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JustPearlyThings
- July 21, 2023
Masculinity Coach Said This About PR0N
Episode Stats
Length
9 minutes
Words per Minute
224.22655
Word Count
2,196
Sentence Count
178
Misogynist Sentences
10
Hate Speech Sentences
6
Summary
Summaries are generated with
gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ
.
Transcript
Transcript is generated with
Whisper
(
turbo
).
Misogyny classification is done with
MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny
.
Hate speech classification is done with
facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target
.
00:00:00.000
Money makes a guy more confident and more, like, he's worthy for...
00:00:05.300
I get the other side of the coin, though.
00:00:06.340
I get a lot of, like, millionaire clients.
00:00:07.800
I was telling you before the show, a billionaire client.
00:00:10.640
And they're just trying to lead with that.
00:00:12.720
So they're like, I'm just going to pick her up in the Ferrari.
00:00:15.020
I think show the house.
00:00:16.460
A guy being in touch with his masculinity is what makes him attractive.
00:00:19.880
And he doesn't need money for that.
00:00:20.960
I agree.
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Yeah, he doesn't need money for that.
00:00:24.400
But the question was, money or looks?
00:00:26.640
Yeah.
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We need to go deeper into it.
00:00:28.840
Exactly.
00:00:29.060
But one thing also, when, first of all, money can just tell you more about his ambition.
00:00:35.680
That's what I was saying.
00:00:36.320
Yeah, it's up to something.
00:00:38.380
Fitness is more important than money, for sure.
00:00:40.600
Because your body, your health will give you everything.
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Mental health.
00:00:44.740
You can have your money today, you lose it tomorrow.
00:00:46.940
And you will be left alone with the girl that you picked.
00:00:50.020
And you'll be with the man that you picked.
00:00:52.200
And it's a duty to work a life together.
00:00:54.800
That's a commitment to a relationship.
00:00:56.120
Would you guys agree that if your guy was unemployed,
00:00:58.460
he only has so much time before you would leave?
00:01:02.120
Yes or no?
00:01:02.900
No.
00:01:03.220
Depends on the context.
00:01:03.960
It depends on what he's doing in that unemployment.
00:01:04.960
Let's say five years, no job.
00:01:06.340
Oh, that's a bit crazy.
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No.
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Like, no job at all.
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No.
00:01:09.180
I need, I believe that the man is the lead.
00:01:15.680
Like, he is the one that takes charge.
00:01:17.620
And if he doesn't hold that up, I just feel like, I couldn't stay with someone.
00:01:23.340
There needs to be a drive.
00:01:24.660
When you're working, there's a drive.
00:01:26.140
There's a motivation.
00:01:27.240
Like, you're working.
00:01:28.180
I'm working.
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Like, we're in this together.
00:01:30.560
Like, I couldn't be with a man that's just, that's no motivation.
00:01:33.320
For me, that's just being lazy.
00:01:34.620
If I'm being honest.
00:01:35.600
I think it depends, you know, because it depends if he's willing to work,
00:01:39.540
if he's motivated to work.
00:01:40.620
Whereas if he's not motivated and he's fine, he's just chilling with no job,
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no money for five years, then it's a bit of a problem.
00:01:45.760
But if he's motivated, he knows what he wants to do,
00:01:48.080
he's just working towards his goals or he's willing to work towards his goals,
00:01:51.420
then I feel like, that's okay.
00:01:53.380
Like, we've all taken time out for ourselves.
00:01:55.300
Five years.
00:01:56.600
You don't know what he, he might want to be a doctor out here.
00:01:58.500
You don't know what he wants to do, baby.
00:02:00.120
You don't know what he wants to do.
00:02:01.200
But like, obviously, everyone's different and we're all quite young as well.
00:02:04.860
Like, no, no, five years is a stretch.
00:02:06.620
I don't believe that.
00:02:07.160
Everyone has their own opinion.
00:02:08.380
Like, a side hustle.
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A hard time job.
00:02:11.580
No job.
00:02:11.720
Would you say, would you say a side hustle, Pearl, is a job?
00:02:16.420
Would you class it as the same thing?
00:02:17.800
A side hustle and a job?
00:02:18.580
So, for example, like, OnlyFans.
00:02:24.100
I mean, it's a job.
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It's still a job.
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For a man.
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For a guy.
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I think it's a job.
00:02:31.840
It's not a career.
00:02:32.820
Okay, yeah, yeah.
00:02:33.520
But it depends on the side hustle.
00:02:35.020
Yeah, yeah.
00:02:35.640
It's a broad, you know.
00:02:36.920
Yeah, it's a very broad.
00:02:37.760
Yeah.
00:02:38.540
This is an extreme example too, right?
00:02:40.140
Like, there's like gradients.
