JustPearlyThings - June 22, 2023


Divorced man DEBUNKS '＂NOT ALL WOMEN'


Episode Stats


Length

9 minutes

Words per minute

137.05919

Word count

1,245

Sentence count

146

Harmful content

Misogyny

4

sentences flagged

Hate speech

3

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

James Jones has not seen his son in 7 years and is fighting a long battle to get him back. In this episode, he talks about how he and his ex-wife met, how they met and how they ended up together.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 here in the UK. As you guys already know, if you watch the channel, there are millions of
00:00:04.760 fathers every year that are estranged from their children due to the court system not giving men
00:00:11.460 a fair shot in court. So during this series, I've offered that people can reach out to me if they
00:00:17.900 want to be a part of the documentary. And one of the people that reached out to me was our guest
00:00:23.420 today, James Jones. How do you do? Welcome to the show. So tell me what made you want to reach out
00:00:30.500 to me today? Well, I'm one of those millions of fathers you mentioned a second ago. I suspect my
00:00:36.680 story is a little more extreme than most. There are certainly very distressing aspects of it.
00:00:44.500 I have not seen my son in two and a half years. An ongoing battle, legal battle for seven years.
00:00:54.300 And the system is broken, very badly broken. And I need to expose them. And this seems like the
00:01:03.700 ideal opportunity to me. So what do you say? There's a lot of people that say it's equally as
00:01:09.720 bad for men and for women. That's not my experience. Certainly not. There's many people that say you're
00:01:16.560 just going to be a one off. There's not. It's not that common. I think. Look, I think that's I think
00:01:25.940 that's wishful thinking on the part of the British public. This always happens to other people's
00:01:31.020 children, right? It never, it's never going to happen to your own. The state cares, right? That's
00:01:37.600 what we're told. They don't. Feminism, its most extreme form of feminism has taken hold in a very 1.00
00:01:46.960 bad way. And we're seeing the results of that. In my case, especially.
00:01:52.840 So I want to start, I always start with how you met the mother of your child. So because
00:02:03.060 a lot of the, the common, you know, complaint I get from more conservative leaning people
00:02:09.720 is that you guys in the documentary should just pick the right woman. And, you know, it's just you
00:02:17.480 guys picking bad women. So, okay, perhaps. So I want to know how you guys met, first of all. Okay, well,
00:02:27.880 my, my ex-wife is a Polish national. She was an economic migrant to Britain, I suppose. And she
00:02:39.480 worked in a hotel in South Shropshire, a very rural, traditional part of the world. And I was...
00:02:48.740 Okay, so this wasn't in a city. Certainly not, no. Because that's what they say. It's just you guys are
00:02:53.100 picking city girls. No, no. And that's why. Okay, so she was, she was Polish. Polish. So that's, she has an
00:03:01.560 Eastern European background, which is typically good, right? Very much so. Well, this is, I suspect there's, 0.99
00:03:08.160 there's an element, and I always felt this, that people would, would, would think, oh, you've chosen
00:03:16.500 Eastern European woman because she's going to do your bidding. She's going to behave, cook and clean, 1.00
00:03:21.640 that sort of thing. You can't get along with English women. That couldn't be further from the truth. 1.00
00:03:27.420 Not really. In my case. Okay. I can't speak for, for all men. But I've had Polish girlfriends.
00:03:35.640 I've had English girlfriends. I've had English girlfriends. And really, I like to keep an open mind on this sort of
00:03:43.980 thing. I didn't get to choose who I fell in love with, ultimately. And, you know, I was very much in love
00:03:52.740 with my ex-wife at the time. I met her, you know, I was just a local lad, a simple kind of farmer boy,
