JustPearlyThings - May 07, 2023


Modern Woman Chooses To Live In Denial


Episode Stats

Length

6 minutes

Words per Minute

201.60324

Word Count

1,291

Sentence Count

114

Misogynist Sentences

8

Hate Speech Sentences

3


Summary

In this episode we talk about what it takes to be a good parent and how important it is to have a good relationship with your partner. We also talk about the benefits of being a good Dad and what it's like being a single parent.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 I mean, the data honestly shows that half of us aren't going to have kids.
00:00:04.400 50% in here, single and childless.
00:00:06.480 If you hit 30 and you're still single,
00:00:08.600 if you hit 30 and you're still single,
00:00:10.760 your chance of having a kid drops below 50%,
00:00:12.960 so you're actually more likely to not have a kid than have one.
00:00:15.340 Is that just females?
00:00:16.300 Mm-hmm.
00:00:16.720 Yeah, women.
00:00:17.440 I rebuke these stats, and I...
00:00:19.660 No, it's not like rebuking.
00:00:22.260 I think it's good for women to know.
00:00:23.940 It is.
00:00:24.220 Because that's what's going to happen if, like, you know...
00:00:27.020 And it's a fact as well, like, your eggs just pop them.
00:00:29.840 Yeah, yeah, we know that, yeah, but...
00:00:32.400 90% of your eggs are gone by 30,
00:00:34.460 and then they sell you IVF as an option,
00:00:36.980 but the majority of IVF treatments don't work.
00:00:39.620 So the majority of women that go get, like, IVF,
00:00:41.920 they don't actually get a kid at all.
00:00:44.700 I'm just a firm believer.
00:00:45.980 I feel like the way my life is supposed to pan out,
00:00:48.840 it will pan out just perfectly.
00:00:50.840 And, yeah, the stats are important,
00:00:53.080 but I just feel like if I'm not ready now and I'm ready later
00:00:57.040 and it doesn't happen, maybe it just wasn't meant to be.
00:01:00.100 I'll just leave it to life.
00:01:02.400 Yeah, I think a lot of women feel like that,
00:01:04.080 but, you know, then they hit 45 and they're on antidepressants
00:01:07.140 and more depressed than any other group.
00:01:09.100 Like, women over the age of 45 are more depressed
00:01:11.840 than any other group, like, more anxious.
00:01:13.740 And the same thing, like, body count is associated
00:01:15.540 to all those things, like anxiety, depression.
00:01:18.340 Like, I can't remember the list off the top of my head,
00:01:21.040 but there's a bunch of, like, negative, like, things
00:01:23.880 that are associated, like negative mental health
00:01:25.840 with high body count.
00:01:27.200 And sometimes you don't really know when you're ready
00:01:29.300 until it happens.
00:01:30.220 So a lot of, like, my brother has a baby
00:01:32.160 and he thought he wasn't ready to be a dad
00:01:34.580 until baby happened and he's a great father.
00:01:37.440 Yeah, you become ready, right?
00:01:38.500 Yeah, sometimes you need the moment to understand
00:01:41.440 what you can and can't do, if that makes sense.
00:01:43.840 The women that are depressed, do they have children?
00:01:48.780 No.
00:01:49.220 No?
00:01:49.660 Yeah.
00:01:50.820 That's sorry.
00:01:51.440 I might not have said childless, single childless.
00:01:53.640 Yeah.
00:01:56.840 Do you think you're above average
00:01:58.280 and what would you bring to an above average man?
00:02:00.520 I would say I'm currently average
00:02:02.000 because I have a lot of improvement that needs to happen.
00:02:04.820 Um, my man is above average
00:02:07.860 and what I bring to the table, as a sense,
00:02:14.500 is, um, same thing you said, babe.
00:02:17.780 I am very nurturing.
00:02:19.480 The job that I have allows me to, you know,
00:02:23.400 I feel like I'm going to be a very good mum.
00:02:25.980 I feel like I'm very caring.
00:02:27.820 Um, money-wise, I'm able to take care
00:02:32.020 of certain things as well,
00:02:33.060 so the pressure isn't all on him.
00:02:35.180 I know a lot of people think,
00:02:36.340 oh, you know, it should be because he's the man.
00:02:38.380 Absolutely, I agree with that.
00:02:40.000 But I want to help.
00:02:41.180 I don't want to feel useless in the household.
00:02:44.560 Um, even if I'm just providing groceries,
00:02:46.620 do you know what I mean?
00:02:47.180 A little bit of something.
00:02:48.480 Um, very understanding.
00:02:50.260 I, I listen to a lot of things.
00:02:52.320 My ears are open.
00:02:54.320 Yeah, I think that is, it's important.
00:02:56.740 Um, I don't go clubbing a lot.
00:02:59.700 There's, you know,
00:03:00.520 I haven't been with a lot of people before him.
00:03:03.500 There's a lot of things that,
00:03:05.620 that would make me, uh, worthy, perhaps,
