JustPearlyThings - October 24, 2023


He Got Fat Checked On Body Positivity


Episode Stats

Length

10 minutes

Words per Minute

218.01723

Word Count

2,312

Sentence Count

238

Misogynist Sentences

16

Hate Speech Sentences

7


Summary

In this episode, the lads talk about height, height shame and why women should or shouldn t date someone who is shorter than them. Also, we discuss the difference between being chubby and obese, and whether or not they should be dating someone with bigger bones.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 That's an unfortunate end.
00:00:00.900 I have been in a relationship with a person that is shorter than me.
00:00:06.420 Just one.
00:00:07.680 Pardon?
00:00:08.460 Just one.
00:00:09.860 Just one? What does that mean?
00:00:11.140 One person who is shorter than you.
00:00:12.740 Just one relationship or multiple.
00:00:14.680 I'm talking about the person that was short.
00:00:17.340 Yeah, just one person.
00:00:18.360 How many short guys have you been out with?
00:00:20.240 One person.
00:00:21.180 Just one short guy?
00:00:21.900 One short guy.
00:00:23.100 Okay, that makes sense.
00:00:24.300 How many relationships have you had?
00:00:26.840 He's the first one question to ask Goyal.
00:00:28.200 What do you mean it's a personal question?
00:00:32.180 Is it so bad to ask you how many relationships?
00:00:34.580 Is that a bad thing now?
00:00:35.660 No, it ain't.
00:00:36.780 Okay, sorry.
00:00:37.720 I got defensive, sorry.
00:00:39.400 Don't worry, don't worry.
00:00:40.400 We got this.
00:00:41.340 Was it just one short guy?
00:00:42.720 One short relationship?
00:00:44.060 He's the first person I dated I was in a relationship with.
00:00:48.080 Okay, fair enough.
00:00:49.900 So you dated the height challenge that?
00:00:51.760 No, we didn't.
00:00:52.560 We weren't in a relationship.
00:00:54.500 How did it go?
00:00:55.660 How short was he?
00:00:56.440 I love how you guys just made the height.
00:00:58.200 Because no one's going to call us out for height shame.
00:01:01.760 It doesn't happen.
00:01:02.940 This is the new thing.
00:01:03.740 He was 5'6", I believe, and I'm 5'11".
00:01:07.260 Oh, wow.
00:01:08.080 Wow.
00:01:08.820 Yeah.
00:01:09.340 That's it.
00:01:09.760 Did you have to pick him up to hug him?
00:01:11.500 Don't be mean.
00:01:12.340 Don't be mean.
00:01:13.380 Don't be mean.
00:01:14.240 Don't do that.
00:01:15.240 Do you know what it is?
00:01:15.760 Do you know what it is, yeah?
00:01:16.440 Do you know what it is, yeah?
00:01:17.040 Don't be mean.
00:01:17.700 I find it absolutely wild.
00:01:19.820 It's a bit awkward, though, especially if a woman wears heels at that height as well.
00:01:23.380 That, like, listen, if this clip goes out and I was weight shaming someone, I'd be cancelled.
00:01:29.080 Yeah.
00:01:29.240 But you see the short jokes.
00:01:29.840 But height's a new thing, though.
00:01:30.920 For some reason, they keep going under the radar.
00:01:32.540 Pun intended.
00:01:33.160 Do you get it?
00:01:33.480 Yeah.
00:01:33.940 I'm just like, what are we doing there?
00:01:35.420 I'm just like...
00:01:35.800 But the thing is, men don't...
00:01:37.000 Why is no one upset?
00:01:37.600 Hold on, hold on.
00:01:38.000 Let's flip the coin here.
00:01:39.660 Do you find it weird if a woman's taller than you?
00:01:42.240 No.
00:01:42.620 No.
00:01:43.120 Oh, exactly.
00:01:43.840 So why is that, though?
00:01:45.140 Why is that between men and women we have, like...
00:01:47.160 But would you date an overweight woman?
00:01:49.280 Oh, shit.
00:01:49.780 There we go.
00:01:50.500 There we go.
00:01:51.120 It's got a better question than that.
00:01:52.120 So hold on, hold on, hold on.
00:01:53.720 Overweight and obese are two different things.
00:01:56.400 Yeah?
00:01:57.600 Are you talking overweight or obese?
00:02:00.480 Yeah, cool.
00:02:01.680 There's two different things.
00:02:03.560 What's the difference?
00:02:03.920 There's overweight.
00:02:04.540 Okay, obese is extremely overweight for your height, BMI, whatever it is, even though everyone
00:02:10.800 says that the BMI is...
00:02:11.660 Like a few extra pounds, like a bit chubbs?
00:02:13.460 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, obese is extremely
