JustPearlyThings - Happy Single Mother's Day (Call-in Show)

00:00:00.000 Thank you.

00:00:30.000 Thank you.

00:01:00.000 Thank you.

00:01:30.000 This headline from The Hill, it caught my eye.

00:01:32.320 Most young men are single.

00:01:34.000 Most young women are not.

00:01:35.340 Young men have fallen faster than any demographic in America over the last 40 years.

00:01:40.020 It's a different world now.

00:01:41.060 Like, we don't need men the way that they used to.

00:01:43.080 Nobody needs men.

00:01:44.120 The future is female.

00:01:47.340 Men and women are drifting further apart, and society is crumbling because of it.

00:01:54.060 A fascinating debate has broken out about the value of marriage.

00:01:57.160 You've kind of got the trad con versus red pill thing.

00:01:59.860 This men's rights crowd that sometimes just goes too far the other way.

00:02:03.420 You need to stop acting like grown boys and infants and actually become men.

00:02:07.520 Marriage is a bond, and it's a sacred bond.

00:02:10.140 It's a machine designed to extract resources from you.

00:02:13.100 Now, many of the red-pilled have taken the position that it's bad for men to get married.

00:02:18.160 Hannah...

00:02:18.880 Most controversial faces in all of the internet.

00:02:22.140 She goes on to say that marriage is a terrible deal for men.

00:02:25.020 Because if me and you were in a business contract, you would never sign a contract where I am paid to leave.

00:02:29.980 Gee, what could go wrong there?

00:02:32.380 74% or something of divorces are initiated by women.

00:02:35.920 Men have everything to lose, primarily their own children.

00:02:38.820 Men get killed by the courts and by divorce laws.

00:02:41.480 I had no idea that courts of family law were courts of equity, not courts of law.

00:02:46.440 Because in family court, you don't need evidence to accuse someone of abuse.

00:02:49.660 You need no evidence.

00:02:50.780 When you guys say get married young, a lot of these men don't know what they're signing up for,

00:02:54.460 and you're not going to be there when their entire life falls apart.

00:02:57.860 I interview them on the other side.

00:02:59.980 I didn't meet my son until he was 15 months old.

00:03:02.700 How much did you spend trying to get him back?

00:03:04.820 The legal fees alone was about $200,000.

00:03:07.180 Before you know it, you're homeless.

00:03:08.620 You're literally just thrown out onto the street.

00:03:10.520 We absolutely reinforce bad behavior from women.

00:03:12.920 Wives are taught to leave their husbands.

00:03:14.860 And then daughters grow up without their fathers.

00:03:17.220 Family is the foundation of society.

00:03:18.940 Every problem in society comes from single mother homes.

00:03:22.120 A lot of women will just chase this negative rabbit hole of happiness, endless happiness.

00:03:26.420 Feminism's biggest failure is it lies to women.

00:03:28.320 We tell women to date as many guys as possible.

00:03:30.200 We tell them to put off family into marriage.

00:03:31.900 You are allowed to leave your perfect husband.

00:03:34.720 You are allowed to end a relationship with a really great boyfriend.

00:03:39.140 Oh, freeze your ex.

00:03:39.920 Have an abortion.

00:03:40.960 What?

00:03:41.360 You're evil.

00:03:42.200 I don't think there's anything else in life that we actually ever go into preparing to fail.

00:03:46.040 Right.

00:03:46.180 Like if you have the mentality of this is going to go wrong and be pessimistic, naturally the outcome is going to be that it's going to fail anyway.

00:03:52.940 It's self-sabotage.

00:03:53.840 And that's the thing.

00:03:54.400 Like women are so willing to leave marriages because they're not happy.

00:03:57.640 This is not about happiness.

00:03:59.400 The most important thing is the children.

00:04:01.720 And the problem is we have a modern society where it's me, me, me, my feelings.

00:04:06.200 Leave when I feel like it instead of doing what's best for the kids.

00:04:09.300 This myth that we live in an age of male privilege, where's my male privilege?

00:04:14.020 They think, well, men have all the rights.

00:04:15.560 They have all the power.

00:04:16.860 Privileged patriarchal system that we have.

00:04:19.120 Why doesn't our society care about men's rights?

00:04:21.740 I have no friends, no wife, and no social life.

00:04:24.980 Men are alone in this situation.

00:04:26.900 Men are homeless.

00:04:27.860 Men are thinking about eating guns.

00:04:29.620 I've seen so many men on the brink of suicide and they didn't do anything wrong.

00:04:33.940 How are you equal if the men are the ones that have to fight and die to defend the country?

00:04:39.500 The men are the ones that build and maintain all the infrastructure.

00:04:43.340 Women are helplessly dependent upon men.

00:04:46.000 The so-called deaths of despair from suicide, overdose, or alcohol, three times higher among men than among women.

00:04:53.060 Culture is telling men, you are no good.

00:04:54.920 You've got to get your act together.

00:04:56.120 I think men have failed themselves.

00:04:57.740 What kind of a man are you?

00:04:59.000 What kind of a woman are you going to attract?

00:05:00.820 If men are in trouble, so are women.

00:05:03.620 Everybody knows this is a huge problem, but nobody wants to admit it.

00:05:07.160 Every single woman at the table said they wanted a man.

00:05:09.500 500K.

00:05:10.200 500K.

00:05:10.900 Translation declined, and our economy goes into decline.

00:05:14.220 Civilization will crumble.

00:05:15.920 The American story does not end well.

00:05:18.480 This is an existential.

00:05:23.120 What up?

00:05:24.260 What up, guys?

00:05:26.000 Welcome to another episode of Pearl Daily here on the Audacity Network.

00:05:30.200 So that was my documentary that I am making called What's In It For Men.

00:05:37.000 Unfortunately, getting demonetized really derailed this in the past year.

00:05:41.240 Women decided to flag my channel because of the topics that I talk about, and really, they succeeded.

00:05:47.260 Women are spiteful.

00:05:48.840 They really, they can and do and will try to ruin your life.

00:05:52.840 Like, there's no ifs, ands, or buts, just when.

00:05:55.400 And I really do enjoy doing what I do.

00:05:57.580 I really enjoy being honest, but unfortunately, you do need funding to do that.

00:06:02.480 So our goal is to raise a million dollars for this documentary.

00:06:05.880 That's a super lofty goal.

00:06:07.680 Some would say maybe unreachable.

00:06:09.340 Maybe it is.

00:06:09.860 I don't know.

00:06:10.560 The reason being is if I can raise that much, I can hire Matt Walsh's team from the same team.

00:06:16.000 I don't want to say his team, but the same team that produced What Is A Woman.

00:06:18.780 That's the quote they gave us.

00:06:19.880 However, if we get to around $100,000 to $150,000, that will get the documentary done.

00:06:28.060 That's like the lower quotes I've gotten.

00:06:31.400 So right now, the GoFundMe, the link to this is in the description.

00:06:37.160 We're at $18,000.

00:06:39.320 Now, I am ultimately super grateful that you guys gave this to me to begin with.

00:06:44.440 There's two routes we can go.

00:06:45.600 We can either hire someone else or maybe bring a full-time person in-house.

00:06:51.840 And I'm open to either of those options.

00:06:54.720 If you guys have a bigger donation that you want to do, we're open to profit share.

00:06:59.280 We're open to some sort of advertisement that we could potentially do.

00:07:06.600 JustPearlyThings at gmail.com.

00:07:08.100 Second announcement is that we are launching our school academy tomorrow.

00:07:11.900 I am allowing you guys, if you sign up now on the website, which is TheAudacityNetwork.com.

00:07:17.260 The link to that is also in the description.

00:07:19.160 It should be the second link.

00:07:22.140 That is going to have information on how you guys can get custody.

00:07:26.400 It's going to improve your love life, your money.

00:07:29.160 And essentially, all of these smart, intelligent guests that I've made over the years are going

00:07:33.260 to be teaching you different things.

00:07:34.800 I have a child support officer that's telling you guys how to lower and avoid child support.

00:07:40.040 That's going on.

00:07:40.880 There's a private investigator coming on Friday to teach you guys how to catch your girl cheating.

00:07:46.300 It's better to test her before you marry her, right?

00:07:49.580 So if you guys can, feel free.

00:07:52.340 Thank you to BR Merrick for this $1,000 donation.

00:07:55.920 Okay, so we're a little bit earlier today.

00:07:58.400 My little sister is graduating high school.

00:08:00.900 She's the last one, so I do have to make that.

00:08:04.500 But today we're talking about single mothers.

00:08:07.180 So as you guys know, Sunday was single mother's day.

00:08:10.980 I mean, mother's day.

00:08:12.800 But when the majority of kids are born out of wedlock and into single mother homes and kids are,

00:08:18.940 you know, and parents are breaking up before the age of five, really, we should just change

00:08:23.420 the national name to single mother's day.

00:08:26.020 So I was traveling and I wasn't able to do my mother's day special.

00:08:29.920 So now here I am.

00:08:31.180 This is going to be the dedication to single mother's day.

00:08:36.360 Modern women are still perpetuating this narrative that being a mother is the most difficult job

00:08:41.100 job in the world.

00:08:42.780 You see women saying this all the time on podcasts, on TV.

00:08:46.200 It's everywhere.

00:08:47.260 You know, men work the dangerous jobs in society.

00:08:51.700 They build the buildings.

00:08:55.260 They work on the oil rigs.

00:08:58.040 They do the plumbing.

00:09:00.820 And they've made all these conveniences that make life easier for women.

00:09:05.520 But it's dismissed by women because they, what, give birth?

00:09:10.240 Dogs give birth.

00:09:11.900 Do we revere dogs super highly?

00:09:14.060 Do we revere bitches?

00:09:15.300 Right?

00:09:17.120 I'm hilarious.

00:09:18.260 I don't care what anyone says.

00:09:19.180 Modern women also say that all women are more nurturing because of the sexes, right?

00:09:24.560 Because they give birth to children and they're automatically more nurturing.

00:09:28.860 But, you know, as we know, that's not true.

00:09:30.560 If you look at the stats, the most likely person to abuse and murder children is almost always

00:09:37.300 women.

00:09:37.900 So much so that when there's an infanticide, meaning that a child dies within the first

00:09:42.220 year of life, do you know who's most responsible?

00:09:45.360 Do you know who the police don't even look for?

00:09:47.300 A man.

00:09:47.840 They look for the women.

00:09:48.720 It's most likely the mother.

00:09:51.020 And they don't even throw these women that are throwing their kids in dumpsters in jail.

00:09:55.320 I just saw a case recently of a woman that got like 20 years.

00:09:59.340 I couldn't even believe it.

00:10:01.440 I didn't think it was possible for women to go to jail.

00:10:05.020 So the grim reality is that modern mothers are some of the coldest, most callous, the most

00:10:11.020 selfish women in the history of humankind.

00:10:13.940 These mothers have their children out of wedlock.

00:10:16.460 They take from society, even though government benefits, even though they have government

00:10:21.660 benefits and put their own selfish desires ahead of the needs of the children.

00:10:26.740 Even the married mothers emotionally and verbally abuse their husbands, belittling their efforts

00:10:32.840 and airing out all of their marital and personal business on social media.

00:10:36.560 So this Mother's Day, let's look at some of these mothers, the mothers that paint the picture

00:10:42.040 of how awful modern mothers are in 2025.

00:10:44.820 This will be a call in show.

00:10:46.820 So I'm going to drop you a link and you can share any stories of how awful your mother was

00:10:51.740 to you.

00:10:52.080 Or maybe you would have seen it.

00:10:53.080 Right.

00:10:53.280 You can tell me that, too.

00:10:55.100 Society is not afraid to hold fathers accountable for their shortcomings, but they have yet

00:10:59.840 to do so with mothers.

00:11:01.440 I hope that one day mothers will be held to the level of scrutiny that fathers have had

00:11:06.800 to endure.

00:11:07.420 Is it going to happen?

00:11:09.760 I'm not going to hold my breath.

00:11:11.300 But hey, you never know.

00:11:12.580 You never know.

00:11:13.220 All right.

00:11:15.020 So number one, my abusive mother text.

00:11:18.000 OK, well, we're going to do the first one.

00:11:20.680 My abusive mother texted me this morning.

00:11:23.380 Let's break down her message, shall we?

00:11:25.800 Just thinking about you.

00:11:27.300 I hope you're doing well.

00:11:28.520 I think about you every day.

00:11:30.680 I just don't know how to talk to you.

00:11:32.200 I feel like anything I say, no matter how positive my intentions are interpreted as negative.

00:11:38.020 I can't change your perception.

00:11:39.840 I can only tell you that I have always wanted the best for you.

00:11:43.700 Anything I've done that has been hurtful was just me being a stupid human.

00:11:49.600 My intentions for you or for your life have always been for you to be happy and successful,

00:11:56.540 whatever that means for you.

00:11:58.340 All right, let's break this down line by line.

00:12:01.100 She starts off with a couple of lines to create a sense of closeness and like familiarity

00:12:06.420 and then goes right into, I don't know how to talk to you.

00:12:10.240 This is the woman who has emotionally abused and neglected me and medically neglected me

00:12:16.400 for my whole life.

00:12:18.180 The reason I don't talk to her is because any amount of information that I give her,

00:12:23.160 good or bad, will be used to tear me down.

00:12:26.380 That's why I gray rock her and why I give her nothing and why most of the time I just

00:12:29.960 don't respond to her.

00:12:31.120 This whole message is also a really good example of Darbo.

00:12:33.980 Already, she has placed herself in the role of the victim, the mother who is trying so

00:12:39.600 hard.

00:12:40.260 Block her.

00:12:40.780 I don't know why you guys don't block your moms.

00:12:42.640 It's such an easy fix.

00:12:44.660 Don't ever have to hear from her.

00:12:45.780 Just block.

00:12:46.260 Hard to reach her child.

00:12:47.520 And just no matter what she does, it's always wrong.

00:12:51.200 Even though historically she has been the person who has all of the power in this relationship.

00:12:54.520 And no matter how hard I tried, the goalposts were consistently moving.

00:12:58.440 I won't lie.

00:12:59.040 The daughter seems pretty insufferable too.

00:13:01.180 But yeah, just block her.

00:13:03.320 Move on.

00:13:03.860 Don't be angry.

00:13:04.740 Just move on with your life.

00:13:05.880 And what I tried to achieve was never enough.

00:13:08.440 This is projection.

00:13:09.600 Anything I say, no matter how positive my intentions are interpreted as negative.

00:13:14.820 This woman has never given me a genuine apology in my life that I can think of that did not

00:13:20.340 involve placing herself as the victim and guilt tripping me.

00:13:25.500 I don't even think you can call this an apology.

00:13:27.920 I've always wanted the best for you.

00:13:29.600 Again, she's the good guy in this scenario.

00:13:32.100 Anything I've done that has been hurtful was just me being a stupid human.

00:13:37.280 She knows.

00:13:38.400 She knows that she's fucked up.

00:13:40.100 She knows that I'm hurt.

00:13:41.020 She knows because I've tried to tell her for years and she refuses to accept responsibility.

00:13:45.480 This is the closest that I will get.

00:13:47.260 And she is still framing herself as the sympathetic party here.

00:13:50.400 My intentions for your life have always been for you to be happy and successful.

00:13:55.380 Whatever that looks like.

00:13:57.380 Oh, she loves that line.

00:13:58.720 She loves the happy and successful.

00:14:00.960 Her version of whatever my happy and successful looks like is pressuring me and guilting me and

00:14:08.220 scaring me into her version of my best life and then saying it's for my own good.

00:14:13.920 It's privately downplaying and discouraging any kind of accomplishments that I make, but

00:14:18.040 then publicly using my success as like a trophy to parade around.

00:14:23.560 It's continually disregarding my interests and my needs and pushing me for a life that would

00:14:30.000 be more beneficial for her socially.

00:14:32.860 This is a beautifully crafted piece of passive aggressive manipulation that sounds kind.

00:14:39.560 When in actuality, she is an abuser who talks shit about me to the entire family behind

00:14:45.060 my back.

00:14:45.620 Yeah, that's how women do it.

00:14:48.880 They ruin your reputation.

00:14:50.480 We can't use verbal violence.

00:14:51.960 So women will just spread rumors, over exaggerate things and really overreact.

00:14:56.760 That's the, that's how women do it.

00:14:58.980 That's how they get their way.

00:14:59.920 Because I openly talk about the abuse.

00:15:01.560 She cannot accept it.

00:15:03.240 She won't own up to it.

00:15:04.580 And she will never say sorry to my face.

00:15:06.840 All I want, all I want.

00:15:09.620 Impossible.

00:15:10.680 And proof that she is trying.

00:15:13.360 That's it.

00:15:14.320 That is the cost for her to be in my life.

00:15:16.140 And that will never happen.

00:15:17.480 She wants the benefits of having access to me, but she doesn't actually want to put in

00:15:21.500 the work to make it a relationship that is mutually beneficial.

00:15:25.140 I, I don't even know if I'm going to respond or what I'm going to say.

00:15:31.540 To her messages like these are so exhausting.

00:15:35.300 There's no one else I can talk to in my family, because if I bring it up and I show them this

00:15:39.660 message, there's the plausible deniability of, well, look, she's saying if she hurt you,

00:15:44.520 like she's, she's trying to reach out to you.

00:15:46.980 She's trying to make a bridge.

00:15:48.280 And it's like, no, she's trying to get me to reach out to her without her having to

00:15:54.260 change at all.

00:15:54.940 Don't we just love emotionally immature, abusive parents?

00:15:58.540 Yay.

00:15:59.620 Yeah.

00:16:00.540 She's the same.

00:16:02.080 They're the same, but.

00:16:04.240 Okay.

00:16:04.840 A single mother put a kid in the trash.

00:16:09.860 Detective Paris that you, you asked that the baby was okay.

00:16:16.400 Why'd you ask him that?

00:16:17.820 Oh my gosh.

00:16:29.380 She threw that kid in the trash and they said, well, why'd you do that?

00:16:33.100 Or why'd you say that?

00:16:34.200 And then she's like, with or without the incident.

00:16:37.520 Um, he's still, oh, I thought he still, I thought she said he still might have been hurt.

00:16:43.180 No, she, he's still mine.

00:16:45.780 Bitch, you don't give a shit about this kid.

00:16:47.580 You threw it in the trash.

00:16:48.560 Her baby into a trash bin testifies about leaving him in the January cold last year.

00:16:53.740 Good evening.

00:16:54.560 Thank you.

00:16:54.920 Oh my God.

00:16:55.960 Karen and Abner are on assignment tonight.

