JustPearlyThings - June 26, 2023


Fat Instagram Model Gets Cornered By This Question


Episode Stats

Length

10 minutes

Words per Minute

207.12302

Word Count

2,113

Sentence Count

141

Misogynist Sentences

2


Summary

In this episode, we discuss the role of enabling and accommodating fat people and why it is so important to have a healthy relationship with food and exercise. We also discuss why fat people should not starve themselves of certain things and why you should not be obsessed with losing weight.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 I had a cousin that died from, like, drug addiction.
00:00:03.360 I'm sorry to hear that.
00:00:03.880 I mean, it's okay.
00:00:05.040 It was a while ago.
00:00:06.040 But I just don't think that enabling...
00:00:07.820 Like, I wouldn't look at someone that gave him drugs in a healthy way
00:00:11.100 and say, oh, thank you for that.
00:00:13.440 I think it would actually be a negative thing.
00:00:16.460 I think there's a difference between enabling and accommodating.
00:00:19.640 And one is realistic.
00:00:21.840 Yeah.
00:00:22.560 Is it a means to an end?
00:00:23.980 Accommodating and, like, safe usage.
00:00:26.420 That's a means to an end, right?
00:00:27.560 The end is that you'd hope that the person stops using drugs,
00:00:30.180 accommodating fatness.
00:00:31.620 The end is that you hope that the person...
00:00:33.200 Yeah, so in the same vein,
00:00:35.040 how is a person going to stop using drugs if they're being given it safely?
00:00:38.340 And how is a fat person going to stop getting fat
00:00:41.400 or maintain his weight if he doesn't stop or he or she doesn't stop eating?
00:00:44.900 Something interesting that I came across recently was,
00:00:48.440 as a plus-size model, I was thinking, like,
00:00:50.140 I want to make my own brand.
00:00:51.660 I want to invest a lot of money into something
00:00:53.740 and start producing something.
00:00:54.920 And I thought about making plus-size lingerie.
00:00:56.340 I thought about making plus-size clothes.
00:00:58.040 I spoke to some financial advisors.
00:00:59.880 I spoke to a few people.
00:01:00.740 And everybody told me, do not do it
00:01:02.700 because there's no money in staying fat.
00:01:05.600 Like, that is what I was taught by professionals.
00:01:07.620 They were like, the money is in losing weight, not being fat.
00:01:10.480 But why?
00:01:11.060 Because he asked you a question, like,
00:01:12.420 what's the best way to help fat people?
00:01:14.240 Isn't it diet and exercise?
00:01:15.820 Isn't that it?
00:01:16.180 I didn't answer that.
00:01:17.440 Go ahead.
00:01:17.820 The best way to lose weight is to first start telling yourself
00:01:23.960 that it's one step at a time, one step at a time.
00:01:28.540 Have a plan.
00:01:29.980 Give yourself a time.
00:01:30.900 Okay, imagine I do 10 sit-ups today.
00:01:33.440 Tomorrow I'm going to go for 15.
00:01:35.100 If it's still hard, I'm going to do 15 on the third day.
00:01:38.080 Then I'm going to push myself to do 20.
00:01:40.940 And along with that, even trying new foods
00:01:43.180 and just eating fresh things.
00:01:44.880 It's diet and exercise.
00:01:45.840 It's diet and exercise.
00:01:46.980 But a lot of people that don't lose weight,
00:01:49.520 it's because of mobility issues.
00:01:51.420 So it's, again, if I can't do this with my knee,
00:01:54.200 what can I do?
00:01:55.060 How can I move my upper, upper, upper?
00:01:56.740 Not everyone has a mobility issue.
00:01:59.140 Like, for the last three years,
00:02:01.600 like, governments have put out ad campaigns.
00:02:04.240 You should take this.
00:02:05.500 It's safe.
00:02:06.700 Or, you know, smoking ads are put up on television.
00:02:10.340 Would you guys be opposed to a government ad saying,
00:02:13.240 if you continue eating this way, you're going to die?
00:02:15.840 That's why they had the obesity causes cancer ad.
00:02:17.840 I just want to say, firstly,
00:02:20.100 losing weight is 20% fitness and it's 80% nutrition.
00:02:24.960 So when you're talking about mobility,
00:02:27.060 it has nothing to do with sit-ups,
