JustPearlyThings - I Regret This…… ｜ Let’s Talk About God

00:00:00.160 What up, guys? Welcome to the Just Pearly Things YouTube channel, and welcome to Morning Coffee Thoughts, where I get my thoughts over morning coffee.

00:00:07.060 Today, I don't have coffee, but I do have a Kamucha, so, you know, let me know your favorite morning drink in the comments.

00:00:13.820 An interesting thing I've been doing this week, I've been trying to get more carnivore, and I've been eating like three steaks a day.

00:00:23.080 And guys, I'm starting to see what the carnivore people are saying.

00:00:28.180 Yeah, I've been. You feel a lot more energized, and I'm not even really changing what I eat.

00:00:35.380 I'm just eating more steak right now. We'll see. We'll see if I stick to this. I'm not going to sell dreams.

00:00:40.340 Anyways, so today I wanted to talk about how, really, when I started the channel, I was really focused on, like, what is true.

00:00:52.600 And, really, the channel sort of started when I had, I would watch, like, Myron, I would watch, Kevin Samuels was probably, like, the number one influence on me when it came to starting the channel.

00:01:07.660 I would watch all these different, like, red pill content creators, and I thought they just started such interesting conversations. 0.99

00:01:16.460 So, I would sort of bring the ideas to the girls that were on my volleyball team, and I would red pill them.

00:01:22.480 So, like, there was a girl on my team, her name was Jess, and I would bring her, and then I would show her these videos, and I would ask her what she thought.

00:01:29.520 But, um, and sometimes I realized, and it's really hard not to do this, that in the pursuit of, like, truth, like, I feel like the truth, there's, like, so much anger around it.

00:01:46.320 Because I honestly think the closer I get to the truth, the more I get these, like, personal, crazy, like, attacks, where they just attack me, attack me, attack me.

00:01:55.980 Um, so, when I had this, like, video I did last year with Nick Fuentes, and when I brought Nick Fuentes on, I actually, I feel, like, nervous saying his name because there's just such, like, a visceral reaction to him.

00:02:12.380 But I always have to remind myself that I'm speaking what I know to be true in my experience, and I can't help people's reactions.

00:02:22.960 So, there was, like, this, um, clip that went super viral of me talking about, you know, and the way they would phrase it is, Pearl said that slavery was embellished.

00:02:35.440 That's, like, the way they would put it.

00:02:39.840 And even talking about this, I get very, like, anxious.

00:02:43.460 Like, I'm like, oh, God, please don't come for me, but whatever.

00:02:46.900 And, really, what I was trying to be honest about at the time was how people use atrocities to, like, control people.

00:02:56.400 So, if you say anything about slavery, if you question any of the facts that you see on TV or from historians,

00:03:03.180 they immediately call you racist and all this stuff and then cancel you.

00:03:09.020 They do the same thing with the Holocaust, right? 0.92

00:03:11.980 If you say anything about it, then, boom, all these people will come out and call you anti-Semitic.

00:03:18.180 They do the same thing with women's issues. 1.00

00:03:20.640 If I say, and I get away with it because I'm a woman, but if I was a man and a man came forward and said,

00:03:27.060 oh, um, women didn't want the right to vote or whatever, they would call him a sexist.

00:03:32.220 And they just, it's like a system.

00:03:33.660 And when I started to figure out this system, for all these different issues, it wasn't just slavery,

00:03:40.460 I got this, like, heated, like, like, ah.

00:03:44.360 And I've almost gotten to the point where I, you know, guys, I'm not even a flat earther.

00:03:49.960 But sometimes I think the flat earthers might be right.

00:03:53.400 Only because of this visceral reaction, like, to exploring the topic.

00:03:59.460 Like, people get so angry if you just explore it and say, well, maybe they're this flat.

00:04:07.760 Then they get so angry when it's like, why are we getting angry about these ideas?

00:04:13.460 Let's explore it.

00:04:14.720 I'm not even saying, I'm not even saying it was, but I'm like, I mean, the moon landing does look really fake.

00:04:21.700 I mean, you know.

