JustPearlyThings - June 06, 2023


Feminist STRUGGLES To Defend Her Stance


Episode Stats


Length

8 minutes

Words per minute

224.7279

Word count

1,817

Sentence count

2

Harmful content

Misogyny

12

sentences flagged

Hate speech

9

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, we discuss the issue of co-parenting with children and the role of men in this situation. We discuss the benefits and disadvantages of having a child with a divorced partner and the issues surrounding child support and child care.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 and raise children better than single women so statistically he would be the better parent 0.89
00:00:04.720 if he's equipped to do it yeah there are loads of people that don't want to like to be and yet
00:00:10.080 straight away we assume women are inherently better i i agree with you on that i think but 0.99
00:00:14.000 there are also lots of men that don't want to take on the primary care of responsibility and
00:00:20.240 i think because it generally falls onto the woman to do that i don't understand why there would be
00:00:27.120 men that would be like i'm not going to add i'm not going to add the law set up for that the law set
00:00:31.520 up to give the woman um the win when it comes to the child custody yeah you if the father is contesting
00:00:39.680 it yeah and it went once it goes to that yes that is definitely true but even if there are loads of
00:00:45.360 men that don't even want to to do joint custody with their partner if a man's getting happy to do
00:00:50.960 every other weekend if a man's getting married chances are he wants to have children and so
00:00:55.760 the idea that he wouldn't want to take care of those children i think it's just false because
00:00:59.440 a lot of men actually complain that they don't they don't have a proper relationship with children
00:01:02.400 because they were working yeah i think that's a great point you know i think your argument was
00:01:06.320 saying him being the primary carer then yes but in terms of co-parenting i think most men that get
00:01:10.800 married and have kids would like to co-parent 50 50. yeah and the people you're talking about are they
00:01:14.800 actually married or are they just people that ended up getting getting pregnant by some guy that she was 0.99
00:01:19.360 sleeping with and now all of a sudden is i didn't add in that no but i'm saying that's important because what
00:01:23.680 they said is if a man gets married most of the times because he wants kids because if you don't
00:01:28.000 want children as a man there's no point getting married why the hell would you do that because 0.98
00:01:31.360 the main point i've been i i if i get married it will solely be for my fam for my children it won't
00:01:36.880 be for no one else because it won't be for the woman it won't be for me but when but if that doesn't
00:01:41.920 work out and you separate from the person would you not want to be involved and actually financially
00:01:49.120 providing for your child yeah just like my dad did my dad weren't paying child support he bought
00:01:53.920 everything for me my school uniform if i needed football boots he paid for that if i needed
00:01:57.920 anything and then he would give me money every weekend to give my mom to buy the food shopping
00:02:02.400 my dad paid for everything but like my man didn't have to go through the courts and talk about you
00:02:05.840 have to pay this amount and that amount if i needed anything he paid for it and i'll do the same
00:02:09.200 thing for my child but i'm not giving you money to go out with your brethren's and and twerk
00:02:12.800 brother i'm not doing it if i'm financially liable for the child there are certain rights
00:02:17.120 that should be given that woman you should be held if i'm financially reliable for a child there are 0.93
00:02:20.720 certain um things that should be given to me by the law so i should have a certain amount of hours
00:02:26.560 to see that child if i'm paying for him but that's not happening because if women have if a woman has 1.00
00:02:30.320 custody she can say no you're not seeing it i i agree so so my question is how are men not held
00:02:35.360 accountable in this situation exactly the point that he made out that i'm not going to give her money to
00:02:39.760 go out to work in on the weekend if you have a child with the woman that is going to be the one 1.00
00:02:45.040 that's going out to work in take accountability that you put your willy in the wrong place okay
00:02:49.040 okay so he does he is he is held accountable because now he does have a consequence so but
00:02:55.280 what is the woman's consequence she has to be a mother and bring up the child no but she gets free 1.00
00:02:59.440 money wait hold a minute is a quote they're not free wait there's a consequence okay bringing up a kid
00:03:04.800 for a woman because i thought i thought i thought women are maternal so the idea of having a kid
00:03:10.720 is something that it should be treasured and also you chose to have that child nobody just rang your
00:03:17.680 doorbell and said here you go either way the whole point is that the women don't have a consequence in 1.00
00:03:23.680 the situation because they get child support they get alimony money isn't the same as bringing up the
00:03:29.920 trial and they get custody you're right so and on top of that the dude doesn't even get to see his
