JustPearlyThings - August 16, 2023


Modern Men SUFFER This Grim Reality


Episode Stats


Length

6 minutes

Words per minute

219.56868

Word count

1,517

Sentence count

150

Harmful content

Misogyny

14

sentences flagged

Toxicity

16

sentences flagged

Hate speech

10

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, we have a special guest on the show, David, who is a married man who has been with his wife for 8 years and has never been a VIRgins before. We talk about what it's like being a Virgins in the dating world, how to be a virgins in marriage, and how to find a good one.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 And we used to take L's and move on. 0.91
00:00:02.800 Like, you didn't go around.
00:00:04.380 Like, you used to just take your L, and you wouldn't want to tell everyone about it,
00:00:08.440 because it's a little embarrassing.
00:00:09.600 You just go home and eat ice cream and cry about it, watch a sad movie, and then move on.
00:00:13.140 Yeah, but now it's like we've got to tell everyone and start a cork.
00:00:17.780 Like, just take your L.
00:00:19.700 David, so you've been married the whole time, since day one,
00:00:23.420 when you first were with a woman, married the whole time.
00:00:25.960 So you haven't been exposed to the dating scene or outside?
00:00:28.440 Y'all are freaking wild.
00:00:30.000 I'm just going to say that right now. 0.87
00:00:31.100 Like, I look at this stuff from the outside.
00:00:33.420 So crazy story, awesome virginity to my wife. 1.00
00:00:37.060 We've been together since 2014.
00:00:39.820 We started dating July of 2014, proposed to her in January of 2015,
00:00:43.780 got married in August 2015, and we're about to come on eight years of marriage.
00:00:47.580 One woman my entire life.
00:00:49.780 How did you meet?
00:00:50.740 How did you meet?
00:00:51.280 At school or college?
00:00:52.480 So my mom actually introduced me to her.
00:00:54.420 They had a mutual friend at her birthday party.
00:00:56.460 So no, it wasn't even arranged.
00:00:57.260 I'm just playing.
00:00:57.640 It was more so, there was a mutual friend, and she was a gossiper.
00:01:01.800 And so that friend watched her grow up.
00:01:05.740 And so when they all met, my mom told me about her.
00:01:07.680 I was dating some girl at the time she didn't like.
00:01:09.980 And she showed me one picture of her.
00:01:11.540 If you ever look her up on Instagram, gorgeous.
00:01:13.520 It's just at Yana Fishchuck.
00:01:14.640 And she had these striped pants on. 0.98
00:01:16.780 And I was like, yo, those legs don't end.
00:01:19.060 And so I had followed her.
00:01:20.560 I was dating this girl.
00:01:21.340 I was in the process of breaking up with her.
00:01:23.420 And I asked this mutual friend about her.
00:01:26.980 And not one kind of thing, aside from just the fact that the parents were split,
00:01:30.540 and there was just some stuff going on there.
00:01:32.000 Now, was she in Monroe?
00:01:33.660 No, she was in Auburn, which is an hour away.
00:01:36.180 It's an hour away.
00:01:37.300 I know what that is.
00:01:37.760 There's a road trip every time we went to go date and see each other.
00:01:39.680 Yeah, in Seattle.
00:01:40.640 I mean, here you get there in 15 minutes.
00:01:42.140 There it takes you eight hours to drive.
00:01:43.400 Not literally, but it's traffic.
00:01:46.360 Right.
00:01:46.760 Forget it.
00:01:48.040 It's like going through London from one end to the other.
00:01:50.380 Yeah.
00:01:50.680 Right.
00:01:51.080 So.
00:01:51.480 Dude, I say like, I told my wife, I was like, there is no, like, we got into the relationship