00:04:23.580 So, in this spring, basically, all these people that I thought, and I'm not saying this to feel bad for myself or anything,

00:04:37.460 because I have a great life, but this is what happened.

00:04:40.920 This clip goes viral.

00:04:43.400 All of these people I thought were my friends, like, I literally thought, like, I was friends with, start turning on me.

00:04:50.320 And these are people that I've known for years.

00:04:55.000 And now they're calling me Colin.

00:04:58.460 Like, people I think I'm friends with, you know.

00:05:02.600 Saying these, like, you know, terrible things about me.

00:05:07.500 And this made me sort of, like, get a little bitter towards London.

00:05:13.180 You know, and I was just like, I just wanted to go home. 0.97

00:05:15.700 I wanted to say, screw it. 0.66

00:05:16.680 I want to be out of this country. 0.79

00:05:18.440 And I wanted to, you know, go to my dad and just, like, go home.

00:05:23.580 Whatever.

00:05:26.340 And I regret letting all of that, like, affect me.

00:05:33.500 Because I just didn't expect people that knew me in real life to do that.

00:05:38.780 So, I really regret not appreciating London.

00:05:42.400 Because I'm part British.

00:05:44.220 Now, I'm not a ton British.

00:05:45.360 But I just, it's really interesting.

00:05:47.460 I've been learning more about, like, my family's history.

00:05:50.740 And my family, I guess, got here on one side.

00:05:53.600 Ten years after the Mayflower.

00:05:54.980 How cool is that?

00:05:56.260 Right?

00:05:56.680 That's pretty cool.

00:05:57.720 Or in the U.S. 0.53

00:05:58.300 But basically, at one point, someone in my family came from Britain.

00:06:03.960 And the cool thing about England, which I've been starting to appreciate, is they just have, like, these old buildings.

00:06:11.200 Like, these old, and, like, it's almost, like, divine, some of the buildings here.

00:06:15.560 Like, they are, like, inspired by God.

00:06:19.040 And I've almost started to think that maybe America wasn't this, like, Christian nation that we thought.

00:06:28.640 And maybe America, like, actually was ungodly.

00:06:33.520 And I know this idea kind of makes me sad because growing up, there was all this, like, patriotism.

00:06:41.360 Like, I grew up in rural Illinois, like, an hour from Chicago.

00:06:48.040 I mean, not rural, rural, but, like, my mom's family is from, like, rural, rural, super out in the middle of nowhere, Wisconsin.

00:06:56.140 So, I grew up around people that were really patriotic and really, like, just America and, like, it's a Christian nation, whatever.

00:07:07.000 But I started to think that maybe the natural order of the world, okay?

00:07:11.700 And I've been playing around with this idea, so don't quote me on this.

00:07:15.480 But it goes, God, men, women, children.

00:07:18.300 In America, the government is separated from God.

00:07:31.500 And maybe the government is actually meant to go here.

00:07:35.340 It's supposed to go, God, government, men, women, children. 0.95

00:07:38.840 And I had this thought when I found out that the U.S. actually led in divorce even when it was just the colonies.

00:07:45.700 And the British were, like, appalled by the sorts of, like, sodominary, however you say that, stuff that was going on in the colonies.

00:07:58.680 So, okay, I'm, like, putting two and two together.

00:08:03.440 When capitalism, which I grew up always thinking that was amazing and awesome, okay?

00:08:09.340 I always just thought capitalism, the market corrects itself.

00:08:12.960 And I'm not saying it's not.

00:08:14.440 I think that you shouldn't have a bunch of government regulation.

00:08:19.700 And I don't, again, I'm just playing with ideas.

00:08:21.820 So, please do not quote me and clip me and whatever.

00:08:25.560 But when you put money, capitalism basically puts money at the top of everything.

00:08:32.940 And when you do that, my thought is, I think it's almost a disservice. 0.95

00:08:38.520 And that's when you, like, when I look at all of the shit that's wrong with society today, I don't know if I believe in these, like, evil elites that were, like, had this grand plan to ruin the country or the world or whatever. 0.94

00:08:53.980 I almost think they just thought we would make more money if we did this. 0.98

00:08:57.960 So, I'll give you an example.