00:16:58.280 The trial does continue in New Mexico for Alexis Avila, who is facing charges of attempted first

00:17:03.540 degree murder and child endangerment causing bodily harm.

00:17:07.280 She took the stand today to speak in her own defense in January of last year.

00:17:11.140 Security camera footage caught her tossing a bag into a large trash bin, trash bin, and

00:17:16.580 then driving off.

00:17:17.980 Almost six hours later, dumpster divers heard cries and found the discarded infant.

00:17:25.160 Medical experts testified yesterday on the child's condition after his rescue and said

00:17:29.940 it is very likely he would have died from the extreme hypothermia if he had not been found.

00:17:35.220 How many babies are thrown in dumpsters and not found every year?

00:17:38.620 Dark question, isn't it?

00:17:42.500 Do you understand how your actions affected the babies?

00:17:47.440 Yes.

00:17:48.920 And what do you think of that?

00:17:50.940 I don't think that hurts.

00:17:52.640 That's something that he's never going to forget.

00:17:56.100 That's something that's going to live with him for the rest of his life.

00:17:59.980 You know what's so crazy?

00:18:01.520 You know you can leave babies at fire stations?

00:18:03.760 Like, why do they choose to throw it in a dumpster instead of a fire station?

00:18:10.700 Avila pleaded not guilty last year.

00:18:12.980 If convicted, she faces at least...

00:18:14.180 My mother claimed $100,000 in my name and now I got to deal with it.

00:18:17.660 It started when I was 12.

00:18:18.740 I'm 20 plus.

00:18:19.760 Holy crap.

00:18:21.260 Call in.

00:18:21.860 Tell your story.

00:18:22.500 18 years in prison.

00:18:23.960 We'll have live coverage of this trial from Lovington tomorrow.

00:18:26.720 She'll get off on good behavior.

00:18:31.300 Baby dies when a mother goes on vacation.

00:18:33.500 She was always happy, always...

00:18:36.240 Hold up.

00:18:37.300 Oh my God.

00:18:38.360 Okay, sorry.

00:18:40.320 Let's go here.

00:18:42.400 She was always happy, always playing and smiling and laughing.

00:18:47.760 Pictures and happy memories.

00:18:49.600 That's all neighbors have of 16-month-old Jailene Calendario.

00:18:53.560 I absolutely loved her.

00:18:54.880 She was like a little sister to me.

00:18:56.600 Sulem and her mom, Iris, didn't want to show their faces.

00:18:59.700 They said the first time they met Jailene was last August.

00:19:02.940 They were supposed to watch her only a few days,

00:19:05.600 but they said her mom didn't return for a month and a half.

00:19:09.000 I was the one calling her, look, I need milk, I need money.

00:19:11.860 I don't have no money to buy milk for you, baby.

00:19:13.940 What am I supposed to do?

00:19:15.060 Fast forward to this month and Christelle Calendario is charged with her daughter Jailene's murder.

00:19:20.840 Court documents show the 31-year-old admitted to leaving her baby home alone June 8th

00:19:25.760 while she went on vacation to Puerto Rico and Detroit.

00:19:28.720 When Calendario returned home eight days later, police say she found Jailene unresponsive.

00:19:34.860 We were absolutely heartbroken.

00:19:37.040 We loved Jailene a lot.

00:19:38.860 Iris and Sulem wish Calendario would have asked them to watch Jailene.

00:19:42.820 I wish for her to pay what she did to her daughter.

00:19:45.080 Instead, they're left with an investigation and reminders of Jailene's many visits.

00:19:51.720 Jailene really didn't deserve what happened to her.

00:19:54.100 She was amazing and really adorable, and I miss her a lot.

00:20:01.220 Wow, that's devastating.

00:20:03.880 And they keep pushing that women love their kids.

00:20:07.180 They don't.

00:20:08.020 They do not.

00:20:08.900 They love...

00:20:09.660 I guess this video is not available.

00:20:11.620 They love the clout their kids get.

00:20:14.480 They love...

00:20:14.880 I mean, even...

00:20:15.900 Even Candace Owens today.

00:20:20.600 She's like, you know...

00:20:22.440 I saw her Twitter, and she posted a picture of her baby, right?

00:20:25.300 She sent another kid.

00:20:26.720 And I'm thinking, Candace, you're in fucking politics.

00:20:29.940 Are you insane?

00:20:31.700 Are you mad?

00:20:32.420 You're posting pictures of your kids when you're in politics?

00:20:36.660 I'm like, these women do not care about their kids.

00:20:44.280 Political...

00:20:45.000 People go...

00:20:45.800 Like, they try to...

00:20:47.500 Anyways.

00:20:48.840 My mother told me that she owned my body.

00:20:50.840 She could do whatever she wanted to it whenever she wanted to it, and there was nothing that

00:20:54.140 I could do about it.

00:20:55.160 Whenever I was born, I was the only one out of my siblings with brown hair and bright

00:20:58.980 blue eyes.

00:20:59.600 The rest of my siblings were born with blonde hair and bright blue eyes.

00:21:02.800 Growing up, she always made sure to remind me that she told God she wanted a baby with

00:21:08.500 brown hair and bright blue eyes, and he finally blessed her with that by giving her me.

00:21:14.420 However, she always resented me.

00:21:16.120 I was the black sheep of the family, the scapegoat.

00:21:18.740 She always made sure to make that known.

00:21:21.740 Because she was my mom, I always seek validation from her, so I wanted blonde hair exactly like

00:21:26.880 my sisters, since she liked them more than me.

00:21:29.780 It was my junior year.

00:21:30.780 My big sister had already moved out of the house, and she was living with a friend.

00:21:34.040 One day, I was at my sister's house.

00:21:35.500 We got the bright idea to give me highlights, except we really didn't know exactly what

00:21:40.180 we were doing.

00:21:40.960 We took the little highlight cap that you pulled hair through.

00:21:43.680 We pulled the majority of my hair through this cap.

00:21:46.640 My hair ended up looking like a strawberry blonde color.

00:21:49.360 To be honest, it was not that bad.

00:21:51.600 Here's a picture of it right here.

00:21:53.660 Wasn't terrible at all.

00:21:55.000 We didn't realize how much hair that we colored of mine, though.

00:21:58.060 We thought it was going to be a subtle difference, and you weren't going to be able to tell.

00:22:01.340 When we were finished, I made sure to put my hair up in a ponytail, and my sister took

00:22:05.740 me home.

00:22:06.360 I got home and ran through the front door and tried to get to my room before my mother

00:22:09.720 saw my hair, but she did see it as I walked into the front door.

00:22:13.180 She made sure to let me know that I was so ugly now, that this was her body, and she had

00:22:19.200 rights to do whatever I wanted to it.

00:22:21.100 I did something to her body that I was not allowed to do.

00:22:25.200 She said the only thing that ever made me pretty was my brown hair.

00:22:28.180 Now that that was gone, I no longer had any value.

00:22:31.260 After that, I just went to my room and I cried, believing that I really was ugly, and

00:22:35.720 that my brown hair was the only reason why people liked me and thought that I was pretty

00:22:39.460 at all.

00:22:40.100 When I went to school and people pointed it out, that something had changed about my

00:22:43.880 hair or even complimented it, I would be sure to say, oh yeah, it's really messed up.

00:22:48.720 I didn't do this on purpose.

00:22:50.360 It looks horrible.

00:22:51.540 I know.

00:22:52.460 I said that every single time someone even complimented it.

00:22:55.240 I really believed that I was so ugly with this hair, made me hate everything about myself.

00:23:01.480 Of course, now I know that my hair color does not define me.

00:23:04.740 Just because she told me as a kid that my brown hair was the only reason I had value

00:23:09.660 to her, I really don't even color my hair brown anymore.

00:23:12.700 I make sure to keep it blonde most of the time.

00:23:15.160 At least that's the reason I think I like it blonde a lot.

00:23:18.160 My mother always made it a point to make sure I knew that she owned my body and I had no

00:23:23.360 rights to it.

00:23:24.280 Still to this day, I struggle with my self-image issues, but for the most part, I have overcome

00:23:28.580 them.

00:23:29.100 I refuse to allow her to have any more control over me.

00:23:31.800 They'll come back at 35.

00:23:33.520 Don't worry, lady.

00:23:35.580 You might have overcome them for now.

00:23:37.360 They'll be back.

00:23:38.340 My body any longer.

00:23:39.700 I own my own body and I'm not going to let anyone else tell me different ever again.

00:23:44.140 Just because you birthed someone does not mean that you have.

00:23:46.920 Mothers are especially mean to their daughter.

00:23:49.120 Women do not like their daughters, especially when the daughters become like prettier and

00:23:53.340 get more attention than them.

00:23:55.420 And if the dad likes the daughter more than the wife, oof, cooked, so cooked, done.

00:24:00.580 Um, all right.

00:24:02.300 Mother shoots daughter in the neck and then tells her to lie about it.

00:24:06.120 No bond for the Maryland mother accused her trying to kill her own daughter.

00:24:14.620 The suspect, Talika Brown, will stay in jail.

00:24:16.560 And today, new evidence suggests she tried to manipulate what her daughter told authorities.

00:24:21.520 Lili Zhang's on the story tonight.

00:24:22.640 She's standing by live with those details.

00:24:24.380 Lili.

00:24:24.520 Hey, Jim.

00:24:27.400 Good evening to you.

00:24:28.500 Prosecutors are pointing to a voicemail that was turned over to their office before today's

00:24:33.420 hearing, just hours beforehand.

00:24:35.700 In that voicemail, we are told that the suspect sent it to the child's father, essentially saying

00:24:41.540 that if their child does not make a statement, doesn't show up in court, that all this will,

00:24:46.080 quote, go away.

00:24:47.760 That was concerning to the state because, obviously, with her being 13 years old, she's very impressionable.

00:24:52.400 And that's our concern is that it's her mother.

00:24:55.960 She's going to listen to her mother.

00:24:57.240 And so we don't want her to be tainted in any way by the pressure.

00:25:04.420 Ashley Souls is an assistant state's attorney for Prince George's County.

00:25:08.340 She presented the case before a judge today, arguing that Talika Brown was a danger to the

00:25:13.360 community and should not be released on bond.

00:25:16.340 Brown is accused of shooting her 13-year-old daughter in the neck on Monday.

00:25:20.760 This was after authorities say an argument turned physical in their Seat Pleasant home.

00:25:25.460 Charging documents say Brown initially told her daughter to claim that she was shot by someone

00:25:30.840 who broke into the home.

00:25:32.580 The 13-year-old, according to prosecutors, remains in the hospital today.

00:25:36.560 She requires a chest tube right now, with doctors at one point fearing that paralysis

00:25:42.000 was a possibility.

00:25:43.460 And while no one thinks that a mother would shoot her very own daughter, no one can conceive

00:25:55.520 of that.

00:25:56.480 These incidents do happen.

00:25:58.680 And they happen for a variety of reasons.

00:26:01.020 Um, but our goal is to prevent these incidents from becoming tragedies, to begin to address

00:26:08.500 those underlying issues that lead to this type of violence.

00:26:12.100 Now, in court today, a defense attorney for Brown tried to make the argument that, in his opinion,

00:26:19.620 home detention would be more appropriate in this case.

00:26:22.700 He says that Brown has no violent criminal history.

00:26:25.620 Also adding that, in this case, the victim could stay with her father.

00:26:29.440 The judge, of course, in this case did side with the state.

00:26:32.680 All right, Pearl Reed, if you guys have a question, comment, concern, you can go to theaudacitynetwork.com

00:26:44.220 and, um, put Pearl Reed in front.

00:26:46.780 When we say the word deadbeat, we automatically picture a man.

00:26:49.600 What is the equivalent word of a deadbeat mother?

00:26:51.780 There isn't one, and that's a problem.

00:26:54.380 Um, totally, um, that is disgusting.

00:27:01.440 And this is the thing.

00:27:02.420 We don't talk about these issues.

00:27:05.700 It's always, women are far worse to their kids than men.

00:27:12.380 I'm gonna refresh.

00:27:13.320 I don't see one on the YouTube site.

00:27:16.620 Okay.

00:27:17.480 I don't love my mother.

00:27:18.720 And whenever I make that statement, it ignites.

00:27:21.500 I don't love my mother.

00:27:22.260 I don't love my mother.

00:27:23.240 But I thought, I thought the women in their seventies were like so much better.

00:27:27.140 Now, women have always been women.

00:27:28.560 Okay.

00:27:29.600 The men have not had as much opportunity.

00:27:32.520 Women don't, don't get this idea that women were different in the past.

00:27:36.900 And whenever I make that statement, it ignites a ton of people and a ton of judgment.

00:27:42.640 She brought you into this world.

00:27:44.860 You know, I owe her gratitude.

00:27:47.040 I owe her love.

00:27:49.920 When the fact of the matter is she owed me safety.

00:27:53.240 And nurturing and love this little girl, the only thing she ever experienced in connection

00:28:01.360 to her mother.

00:28:02.620 The only thing I ever experienced in connection to my mother was anxiety, fear, and absolute terror.

00:28:11.700 And that was the result of the emotional violence, the emotional abuse that she perpetrated against

00:28:20.920 me.

00:28:22.080 So no, I don't love my mother because that's not what she grew between us.

00:28:28.160 And I wish I did.

00:28:30.620 And I wish she had.

00:28:32.780 Parents, not parents.

00:28:34.780 Dad's a, you know, if a dad's a F up, right?

00:28:37.020 If he wasn't the best dad, dads will admit it.

00:28:41.240 Do you know what I mean?

00:28:42.020 Like, have you ever talked to kind of a shit father?

00:28:44.380 Father, I have.

00:28:47.720 And they'll say, you know what?

00:28:49.100 I wasn't around much growing up.

00:28:52.400 They'll admit their faults and just say, well, yeah, you put food on the table.

00:28:56.240 I did the best I could.

00:28:57.500 I could have did it better, of course.

00:28:59.920 But mothers, it's like you do one criticism and it's like World War Three.

00:29:04.220 It really is.

00:29:05.700 It is truly World War Three.

00:29:06.920 Um, okay, let's see what's next.

00:29:14.420 My mother changed my diaper and therefore I should what?

00:29:18.340 Yeah.

00:29:18.720 The other thing about mothers, men have a child and know that the kid owes them nothing.

00:29:24.940 That it's your, you have zero until 18.

00:29:28.060 And once that kid is 18, that's your responsibility.

00:29:31.060 Okay.

00:29:32.540 I don't know why mothers, they just have a tendency to,

00:29:36.920 oh, I, but I gave birth to you, bitch.

00:29:42.300 You chose not to wear a condo.

00:29:45.960 Nobody made you, you chose not to go on birth control.

00:29:48.360 Nobody made you do that.

00:29:49.580 That was number one.

00:29:50.480 Number two, nobody, you could have given a kid up for adoption.

00:29:53.360 You didn't have to keep the kid.

00:29:54.680 The kid didn't ask to be here.

00:29:56.420 So the kid isn't indebted to you because that she raised it.

00:30:01.120 And so many times I'll hear these, like these moms and they'll just say,

00:30:04.760 oh, I raised you.

00:30:05.980 I changed your diapers.

00:30:08.740 And?

00:30:11.280 You were like, you as an adult made the decision to take on this responsibility.

00:30:16.440 Like, you know, I mean, I know a dog isn't the same thing.

00:30:19.900 Buy dog, die low.

00:30:20.800 You know, I already have a dog.

00:30:22.540 But, you know, if you buy a pet, you're actually, you can go to jail for not taking care of the pet.

00:30:31.520 Right?

00:30:32.300 There's no, like, societal gratitude that you're such a good person because you took on a pet.

00:30:38.520 Right?

00:30:38.720 Um, but somehow with kids, like we, we somehow think that they're like, that's why I always kind of make fun of these trad women that use their kids for clout.

00:30:51.040 And they post their kids on the internet, especially Twitter.

00:30:54.800 Okay.

00:30:54.960 There's some messed up people on Twitter, some messed up people that will, uh, there's pedophiles, there's creeps.

00:31:05.120 And yet all these trad con influencers, they just put their kids' face on the internet.

00:31:10.800 Now, look, I totally understand that sometimes you make mistakes, right?

00:31:16.360 Like, you know, when I first got on the internet, and I'll even, I'll even raise my hand, um, I did post way too much.

00:31:25.080 You know, there were just times where I would, you know, post, um, me and my family would do content.

00:31:33.440 Granted, everyone was older, right?

00:31:35.100 No one was like a baby.

00:31:37.000 And, um, it did backfire when I, I got into like controversial stuff and I kind of regretted putting that stuff online.

00:31:43.720 And I stopped, you know, unless sometimes my sister, if she wants to come on, but, you know, she's an adult, but I don't know why you would put like a kid, right?

00:31:54.980 Like the kid.

00:31:57.120 And I see, I see like wall, I see a lot of the daily wire people do this with their families and their spouse.

00:32:03.240 A lot of the trad cons.

00:32:04.320 It's like nobody at, like these people didn't ask to be in this political crazy world, you know?

00:32:11.420 So by putting them as part of your brand, you're kind of like, now you're putting the kid up for attack from all these people that hate you, right?

00:32:21.360 And the moms just say, fuck it, let's do it.

00:32:23.780 I need these clout points.

00:32:25.320 I need the, I need this clout.

00:32:29.180 Like, let me, I'm going to, before I go into this, I'm going to show you, uh, put it up for one sec.

00:32:36.280 Just put the screen off for one sec.

00:32:38.480 Oh, it's off.

00:32:38.960 Okay.

00:32:40.240 Okay.

00:32:40.640 Like, I saw this today.

00:32:46.380 There's another one.

00:32:48.480 Okay, I'll look in a second.

00:32:49.780 I saw this.

00:32:50.640 And everyone says I'm bitter, right?

00:32:52.900 And maybe, I don't know.

00:32:54.440 I don't think I'm bitter, but I'm a pretty positive person.

00:32:58.660 I can, you know, I talk a lot of shit on the internet, so it's totally fair.

00:33:03.100 I think maybe sometimes people don't understand my tone, but this is what I mean when I say a lot of these trad women are kind of frauds, because what do you do?

00:33:15.000 You're putting this baby's face on the internet already?

00:33:18.140 And they all do it.

00:33:19.620 All of them.

00:33:20.840 Here, like, this is one.

00:33:22.660 Let me go to Michaela Peterson's page.

00:33:24.800 She just did it again, too.

00:33:27.240 Michaela Peterson.

00:33:28.560 And I just, I keep thinking, like, is this a, this bitch is thirst trapping with her kid.

