JustPearlyThings - April 16, 2023


Modern Women ADVICE To Men


Episode Stats

Length

13 minutes

Words per Minute

215.92682

Word Count

2,998

Sentence Count

1

Misogynist Sentences

12

Hate Speech Sentences

5


Summary


Transcript

00:00:00.000 what's your advice to men what's a pickup line that you like i don't have like a specific pickup
00:00:04.340 line but i'd say be confident not arrogant and be just be straightforward what's the difference
00:00:09.320 between confidence and arrogance well i feel like in the context how good looking he is
00:00:13.700 no i feel like with the context that we're talking about you don't want to come off as
00:00:18.900 i know i'm coming to get you and i'm getting you and i'm i've got you do you get one do you know
00:00:23.460 i think confidence is i don't mind getting rejected but if you reject me i'll walk off
00:00:28.960 like a man and i won't oh you're dead anyway or do you know oh that's the worst if a guy gets mad
00:00:34.240 yeah that's a uk thing though yeah like for example no that's not just a uk and that happens in sales
00:00:40.040 too right i don't know if you saw that in sales but like i did sales for a summer just see how it
00:00:43.300 translates to game and there's like rookies that go up the door and the guy slams the door in their
00:00:47.760 face and they're like yelling stuff at the guy whereas like a veteran is like okay that person's
00:00:51.660 not interested and they don't take it personally yeah versus like trying to get even no in the uk
00:00:55.740 guys take it personally they'll be like oh you're ugly anyway but that's young guys
00:01:01.540 i don't find it that common i just like here and there yeah yeah yeah i don't know it depends
00:01:08.180 um so did you have a line or no i don't have a line but i'd say me personally i like it when a guy
00:01:15.520 starts off with a compliment but not an obvious compliment not anything to do with my face whether
00:01:20.180 it be something about my style or the way i carry myself oh so if a guy compliments your style
00:01:24.180 yeah something yeah what good or bad that's good yeah that's cool okay uh what about you
00:01:30.900 yeah i usually like i start complimenting their style or something that because like if i'm
00:01:36.720 approaching a person like uh for sure it's because there's something that i'm interested in that
00:01:41.580 person oh they approach you oh yeah but i'm approaching approaching you what yeah so tell
00:01:48.940 you why you approach me oh i think you're really cool yeah like you seem really cool what's your
00:01:53.580 name oh can you talk oh let's change contacts oh that's a compliment still yeah what do you like
00:01:59.580 that one yeah i mean as long as i got like the biggest problem i've seen is that like a lot of
00:02:03.340 coaches say like come in and say oh you look like you like this or like you know just say really cheesy
00:02:08.540 fancy gimmicky stuff where they're like using lines or like you know these these clever pickup lines or
00:02:13.960 like different stuff like that and that just has like this air of like this is a little tactic that
00:02:18.760 i'm trying to win you over with like all the common theme between all the responses is they want the
00:02:22.880 guy to be like genuine and actually like showing that he's interested without hiding it right like
00:02:28.180 guys that come up and ask you for directions like it's obvious that they don't want directions
00:02:31.660 yeah but like you like lose maybe a little respect because he's not having the balls to be
00:02:36.440 through for him and that's the iron if you think about it you only get good at that if you deal
00:02:40.820 with rejection right because it's almost the emotional calibration you have to deal with the
00:02:44.940 rejection to get that didn't work that didn't work or that didn't work with that type of woman so you
00:02:48.680 have to do that in order to have the hey how's it going how you doing that's the beauty of rejection
00:02:52.980 what's your line my line oh um yo what's happening
00:02:59.740 i have to own that but also i want you approached him yeah okay how what line did you use
00:03:13.840 it wasn't really a line it was an ultimatum a little bit if you don't want me there's lots of
00:03:20.180 men doing she really played the kind of manipulation with it but we were good friends for a long time
00:03:25.940 though to be honest i've seen him did you friends on him or did she friends on you no no one friends
00:03:31.060 on each other when i first saw i was in a relationship so and then we just became friends
00:03:35.520 we're doing a lot of the same coaching and self-development together and then when i got
00:03:39.180 single she kind of did the ultimatum if look you better take me now because if you don't someone
00:03:43.880 else will want me you know but for the minute i first saw it was just like love at first sight
00:03:48.520 but i was in a relationship that's crazy i wasn't a relationship how long until you dumped the
00:03:55.800 that's not i'm assuming you dumped her no i didn't dump the girl because of her it just didn't work
00:04:00.020 out well how did you not dump her if it was i thought it was love right because there's some
00:04:05.080 holes in the story where i met the context i met we were doing a lot of self-development training
00:04:10.760 massive and self-development country um company and integrity was a very important thing in terms of
00:04:17.560 the training we were doing and i had to learn that because i've come from a culture of just