00:09:00.800 Transgenderism. 0.94

00:09:02.520 You know, that stuff, they're basically mutilating autistic people. 0.98

00:09:07.520 It's mostly women in that movement. 1.00

00:09:09.520 I just saw a video.

00:09:10.520 Someone was saying it's more men turning into women.

00:09:13.100 It's not.

00:09:13.600 It's more women turning into men. 0.96

00:09:14.820 And it's usually autistic children that, like, find this and think it's a solution. 0.99

00:09:20.780 Like, basically, the transgender movement puts the solutions to a normal autistic kid's, a normal autistic girl's problems as transgenderism. 0.90

00:09:32.980 Like, the lack of friends, connection, you know, like, fitting in, whatever.

00:09:37.980 And really, I don't think these doctors thought, went in thinking we want to destroy people.

00:09:48.860 I think they just thought I can make a good chunk of change doing this.

00:09:54.440 And if we had a government that was God and the government were intertwined, there was no separation of, like, state and religion.

00:10:04.960 They would just outright vanish things.

00:10:07.980 And I almost think the problem when the U.S. became a money-first country is that then the governments that were God-first could not compete.

00:10:19.260 Because in that example, they're going to make more money doing that.

00:10:24.060 They won't not make an atomic bomb because there's money at the end of it.

00:10:29.420 And I've almost started to think, take it with a grain of salt, that maybe God and government are meant to be intertwined.

00:10:40.320 And capitalism might actually not be the good thing that we thought it was.

00:10:44.900 So, it's given me, like, a new appreciation for London because you almost see things that are inspired by God where the cities in the U.S. are just, it's very, like, bland for the most part.

00:11:03.860 But you don't really see the, like, beauty that you see here in some of the buildings, especially, like, you know, like, where the palace is, all that stuff.

00:11:14.680 All right, so the next thing I wanted to talk about, because I do bring up God, I wanted to tell you guys about my faith, right?

00:11:30.520 What is Pearl's religion?

00:11:32.160 What is Pearl's faith?

00:11:32.840 And I think there's, like, a lot of confusion on the internet because I've always felt weird about being overly preachy in public about my faith.

00:11:45.140 Now, I know, I know all of the Christians will come in and say, Pearl, but the Bible says, the Bible says you need to be super public and preach. 0.68

00:11:59.060 Now, I don't have any Bible scriptures to back this up, so do not, do not come saying Pearl doesn't know.

00:12:08.940 But sometimes I just follow things that make sense to me and I find out they're biblical later.

00:12:14.660 To me, we have the natural order of the world, right?

00:12:18.600 And weaker men are supposed to submit to stronger men.

00:12:21.960 So, I almost think it's supposed to go.

00:12:24.240 And I guess this didn't really happen for me because my dad is Catholic, but he's not, like, the most religious guy on the planet.

00:12:33.060 But I would think in an ideal family, it would go, the dad submits to the government and, like, works or whatever.

00:12:41.980 And it's funny because my dad isn't the most religious person, but he actually lives in a more religious way than, like, any religious people I know.

00:12:51.480 Like, doesn't drink, works super hard, like, super kind hard. 0.98

00:12:55.580 Like, it's funny because I almost think there's men like my dad out there that would be religious if there wasn't so much bullshit in the church. 0.92

00:13:05.740 Because, like, my dad can't really articulate it in the same way I couldn't articulate it when I was younger and stuff bothered me. 0.95

00:13:13.880 But, like, men are just naturally logical.

00:13:17.620 And if they start getting these, like, weird pastors and priests that are just, like, emotional and preaching shit that doesn't make sense, they'll just naturally kind of leave. 0.59

00:13:27.240 Anyways, but I would think the natural order of the world is in, like, religion is the dad is supposed to seek, follow God and seek truth, right? 0.94

00:13:39.920 And he's supposed to submit to stronger men.

00:13:42.140 And he's supposed to learn, like, we should have a bunch of scholars out there.

00:13:46.360 And I'm sure we do, but they're not as, like, common as I would imagine they would have been, like, 100, 200 years ago.

00:13:52.580 That have dedicated their life to seeking what is true and finding the truth out about the Bible.

