JustPearlyThings - April 16, 2023


Modern Woman DISAGREE With Pearrl On THIS

Topics
phones ruining men's potential
Hosted by
Hannah Pearl Davis
Modern Women Are too Negative Man Uses Shaming Tactics On Feminine Woman

Episode Stats


Length

9 minutes

Words per minute

196.7

Word count

1,953

Sentence count

137

Harmful content

Misogyny

3

sentences flagged

Hate speech

2

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

A 2017 study found that the number of men aged 18-29 who have not had sex in the past year has tripled since 2008. In this episode, we discuss the impact of sexual inactivity among young men, and the role of masculinity.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.160 Today's topic, we're talking about sexless men.
00:00:04.080 So, a study published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior found that the number of sexually
00:00:10.580 inactive young adults has increased in recent years.
00:00:13.880 A survey conducted by the General Social Survey which found that the percentage of men under
00:00:19.020 30 who have not had had sex in the past year has tripled since 2008.
00:00:23.820 A study published in JAMA Pediatrics which found that fewer teens are having sex than
00:00:29.480 in previous generations, a study found in the Journal of Adolescent Health which found
00:00:35.420 that social media use is associated with a decrease in sexual activity among adolescents.
00:00:42.860 According to a 2017 study, the number of sexually inactive men in the U.S. has tripled in the
00:00:47.900 past decade.
00:00:48.900 The percentage of men aged 18 to 29 who have not had had sex in the past year increased
00:00:54.080 from 9.5% in 2008 to 28% in 2018.
00:00:59.420 There are a number of potential reasons for this trend including the rise of technology,
00:01:03.720 social media, and video games which can be addictive and time consuming.
00:01:07.860 Economic factors such as lack of job opportunities and financial insecurity may also contribute
00:01:14.700 to men delaying marriage and sexual activity.
00:01:17.740 Changes in gender norms and expectations as well as a shift towards more casual dating and hookup culture
00:01:23.540 may also be factors.
00:01:24.700 This trend is not unique to the U.S. where there are similar patterns in other countries
00:01:30.680 including the U.K. and Japan.
00:01:33.600 Some experts argue that the trends towards sexual inactivity is not necessarily a negative
00:01:38.880 and may reflect a broader shift towards a greater emphasis on personal fulfillment and self-care.
00:01:44.520 So, according to the article, the number of sexless men under 30 has tripled in the last decade.
00:01:51.580 Why do you guys think that's happening?
00:01:54.180 So, I don't know about the U.S. yet.
00:01:58.780 I think in the U.K. young people are having sex more.
00:02:03.680 I just think we're not having as much kids like as the previous generation.
00:02:09.520 I feel like people were having kids younger or having a lot of children.
00:02:14.380 I feel like we're just not having kids.
00:02:16.480 We're having sex, but we're not having kids.
00:02:19.040 So, you think they're like lying when they're surveyed about it?
00:02:21.660 I don't know about the lying.
00:02:23.820 Yeah.
00:02:24.260 But from being in the U.K.
00:02:27.580 And how I know guys that, you know, are out here, I don't think men have become, like, sexless at all.
00:02:35.740 I think, sorry, Tretika, you can speak after me.
00:02:39.800 I think also there is a massive change in confidence in men.
00:02:46.160 I don't know what happened with this gender thing, but also there's a massive impact when men is confused
00:02:53.420 and it's playing in their confidence.
00:02:56.360 Like, I think the generation right now, the kids that I'm seeing right now, there's a massive difference between them and the generation that I know.
00:03:04.040 So, boys.
00:03:05.300 What do you think caused that?
00:03:08.380 There's a lot of culture, you know, even the songs that you hear, like Six Figure, blah, blah, blah.
00:03:13.340 I think men are questioning if they're good enough to actually go out and date and take girls out and, you know, be with these type of girls that they fancy
00:03:22.100 or they have to settle for something that they're not, which most of men do.
