JustPearlyThings - November 08, 2023


Instagram Baddie SNITCHES On Herself in REAL TIME


Episode Stats


Length

12 minutes

Words per minute

218.64552

Word count

2,812

Sentence count

313

Harmful content

Misogyny

46

sentences flagged

Toxicity

12

sentences flagged

Hate speech

20

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, we discuss the controversial topic of women posting bikini pictures on social media. Should they be allowed to do so or shouldn't they? Do they have the right to post them or should they be taken down?

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 I just don't see it as a situation.
00:00:00.920 I just don't think it's a situation.
00:00:03.580 I just, yeah, exactly.
00:00:04.980 I just, I see her as a woman who has all the rights in the world to do whatever she wants. 0.99
00:00:09.760 I didn't say she doesn't have the right to.
00:00:11.740 I said, this is about should.
00:00:14.340 So, like, is this appropriate for a wife and a mother?
00:00:18.300 Why do you think she's doing it? 0.92
00:00:19.940 What is her goal with this?
00:00:22.320 She could be an OnlyFans model. 1.00
00:00:23.880 To show off her figure. 0.94
00:00:24.920 To show off her figure. 0.94
00:00:25.840 Exactly, that's the problem.
00:00:26.820 Yeah, I would say validation.
00:00:28.880 It's something like this, guys.
00:00:30.560 So, imagine, like, I use Facebook, so I'm old, so you guys probably don't use Facebook.
00:00:34.280 Yeah.
00:00:34.620 And I have something.
00:00:35.520 I use Facebook.
00:00:36.320 I have something on my Facebook called Facebook feed, or I'll scroll through.
00:00:39.080 And so, I'm married, and so, who was on my Facebook feed?
00:00:42.280 Like, my Halloween 11 years ago was a soft course site on Facebook,
00:00:45.300 because all the girls were in kitten outfits and mini skirts as nurses. 1.00
00:00:48.240 Now it's all moms, right? 0.99
00:00:49.640 So, who I have on my Facebook are the mutual friends of myself and my wife and our neighbors.
00:00:54.680 Now, I think to myself, like, if I'm scrolling through my Facebook feed,
00:00:57.660 and I see the neighbor's wife posting pictures like that in her bikini,
00:01:01.960 and I wonder what my wife would think about that.
00:01:04.220 Like, I wonder what my wife is thinking.
00:01:05.560 Like, huh, the neighbor's wife, who's also connected to my husband on Facebook,
00:01:08.440 is posting pictures of herself in a bikini.
00:01:10.840 How would you guys feel about that?
00:01:12.160 If your husband's Facebook feed was showing the neighbor's wife dressed like that,
00:01:16.900 how would you feel, honestly?
00:01:17.940 It probably does.
00:01:19.160 Wait, I have a question for you.
00:01:21.920 Would it be wrong for your husband to like that picture?
00:01:25.800 Hell yeah.
00:01:29.440 Well...
00:01:29.880 And why don't you get an issue with the picture?
00:01:31.460 So, would it be wrong for another woman's husband to like that picture with you then?
00:01:36.120 Because you're just doing it for yourself to show your figure.
00:01:38.300 So, I mean, that's a...
00:01:39.560 No, I've completely just contradicted myself.
00:01:41.580 Like, completely.
00:01:42.660 I don't see a problem with her posting that.
00:01:44.560 But at the same time, of course not.
00:01:46.280 There's boundaries.
00:01:47.020 You can still look at a picture.
00:01:48.060 You don't have to press like.
00:01:49.420 You don't have to message her.
00:01:51.020 You don't have to post it.
00:01:51.940 You don't have to.
00:01:52.560 You don't...
00:01:53.040 No, you don't.
00:01:53.640 You don't have to.
00:01:54.880 You don't have to follow her.
00:01:55.720 Like, like...
00:01:56.880 See what you like.
00:01:58.060 Follow what you don't...
00:01:59.040 If you don't want to see that, don't follow it.
00:02:00.580 Go at her. 1.00
00:02:01.040 Exactly.
00:02:01.280 Simple as that.
00:02:01.580 If you don't like it, don't follow her.
00:02:02.600 So, if you post that and then other men...
00:02:05.480 Like, you're married and you post that and other men like it and your husband's like,
00:02:08.020 hey, take it down.
00:02:08.640 And other men liking your photo, you're like, sorry, no, it's for me.
