JustPearlyThings - June 16, 2023


Modern Women Learn This When Its Too Late


Episode Stats


Length

8 minutes

Words per minute

203.10478

Word count

1,727

Sentence count

28

Harmful content

Misogyny

14

sentences flagged

Hate speech

10

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, we discuss the importance of a traditional mindset when it comes to a relationship with a partner and how to deal with a man who doesn't share the same values as you do. We also talk about the benefits of being in a 50/50 relationship and what it takes to be a good partner.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 Think that they have all these options because naturally when they go for a break-up with a man or they go through stuff
00:00:04.240 They've got loads of men for in the DMS, but women are quite naive. They really think that these men are gonna marry 1.00
00:00:14.120 Have you watched me say that a fresh and fit
00:00:20.220 Like yeah, look who this in my DM. I'm like, yeah, he wants to smash just wants it. Yes, exactly
00:00:23.760 No, yeah, don't have as many options. You think they know leave you man. That's good for you
00:00:26.880 That's how that was you might it was a good man for you initially you might be going through some stuff
00:00:30.420 You leave him and now you wonder why you've got 30 buddies and it's not even that you want to sleep with these people
00:00:34.260 You're just getting sold a dream and you're too naive to distinguish what's right and what's wrong if a man has a good intentions gonna marry you
00:00:39.000 Yeah, and that's that's what he says is a thousand percent correct because these girls think like all these dudes are after me 0.99
00:00:45.660 And each dude is like my choice of a perfect relationship is like no the majority of these guys
00:00:52.200 I would bet ninety five percent of these guys just want to hit it and get out of yeah, you know
00:00:59.060 But they they're so delusional because we lived in this narcissistic culture and this is not in a diss on women
00:01:05.200 But it just the reality of the situation is pretty true. You have social media. You have the government you have movies
00:01:11.980 You have music you have video games telling women 0.99
00:01:16.820 24 7 365
00:01:18.820 You're amazing you can do whatever you want. There's no consequences what you can do
00:01:22.840 Mainly because you're a woman 1.00
00:01:24.780 So I feel sorry for these girls because they believe this shit and they think like oh, yeah 0.99
00:01:28.320 I just have all these infinite options next thing. You know they wake up they're 35 and they're crying on tiktok because they're single
00:01:33.640 This is why this is why this is why I invest so much into you know cosmetics
00:01:38.100 Well, I just think it's either we're equal or we're not. Yeah, like you either think you're an equal
00:01:42.920 So behave like an equal you don't need child support. You don't need alimony. You're you're an equal
00:01:48.620 You're a man
00:01:49.380 They're equal
00:01:50.640 Well, what percent actually pay 50% of the bills you're equal. That's your partner, right?
00:01:56.400 That's what everyone says here. This is my partner
00:01:58.280 I've seen a number of articles recently though by older women who've who've divorced their husband, you know
00:02:03.520 And then it's like 10 years later and they're like oh shit. I shouldn't have done that
00:02:06.340 You know like I thought I thought the pastures were greener and actually now I'm on my own
00:02:10.140 You know, the grass is not greener on the other side of the fence at the grass is greener where you water it
00:02:16.760 Endure
00:02:17.800 Endure
00:02:19.800 I have a question for the ladies 1.00
00:02:23.960 Should you listen to your husband point-blank period yes or no?
00:02:31.800 No, I mean it's a yes or no only
00:02:34.620 Your husband says do something you don't want to know I just refer back to you just said that we're supposed to be equal
00:02:41.960 So you're gonna pay off the bills you're gonna find that you're gonna find the burglar when he comes in the house
