JustPearlyThings - October 07, 2023


Modern Woman UNHAPPY With Husband After 26-Year Marriage


Episode Stats

Length

7 minutes

Words per Minute

194.77007

Word Count

1,440

Sentence Count

148

Misogynist Sentences

23

Hate Speech Sentences

9


Summary


Transcript

00:00:00.000 So to end, we have a Reddit story.
00:00:03.160 They ask us for advice.
00:00:04.240 So us out of the kindness of our heart.
00:00:06.880 She says, I think I want to leave my marriage,
00:00:08.880 but I don't know if what I'm feeling is real
00:00:11.600 or if I would be making a huge mistake.
00:00:13.880 How can I be sure I'm doing the right thing?
00:00:15.960 If I do decide to leave,
00:00:17.540 what can I do to make it easier on my husband?
00:00:19.820 I think I want to leave my husband of 26 years,
00:00:22.680 but don't know if I'm making a mistake
00:00:24.280 or how to go about doing it.
00:00:26.700 I, 48 female, have been married to my husband,
00:00:29.340 54 male for 26 years, together for 28.
00:00:33.660 We have two kids, 22 and eight.
00:00:35.860 I absolutely adore my kids.
00:00:38.180 They're amazing.
00:00:39.300 For a few years now, I have felt that I'm not happy
00:00:41.900 in the marriage and would prefer to be on my own.
00:00:44.260 There is no one else involved
00:00:45.420 and I have no desire to meet anyone new.
00:00:47.820 I was relatively young when we got married
00:00:50.020 and had our first child.
00:00:51.500 My husband is a nice man
00:00:52.940 and hasn't done anything bad or wrong,
00:00:55.200 but I have felt it for years
00:00:56.440 that he's not the one who I want to be with.
00:00:59.100 And it's not his fault.
00:01:00.840 He doesn't give me what I feel like I need
00:01:02.840 from a relationship.
00:01:04.340 I feel he doesn't emotionally support me,
00:01:06.640 doesn't understand me,
00:01:07.780 isn't interested in me,
00:01:08.880 doesn't listen to me,
00:01:10.180 doesn't spend time with me,
00:01:11.480 doesn't have any drive, et cetera.
00:01:13.500 Everything we do together
00:01:14.560 is instigated, arranged, and planned by me.
00:01:17.460 Holidays, days out, meeting friends,
00:01:19.460 birthdays, Christmas,
00:01:20.560 all he does is pay for it.
00:01:22.740 He spends most of his time
00:01:24.360 on his iPad or computer.
00:01:26.120 He doesn't entertain me.
00:01:27.300 I want to be happy.
00:01:30.520 I think this is...
00:01:31.760 She's obviously got to go.
00:01:33.060 This is a terrible life.
00:01:34.540 This is...
00:01:36.140 Oh my gosh.
00:01:37.600 They think I make this up
00:01:38.860 when I say women leave for no reason.
00:01:40.520 They think I make this up.
00:01:44.160 Oh my gosh.
00:01:48.260 I'm actually speechless,
00:01:50.140 to be honest.
00:01:50.460 Okay, first thing,
00:01:51.760 she says she's trying to go down
00:01:54.180 the victim route
00:01:54.780 of we were young
00:01:55.560 when we had kids.
00:01:56.660 Okay, so she's got a 22-year-old.
00:01:58.760 She was...
00:01:59.300 She's 48,
00:01:59.960 so she had kids at 26.
00:02:01.540 Not young,
00:02:02.300 so that's out the window.
00:02:03.920 She says that he doesn't do anything wrong
00:02:06.000 and, you know,
00:02:06.960 I don't want it to affect him.
00:02:08.600 So she loves him.
00:02:11.800 Otherwise,
00:02:12.280 she wouldn't really care about his feelings.
00:02:14.600 And obviously,
00:02:15.140 you're going to care about someone
00:02:16.240 after being with them for that time.
00:02:18.080 They've got two kids together.
00:02:19.820 Look, the main issue I have here,
00:02:21.980 there's two main issues.
00:02:23.200 The first one is
00:02:24.040 I have no desire to be with anyone else.
00:02:25.940 Bullshit.
00:02:27.300 Otherwise,
00:02:27.940 what do you mean by
00:02:28.820 I want to be happy?
00:02:30.100 Define what happiness looks like.
00:02:31.640 Second problem I have,
00:02:32.740 I want to be happy.
00:02:35.780 My biggest problem was
00:02:37.300 all he does is pay for it.
00:02:38.960 Yeah, yeah,
00:02:39.580 that's a big problem as well.
00:02:39.740 I'm like, really?