00:13:59.040 Okay, imagine.

00:14:00.800 Those men teach all of the other men.

00:14:04.400 And the men in their families, like, they teach their daughters.

00:14:08.980 And that's kind of the way, like, the ideal way it should go.

00:14:14.100 And I almost look at it like somebody that starts preaching too soon does more harm than good.

00:14:22.580 The same way, like, a personal trainer or diet nutritionist that doesn't really do their due diligence.

00:14:34.360 You know, now people are doing carnivore.

00:14:36.800 And I'm sort of trying to dabble in that.

00:14:39.940 I'm not going to say I'm in it.

00:14:41.120 But, and they're finding out that was true.

00:14:44.260 When growing up, we heard that you're supposed to eat the most carbs.

00:14:47.520 And all of the personal trainers that told people to do the food triangle with all the carbs led more people to obesity rather than fitness because they were teaching the wrong thing.

00:15:01.020 And I would never want to be in a position where I am doing more harm than good because I am not 100% sure with what is true and what isn't true.

00:15:13.920 So, a couple of years ago, I really wanted to figure out, like, what was true.

00:15:22.160 And I wrote, I remember a couple of years ago, I wrote down all the religions because I was like, what religion am I?

00:15:32.260 And I wanted to know, and I wanted to know.

00:15:33.800 And at the time, I wrote down Christian, Muslim, Catholic, Buddhist, Christian, Muslim, Catholic, Buddhist, and Jewish.

00:15:47.660 And I actually remember wanting to be Jewish because I'm a natural skeptic, and then I didn't have to believe in the miracles. 0.96

00:15:58.360 I found out later that was wrong because there's miracles in the Old Testament.

00:16:03.580 But, you know, I remember reading about, like, what it took to be Jewish.

00:16:10.600 And it was really difficult to convert, and I thought, it's, like, a lot of work when really it's, like, a one out of five chance.

00:16:26.660 Oh, I put Catholic, too.

00:16:28.040 Sorry, guys.

00:16:30.480 But, okay, so I kind of just thought, and then it was, like, through the bloodline, and I'm like,

00:16:38.060 I don't even think I can become Jewish anyway, so I just sort of, I just sort of X'd that one off.

00:16:44.840 And I also X'd it off because it didn't make sense to me that Jesus was not God.

00:16:52.720 It didn't make sense to me.

00:16:54.180 And the reason it didn't make sense to me was because I felt like if this guy was so well-known a thousand years later,

00:17:05.720 and he came before, like, it just didn't make sense that we built all of this stuff off of this guy that was not God.

00:17:15.520 Now, this could be flawed thinking, but this is what, this is why.

00:17:24.080 Now, I basically, at the time, I saw a lot of what was probably more Western propaganda,

00:17:31.060 and it made me more rule out, like, the Muslim countries because my thought was, like, at the time, you know,

00:17:38.820 I was more of, like, capitalist.

00:17:41.000 I thought the West was, like, godsend.

00:17:43.320 I thought the West was, like, amazing.

00:17:44.800 And so I ruled out the Muslim and Buddhism because I just felt like the countries that seemed to follow God had more prosperity.

00:17:56.560 That sort of made sense to me at the time.

00:17:59.000 Not saying this was the right train of thought.

00:18:01.420 This is just what I was thinking.

00:18:03.060 So it left me with Catholicism and Christianity.

00:18:06.380 And at the time, I actually picked Christianity, and I went to a Christian church for, like, two, three years,

00:18:15.800 and I was super involved in it.

00:18:17.440 I lived with, like, a Christian family, and I really am, like, they're honestly a phenomenal church.

00:18:25.660 But I still noticed some, I didn't know it was feminism at the time, 1.00

00:18:32.460 but they're, like, the men were not masculine in that church.

00:18:39.040 And there was just something that felt, like, off.

00:18:44.860 That's the only way I could put it.

00:18:48.020 And I kept having the question come back to my mind,

00:18:51.580 which is how do we know what is true and what isn't true?

00:18:55.060 And to me, it does not make sense to have every person just read the Bible and decide for themselves.