00:33:40.260 Bro, come on, you know what this is going to do to a guy's mind.

00:33:45.440 You know how men are, bitch.

00:33:49.460 I just, being realistic isn't being bitter, right?

00:33:55.960 And I thank God.

00:33:59.080 Oh, I thank God my mom didn't have Twitter back in the day.

00:34:01.900 I thank God, because her Facebook, I'll tell you what, her Facebook was, like, crazy.

00:34:07.080 Oh, my God.

00:34:07.920 I was all over it.

00:34:10.460 Oh, thank God.

00:34:11.400 But it was a private one.

00:34:12.460 Thank you, God.

00:34:13.460 But I just think, holy shit, if these people have Twitter, oh, my goodness.

00:34:21.020 And they just, they don't care.

00:34:22.540 They really don't care about their kids.

00:34:24.080 They're just, like, fuck it.

00:34:25.380 Let me get this clout.

00:34:27.580 Um, let me go back to this other video I was talking about with this nice blonde.

00:34:32.140 My mother changed my diaper, and therefore I should, what, love her?

00:34:36.920 She kind of didn't.

00:34:39.420 I'm sure she must have done it on occasion.

00:34:41.620 But just as a little FYI, one of the ways that my mother abused me was through neglect.

00:34:50.240 When I was born, I had a babysitter who was only 10 years old.

00:34:55.060 And her mother would come over with her, well, take her over, because she was only 10 years old.

00:35:00.600 And they would check on me after school every single day.

00:35:04.560 This is a story that my babysitter, who I still know, told me.

00:35:10.480 She said, we would come and check on you because we knew that your mother was not feeding you or changing you.

00:35:16.200 And when they would arrive and I would be in my crib playing, I was unchanged, unfed, not crying, already disassociating and self-soothing because of the fact that my mother actually did not change my diapers or feed me, for that matter.

00:35:36.080 Exactly.

00:35:41.120 Exactly.

00:35:41.740 And they're like, thanks for not murdering me.

00:35:47.200 Trigger warning, toxic abuse.

00:35:49.620 When I was 13, my mom...

00:35:51.280 And I think this is what men fear the most.

00:35:53.420 It's not really the money necessarily, right?

00:35:57.720 You know, money's part of it.

00:35:59.400 But no guy wants a fucked up kid, right?

00:36:03.000 No guy, like the guy will like say, you know what, take the money.

00:36:05.780 Men can be happy, like with a mattress on the floor of a one-bedroom apartment.

00:36:10.100 They're happy.

00:36:11.400 Women, we're so jealous of men's ability to be content.

00:36:15.420 Like, we'll look at them, they'll have a mattress on the floor.

00:36:19.120 And we'll still bang them, right?

00:36:22.120 That doesn't stop us.

00:36:23.560 But, you know, we'll look at this and say, how are you happy?

00:36:27.340 But men, they're fine.

00:36:28.380 They're like, take my money, whatever.

00:36:29.960 I don't care.

00:36:30.520 But no guy, like a guy would rather have no kid than a messed up kid.

00:36:40.520 Do you know what I mean?

00:36:41.180 Like, the guy would just rather have no kid at all than a kid that's going to be a terrible representative of him.

00:36:47.800 And he can't really stop that.

00:36:49.500 I mean, he can vet to see if the woman's crazy, but he doesn't know until he puts a baby in her.

00:36:53.800 Women, we lose our minds after we get that baby.

00:36:56.560 We're like, drunk on power.

00:36:59.040 We're like, yes, yes, I can use this kid.

00:37:02.780 I can weaponize this kid for the rest of my life.

00:37:06.260 I can.

00:37:11.200 And so it's not necessarily their fault.

00:37:15.220 But, you know, when women get that baby, that's when you see your true colors, you know.

00:37:19.020 Mom and dad got in an argument and they never really argued before.

00:37:22.480 So hit that like button, guys.

00:37:24.280 How the hell?

00:37:24.960 We got 500 people watching.

00:37:26.420 We need at least 400 likes.

00:37:28.280 A like is free, please.

00:37:29.860 You know, if you want.

00:37:30.980 You know, if you want.

00:37:31.460 I thought it was strange.

00:37:32.920 And maybe I just never saw them argue or heard them argue.

00:37:36.340 Boomers can be very sneaky.

00:37:38.620 So I asked my dad.

00:37:40.040 I was like, are you and mom going to get a divorce?

00:37:41.980 And he was like, no.

00:37:43.540 So a few days had passed, maybe a couple weeks.

00:37:45.820 I don't really remember.

00:37:47.500 My mom called me up to her room.

00:37:49.720 And my brother was there, too.

00:37:51.280 And that album was playing on the radio.

00:37:54.560 Her cassettes, whatever.

00:37:56.460 She said, I don't want you guys to worry or anything, but me and your dad are getting a divorce.

00:38:01.460 She said, I still love you.

00:38:03.620 Everything is going to be fine.

00:38:05.220 But I'm going to have you live with your dad.

00:38:07.680 And that is the day my life completely fucking changed.

00:38:11.280 I still don't have all the answers today.

00:38:13.420 But apparently my dad found a Polaroid of my mom at a rave with some guy.

00:38:18.320 Her friends were in the Polaroid, too.

00:38:20.300 So who knows?

00:38:21.500 But she ended up going to live with him.

00:38:24.900 And I lived with my dad.

00:38:26.040 And I had a boyfriend at the time.

00:38:27.900 And his parents were truck drivers.

00:38:29.880 And they were on the road all the time.

00:38:31.620 We had a huge house.

00:38:32.680 So my dad let my boyfriend live with us.

00:38:35.360 This is probably when we were like 15, 14.

00:38:38.480 Like, what the fuck are you thinking?

00:38:40.840 My dad was a workaholic.

00:38:42.280 And he bought our love for the most part.

00:38:44.980 He was very emotionally unavailable.

00:38:47.500 This is going to be a long one.

00:38:48.680 I apologize.

00:38:49.220 There might be multiple parts.

00:38:50.820 Who knows?

00:38:51.500 My dad was like a part owner of budget rent-a-car sales.

00:38:54.940 And he would buy a franchise, build it up, and sell it.

00:38:59.000 And we were rich.

00:39:01.180 Like, my dad would take me and my best friend to go get perms,

00:39:05.440 bath and body work, J.Crew, Banana Republic, all that crap.

00:39:11.300 I would go and visit my dad at work.

00:39:13.320 And his work buddies would give me $100 bills just to impress the boss.

00:39:17.980 And me and my best friend would be at the job.

00:39:20.060 And we'd be in, like, the garage with the cars.

00:39:22.620 And we'd be getting, like, high on helium.

00:39:25.920 I don't know if you can get high on helium.

00:39:27.400 We were playing with the damn shit.

00:39:29.220 Okay, back to seriousness.

00:39:31.120 So after a while, my boyfriend started to abuse me.

00:39:34.620 I doubt it.

00:39:35.660 I mean, it would go as far as him hitting me in the halls.

00:39:39.580 After you screamed in his face and antagonized him and verbally abused him, he probably hit back.

00:39:46.900 It's my guess.

00:39:48.920 It's my guess.

00:39:51.120 Tell the women trying to ruin my life.

00:39:52.460 I caught him watching Korn once.

00:39:55.180 And I was, like, 15.

00:39:56.660 I didn't understand what it was.

00:39:58.300 And it made me really uncomfortable.

00:40:00.920 And then later on, he cheated on me.

00:40:03.380 Got a girl pregnant.

00:40:04.900 We decided to move to Orlando.

00:40:07.820 And that was it.

00:40:09.200 I've talked about my mom on here before.

00:40:11.580 If you don't know, she had Crohn's disease.

00:40:13.960 She found out she had Crohn's disease in 1985.

00:40:17.720 I was five.

00:40:19.180 They didn't know what it was at first.

00:40:20.720 So she went into the hospital to have surgery.

00:40:23.880 And she woke up with an ostomy bag.

00:40:26.800 If you don't know what an ostomy bag is, it's basically you shit in a bag for the rest of your life.

00:40:30.940 At least for her.

00:40:32.500 Can you imagine being a young woman, go into surgery, and wake up?

00:40:36.520 Sorry, part two.

00:40:39.180 What a time.

00:40:41.780 All right.

00:40:42.320 So a woman's mother left her dad to go raving.

00:40:47.100 Woman is for it was the last one.

00:40:48.740 Woman is forced to go into work instead of be with her son.

00:40:52.200 The way that working moms are made to choose between their job and their children.

00:40:56.420 You should have married rich.

00:40:57.560 You're probably hot 10 years ago.

00:40:59.700 You know what I mean?

00:41:00.000 She's cute now, but like 10 years ago, but she was, should have married rich.

00:41:03.460 Really freaking infuriates me.

00:41:04.960 And let me just set the record straight now.

00:41:06.360 I will always, always choose my son over my bullshit little corporate job.

00:41:11.220 Yeah, how are you going to pay to lit?

00:41:12.920 How is he going to eat?

00:41:13.840 Somehow I was gaslit into having to go into the office today, which is not my normal day

00:41:19.260 that I go into the office.

00:41:20.260 So I go in today and tomorrow and my son had to miss school today and he will miss it again

00:41:26.380 tomorrow because no one can pick him up from school.

00:41:28.800 On top of that, I had to cancel two therapy sessions that he had today.

00:41:33.680 And every day as part of my job, I am reminded that these companies really don't give a damn

00:41:38.860 about you.

00:41:39.480 And even when they say that they value diversity and inclusion and they support working moms

00:41:43.640 and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

00:41:45.580 We have all learned so far that that is absolute nonsense and garbage.

00:41:50.100 And then to make things even worse, I have to drive an hour and 20 minutes to my office and

00:41:55.820 it's going to take me over two hours to get back home.

00:41:58.380 Which means I won't see my husband on his birthday until at least 7, 7.30 p.m. today.

00:42:05.660 How's your day going?

00:42:06.520 Yeah, like women complain about just doing basic things like working.

00:42:12.240 Like men, you know, single dads, they just never complain.

00:42:16.620 They just, they solve the problem.

00:42:18.960 They don't, they're not going to complain on the internet.

00:42:21.060 They're like, they don't, they know people don't care.

00:42:22.700 Nobody cares about your problem.

00:42:24.020 Nobody does.

00:42:25.120 Nobody.

00:42:26.340 Except me because, you know, I get paid to do this.

00:42:28.680 Thanks for keeping me employed, ladies.

00:42:30.320 Thank you.

00:42:30.760 Oh, my kid, someone on the website said, wait, in college, I was arrested for a DUI around

00:42:39.860 mom's weekend.

00:42:40.800 Cops were cool.

00:42:41.500 They were telling me how on mom's weekend, they have the most police calls because the

00:42:45.320 moms fight their daughters over men.

00:42:49.560 Wow.

00:42:51.580 That is.

00:42:54.140 Okay, let's see the next one.

00:42:57.040 The way that working moms are.

00:42:58.880 I watched that one already.

00:42:59.560 All right, a kid book tells kids about moms getting drunk and beating on men and the

00:43:05.020 women laugh about it.

00:43:07.160 Why Mommy Hits Daddy, Kid's Guide to Understanding Alcoholism.

00:43:14.540 Why Mommy Hits Daddy, Kid's Guide to Understanding Alcoholism by Brad Goss.

00:43:19.060 Imagine if this was the other way around.

00:43:21.520 Imagine if there was a book called Why Daddy Hits Mommy.

00:43:25.040 Oh, my gosh.

00:43:25.840 Mom comes home.

00:43:26.680 She doesn't expect much.

00:43:28.440 A clean bathroom.

00:43:29.560 And your father's gentle touch.

00:43:32.180 Even though your daddy works hard.

00:43:34.120 Really?

00:43:34.520 He's a fucking astronaut?

00:43:36.420 She expected him to clean the poops in the yard.

00:43:39.280 Mom looks rough.

00:43:40.320 And why?

00:43:41.260 What is with all?

00:43:41.720 See, that's called mom overreacting.

00:43:43.940 Right?

00:43:44.200 So this is a way women control you.

00:43:45.760 And I want you guys to understand this.

00:43:48.060 Women have a standard of clean that they have for a house.

00:43:51.600 House they don't pay for.

00:43:53.020 Right?

00:43:53.260 But, or maybe they go half and half.

00:43:55.380 But they make their neuroticism everyone else's problem.

00:43:59.940 So they get upset if somebody takes an extra egg.

00:44:04.320 They get upset if everything is important.

00:44:06.520 Now, I'm not saying to be a slob, right?

00:44:08.160 I mean, don't be disgusting.

00:44:09.280 But, it's not that they really care about the house being clean.

00:44:15.020 Because if they did, you could say, I'll do this and I'll stop nagging.

00:44:17.920 But they'll just find something else to nag about.

00:44:20.280 So that's why you just ignore.

00:44:22.620 Ignore forever.

00:44:23.120 Ignore all of the emotions of the poops.

00:44:25.460 Like, what is happening here?

00:44:26.960 Why is he so sad?

00:44:28.340 After mom starts drinking wine with your father, she draws the line.

00:44:32.560 This poor guy is never going to quit smoking with this bitch in his face.

00:44:36.240 Sorry, that was funny.

00:44:37.440 It's just, it's never going to happen.

00:44:39.520 Once mom takes a break to pee, God, I hate her.

00:44:42.180 Like, just her face.

00:44:43.160 Just a very punchable face.

00:44:46.300 You and your dad had better flee.

00:44:48.200 To the lawyer, you must go.

00:44:49.800 What is this pompadour hair?

00:44:51.900 Like, what is happening?

00:44:53.800 Before mom's anger plateaus.

00:44:56.800 And she beats your daddy with her fists.

00:44:59.460 Oh my God, where are her pupils?

00:45:03.380 Because she can't control her drunken fists.

00:45:06.560 Drinking is your mom's issue.

00:45:09.700 Now go and get your...

00:45:11.020 This is a fucked up book.

00:45:12.980 They give this to kids?

00:45:13.980 Dad, a tissue.

00:45:15.580 Oh my, imagine if they had the opposite.

00:45:18.260 They wouldn't.

00:45:19.580 They wouldn't.

00:45:20.680 All right.

00:45:21.740 When a mother emasculates the father.

00:45:24.700 When a mother emasculates the father, okay?

00:45:30.060 When a mother emasculates the father and there's children in the household and the children observe that and see that, that causes so much detriment to the children.

00:45:41.580 And I'll tell you why.

00:45:42.460 In a family, the mother plays the motherly feminine role, okay?

00:45:47.040 And then in a family, the father plays the fatherly masculine role.

00:45:50.140 I'm not saying that every father always shows up as a father or shows up as a masculine role.

00:45:55.160 But when a mother intentionally and deliberately emasculates the father, the children always grow up to a degree feeling confused about their sexual orientation, about their gender role, about their place in the world.

00:46:11.180 And I'm not talking about mothers that have a strong personality and have to play the father.

00:46:16.100 I'm not talking about that.

00:46:17.280 I'm talking about mothers that literally deliberately emasculate the father through, you know, putting them down or, you know, always trying to wear the pants and always grow up feeling confused about the gender roles within the family dynamic.

00:46:32.600 And then it causes them to feel confused about their role in their life, especially when it comes to their sexual orientation or their gender.

00:46:39.920 So when a mother is emasculating the father and putting him down and wearing the pants and being cruel and almost playing this power dynamic, it's so detrimental to the kids.

00:46:52.820 It does something so significantly detrimental to the children and it causes the family system to almost collapse.

00:47:00.240 And I say that through my own experience, okay?

00:47:03.280 Every time I've seen a family where the mother was almost playing the masculine energy and the father is playing, not the feminine energy, but is emasculated, doesn't feel like they can speak up, doesn't feel like they have a role in that dynamic.

00:47:18.180 The children always have a degree of confusion as they grow up because the parents are supposed to play these roles.

00:47:24.220 They're supposed to play the masculine.

00:47:25.640 They're supposed to play the feminine.

00:47:26.720 And when that doesn't happen, it causes confliction in the child and it causes a confliction in where the child places themselves in their world.

00:47:35.740 Yeah, that's true.

00:47:37.240 Okay.

00:47:38.260 A woman stabs ex-husband and kidnaps her kid.

00:47:43.320 Deputies say this woman showed up at her ex-husband.

00:47:45.760 Oh my God.

00:47:47.160 You guys think you're hooking up with this spicy Latina.

00:47:50.500 And you think, oh, it's going good.

00:47:53.480 I got this spicy Latina.

00:47:56.620 And then, yeah, you didn't look for the crazy eyes.

00:47:58.900 You didn't do it.

00:47:59.680 You guys got to look.

00:48:00.540 You got to look into the eyes and say, is she just jealous and spicy or is she batshit crazy?

00:48:06.600 And that's a tough line.

00:48:07.500 You guys got to pick.

00:48:09.280 And I think like sometimes girls will do things or women will do things.

00:48:12.440 And guys will look twice and be like, is she crazy or is she batshit?

00:48:19.940 Ex-husband's apartment and stabbed him.

00:48:22.800 She then took off with their daughters.

00:48:24.980 And it all went down Sunday night in Lake Mary on Greenstone Drive.

00:48:28.460 And that initiated an Amber Alert.

00:48:30.500 All three kids were tracked down this morning in Orlando.

00:48:33.800 Fox 35's Holly Briscoe.

00:48:35.020 Be careful, guys.

00:48:35.960 Look for the crazy eyes.

00:48:37.140 You might lose your life over it.

00:48:39.300 We are not playing games.

00:48:40.520 She doesn't look too spicy.

00:48:43.140 Well, like I bet when he met her, she was like, you could tell she used to be.

00:48:47.000 Latest, Holly.

00:48:49.560 Good evening.

00:48:50.360 Well, investigators tell me that they are still.

00:48:52.320 Does she have crazy eyes?

00:48:53.560 One in the chat if she does.

00:48:54.820 Two if she doesn't.

00:48:56.260 You got to judge this one.

00:48:57.280 We're going to listen.

00:48:58.240 Very early on in this investigation.

00:49:00.800 And one thing that they did want to make clear is that the children were not in the apartment when the victim was stabbed.

00:49:07.380 All right, Ms. Kelly, I reviewed your public defender application.

00:49:12.520 The last Kelly made her first appearance before a judge today.

00:49:15.920 Kelly is charged with attempted first-degree murder.

00:49:19.280 Investigators say she showed up at her ex-husband's Heathrow apartment and stabbed him several times late Sunday afternoon.

00:49:27.480 I do find probable cause to hold you.