00:03:26.300 But I think there's a massive crisis, I would say, that's happening to the young generation.
00:03:31.220 And it's the whole songs, the culture, everything that's happening, contributing to the confidence of the young boys right now,
00:03:38.540 comparing to the generation before.
00:03:41.100 And it's a bit shocking, isn't it?
00:03:42.540 Yeah.
00:03:43.040 So you think that masculinity was celebrated before and it's not now?
00:03:46.220 I'm just trying to paraphrase what you're saying.
00:03:48.320 A hundred percent.
00:03:49.320 I definitely think so.
00:03:50.540 So, yes, and it's funny enough, even I think also a lot of men are put in a lid to who they are and what they need and what they want.
00:04:01.280 And their identity has been really, like, there is a crisis of their identity because of what, like, the conversation that we're having and the songs and everything.
00:04:12.840 The whole culture is definitely suppressing that a hundred percent.
00:04:16.320 I definitely think there is a bit of a crisis of masculinity going on with a lot of young men where, I mean, if I think of someone my age,
00:04:23.520 we have so many strong male role models and we didn't have the distraction of this little device in our hands that just sucked in all of our potential almost as men and as human beings.
00:04:36.580 And now men don't have their role models.
00:04:38.700 They almost don't know how to be.
00:04:40.500 There's a backdrop, I guess, of the Me Too movement, a lot of genuine movements that needed to happen.
00:04:44.860 And I think it's left a lot of men discombobulated how they approach women, should they approach women, what's appropriate.
00:04:50.600 You know, if you think a lot of our parents probably met in social settings or, you know, through families, et cetera.
00:04:55.680 But certainly the social aspects of meeting people at the gym, at the pub, at the bar, I think a lot of men are frightened to do that.
00:05:02.820 Some of it is societal like this.
00:05:04.760 I guess some people see it as an attack on masculinity.
00:05:06.520 And some of it is the men themselves' failure to almost move with the modern times.
00:05:13.900 So they've withdrawn into their computer games.
00:05:15.840 They've withdrawn into this world where they're almost just with themselves or with their peers.
00:05:20.600 And they've forgot the art of actually engaging in conversations, chatting people up and doing stuff.
00:05:25.740 And I think also another aspect is I think we're a bit in the victim culture a little bit in life as well, where people see themselves as victims.
00:05:32.480 And poor me, and almost the world owes them something.
00:05:35.460 I'm sure there are a lot of, and I don't mean to be bad when I say it, but a lot of angry men who seem that they, by default, should just have stuff without having to put the work in.
00:05:43.560 So it's almost like an entitlement with guys because they're not putting the work in.
00:05:47.360 They don't know how to or they're scared to do it.
00:05:49.420 But as a result, a lot of them are unintentionally sexless.
00:05:53.040 I don't think they want to be, but I think it's unintentionally.
00:05:55.640 So there's so many different factors that are contributing to it, especially more so with men.
00:05:59.580 And then I guess there's also the factor of women going for that top 20% or the top 30% of men, as we see with these Tinder studies.
00:06:06.820 So most men are not going to pass that standard anymore.
00:06:09.940 So they're going to be left, they're sort of scratching their ears thinking, what can I do?
00:06:14.020 And a lot of them are choosing to withdraw.
00:06:15.380 And I think it's quite dangerous as well.
00:06:16.760 You've seen it with a lot of the shooting and stuff that's happened in America.
00:06:20.760 They can become quite angry and quite disaffected and it can become quite dangerous for society.
00:06:26.060 Can you expound a little bit more what you said that you said phones are ruining men's potential?
00:06:30.960 Yeah, because phones are this illusion of life, but it's not real.
00:06:35.620 So if you're always got your head in your phone or you've got your head in video games, how the hell do you, how the hell do you become who you're born to be?