00:01:55.600 knowing that we wanted to get married early and grow together.
00:01:58.420 Was she a virgin too?
00:01:59.740 Yeah.
00:02:00.300 Oh.
00:02:01.020 And I talk about rare.
00:02:01.900 That's why I'm like, yo, I never want to break up with her, lose her anything.
00:02:04.740 Because if I have to go back in the dating pool, I'm just going to stay single.
00:02:07.680 I'm done.
00:02:08.160 I'm done.
00:02:08.760 It's so much worse.
00:02:09.900 It's not even as fun as I, like, when I was.
00:02:13.140 Because you're what?
00:02:14.040 Mid-20s?
00:02:14.820 Yeah.
00:02:14.920 I'm 29.
00:02:15.760 Yeah.
00:02:16.220 Late 20s.
00:02:17.080 Mid to late 20s.
00:02:18.160 When I was in that phase, like, it was a little bit more fun and exciting.
00:02:23.780 Now it's just dreadful.
00:02:25.640 I mean, I'm terrified.
00:02:26.520 I'm like, yo, girl, you're bomb. 0.80
00:02:27.740 You go to a bedroom, you're like, yo, you got a little tally whacker down there, don't
00:02:30.700 you?
00:02:31.260 That terrifies me.
00:02:32.140 I'm like, you don't even know.
00:02:33.360 You don't even know.
00:02:34.240 So I'm like, I'm good.
00:02:34.940 Wait, wait, wait.
00:02:35.360 Did you say tally whacker?
00:02:36.300 What do you mean?
00:02:36.700 He's got the extra.
00:02:37.680 I've got Daniel Craig over here.
00:02:38.940 So it's like, you know.
00:02:39.740 You've got the extra equipment days.
00:02:41.300 Basically.
00:02:41.760 That's what I'm afraid of.
00:02:42.620 That's why I'm like, you come to Vegas and it's like, you don't know what you're going
00:02:45.280 to get.
00:02:46.920 Pearl, remember we were talking about on your podcast how there's no virgins out there or 0.97
00:02:51.620 it's hard to find a virgin or men don't want to.
00:02:54.020 What are your thoughts on men?
00:02:55.440 Should they have to be with a virgin to be successful in a marriage or what are your thoughts
00:03:00.020 on this?
00:03:00.400 Well, only nine, I think 96% of women aren't virgins on their wedding days. 0.99
00:03:05.840 96%.
00:03:06.600 Yeah, so good luck if you want one.
00:03:09.220 Like, they don't really exist.
00:03:10.380 It's so funny because it's like, all the women will come forward and like, you know, it's 0.99
00:03:14.940 like, we're all whores, all of us. 0.98
00:03:17.280 Because, yeah, no, 96% even. 0.99
00:03:19.640 No, no, seriously.
00:03:21.000 Because 96% of us will be thrown out 100 years ago.
00:03:25.180 Yeah.
00:03:25.580 96%.
00:03:25.980 I got a 1% wife. 1.00
00:03:27.020 I'm cool with it.
00:03:27.800 96%.
00:03:28.560 Y'all are like, oh, that's so cute.
00:03:30.480 How do we not know that part of that 96%, how do we not know that maybe they're not married, 0.74
00:03:36.740 like she's not a virgin on their wedding day, but maybe she only had sex with that guy and 0.94
00:03:40.740 they got married. 0.98
00:03:41.160 Double it.
00:03:42.340 90%.
00:03:43.100 Like, it's like, okay, okay, we'll give another, another five, but it's still nine out of
00:03:48.240 10 of us would be thrown out 100 years ago.
00:03:50.520 So, I mean, can men expect that in 2023?
00:03:53.680 I don't say this happily, you know, but not really.
00:03:56.660 Well, then when you have a social media life that is brought on to 20-something-year-old
00:04:05.140 women who are at the age of marriage and insecurities, they're going to veer themselves into a pond 1.00
00:04:15.540 that maybe they're not even into.
00:04:18.460 Like, all of these women who are going into selling their bodies for their money. 1.00
00:04:26.500 One out of 25 under the age of 35 sells their bodies.
00:04:29.820 Oh, I'm sure, I'm sure that it's even more than that.