00:49:30.140 Neighbors in this quiet complex shocked by the whole ordeal.

00:49:33.760 But he's a nice man, yeah.

00:49:34.960 FDLE put out a missing child alert after the stabbing, saying that Kelly was on the run with her two daughters and was to be considered armed and dangerous.

00:49:43.900 Hey, I didn't say it was your fault for dating crazy.

00:49:46.040 You can't always tell.

00:49:48.180 Someone said, oh, but Pearl's blaming.

00:49:49.780 I'm just saying try to avoid it if you can.

00:49:52.860 It's like, goddamn.

00:49:54.020 Orlando police saw.

00:49:55.220 Yeah, I'm taking calls in a bit.

00:49:56.680 Last Kelly on Selena's drive around 120 this morning and arrested her.

00:50:00.540 Investigators say her girls were with her and were not harmed.

00:50:03.940 Court records show the ex filed for divorce in September 2020.

00:50:08.420 The divorce finalized in December.

00:50:10.620 A neighbor says the ex lived in the complex for about a year and they'd never seen or heard of his ex-wife, DeLast Kelly, before.

00:50:17.940 It's a little bit scary.

00:50:21.600 And investigators tell me that the victim is listed in critical condition at the hospital.

00:50:27.200 According to the incident report, doctors told investigators they've already performed one surgery on the victim and they expect him to undergo several more.

00:50:38.880 For now, reporting live in.

00:50:40.200 Holy crap.

00:50:42.960 Insane.

00:50:43.440 Okay, now we have another woman becoming a single mother.

00:50:46.740 Then we're going to take callers.

00:50:47.840 If you want to put the link in the chat, you guys can hop on right now.

00:50:53.920 Today's a hard, it's been a hard morning.

00:50:59.200 Becoming a solo single parent is difficult.

00:51:06.080 So, it's only been two days.

00:51:09.780 But it's still been hard.

00:51:11.780 I think the thing that makes it tough.

00:51:13.760 It's time to beg.

00:51:14.560 Beg for him back.

00:51:15.640 That does work.

00:51:16.480 Just so you guys know, I'm not going to say who.

00:51:21.760 A certain somebody said after watching my show, his wife apologized.

00:51:29.980 There's nothing like with me mentioning there's 22-year-olds and he could do better to get your wife on her best behavior.

00:51:37.540 Just show her my clip.

00:51:39.500 Hey, if he got you, if he got you, he can get 10 years hotter than you if you're a six, right?

00:51:46.400 Let's help.

00:51:47.580 Or let's say you're really hot.

00:51:49.000 You're an eight.

00:51:50.160 Well, if he got you, right, that means all the younger eights are going to see that he's with you and the other eights.

00:51:58.140 And boom, now he can smash them too.

00:52:03.080 It's like, it's not really fair.

00:52:05.760 And you just do worse.

00:52:07.080 Unless you got some real girl game, but let's be honest, most of us don't.

00:52:13.280 Not much, anyways.

00:52:16.060 No, no, no, not Rachel.

00:52:18.400 Yeah, I'll just say that.

00:52:19.680 So, yeah, lady, if I were you, I would start begging, blowing, and cooking.

00:52:25.880 Or if you got money for Uber Eats or something, you know, maybe buy him a present.

00:52:30.660 It's time.

00:52:31.140 It's time to treat him like a king and put the crazy away.

00:52:33.880 What's the hardest, though, is the reality, like sinking in.

00:52:38.180 You know, at first, like your body is kind of in shock.

00:52:42.300 Stop crying and start lying.

00:52:44.720 Say, baby, you're the best I ever had.

00:52:48.260 Start gassing up.

00:52:49.500 Look it.

00:52:49.800 There's three things, really.

00:52:53.340 Men lie to us, too.

00:52:54.660 So, before you guys virtue signal, please stop virtue signaling to me and saying, like,

00:53:01.500 men don't want to be lied to to some extent, right?

00:53:05.180 Women, like, when we say, tell me the truth.

00:53:08.520 And you're like, I can't tell you the truth, you bitch.

00:53:10.780 Like, you know, you guys are like, I tried that, and you guys are crazy.

00:53:15.000 You guys can't handle it.

00:53:16.620 Well, women, it's like, we can't.

00:53:19.600 So, men, when they lie to us, they say things like, I'm not cheating.

00:53:25.740 There's no other women.

00:53:27.600 I'll never leave.

00:53:28.840 Not even if, you know.

00:53:31.000 No, your friend isn't that hot.

00:53:33.180 No, your friend, you're not.

00:53:34.120 I don't want to smash your friend.

00:53:35.760 I don't.

00:53:36.240 They might say, you're the most beautiful woman in the world.

00:53:44.540 No, I didn't notice you gained weight, right?

00:53:48.000 So, those are some lies that men tell us to make us feel better.

00:53:50.860 Now, women, you know, the lies that women tell are, my body count is two, or one, or three,

00:53:59.040 whatever number she's, it's under 10, right?

00:54:01.620 That's what women say, number one.

00:54:03.380 Number two, what women say is, they say, like, you're the best I ever had.

00:54:11.360 You're so strong.

00:54:13.380 What should we do, baby?

00:54:15.020 You know.

00:54:15.780 So, there's ways that women, you know, manipulate men, and men manipulate women.

00:54:21.300 So, like, what I would suggest to her is whatever, you know, because men, they have a couple things

00:54:26.400 that kind of, like, men are really proud of, right?

00:54:29.720 Like, physique, being really intelligent.

00:54:32.800 You know, all men want to feel smart.

00:54:38.520 Being, like, good dad.

00:54:40.540 You know, there's a lot of things.

00:54:41.820 Bringing home the money depends on the guy.

00:54:44.120 Every guy's different, right?

00:54:45.660 But I would start begging, you know.

00:54:47.520 I would start begging, saying, please, I'll change.

00:54:49.740 And, you know, men do respond to, I mean, because men, here's the thing.

00:54:54.960 Most men, lies don't work on me.

00:54:58.160 Well, they work on enough men that, you know, porn stars are getting married.

00:55:02.360 I don't know what to tell you.

00:55:04.000 So, this lady, what I personally would recommend is, yeah, tell him you're going to change.

00:55:10.120 I mean, that's obviously a lie.

00:55:13.680 Tell, start complimenting him based on whatever he's, like, good at.

00:55:17.260 Start, you know, trying to change your behavior.

00:55:20.960 Really good gluck, gluck.

00:55:22.460 I would, I'd start, you know, but, you know, because most men, they've never gotten an apology before.

00:55:26.860 Not really.

00:55:27.640 Not a real one.

00:55:28.900 Not, maybe she could try, I'm sorry.

00:55:32.440 Is there anything I could do to make this right?

00:55:35.260 How many times do you think a man's heard that ever?

00:55:38.940 Ever, never.

00:55:40.520 It might happen.

00:55:41.960 Yeah.

00:55:43.000 I would never marry a woman with kids.

00:55:44.840 She's not getting him back.

00:55:46.260 Men are done with the rubber banding.

00:55:47.940 Look, I, I, all I'm saying is it's worth a shot.

00:55:53.180 I'm not saying it's going to work, but, hey, you know, it's, it's worth, like, it's worth a good old try.

00:56:00.260 You know, have you guys ever, like, fumbled a girl, right?

00:56:04.220 But you kind of send a Hail Mary text to just see, you know, you're like, I mean, I think this is over.

00:56:09.780 But, hey, I want, I'm going to try to smack, let's just, let's just try it.

00:56:14.500 Yeah.

00:56:14.940 So, I think, I think, um, I think, you know, she should, true, gluck, gluck is important.

00:56:26.100 Yeah, I mean, I think she should give it a good old college try.

00:56:30.520 I mean, what's the worst that can happen?

00:56:33.700 She's already a single mother.

00:56:35.180 As the days progress, it kind of, your body starts to realize that, okay, this is happening.

00:56:41.780 And then your mind starts to react.

00:56:44.600 Um, another hard part of it is the logistics of everything.

00:56:48.280 A true apology has three parts.

00:56:50.460 I'm sorry, it was my fault.

00:56:51.940 How can I make things right?

00:56:56.240 Said no woman ever in all of human history.

00:57:00.520 You guys are funny.

00:57:02.540 She could try.

00:57:04.040 When you have a baby, there's...

00:57:05.760 Yeah, you got to take off the bonnet, you know, take off the glasses, put some makeup on.

00:57:09.880 Men say they don't like makeup.

00:57:11.060 Yeah, they do.

00:57:11.860 They do.

00:57:12.960 Maybe get a boob job.

00:57:14.600 I mean, your tits are probably, like, to your, you know, down because you just had a kid.

00:57:19.500 Yeah.

00:57:20.000 Yeah, I mean, I'm not saying this is moral.

00:57:22.040 I'm saying it's, I'm trying to be pragmatic here.

00:57:24.020 Two parents, and if both parents are good parents, which me and my son's dad were both

00:57:30.060 good parents, you then have to figure out a middle ground.

00:57:34.260 And then that means that there's going to be times when your baby is possibly not with

00:57:40.020 you.

00:57:40.820 My baby is so young.

00:57:42.840 Yeah, I would, I would delete your TikTok.

00:57:44.480 It's probably why you're a single mother.

00:57:46.100 He probably dumped you over this.

00:57:47.200 So, it's, it's like hitting me hard.

00:57:51.020 I would have never expected or wanted this.

00:57:53.940 Okay.

00:57:54.660 So, now we're going to take callers, okay?

00:57:58.020 So, we have a couple questions, and you guys are welcome to answer any of these questions.

00:58:02.020 But please, we really want to keep it to four minutes or less.

00:58:04.660 So, I'm not trying to be rude if I cut you guys off.

00:58:09.360 It's just, I got to move on, you know.

00:58:12.240 I want to take so many callers as I can.

00:58:13.900 Um, the other thing, so, I want to ask, what behaviors did your mother exhibit that were

00:58:21.660 toxic?

00:58:22.900 Have you ever confronted your mother about any of her behaviors?

00:58:26.900 And what is the worst thing you saw your mother do growing up, either to you or somebody

00:58:31.560 else?

00:58:33.180 I would love to hear your mother's story.

00:58:35.100 So, come on.

00:58:36.440 Please don't start with a, I love your show, da, da, da.

00:58:39.940 It's really nice.

00:58:41.140 I'm really happy you guys watch.

00:58:42.620 I don't want you to think I'm taking it for granted.

00:58:45.360 But we do this show to get to the stories, right?

00:58:49.100 I love hearing your stories.

00:58:50.620 So, please, beginning, middle, and end.

00:58:53.760 And tell me your story, starting with Doug MPA.

00:58:59.460 Hey, Pearl.

00:59:00.060 How you doing?

00:59:00.720 I'm good.

00:59:01.360 How are you?

00:59:02.680 See, you guys know my story.

00:59:04.620 If you've been listening to pro shows long enough, you know, my mother was the worst person

00:59:08.820 in my life up until my mid-30s.

00:59:10.980 And then my parents got divorced.

00:59:13.520 She started living by herself, started going to therapy, and she apologized for all the

00:59:18.280 horrible things that she did to her three kids.

00:59:21.120 And she, since I was 36 years old, she spent her whole life after that trying to make up

00:59:29.340 for her being so terrible.

00:59:30.900 Now, what would she do?

00:59:32.140 My mom, I don't like when women say this, but it's the only way that I can describe her.

00:59:38.680 My mom was just verbally and emotionally abusive.

00:59:41.680 Like, she would literally say the worst things and just make the house uncomfortable.

00:59:45.440 And then when I was young, I mean, she'd whoop my ass and it just, it was just terrible.

00:59:52.980 So I consider myself fortunate that I'm on the other side of that because my mom is great

00:59:57.280 now, but she, she had to go to therapy and fix all that stuff.

01:00:00.080 And I know a lot of people who, whose mothers will never apologize, will never take accountability

01:00:06.900 and make you feel like you're wrong when they were the scumbags.

01:00:10.140 That's too many mothers in America are scumbags.

01:00:13.940 And, and I, I put this in the audacity chat.

01:00:17.600 I said, when you think of the term deadbeat, you automatically think of a man, like a father,

01:00:24.540 a insufficient father.

01:00:26.100 What is the term for that with a mother?

01:00:29.900 There isn't, there isn't one.

01:00:31.600 We don't have one yet.

01:00:32.640 It's just like, what would you come up with?

01:00:34.260 What would you say?

01:00:35.820 I'll have to think about it and try to come up with it.

01:00:37.800 It's just a shame that we don't have it.

01:00:39.500 Yeah.

01:00:40.120 Yeah.

01:00:40.420 We could make it.

01:00:41.220 We'll think we'll put our heads together and try to figure something out.

01:00:44.400 It's just like the term loser.

01:00:46.700 When you think of a loser, you think of a guy eating Cheetos in his mom's basement, playing

01:00:50.720 video games.

01:00:51.640 What is the equivalent of the word loser for a woman?

01:00:57.460 We don't have one yet.

01:00:59.520 And that's a problem in society, Pearl.

01:01:01.840 It totally is.

01:01:03.600 Um, so I'm going to let in.

01:01:06.220 I'm going to let in Leo.

01:01:10.760 Yes.

01:01:11.180 Hi.

01:01:11.660 What is the.

01:01:12.720 Turn off the YouTube in the background.

01:01:14.900 You're good.

01:01:15.180 There you go.

01:01:15.460 Sorry.

01:01:15.880 Hey, Pearl.

01:01:17.000 Hey.

01:01:17.300 Sorry.

01:01:18.320 How's it going?

01:01:18.900 What part of the country are you in?

01:01:21.160 I'm in Jersey.

01:01:22.220 Oh, cool.

01:01:22.620 So, um, what behaviors did your mother exhibit that were toxic?

01:01:28.360 Well, I, I was, this was really regarding my ex.

01:01:32.960 Okay.

01:01:33.400 Well, today the show is about mothers.

01:01:35.280 Yeah.

01:01:35.520 Sorry.

01:01:36.140 You get along with your mom.

01:01:37.800 I do.

01:01:38.580 Yeah.

01:01:38.960 Okay.

01:01:39.600 Okay.

01:01:39.980 Well, call in a different show.

01:01:41.440 Okay, Leo.

01:01:42.020 Okay.

01:01:42.360 Okay.

01:01:42.740 Sorry.

01:01:43.180 Bye.

01:01:43.400 Bye.

01:01:45.380 All right.

01:01:46.320 Next we got.

01:01:48.420 Uh, I'll do Roland.

01:01:49.660 All right.

01:01:53.180 Roland.

01:01:57.880 Roland, are you there?

01:02:00.680 Well, I don't even think he's there.

01:02:02.560 I think he left.

01:02:04.000 No, it says connecting audio.

01:02:05.860 Well, I see his chair.

01:02:07.240 Oh, now he's back.

01:02:08.020 There he is.

01:02:08.380 There he is.

01:02:11.880 Roland, how are you?

01:02:13.940 Can you hear me?

01:02:14.520 Hi, Pearl.

01:02:15.360 I do.

01:02:16.140 What part of the country are you in?

01:02:17.920 You look American.

01:02:19.660 I am American.

01:02:21.000 Yeah.

01:02:21.460 Midwest.

01:02:22.520 Oh, okay.

01:02:23.560 Yeah.

01:02:24.420 I was going to guess like Kansas or something.

01:02:26.840 I don't know why.

01:02:28.400 Oh, I look corn fed.

01:02:30.060 I don't know.

01:02:30.540 You kind of look like, um, I think it's the hat.

01:02:33.800 Yeah.

01:02:34.280 Yeah.

01:02:35.380 I want to keep the glare down.

01:02:36.740 I'm follicly challenged.

01:02:38.060 So I used to be a redhead like you though.

01:02:39.760 So, but now I have my, uh, now I have my soul back.

01:02:43.000 Oh, nice.

01:02:43.780 So how was your mother?

01:02:45.400 You know, I, I kind of have a triple threat.

01:02:48.160 I'm divorced, married to a single mother and, um, my mom, my mom's a real piece of work.

01:02:54.120 She's about to become a single mom.

01:02:56.340 Um, my father apparently is passing away.

01:02:59.500 He's got Alzheimer's and his terminal, but, um, they were like one of the worst things that

01:03:05.180 ever happened to me.

01:03:05.960 Uh, when I was a kid, um, my dad had a temper, but my mom would incite him to beat me and my

01:03:12.060 brother.

01:03:12.340 Um, I grew up thinking I was just, uh, the worst person ever.

01:03:18.000 And my sister thought she was, you know, the good one, uh, after I grew up and went away

01:03:25.360 to college that shifted to my, to my brother.

01:03:28.720 And one time when I was home on leave, I saw my mom do one of her typical things.

01:03:33.380 She walked in with a report card that wasn't stellar, but wasn't terrible, handed it to

01:03:38.280 my father and watched him go into the other room and, and, uh, beat my brother.

01:03:43.720 And, uh, while I, I listened to, you know, I mean, if you've ever heard an animal being

01:03:47.920 beaten, um, you know, that's what it sounded like.

01:03:51.220 And I, I dealt with, uh, the guilt from that for years because I never did anything about

01:03:56.000 it.

01:03:56.160 Um, later on, you know, those decisions, they affect you, you know, the, they say the

01:04:01.580 sins of the fathers are visited upon the sons and, uh, you know, it happens.

01:04:06.660 Uh, I married somebody who, you know, made my life hell for 20 years.

01:04:11.800 Uh, I sacrificed everything to try and make things work.

01:04:14.900 She baby trapped me very early on when I was about ready to leave.

01:04:19.020 Uh, I joined the military.

01:04:21.100 Uh, I worked through a bunch of challenges.

01:04:22.920 I ended up, um, getting cancer and still, you know, fought through that so that I could,

01:04:27.020 you know, eventually, uh, commission into the army.

01:04:31.080 I went to Afghanistan and fought.

01:04:33.660 And the hardest thing for me to see there was little kids who, uh, just weren't valued.

01:04:39.040 You know, it was just a different society there.

01:04:40.680 There's, there's things that haunt me to this day.

01:04:42.440 And I don't know which one is worse, my childhood or seeing children get dragged or just happen

01:04:50.620 to be there when, when combat would break out.

01:04:53.220 And, uh, I felt used, you know what I mean?

01:04:55.820 We talk about like men being a utility to women.

01:04:58.200 That's essentially what it was.

01:04:59.580 And about two years ago, that marriage ended.

01:05:02.200 And, you know, my, my ex-wife's the one that asked for it and said that, um, you know,

01:05:08.480 like, you know, I just was this horrible person.

