JustPearlyThings - October 27, 2023


Modern Says The Unthinkable


Episode Stats


Length

8 minutes

Words per minute

194.51315

Word count

1,704

Sentence count

222

Harmful content

Misogyny

10

sentences flagged

Toxicity

6

sentences flagged

Hate speech

19

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode we talk about how to deal with a man who makes less than you and how you would deal with it. Do you have a minimum you would like him to bring in a month? Do you want him to be a provider or do you just listen to whatever he says?

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 I was making less than me.
00:00:06.660 Yeah, yeah, significantly less than I was earning more.
00:00:09.880 He would still be my man, probably.
00:00:11.760 It doesn't really matter to me.
00:00:13.200 I love the person for the person.
00:00:14.760 If it stopped me from doing things
00:00:17.560 and living the life that I wanted to live,
00:00:20.240 then I'm not with the right person.
00:00:21.880 If I love someone, I love them for them.
00:00:23.220 I'm not really materialistic about stuff like that.
00:00:25.340 Is there a minimum?
00:00:27.080 What, figure?
00:00:28.080 Yeah, I mean, cause,
00:00:30.000 let's be honest, let's be honest.
00:00:32.040 If he's unemployed for two years, you're out.
00:00:35.380 Yeah, probably.
00:00:36.380 And I hope you would be.
00:00:37.460 Yeah, if he's unemployed for two years, I'm out.
00:00:40.380 So there has to be like a minimum.
00:00:41.700 What would you roughly say it is?
00:00:44.000 I don't know what people earn.
00:00:46.120 And not shift work.
00:00:47.040 I couldn't tell you.
00:00:48.120 How much you'd like him to bring him a week or a month?
00:00:50.540 Not shift work.
00:00:51.700 What would you like him to bring him a month?
00:00:53.220 Yeah, in a month.
00:00:54.540 Two grand, three grand, four grand.
00:00:58.140 Remember, you listen if he says quit.
00:01:00.600 Whatever the amount that sustains us to be happy.
00:01:04.520 But I don't need like big flashy things to be happy.
00:01:06.980 Would you be happy living in the caravan?
00:01:08.980 I guess.
00:01:09.980 What about the box on the corner over here?
00:01:14.980 There's someone, there's like a couple people in these boxes over there.
00:01:18.980 Oh, you're down there, isn't it?
00:01:21.440 Yeah, literally.
00:01:22.440 There's a homeless shelter down the road.
00:01:24.440 They got this box out in the roads.
00:01:25.440 I've seen it.
00:01:26.440 I don't think I could, but money doesn't determine the person for me, if that makes sense.
00:01:33.440 I don't know if that answers your question.
00:01:35.440 No, it doesn't.
00:01:36.440 No, not really.
00:01:38.440 There's no minimum.
00:01:39.440 Like, come on.
00:01:40.440 No minimum.
00:01:41.440 I don't know.
00:01:42.440 I don't know what people earn.
00:01:43.440 For you, to have all your necessities met, what are we looking at?
00:01:49.780 Do you live on your own?
00:01:50.780 Yeah, I live on my own.
00:01:51.780 Okay, so you know what it takes to sustain you.
00:01:53.780 Yeah.
00:01:54.780 Do you want him to be a provider, basically?
00:01:57.440 Because if you do, you have to know your minimum, surely, surely.
00:02:02.540 Unless you don't mind providing for yourself, then it doesn't matter at all.
00:02:06.680 Yeah.
00:02:07.680 Can we not come together?
00:02:08.680 Was that not an option?
00:02:10.680 I thought you just said he's earning less than me.
00:02:13.200 Yeah, so I'm saying, at what point do you respect his decision making?
00:02:18.620 So like, if he said, quit your job tomorrow, I have a plan, I'll listen. 0.72
00:02:22.700 But if he's a bum and hasn't worked in two years, why the hell would you do that? 1.00
00:02:25.440 Yeah, I would definitely not listen. 0.86
00:02:27.440 So there's a minimum point, right?
00:02:28.940 Yeah.
00:02:29.940 There's a minimum point where, and it doesn't have to be exact, you know, just a rough figure
00:02:33.980 where you would listen to what he says.
00:02:35.980 Honestly, I couldn't tell you.
00:02:41.200 I couldn't tell you.
00:02:42.200 Yeah.
00:02:43.200 Okay.
00:02:44.200 What about £30,000?
00:02:45.200 Would you listen?
00:02:46.200 Is that the minimum people earn in the UK?
00:02:48.620 Well, just go off like what it takes to sustain yourself.
00:02:51.700 And then...