00:02:28.620 it has nothing to do with running or in the gym.
00:02:31.160 It's 80% diet anyway.
00:02:33.040 So if you want to lose weight,
00:02:35.440 then know where the 80% is, know where the 20% is,
00:02:38.180 and you personalise your programme to that.
00:02:40.860 Also, when people, if you want to do something,
00:02:42.900 I need to come in because there are a couple of things
00:02:45.000 that I want to push back on from something that Pia said.
00:02:48.400 It goes back to every,
00:02:49.620 like, a lot of these things tie back to each other.
00:02:51.680 You said both things can exist at the same time.
00:02:55.020 That, in my opinion, is a very wrong ideology
00:02:56.960 because if you say you can want to lose weight
00:03:01.440 and at the same time enjoy your body the way it is
00:03:04.580 in its current state,
00:03:06.660 I think that is you actually stopping yourself
00:03:09.440 from actually losing weight
00:03:10.280 because both things can't actually exist at the same time.
00:03:13.040 It goes back to the same thing we talk about on this podcast
00:03:15.240 where women want everything.
00:03:16.940 You can't have everything in life.
00:03:18.540 So if you really want to lose weight,
00:03:20.220 you need to, how will I put it?
00:03:23.940 You need to basically starve yourself of certain things.
00:03:27.040 So you can't be enjoying those things
00:03:29.160 and trying to lose weight because you wouldn't lose weight.
00:03:32.440 So, for instance, like you said, a bikini should be earned.
00:03:35.200 When you stop yourself from wearing a bikini
00:03:37.680 till you earn it, you would actually get that goal.
00:03:40.340 You're saying disappointment.
00:03:41.060 Yeah, but if you're able to wear the bikini on a Sunday
00:03:45.440 and say you're going to go to the gym on a Monday,
00:03:48.480 you're not going to work as hard in the gym.
00:03:50.120 I think that you're confusing aesthetics and health there
00:03:54.180 because for me, those things aren't particularly linked.
00:03:56.660 I want to lose weight because I want to be healthy,
00:03:58.220 but I don't dislike the way that I look.
00:03:59.600 I'm not confusing it.
00:04:00.480 I'm not confusing it.
00:04:00.960 You know why?
00:04:01.620 Because a lot of times we try to be deeper
00:04:05.200 than we actually should be.
00:04:06.200 A lot of these things are actually very soft.
00:04:07.380 Trying to make it more complex.
00:04:08.860 Facts, facts, facts, facts.
00:04:10.080 Before you can talk about all these things about the mind,
00:04:13.020 your eyes are the first thing that you used to see.
00:04:15.540 So your brain is going to work on what it sees.
00:04:18.360 So no matter what you try to tell yourself in your head,
00:04:21.800 your eyes still see what you look like.
00:04:24.280 And that's the reason why I wanted to ask the question
00:04:25.900 to the personal trainers because it's very funny.
00:04:28.280 Pearl asked what is the best way to lose weight.
00:04:31.240 And with all due respect,
00:04:32.480 I don't think you are in the right position
00:04:34.960 to answer that question, Puff.
00:04:37.080 No, but he did say partially was correct.
00:04:40.540 No, I know.
00:04:41.340 But the reason why I'm saying that is because this is the thing.
00:04:45.120 It's like...
00:04:48.360 That question should have been answered
00:04:49.940 by the personal trainers, in my opinion.
00:04:51.520 Because one, they have worked with people
00:04:53.320 that have helped people lose weight,
00:04:54.400 so they know.
00:04:55.720 Even if you haven't done it,
00:04:58.460 you saying it is kind of like, okay,
00:05:01.020 it kind of counteracts your argument.
00:05:03.640 There are personal trainers
00:05:05.040 who actually don't understand injuries.
00:05:09.140 They don't literally, they don't understand it.
00:05:11.020 Because they keep on working with fit people
00:05:13.580 and that's why they just...
00:05:15.280 No, but that's another fun level.
00:05:16.280 No, there's a lot of...
00:05:18.260 Locally, like people who...
00:05:20.480 Because there's something you said
00:05:21.440 that makes me know
00:05:22.520 that you don't really understand this.