01:05:11.420 And since then history has been rewritten.

01:05:13.540 I'm the one that wanted the divorce.

01:05:15.300 Um, and the ironic thing was that, um, my oldest son's now estranged for me, but my two

01:05:22.220 youngest children, I was the most effective I've ever been at being a father.

01:05:27.920 And I got to just truly be with them and love them.

01:05:31.260 And, um, over the course of those two years, I met someone, uh, I moved in with her and

01:05:37.880 I've, you know, got put in a position where with my divorce settlement, I made the decision

01:05:43.600 to marry her to avoid conceding some, uh, some legal custodial authorities that I had.

01:05:50.200 And what I've discovered is once I gave that commitment, everything shifted.

01:05:55.540 Um, you know, I've been told that I'm too focused on my children.

01:05:59.460 Um, she's made it so that like, uh, you know, she punishes me for spending time with them.

01:06:05.160 You know, uh, I've had long, uh, you know, either hours or days worth of arguing arguments.

01:06:12.320 Um, over things like, you know, I called my son when he was sick, said, if he felt better,

01:06:18.060 I'd want to play, you know, a video game with him if he was up to it.

01:06:21.360 And that turned into like, well, you're, you're focused on your son when you should be focused

01:06:24.400 on us instead.

01:06:26.300 And then on top of that, you know, this, uh, my, my new wife has a daughter that's the

01:06:33.640 same age as my kids.

01:06:34.580 They're all friends.

01:06:35.340 They all play together.

01:06:36.220 They all get along well, but I'm not allowed any authority, but I'm supposed to assume total

01:06:40.920 responsibility.

01:06:42.320 So, you know, if I asked the daughter, Hey, do you want to come wash the dishes with me?

01:06:47.280 We'll show your mom.

01:06:47.980 We appreciate her making a meal.

01:06:50.040 You know, the daughter will start to cry and, you know, she's entitled to never has to do

01:06:56.500 anything.

01:06:56.960 Oh yeah.

01:06:57.220 Sorry.

01:06:57.700 I'm over my four minutes.

01:06:58.820 Sorry.

01:06:59.180 No, no.

01:07:00.140 Let me ask you a question because when you deal with an environment like the one that you

01:07:05.140 grew up in, especially, you know, if you, there's just double it.

01:07:09.180 Tell me if you agree with me.

01:07:10.480 There's just double edged sword where you, you, you get used to be uncomfortable and you

01:07:15.980 get used to enduring.

01:07:17.920 Right.

01:07:18.360 So absolutely you're able to endure things that a lot of people can't, but then that

01:07:24.080 also translates to you enduring stuff from women that you shouldn't have to endure.

01:07:29.720 And you kind of feel like it's your duty to endure.

01:07:32.920 Was that your, your, uh, scenario?

01:07:36.440 Yeah.

01:07:36.800 Yeah.

01:07:37.020 And it's Doug, right?

01:07:38.280 Doug MPA.

01:07:38.800 Doug MPA.

01:07:39.360 Yeah.

01:07:39.740 Yeah.

01:07:40.140 No, that's absolutely the case.

01:07:41.700 In fact, you seek out, you seek out situations that are unhealthy because they feel comfortable.

01:07:48.860 They feel normal, even though they are not.

01:07:51.520 And so your family can set you up for a lifetime of suffering because you don't know what normal

01:07:57.140 is.

01:07:57.980 And, um, then when you start to actually establish healthy boundaries, that's the irony is like

01:08:03.780 when I've tried to make things, you know, good or peaceful with my ex-wife or with my

01:08:10.160 current wife, um, it encourages them.

01:08:13.480 It's almost emboldening, you know, it's like, yeah, you really are a piece of shit.

01:08:16.980 You're verifying that by coming and apologizing, but the moment that you've had enough and sorry

01:08:22.300 if I'm using language that is going to get you banned or anything, I'll try to watch it.

01:08:27.260 Go ahead.

01:08:27.800 But like, but the moment you say, you know, I've had it, I've had enough of this shit.

01:08:32.240 I'm not going to deal with it anymore.

01:08:33.780 You know, like I got to the point where, you know, like I had, I lost my job in February,

01:08:39.680 you know, I voted for Elon and, or excuse me, I voted for Trump, but, you know, I lost

01:08:45.260 my job.

01:08:45.800 I was doing military contracting, but I had some mental health issues arise from some of

01:08:50.940 that.

01:08:51.160 And I was trying to work through it.

01:08:52.500 And, um, my, my current wife was like, you need to get out of this house, you know, depressed

01:08:59.360 and you look sad all the time.

01:09:00.860 And, and like, I said, okay, I guess we're getting divorced then.

01:09:03.760 And her response to that was, well, no, you know, you, you just go get all this stuff figured

01:09:08.560 out.

01:09:08.760 I'm like, okay, so I'm supposed to go basically be homeless, live out of my car, uh, figure

01:09:13.280 out like the solutions to these longstanding issues of trauma, um, you know, going back

01:09:18.420 to childhood.

01:09:18.900 And then my reward for that is to come back here to the person who causes me the most

01:09:23.760 anxiety and stress because you're never happy.

01:09:27.680 Like, how is that?

01:09:29.040 Why, why would I come back?

01:09:30.500 Roland, you're an example of a lot of men sleep next to their worst enemy every single

01:09:35.740 night.

01:09:36.900 You are not kidding.

01:09:38.400 It's quite desperation.

01:09:40.200 You would do more trauma with the women in your life than you did in combat and your military.

01:09:44.400 If you do the totality of the stress that the, the two women in your life, well, actually

01:09:50.640 the three with your mother is probably more stress than all the combat you were in all

01:09:55.020 your military career.

01:09:56.060 I would, I felt more comfortable.

01:09:58.360 In fact, I would trade my situation for most of my life current with my ex-wife, with my

01:10:04.880 mother.

01:10:05.160 I would trade that for being with 16 of my closest friends, a combat loadout going through

01:10:11.460 a valley with a bunch of people that want to kill us because I knew that those people

01:10:14.820 had my back and that force came to worse while I die.

01:10:20.140 Right now it's okay for long suffering.

01:10:22.640 And what do I do to avoid it?

01:10:24.120 Like, all I want to do is have peace.

01:10:26.820 And it just seems to be this elusive thing because I feel like a lot of these women are

01:10:31.420 taught because they have trauma from their mothers.

01:10:33.700 It's like, well, the way to get what you want is to make sure you don't give the man in

01:10:37.160 your life, peace, and then he will give you what you want.

01:10:41.060 A hundred percent true.

01:10:41.920 And I, I, I don't, sorry, sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt.

01:10:44.780 Well, what's your plan now?

01:10:46.100 Are you going to file?

01:10:49.280 Um, I don't know.

01:10:50.720 I'm putting my face out there.

01:10:51.780 I don't know if anybody who knows her will put this out, you know, this isn't my real

01:10:55.180 name, but, but yeah, I mean, I need to, I need to leave.

01:10:58.500 And, um, it's because it's like, I, I feel like I owe her some counseling.

01:11:03.160 I have some good friends and they approach things from a religious perspective.

01:11:06.960 I'm more secular now, but I, I, I feel like I need some spirituality in my life.

01:11:12.160 I'm trying to figure out what the point of my life is because I've spent my entire life

01:11:15.580 trying to make other people happy because whatever was in me, like I thought my parents

01:11:22.380 just didn't teach me or there was something wrong with me.

01:11:24.460 And I've, I've noticed with my own children, they're born with everything that they need

01:11:29.220 to be happy.

01:11:30.640 You just need to get out of the way.

01:11:32.380 You need to make sure that you don't put them in a toxic environment.

01:11:35.980 And I am trying to repair things that I don't know if it can be done.

01:11:41.000 So like I have two kids that I want to see grow up and be happy and be healthy and, um,

01:11:48.440 have a chance to get into some, uh, good relationships.

01:11:51.360 But I, I worry about that.

01:11:53.060 My oldest son that's estranged, he married, um, a woman from Eastern Europe a little while

01:11:58.660 ago.

01:11:58.940 I barely was notified of it.

01:12:01.160 He's going to learn.

01:12:03.080 Um, but yeah, I need to get out of it and then I need to be on my own because I really

01:12:07.880 at this point don't trust myself to make good decisions about who to be with because the

01:12:12.620 thing that will feel good to me and normal is it's harmful.

01:12:16.600 It's toxic.

01:12:17.240 So, yeah.

01:12:22.160 Don't let them guilt you for filing.

01:12:25.140 Don't let her.

01:12:26.020 Yep.

01:12:26.640 Don't let her.

01:12:26.860 And just rolling real fast.

01:12:29.020 I, cause I've been married and divorced and I told you, I, I dealt with some stuff from

01:12:33.540 my ex-wife that I, I just, I never thought that I'd deal with.

01:12:37.340 Um, I know you think that what you're going through right now is the hardest part.

01:12:43.180 Um, I, I, I, I was talking to Pearl about this the other day.

01:12:48.680 I always say if you're working in a job and you're miserable or you're, or you're in a

01:12:54.680 relationship and it's terrible, you have to ask yourself this question and you have to

01:12:58.340 answer yes or no.

01:12:59.420 The, the magical question is, is this working?

01:13:01.840 Yes or no.

01:13:02.460 If the answer is no, all the rest of it's easy, but people refuse to answer that question.

01:13:06.360 Is this working?

01:13:07.220 Yes or no.

01:13:07.800 So if this isn't working for you, you have to decide that it's not working and all the

01:13:11.980 rest of it, but you have to, and, but the worst part about it isn't being in the situation.

01:13:18.820 It's like getting out of the situation.

01:13:20.640 You will get the quality of life that you want.

01:13:23.700 And when you finally get there, you're going to look back on all the rest of this time.

01:13:27.720 Like, dang, I should have did this earlier.

01:13:29.760 That looking back on regret is the hardest part about it.

01:13:33.780 So that's going to be the hardest part.

01:13:35.780 It's, it's easy this time because for 20 years I hung in there, you know, and Pearl,

01:13:39.980 you always talk about it.

01:13:41.000 It's like, it's not about you, it's about the kids.

01:13:42.840 And I'm like, I, I owed them.

01:13:45.520 And in this case, it's like, well, there's, you know, I'm like, my kids are the ones who

01:13:51.960 are suffering because of this.

01:13:53.540 I have 50% custody and I see them five days a month at the most.

01:13:57.680 Yeah.

01:13:58.040 So, but you can't, so it's an easy situation to be like, I need to leave so that I can,

01:14:02.360 cause I owe them.

01:14:04.300 Yeah.

01:14:04.660 Well, and you can't help your kids if you don't help yourself first.

01:14:08.140 That's true.

01:14:08.760 Yeah.

01:14:08.920 You can't, you can't help them if you're not in a good place.

01:14:12.400 Yeah.

01:14:12.520 Absolutely.

01:14:13.420 Um, well, let us know, call in and get, and give us any kind of update because we're really

01:14:19.960 good.

01:14:20.280 Absolutely.

01:14:20.720 Your story and stories like yours are, are what really show what men are going through

01:14:24.960 out there.

01:14:25.880 No, I listen to you all the time and I'll call in.

01:14:28.040 Doug NPA has some mental models on the website that are really helpful.

01:14:31.880 So if you, um, go to the audacity network under audacity Academy, there's one that there's

01:14:38.220 a presentation Doug MPA did on mental models and he just has a lot of really good ones.

01:14:42.540 So I appreciate that.

01:14:44.880 I look more into you, Doug.

01:14:45.940 I appreciate talking to you, uh, it's, it's nice to be able to talk to somebody into like,

01:14:50.980 you know, they've, they've been there and, and, uh, have seen the other side.

01:14:55.340 Um, yeah, it's just, just the, you, you were raised to think that enduring was the best

01:15:01.180 thing that you can do.

01:15:02.480 And that's what got your military career, but then it's also the worst part about you

01:15:06.720 too.

01:15:07.240 All right, well, we're going to move on.

01:15:08.640 Call in and give us an update.

01:15:09.900 Okay.

01:15:10.240 Call in anytime.

01:15:12.100 Take care of you guys.

01:15:12.860 All right.

01:15:14.980 Okay.

01:15:15.460 Next up we have Andres.

01:15:19.060 Andres, are you there?

01:15:28.280 Hello?

01:15:29.720 You hear me?

01:15:30.360 Yeah, I can hear you.

01:15:31.260 Yeah, Andres, are you there?

01:15:31.920 Hello?

01:15:32.620 Okay.

01:15:33.280 Awesome.

01:15:33.880 What part of the country are you in, Andres?

01:15:37.880 Texas.

01:15:39.000 Oh, nice.

01:15:39.540 Okay.

01:15:40.100 So tell me about your mom.

01:15:44.420 Yeah, I'm, I'm here.

01:15:45.800 Uh, sorry.

01:15:47.040 I'm a little slow to speak.

01:15:49.060 That's okay.

01:15:50.400 Um, so tell me about your mother.

01:15:53.960 Whoa, wait a second.

01:15:57.520 Are you there?

01:15:59.580 Yeah, I'm, I'm, I'm here.

01:16:01.100 I'm sorry.

01:16:01.740 I'm getting, uh, I'm getting the double thing.

01:16:05.540 You probably have YouTube open on another tab.

01:16:08.140 Yeah.

01:16:08.500 Yeah.

01:16:08.760 Yeah.

01:16:09.320 Yeah.

01:16:09.600 I stopped it.

01:16:10.840 All right.

01:16:11.260 Sorry about that.

01:16:11.980 Uh, so, uh, my mom, I, I, I do love my mom.

01:16:16.760 Uh, but, uh, I do have.

01:16:18.900 Are you, sir?

01:16:20.080 Issues with her.

01:16:21.440 Yeah.

01:16:21.800 And especially in the past, uh, she separated from my dad when she caught him cheating and

01:16:28.020 she drugged me into the middle of it.

01:16:30.400 Uh, I think that was probably the worst thing she ever did.

01:16:33.700 And, uh, it messed me up for a long, long time.

01:16:38.440 How old were you?

01:16:39.140 Probably about.

01:16:41.040 Oh, I'm, I'm, uh, 47.

01:16:43.480 Sorry.

01:16:43.740 Then I'm just to put into context.

01:16:45.800 Oh, I was, I was, I was 10, like 10 and a half, almost 11.

01:16:50.800 And so you only child.

01:16:51.700 Uh, no, I had a, I had a baby brother at that time, but, but my dad had been cheating

01:17:02.240 on her for a while with a, uh, a stripper and, uh, and then I guess finally she had enough

01:17:09.280 and, but you know, it's like, I wish she would have just like made the decision to leave

01:17:16.360 and not drag me into the middle of it.

01:17:18.280 Like I saw them fighting and everything and, and he hit her and, and I'm like, you know,

01:17:24.680 it was like, I, I grew up with a, a huge resentment, uh, against my dad because of that, you know?

01:17:33.580 And, and the thing was, was that, yeah, my dad's not like really a good person.

01:17:41.040 Uh, but you know, my mom's go codependent and she made the decision to stay with him.

01:17:46.360 For a long time, knowing that, you know, he's, uh, mentally abusive and all that.

01:17:53.000 Right.

01:17:53.560 So even eventually they got back together and, you know, my dad's like a coke addict and he

01:18:00.060 would come home psychotic and stuff and, and like attack me and, and threaten my life.

01:18:06.380 He's threatened my life a few times and, and, you know, like she never did anything about

01:18:13.120 that.

01:18:13.460 And it's like, you know, it's like, okay, well, I mean, I, I get that, that, uh, you

01:18:24.120 know, she's probably not equipped to deal with that stuff.

01:18:28.020 You know what I mean?

01:18:29.380 But like get help from somebody, you know, like get help from somebody else.

01:18:34.720 It's just like, she didn't protect you.

01:18:38.020 Yeah, exactly.

01:18:39.360 So, you know, um, I had to carry a lot of resentment and stuff for years.

01:18:45.820 That's it.

01:18:46.340 You know, I'm, I've been black in this country for over 40 years.

01:18:50.380 Right.

01:18:50.920 And one thing about the black communities, we always talk about the trauma that black

01:18:55.560 mothers have to go through because of the history of racism and the trauma and the blah,

01:19:00.360 blah, blah, blah, blah.

01:19:01.360 First off, everyone has their issues.

01:19:03.560 Second off, even if we take that as, oh, all these women went through all this trauma,

01:19:08.920 it's their responsibility to not take it out on their children.

01:19:11.920 There's no reason ever for mothers or fathers to take their trauma out on their children.

01:19:18.500 Period.

01:19:19.700 I totally agree with you.

01:19:21.220 Yeah, absolutely.

01:19:24.360 So anyways, yeah, that's my story.

01:19:27.240 I do still love my mom, you know, um, don't, I'm, I do have a good relationship with her

01:19:35.580 and, you know, I've forgiven her and everything like that.

01:19:38.240 And, and it's, you know, did they eventually, did they stay together or did they break up

01:19:43.120 eventually?

01:19:44.060 Oh yeah.

01:19:44.660 Oh yeah.

01:19:45.060 They're still together, but I don't have anything to do with my dad.

01:19:48.360 Got it.

01:19:49.000 Yeah.

01:19:49.360 I don't know.

01:19:50.140 Yeah.

01:19:50.600 No, I, I keep them out of my life because, uh, if not, then I'll get violent with him.

01:19:58.140 Yeah.

01:19:58.620 That's, that's how he's just, he's, he's, uh, he's screwed up really bad.

01:20:05.120 And I mean, he gets thrown out of bars all the time, you know, like at 70 something, he,

01:20:09.940 he yells and gets thrown out of bars.

01:20:12.280 Like, it's like, why are you still with him?

01:20:16.620 Well, thanks for, thanks for calling.

01:20:19.200 That's my story.

01:20:20.260 Yeah.

01:20:20.460 Thank you so much for sharing and calling anytime.

01:20:22.900 Okay.

01:20:24.240 All right.

01:20:24.740 You're welcome.

01:20:25.380 Bye.

01:20:25.540 Um, okay.

01:20:29.140 We have, um, you guys make sure to like the video, please.

01:20:35.000 And subscribe if you haven't already, we're going to get to, we're going to get Pearl

01:20:38.800 to over 2 million this year.

01:20:40.660 So hit that subscribe button and don't forget the super chat button.

01:20:44.460 All super chats will be read.

01:20:46.440 RJ, Isaac, how you doing, buddy?

01:20:48.740 Hey, I'm doing well.

01:20:50.960 Where, where are you calling from, Isaac?

01:20:52.880 I'm living in El Salvador.