00:02:41.480
Are you talking about like, does a guy need to be rich versus like, have just enough?
00:02:45.960
You're talking about like, unemployed, right?
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My only point was at some point, if he's not making enough money, we're going to leave.
00:02:51.860
Yeah.
00:02:51.980
At some point, right?
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Yeah.
00:02:53.700
No, I would agree with that.
00:02:54.560
But I'm saying like, if the guy has like, his basic needs met.
00:02:57.480
Yeah.
00:02:57.780
Like, I've found it doesn't really make much of a difference if he has like, a ton of money.
00:03:01.280
Except for certain girls.
00:03:02.560
Not in the real world.
00:03:03.220
I thought you meant like, jobless.
00:03:04.720
What's the difference?
00:03:05.800
Okay, is it different in the Eastern European countries versus the West?
00:03:09.840
Yes.
00:03:10.300
I mean, in terms of with money.
00:03:12.040
Yeah.
00:03:12.420
I mean, yeah, because most people are poor, right?
00:03:13.800
Like, like in, in Ukraine and Poland, even in Brazil, like people are making like a thousand
00:03:18.700
dollars a month or less.
00:03:20.260
So like, you know, it's like 10 grand a year or less than 10 grand a year after taxes.
00:03:24.680
So, I mean, you know, it goes back to those as basic needs met, right?
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That basic needs are met.
00:03:31.140
I haven't found that it makes much of a difference because I've had so many rich clients that
00:03:34.160
are all clueless.
00:03:34.820
Like they're all in their, they're like millionaire circles and like, Hey, we thought this would
00:03:38.320
get us the girls and we got all the money and there's no girls.
00:03:41.100
And then I have clients that have hardly any money that just crush once they're doing things
00:03:45.760
right.
00:03:45.960
And the girl doesn't even know they don't have money.
00:03:47.860
But again, like we're talking about like unemployed, like completely broke for years versus at least
00:03:53.640
having basic needs met.
00:03:54.520
Like a lot of guys, like even if they're not doing super well, what's the statistic?
00:03:57.780
It's like 80% of people are living paycheck to paycheck in the U S I think is something
00:04:01.740
like that.
00:04:02.780
So that high.
00:04:03.400
Oh, wow.
00:04:03.780
I'm pretty sure.
00:04:04.420
Yeah.
00:04:04.680
So it's like if, if they don't get paid one week, they can't pay the bills, but that's
00:04:07.960
like almost all guys.
00:04:09.600
Right.
00:04:09.960
So all this like focus on, Oh, you need to go make a lot of money.
00:04:13.720
And there's a lot of creators that say like, forget dating, just go focus on making money
00:04:17.560
when they arrive at the money.
00:04:19.820
If they ever do, most of them don't even get the money, but if they do, it's not like
00:04:23.400
girls just start raining down in their lap.
00:04:25.460
Right.
00:04:26.020
Do you guys think that sex is a need that men can't live without?
00:04:30.540
Um, definitely.
00:04:31.940
I think men use something.
00:04:32.860
I think, yeah, sex is a need that men can't live without.
00:04:37.800
It depends on what you mean though.
00:04:39.220
Like what's the time period?
00:04:41.080
I mean, no, men clearly live without sex and they're just living on corn.
00:04:45.340
I think if you said, what do you think would happen if there wasn't corn?
00:04:48.540
I think, I think society would be very violent, wouldn't it?
00:04:52.380
I think if you get a lot of men, he's in the animal kingdom, isn't it?
00:04:55.840
It's the same sort of thing, isn't it?
00:04:56.960
You get, you know, one alpha male that's got all the females and the others are always fighting
00:05:00.900
in for position, willing to fight to the death.
00:05:02.960
I think you'd get quite a violent society and that's one of the reasons why monogamy came
00:05:06.700
about what's to stop that because if you have men that are not having sex and they're not getting
00:05:10.580
that frustration, I guess, out, they're going to take it out on society.
00:05:13.420
I think if you took away corn away from men, I think men's mental health would suffer tremendously,
00:05:18.840
probably more so than women.
00:05:19.960
So is corn a net positive or a net negative?
00:05:23.540
It depends on how you see it.
00:05:25.280
I think it can be a negative because it creates, it creates like a false, like a fantasy.
00:05:32.260
And so when, you know, you do go out with guys, they might be like, they might be more
00:05:37.520
forward with sex or certain things because they've seen certain things, they might have
00:05:42.800
that expectation.
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So I feel like sometimes it can be quite pressuring and it can, I think sometimes as well that
00:05:50.560
corn is sometimes like devaluing women.
00:05:56.540
I don't know, like it's kind of, it doesn't, it doesn't make sex feel special.
00:06:01.360
Yeah.