00:19:02.460 The reason being that, I mean, there's some gross misinterpretations of the Bible 0.98

00:19:11.320 that are absolute bullshit and start wars. 0.98

00:19:15.840 So that's what led me to Catholicism. 1.00

00:19:18.920 To basically stay Catholic was because, I mean, I'm a little biased.

00:19:26.600 I grew up Catholic.

00:19:27.640 But because it made more sense to have an institution of,

00:19:35.800 and at the time I didn't really think about the natural order of the world,

00:19:39.080 like, none of this was in my head,

00:19:40.300 but it made more sense to have, like, an institution.

00:19:43.740 And to this day, that still makes,

00:19:46.640 the problem is institutions do get corrupt,

00:19:49.380 and it's hard to not question your faith as a Catholic

00:19:52.720 when the Pope is who the Pope is.

00:19:57.780 I mean, we can't look at this and not say that's immoral.

00:20:01.500 My grandma would be rolling in her grave right now. 1.00

00:20:05.940 So now,

00:20:08.860 I still think the institution makes the most sense

00:20:14.200 and having a group of the, like, most wise, well-read,

00:20:19.920 and, like, competent men that come together.

00:20:24.620 But I question how an institution guided by God

00:20:30.200 could get this corrupt.

00:20:31.680 So that's kind of where I am

00:20:37.500 in, I guess, my, like, faith journey.

00:20:43.400 And so, and I guess the reason I don't preach

00:20:48.360 or I don't make it public is, like,

00:20:50.880 which it is public, but not, like, crazy public,

00:20:54.140 is two reasons.

00:20:55.380 I almost think that people that do that

00:20:57.800 without a fundamental understanding

00:21:01.080 and knowledge of everything they believe,

00:21:04.020 it's almost to glorify themselves more than God.

00:21:07.900 Because I would think that the step to converting people

00:21:12.100 is know your faith first.

00:21:18.260 So know your faith.

00:21:20.680 So what do you believe?

00:21:21.920 Why do you believe it?

00:21:23.640 Two,

00:21:23.980 stop sinning

00:21:27.200 plus live super holy

00:21:31.420 and then three,

00:21:37.640 preach,

00:21:38.560 which I don't even really think women should preach, 1.00

00:21:40.920 so I don't know if I ever will,

00:21:42.960 but, okay,

00:21:44.160 know your faith.

00:21:45.980 So, and when I think of this

00:21:47.880 in terms of, like, Paul,

00:21:50.100 I know he had, like, God come down

00:21:54.080 and, like, he stopped,

00:21:55.260 he first had to realize he was a believer

00:21:58.220 and that he knew that he had faith.

00:22:01.580 Stops, he had to stop sinning

00:22:03.080 and then lived super holy.

00:22:05.360 And then he preached

00:22:06.420 and converted a bunch of people.

00:22:07.840 So,

00:22:08.720 and I think that's why

00:22:10.760 when we see these influencers

00:22:12.400 do these, like,

00:22:13.340 overnight, 0.93

00:22:14.560 I was a porn star 0.80

00:22:16.280 and now I'm a practicing Catholic, 0.97

00:22:20.680 you almost don't believe it

00:22:23.620 because real change takes time.

00:22:27.500 Now,

00:22:28.520 when I was in college,

00:22:30.200 I was,

00:22:31.780 I drank a lot,

00:22:34.760 a lot,

00:22:35.600 not,

00:22:35.880 not like a ton,

00:22:37.120 but I was more of a drinker,

00:22:38.900 you know,

00:22:39.220 the last, like, two years.

00:22:42.500 And really,

00:22:43.840 to break that habit,

00:22:44.940 I had to get away

00:22:46.280 from all that stuff

00:22:47.440 and not,

00:22:49.260 now it's like,

00:22:49.880 it doesn't even bother me.

00:22:51.120 Like, I don't,

00:22:52.260 I don't care.

00:22:53.540 Like,

00:22:53.820 I could have a bunch

00:22:55.360 of alcohol here.

00:22:56.580 I can have a glass of wine

00:22:58.540 from time to time.

00:22:59.620 I'm not gonna get

00:23:00.520 super messed up.

00:23:02.040 Like,

00:23:02.340 it's totally fine.