00:02:52.700 Could you live on £1,000 a month?
00:02:54.700 If he's bringing in like, between £3,000 and £4,000?
00:02:57.700 £3,000 and £4,000.
00:02:58.700 I think, yeah, that's fine.
00:02:59.620 A year?
00:03:00.620 No, a month.
00:03:01.620 A month.
00:03:02.620 Oh, yeah.
00:03:03.620 That's nice.
00:03:04.620 That's fine.
00:03:05.620 That's more than nice for some people.
00:03:06.620 Okay.
00:03:07.620 What about you?
00:03:08.620 Would you date a guy that makes less than you?
00:03:09.620 I would date a guy that...
00:03:12.620 Yeah, I would, but he would have to be able to pay the bills and whatnot.
00:03:18.620 What's your minimum?
00:03:19.620 I would say £4,000 because that's like enough to like pay bills, rent or mortgage, car note,
00:03:28.620 that sort of stuff.
00:03:29.620 Okay.
00:03:30.620 What about you?
00:03:31.620 I think I would respect him.
00:03:36.620 I don't believe you.
00:03:40.620 Why don't you believe me?
00:03:42.620 What's your minimum?
00:03:49.620 Okay.
00:03:50.620 My minimum, I'll be comfortable with, let's say, £3,000 a month.
00:03:55.620 I think that's fine to bring in.
00:03:58.620 I think it's all down to...
00:04:00.620 I don't know if it kind of relates to the question that you're asking.
00:04:02.620 I think it's just all down to ambition.
00:04:04.620 If he's a bum... 1.00
00:04:05.620 No, she said no.
00:04:06.620 No.
00:04:07.620 That's what he's going to earn.
00:04:08.620 This is the problem with women. 1.00
00:04:09.620 She said that's what he's going to earn.
00:04:10.620 You're reading into it.
00:04:11.620 He's going to be a high earner one day.
00:04:12.620 No, he's not.
00:04:13.620 This is the problem.
00:04:14.620 He's got potential.
00:04:15.620 Why would you go and call me this situation?
00:04:17.620 There is no potential here.
00:04:19.620 He goes to jobs.
00:04:20.620 He's happy at his job.
00:04:22.620 He loves it.
00:04:23.620 He loves it.
00:04:24.620 It doesn't mean he's lazy.
00:04:25.620 Maybe he's like a, I don't know. 0.51
00:04:26.620 Do police officers...
00:04:27.620 Postman?
00:04:28.620 Yeah, postman.
00:04:29.620 Do police officers make a lot here?
00:04:30.620 A manager at McDonald's and he loves his job.
00:04:31.620 He enjoys working at Tesco.
00:04:32.620 Yeah.
00:04:33.620 Yeah.
00:04:34.620 Oh God.
00:04:35.620 I mean, I worked at McDonald's.
00:04:36.620 It's all right.
00:04:37.620 I worked at Tesco.
00:04:38.620 I think my approach generally is a job is a job.
00:04:41.620 As long as it's making you comfortable, then I will respect that full stop.
00:04:44.620 Yeah.
00:04:45.620 I think that's just it.
00:04:46.620 Oh yeah.
00:04:47.620 But I mean, in terms of like respect, I mean, if we're living together and we have a family
00:04:51.620 and I meant to like respect all your decision making, if you're not earning at least to
00:04:56.620 cover what it takes.
00:04:57.620 I mean, it's like, okay.
00:04:58.620 If you're dating a guy that makes $250,000 a year pounds or whatever it is here.
00:05:04.620 Um, if he says quit, when?
00:05:07.620 I get it.
00:05:08.620 Yeah.
00:05:09.620 That makes so much money.
00:05:10.620 It's when, like, when do you want me to?
00:05:12.620 But at some point, like it switches to where you give him more control.
00:05:16.620 Because if a bum tells you to do that, you're not going to do it. 1.00
00:05:19.620 Yeah.
00:05:20.620 If it hasn't worked in two years, he says quit.
00:05:22.620 You're like, what?
00:05:23.620 I think we can all agree on that though.
00:05:25.620 Yeah.
00:05:26.620 Which we all agree on.
00:05:27.620 But like, I'm just asking roughly around what point is it that you respect his decision
00:05:31.620 making?
00:05:32.620 Yeah.
00:05:33.620 Four grand a month.
00:05:34.620 Like roughly four grand a month.
00:05:35.620 Okay.
00:05:36.620 Such a good question.
00:05:37.620 These are things that you wouldn't even ask yourself.
00:05:39.620 Oh, yes.
00:05:40.620 I'm actually kind of glad that I'm here and you're doing this.
00:05:42.620 I mean, if you want to get married, you kind of have to do the math.
00:05:44.620 Absolutely.
00:05:45.620 Because it also depends how many kids you want.
00:05:47.620 Yeah.
00:05:48.620 So like, how much does each kid cost?
00:05:49.620 Yeah.
00:05:50.620 You need to think about these things while entering a relationship, especially if you're going