00:04:32.380 I want to talk about that.
00:04:33.500 I want to talk about that.
00:04:34.080 I would think it's even more than that.
00:04:35.660 You're going to like this.
00:04:36.180 Well, yeah, that's just Cam and OnlyFans.
00:04:37.760 But my philosophy is men always pay for it. 0.70
00:04:40.620 Yep.
00:04:41.060 Yeah, and that's why when they're desperate.
00:04:43.020 So is one out of 25 selling or are all of them?
00:04:46.260 I think it's more than that.
00:04:48.240 I think it's one out of five.
00:04:49.240 Because if you're married, you're paying for it if you're married.
00:04:50.960 You have to have resources.
00:04:53.160 If you have a girlfriend, you have to have resources. 0.99
00:04:54.680 You just got a contracted hooker. 1.00
00:04:55.760 If you have a transactional relationship, you're paying for it. 0.76
00:04:59.360 So maybe one out of 25 has a transactional situation.
00:05:02.720 But I believe all men pay. 1.00
00:05:04.920 And the guys that don't, just like the guy says, I'd never pay for it.
00:05:07.820 Oh, she did it for free. 0.98
00:05:08.980 Well, I wouldn't want to be with a girl that's free because there's no value. 1.00
00:05:12.240 There's no value. 0.98
00:05:12.500 If she says, oh, come over and watch Netflix and we'll have sex, dude, that's easy. 0.99
00:05:16.760 Who wants to be with that? 1.00
00:05:18.080 So look at it from this perspective.
00:05:20.320 If for thousands of years, men or women always went for guys with the resources, right?
00:05:25.080 Yeah.
00:05:25.340 Dr. David Buss in his book, Evolution of Desire.
00:05:28.360 And if that's the case, we have to establish those resources.
00:05:31.540 That costs us money.
00:05:32.760 I think there's a distinction, though, between paying for it and just being a guy who's of,
00:05:38.900 you know, decent net worth.
00:05:41.080 And he can provide interesting experiences.
00:05:43.780 Like I've talked to the Tates about this.
00:05:44.900 There's no difference.
00:05:45.720 I talked to, no, there is.
00:05:46.640 I talked to Tristan about this and they have or had a lot of money, right?
00:05:51.480 And he would date women.
00:05:52.580 And he said, but it's not like, it's not like you say to the woman, right, come out and I'm
00:05:55.480 going to, you know, I'll give you five grand for the weekend.
00:05:57.300 No.
00:05:57.400 It's not that.
00:05:58.200 But it is, hey, I've got this cool car, we can take a trip, we can go down to Italy,
00:06:02.760 we'll be by the beach, we'll go to this cool restaurant, blah, blah, blah.
00:06:05.020 So they're providing, the money allows you to provide an interesting experience, but it's
00:06:10.660 not necessarily, but I agree, there are degrees of transactionality in all of this stuff.
00:06:14.700 But that, you don't have to be, you know, Tristan Tate-style multi-millionaire for that
00:06:18.100 to happen, though.
00:06:18.740 They're on a lower level.
00:06:20.380 There's a lot of girls who, they want to go on trips. 1.00
00:06:22.300 I think, I think the whole point is that, you know, just as women, we make kind of 0.99
00:06:27.340 dumb decisions. 0.86
00:06:28.300 So here, put that up again, please. 0.99
00:06:30.080 Put that up again, please.
00:06:37.240 You know, and that's what I was thinking about.
00:06:39.500 I'm like, you can't better, like, and I was thinking about, I was thinking about how
00:06:42.900 nowadays, like, under five is the new virgin, and I was thinking about how sad that is.
00:06:47.100 I'm like, as a group, I'm like, as a group, like, the best women in today's market, it's
00:06:52.720 like, under five men.
00:06:53.500 Well, the best women in... 0.88