00:02:40.340 I mean,
00:02:41.080 you have to work to pay for it.
00:02:42.980 Yeah.
00:02:43.540 And why is it that hard to make...
00:02:46.020 Like, I understand
00:02:46.840 women want the men to make plans.
00:02:48.840 But like,
00:02:49.200 is it really the end of the world?
00:02:51.100 It's that whole thing
00:02:51.760 of emotional support again,
00:02:53.080 isn't it?
00:02:53.440 It's that women have this idea
00:02:55.180 that men are going to be able
00:02:56.260 to provide them
00:02:57.000 the emotional support
00:02:58.340 that women can provide.
00:03:00.420 But you need to understand
00:03:02.640 men aren't built like that.
00:03:04.360 Men generally aren't good
00:03:06.160 at emotional support.
00:03:07.720 They're not good
00:03:08.220 with emotional things.
00:03:09.660 Well, then how many emotions
00:03:10.820 can they keep up with?
00:03:12.360 Exactly.
00:03:13.280 I mean,
00:03:13.540 this chick just said
00:03:14.260 he did nothing wrong.
00:03:15.340 He doesn't...
00:03:15.760 This man...
00:03:16.220 Imagine.
00:03:17.120 She's blatantly said
00:03:18.040 there's nothing wrong.
00:03:18.620 Yeah.
00:03:19.020 Imagine this guy's just
00:03:20.300 like living his life.
00:03:21.300 He's like,
00:03:21.580 I have a great wife
00:03:22.480 of 26 years.
00:03:23.800 Two kids.
00:03:24.280 Life is good.
00:03:25.160 Yeah.
00:03:25.740 He's thinking
00:03:26.220 everything's fine.
00:03:27.680 He's like...
00:03:28.000 I bet she doesn't work.
00:03:29.000 I bet that she's just sat at home
00:03:31.380 on social media
00:03:32.600 seeing the Instagram lifestyle
00:03:34.160 and this is all just spewing.
00:03:36.000 And she feels entitled
00:03:37.340 to holidays,
00:03:38.440 days out,
00:03:39.060 meeting friends,
00:03:39.780 birthdays.
00:03:40.040 I'm like,
00:03:40.460 do you realize
00:03:40.960 what our ancestors
00:03:41.880 lived through
00:03:42.620 to get us here?
00:03:44.060 He doesn't...
00:03:44.740 Is he an entertainer?
00:03:46.260 Or did you want to go to a show?
00:03:47.400 He's supposed to entertain you
00:03:48.460 all the time?
00:03:48.880 He doesn't entertain me.
00:03:49.440 I think what we're seeing here
00:03:50.740 is a very bored woman.
00:03:53.400 We're seeing a very bored housewife
00:03:54.940 who doesn't...
00:03:55.560 So should she leave?
00:03:56.800 Absolutely not.
00:03:57.500 Go get a hobby.
00:03:58.240 Go join a group.
00:03:59.480 Start going to the gym.
00:04:00.380 Do something that's going
00:04:01.180 to occupy your mind.
00:04:02.760 Hey, maybe, you know,
00:04:04.340 women love to talk
00:04:05.260 about their problems.
00:04:05.960 Go to therapy.
00:04:06.760 Sit and talk to a therapist.
00:04:07.740 Oh no,
00:04:08.000 that'll make them worse.
00:04:09.220 You reckon?
00:04:09.600 I mean,
00:04:10.480 if she's sitting
00:04:11.120 speaking to a therapist,
00:04:12.120 at least she's not
00:04:12.500 giving her husband anything.
00:04:13.200 Maybe a guy therapist.
00:04:16.260 Oh, I don't think women
00:04:17.740 should be going
00:04:18.140 to women therapists anyway.
00:04:19.160 They just make you crazy.
00:04:20.880 So Lilith and Eve says,
00:04:22.980 leaving my marriage
00:04:24.020 is the best thing
00:04:24.840 I've ever done
00:04:25.440 for myself
00:04:26.020 and my mental health
00:04:27.080 and the best thing
00:04:28.120 I've ever done
00:04:28.680 for my relationship
00:04:29.500 with my son.
00:04:30.920 Your kids may be hurt
00:04:32.100 and sad,
00:04:32.900 but they'll see their mom
00:04:34.120 be her own person
00:04:35.140 and take charge
00:04:35.840 of her own life.
00:04:37.020 They'll have a mom
00:04:37.800 who cares about herself
00:04:38.800 so much she's willing
00:04:40.160 to do one of the hardest
00:04:41.180 things there is to do.
00:04:43.680 Can we highlight that?
00:04:45.380 Your kids may be hurt
00:04:46.800 and sad.
00:04:47.520 Yeah.
00:04:48.220 Okay.
00:04:49.120 This is like,
00:04:49.960 if I had to put this comment
00:04:51.120 as one thing,
00:04:51.860 it's called F them kids.
00:04:53.300 Yeah.
00:04:53.940 That's like,