00:04:20.520 chatting up girls willy-nilly right but i still never really believe in cheating necessarily i've
00:04:25.200 always because my parents have been married for 60 plus years i've always believed the monogamy and
00:04:29.160 the rest of it but from an integrity point of view i was already in a relationship so straight away i'm
00:04:32.960 not going to even go there i can acknowledge oh my god she's beautiful that's exactly the kind of
00:04:37.320 woman i want to be with but because of my situation i was like i'm not going anywhere near there
00:04:41.140 and when it naturally ended and i was single and we were friends for ages she then made the move and i was
00:04:47.140 like hell yeah i'm up for it because for the minute i met you you were perfect you know
00:04:52.500 yeah i don't know what i don't know what to feel about that i don't know whether to be like
00:04:56.740 respect or be like no iris but what if it worked out with the girl you're in the relationship with
00:05:01.860 yeah i would never have got into a relationship with her you'd have been in love she was an opportunist
00:05:07.540 that's not a bad thing it's not a bad thing i own my action i've seen that guy and there's a lot of
00:05:13.620 values that he have that i value now here's the thing right even though he was in a relationship
00:05:19.140 i didn't really interfere at all we were friends we'd probably chat once every now and then now when
00:05:25.460 he was uh not in that relationship i was not his type anymore because when he met me i was the perfect
00:05:31.860 size you know i was the perfect look i lost it i had to work my you know self to be that person and
00:05:39.700 that's something i own who i am you know i mean i know exactly what i want and if there is an
00:05:44.740 opportunity of course i'm gonna go for it you know there's no shame about it yeah go for what you
00:05:49.620 want yeah yeah and my advice for guys because i know that's the question is don't listen to women
00:05:55.860 they're most of the time they don't know personally i don't know what i want from a man go and find
00:06:00.580 someone that inspires you a man that really have that perfect relationship there's so many coaches
00:06:06.260 out there coaching you about relationship but they're not in one go and find a relationship
00:06:10.020 that inspires you and get his advice he will be able to open his heart and share his advice with
00:06:14.500 you so question for the women have you ever approached a guy and have you ever been rejected
00:06:22.580 no yes yes yeah oh cool okay tell me tell me no i've approached but not been rejected oh you've never
00:06:28.820 been rejected you have you approached yeah have you been rejected yeah what happened um it's just
00:06:35.380 when i open up and say what i want for my future and what i like for example that i want to be
00:06:40.260 married and i want to have a family they tend to be like you said that immediately yeah oh yeah okay
00:06:46.660 pretend i'm the guy well not at a bar not at a bar say oh i want to get married like on the first date
00:06:51.300 or something like that yeah on the first date i'm talking about like approaching a guy like cold
00:06:55.060 approach oh no no no no no never have you ever cold approached uh i think i have at a bar at a club
00:07:02.820 yeah they're always into it yeah okay what about you have you ever cold approached no no no have you
00:07:08.260 ever cold approached i don't think so no that's interesting right i would know i don't know i don't
00:07:16.660 have been said yeah i have no never yeah you've never coded but but what about you have you ever
00:07:25.620 approached a guy yeah were you ever rejected yes really yeah how what do you say um i remember like
00:07:33.940 once i was like in the grocery there was this really hot guy like it was like john like exactly
00:07:41.060 no it was like my type like this and then i was like oh my god but i was like you know it was like
00:07:46.980 civil engineer working a site construction so well like almost like the majority of my time i wasn't
00:07:54.100 like dressed up i wasn't like cute it was like with boots like jeans like you know and then like
00:08:00.740 he came up to him and he said oh i'm sorry i'm married and i said okay oh but he's married that's
00:08:06.660 good yeah but it happens and i think like when i was younger too like i i don't know i think getting
00:08:14.660 rejected is like part of life yeah i'm curious from the guys is there a rejection that was like your
00:08:21.860 worst rejection that you can think of well i've called the push like probably tens of thousands of
00:08:26.260 times but you know every now and then there'll be a girl that just tells you to fuck off or like
00:08:30.580 tries to insult you personally or something like that and that that can hurt sometimes right you get
00:08:34.740 over that like you just you just learn that's gonna happen sometimes but especially for like
00:08:39.540 clients that aren't used to approaching if they hear something that early on where the person says
00:08:43.860 like oh no i don't like you because of this and this that sticks in their head and they think
00:08:47.460 every girl thinks that and it can be like debilitating and i can take them out of the game
00:08:51.700 um i think for me the first the worst approach um rejections i can remember is when they don't say
00:08:57.620 anything they pretend they don't hear you no they look at you like how dare you even think you have