00:03:09.060 of being with someone like that.
00:03:10.860 If you're attracted in a above average man,
00:03:13.200 wouldn't you say you like you're above average?
00:03:15.120 Because you kind of are what you attract.
00:03:16.840 So, he's, he's older than me.
00:03:18.760 Um, and at the moment,
00:03:21.620 I think as humans,
00:03:24.460 we'd, we'd be silly to think
00:03:25.860 that we don't have a lot of growth.
00:03:28.040 There's always room for improvement.
00:03:29.620 I'm not going to sit here and be like,
00:03:30.840 oh yeah, I'm above average.
00:03:31.820 No, babe.
00:03:32.600 I've got shit to,
00:03:33.660 I've got shit to work on.
00:03:34.840 Do you know what I mean?
00:03:35.220 Average isn't a negative thing.
00:03:36.700 No, no, no, no.
00:03:37.720 And honestly, it shows humility
00:03:39.060 that you're like saying that,
00:03:40.420 to be honest,
00:03:41.040 which I think is something men look for.
00:03:44.540 Yeah, perhaps.
00:03:45.260 Um, but yeah, even for myself,
00:03:47.340 I know that I've got a lot of growth
00:03:48.660 that needs to happen.
00:03:50.220 So, yeah.
00:03:51.220 What are you looking to improve on?
00:03:54.080 Um, work-wise,
00:03:56.200 I can make a lot more money.
00:03:58.280 I can improve in that area.
00:04:00.040 My, my body can be a lot better.
00:04:02.780 My hair can be a lot longer.
00:04:04.100 Do you know men,
00:04:04.720 men don't care about money?
00:04:06.280 Uh, yeah, exactly.
00:04:07.760 Um, some do, but.
00:04:10.220 The bums.
00:04:11.400 Yeah.
00:04:11.600 Not men that make money.
00:04:13.620 But it's just, it's just nice
00:04:14.700 if the person that you're with
00:04:15.720 has got ambition, at least.
00:04:16.960 Do you know what I mean?
00:04:17.780 For women, no.
00:04:19.080 With, with the person that I'm with,
00:04:21.120 he doesn't really care about money,
00:04:22.320 but he cares,
00:04:23.060 what are you,
00:04:23.880 where are you going in life?
00:04:24.960 Yeah.
00:04:25.440 Otherwise, I can get with any woman.
00:04:26.760 What are you bringing?
00:04:27.700 What makes you different?
00:04:29.380 So, I've got ambition.
00:04:31.300 You know, what is that I do in life?
00:04:33.720 That's what intrigues him.
00:04:35.260 Mm-hmm.
00:04:36.320 Okay, what else?
00:04:38.040 Um, what do you mean?
00:04:38.760 Are you looking to improve on?
00:04:40.000 So you said money, fitness.
00:04:41.740 Yeah.
00:04:42.420 It's okay if it's just that.
00:04:43.320 I was just curious if there's more.
00:04:44.780 Yeah, money, fitness, mental health as well.
00:04:47.820 I think that's very important.
00:04:49.620 Um, I've still got a lot of,
00:04:50.780 a lot of growth to do in that area.
00:04:52.480 I think we all do.
00:04:53.200 I'm only 24.
00:04:54.000 So, I have a lot more work to do.
00:04:56.980 But, um, yeah, I think,
00:04:59.100 oh, and also being more, more calm.
00:05:01.460 Listening to him.
00:05:02.540 Because I've also been very dominant in the past.
00:05:05.300 He's told me that.
00:05:06.200 So I'm trying to be a bit more submissive.
00:05:08.640 Feminine.
00:05:09.140 Yeah, a bit more feminine.
00:05:10.360 That's it.
00:05:10.800 Where do you, like,
00:05:12.800 why do you think you've been more dominant in the past?
00:05:15.000 Like, where does that come from?
00:05:16.160 Is that something you saw modeled growing up?
00:05:18.020 Or is that just a trait about you?
00:05:19.520 So, I didn't really have a dad growing up.
00:05:22.200 So therefore, I've naturally had to be in,
00:05:24.400 had to be a bit more masculine.
00:05:26.360 I've had to fend for myself.
00:05:27.780 I also grew up in a bit of a hood area, you could say.
00:05:31.420 So, yeah, I came from a bit of a rough background in a sense.
00:05:35.300 But, um, I feel like I'm dragging myself out of it.
00:05:38.540 I'm bettering myself.
00:05:39.700 How do you, because I've always wondered,
00:05:41.660 how, if you didn't grow up in that environment,
00:05:44.360 how do you learn to be, like, a wife or more feminine?
00:05:46.960 Like, where do you go?
00:05:48.020 Um, he has taught me a lot.
00:05:51.380 What I've, what I've seen,
00:05:52.860 a lot of my family members and friends have also taught me.
00:05:55.980 And if you're not willing to learn and change,
00:05:57.680 you're never going to.
00:05:58.640 You have to be able to do that yourself.
00:06:00.840 It doesn't matter what background you've come from.
00:06:03.060 You have to be willing to learn and to change.
00:06:05.960 And then you're going to.
00:06:06.920 It's that simple.
00:06:08.200 As many of you know, I was just banned on TikTok.
00:06:11.640 And we are demonetized on a daily basis on this platform.
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