00:02:47.820 The last guy I
00:02:49.820 Stopped the last guy you got to go down there
00:02:52.640 Do you want to be in like a 50 50 partnership is that your ideal relationship? 0.87
00:02:57.200 No
00:03:03.200 Traditional relationship with a 50 50 mindset no, it's not a 50 50 mindset. I just understand there's certain things where
00:03:11.520 We have a saying it's the man is the head, but the woman is the neck you need both to to to you know to turn around 0.99
00:03:19.680 It's not just the head. That's like feminist Christian. No, no, it's not about feminists 0.73
00:03:24.960 But what I'm saying is it takes two to tango. Okay. I'll give you a different one. It takes two to tango
00:03:29.440 So it doesn't matter who leads if the other one doesn't move you don't get in the right direction
00:03:34.840 So I believe that there are certain things where my man will stamp his foot and if it's important to him
00:03:40.120 I will respect him and I will take his decision, but
00:03:43.780 Sometimes there will be things that are equally important to me where I would like to find a counterpart
00:03:49.680 Who understands me and says this is important to her and therefore
00:03:53.280 She's the one in charge 1.00
00:03:54.680 But that's still a 50 50 mindset because a traditional mindset is he has the final say no matter what yes, but it's not to say
00:04:01.820 He'll never give you your way, but it's still his choice
00:04:04.100 Like that's a traditional mindset if you look at writings of women like 150 years ago 1.00
00:04:08.080 Like the answer would just be yes this whole do I need to listen to my voice of course
00:04:12.560 Of course, it's a conflicted, you know, I'm still 34. I grew up in a very different society, but I'm still here
00:04:19.460 I'm still here today. So of course, I'm absorbing but I'm learning what works for me to be honest
00:04:24.360 Like I've listened to everyone I agree with pretty much everyone says because everyone has a point
00:04:28.680 But for me like say my biological dad didn't stay with my mom
00:04:33.560 He didn't he left us but my stepdad and I call him dad
00:04:37.640 They've been together for 33 years and thriving
00:04:40.600 I'm still matching clothes never been away from another they travel the whole hands and that's what I want and when I was 25
00:04:48.080 Unfortunately, I lost my fiance to cancer. So after that I've been through this
00:04:52.360 I still want to have that what I've envisioned maybe as a
00:04:56.000 As a young girl as a teenager and I still believe it's possible
00:04:59.920 But of course, I still adopt and I'm still here today
00:05:02.920 I don't live in the past and I'm not trying to be this new
00:05:06.800 DM slide kind of woman either. Do you know who said that quote? 0.99
00:05:12.240 The which one man is head with the woman his neck 0.88
00:05:15.540 Tell me who said that there's a Canadian actress named like a Nia Vardalos
00:05:20.580 Basically, it's very popular in Russia. We say that as a
00:05:23.460 Can we dissect that phrase for a second? I've been I've been sitting here. She's a divorced feminist actress 1.00
00:05:28.940 Of course
00:05:29.380 Oh, really?
00:05:30.380 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait
00:05:34.380 The brain is still
00:05:35.580 I was literally saying yeah, that was about my point
00:05:38.380 The brain is still in the head
00:05:39.380 The brain is still in the head
00:05:41.380 You should take the biblical perspective, which is
00:05:44.300 But I've already changed that to tango
00:05:46.540 It's about the movement
00:05:47.540 The woman is the crown on a man's head 1.00
00:05:50.720 It's an accessory
00:05:52.540 Even with the tango
00:05:54.240 Oh, wow
00:05:54.740 Because if you just look at society
00:05:56.840 If you just look at society
00:05:58.620 Listen, because it's like a game of chess, right?
00:06:00.900 The game of chess, the game of life
00:06:03.980 Is to win
00:06:05.860 And sometimes
00:06:07.520 The queen is the strongest piece on the board 0.97
00:06:11.740 Yeah?