00:09:03.700 what it takes to come up to me and they don't say it's just everything in the eyes is saying that
00:09:08.820 and you feel like some girls when they don't hear you too like they just stand there but they'd be nice
00:09:13.380 if they're pretending they don't think they're the ones that hurt you and they're looking at you like
00:09:17.300 you almost insulted that you come up to them that happened to me like two days ago with the girl
00:09:23.860 okay i i just was complimenting her outfit i was like oh my gosh that's so cute she just looked at
00:09:28.740 me no and i know she's i know she heard me and then she just like kept like because i was sitting at
00:09:35.060 like a table bar you know what i mean and she just kept she just like looked the other way okay then
00:09:40.420 then i go to this other place right and she's there and then she starts talking to me and she's like can
00:09:46.420 you take my instagram picture i'm like i just said hello before yeah so i feel you that that was
00:09:56.500 hard but that was when i was young now i'm like it's it becomes almost like funny though like in
00:10:01.300 the beginning like if a girl would ignore i'd be like oh my god like i'm horrible yeah but now like
00:10:05.220 if i go out to a bar and i'm like hey i want to meet you real quick and the girl's just like
00:10:08.260 pretend she isn't here i'll be like i know you're hearing me can i just talk to her a second if they're
00:10:11.940 still not responsive then i'll just walk away you know i just walk away right away but it doesn't
00:10:16.420 even register you get to the point i mean if i was single as well it's like you just don't care yeah
00:10:20.420 but it's almost like it's almost like funny too you're like look at this okay the chat is saying
00:10:24.340 tell me you didn't take your picture i did i'm not even gonna tell me you social pressure wow
00:10:32.420 i was just like what because i was so confused because she just handed me her phone and then
00:10:36.980 she starts like doing these poses was it a half of us it was a full instagram like it was like it was
00:10:44.100 in a restaurant so it was just like she's in the restaurant the servers are walking by and she's just
00:10:49.620 like doing these full out like and you were taking pictures and she was approving them or not yeah
00:10:54.340 again no no it was just because i was kind of confused did you ask her why she ignored before or no
00:11:00.180 no that's even worse i was just kind of taken aback to be honest i was just like is this what men
00:11:05.060 go through like when they go on a date that is what men go through yeah i was like i feel like i'm a part
00:11:12.500 you had one minute of a lifetime for so many men yeah yeah i was like i don't like this
00:11:17.060 look at that woman that became a man for a bit wasn't it the story where she became a man for a
00:11:21.620 bit she committed suicide she unalived herself as they say yeah she was only a man for a short time
00:11:27.300 well i don't think most women like i don't think we really noticed the privilege we're given
00:11:31.620 in society just from being young women where we're like treated better by people and the first time
00:11:37.300 this happened to me i um i worked in a sales job and i was the only girl in the office and people
00:11:42.260 would always help me with whatever i wanted you know what i mean yeah and all the guys around me would be
00:11:46.580 like oh it's because you're a girl it's because you're a girl and i was like no it's because i'm
00:11:49.780 so bubbly and i work hard yeah okay yeah and then i found out it was in fact because i was a girl
00:11:56.900 because i feel like you're not even in like a romantic way but i think that men just have more
00:12:01.380 of an inclination to like help yeah yeah they're more fun than helping a guy what it's more fun than
00:12:06.820 helping a guy yeah even if it's not like it also goes the other way though because then there's also
00:12:11.620 the sense of not taking women as seriously as well so it flips doesn't it i've never like i've never
00:12:18.020 felt that was an issue to be honest and i've worked in like predominantly male dominated fields i think
00:12:23.940 it's an advantage not a disadvantage yeah but i think you've probably learned how to you know your
00:12:28.340 powerful woman so you've learned how to i'm the same i will always circumnavigate whatever you know
00:12:34.020 limitations to site based on me based as a black man for instance i don't care yeah some people don't
00:12:39.140 learn that skill so they actually internalize no i'm not enough i think it's an excuse i think
00:12:44.100 there's zero limitations as a woman like zero none unless it's like a strength i agree i'm gonna lie
00:12:49.540 yeah i i feel like the girls that whine about going to corporate and having a hard time like i just
00:12:54.420 think it's an excuse they're just big whiners i don't think so pearl i have to say there is there is
00:13:00.580 listen there's women do get treated by compassion people help them out but there's also the view of like
00:13:07.540 oh woman is a weaker than a man and there's nothing wrong with that logic like physically
00:13:11.460 woman is weaker than a man but if a woman's trying to get some level of finances or authority she will
00:13:19.860 definitely get a backlash of like you're a woman i disagree i think there's quote there's quotas for
00:13:24.580 women i think women get put in positions they shouldn't be in all the time as many of you know
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