JustPearlyThings - May 29, 2023


Boss Babe Regrets Feminism

Hosted by
Hannah Pearl Davis
She Called DRAKE a Beta and GETS REKT Modern Women Hate To Hear The TRUTH

Episode Stats


Length

9 minutes

Words per minute

176.59

Word count

1,598

Sentence count

—

Harmful content

Misogyny

5

sentences flagged

Hate speech

1

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, we talk about modern relationships, what it's like being in a modern relationship and what it was like growing up in a traditional relationship. We also talk about what it means to be a modern woman and how to navigate modern relationships.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.000 can can modern relationships work so my question is for do you for the single
00:00:09.460 people have you ever been in a traditional relationship or and people
00:00:13.220 in a relation sorry for the people in a relationship are you in a traditional
00:00:16.980 relationship and for the single people have you ever been in a traditional
00:00:20.120 relationship and how did you like it well what do you mean by traditional um
00:00:25.620 just like what you think of when you think of like like the man's pays for
00:00:29.040 everything he he leads you follow like that sort of thing okay do you want me to answer that um
00:00:36.060 yes well yeah why don't we start here and then go around go ahead sorry um
00:00:41.620 i i guess yes in some aspects like he would lead and i would follow um he paid
00:00:51.820 yeah he paid for everything unless like i offered and said oh i've got it this time
00:00:57.080 um that's i guess as traditional because we didn't live together and honestly
00:01:02.080 we weren't married so okay okay what about you i don't think i have been in a traditional
00:01:08.260 relationship as such like it was all very 50 50 he didn't really lead much so yeah i don't think i
00:01:16.240 have no okay no never been in a traditional relationship no okay um yes so i'm married
00:01:26.020 and um i hesitate because we have a blended family so it's not traditional in a sense of
00:01:33.000 like nuclear uh we got together and had babies um but we had children before we got together and
00:01:40.040 got married and now we're a blended family but um in a sense of like roles um yes i am i am a
00:01:48.560 traditional wire and yeah i follow his lead and yeah essentially he leads the family
00:01:56.040 um i've been married before so i'm divorced but i wasn't in a traditional marriage or relationship
00:02:06.340 what made it not traditional um i guess i was in my masculine energy and i i was doing everything
00:02:21.160 essentially and he was um not really the man that i i want um that i now want you know after some
00:02:31.760 searching and understanding what my role is as a woman what i would ideally like from a man
00:02:36.860 and what they want from women more importantly um so yeah that's what when you say in your
00:02:43.920 masculine what do you mean by that um so i made the decisions for the family oh okay um financially
00:02:50.860 and more um just everything really i just kind of felt like
00:02:56.760 uh i mean i don't want to be too disrespectful here because you know he's the father of my kid
00:03:02.360 and um there's certain boundaries that you don't talk about on air but i i was in my masculine energy
00:03:09.680 okay okay go ahead um i think to an extent my relationship was quite traditional but i think
00:03:18.640 when it comes to like personality and stuff i think i was more the domineering character compared to him
00:03:23.820 so i would say in that sense i kind of witnessed that i was more the leader than he was and i think
00:03:29.800 that's probably why like things didn't really work out between us but yeah
00:03:33.140 auntie i think um the relationship i'm in now yeah he leads but i think previous relationship i've
00:03:43.140 tried to make them lead and they haven't been able to so i just had to go
00:03:46.260 you just forcing them to lead because some men just don't want to lead some men just don't know
00:03:52.600 how to lead or they can't yeah the one that i've got now he can he does so for the girls that said
00:03:59.640 because i think you two said you've never been in a traditional relationship do you guys enjoy did
00:04:04.600 you enjoy being in a more modern relationship do you want to answer that first definitely not no
00:04:12.160 i'm very i'm quite old school even though i'm young like i've got quite old soul and i've always
00:04:17.760 wanted you know just to be one man for my whole life and it just wasn't that he wasn't giving me
00:04:23.620 that he wasn't really at the beginning he was putting in a lot of effort but towards the end
00:04:27.940 it wasn't really there and that's why i probably ended what was what was the question again
00:04:34.260 what was it like being in a modern relationship did you enjoy it