00:23:04.500 Um,

00:23:05.220 but,

00:23:05.860 like,

00:23:06.180 I think about

00:23:06.860 how hard it was

00:23:07.780 to break that habit.

00:23:09.680 Now,

00:23:10.320 I'm trying to quit coffee

00:23:12.220 and oh my God,

00:23:13.460 you guys have seen

00:23:15.240 my morning coffee thoughts

00:23:16.440 for two years

00:23:17.320 of me saying,

00:23:18.480 I am addicted to sugar,

00:23:19.520 I'm addicted to coffee.

00:23:21.200 And,

00:23:22.280 you've seen how unsuccessful

00:23:24.460 and how hard

00:23:25.400 it has been to change.

00:23:27.120 And I think

00:23:27.760 when you have

00:23:28.200 this super degenerate lifestyle,

00:23:30.840 when,

00:23:32.120 the idea that you can

00:23:33.820 just change overnight,

00:23:35.900 it's not the most

00:23:39.000 believable thing.

00:23:40.200 I think

00:23:42.400 when people

00:23:43.360 really do change,

00:23:44.520 it's actually

00:23:44.920 really difficult.

00:23:46.100 And it's more difficult

00:23:47.360 the longer you've done it.

00:23:48.640 So,

00:23:48.820 I really only drank

00:23:49.740 for like,

00:23:50.960 I don't know,

00:23:51.860 two,

00:23:52.180 three years.

00:23:54.040 And that was

00:23:54.900 pretty hard to quit.

00:23:55.780 Imagine doing something

00:23:56.660 for 10 and 15.

00:23:58.320 And I remember

00:23:59.200 having the thought

00:24:00.660 that I should get

00:24:02.040 a hold of this habit

00:24:03.040 because

00:24:03.600 people that do it

00:24:06.400 for like 10 years,

00:24:07.740 they,

00:24:07.760 I mean,

00:24:08.360 how do you think

00:24:08.900 we have all these

00:24:09.400 alcoholic mothers? 1.00

00:24:10.740 You know what I mean?

00:24:13.600 So,

00:24:14.640 yeah,

00:24:16.360 so that's why

00:24:17.460 I don't

00:24:18.740 go out

00:24:20.160 and start preaching

00:24:21.180 because I really think

00:24:22.260 I have to figure out

00:24:23.500 what I believe

00:24:24.980 and why I believe it.

00:24:27.080 Catholic still makes 1.00

00:24:28.220 the most sense to me,

00:24:29.980 but I still have questions.

00:24:32.820 And,

00:24:33.520 you know,

00:24:35.080 it's not like

00:24:35.960 I live a super crazy lifestyle,

00:24:37.820 but I,

00:24:38.520 but I think

00:24:39.140 I have things

00:24:39.840 I should work on.

00:24:40.600 I'm super impatient.

00:24:42.600 I get agitated

00:24:43.820 kind of easily.

00:24:45.640 And,

00:24:46.240 you know,

00:24:48.040 I think,

00:24:50.080 I think,

00:24:50.840 I almost think

00:24:51.340 that stuff comes first

00:24:52.860 before you start preaching

00:24:54.340 because otherwise,

00:24:57.480 to the same way

00:24:58.140 the personal trainer

00:24:59.300 can lead more people

00:25:00.860 to destruction

00:25:01.700 if they're not,

00:25:02.880 if they don't know

00:25:03.680 the right things,

00:25:04.420 I almost feel

00:25:05.560 the same way

00:25:06.140 about religion.

00:25:07.760 Anyways,

00:25:08.560 these are just

00:25:09.600 my thoughts today.

00:25:11.060 These thoughts

00:25:11.800 could change over time.

00:25:14.980 I don't act like

00:25:16.480 I have all the answers,

00:25:17.620 but let me know

00:25:18.060 what you guys think

00:25:18.700 in the comments.

00:25:20.100 Like the video

00:25:20.660 on your way out,

00:25:21.300 subscribe to the channel,

00:25:22.300 and I'll talk to you

00:25:22.860 next time.

JustPearlyThings - October 29, 2023

I Regret This…… ｜ Let’s Talk About God

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