00:02:15.520 overweight.
00:02:16.940 Okay.
00:02:17.220 So you're not just a little bit chubby, a little bit of a few pounds.
00:02:20.100 That's 300 pounds.
00:02:20.780 Yeah, a little bit of cupping right here.
00:02:22.200 No, no, that's none of that.
00:02:23.240 It's excessive.
00:02:24.420 300 pounds.
00:02:25.100 Being overweight is just...
00:02:26.980 You're about to die.
00:02:27.500 Your BMI could be, like, X, and then you're literally, like, two specks above the X.
00:02:31.340 Okay, so answer the question.
00:02:32.580 Someone as big as Lizzo, would you date them?
00:02:35.640 Do you have a motive first?
00:02:38.080 Respectfully, no.
00:02:38.700 I respect the confidence, but respectfully...
00:02:40.640 What confidence?
00:02:41.580 Why?
00:02:41.940 What is it that you respect?
00:02:43.600 The confidence, isn't it?
00:02:44.560 Like, yo, if you...
00:02:45.940 The confidence to be that unhealthy and encourage other people...
00:02:48.260 Wait, wait, wait.
00:02:48.900 Do they want to bang or date?
00:02:50.560 That's the difference.
00:02:51.460 Now, listen, if you are this person and you are shaped like this...
00:02:54.220 That's the difference.
00:02:54.780 Do your thing.
00:02:55.300 If you're confident in it, do your thing.
00:02:57.560 You think they're naturally shaped like that?
00:03:01.500 I think there's a bad food-to-mouth ratio, but there's not much that I can really say,
00:03:05.780 like, in regards to it.
00:03:06.840 You get it?
00:03:07.220 Like, no one is big bones.
00:03:11.140 No one is big bones.
00:03:12.260 We've seen the skeletons.
00:03:13.420 No one is big bones.
00:03:14.360 So we do understand that a lot...
00:03:17.380 No, no, no.
00:03:17.720 What you're about to do is you're about to say, oh, there's some complications and blah,
00:03:22.260 blah, blah.
00:03:22.540 No, you're talking about anomalies.
00:03:24.520 The vast majority of people that are overweight...
00:03:25.880 Oh, I love how you know me already.
00:03:27.160 I know, because you're about to probably...
00:03:28.460 You know me already.
00:03:29.320 The vast majority of people that are overweight, from what I understand, it's just a bad food-to-mouth
00:03:32.940 ratio.
00:03:33.240 And we completely understand that.
00:03:34.840 If you're happy within yourself, do your thing.
00:03:37.500 I've got no problem with me.
00:03:39.100 But you can't expect me...
00:03:39.920 Okay, I want to stop you right there.
00:03:40.820 I want to stop you right there.
00:03:41.720 Go ahead.
00:03:41.880 So your philosophy is that if you're happy in yourself, then that's okay.
00:03:46.760 So would you then encourage someone who, say, has an unhealthy drug addiction?
00:03:52.340 Oh, but they're happy in themselves, so you do you.
00:03:55.720 No.
00:03:56.800 It's not my life.
00:03:57.900 If you're happy within yourself, I'm not going to give you any advice in regards to it.
00:03:59.960 What about if it's a friend or someone you love?
00:04:01.360 If it's my friend, that's someone I care about, then of course I'm going to take an actual
00:04:04.980 caring thing.
00:04:05.200 Okay, I have a question for everyone.
00:04:06.280 If the man were overweight, I would tell the man, my bro, your belly kind of hanging over
00:04:10.900 the belt.
00:04:11.640 Your thing is moving kind of mad.
00:04:13.280 Like, my bro.
00:04:14.060 I'm going to par you.
00:04:15.200 Don't get it twisted.
00:04:16.200 But we're then going to go to the gym together, and we're going to bang it out.
00:04:19.320 And we're going to make sure you get to where you need to be.
00:04:21.040 We're not just going to leave you and be like, oh my gosh, body positivity, you look
00:04:24.260 so good in that dress that doesn't fit.
00:04:25.840 This doesn't surprise me that a male is giving this answer, so I want to hear what the girls
00:04:29.340 think.
00:04:30.420 Simple question.
00:04:31.820 Would you tell your girlfriend if she's fat?
00:04:34.160 I would tell people.
00:04:35.200 I'm real.
00:04:36.340 So whatever's going on that doesn't benefit them, I will say it to them.
00:04:39.480 But each person is different.
00:04:41.740 It depends on how you deliver things.
00:04:43.060 But yeah, I'm real.