00:04:39.680 um and is that something you'd want in the future sorry i think these questions it's such a broad
00:04:45.640 question elements of it i enjoyed however i don't know i feel like um so my biggest fear
00:04:54.660 my biggest fear is financially depending on somebody
00:04:58.320 it's my it terrifies me i never ever ever want to co-own a home with someone
00:05:04.960 i never want to co-own a business with someone i never want to be financially tied to a man
00:05:09.940 because i've seen so many women in my life be absolutely dictated financially by men there's 0.83
00:05:14.860 no hate on men men are wonderful i know some amazing men but no one's ever made me feel safe
00:05:20.760 enough to embrace my feminine side with a man which is why i've always had my own businesses
00:05:27.800 i have my own car getting a bit emotional yeah i can hear it yeah
00:05:33.900 i went through something really wild recently
00:05:38.720 my ex committed identity theft fraud against me with his mom
00:05:43.620 that's what my ep is about i'm not even using that as an excuse to plug myself i'm just being
00:05:49.280 transparent because it justifies i don't trust anyone to take care of me i got this
00:05:56.560 and until i meet someone that makes me feel safe enough emotionally spiritually and physically
00:06:02.140 then i will consider being in a traditional relationship
00:06:06.820 oh i'm good i'm not even crying thank you thank you though thanks um do you think that's going
00:06:17.780 to be hard for the for the next guy yeah because it's like he kind of has to deal with the mistakes
00:06:22.700 of like your past in a way yeah you know it already has been hard for the next guy and the
00:06:28.720 guy after that and the guy after that not that not that i'm you know moving about in different ways
00:06:33.680 but you know i go out a lot i have a very social job like i perform for a living i sing
00:06:39.200 so i meet a lot of people and i've met some wonderful people but there's something within me
00:06:44.740 that's just like but can i trust you have i known you long enough because the guy that was
00:06:48.640 with last time was one of my best friends and i knew him for a couple of years before i was with
00:06:54.120 him and then to do that and other things which i can't discuss i'm like well who can i trust
00:06:59.480 so can i ask a question do you at what point do you think you need to do some healing i you know
00:07:08.320 the sad and i don't mean that disrespectfully i hope you no i don't take it disrespectfully the bad
00:07:13.580 the sad thing is i've already done so much healing with all due respect it doesn't sound
00:07:18.460 like it i know i know what healing have you done do you know i ran to the other side of the world
00:07:25.220 i just got back from australia i spent six weeks traveling around australia and this is because
00:07:30.200 when i broke up with him after i found out about the fraud other women from his past were coming 1.00
00:07:35.300 forward to me messaging me and these are women that he smear campaign saying that one's uh used to 1.00
00:07:42.540 beat me up she was a drug addict she was an alcoholic so i blocked them all thinking it was 1.00
00:07:46.460 true and out of curiosity i unblocked them because i knew they were trying to reach out to me
00:07:50.640 and one by one they slowly came forward to me with their screenshots and their truths and their
00:07:55.260 lovely educated women and it frightened me because i was sharing a bed with this person you know i was
00:08:01.800 living with him i was running a business from his home and all of a sudden i'm discovering all of
00:08:07.400 these things i i had no idea he was capable of and they're such nice women they're my friends now
00:08:11.880 they help me you're friends with his ex i'm friends with them yeah a couple of them but like
00:08:17.680 how do you heal if you're friends with his past i would say that's because they justify i understand
00:08:22.880 i think you're right however they justified everything i went through was real because
00:08:26.860 you go through this thing called cognitive dissonance when you're trying to break a trauma
00:08:30.080 bomb with someone and it's where you try and justify their behavior but they were really nice
00:08:34.740 they were so good to me they validated my feelings but simultaneously they're emotionally abusing
00:08:40.100 you by doing other things isolating you i think that's what we do as women though we come together 0.98
00:08:45.680 and then we talk about you know he done this she done that yeah of course and then there's no actual
00:08:50.060 healing that's being done yeah so whether it's spiritually whether it's mentally you know talking
00:08:54.660 to a therapist talking to someone that you trust getting it out and then it won't be so hard on the
00:09:00.860 next guy that comes along and it won't be hard on you
00:09:02.920 you
00:09:02.940 you