00:05:24.420 Because you said something like,
00:05:25.780 when you go to the gym,
00:05:27.400 it's scary.
00:05:28.020 You see these people working out.
00:05:29.020 The reality is,
00:05:29.600 because I worked in the gym,
00:05:30.300 the reality is,
00:05:31.280 the fittest people are actually
00:05:32.780 the most empathetic people.
00:05:33.900 Okay, okay.
00:05:34.680 Because they've had to do the hard work.
00:05:36.300 They know what to take.
00:05:37.060 Just last week...
00:05:37.740 I think what you do,
00:05:42.060 what you've done essentially
00:05:43.220 is you've put a mental block on yourself.
00:05:45.540 So you see things
00:05:46.480 that are actually not there.
00:05:47.500 You go into the gym,
00:05:48.300 you see people looking at you
00:05:49.240 and you think,
00:05:49.880 oh my God, they're judging me.
00:05:50.840 The reality is,
00:05:51.480 most people don't even care
00:05:52.960 about other people in the gym.
00:05:53.700 Okay, so I joined the gym
00:05:55.500 a week and a half ago in Essex.
00:05:58.900 Now, it's my induction
00:06:00.560 and some things obviously
00:06:02.720 I know how to use
00:06:03.800 because I use it.
00:06:04.900 But because I want to improve myself,
00:06:06.780 I was like,
00:06:08.100 so are you going to show me around?
00:06:10.180 He's like,
00:06:10.660 yeah, that's that.
00:06:11.740 That's that.
00:06:12.280 And I'm like,
00:06:13.140 so are you going to show me
00:06:13.880 how to use it
00:06:14.400 because I at least want to use it?
00:06:16.360 And then he goes,
00:06:17.380 well, you're not going to use it,
00:06:18.540 are you?
00:06:18.840 I'm like,
00:06:19.740 why am I joining then?
00:06:20.820 I'm like,
00:06:21.440 you shouldn't be working
00:06:22.900 in the gym.
00:06:23.360 I literally told him.
00:06:24.280 Yeah, you changed him.
00:06:25.480 That's a bad experience.
00:06:26.760 Yeah, that's just a bad experience.
00:06:27.820 No, but it happens a lot
00:06:29.500 and it's not large
00:06:30.400 because that's what I mean
00:06:31.620 by encouragement.
00:06:33.280 When people aren't used
00:06:34.740 to working with big people.
00:06:35.760 Hey, 11 a.m. tomorrow,
00:06:37.700 you come.
00:06:38.920 11 a.m. tomorrow.
00:06:40.820 I'm just going to say this.
00:06:42.000 I was just going to say this.
00:06:43.660 You offered this same thing
00:06:45.040 the last time he was here
00:06:45.820 and between then and now,
00:06:47.700 we haven't seen you here.
00:06:48.880 Can I say why?
00:06:50.180 Can I tell you why?
00:06:51.860 Why?
00:06:52.520 My dad's got cancer
00:06:53.640 and he's been in hospital
00:06:55.540 and this week
00:06:56.940 I actually gave him
00:06:57.780 a sponge bath
00:06:59.140 and when you're going
00:07:02.980 to lose a father
00:07:03.840 and when you're seeing
00:07:05.660 them deteriorate,
00:07:07.500 you ain't like,
00:07:09.600 it's like I've just been
00:07:11.300 going,
00:07:12.160 it's like I don't have
00:07:12.940 any emotions.
00:07:14.600 So,
00:07:15.080 sorry to hear about that.
00:07:15.720 I've just been keeping busy
00:07:17.240 and a part of keeping busy
00:07:19.060 is I know I need
00:07:20.160 to drink water
00:07:20.860 and actually care
00:07:22.440 for myself
00:07:22.940 which is keeping active
00:07:24.700 and getting good sleep
00:07:27.240 and literally eating healthy
00:07:28.780 and that's the way
00:07:29.580 I'm living now
00:07:30.300 and when I go to work,
00:07:31.960 stuff that you see
00:07:32.680 on Instagram,
00:07:33.520 TikTok,
00:07:34.080 events and stuff like that,
00:07:35.040 I only go there,
00:07:36.520 get the picture done,
00:07:37.780 take a few,
00:07:38.460 say hello to a few people
00:07:39.460 and leave
00:07:39.860 and then I wake up,
00:07:41.060 I've been in hospital
00:07:41.740 then I've got errands
00:07:42.820 to do like,
00:07:44.880 I live a life
00:07:45.720 at Hannah Montana.
00:07:46.780 I cook and clean at home,
00:07:48.520 I do the caring,
00:07:50.400 when my nephews are here,
00:07:52.220 I'm an uncle,
00:07:53.280 I actually read books
00:07:54.340 to them,
00:07:55.060 I teach them how to cook
00:07:56.160 because I want them