00:06:02.280
I don't think it makes it more, like you were saying earlier, like the intimacy just creates
00:06:06.260
a fantasy.
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See, sometimes I could see where corn is a net negative for guys in an individual level,
00:06:14.380
but I'm just going to play devil's advocate here.
00:06:18.880
I also think it's helped a lot of guys stay faithful in sexless marriages.
00:06:23.040
I was going to say that.
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I was going to say that.
00:06:25.180
Yeah, 100%.
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It's so true.
00:06:27.300
I think there's a place for it because imagine you're one of these guys and your wife has
00:06:30.980
had a kid or two kids or whatever.
00:06:32.180
She's just dealing with life.
00:06:33.600
And I personally am a believer in marriage.
00:06:35.400
I mean, we're getting married soon, right?
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I believe in marriage, right?
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I believe if that can keep you going through that period, it's better to engage in that
00:06:44.420
than to actually cheat.
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Cheat, yeah.
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And you're going to risk a hell of a lot.
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And I think corn from that point of view is good.
00:06:49.720
But I think too much of it, like anything, is the issue.
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There's also an issue where guys don't want to go out and do anything because they're so
00:06:56.140
addicted to corn.
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Yeah, they're addicted to it.
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It stops them being about their purpose.
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They've got these unrealistic views of women.
00:07:01.580
And for some men, especially men that are more prone to that, it might make them even
00:07:06.060
more violent because they go out and demand it of women.
00:07:09.020
And some men do it by force.
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I mean, most sexual assault is men, are the perpetrators of it.
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And I think how much is corn to blame for that?
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And I think it's tapping into some ancient biological process of men.
00:07:19.260
But you think corn increases sexual assault?
00:07:21.380
I don't see why it would not because if men are frustrated at home and all they know is
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just being online, at some point you might want the real thing.
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Really?
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I would think it would do.
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I don't know.
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But I would think it would do the opposite because it gives them a release instead of
00:07:36.020
going out.
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But you've seen some issues where men have actually assaulted women where they've had this
00:07:40.700
addiction and they want to play out in real life.
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You see that often, you know, it's a fantasy and they want to play it in real life and
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they go by the point of...
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I haven't seen one.
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Was there something in the news or...
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I've never seen that.
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Wasn't that a policeman that actually got done for that, addicted to that?
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The one that Sarah Edvard...
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I also had that.
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I think, yeah, he had a porn addiction, did he not?
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The one that actually dragged the woman off the streets in Clapham.
00:08:03.560
I think he had an addiction with porn, if I'm not right.
00:08:05.480
I mean, don't quote...
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Corn.
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Corn, please, please.
00:08:07.460
Sorry, with corn because, you know, and it's natural, isn't it?
00:08:11.880
If that's all you know is the virtual version of something, at some point it's quite easy
00:08:15.980
to spill over into wanting a real version of it.
00:08:18.000
Do you think it's the same thing with video games?
00:08:19.800
Like, men that play video games are going to be more violent?
00:08:22.740
Because I'm pretty sure the evidence was the opposite with that.
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I definitely don't play video games.
00:08:26.940
I agree with, I think that is true as well because, for example, I don't know about, not really
00:08:33.080
in the UK, but I heard about a lot of school shootings with, like, young people in America,
00:08:39.320
like, it's always to do with guns and always to do with, yeah, like, those kind of, like,
00:08:43.940
video games.
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So I think that definitely has an impact as well.
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But then that's, like, everything has an impact with social media and with technology
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because even what we see online might change the way that we move or we look.
00:08:57.720
So everything does, I think.
00:08:59.660
But I think it's only going to amplify what's already there.
00:09:02.180
What's already there, yeah.
00:09:03.820
So if you're someone that's that way inclined, then, yeah, it might amplify.
00:09:06.260
But I think for most people, playing video games is a way to safely indulge in your fantasies.
00:09:11.080
In the same way, corn would be.
00:09:12.200
Yeah, exactly.
00:09:13.120
With corn, like, you know, like that statistic you cited, it's almost one in three guys.
00:09:17.080
So it's getting, like, really high.
00:09:18.200
And I think it's, like, still upward trending, right?
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So who knows where that's going to end.
00:09:22.160
But when a guy can just, you know, again, safely, like, go watch corn and deal with that desire
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and not have to put himself out there and not get his ego bruised or not face, you know,
00:09:31.340
potential legal consequences or anything like that.
00:09:33.540
Plus, most guys have no idea what to do anyways, right?
00:09:36.680
And what I've noticed with so many of my clients is guys genuinely will put in time and effort,
00:09:41.020
in some cases money with a lot of these companies that are supposed to help them,
00:09:45.160
and they still fail.
00:09:46.180
And then they're like, well, what now?
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