00:03:35.200 kid as much well he should be so you should but it's not that's the whole point yeah anyway whether
00:03:42.480 you get divorced or not you're having a child so you have to do all those things i'm talking about
00:03:48.960 a woman's consequence is raising a child by herself is like saying a man's consequence for 0.95
00:03:53.840 getting divorced is having to come home from working and he has to make food for himself
00:04:00.400 it's not even it's not even close because rearing a child is very different than making a meal yeah
00:04:05.360 but it's a choice that he has to work and support himself through work as a consequence of him and
00:04:09.680 then he's had a child out there and he has to pay for the child so if you guys are all saying that men
00:04:14.640 shouldn't be paying for their kids is that what you're saying no it depends okay so i told you i'll pay for
00:04:19.280 everything i said i'll pay for everything i said i'm not paying for you to dutty wine though i'm not
00:04:24.960 doing that i'm saying the man should be able to pay for his kid but i don't think the woman is entitled 1.00
00:04:29.600 to his money just because she got a kid off of him and that incentivizes women to have bad behavior 1.00
00:04:35.600 like stealing a condom and trying to get a kid off but you're going into that if the money is coming
00:04:41.760 into the woman's account that she is going to be using it badly they often do this is a common
00:04:47.280 complaint this is a common complaint i hear from men but how would they know maybe that's the
00:04:53.760 solution okay the accountability is that you should know where your money is going for your child so
00:05:00.000 wouldn't the man know where the money is going if he spent it on the kid yeah yeah exactly right
00:05:05.440 right so shouldn't the man be able to decide where his money goes and should he be able he's gonna do
00:05:11.280 like the shopping he's gonna buy the clothes he's gonna pay for the school fees whatever it is that
00:05:16.560 the money that would be going into the woman's account if he does that there's online shopping 0.99
00:05:20.960 you know just send me the food shop send me the reimbursement gang 100 because then you live to
00:05:29.280 your means that way right but i'm saying why is she entitled to child support why can't the man just 0.99
00:05:33.680 spend the money on his own the the child support should be for the child yeah and that should be
00:05:40.720 how it is however between the two of you you go through your accountability that you are going to pay for
00:05:45.680 this or it's going to go into my account and i'm paying for it this way there should be child support
00:05:51.360 for the child to be supported well shouldn't it just either but shouldn't it just be 50 50 50 50
00:05:56.720 custody and then 50 50 they pay when it's at the best case scenario i think that is exactly how it
00:06:02.240 should be it depends exactly how it should be but even with because if you broke up and he was the higher
00:06:07.840 earner the 50 50 you might want to have a elevator why are you entitled to a better lifestyle no no i'm saying
00:06:14.080 for the child i'm saying for the child say you're saying the 50 50 when the the child's there with
00:06:19.120 the mom it should be paid for bro i know what you're saying but then i'll just be like you know what
00:06:22.720 bro mommy's broke fam that's life when you're here is it's live innit when you go home it's beans on
00:06:29.280 toast yeah that's it this is what it is that's gonna want to stay with me that's not that's not a benefit
00:06:33.840 but that doesn't matter the benefit would have been her not leaving in the first place but now you've left
00:06:38.400 but you're worried about what you're doing you're punishing you're punishing the woman no no no no
00:06:44.320 i'm not punishing the child because the child can come stay with me whenever they want i'm not
00:06:48.160 punishing the child because your mom left me bro like it's not your fault but you know you always
00:06:51.600 got a house here every boy so if you want to stay here five days daddy got five days money it's not
00:06:55.280 like if you're poor like you're what's wrong with that yeah there's nothing wrong with that evil yeah
00:07:01.040 i'm just saying inadvertently you may be punishing through punishing your wife for like
00:07:07.440 saying look i'm the better parent you may punish the child exactly in the way
00:07:14.880 but he will see his mother as less than his father
00:07:23.120 okay but then she should get a job like the men have to go get it you can work 1.00
00:07:27.200 yeah that's true like the woman is inherently punishing the child by divorcing them anyway 1.00
00:07:32.080 yes yeah so yeah if if there's two wrongs right she's now in a situation where she can't afford 0.61
00:07:38.320 the same lifestyle that her husband can that's on her yeah she's not entitled to the life so we're 0.98
00:07:42.720 going to exasperate the poor decision are we just going to
00:07:47.680 of the effects that's on the kids because we we all know the statistics of what happens to children when
00:07:52.080 it when it when the the nuclear family breaks down so we can't be like egotistical ignorant of the
00:07:58.240 facts of knowing the effect is going to have on a child so we still need to maintain the stability of
00:08:02.080 the kids upbringing whilst doing what else needs to be done