00:04:02.120 who's made good, perhaps, a very rural area. And I was out drinking in a pub with my friends
00:04:10.860 in Church Stratton, in the hills. And she was there drinking also. And we just hit it off. It's as
00:04:19.400 simple as that. So you met her at a local pub. That's right. She was a Polish girl. That's right.
00:04:25.760 Yes. She was quite a rural girl as well. In Poland, she came from a forestry background,
00:04:32.000 an idyllic part of Poland. It was a truly beautiful place. And were her parents still together?
00:04:41.440 No. No. Okay. No. There had been a very messy divorce there. And he had been driven to alcoholism.
00:04:51.560 And it was quite a tragic sight, really. I got on with the in-laws. They didn't speak English. I didn't
00:05:01.340 really speak Polish. I could order a beer. That's about it. But we got on, as was best, for all concern.
00:05:12.220 But yeah, sure, there was a history there of divorce.
00:05:16.580 I just ask, because there's younger men that watch the channel. So I'm just curious if there's
00:05:22.860 like patterns in the guys I interview of the women that tend to do this.
00:05:27.300 Okay.
00:05:28.500 Okay. And you said that you met her in the bar. And then how, when did you guys get married?
00:05:36.440 What happened next?
00:05:37.740 Well, that would be in 07 that we met.
00:05:41.020 My, she moved in to my flat in Shrewsbury very soon after, something of a whirlwind romance.
00:05:51.800 She would later claim that I stalked her and kind of coerced her into living with me, coerced her into 0.98
00:05:58.400 marriage and all this sort of thing. Clearly, completely absurd that I would be hanging around
00:06:05.060 into her place of work, even though she had invited me. Quite distressing to think of it
00:06:13.360 now, really. It was a beautiful relationship. And we fell in love with each other. It's as
00:06:17.740 pure and simple as that.
00:06:18.700 So, we, at the time, I was, I had several jobs. I was a driving instructor. I was studying
00:06:30.600 my degree. And I was an army reservist as well. And it transpired that there was an opportunity
00:06:38.660 coming up for me to go on active service in Afghanistan. And it's something that I developed
00:06:46.140 an ambition for. My ex-wife was not keen on the idea at all. And she became quite distressed
00:06:56.540 at the thought of this. There were threats for her going back to Poland, leaving me, etc.
00:07:02.580 A few weeks later, she became pregnant. Now, I like to think the best of her. I do like to
00:07:14.920 believe her. But it did seem convenient at the time. And some may say that it was a deliberate act
00:07:22.140 to keep me from going and to ensure a level of security, perhaps.
00:07:28.720 Because she didn't want you to go.
00:07:30.180 No, she did not want me to go. She's claimed that she had changed her contraceptive pill.
00:07:39.280 I choose, I still choose to believe that myself.
00:07:43.280 Really? Even now?
00:07:47.800 Honestly, I choose to believe that.
00:07:51.400 But you don't really.
00:07:53.060 The truth may be somewhat more complex.
00:07:55.700 It's just, that's really convenient. Because you had this job opportunity, and you were thinking
00:08:00.420 about going. She didn't want you to go.
00:08:02.340 That's right.
00:08:02.700 And then she becomes pregnant.
00:08:04.280 That's right.
00:08:06.560 Okay, so then what happened when she became pregnant?
00:08:09.080 Well, I immediately, maybe five minutes later, asked her to marry me. As is customary of a gentleman,
00:08:16.220 you might say, and the way I'd been raised.
00:08:18.920 You felt like that was like the right thing to do?
00:08:20.580 Just the right thing to do. I still think to this day, it was the right thing to do.
00:08:26.280 And we got married some months later in 2009.
00:08:30.140 And my son came along in early 2010.
00:08:35.100 Bye, laughs!
00:08:40.280 Bye.
00:08:42.140 Bye.
00:08:43.000 Bye.
00:08:43.280 Bye.
00:08:43.860 Bye.
00:08:45.000 Bye.
00:08:48.080 Bye.
00:08:48.460 Bye.
00:08:49.040 Bye.
00:08:49.900 Bye.
00:08:52.200 Bye.
00:08:52.960 Bye.
00:09:02.980 Bye.
00:09:04.100 Bye.