00:05:53.620 to merge into one.
00:05:54.620 I feel like women do, don't they?
00:05:56.620 Yeah.
00:05:57.620 Like, I see a man.
00:05:58.620 Even on first dates.
00:05:59.620 Exactly.
00:06:00.620 Like, what would our wedding look like?
00:06:02.620 Yeah.
00:06:03.620 What area are we going to move to?
00:06:04.620 And the man is just right there looking at the state.
00:06:07.620 Yeah.
00:06:08.620 But we're five years into it.
00:06:09.620 She's like, oh, today's a nice day.
00:06:11.620 She's like, we could have two kids.
00:06:13.620 The dog.
00:06:15.620 The white picket fence is there.
00:06:17.620 And you think about their career ladder as well.
00:06:19.620 All of it.
00:06:20.620 Yeah.
00:06:21.620 100%.
00:06:22.620 And you look on Glassdoor.
00:06:23.620 I think women like to fantasize a lot. 1.00
00:06:25.620 Oh yeah.
00:06:26.620 And think way into the future.
00:06:27.620 That's good.
00:06:28.620 Because that's how they help men, like, blossom.
00:06:31.620 Like, that's how women are helpless to men. 1.00
00:06:33.620 Yeah.
00:06:34.620 Because men are very, like, da, da, da, da, da. 0.73
00:06:37.620 And women are like, oh, but you could do it this way and this way. 1.00
00:06:40.620 Yeah.
00:06:41.620 And they flower the seeds that make it grow.
00:06:43.620 Women have to, like, think outside the box because men are very, a matter of fact, which
00:06:48.620 is good.
00:06:49.620 And that's why the woman and the man.
00:06:51.620 Works together.
00:06:52.620 Yeah.
00:06:53.620 It's like that quote.
00:06:54.620 That's, I think it says something like, behind every great man is an even better woman
00:06:59.620 or something.
00:07:00.620 Have you heard that one?
00:07:01.620 Yeah, I don't agree with that one.
00:07:02.620 Oh, yeah, that.
00:07:03.620 I don't agree with that one. 1.00
00:07:04.620 That's the most bullshit quote I've ever heard. 0.99
00:07:05.620 I don't think it should be even better, but I think great women should be there instead. 1.00
00:07:09.620 It kind of.
00:07:10.620 Oh, just the woman that cares. 1.00
00:07:11.620 Yeah.
00:07:12.620 Yeah.
00:07:13.620 Just his woman. 0.98
00:07:14.620 Beyond every man is his woman. 1.00
00:07:15.620 Just his woman. 0.98
00:07:16.620 You're telling me Elon Musk needed a woman to get to where he's at.
00:07:20.620 Rich men get to where they're going regardless of whether or not they have a girl there
00:07:23.620 or not.
00:07:24.620 By doing dog eat dog.
00:07:25.620 For sure.
00:07:26.620 It's like, I mean, like the guys that are going somewhere, they're going to go somewhere
00:07:29.620 whether or not you're there.
00:07:30.620 It's just like women just like to take credit for doing nothing. 1.00
00:07:33.620 Yeah.
00:07:34.620 I guess.
00:07:35.620 Listen, I think unless you're looking at having kids, men can just pretty much do anything.
00:07:42.620 Whereas they don't need emotional support.
00:07:44.620 Well, they do, but they don't need it as much as women. 1.00
00:07:49.620 I don't think they need it.
00:07:50.620 Like women like to talk about stuff more. 1.00
00:07:52.620 They're with their friends.
00:07:53.620 What do they talk about?
00:07:54.620 They talk about guys.
00:07:55.620 Talk about feelings.
00:07:56.620 Talk about.
00:07:57.620 Men are just like straight to the point.
00:07:58.620 We wiggle around a bit more, but it works together.
00:08:01.620 I like the chorus.
00:08:05.620 I don't know if I agree.
00:08:10.620 I'm just like.
00:08:11.620 Do you know what?
00:08:12.620 I know.
00:08:13.620 I know.
00:08:14.620 I'm the worst of that.
00:08:15.620 You're not even doing it this time.
00:08:16.620 You've got a whole chorus here.
00:08:18.620 I'm the worst.
00:08:19.620 They always roast me in the comments.
00:08:21.620 And that's why I'm sitting there laughing because I think normally it's Pearl and every woman is doing it. 0.98
00:08:25.620 I've been trying to get better.
00:08:26.620 I've been trying.
00:08:27.620 After the bees interview, I've been trying. 0.95
00:08:30.620 She normally sits there going, hmm. 1.00
00:08:32.620 It's like, ah, it's a take.
00:08:34.620 I can't.
00:08:35.620 No, it's just a thing, innit?
00:08:36.620 Because all the women are doing it. 1.00
00:08:38.620 One person made a comment and I'm just saying, listen to the choir.
00:08:41.620 Is it the choir?
00:08:42.620 And the choir said, hmm.
00:08:44.620 LAUGHTER