00:06:42.980 How the hell do you, you know, get the level of charisma, the level of confidence you need if you're always in the phone?
00:06:48.060 It's not a real world.
00:06:49.500 You know, go and talk to that woman at a bar. 1.00
00:06:51.200 Go and talk to that woman on the street. 1.00
00:06:52.880 Go and engage with an actual human being rather than your phone.
00:06:55.620 It's very easy, I think, to be buried in your phone.
00:06:58.200 And the more you do it, the more disengaged you are from actual real world where you need to speak to people.
00:07:03.220 But you can't blame them.
00:07:03.940 And it's actually, there's so many, there's so many different factors that are contributing to them needing almost, I guess, they feel they need to disengage from society.
00:07:12.680 And I think also the access to corn as well.
00:07:14.940 To what?
00:07:15.360 Access to corn, how easy it is.
00:07:17.360 I can't say the word.
00:07:19.860 Yeah, I think that, exactly.
00:07:21.200 Yeah.
00:07:21.480 And again, that's another aspect of your phone and technology.
00:07:24.500 It's much easier for guys to get online and engage in corn and, again, not be engaged in the real world.
00:07:29.460 And then get into this unrealistic world of what, you know, intimacy is.
00:07:34.600 For them, intimacy, if it's just porn, that's not intimacy.
00:07:36.780 That's just one side of it.
00:07:38.780 But real intimacy is engaging, it's sharing, it's being vulnerable, it's allowing yourself to be seen and to see others.
00:07:44.840 And they're not engaging in that anymore in that same way.
00:07:47.380 Do you think that's true for men and for women?
00:07:49.300 I think more so, for me, we were just speaking about this before everyone came in.
00:07:53.080 I think it's genuinely harder for men because men have to graft.
00:07:56.980 No one's coming to save a man.
00:07:58.240 I think society would happily step over a man's corpse.
00:08:02.080 And you see, what, 75% of homelessness is men.
00:08:04.620 Something like, again, similar stat when it comes to suicide.
00:08:07.640 I don't think society cares about men.
00:08:09.940 In fact, people probably laugh.
00:08:11.720 Oh, men are not having sex.
00:08:12.780 Oh, it's just funny, you know.
00:08:14.520 So there's all these different things, you know.
00:08:16.180 And I think, and because I do a lot of advocacy for men, I think for my stance is men need to be responsible for the state of their lives.
00:08:25.060 I don't necessarily think society owes them anything.
00:08:28.040 I'd love society to care about men, to care about masculinity, to see the value that men bring to the world.
00:08:33.600 But society may not.
00:08:34.720 In fact, the trend seems to be going the other way.
00:08:36.340 I want men to start actually looking, what can I be responsible for? 0.57
00:08:39.880 Let me put my phone away.
00:08:41.240 Let me put down call of duty.
00:08:42.660 Let me actually start to engage.
00:08:44.280 I know that, especially for younger people, it's a bit of a mind field because what was normal for my generation, chatting up a girl on the street or wherever it might be, for some people might be seen as some sort of attack almost.
00:08:53.760 That's what society said.
00:08:55.160 But I think men need to almost stand in their courage and just go for it.
00:08:58.620 And I think if they can do it with charisma, with respect, they can start to engage.
00:09:02.420 But men are checking out.
00:09:03.220 And I think the amplification of that disastrous, not to mention the fact that relationships break down.
00:09:08.820 There are a lot of men from single parent families who are not taught a lot of these things.
00:09:12.860 Also the absence of a father figure plays a massive part.
00:09:19.040 And then these men are raised by women and the women are a bit angry, you know, and they're just like raising them to be scared. 0.88
00:09:28.300 You know, they're not raising them to be, you know, men.
00:09:31.240 You know, they're raising them from a woman point of view that she's been used and abused by men. 1.00
00:09:36.280 So he's kind of lost his identity.
00:09:39.420 As many of you know, I was just banned on TikTok and we are demonetized on a daily basis on this platform.
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