00:07:57.000 to have real skills.
00:07:58.220 When they go out
00:07:59.160 and I take them out
00:08:00.340 to like we learn
00:08:01.500 about things,
00:08:02.340 nature,
00:08:02.940 all these things.
00:08:03.600 So you don't have
00:08:04.120 any personal time
00:08:04.820 for yourself.
00:08:06.340 I don't actually know
00:08:07.840 and that's the thing
00:08:09.500 when someone's losing
00:08:11.400 their life
00:08:12.120 or they will
00:08:14.240 and hopefully they don't,
00:08:15.940 you just have to be positive
00:08:17.060 and there needs to be that care
00:08:18.100 and I'm someone
00:08:18.560 who cares about my dad.
00:08:19.780 And I have a lot
00:08:20.940 of like empathy for that
00:08:22.300 but it's like
00:08:23.460 you're sitting
00:08:24.480 on a couch
00:08:25.700 for three hours here
00:08:27.000 so it kind of just shows
00:08:28.540 where your priorities are.
00:08:30.260 Can I say something?
00:08:31.260 Because you've been here
00:08:32.700 like twice
00:08:33.280 and you know,
00:08:34.040 keep coming,
00:08:34.580 and you're very good content.
00:08:35.560 You also say do
00:08:36.260 on social media as well.
00:08:37.500 Nothing like personal
00:08:38.780 but it kind of shows
00:08:40.100 like where your priorities are
00:08:41.480 because you have time
00:08:42.140 for this.
00:08:42.640 But Pearl,
00:08:43.200 without sounding rude,
00:08:45.100 as much as I love
00:08:46.340 this podcast,
00:08:47.700 when Romeo asked me,
00:08:49.040 I was like Romeo,
00:08:50.360 na na na,
00:08:51.480 ooh na na na,
00:08:52.720 because I actually
00:08:53.740 really wanted to watch
00:08:55.100 and dub tonight
00:08:56.120 because why?
00:08:56.800 because it helps me
00:08:57.520 keep active.
00:08:58.360 I'm going to dance.
00:08:59.500 I'm going to be like
00:09:00.540 grooving,
00:09:01.680 I swear,
00:09:02.580 I have a good time.
00:09:04.540 Podcast ain't really me
00:09:05.640 but coming on your podcast
00:09:06.780 because I enjoy you.
00:09:08.120 Yeah.
00:09:08.660 That's why I'm here.
00:09:09.500 Or I'm actually,
00:09:11.480 I'm not a person
00:09:12.160 who sits like this.
00:09:12.960 But my point is,
00:09:14.080 my point isn't
00:09:14.760 about the podcasting.
00:09:16.060 It's just,
00:09:16.700 I think we all make choices
00:09:18.260 in life
00:09:18.780 about where we spend
00:09:19.740 our time, right?
00:09:21.480 Sorry,
00:09:22.020 I just need to,
00:09:23.140 I want to share
00:09:23.700 a personal experience
00:09:24.600 so this might help you.
00:09:27.060 When I started working here,
00:09:28.440 I went through
00:09:28.920 certain personal things
00:09:29.880 in my life
00:09:30.280 which I'm not going
00:09:30.740 to disclose
00:09:31.900 but I think Pearl
00:09:32.540 knows a few of them.
00:09:33.780 But the point
00:09:34.720 I'm trying to make is
00:09:35.380 for the longest time,
00:09:36.480 even after I started
00:09:37.640 getting my life
00:09:38.200 back on track,
00:09:39.420 I wasn't working out.
00:09:41.180 I'm so on,
00:09:41.720 you might look at me,
00:09:42.380 you might think
00:09:42.680 I'm fit
00:09:43.120 but I'm only just
00:09:44.440 starting to get
00:09:44.940 my fitness back
00:09:45.600 but the reality is
00:09:46.780 the reason why
00:09:47.880 I wasn't working out
00:09:48.400 was because of
00:09:48.940 all this life stress
00:09:49.800 and all of that
00:09:50.420 and even when I
00:09:51.480 kind of started
00:09:52.760 getting my life on track,
00:09:53.600 I still wasn't working out
00:09:54.620 but the reality is
00:09:55.460 because that was happening
00:09:56.480 because I wasn't
00:09:57.120 prioritizing it.
00:09:58.640 Once I started,
00:09:59.460 I got punched in the ribs
00:10:00.640 when we were sparring
00:10:01.480 the other day
00:10:01.880 and I kind of woke up
00:10:02.820 and I was like,
00:10:03.480 you know what,
00:10:03.740 I'm going to make time
00:10:04.340 for the gym
00:10:04.760 and I have been able
00:10:06.440 to create the time.
00:10:07.480 So the reality is
00:10:08.020 no matter what you're
00:10:08.680 going through in life,
00:10:09.800 you can always create time
00:10:11.000 for the gym.