00:02:10.780 I do it for myself.
00:02:11.600 No, I take that down.
00:02:12.300 Are you going to tell that to your husband?
00:02:14.320 No.
00:02:14.740 No.
00:02:15.100 If I'm going to be honest, I would probably just go, do you know what?
00:02:17.020 I respect that because if you did that and I wanted you to take it down, I would expect
00:02:20.520 you to take it down.
00:02:21.500 I would.
00:02:22.840 But you see, this is the problem I have with this logic because it's like, do you have
00:02:27.260 to wait for someone to tell you they don't like something for you to know that something's
00:02:31.000 inappropriate within the bounds of a relationship?
00:02:33.760 Sometimes, yeah.
00:02:34.520 Because...
00:02:35.260 Yeah, sometimes.
00:02:36.120 We have to...
00:02:36.960 But shouldn't there be...
00:02:37.800 Shouldn't there be...
00:02:39.480 And this is why we say...
00:02:40.180 Not when she's a wife, right? 1.00
00:02:41.040 Because early in the relationships, women will intentionally test the man's boundaries to see if there's 1.00
00:02:44.660 the boundaries setter anyways.
00:02:45.740 But we're talking about a husband and a wife.
00:02:48.120 If you've gotten to that stage, shouldn't you already know certain basic boundaries that
00:02:54.100 you shouldn't cross?
00:02:55.120 And this is the question.
00:02:55.840 She says she's posting it for herself. 1.00
00:02:57.220 Women need to stop saying that crap. 1.00
00:02:58.700 You're not posting nothing for yourself because if it was for yourself, you wouldn't post it. 1.00
00:03:04.340 You can't stay in your phone.
00:03:05.660 You post it because you think you personally look good and you genuinely do want to share
00:03:09.180 it to the world.
00:03:09.680 So you're not posting it for yourself.
00:03:10.380 You're posting it for the world.
00:03:11.240 Wait, wait, wait.
00:03:11.900 I have a question.
00:03:12.360 Why can't you just look good for your husband? 1.00
00:03:15.480 Why do you need to look good for everyone else?
00:03:18.480 I'm not a wife. 0.57
00:03:21.960 We're making you one.
00:03:23.020 It is validation.
00:03:27.060 It is validation.
00:03:27.720 You are not.
00:03:27.860 I understand it's marketing, right?
00:03:29.800 Oh, 100%.
00:03:30.500 I literally show skin, build views, and then I drop a track, and then I've got loads of views.
00:03:38.500 That's what I do.
00:03:39.260 Wonderful.
00:03:39.760 I love that.
00:03:40.340 I love what you just said because you literally, a couple of minutes ago, said that men sexualize
00:03:45.040 women, but you are sexualizing yourself to sell records. 1.00
00:03:47.600 Because I know men will buy into that.
00:03:50.320 Exactly.
00:03:51.100 So women know that. 1.00
00:03:52.540 So women sexualize themselves. 1.00
00:03:53.820 Women do that because of men. 1.00
00:03:55.880 No, women sexualize themselves. 1.00
00:03:57.840 You're not forcing us to do things.
00:03:59.640 We choose to do things.
00:04:00.060 I'll tell you why that is wrong.
00:04:01.620 Because I know that I can make money by going to the bank to rob the bank.
00:04:05.460 But that doesn't mean I'm going to do it.
00:04:06.880 Yeah, but that's hell of a legal.
00:04:08.280 Like, let's...
00:04:08.980 No, legal or not.
00:04:10.900 What you're doing isn't legal in countries either.
00:04:13.180 Apart from legal or not, before legality comes in, if I go to the bank, if I go to someone's
00:04:17.420 house, before the police or legality comes in, the person is obliged to defend themselves.
00:04:21.960 So before legality comes in, I know that if I go to another man's house to try to rob
00:04:25.480 him, he's probably going to kill me.
00:04:27.340 So that puts me in line. 0.99
00:04:29.540 Women know that they can sexualize themselves and get things from that. 1.00
00:04:34.760 But does it mean they should do it?
00:04:36.380 That's the question.
00:04:37.600 No, it's a choice.
00:04:39.360 We have choice.
00:04:40.220 So you can't blame men and say men sexualize women when women readily treat themselves first. 0.93
00:04:44.200 It's not a blame.
00:04:46.440 Listen, this is gaslighting.
00:04:48.200 Let me manipulate...
