Modern Says The Unthinkable
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
194.51315
Summary
In this episode we talk about how to deal with a man who makes less than you and how you would deal with it. Do you have a minimum you would like him to bring in a month? Do you want him to be a provider or do you just listen to whatever he says?
Transcript
00:00:06.660
Yeah, yeah, significantly less than I was earning more.
00:00:23.220
I'm not really materialistic about stuff like that.
00:00:37.460
Yeah, if he's unemployed for two years, I'm out.
00:00:48.120
How much you'd like him to bring him a week or a month?
00:01:00.600
Whatever the amount that sustains us to be happy.
00:01:04.520
But I don't need like big flashy things to be happy.
00:01:14.980
There's someone, there's like a couple people in these boxes over there.
00:01:26.440
I don't think I could, but money doesn't determine the person for me, if that makes sense.
00:01:43.440
For you, to have all your necessities met, what are we looking at?
00:01:51.780
Okay, so you know what it takes to sustain you.
00:01:57.440
Because if you do, you have to know your minimum, surely, surely.
00:02:02.540
Unless you don't mind providing for yourself, then it doesn't matter at all.
00:02:10.680
I thought you just said he's earning less than me.
00:02:13.200
Yeah, so I'm saying, at what point do you respect his decision making?
00:02:18.620
So like, if he said, quit your job tomorrow, I have a plan, I'll listen.
00:02:22.700
But if he's a bum and hasn't worked in two years, why the hell would you do that?
00:02:29.940
There's a minimum point where, and it doesn't have to be exact, you know, just a rough figure
00:02:48.620
Well, just go off like what it takes to sustain yourself.
00:02:54.700
If he's bringing in like, between £3,000 and £4,000?
00:03:12.620
Yeah, I would, but he would have to be able to pay the bills and whatnot.
00:03:19.620
I would say £4,000 because that's like enough to like pay bills, rent or mortgage, car note,
00:03:50.620
My minimum, I'll be comfortable with, let's say, £3,000 a month.
00:04:00.620
I don't know if it kind of relates to the question that you're asking.
00:04:38.620
I think my approach generally is a job is a job.
00:04:41.620
As long as it's making you comfortable, then I will respect that full stop.
00:04:47.620
But I mean, in terms of like respect, I mean, if we're living together and we have a family
00:04:51.620
and I meant to like respect all your decision making, if you're not earning at least to
00:04:58.620
If you're dating a guy that makes $250,000 a year pounds or whatever it is here.
00:05:12.620
But at some point, like it switches to where you give him more control.
00:05:16.620
Because if a bum tells you to do that, you're not going to do it.
00:05:20.620
If it hasn't worked in two years, he says quit.
00:05:27.620
But like, I'm just asking roughly around what point is it that you respect his decision
00:05:37.620
These are things that you wouldn't even ask yourself.
00:05:40.620
I'm actually kind of glad that I'm here and you're doing this.
00:05:42.620
I mean, if you want to get married, you kind of have to do the math.
00:05:45.620
Because it also depends how many kids you want.
00:05:50.620
You need to think about these things while entering a relationship, especially if you're going
00:06:04.620
And the man is just right there looking at the state.
00:06:17.620
And you think about their career ladder as well.
00:06:28.620
Because that's how they help men, like, blossom.
00:06:34.620
Because men are very, like, da, da, da, da, da.
00:06:37.620
And women are like, oh, but you could do it this way and this way.
00:06:43.620
Women have to, like, think outside the box because men are very, a matter of fact, which
00:06:54.620
That's, I think it says something like, behind every great man is an even better woman
00:07:04.620
That's the most bullshit quote I've ever heard.
00:07:05.620
I don't think it should be even better, but I think great women should be there instead.
00:07:16.620
You're telling me Elon Musk needed a woman to get to where he's at.
00:07:20.620
Rich men get to where they're going regardless of whether or not they have a girl there
00:07:26.620
It's like, I mean, like the guys that are going somewhere, they're going to go somewhere
00:07:30.620
It's just like women just like to take credit for doing nothing.
00:07:35.620
Listen, I think unless you're looking at having kids, men can just pretty much do anything.
00:07:44.620
Well, they do, but they don't need it as much as women.
00:07:58.620
We wiggle around a bit more, but it works together.
00:08:21.620
And that's why I'm sitting there laughing because I think normally it's Pearl and every woman is doing it.
00:08:38.620
One person made a comment and I'm just saying, listen to the choir.