00:04:54.620 basically,
00:04:55.120 this comment is,
00:04:56.040 yeah,
00:04:56.320 F them kids.
00:04:57.140 What awful woman.
00:04:58.720 They'll have a mom
00:04:59.940 who cares about herself
00:05:01.240 so much
00:05:02.080 she's willing to do
00:05:03.320 one of the hardest things
00:05:04.200 there is to do.
00:05:04.520 But it's back to,
00:05:05.240 it's back to the selfish.
00:05:06.380 I really think more than,
00:05:08.140 more than anything,
00:05:09.240 the biggest cancer in society
00:05:10.980 is like,
00:05:12.100 gynocentrism
00:05:13.280 and narcissism.
00:05:15.360 I think we just have
00:05:16.160 female narcissists
00:05:18.120 everywhere.
00:05:19.820 Well,
00:05:20.120 I think that says it all,
00:05:21.160 doesn't it?
00:05:21.560 They'll have a mom
00:05:22.220 who cares about herself
00:05:23.400 so much.
00:05:24.420 Okay,
00:05:24.720 so that's,
00:05:25.640 you think kids value that?
00:05:27.920 You think kids value
00:05:29.140 a selfish mother?
00:05:31.460 It's just,
00:05:32.100 oh my God,
00:05:32.680 I can't understand it.
00:05:34.060 Also,
00:05:34.740 it's just incorrect.
00:05:37.200 But the easiest thing to do
00:05:39.200 is to leave.
00:05:41.320 So how would anyone value
00:05:43.000 the easiest thing to do?
00:05:44.400 We value the things
00:05:45.280 that are hard to do in life
00:05:46.340 and it's hard to stick around.
00:05:48.360 A 30 year,
00:05:49.300 40,
00:05:49.700 50 year marriage
00:05:50.500 is bloody hard.
00:05:52.840 That's why we see it
00:05:53.920 and value it so much.
00:05:55.040 So actually,
00:05:56.040 you've done the easiest,
00:05:58.060 laziest thing.
00:05:59.240 And they want to be rewarded.
00:06:00.540 That's why it's like,
00:06:01.380 we celebrate single moms,
00:06:03.580 fat chicks and whores.
00:06:04.940 Yeah.
00:06:05.460 Like, yeah,
00:06:05.900 women just love
00:06:06.840 doing the easy thing.
00:06:07.840 Men never do that.
00:06:08.900 They never celebrate
00:06:09.940 the easy thing.
00:06:11.600 No.
00:06:11.940 They never do.
00:06:12.940 No.
00:06:13.780 But, you know,
00:06:14.740 maybe I'm just crazy
00:06:16.560 and a big doomer
00:06:17.500 as usual.
00:06:18.520 Oh yeah.
00:06:18.940 Big doomer,
00:06:19.960 super mean.
00:06:22.040 Right.
00:06:22.300 Do you get misogyny?
00:06:23.580 Do you get like
00:06:24.100 the hatred vibes from me?
00:06:25.680 That's what I keep getting
00:06:26.420 on the internet.
00:06:27.520 I just hate all women.
00:06:29.060 Yeah,
00:06:29.280 I just hate her.
00:06:30.060 She absolutely despises me.
00:06:32.080 Hatred.
00:06:32.960 I don't have to cry.
00:06:34.120 Every woman I meet
00:06:35.160 is just aah.
00:06:36.320 Yeah.
00:06:37.500 Okay, guys.
00:06:38.200 Make sure you like the video.
00:06:39.380 Let's get this video
00:06:40.240 to 2,000 likes.
00:06:41.880 That's the most important metric.
00:06:43.120 Make sure you go subscribe
00:06:44.000 to Christine's channel.
00:06:44.920 Tell them a little-
00:06:45.500 Yeah, come check out
00:06:45.760 my YouTube channel.
00:06:47.580 Christine Grace Smith.
00:06:48.540 You can find me
00:06:49.380 on Instagram,
00:06:50.940 YouTube,
00:06:51.760 and on Twitter as well.
00:06:53.500 And yeah,
00:06:54.320 I basically look at
00:06:55.540 the state of society
00:06:57.280 and I try and present
00:06:59.700 the side to things
00:07:01.000 that isn't often shown
00:07:02.060 in the media.
00:07:02.920 So what I see
00:07:04.120 is common sense,
00:07:05.200 but common sense
00:07:05.920 is no longer
00:07:07.380 very common in the world.
00:07:08.420 So I'm trying to,
00:07:09.200 I'm trying to keep it
00:07:10.440 going for people.
00:07:11.220 I'm trying to keep
00:07:12.040 common sense a thing.
00:07:14.200 I'm trying to keep
00:07:14.700 it common,
00:07:15.280 but hey,
00:07:16.260 you'll only know
00:07:16.860 if you go check it out.
00:07:17.980 So I'll see you over there.
00:07:19.140 All right, guys.
00:07:19.900 Like the video
00:07:20.460 on your way out,
00:07:21.200 subscribe to the channel,
00:07:22.240 and I'll talk to you
00:07:22.820 next time.