00:04:49.960 Actually, I have a question.
00:04:50.780 This is gaslighting.
00:04:51.300 Why on earth?
00:04:53.420 You never give sympathy to drug dealers when they sell drugs because they can. 0.85
00:04:58.180 But yet when women choose to do sex work or OnlyFans or sexualize themselves for money, 1.00
00:05:03.800 we want to give sympathy to the women somehow.
00:05:06.080 There's always going to be buyers.
00:05:07.440 There's always going to be dealers.
00:05:08.720 You manipulate men into doing the thing that you know they're going to do if you manipulate
00:05:12.020 them and then you blame them for being manipulated.
00:05:14.100 Yeah, basically.
00:05:15.120 That's gaslighting.
00:05:16.460 Thanks for that.
00:05:17.260 So the next woman... 1.00
00:05:18.300 I don't write the rules.
00:05:20.360 So the next woman we have here, this one is going to be, I think, I think it's going 1.00
00:05:25.460 to be 50-50.
00:05:26.720 I said inappropriate for a wife and a mother, but maybe you'll disagree.
00:05:32.200 Let's pull up the next one.
00:05:34.400 Thank you.
00:05:35.140 Now, there's pros and cons of this, right?
00:05:39.480 She does have the kid there. 0.99
00:05:40.920 So she is showing I do have a child.
00:05:43.740 But I almost think that makes it worse.
00:05:47.100 You're doing a thirst trap with your kid?
00:05:49.660 No.
00:05:49.820 This isn't sexual.
00:05:50.760 She's on a holiday.
00:05:51.740 There's no thirst trap there.
00:05:53.160 It's on a holiday.
00:05:53.900 Where has that been to be sexy?
00:05:56.400 I think the sexiness is when you're wearing underwear on the internet.
00:06:02.380 I think it's inappropriate for a wife and a mother. 0.95
00:06:05.180 Yeah.
00:06:06.320 Raise your hand.
00:06:07.540 I know this is going to be a controversial one.
00:06:09.360 If you agree with me.
00:06:11.700 Wait.
00:06:12.120 You've got to say that.
00:06:12.620 If it's lingerie.
00:06:14.120 No, if it's inappropriate.
00:06:15.060 This picture, I think, is inappropriate for a wife and a mother. 0.61
00:06:18.240 I would say inappropriate.
00:06:19.640 What?
00:06:20.320 Okay.
00:06:20.820 Now I'm in the minority.
00:06:21.920 So I want to hear.
00:06:22.760 It's swimwear.
00:06:23.360 Okay.
00:06:23.740 What other options are there?
00:06:24.620 Wait, hold on, hold on.
00:06:25.460 What other options are there?
00:06:26.540 What is she supposed to wear?
00:06:27.540 Is she supposed to wear something that's completely covered up? 1.00
00:06:30.600 Because I've not seen that.
00:06:31.900 A one-piece?
00:06:33.080 I've not seen that in ages.
00:06:34.440 It's not fashion.
00:06:35.560 It's not fashion.
00:06:36.280 No.
00:06:36.480 Stop it. 0.98
00:06:38.280 That is so silly. 0.86
00:06:39.700 When I look at that picture, I'm not sexualizing that picture at all. 0.97
00:06:42.600 Imagine.
00:06:43.440 A one-piece.
00:06:44.900 A one-piece.
00:06:45.360 I like that show.
00:06:46.580 It's a good show.
00:06:47.800 So she needs to cover her belly. 1.00
00:06:49.100 So she needs to cover her belly. 1.00
00:06:50.460 Why does she need to cover her stomach? 1.00
00:06:51.800 Wait, wait, wait.
00:06:52.100 Wait, wait, okay.
00:06:52.680 Why are we laughing at the thought of a one-piece?
00:06:55.560 I like that show.
00:06:56.140 Because that is...
00:06:57.100 A one-piece?
00:06:57.580 What's the difference?
00:06:58.340 What's the difference?
00:06:58.880 I don't even know what one-piece is. 0.91
00:06:59.700 Why are you trying to make your woman look ugly on the ground? 1.00
00:07:02.220 I wasn't trying to make her look ugly, but I do think you have a duty to your family to dress modest.
00:07:08.740 So she's got to wear a one-piece? 1.00
00:07:10.520 But a one-piece is only going to cover her belly. 1.00
00:07:12.480 Exactly.
00:07:12.960 It's not going to do much else.
00:07:14.620 Well, you said, what else could she wear?
00:07:16.980 Because now you guys were all acting like there was nothing else she could wear.
00:07:20.780 Oh, and you gave an option.
00:07:22.160 Okay, fair enough.
00:07:22.900 She could have worn a larger pair.
00:07:24.700 And you guys were all acting like, no, this was what she...
00:07:27.580 She could have a song.