00:06:12.480 Do you play chess?
00:06:13.280 She is the strongest, yeah
00:06:14.520 But the game isn't over if the queen dies
00:06:16.540 Yeah
00:06:17.100 Sometimes you gotta sacrifice the queen to make a win
00:06:19.360 And then you can take a pawn
00:06:20.360 And get him to the other side
00:06:21.940 And then she can become a queen 1.00
00:06:23.420 Yeah, but we take it
00:06:24.660 I'm talking about couple dynamics
00:06:26.380 When two people merge together
00:06:28.120 I'm not talking about the rest of the world
00:06:29.920 Of course, he died
00:06:31.140 I'm still alive
00:06:31.780 I'm still living
00:06:32.480 I'm not talking about
00:06:33.240 I'm not talking about
00:06:34.140 Your particular situation
00:06:35.920 My only point
00:06:37.220 I'm not talking about your situation
00:06:39.080 But I'm saying what you said
00:06:40.720 When I said
00:06:41.240 Should you listen to your husband
00:06:42.540 If it's not a yes
00:06:43.900 That's not a traditional mindset
00:06:46.060 It's fine
00:06:47.280 No, and I'm not saying that's wrong
00:06:49.160 I'm just saying
00:06:49.640 You said you would prefer
00:06:50.600 A traditional relationship
00:06:51.880 So I'm just asking
00:06:53.300 How you would get
00:06:53.900 No, that's not what I said
00:06:55.080 I just said that
00:06:56.000 I would still
00:06:57.600 You didn't like the 50-50 1.00
00:06:58.840 Yeah, I don't like the 50-50 0.99
00:07:00.720 But that doesn't mean
00:07:01.700 That I'm sitting around
00:07:02.700 And expecting for things
00:07:04.460 And I'm entitled
00:07:05.280 No, I didn't say you were entitled
00:07:06.940 No, no, I know, I know
00:07:07.740 I'm just trying to explain
00:07:09.340 Yeah, yeah
00:07:10.200 I totally get you
00:07:10.980 I totally get all of you guys
00:07:12.520 And I love the fact
00:07:13.620 That we're actually talking about it
00:07:14.960 Because, you know
00:07:15.940 Sometimes you're so sure
00:07:17.100 About what you picture for yourself
00:07:18.820 Or what you think of
00:07:20.500 And then you listen to another opinion
00:07:22.180 And you understand them
00:07:23.380 And then you refer back to yourself
00:07:25.160 And you think
00:07:25.960 Wait a second
00:07:27.080 But
00:07:27.420 And what do you think now
00:07:29.380 And
00:07:29.940 I don't know
00:07:31.180 But I believe that
00:07:32.160 Once again
00:07:32.940 There is no one clear rule
00:07:34.880 Of what to say
00:07:35.900 Or how to do
00:07:36.920 Or how to behave
00:07:37.860 Well
00:07:38.200 Something that doesn't work
00:07:39.800 In one relationship
00:07:41.120 May work in another
00:07:42.280 But fundamentally
00:07:43.720 Fundamentally
00:07:45.040 Should you
00:07:45.700 Should you
00:07:46.560 It goes back to the question
00:07:48.280 Should you endure
00:07:49.220 Once you've made that commitment
00:07:50.520 In a marriage or not
00:07:51.420 That's the fundamental question
00:07:52.700 Isn't it
00:07:53.060 Yes
00:07:53.480 Also
00:07:55.280 If we're going to go back
00:07:58.260 To the tango thing
00:07:59.120 I've been holding on to this
00:07:59.940 For a while
00:08:00.300 Because it's one of those
00:08:01.380 Things that's in my head
00:08:01.960 Drop it Daniel
00:08:02.580 I'm like
00:08:03.000 Drop it
00:08:03.820 Drop it
00:08:04.060 Because it's like
00:08:04.520 You use the
00:08:05.220 It takes two to tango
00:08:06.520 Sure
00:08:07.120 You're right
00:08:08.280 But even in a tango
00:08:09.660 One person leads
00:08:10.940 One person follows
00:08:12.060 Even in any two man dance
00:08:14.560 One person leads
00:08:15.460 One person follows
00:08:16.100 When people use that
00:08:17.060 It takes two to tango thing
00:08:18.540 It always gets me
00:08:19.500 Because it's like
00:08:19.960 You're skipping a question
00:08:21.040 The question is
00:08:21.620 Would you lead
00:08:22.300 Would you follow his lead
00:08:23.740 And we're using two to tango
00:08:25.560 Which has one leader
00:08:26.600 And one follower
00:08:27.220 But which one are you
00:08:29.140 Are you the leader
00:08:29.600 Are you the
00:08:29.980 Yeah