:02:48.540 to but I would work at it because I don't like especially with the way it is to live
00:02:55.440 now I would not leave an opportunity to make more money um because my man doesn't but I will
00:03:04.980 always strive to respect him um and leave him to do the providing so essentially if I bought more
00:03:14.100 money into the house that's just more spending money in my opinion I would allow him like I would
00:03:20.860 leave him to his role basically yeah let me ask you this what is it like being a stay-at-home mom
00:03:26.060 well do you know what it's it's fine it's good because to me I like raising my children
00:03:37.080 is my priority and looking after my home is my priority everything else is extra
00:03:43.840 but as long as I can give myself the space to do the extra I'm I'm happier that way if my whole life
00:03:54.960 was just at home with the kids and maintaining my house I don't know how happy I would be
00:04:01.460 only because I had a lifestyle before getting married that I had I liked and so I think here
00:04:08.420 I have the best of both worlds but I think and actually I'm confused are you not a stay-at-home mom
00:04:14.860 I just I am a stay-at-home mom but I I I do bits on the side so okay I yeah so um I'm I'm a stepmom
00:04:22.600 coach yeah but my house doesn't depend on the money I make all the money I make it's fun money so you
00:04:28.420 work from home yes I'm I'm yeah I'm always at home yeah unless I come out to to do a speaking gig or
00:04:36.040 something like that yeah okay so yeah I would strive to respect but he will always be the provider
00:04:42.060 and I'm okay with that whatever that looks like okay and just like you said also to her you know
00:04:48.340 how you were saying um you can have a man on like a normal wage and still be a stay-at-home mom he
00:04:55.220 doesn't have to be earning thousands that is very true like I essentially what we say in our culture
00:05:01.160 is cut your coat according to your size whatever my husband makes our life I will maintain our life
00:05:07.320 according to what he makes and as long as our necessities are are met there's really
00:05:12.140 there shouldn't be a complaint I like you yeah thank you like you too um okay so could you respect
00:05:22.080 a man that you make more than yes the answer is yes however I want to see him being ambitious he has
00:05:30.720 to have a plan he has to be someone that gets up no no no that's not that that's not the guy you're
00:05:34.800 dating no no that's like that's like the women trying to change men no he's he's making let's say
00:05:42.240 what's whatever the average salary is here 35 000 pounds a year he will always he will always be
00:05:47.900 making 35 000 a year okay this isn't build a man but what kind of person is he the kind of guy that
00:05:53.120 wakes up and plays video games and just he goes to work okay and makes 35 000 a year okay comes
00:06:00.540 home sometimes he plays video games sometimes he doesn't the same way you know it's like they
00:06:05.500 we can complain about the video games but how many girls are on social media for hours 1.00
00:06:09.920 we're just as bad no you know what you're right I think I could because I've been in that situation
00:06:17.360 and I've been very happy with that okay why aren't you with him he's in Australia oh so this was
00:06:26.300 recent yeah okay I don't know what he makes it's none of my business but I know he's not like the
00:06:31.840 richest guy in the world but he's lovely and he actually made me feel safe in every way so how do
00:06:36.800 you know that you earn more than him I don't but if I did I'd be okay with it because he was that
00:06:41.520 wonderful okay okay so yeah sounds like you need to go back to Australia finish your healing
00:06:49.680 get your man well uh that was the plan not for him though but I would like to see him again 100%
00:06:56.700 oh do you think you're healed enough though um wait I'm confused so when was the okay so wasn't
00:07:03.780 the the old guy eight months ago yeah that was in June okay and then when did the the Australia guy
00:07:09.800 come in literally this month oh oh and he left to Australia no I was in Australia she went away to
00:07:16.940 Australia for six weeks see this is why when men it's like everything the guys say so this is why
00:07:23.080 when guys say like you're healing they just think you're I mean they don't have that yeah you're just
00:07:28.240 sleeping with other dudes um no because it wasn't quite like that it took me a long time to even go
00:07:34.800 on a date with someone like it wasn't until I went to Australia I even considered that I was just
00:07:40.260 completely right but you told me you were healing earlier in Australia yeah and now you're telling me
00:07:45.960 you met the guy in Australia it's no it's no hate to you I'm just no it's fine I'm just observing
00:07:50.100 he's a healer that if I'm honest because I said that to him because he was going through his own
00:07:56.400 thing which I won't discuss on here that's his business and I was going through mine and I said
00:08:02.380 to him for whatever reason I walked into your life and you walked into mine because it was an accident
00:08:06.300 you know I was walking down the street oh you met him on the street what happened was I just come
00:08:10.740 back from the gym I was in a bad mood I smell I was covered in sweat I was spotty I was like
00:08:16.180 you know on my period so I was like bloated and I did not look appealing at all and this stunning man
00:08:21.520 walks towards me and when I fancy someone I get shy and I just look down and he starts talking to me
00:08:28.480 and I'm just like in my head I'm like why today why today and then he's like you should smile you
00:08:33.820 know it looks good on you and then we were just talking and um I felt really good around this person
00:08:43.600 he made me feel safe there's something about his energy that just made me feel really good
00:08:47.940 so you were able to trust him it was more I know that sounds wild because even I look back and I think
00:08:56.300 how did I do that to an extent yeah because I said to him what are you doing later let's go out
00:09:01.040 it was me that initiated it and then when he went in to kiss me he said he asked my permission he's
00:09:06.900 this is after the date he said can I kiss you you know he was asking my permission he was respectful
00:09:11.920 of my boundaries he was you know but you know how you said that you were going through your stuff and
00:09:16.340 he was going through his stuff you said that about your ex the one who was obviously dealing with
00:09:21.200 anorexia you said um he his traumas and your traumas like were able to go together and now you're
00:09:27.400 saying basically the same thing with this guy yeah yeah it's because I'm aware I'm not a perfect
00:09:32.880 person but don't you think that you said you're you're healing right yeah if you're healing and
00:09:37.800 then you're now meeting this guy and you're acknowledging the fact that you're going through
00:09:41.600 your ish he's going through his ish and we've meshed together you're acknowledging the fact that
00:09:46.340 you're entering the same pattern again yeah just because the guy is you know but it's always when
00:09:51.100 you're not looking for someone they just pop up and then you click I can't explain it but
00:09:54.800 they're not denying what you're saying though you're right but don't don't you think you should
00:09:58.060 just not that you should but I guess what I'm saying is if you want to heal to have a fruitful
00:10:06.160 relationship that's not going to be toxic that's not going to have any of the repeated patterns
00:10:11.040 just have that discipline in yourself and be like actually you know what I do really like you as a
00:10:15.900 person but let me get to a place where I know that I'm strong with in who I am I'm not dealing with
00:10:21.800 the same whatever from the last person and bringing that into the new person because all that's going
00:10:26.980 to happen is yeah you're going to be in the same predicament yeah it's just going to be a different
00:10:30.720 story I wouldn't say it's a personal thing on me I'm definitely strong in who I am but you're right
00:10:35.640 I'm definitely not over what happened and I'm I appreciate what you said thank you I just think
00:10:40.780 Any professional healers artificial healing
00:10:43.120 yeah
00:10:43.680 you
00:10:44.100 yeah
00:10:45.180 yeah
00:10:46.000 yeah
00:10:46.280 yeah
00:10:46.900 yeah
00:10:46.920 yeah
00:10:47.220 yeah