00:07:28.480 She had a gun to her head and had to... 0.63
00:07:30.740 And then question number two is, why do you have to post it?
00:07:35.260 That's the question.
00:07:35.960 Because the reality is, it's so funny how we're all focusing on what she's actually wearing.
00:07:40.860 Other than, no one says she can't wear that.
00:07:43.740 But why is she posting the picture of her wearing that?
00:07:46.040 Is there a pool next to her?
00:07:47.800 Because the perception is a funny thing.
00:07:49.380 Perception is a funny thing.
00:07:50.440 There could be a pool next to it.
00:07:51.860 She could be going swimming.
00:07:53.080 No, my point is that she's on holiday.
00:07:55.580 How do we know?
00:07:56.140 Does she have to post... 0.99
00:07:56.820 No, even if she's on holiday, does she have to post the pictures of her on holiday where
00:08:00.680 she's wearing it?
00:08:01.320 But it could be a pool.
00:08:03.140 Can I state a difference?
00:08:05.220 Because she can wear it wherever she is, because obviously she has to wear a swimsuit to go 1.00
00:08:09.600 in the pool, obviously.
00:08:10.680 But why is that the picture she chooses to put in all the pictures she took on her holiday?
00:08:14.440 Why is it that one where she's naked that she chooses to put on the internet? 0.98
00:08:18.300 That's a validation.
00:08:18.940 And actually, even further, the reason I saw this picture was, I pointed out some girl,
00:08:24.660 because I've been doing this fun thing on Twitter where I judge appropriate or inappropriate.
00:08:28.580 They should thank me, really.
00:08:30.560 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:08:32.500 What is the police?
00:08:33.380 Yeah, everyone gets mad.
00:08:34.700 I'm like, you don't have to listen to my opinion.
00:08:36.300 It's just my opinion.
00:08:38.020 Anyway, so this woman decides to, I said, inappropriate to one chick. 1.00
00:08:42.660 She starts tweeting at me her selfie to show me.
00:08:45.420 I'm like, and I'm going to say inappropriate.
00:08:47.340 Yeah.
00:08:48.600 There's a much bigger problem with what she's posting as well.
00:08:51.320 And this is one of the reasons why many women are choosing not to have children, is they 1.00
00:08:55.140 believe that after they have children, they're expected to have these gorgeous bodies. 0.98
00:08:58.880 They're expected to look like 20-year-olds.
00:09:00.660 And when people post things like this, they're giving people the impression, well, I can't
00:09:04.740 do that after I give birth.
00:09:05.940 I can't, you know, my body's not going to look like that.
00:09:08.960 I'm not going to have kids.
00:09:10.020 They get terrified of it.
00:09:11.080 And there needs to be a frame shift in how motherhood is done. 1.00
00:09:14.640 And after you give birth, after you have kids, you're not expected to look like a 20-year-old
00:09:18.920 anymore.
00:09:19.640 So the most damaging responsibility.
00:09:20.300 She's trying to look like a 20-year-old at all. 0.97
00:09:22.040 I think she was, she's genuinely built that way.
00:09:23.820 Well, she's trying.
00:09:24.720 She's trying.
00:09:25.460 She's trying.
00:09:26.620 Wouldn't you be inspired if you saw a woman that's had a kid and she looks great?
00:09:30.180 Wouldn't you be inspired to want to look like that?
00:09:32.060 No, no.
00:09:32.300 That's my only, I only wonder, sometimes I wonder, because when I, some guys I follow
00:09:36.700 them, they look, they have great bodies and I get inspired by that, you know, and they've
00:09:40.240 gone through a lot of things.
00:09:41.140 So a mother, she's had a baby and then she looks great.
00:09:43.780 She's not just thin, right?
00:09:44.640 Like I've had, I've had three kids, all right?
00:09:46.520 I'm not, I'm not huge, right?
00:09:47.900 But I'm not sexualizing myself and that's what she's doing.
00:09:51.240 She's posing, wearing a bikini.
00:09:52.980 She has her breasts out. 1.00
00:09:54.500 It is a sexualized image of herself.
00:09:57.160 It's the pose.
00:09:57.820 It's the pose.
00:09:59.200 If a guy was standing there with his kid.
00:10:03.340 I have loads of pictures with my mom and aunties where they're in obviously bikinis at the 0.99
