In this episode, we are joined by a panel of women who share their experience of cheating on their exes and how it was difficult to get over them. We also discuss what it's like to leave an ex and what makes it so hard to leave a partner.
00:00:00.000Tommy Lee is a rock star for those of you that don't know and they I was researching them for this show and they've had just like an on again off again relationship since let me see it says 1994 so they got married after four days of knowing each other yeah after they got married in Cancun Mexico
00:00:24.800and literally they were just on again off again they also had a sex tape that was released during when they were together they had two sons and he also was arrested for abuse and she still actually got he went to jail for it and she actually still got back with him after and then again on again off again on again off again until now they're not together they've separated
00:00:54.720and he's married to someone else and she's single now the reason that I bring this up is because recently she has been doing a documentary and in the documentary she said that she texted at 55 she hasn't been with him for five years she texted Tommy Lee that he is her one true love while he's married to someone else
00:01:16.720damn so my question for the panel was have you ever had an ex that was incredibly hard to get over
00:01:33.060that one for me I would say it was really like my first kind of love so I was at a young age I think I was like 18 at the time when I got with him
00:01:44.500so I feel like when you're at that age especially us women being so emotional I just felt really attached to him and even though I'd see him doing a lot I feel like I'd always want to run back to him
00:01:55.720everything I was doing he just knew the right word to kind of say and I feel like I was too good at getting sucked in
00:02:00.880how long were you on again off again with him so from 18 to when
00:02:05.060from 18 until I was turning 20 so like nearly three years no I'm sorry nearly two years
00:02:11.640okay but that one was very serious we kept going back we initially started talking in like 2019 and then by the end of 2021 that's when we called it quits
00:02:22.860but during that stay during that time period we got together about three times and broke up three times so yeah
00:02:30.660and would you say he was a nice guy or a bad boy looking back now definitely a bad guy a bad boy
00:02:36.840bad guy bad guy yeah what makes you say that just like obviously the age I am now and the maturity I
00:02:44.460have looking back there's a lot of things that he used to do that he'll be very good with his words
00:02:49.060I know now when certain guys say stuff they don't mean it but back then it's very easy to get sucked in
00:02:55.200like I said before and he just used to always know the right words to say which can be a good trait sometimes
00:03:00.060but in relationships especially as a guy and what made it so hard to leave just because he knew the right things to say
00:03:07.680he was selling you a dream pretty much and you know it's that puppy love it was puppy love for me because obviously that was like my first
00:03:14.040real proper like relationship like we moved in together and everything so it was very serious
00:03:19.380and obviously at that age as well I'm thinking like this is some fairy tale going on
00:03:24.580but realizing now and looking back at it now I wouldn't have done so many things that I did do and
00:03:30.640listen to him the way that I did if that makes sense okay you want to go next yeah I feel like my
00:03:38.800the love that I had is kind of different to yours in the sense that mine wasn't a bad guy we both really
00:03:46.780cared about each other and it was was kind of on and off for some time but he went jail and for like
00:03:52.360three years he went to jail yeah but three years so for one but he wasn't a bad guy okay okay so the
00:04:01.480reason why we always want to see the good in the drug deal I feel like I feel like a lot of times certain
00:04:09.040situations it's a cop-out answer sometimes to say oh you're not a situation things like that but
00:04:14.500genuinely for this guy like here the way that um he was brought up from very very young was was not
00:04:20.920good and it kind of like that was the path that was predestined for him but then he's kind of like
00:04:24.940got out of it now and I'm like we're good and everything but for me it was very difficult to get
00:04:31.500over him when he came out of jail um we wanted to get back together but I was like you know what you
00:04:37.000have to change yourself everything like this fast and he took a year to do it and by that time um I was
00:04:43.080like we're not going to get back together but I was still very much in love with him but I had to
00:04:46.540just realize that the amount that I loved him and the amount that I love myself I'm very solid on
00:04:52.660what I want and what I do not want from a man and um he had a child as well and in that time the year
00:04:57.640that he took to change I realized that I do not want to be with someone who has already has a child