00:04:43.920 If there's something going on, if you're drinking too much, if you're doing this too much, if you're
00:04:47.020 eating too much, you're not looking good too much, I will say it for their own
00:04:50.860 benefit, not for my own.
00:04:52.020 But it depends on how you deliver it.
00:04:53.160 That's the problem people have.
00:04:54.240 I call CAP.
00:04:55.160 I call CAP.
00:04:55.400 Same, same.
00:04:56.300 And the reason why I call CAP is because you actually didn't answer the question.
00:04:59.180 You said a whole lot of different things.
00:05:01.300 She asked a straight question.
00:05:02.660 Yes.
00:05:03.080 Would you tell your friends if they're fat?
00:05:05.160 You didn't have to start saying, well, there's a way to...
00:05:06.680 She did a whole story.
00:05:07.760 You didn't answer the question.
00:05:08.760 I'm giving a relevant story, but yes.
00:05:11.760 Yeah.
00:05:12.400 You tell your friend if they're fat?
00:05:13.820 They tell me all the time if I look ugly.
00:05:15.180 I'll tell them if they look a bit, you know?
00:05:17.820 Your friends tell you when they think you look ugly?
00:05:19.400 Yeah.
00:05:19.740 You sound like you've got good friends.
00:05:21.080 Yeah, they are very good friends.
00:05:22.260 Shout out.
00:05:24.360 I will not.
00:05:27.520 Wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:05:29.620 Let her speak.
00:05:30.640 Let her land.
00:05:31.820 I was actually initially finished since we need just to give a short answer.
00:05:36.500 But if I need to elaborate, if a person, if my friend is fat, I will not tell her that
00:05:41.860 you are fat, why will I say that?
00:05:44.060 So you're going to make her...
00:05:44.940 But if she is unhealthy and I know that she has a health condition that is related to
00:05:51.920 her weight, I'm going to make my way to let her know that we need to get her to work
00:05:57.880 on it.
00:05:58.380 But just saying you're fat, that's not...
00:06:00.740 Okay, but that's what I was...
00:06:01.380 I never said it and I will never say it.
00:06:04.060 I get this.
00:06:04.740 I get this.
00:06:05.140 This is the woman's mentality and I'm a woman.
00:06:08.680 So that's my mentality.
00:06:09.940 That's not about a woman, that's how I think.
00:06:12.340 I think most women, the thought of telling another woman, you're fat.
00:06:15.280 Yeah, it's hurtful.
00:06:17.000 Okay.
00:06:17.600 I wouldn't put it like that either, right?
00:06:20.080 But, okay, let me rephrase it in a feminine way.
00:06:24.240 You have a girlfriend, right?
00:06:26.120 You've been friends for a long, long time.
00:06:28.360 Five to ten years.
00:06:29.900 That means nothing to me.
00:06:30.820 I still get rid of people.
00:06:32.740 Just follow me for a second.
00:06:34.660 Just follow my story.
00:06:35.880 So you're good friends.
00:06:36.640 You've got a great relationship.
00:06:37.940 Forget the time.
00:06:39.080 She's your girl.
00:06:39.700 Now, she's gaining.
00:06:42.400 She is gaining chub, right?
00:06:44.580 She's got a bit of a double chin going.
00:06:46.340 Perhaps when she wears a crop top, half of it's hanging out a bit.
00:06:49.240 You know, she's starting to get the whole arm wings shit going on.
00:06:53.860 Are you letting her know, hey, I've noticed that you're gaining a bit of weight?
00:06:58.860 Yeah.
00:06:59.180 Is everything okay?
00:07:00.260 Is there something we can do here?
00:07:01.700 Or, let's say, let's add another context in here.
00:07:06.900 She's all over Instagram and everything.
00:07:09.300 Say she has a TikTok account, right?
00:07:11.240 And she's one of these body positivity advocates.
00:07:13.600 And she has loads of fans telling her, you go, girl, body positivity, right?
00:07:18.060 So she's continually gaining weight.
00:07:21.200 Eating food.
00:07:22.520 Yes.
00:07:23.160 That's how people gain weight.
00:07:24.660 She's continuing to gain weight because she's being body positive.
00:07:28.740 And she wants to stop the idea of fat shaming.
00:07:32.740 What are you doing?
00:07:34.780 I think as a good friend, you obviously need to be like, look, like friend to friend.
00:07:41.920 I think, you know, you've, you know, like respectfully and like not, you can't just be like you're fat.