01:20:56.820 Oh, cool.

01:20:57.840 Wow.

01:20:58.080 That's different.

01:20:59.180 Are you American though, right?

01:21:01.220 Yeah, that's correct.

01:21:02.080 Okay.

01:21:02.380 How was that?

01:21:02.940 Do you like it?

01:21:04.560 I love it.

01:21:05.360 Moved here, um, three months ago.

01:21:07.760 Um, before that I was living in Europe.

01:21:10.440 Um, and yeah, the, the weather here is fantastic.

01:21:15.180 Really no complaints.

01:21:16.480 Cool.

01:21:16.780 So tell me about your mom.

01:21:20.100 Yeah.

01:21:20.740 So, uh, I have a very interesting relationship with my mom.

01:21:24.560 I was homeschooled, um, K through 12 and she was the, you know, the primary teacher.

01:21:31.940 Um, and I did have, what's the best way to say this?

01:21:37.500 And I can't say what to say, you know, I wasn't later on in life.

01:21:43.500 She told me that, um, she saw a lot of characteristics in me about my dad and she saw that as a very

01:21:52.260 negative thing.

01:21:53.380 And she said that because of that, she treated me differently than my siblings.

01:21:58.080 Um, and so I was, um, I was, I just, I wasn't really given like, there's a lot of, it was

01:22:06.740 very subtle things.

01:22:07.460 Like I wasn't given the benefit of the doubt in things.

01:22:09.480 And whereas like my sister, my older sister, um, you know, she was the golden child that

01:22:15.320 would be getting, you know, all these things and, um, all the, all the privileges and expectations.

01:22:21.900 And a good example of this is when it came down to like the junior year of high school,

01:22:26.400 um, for my sister, my parents were pushing her to go into our colleges and telling her

01:22:32.760 she needs to think about her future and that she should be, you know, figuring out what

01:22:38.420 major she wants to go in, all that sort of thing.

01:22:40.440 And in my junior year, there was nothing about it.

01:22:44.340 Like there was no interest.

01:22:45.580 There was no talk about it.

01:22:46.860 My senior year comes and I'm like, Hey, by the way, shouldn't I be like planning for

01:22:51.540 college?

01:22:51.980 And like, ah, I don't think you're smart enough to go to college.

01:22:54.020 Um, and, uh, did you look like your dad and did your sister look like, okay.

01:22:59.760 So you, were you the only one that looks like him?

01:23:03.480 I was the one I, well, I was the one that looked the most like him.

01:23:07.900 Um, I was always told that basically if I wanted to know what I would look like in, you

01:23:12.360 know, 25 years, I just need to look at my dad.

01:23:14.120 Um, and my dad was rather overweight, so I was never really, uh, you know, too fond of

01:23:22.180 And are they still together or no?

01:23:25.100 Yes, they are.

01:23:26.080 Okay.

01:23:26.500 And so like, she just hates your dad, even though they're still together.

01:23:31.920 Yeah.

01:23:32.420 So my, my family's, um, very religious.

01:23:36.920 My dad and particularly my mom, my dad was, um, a pastor and he, uh, and so there was this

01:23:44.620 very strong, like, oh, just, you know, divorce is never an option, um, mentality between them

01:23:49.660 and the, but finances were always a problem.

01:23:55.620 And so it was a case where every single week they'd be, you know, fighting and shouting

01:24:01.700 at each other about, you know, usually something related to financing is usually the biggest

01:24:06.320 thing.

01:24:07.140 Um, and so it was, you know, it was one of these, um, uh, you know, experiences where,

01:24:15.080 you know, like we're supposed to be the, you know, the pastoral family and yet, you know,

01:24:19.520 inside the home, it's like, there's just shouting going on and all these other problems.

01:24:23.740 And again, I also like had undiagnosed dyslexia and ADHD and all these other problems that,

01:24:30.880 you know, I've since now figure out how to, to deal with those, but, you know, growing up,

01:24:35.860 that just, uh, you know, cause a lot of problems where it was really difficult for me to go

01:24:40.480 through school and, and, you know, actually succeed.

01:24:43.760 But when I actually did, you know, push myself into college and like, um, I can based off state

01:24:49.940 laws and being homeschooled, she could basically give me any grades she wanted.

01:24:53.680 Um, and she just gave me really bad grades.

01:24:56.940 Um, cause she's like, you know, has to be fair and your own mom.

01:25:01.000 Oh my God.

01:25:03.400 Oh, and you couldn't even get away from her.

01:25:06.460 Cause you had to do the homeschool.

01:25:08.420 Oh, did you want to go to, did you want to go to public school?

01:25:12.840 Um, I didn't, so my, my dad, after my dad was a pastor, like when I was about 14, he

01:25:19.080 became the, a, um, okay.

01:25:22.860 I did not want to go to public school at the time because I was very much just, this

01:25:29.340 was all I knew.

01:25:29.940 And, and I was told again and again, how important it is to, you know, get this kind

01:25:34.420 of education and how important it is.

01:25:36.400 And I was, I mean, uh, propagandize is probably the best word.

01:25:41.220 And when I actually, um, after my dad was a pastor, he became a Bible teacher at a private

01:25:47.180 school.

01:25:47.440 And so we could have even gone to this private school for free because we would have gone

01:25:52.120 to free tuition and all my friends were part of the private school.

01:25:54.760 And at that point I probably, I was like, you know what, this might be better fit for

01:25:57.960 me.

01:25:58.200 Um, I think I'll do better with that kind of structure, but, um, saying that was a massive

01:26:03.880 insult to my mom.

01:26:05.080 And so I could never actually say that she should ask the question like, Oh, do you want

01:26:09.020 to go to that school?

01:26:09.800 Like it was this, um, like a threat that how dare you ever actually suggest you might want

01:26:15.500 to do that.

01:26:16.300 Um, and so I can never admit that.

01:26:19.540 And, um, but when I, I actually did manage to get to school, to, to college, even though she

01:26:24.640 was saying I would probably fail, uh, actually, you know, fairly well in college, but, um,

01:26:30.300 so I can't say that the academically, at least that the homeschooling was bad, but I do see

01:26:35.220 that there's a lot of negative aspects that came from that.

01:26:37.180 So you thought that you were not that good at school and then you went to school and

01:26:40.780 you did pretty well.

01:26:42.360 Cause your mom was giving you all these bad grades, right?

01:26:44.980 You probably thought you were like, if my mom was giving me bad grades, I would think

01:26:48.760 I was dumb.

01:26:49.800 Right.

01:26:50.740 My own mother.

01:26:52.160 And then you got a public part of it.

01:26:53.800 Yeah.

01:26:53.960 I'm just, I'm just wondering, you could correct me if that's not what happened.

01:26:58.100 Well, part of it is that my, um, I don't know how to say this except just directly.

01:27:03.280 My, my family is very intelligent.

01:27:04.820 Like, um, and so my younger brother, he was doing like two grades above me in, in math.

01:27:12.560 Um, cause he was very good at math and he's making a lot of money now, um, with that.

01:27:17.420 Um, my younger sister, she was also, um, excelling in academically.

01:27:21.740 She actually was able to get a full ride scholarship to get her doctorate at, at Brown.

01:27:27.700 So they were paying her to go to, to, to get her doctorate there.

01:27:30.660 Um, so just a lot of very smart people in, uh, with my siblings.

01:27:35.060 And for me, I was just struggling with math.

01:27:39.040 I couldn't read well.

01:27:40.320 I couldn't do, uh, and again, it's not that I, uh, it came down to dyslexia.

01:27:45.500 I just have a hard time reading from physical books.

01:27:47.600 And when I actually went to college and started doing math, something I thought was, I was really

01:27:52.800 bad at, I turned out that I was actually above all my peers just because of different perspective

01:27:57.460 and expectations that we had academically.

01:28:00.700 Okay.

01:28:01.400 My, I can tell you.

01:28:03.040 So, um, I transferred off to a university out of state after I went to community college

01:28:09.280 and I, I intentionally didn't tell my mother because I knew she was going to tear it down.

01:28:14.260 Right.

01:28:14.860 So the day before I left, I told my mom, I was leaving.

01:28:20.180 And the last words that she said to me was, I don't know why you're going down there.

01:28:24.580 Cause all you're going to do is fail out and, and end up on our couch.

01:28:29.100 Then, then what are you going to do?

01:28:30.660 Those are the last words that she said to me.

01:28:32.980 And then, um, when I started my professional career after my, uh, after grad school, I got

01:28:39.440 a job in a different state.

01:28:42.000 And, uh, cause I moved back in with my parents after grad school.

01:28:45.120 And then like, I had to go because my mom was treating me like she was, treat me like

01:28:49.320 she was when I was a kid, just being just horrible to me.

01:28:51.640 Right.

01:28:52.240 So I applied for jobs out of state and I took a job out of state and my mom told me, she

01:28:59.000 summed up my entire childhood when she said, I hate you when you're here, but I miss you

01:29:05.120 when you're gone.

01:29:07.280 She literally said, so that to me.

01:29:10.540 Yeah.

01:29:10.960 Very familiar.

01:29:11.640 And, and actually what, what happened for me is so I wanted to go to college to one of

01:29:16.180 the state schools.

01:29:16.920 Um, it was, you know, a big state school that had a great program like the campus.

01:29:21.400 Um, it was about two hours away from my, um, my house and I was going to just do some,

01:29:26.820 some business degree.

01:29:27.800 Uh, so it wasn't anything special, but my mom said that she would not allow me to do

01:29:33.520 that.

01:29:33.860 I had to go to the closest school that offered the program I was interested in, which happened

01:29:38.820 to be a couple blocks from my house.

01:29:41.020 And it was a private Christian school, um, which cost more money than the, of course,

01:29:45.260 in the state school.

01:29:46.480 And again, where it was a tiny college, less than a thousand students.

01:29:50.460 Um, and of course I also then had to stay at home to save money because why would I go

01:29:55.800 to live on campus?

01:29:56.800 If it's just a couple blocks away, that makes no sense.

01:29:59.620 And so I, I absolutely hated that because, you know, I'm, you know, want to be able to

01:30:05.060 get away from, from the house and want to be able to get out as quickly as I can.

01:30:08.100 And here I am stuck, uh, still living there.

01:30:10.780 And, and it was, I think what made it more frustrating was my younger brother, again,

01:30:17.080 who's, again, he's, he's a very smart guy.

01:30:19.040 So, but he was able to go to that school that I wanted to go to.

01:30:22.960 Um, there was no problem with that for, for him.

01:30:25.800 Um, and on top of it, my, my older sister, for, for whatever reason, I ended up transferring

01:30:31.440 colleges twice.

01:30:33.060 My older sister, for whatever reason, she went to every single school and made every single

01:30:37.780 of the same transfers at the same time I did.

01:30:39.940 So we both started in the same year, even though she's like two years older than me,

01:30:43.420 she both started in the same year.

01:30:44.400 We both transferred after one year to the next goal, stayed there two years and then

01:30:48.340 transferred again.

01:30:50.060 Um, and so even though we really had a lot of tension between us, like it was, it was

01:30:55.240 kind of awkward because then everyone would say, Oh, I know your sister.

01:30:57.920 And I'm like, I don't know if that's a good thing or not, but even when I finally did

01:31:02.260 graduate college and I was the first one of all my siblings to graduate, you know, I had,

01:31:06.480 I didn't have a 4.0 GPA, but I had a pretty good GPA.

01:31:09.180 Um, and I remember like, you know, I was like, um, you know, I finally did it.

01:31:15.240 Look, I should finally, you know, my mom's gonna be happy.

01:31:17.620 I did it.

01:31:18.120 I graduated college.

01:31:18.940 I proved her wrong.

01:31:20.060 And her whole response was like, yeah, well, I mean, they just have, have lowered the standards

01:31:24.240 so much since I went to school.

01:31:25.820 So, I mean, it doesn't really mean anything.

01:31:27.880 And that just, all that, I can't tell you how much it upset me.

01:31:32.340 Did you ever confront her about it?

01:31:33.780 I've, I've tried a couple of times and I just, it gets shut down.

01:31:38.340 She starts crying, um, about how much she's a failure as a mother.

01:31:42.620 And, um, and it's, I'm sorry, I'm such a failure.

01:31:47.060 That's what I was going to go to, right?

01:31:49.420 Yeah.

01:31:49.840 And what's, what was even more frustrating?

01:31:52.140 Like, so again, I ended up getting married.

01:31:54.380 I have kids, you know, I moved out of state.

01:31:56.580 Um, and then finally, after having two kids, we're like, you know what, we should, I want

01:32:00.900 to move back.

01:32:01.560 This isn't working out.

01:32:02.680 Let's move back closer to my, uh, my parents.

01:32:05.580 And they live in a small town, tiny town in South Dakota.

01:32:08.520 So we moved an hour away to the biggest city in South Dakota.

01:32:11.980 Um, cause there's more job opportunities there.

01:32:14.640 Um, and I was like, great, you know, finally we're going to be close.

01:32:17.780 They're going to have their grandkids nearby.

01:32:19.380 It's their only grandkids.

01:32:20.500 They can come by and visit all they want.

01:32:23.060 And my, my wife, she was also like, this is going to be good too.

01:32:27.240 Like I can just go and drive out to, to, you know, to their house with the kids and, and,

01:32:33.340 you know, they can spend time with their grandkids and yeah, they basically had very little interest

01:32:39.260 in spending time with the grandkids and were, um, uh, I mean, they even told my wife, no,

01:32:47.180 you just don't come here.

01:32:48.640 Like if you're going to come here, we got to make this big plan and have things planned

01:32:52.140 out.

01:32:52.540 You can't just, you know, come over and, um, with the kids if you need to.

01:32:56.760 Um, and even things like, you know, trying to say, we wanted to say, can you come over

01:33:03.020 to our place and watch the kids overnight?

01:33:04.660 So my wife and I can go, you know, get a hotel, um, that they would never do that.

01:33:09.820 Um, if they, if we wanted to do that, I would have to go drive the kids over to their

01:33:13.680 house, drop the kid.

01:33:14.440 You can see articles about how, what's your age range?

01:33:18.640 Um, I'll be 35 next week.

01:33:21.640 Yeah.

01:33:21.860 They have whole articles about how, um, grandparents your age just aren't participating with their

01:33:28.860 grandkids.

01:33:29.540 They're just saying F these kids.

01:33:31.300 So it's not just you.

01:33:33.420 There's a lot.

01:33:34.580 Yeah.

01:33:34.760 There's a lot of, uh, so I would, you have to learn the hard way, but having the expectation

01:33:40.220 that grandparents will go along with the grandkids is kind of not realistic these days.

01:33:45.700 Well, and it goes back to what you're saying.

01:33:48.440 Like, you know, they'll like, you know, again, since I moved out of the States, you know,

01:33:52.520 they, um, hardly get to see the kids at all.

01:33:55.480 Um, and it's always like, Oh, we miss you so much.

01:33:59.000 And we want you to come back and wish you were closer.

01:34:01.500 And, you know, I, again, being in Europe, we had a seven hour time difference.

01:34:06.340 Now it's a, either since there's no time savings time in El Salvador, it's either a one hour

01:34:12.560 difference or no time difference.

01:34:14.400 And I even got the kit, my kids tablets.

01:34:17.020 So, and set them up with, you know, messenger kids.

01:34:20.060 So my, my mom can, cause she uses Facebook messenger.

01:34:22.940 So if she wants to call in, she can message them and keep in touch with them and, and be

01:34:27.460 connected.

01:34:28.600 And I don't think my, you know, in the past three months that I got this all set up and

01:34:33.240 we've been on the same time time zone, I don't think she's messaged or contacted him once.

01:34:39.480 Okay.

01:34:40.020 I mean, it just, it's, and you know, I will add, uh, two of my kids are autistic.

01:34:45.400 So only one of them is actually able to talk.

01:34:47.420 And, you know, I, I will encourage him to go and send messages and stuff and she might

01:34:52.740 respond to a message, but she's, there's no initiative on, on her part to go and actually

01:34:56.740 reach out and do anything.

01:34:58.260 Right.

01:35:00.200 Um, well, thanks for calling in and sharing your story.

01:35:03.520 Call in any time.

01:35:04.400 Okay.

01:35:05.760 Yeah, of course.

01:35:06.320 Thank you so much.

01:35:06.920 Thank you.

01:35:08.440 You know, Doug and Pierre thought about that for a bit.

01:35:11.840 Um, you know, cause I'm, I'm not against homeschooling, but I've always, I've always

01:35:17.400 thought that it would be torture if you had a crazy mom, you know?

01:35:21.700 Yeah.

01:35:22.360 Yeah.

01:35:22.900 And cause you always hear the trads talk about homeschooling and I'm not against it, but

01:35:26.720 I'm like, God, if the mother's doing it, I don't know, man.

01:35:32.380 Yeah.

01:35:32.940 Um, there's a super, you're stuck.

01:35:34.980 You saw that one, um, influencer who, who met that psychotherapist and then they were

01:35:43.360 doing, she was doing all that stuff to her children.

01:35:45.600 Oh yeah.

01:35:46.700 Oh yeah.

01:35:47.600 Um, there's a super chat.

01:35:48.960 Can't people just let go?

01:35:50.120 I don't want to be like any of you.

01:35:51.360 So I'll just live my own life.

01:35:53.960 Okay.

01:35:54.380 Well then don't watch the show, Richie.

01:35:55.820 It's fine.

01:35:57.220 Oh, but 20 bucks.

01:35:58.160 I'll still read it.

01:35:58.920 Sorry.

01:35:59.140 Go ahead.

01:35:59.400 Doug MPA.

01:36:00.700 We have one last caller here and then we can wrap it up.

01:36:04.360 Cause I know you, you're hard out a little bit.

01:36:06.560 Okay.

01:36:06.800 So we're going to let Nick in.

01:36:10.420 Nick has four minutes.

01:36:11.860 Oh, wait, no, he dropped out.

01:36:17.080 Um, bro, this is how far it goes.

01:36:22.120 The motherhood denial.

01:36:23.240 I had a friend and, uh, she went to Catholic school and when she was in fifth and sixth

01:36:29.940 grade, like her, her teacher, you know, all the teachers were religious, were clergymen.

01:36:35.260 This guy was literally, you know, uh, having sex with the, with her and two of her friends

01:36:42.720 in fifth and sixth grade.

01:36:44.100 It was terrible.

01:36:44.540 Right.

01:36:44.980 And so she went to go try to tell her mom, but her mom was like a pillar of the religious

01:36:50.960 community and blah, blah, blah.