00:05:01.060because I'm selfish I want to be fast for a little bit of the relationship at least but um did he change
00:05:06.700in that year yeah he did the total 160 so he was he was a bit like more of a bad guy before and
00:05:12.880then he like changed into more of a nice guy he was I mean he was in jail we can't he was he was
00:05:17.740always a nice guy he's very good got a beautiful heart but I just feel like he saw that there was
00:05:22.660another way to live life rather than the one that he had been stuck in for that time um it just was a
00:05:28.720thing where I realized that as much as I love him and as much as he loves me and all these kind of
00:05:33.880things like there's a greater kind of love like I feel like when you love people and when people love
00:05:38.260you it's a very selfish kind of thing because it's like I love you I want I want you to be with
00:05:42.860me and we're gonna make it work and what I want but I was just like you know what for the best for
00:05:48.260what I want and what you want you can't just keep on going down this path what what made him
00:05:52.460different than other guys that made it hard for him for you to get over him everyone says that they
00:05:58.160want honesty I heard this all the time we're talking about it earlier but he was genuinely very honest
00:06:02.180if he did something bad he did something good like I had a lot of issues of trust and even if he did
00:06:09.680something bad he was honest and it kind of made me accept that you know what even if I might feel
00:06:14.000like people are down a wrong road and I have a stereotype of roadmen that they're that they're
00:06:19.100dishonest and that they like to use words because men know that women want to hear certain things
00:06:23.960right and I feel like men use that to manipulate women and he showed me that you know what someone
00:06:29.660can go be in that lifestyle want better for themselves and not manipulate you words they could
00:06:34.280just tell you the truth and if you don't accept it you don't accept it and then you have to do a sort out
00:06:38.240what you're going to do from there on so you like that he told you what it was exactly yes okay and
00:06:42.260that's what made him different you feel like other guys told you what you wanted to hear where he told
00:06:45.800you the truth and yes and also another thing which I think a lot of men nowadays really struggle with
00:06:50.480is being assertive in a respectful way like he would not allow me like I can be a bit um I think
00:06:57.200everyone can be a bit um push the buttons of it sometimes you know push the boundaries and stuff
00:07:00.680but he always let me know this is not how it's going to be do not continue this behavior and I respected
00:07:06.080that because he knew the right way to do it and a lot of men do not know how to do that nowadays
00:07:09.980they get angry or they don't know how to express themselves or they um blame you and yeah this
00:07:15.080is just not the one okay and what about you right okay so when I um was going out with my ex I was
00:07:24.200very young compared to him so how old are you how old was he okay you're gonna be underage I'm sure I just
00:07:32.180feel it yeah I was 14 and he was 19 sorry shock horror everyone yeah but he actually did ask permission
00:07:44.240from my mom and dad because he was like I really like your daughter and he was he wasn't like a creep he
00:07:51.900wasn't giving creep okay he was giving like gentleman actually and he was very kind and sweet but it was also
00:08:00.900long distance as well so he was living in Holland and I was living here but he would get like
00:08:06.900um I think it was like a 12 hour coach every two weeks to come and see me and he was working like two jobs as well
00:08:15.900at like 19 years of age um but I think from that because I was so young he was my first everything
00:08:23.900as well like first well you know what I mean like first everything and so I think that's what kept
00:08:30.900the attachment for so long but how long were you with him three years three years yeah but I think because
00:08:40.900I was so young I think I was just so excited that like an older boy had liked me
00:08:47.900really and when I look back on it now at 21 years of age I'm thinking I don't think that's too right if
00:08:57.900one of my friends would come to me and say I like a 15 year old what do you think why did your parents allow that
00:09:05.900because they saw how he was because he was a nice yeah he was a good dude I was literally begging them as well
00:09:11.900like if your daughter's growing like I love him you know what I mean what can you do right um but I think the
00:09:19.900attachment was is because I was so young and I think I was with him for that long because I was so young and also
00:09:26.900didn't really know what I want so you you would have said he was a good guy though yeah not a bad boy good boy no he wasn't a bad boy
00:09:34.900no he wasn't a bad guy at all but I'm in a relationship
00:12:47.900But then when he moved on and got into another relationship I then started to feel like actually maybe I still love him and wanted to be with him.