00:10:07.980 beach, but it's in a photo album and it's not online.
00:10:11.580 That's a different generation. 0.85
00:10:13.860 It's a different generation. 0.81
00:10:14.980 What I'm trying to say is that we're trying to basically bring the old school ways of
00:10:18.100 how modesty used to be into a new age and a new way.
00:10:20.400 I think this woman is from the same generation though.
00:10:22.520 Yeah, of course.
00:10:23.600 So your point doesn't stand.
00:10:24.780 Wait, I haven't finished.
00:10:26.340 Oh, oh, oh.
00:10:27.000 Okay.
00:10:28.200 Sorry.
00:10:28.820 I just, I just personally feel like.
00:10:31.920 What does the guy in the green suit think?
00:10:34.500 Sorry.
00:10:35.180 I just personally feel like we live in 2023.
00:10:37.420 This is made to seem normal to just take a picture of yourself and post it online, get
00:10:41.860 loads of likes.
00:10:42.560 It's nothing at all.
00:10:43.480 I mean, no cause, no reaction.
00:10:46.060 That's just how people live these days.
00:10:47.820 One thing I've noticed throughout this conversation, it's almost like we're not realizing that everyone
00:10:51.460 in here is also a little bit vain.
00:10:53.580 Naturally.
00:10:54.460 Yes.
00:10:54.680 We all have well-closed today looking at ourselves.
00:10:57.560 Do I look nice?
00:10:58.520 Do I not?
00:10:58.900 Yes.
00:10:59.380 It's just a natural thing that no matter what we do, it's going to still be here.
00:11:03.520 So when we post up, we're trying to say to our followers, oh, look, look at me.
00:11:08.320 Oh, I look good today.
00:11:09.700 But really, if you're smart or if you feel like you want to be modest in a certain way,
00:11:14.440 you can put your page on private.
00:11:16.580 You can also have certain people that follow you, not the predators or people that you think
00:11:20.700 that might be a little bit like looking at you in a certain way.
00:11:22.740 You can try and police it.
00:11:24.400 Private stories as well, yeah.
00:11:25.600 There we go.
00:11:26.060 There's still a screenshot and you still get out there.
00:11:27.860 You can't trust nothing.
00:11:29.260 She could be brave.
00:11:30.400 But hear me out.
00:11:31.300 Hear me out.
00:11:31.680 Or you could just take the picture.
00:11:34.080 Hear me out.
00:11:35.160 Hear me out.
00:11:35.720 Hear me out.
00:11:36.260 Hear me out.
00:11:36.840 And you could send it to your husband.
00:11:39.780 That's one.
00:11:40.120 That's one option.
00:11:41.520 He'll say, that's amazing, honey.
00:11:43.320 One option.
00:11:43.880 Send it to the group chat with your friends.
00:11:45.660 Yeah, like you got, you could text whoever you want.
00:11:48.300 Like how many people got to see it?
00:11:50.680 I take acceptance of this.
00:11:52.220 I'm incredibly vain.
00:11:53.920 What?
00:11:54.360 I'm not a little vain.
00:11:56.420 Thank you for saying.
00:11:57.460 I think you shouldn't speak on my behalf.
00:12:02.380 Okay, the next woman, go next, please. 1.00
00:12:05.420 I just think this is.
00:12:06.040 Oh, Jesus.
00:12:07.080 All right.
00:12:11.380 I want the Mariah Carey one after this one. 0.70
00:12:14.600 Because I got a lot of heat for that one.
00:12:17.520 So this one, I said inappropriate.
00:12:21.000 Inappropriate.
00:12:22.480 Inappropriate for a wife. 1.00
00:12:23.580 What is going on with these girls? 1.00
00:12:25.300 Can I look like man?
00:12:27.100 Oh, my God.
00:12:28.280 Did you just say that?
00:12:29.580 Is there a reason why they all put it down?
00:12:31.100 Like, they're just falling in a hench, bro?
00:12:33.300 I was bigger than the oldest in the background.
00:12:35.780 All right.
00:12:36.200 We're going to try to get through these.
00:12:37.660 So raise your hand.
00:12:39.380 Inappropriate.
00:12:39.840 Raise your hand if you think it's inappropriate.
00:12:41.400 Is she a mother and a wife? 0.98
00:12:43.400 Because of the second picture.
00:12:44.640 Because she's trying to show up. 0.84
00:12:45.440 As a mother and a wife.
00:12:47.960 Inappropriate.
00:12:48.460 Most say.
00:12:48.980 Okay.
00:12:49.280 Go to the next one, please.
00:12:50.660 Okay.
00:12:50.780 Go to the next one, please.