01:36:53.420 So she's like, how dare you say it about him?

01:36:55.900 He's a good man.

01:36:56.700 Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

01:36:57.940 So she had to spend like all of, all of one grade of elementary school, like, you know,

01:37:04.980 in this guy's class while he was doing it to her and two of her friends.

01:37:08.460 Right.

01:37:09.300 So then fast forward when she was in high school, it finally got out that this guy was

01:37:14.880 doing that to young girls and he got convicted.

01:37:19.180 And this woman decided to say, I, I tried to tell everybody that this was happening.

01:37:25.160 And even to her mom and her mom to this day is in complete denial.

01:37:29.480 And when she tries to bring up the fact that her mom didn't, um, keep her safe, she starts

01:37:34.440 crying and then shaming her.

01:37:36.400 And so when that happens to men, they just say, yeah, I did.

01:37:40.580 I failed.

01:37:41.660 Do you know what I mean?

01:37:42.140 Like met, like when you tell a man that he was a shitty dad or he did something wrong as

01:37:46.720 a parents, they just say, yes, I did.

01:37:49.680 You know, but women, it's like, God, they'll gaslight you to the end of the earth and then

01:37:55.720 make your life hell for noticing.

01:37:58.020 That's so messed up.

01:37:59.680 That's so messed up.

01:38:00.640 Go ahead.

01:38:01.120 Sorry.

01:38:01.360 Let's let in Nick.

01:38:03.140 Nick is the last caller.

01:38:06.400 We could do another mother show though.

01:38:08.140 This was, how many callers are on the line?

01:38:11.680 This is pretty.

01:38:12.140 Nick is the last one.

01:38:12.880 Okay.

01:38:13.140 I know I meant, were there more or no?

01:38:14.860 Cause this is pretty good for this time a day.

01:38:17.940 Nick is the last one.

01:38:18.940 Okay.

01:38:19.660 Hi Nick.

01:38:20.500 Where are you calling from?

01:38:21.740 Hello.

01:38:23.360 Uh, Midwest.

01:38:24.260 Oh, nice.

01:38:25.680 Okay.

01:38:26.380 So tell me about your mom.

01:38:30.600 Tell me about how is the mother?

01:38:33.540 She's, you know, I don't know.

01:38:34.840 She got, she got remarried.

01:38:36.600 I talked to you about her a little bit before.

01:38:38.500 Yeah.

01:38:38.800 I remember.

01:38:39.400 Yeah.

01:38:39.940 Yeah.

01:38:41.700 Yeah.

01:38:42.060 She's good.

01:38:43.120 You know, normal.

01:38:44.120 Well, the topic is what, um, behaviors did your mother exhibit that were topic and did

01:38:50.900 you ever confront her?

01:38:51.980 That were toxic.

01:38:53.320 Oh yeah.

01:38:54.360 I definitely confronted her.

01:38:55.540 I mean, just like, you know, I think the number one thing was just like, you know, selfishness

01:39:01.440 essentially.

01:39:02.460 I don't want to talk too much shit about her, but like, you know, like just cause someone

01:39:07.280 has a kid does not mean that the show is now not hers.

01:39:12.660 You know?

01:39:14.840 Wait, say that again.

01:39:15.820 Like just because someone has a kid, just because a mom or a woman has a kid does not

01:39:20.620 mean that now like the show is about the kid.

01:39:22.740 You know, I think that's one of the most common things that happens.

01:39:24.900 Mm-hmm.

01:39:25.700 Yeah.

01:39:26.060 So this whole myth of the selfless mother who's sacrificing for her, that's false.

01:39:32.680 That is false.

01:39:34.200 Yeah.

01:39:35.120 Yeah.

01:39:35.600 It's not like, Oh, you know, she did so much for all the other people and blah, blah, blah.

01:39:43.020 Whatever.

01:39:43.580 It's like, no, no, no, no, no.

01:39:45.540 You're, you kind of, you kind of, you know, and don't get me wrong.

01:39:49.840 A lot of them do a lot of stuff, but it's still like the, her show.

01:39:52.540 You know what I mean?

01:39:53.180 Like it's still, it's funny.

01:39:55.440 They'll do things for themselves and then convince you that they did it for you.

01:40:00.160 Oh yeah.

01:40:02.100 Yeah.

01:40:02.880 You're like, I didn't ask for that.

01:40:04.480 And they'll be like, Oh no, but I did so much.

01:40:07.920 And you're like, what?

01:40:11.000 I'm like, I didn't want any of that.

01:40:13.400 You know what I mean?

01:40:14.120 Or like, it was kind of had no choice in some situations.

01:40:17.520 Like, Oh, I worked so hard to keep a roof over our heads or whatever.

01:40:20.560 And it's like, did you not want to have a roof over?

01:40:22.380 Like, if I wasn't part of this equation where you like, fuck dude, I want to be homeless

01:40:33.800 so bad.

01:40:34.820 But I have this kid.

01:40:37.820 Or my favorite is I gave birth to you.

01:40:41.240 I'm like, you chose to do that.

01:40:44.200 The difference is like, I didn't murder you.

01:40:49.260 You should be happy.

01:40:50.780 Like, okay.

01:40:52.540 Thanks.

01:40:53.360 Yes.

01:40:53.800 I appreciate that.

01:40:55.640 I appreciate you didn't succumb to one of the worst possible human traits.

01:41:00.240 I gave up so much.

01:41:02.300 I gave up so much for you while they proceeded to give up nothing at all.

01:41:07.940 Did you give up your job?

01:41:09.140 Did you give up your job?

01:41:10.440 No.

01:41:11.100 Did you give up any?

01:41:14.220 What'd you give up?

01:41:15.980 So much, Pearl.

01:41:17.000 She gave up all of it.

01:41:19.000 Go ahead.

01:41:20.700 The hero worship for motherhood is just insane, guys.

01:41:24.520 Women are having less children.

01:41:26.040 They're actually doing less.

01:41:27.220 But mothers want all the credit.

01:41:31.140 And everything men do and fathers do, it's just expected and automatic.

01:41:36.480 Yes.

01:41:37.340 Men create the internet, bridges, roads, air conditioning, buildings.

01:41:43.380 And women will say, yeah, but women give birth and are mothers.

01:41:46.380 That's all they got.

01:41:47.300 That's all they have.

01:41:48.680 Yeah, literally.

01:41:49.680 She kept the roof over your head, buddy.

01:41:51.240 All right.

01:41:51.580 So you got to respect her.

01:41:53.620 And really, it's just taking credit because let's be honest.

01:41:56.580 The dad is the one fixing everything around the house.

01:42:00.940 Like, if there's a leak in the roof, she's not fixing it.

01:42:06.300 Yeah, it is wild.

01:42:07.340 The men make more anyways, but, you know.

01:42:11.260 Yeah.

01:42:12.500 But it doesn't matter.

01:42:13.320 It's weird.

01:42:13.820 It's so weird.

01:42:14.640 It really is like a – and one thing I've seen – this might sound a little crazy,

01:42:18.480 but I think the people who constantly call other people narcissists are always narcissists.

01:42:22.280 Like one for one.

01:42:22.540 100% true.

01:42:23.180 100%.

01:42:23.540 Yeah.

01:42:25.080 That's one of the reasons why you never hear men calling women that they date or their

01:42:30.160 exes narcissists.

01:42:31.120 It's only women.

01:42:32.520 Narcissists is not like something that a lot of guys are like constantly calling other

01:42:36.560 people.

01:42:37.100 You know what I mean?

01:42:37.940 And it's about fathers and you're like, well, they're not focused all on them.

01:42:44.100 I don't know.

01:42:44.560 Whatever.

01:42:44.860 Well, really quickly, the Andrew Wilson stuff, what happened with that?

01:42:51.460 What do you mean?

01:42:52.180 The debate?

01:42:55.400 Yeah.

01:42:55.900 I mean, like, did he have a talk with his wife and then just go full feminist or like

01:43:00.480 what?

01:43:03.440 I mean, we just have a difference of opinion.

01:43:05.420 Like he just seemed way different than normal.

01:43:07.760 Yeah.

01:43:07.900 I mean, he's a, he's a good guy.

01:43:11.960 We just have a difference of opinion.

01:43:13.760 So yeah, I like him.

01:43:15.180 Yeah, I know.

01:43:15.580 I do too.

01:43:16.040 He's a great guy.

01:43:17.140 Like that just seemed like out of nowhere.

01:43:20.880 I don't know.

01:43:21.940 No, I think it's consistent with his worldview.

01:43:24.700 Right.

01:43:25.020 Like save the world.

01:43:26.000 I mean, it's, I would say it's consistent.

01:43:27.800 Is it?

01:43:27.940 Like, yeah.

01:43:29.520 And Andrew, Andrew and Rachel Wilson are good people.

01:43:33.440 Pearl and Andrew and Rachel are all friends.

01:43:35.940 So it's just, you know, I just don't think that they're ever going to come to a consensus

01:43:39.280 on, on the whole marriage thing.

01:43:41.800 But other than that, man, Andrew and Rachel are great.

01:43:45.800 Yeah, I normally agree with you.

01:43:47.760 I just like, I don't know.

01:43:48.520 That came out of left field a little bit.

01:43:50.160 And I like the conversations I've heard had, like I've heard Pearl have with Andrew

01:43:55.060 are almost always just like them to be in like, yeah, isn't it crazy?

01:43:58.760 What's going on with this?

01:44:00.640 Yeah, I know.

01:44:01.700 I mean, that's like just the one thing that we disagree on.

01:44:05.660 It may be religion.

01:44:06.700 I'm not that religious.

01:44:07.680 I'm a degenerate.

01:44:10.320 I get it.

01:44:11.120 Me too.

01:44:12.700 Okay.

01:44:13.420 Well, we're going to move on to the next caller.

01:44:16.280 Call in any time.

01:44:17.420 Yeah, call in any time.

01:44:19.280 Awesome.

01:44:19.760 Yeah.

01:44:19.960 Thanks, guys.

01:44:21.380 Oh, yeah.

01:44:21.820 We're going to let Shiv up real quick.

01:44:23.980 All right.

01:44:24.220 Yeah, I got him.

01:44:25.560 Okay.

01:44:27.940 I'm going to read the super chat before he goes.

01:44:32.180 Apparently, there's one on the website I'm missing.

01:44:34.620 Guys, if you do have a question, comment, or concern, feel free to put it on the website.

01:44:41.280 We do have a live chat.

01:44:42.160 Always going on the website.

01:44:43.260 You don't have to pay for me to read your comment.

01:44:44.940 You just put it on the live chat.

01:44:47.280 Pearl, your setup is on spot tonight.

01:44:49.540 Cracked it.

01:44:50.080 This is the fashion from now on.

01:44:53.320 Also, last thing.

01:44:54.920 Today is the last day to be enrolled in our school course for free where we do have people

01:45:01.800 teaching you how to improve your health, your wellness, your love life, and catching these

01:45:07.680 hoes, cheating, and lying.

01:45:09.400 We have PIs coming on to teach you how to catch your cheating before the ring, not after.

01:45:14.700 But it's going to be expensive.

01:45:16.500 I've been telling you guys that we're raising the price tomorrow.

01:45:19.700 It's the last day.

01:45:20.600 So if you want it, get it now.

01:45:22.220 Hi, Shiv.

01:45:22.920 Cook.

01:45:24.780 Cook your mom.

01:45:26.060 Cook her.

01:45:26.420 No, honestly, the worst thing is, is I will say too, women are so bad at picking their

01:45:33.640 son, like who their son should marry.

01:45:36.640 Like, like every, every time I have a girl that like, I, it gets to a point where I tell

01:45:42.140 my mom, like when she asks about dating, she always has like so much criticism, but it's

01:45:47.280 all like, and then she'll like the girls that like were really toxic, she'd be like, oh,

01:45:51.300 she seems nice.

01:45:52.240 What, why didn't that like work out?

01:45:54.320 So, so I will say like, never ask your mom, like for like, never even get relationship

01:46:00.360 advice from, from your mom.

01:46:01.600 Women just can't give good relationship advice in general.

01:46:04.200 Oh my gosh.

01:46:04.600 Every time I've asked my mom who I should date, she gives terrible advice too.

01:46:09.220 Awful.

01:46:09.940 Awful.

01:46:11.360 Yeah.

01:46:12.080 But go ahead.

01:46:13.320 Yeah.

01:46:14.020 So have you, did your mom ever do anything toxic and did you ever confront her?

01:46:19.360 Um.

01:46:20.260 Are you scared to answer?

01:46:21.320 No, no, no, it's not even that.

01:46:23.700 I just got lucky that, um, I, I went to India for high school.

01:46:28.060 Um, I was born and raised here, but then I moved to India for high school and we just

01:46:30.760 had so much staff and my mom was just a workaholic.

01:46:34.220 My mom's like one of those people who's just always at work.

01:46:37.420 So I kind of got lucky.

01:46:38.940 I'd never had to deal with her.

01:46:40.120 Right.

01:46:40.600 Like, I, like in the nicest of ways, like it's, you know, you, you just come back from

01:46:45.380 work and then go to bed.

01:46:46.260 Like I had a cook, a maid and we had chauffeur drivers in India.

01:46:49.780 So it was almost better that way.

01:46:52.560 My opinion.

01:46:54.660 Cause your dad stayed home.

01:46:56.080 Right.

01:46:56.780 Yeah.

01:46:57.160 My dad's great.

01:46:58.520 He's very chill.

01:46:59.580 I think the hard part is like, yeah, my mom was very like, um, she like when it comes

01:47:06.080 to planning stuff out, she's really bad.

01:47:08.000 I will say that.

01:47:08.660 Like if, if, like she was just in town, she visited me in San Francisco and, um, she was

01:47:14.200 like, Oh, let's, I want to do these things today.

01:47:15.980 And I'm like, mom, these things are two hours driving apart.

01:47:18.640 Like we can't do it all today.

01:47:20.080 And I'm like, why didn't you tell me yesterday when we were in this area?

01:47:23.200 So yeah, I will say like, that's one thing that she's really bad at.

01:47:26.460 She just cannot plan things out well.

01:47:28.860 And they all think they're really good at planning is the worst part there.

01:47:32.840 Have you ever had, honestly, like I've had girls plan out dates for me, like every once

01:47:36.680 in a bloom, like I'll do the first 10 dates and then they'll be like, Oh, like, let me

01:47:40.420 pick the next one.

01:47:41.320 They always fuck it up.

01:47:42.840 Like, I can't tell you how many girls have like, have like forgot to get a reservation.

01:47:47.340 Like when they've like, they're like, Oh, we'll go to this restaurant.

01:47:49.480 We show up to like the busiest restaurant and then they go, Oh, I just thought we could

01:47:52.580 walk in.

01:47:53.460 I'm like, what?

01:47:54.080 You didn't know that like we should get a reservation or like they, yeah, just, or they go

01:47:58.560 like, they'll bring their, you know, it's their friends and their friends are deathly

01:48:02.280 allergic to peanuts.

01:48:03.260 And then they'll go and pick a Thai restaurant where all the food's peanut based off awful

01:48:08.600 level planning.

01:48:09.420 I mean, I can talk, it's not, uh, I don't know if we're going off topic, but I will

01:48:13.220 say too, like, I don't think women really appreciate when guys do stuff that's really

01:48:18.300 special for them.

01:48:19.240 Like they always like to say that I want a guy who just knows me and like, here's me

01:48:22.880 out.

01:48:23.120 And like, I love a guy who cares about attention to detail.

01:48:25.600 And like, you already know my story with, with the girl I'm dating where, you know,

01:48:30.080 she's a huge fan of, of the warriors get warrior tickets and I'm getting ghosted.

01:48:35.460 So it's like, and then I know these are the same women who are like, you know, guys aren't

01:48:39.060 attention oriented.

01:48:39.960 They don't pay attention to detail.

01:48:41.080 I'm like, no, I listened to every one of those conversations.

01:48:43.360 And that's why I know you're a warriors fan.

01:48:45.200 Hence why I bought the warrior tickets.

01:48:46.620 And it's so much harder for you to listen to, we're not interesting.

01:48:50.120 So, so you guys listening to us is way more, is way harder than us listening to you.

01:48:56.440 Cause you guys are way more interesting than us.

01:48:58.840 Yeah.

01:48:59.160 Like, and the other thing too, is like, if I just, I would rather go to the warriors

01:49:02.280 game with my boys.

01:49:03.020 Right.

01:49:03.360 Cause then I, if I drink a little too much or whatever, it's like, none of my, my guy

01:49:08.620 friends are going to be like, dude, what the heck you're slamming a second beer.

01:49:11.740 But like I've girls, if I take them to the warriors game, they'll be like, don't you think

01:49:14.640 you've drank too much?

01:49:15.460 Don't you think this or whatever?

01:49:16.840 Or like, Hey, can you explain the whole game to me?

01:49:19.420 Yeah.

01:49:19.860 So it's, it's, I don't think women like understand that, that like, I would rather go to this

01:49:24.440 game by with the boys I'm doing, I'm doing this for her.

01:49:27.680 Like I'm not doing this.

01:49:29.240 But you know why?

01:49:30.400 One of the reasons why you'd rather go with your guy friends is because you don't have

01:49:35.140 to filter yourself and try to, you don't have to stay present.

01:49:42.460 How can I put this here?

01:49:43.700 You, you act.

01:49:44.320 Yeah.

01:49:44.420 Yeah.

01:49:44.560 You can just be yourself.

01:49:45.560 Right.

01:49:45.800 Like exactly.

01:49:46.780 The worst advice is when people are, when, when this is what girls will say too, if you

01:49:52.780 ever ask girls for dating advice, they'll say, just be yourself.

01:49:56.180 Shiv, just be confident, bro.

01:49:57.420 Because the worst advice in the history of dating, um, and so, no, it's like I got laid

01:50:03.680 when I was nothing like myself.

01:50:05.860 One of the reasons why is here's the thing.

01:50:08.380 Um, women, I dated surgeons, doctors, lawyers that are women, and they will not approach a

01:50:15.600 man.

01:50:16.420 They don't know how to do it.

01:50:17.820 So why ask a woman who's never going to do it ever what you should do?

01:50:22.960 Don't ever do it guys.

01:50:24.040 Don't ask a woman how to approach a woman.

01:50:26.200 Don't ask a woman how to get laid because they're never going to do it ever.

01:50:31.480 Yeah.

01:50:31.960 You, you almost, you almost can do the exact opposite of what your gut tells you to do.

01:50:36.040 And that's closer to the truth.

01:50:38.200 Whatever we say, do the opposite.