00:12:55.900So it was almost like when he when someone else wanted him I wanted him back you know and then it actually took a while for me to get over him which was strange.
00:13:04.900Wait so you were you were good you were moved on then you found out he was dating someone else and you you wanted him back.
00:13:14.900So he he actually was trying to get me back for a period of time I didn't want to know.
00:13:19.900But then the moment he got with somebody else it was a bit of a toxic trait in me you know I then wanted him back.
00:13:25.900And that that time it was too late because he'd then moved on moved him moved in with someone else.
00:13:30.900And it actually to take me a long time because I sort of thought oh you know maybe he is my my one true love you know.
00:13:36.900He made a mistake but he's still a good guy and I still love him so it did take me a while to get over that one I think because it was that first significant relationship.
00:14:10.900So he was like he was my first ever boyfriend and when I met him I remember this I was at school and I met him he came and chatted me up at the bus stop after school with his friends.
00:14:20.900And I thought he was the most handsome guy that I'd ever seen in my life and I was super flattered that he was talking to me.
00:14:27.900So we dated I say we dated we were in a little bit of a relationship for maybe like a year.
00:14:36.900I think at that time I really convinced myself that I loved him and I was mature enough to know what love was and my friends and my family were like no he's not for you.
00:14:46.900They were obviously seeing something that I didn't see because you're in that bubble of being in love and this juvenile sense of he's my everything like at 14.
00:14:54.900I don't think you can know what your everything is.
00:14:57.900So we were together first kind of intimate experience and things like that.
00:15:02.900And I think that I put that I held that to quite you know on quite a pedestal that I was intimate with somebody for the first time.
00:15:10.900And so this must be love and we're going to be together forever.
00:15:13.900We our relationship came to an end when we was I don't know I think maybe like a year later I was about 15.
00:15:19.900And I saw other people and things like that but he would always contact me.
00:15:23.900So it will be like we wouldn't speak for maybe like six months or something.
00:15:28.900And then I'd randomly bump into him in the street which just kept fueling this sense in my mind of oh my god we're clearly meant to be together.
00:18:06.900I think I think that he didn't take the time to heal from our relationship.
00:18:13.900And if I'm being really transparent I checked out in like the last year of our relationship.
00:18:19.900I checked out he you know he was doing his thing.
00:18:21.900He was unfaithful in the beginning of our relationship.
00:18:24.900It prompted like an open relationship for like a year which I didn't really want to have.
00:18:29.900But because he wanted to have it I kind of agreed with it because I felt like that was the right thing to do.
00:18:33.900I never stepped out and did anything but I would like tell him I was going on a date and I'd go to like my girlfriend's house and just chill with her.
00:18:40.900So that he thought I was going on a date because I knew that he would be with someone else.
00:22:43.900When you say emotional logic what can you give an example?
00:22:46.900For example I'll use a situation with one of my friends.
00:22:49.900We used to get into arguments because I would explain to them you have to pay attention to your emotions and you have to work through them.
00:24:58.900But if you step back and think about it, you think, oh, it might be an accident.
00:25:01.900You get me like, let me just leave this person alone.
00:25:03.900So you're saying sometimes it's about taking responsibility for your own feelings.
00:25:06.900That it's not necessarily like understanding where that feeling is coming from and tracking yourself in that sense.
00:25:12.900It's not about taking responsibility for your own feeling per se, because sometimes the way you feel is the other person's fault.
00:25:18.900However, it's about being the bigger person to your own feelings and be like, you know what, I'm big enough that I can deal with this without projecting it outside.
00:25:26.900And therefore, I'm going to go about this situation with logic.