00:07:47.680 Like respectfully.
00:07:48.640 I mean, you can.
00:07:50.220 If you're a good friend, yeah, of course you can.
00:07:51.420 I'm sure if I started getting fat, Pearl would say to me, girl, you're getting fat.
00:07:54.180 But I don't think most girls would put it like that.
00:07:55.980 Because people get, like people sensitive, especially women, they're quite sensitive.
00:08:00.620 So obviously tell them in a way that, you know, respectfully, look, I think, you know, you need to slow down, whatever you may say.
00:08:08.460 But then at the same time, you give them what you give them.
00:08:10.940 But if they're deciding to listen to other people and do this whole thing, that's up to them.
00:08:15.200 I have a question.
00:08:16.360 Is it actually, because I'm kind of torn now.
00:08:20.080 I know it's feminine nature to put it nicely, right?
00:08:23.440 But actually thinking about it, right?
00:08:25.120 If I'm this girl and I'm getting fat, and I see no problem with it.
00:08:29.660 I'm like, I feel good.
00:08:30.720 I'm body positive.
00:08:31.580 And my friend comes to me.
00:08:32.640 She says, look, I've noticed you're gaining weight.
00:08:34.760 Is there anything we can do to help?
00:08:37.040 That's not really going to prompt me to change.
00:08:38.800 Actually, if my friend came to me and went, you are fat.
00:08:41.680 What is going on?
00:08:43.020 That's going to prompt me to change.
00:08:44.260 So actually, as women, are we actually harming each other with this feminine niceness?
00:08:49.580 Would it not be better for us if we were more harsh, like how men are with each other?
00:08:53.040 Like, bro, you're getting fat.
00:08:54.760 We're going to the gym.
00:08:55.760 Would it not be actually better for us if we were able to speak to each other the same
00:08:59.440 way that men speak to each other?
00:09:00.780 Can I just say, yeah, you lot would never survive a Call of Duty lobby in 2012.
00:09:07.060 Yeah?
00:09:07.800 You would never survive it.
00:09:09.720 It doesn't make any sense.
00:09:10.920 See, I'm Albanian, I'm surviving, I'm good, yeah.
00:09:13.320 Yeah, you're built different still, we understand that, man, it's a little bit different.
00:09:16.500 But listen, when you go into these lobbies, and you're being called everything under the
00:09:20.980 sun, listen, you don't even know I'm black, but I'm being called the N-word before I've
00:09:25.680 even said anything.
00:09:26.500 How did you know?
00:09:28.360 How did you know?
00:09:29.760 What I'm trying to say is, I feel like, if I'm coddling you, and I'm like, oh my gosh.
00:09:36.040 That's not going to help, though.
00:09:37.000 That is not going to help.
00:09:37.560 You're getting slightly chubby.
00:09:39.180 Oh my goodness.
00:09:40.100 Can we sort it out?
00:09:42.100 I think people can be harsh.
00:09:42.800 That's not going to motivate you to do anything.
00:09:44.940 But listen, people can be harsh.
00:09:46.340 You can be nice in the beginning.
00:09:47.820 You can explain things.
00:09:48.640 So you never know the reason to why somebody is gaining weight.
00:09:51.340 And I'm talking from experience.
00:09:52.360 I've had thyroid problems, which affect my hormones, which then can affect our weight,
00:09:57.100 right?
00:09:57.460 So somebody might not know what's going on, but they are putting on weight, and they are unconsciously
00:10:01.520 a bit scared maybe to talk about their health problems, or whatever it is.
00:10:04.660 But then when you talk about a situation where someone's deliberately doing the same behavioural
00:10:08.080 pattern, eating the same crappy foods, and carrying on with that behaviour, and you don't
00:10:14.060 address it, you're a shit friend, in my opinion.
00:10:16.360 If you deliver it in a certain way to understand what the root cause is, and you understand the
00:10:19.680 root cause is them just eating crap, then maybe have a different approach.
00:10:24.040 But again, this is what I meant.
00:10:25.340 The circumstance can be different.
00:10:26.700 I see what you're saying, but I want to argue the point that at the end of the day,
00:10:30.440 how much does the root cause really matter?
00:10:32.900 The root cause again.