01:50:40.160 Yeah.

01:50:40.380 Just do literally the opposite.

01:50:41.840 You'll, you'll, I'm not saying you'll, you'll end up like a gig of Chad, but you'll end up

01:50:46.020 way better than your current situation.

01:50:47.560 We say, give us flowers and you, you punch her in the face and she's more like, she's

01:50:53.180 statistically.

01:50:54.200 So here's the funny part, right?

01:50:55.980 So Doug, I want your opinion on this.

01:50:57.700 So, so I've been seeing this girl for about seven weeks and, and, you know, she went to

01:51:02.480 India for nine days or whatever.

01:51:04.800 So she didn't text me for the nine days.

01:51:06.500 Like she texted me at the airport and then went to India.

01:51:09.060 Like, and I responded back like in an hour.

01:51:10.500 So I knew she could have responded.

01:51:12.060 And in India, she has white, like there's a way she could have responded if she wanted

01:51:14.820 to.

01:51:15.160 She did it.

01:51:15.860 And then she texted me yesterday and then I texted her with, Hey, like I got warrior

01:51:20.640 tickets this Sunday, if you want to go.

01:51:22.720 And I still haven't heard back from her.

01:51:24.500 So what I'm thinking of doing is I'm thinking of when she responds back.

01:51:28.860 Cause she'll probably respond back tomorrow and make you wait two days.

01:51:31.320 I think I'm going to respond back with like, Hey, I didn't hear from you.

01:51:34.160 So I invited another girl I'm dating to the game, but maybe we can hang out next week.

01:51:38.660 And I was literally going to say, if, if she's doing this, she shouldn't be the only girl

01:51:43.760 that you're talking to.

01:51:45.100 No, correct.

01:51:45.660 Which I'm not, but she's the one that up until this point, I liked the best, but she

01:51:49.800 already has now slid a couple.

01:51:51.320 Cause I can't, I can't believe you do something as nice as buy someone warrior tickets.

01:51:54.720 Who's a diehard warriors fan.

01:51:56.540 Mind you, these tickets aren't easy to get right.

01:51:58.400 I'd be, yes, a hundred percent, you know, but like, it's still like, and, and I'm just

01:52:02.400 so pissed off because nothing is worse than when a guy goes out of his way for a

01:52:06.560 girl he likes and then gets, gets, uh, disrespected or, and all they have to do is show up and

01:52:12.880 look pretty.

01:52:13.380 Cause I, I've been talking to bro about this.

01:52:16.480 I tell her my, my dating stories here in the big city I live in.

01:52:20.300 And one of the biggest things that these women show up late, bro, they show up late 45 minutes

01:52:26.180 an hour late.

01:52:27.300 And it's just like, and a lot of people like, Whoa, she, she wouldn't show up if she, she

01:52:32.580 liked you, bro.

01:52:33.180 No women just is, it's a, they just don't respect men period.

01:52:37.160 It doesn't matter who you are.

01:52:38.880 It doesn't matter what you do.

01:52:39.940 It doesn't matter.

01:52:40.420 The only reason, the only way they will respect you is if, if you, like, if I invited her to

01:52:45.400 Justin Bieber, it was just so she could flirt with Justin Bieber and find a new guy to monkey

01:52:48.740 branch.

01:52:49.400 Then she'll show up on time.

01:52:50.680 Right.

01:52:51.020 If there's like, Oh, there's more rich high level guys.

01:52:53.000 I could like be conniving with, then she'll show up on, on, on the dot.

01:52:57.460 But like, honestly, the other, the other problem too, I find like, like going back to like,

01:53:02.300 why I'd rather go to the game with, with the boys is like little things, right?

01:53:06.280 Like if I go with my, my guy friends to the warriors game, if one of them is going to go

01:53:09.960 get a beer, they'll just ask me like, Hey, can I get you a beer?

01:53:12.780 A girl will just make you leave the game at your favorite part of the game to go get her

01:53:16.720 a drink or new food.

01:53:18.100 Or like, she won't know how to direct you to the stadium or how to get to the VIP seating

01:53:22.500 or whatever.

01:53:22.960 So like, at least the boys though, like we'll divide and conquer and like try to make this

01:53:26.360 where we can all shut our brains off a little bit.

01:53:28.520 But when you're with a chick, you have to always be on high alert.

01:53:31.580 I mean, you're always thinking about, Oh, now I have to like show her there.

01:53:35.300 And God forbid, if I like get lost in the stadium for six seconds, she's going to think

01:53:38.700 less of me.

01:53:39.200 So I better nail where my seats are on the first get go.

01:53:42.220 I mean, ladies in the chat.

01:53:43.500 I mean, he's got a slot available of what is the game Sunday, this, this Sunday, 7pm

01:53:50.380 chase centers.

01:53:50.940 Anyone in San Francisco?

01:53:51.980 Yeah.

01:53:52.760 I like size, size eight or smaller, size eight or smaller dress size.

01:53:58.880 Otherwise get out of here under 30.

01:54:01.840 Yeah.

01:54:02.280 It's just, you know, I, it's just about respecting a man's time and effort and women want a man

01:54:08.460 to show effort, but they don't want to respect that effort.

01:54:12.320 Like they never have to have to put that effort out.

01:54:14.420 And that's the thing with women getting older, women don't have to start putting out effort

01:54:18.120 until they hit, they smash into the wall when they're 35, but then anything that you're

01:54:23.520 good at, it takes practice.

01:54:24.720 So it's like, they have to start putting in effort.

01:54:27.760 They don't know how they're not good at it.

01:54:29.220 And they've already smashed into the wall.

01:54:30.740 So the only time you're going to see women respecting your time is usually when it's too

01:54:35.420 late.

01:54:36.040 They usually have kids already, they're broke and they need help, all that stuff.

01:54:40.140 Yeah.

01:54:40.300 A hundred percent.

01:54:40.860 And, and, you know, actually Doug, I have a question for you, which is, you know, for

01:54:43.900 me, my, my way I kind of handle this with like women who do stuff is I just move on.

01:54:49.020 Right.

01:54:49.240 I just have this belief.

01:54:50.160 Like there's no, no matter what you say to a woman, it's not like they're going to take

01:54:53.560 your advice or critique.

01:54:54.500 They're just going to be women.

01:54:55.900 Right.

01:54:56.220 So for me, a lot of times in like a situation where she goes to me, like, I'm just going

01:54:59.700 to go invite another girl this Sunday and just ignore her and move on with my life.

01:55:03.280 But there's a part of me that sometimes wants to like, there's, of course my male brain wants

01:55:07.460 to text her and be like, you know why I'm pissed off, but I just don't do that.

01:55:10.700 Right.

01:55:10.880 I know.

01:55:11.280 And like, that's the most frustrating part is like women are never going to get the feedback

01:55:15.280 because we know what's going to happen if we give them the feedback.

01:55:17.260 Well, so here's the thing.

01:55:20.200 I'll challenge you on this.

01:55:22.580 Women have this need and desire for closure.

01:55:25.960 Ask any guy who breaks up with some crazy chick who wants to come over and have sex one

01:55:31.340 last time for closure and he gets her pregnant.

01:55:33.660 A lot of guys end up getting a girl pregnant.

01:55:36.660 I'm going to come over.

01:55:37.800 I need closure.

01:55:38.680 Right.

01:55:39.180 Just stop explaining yourself to women.

01:55:42.200 If, if, if you've already moved on, just, if she tries to contact you, just don't pick

01:55:49.480 up and don't answer.

01:55:51.000 And if a couple of weeks go by and she's really trying, then maybe pick up.

01:55:55.520 And then if you pick up and just act like nothing happened and just see if she wants to

01:56:00.180 move forward, but don't give them closure.

01:56:02.260 Don't give them an explanation.

01:56:03.840 Just keep it moving.

01:56:04.920 It's like ghosting guys, ghost women, ghost them.

01:56:08.780 Agreed.

01:56:09.100 You don't owe these women explanation.

01:56:11.140 You don't owe them anything.

01:56:12.680 Women feel the, and who did we learn all this stuff from guys?

01:56:16.420 Women.

01:56:16.680 From women when we were younger, they don't like it being thrown back at them.

01:56:20.600 So move on and just don't give her any kind of explanation.

01:56:26.100 Don't even pick up.

01:56:27.400 Now, if you have the bandwidth, if it's not above your comfort, give me this level and

01:56:32.320 in a week or two or three, hit her up.

01:56:34.820 And if you do just keep it moving, she's going to ask, well, what happened?

01:56:37.520 Just be like nothing.

01:56:39.720 You want to meet up or not?

01:56:40.840 It's so true.

01:56:44.460 So true.

01:56:45.020 They're just so bad at picking and they have no idea.

01:56:47.560 Like the worst part is I bet you this girl doesn't realize I'm spinning plates.

01:56:51.840 Like that's the, that's the even sillier part.

01:56:53.980 Like she probably thinks, oh, like, cause I'm, I'm like cordial on dates.

01:56:57.860 Right.

01:56:58.220 But yeah, the irony is like, yeah.

01:57:00.920 And then they go like, I don't get it.

01:57:02.480 Why did he go cold?

01:57:03.520 It's like, well, dude, I get it.

01:57:06.160 Like these girls get the red carpet treatment and then they still can't walk on the red carpet.

01:57:10.640 They have to go fuck off and like see a little part of the pottery barn or like some little

01:57:14.880 like flower shop and just go off into the distance.

01:57:17.000 Think about this for a second.

01:57:18.000 Like she hasn't talked to you since she left on a trip and then you stop communicating,

01:57:25.920 but you have the problem.

01:57:27.820 Right now.

01:57:28.740 Now, now, now mind you this, she, in fact, I was mad that I ended up getting the warrior

01:57:32.860 tickets.

01:57:33.140 Cause you know, there's the game, the season's ending and then like the odds of me being able

01:57:37.460 to go across the street to chase center and go to this game is limited.

01:57:40.260 Right.

01:57:40.640 So I just know like, Hey, there's a chance they're going to play the Sunday.

01:57:44.560 I have Amex points.

01:57:45.980 It was like pretty cheap with my thing with Amex.

01:57:49.220 So I was like, I'll get the tickets.

01:57:50.980 And now in hindsight, I go, so I rewarded bad behavior.

01:57:55.240 She didn't text me in nine days and she got warrior tickets out of it.

01:57:58.420 So I'll take the simple word for that.

01:58:00.560 My bad lesson learned.

01:58:01.760 Right.

01:58:02.280 But, but holy shit.

01:58:03.680 Like that's, I think that right there is why women act the way they do is because

01:58:07.440 they, they never really, they never really suffer from their bad consequences until they

01:58:13.120 hit the wall.

01:58:13.700 They only, they only get, they get all of it, uh, kind of at 35 or 40 years old in their

01:58:19.700 twenties.

01:58:20.140 They just don't get the feedback.

01:58:21.740 The cougars treat you real nice.

01:58:23.980 It's true.

01:58:25.080 No, it's true.

01:58:25.880 It's true.

01:58:26.480 And honestly, it's the cougars are desperate.

01:58:29.120 God, God, it's, it's the two extremes, right?

01:58:31.420 It's either like the 18, 19 year old girls or like the cougars.

01:58:34.600 Cause like 18, 19, they're just, they're just naive.

01:58:37.440 Enough.

01:58:38.260 Um, like where they, or they just don't know much of the world if you get one that

01:58:43.440 hasn't experienced too much.

01:58:44.780 So there's some fun there.

01:58:46.600 Um, but yeah.

01:58:47.820 And then the cougars, cause the cougars now they know that, but then the 18 year olds,

01:58:52.020 19, they go to the city and they're like, see ya.

01:58:54.600 No, no, no.

01:58:55.320 The 18 year olds, you can enjoy one or two months with them.

01:58:57.520 You, you get one or two months tops, right?

01:58:59.420 But once you take them to Nobu once it's over.

01:59:01.740 Cause then they go meet the other guy who can take them to Nobu.

01:59:03.860 But like the two most powerful things a man has in the current society is one, the ability

01:59:12.020 to walk away and two, the ability to determine who his girlfriend, fiance and wife is.

01:59:17.140 Don't let any woman, anybody ever take those two powers away from you.

01:59:21.360 Cause that's what society is trying to do.

01:59:24.140 So, um, and walking away means just the worst thing you can do to a woman is go cold, man.

01:59:31.600 Go cold.

01:59:32.160 So this woman, let her come back, try to reach out and just move on.

01:59:37.840 And I've been telling Pearl about this.

01:59:40.560 You got to set a comfort and convenience level and make sure that that you're not going past it.

01:59:45.580 If she's reaching out to you and texting you maybe a week or two from now and you're just bored, um,

01:59:51.220 or maybe you want to see her again, just pick it up, but don't give her any kind of explanation.

01:59:56.260 Don't do it.

01:59:57.160 Well, why'd you go cold?

01:59:58.240 I texted you when I got back and be like, I don't want to talk about you.

02:00:01.920 You want to meet up or not?

02:00:04.000 Best thing to do.

02:00:06.060 No, a hundred percent.

02:00:07.420 No, I think honestly, it's just so obvious to me.

02:00:09.960 Cause this girl's 29.

02:00:11.860 It's so obvious like that, like she's on thin ice of like ending up 40 with a bunch of cats, childless and not married.

02:00:19.160 Like a lot of these women is right at that.

02:00:21.600 I'm telling you, like, I, I just noticed like some of these girls at 28, 29, when they have these behaviors are like cooked.

02:00:27.540 Like they're not, they're not realizing like the clocks are ticking, you know, like time, like you don't get to play the games.

02:00:34.600 Like you're 21 anymore.

02:00:36.060 And that, that blows my mind.

02:00:37.900 It blows my mind when girls are 29 and they still are just as annoying as they were at 21.

02:00:44.080 Wait till you reach your, I'm sorry, go ahead.

02:00:47.460 Shiv, I put your, your Twitter in the, in the chat.

02:00:50.280 If there's any ladies.

02:00:53.680 And also.

02:00:54.540 Send your dress size.

02:00:56.060 Send your weight.

02:00:57.040 That's who you got to start with.

02:00:58.360 Weight.

02:00:59.520 Weight, height, age.

02:01:00.860 Go ahead.

02:01:02.220 Wait till you hit your, your mid thirties and forties.

02:01:04.600 And you see all these women that curbed you in their twenties, single mothers, fat, trauma, broke.

02:01:12.220 It's beautiful, man.

02:01:13.800 It is.

02:01:14.120 Oh yeah.

02:01:14.500 You know how I know that?

02:01:15.320 Cause like I was looking up like my middle school and high school classmates on Facebook and the ones that have, the girls have, that have deleted their accounts or haven't like posted a new photo in a long time.

02:01:24.360 It's cause they're fat and like fell off the wagon and they're not married.

02:01:27.180 Right.

02:01:27.460 Like it's, it's so fascinating to see that like girls will be so hot on social media and then they hit like 35 and then they realize like they screwed it all up.

02:01:36.860 And then magically like their last photo on Facebook's from like eight years ago.

02:01:40.920 But you know.

02:01:42.120 Yeah.

02:01:42.660 Just wait till you start having all, when you hit your mid to late thirties, all of your ex-girlfriends will be hitting you up.

02:01:48.460 But every single ex-girlfriend I've ever had has hit me up on social media about my twenties and my thirties, every single one of them.

02:01:57.340 Oh, I believe it.

02:01:58.540 No, it's, it's crazy too.

02:01:59.800 Cause like, you know, these are the girls that will look at me or my lifestyle and think I'm a player.

02:02:04.880 And the truth is I would have been exclusive with this chick.

02:02:07.080 She's my favorite in the rotation.

02:02:08.700 So, and now she, she totally fucked that opportunity.

02:02:10.860 Right.

02:02:11.260 But like, it's, that's the hilarious part that girls don't realize is like, no, even guys who like spin plates, like for the, if a girl,

02:02:18.460 shows enough qualities, like eventually we got shit to do, right?

02:02:23.040 Like exactly.

02:02:24.100 We got shit to do.

02:02:24.920 I would rather college or graduation.

02:02:27.180 You can give them my handle too.

02:02:29.100 Oh, nevermind.

02:02:31.660 If they're 18, 18 on their birthday and above.

02:02:36.180 All right.

02:02:36.880 Bye.

02:02:37.120 Bye.

02:02:38.680 All right.

02:02:39.320 Let's get talking to you.

02:02:40.680 Yeah, I know.

02:02:41.320 I do.

02:02:41.680 I do have three sisters, fellas in the chat, but stay away.

02:02:45.780 Yeah.

02:02:46.020 We're not.

02:02:47.440 Anyways.

02:02:47.840 Um, thanks so much for watching.

02:02:50.700 Doug MP, any final thoughts on mothers?

02:02:53.900 Uh, guys, once you become an adult and you pay your own bills, you don't owe your mother anything, man.

02:03:00.480 And you're able to set the rules and regulations that people have to abide by socially to be able to interact with you.

02:03:06.660 If your mother's a scumbag, she's a scumbag and you don't have to deal with it.

02:03:10.720 So this whole, man, once you're an adult, you get to decide.

02:03:14.400 So don't let your woman, you know, don't let your mother treat you like garbage.

02:03:18.820 Don't do it.

02:03:19.380 Mm-hmm.

02:03:20.660 All right.

02:03:21.300 Thanks so much for calling in, Doug MPI.

02:03:23.840 It's a pleasure as always.

02:03:25.540 Guys, please like the video on your way out and subscribe.

02:03:28.440 And it's the last day.

02:03:29.820 Shiv is going to download all of the active emails to put into the school group.

02:03:34.320 So the school group tomorrow, um, it's the app school and we're going to put in, um, basically the education part of our platform is going on to there.

02:03:45.620 So whoever's on the Audacity website as a thank you for supporting me the last year, I will put you guys, um, also into the school group.

02:03:56.680 This is going to be a high-end group worth, um, it's going to cost a couple grand to get in.

02:04:00.980 Right now you can get it for a hundred bucks a year, ten bucks a month on the 15th.

02:04:04.980 You're not going to be able to get that.

02:04:06.420 And I do mean it this time.

02:04:07.900 Um, also if you want to donate to the documentary, feel free.

02:04:10.720 And if you are interested in a large donation, please email me just pearly things at gmail.com.

02:04:15.180 Thanks so much for watching and I'll see you guys next time.

02:04:17.240 Bye.

02:04:30.980 Bye.

02:05:00.980 Bye.

JustPearlyThings - May 14, 2025

Happy Single Mother's Day (Call-in Show) ｜ Pearl Daily

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