JustPearlyThings - May 11, 2023


Only Fans Model Gets Put On The Hot Sit

Topics
childhood trauma therapy living in the past
Hosted by
Hannah Pearl Davis
Mentioned
Pearl Tate
Man Schools The Entire Panel On High Value Women Single Mother Recounting Divorce Decision

Episode Stats


Length

9 minutes

Words per minute

239.3

Word count

2,298

Sentence count

215

Harmful content

Misogyny

7

sentences flagged

Hate speech

4

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, I speak to a young woman who has had to work very hard to get where she is today. She talks about how she went from being a care home care worker to running her own business and how she managed to get her life back on track. She also talks about what it was like being in a toxic relationship at a young age and how it affected her life. I hope you enjoy this episode and can't wait to do it again.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.000 How many years did you run your OnlyFans?
00:00:03.740 Probably about a year and a half when I stopped.
00:00:07.760 Yeah, so I was working in the care home and then I started it.
00:00:11.020 And I knew that if I started the OF, my ex would leave me alone
00:00:13.880 because he hated things like that.
00:00:15.060 And I knew that he'd really leave me alone because we were so toxic together.
00:00:18.540 And then I was in work, I checked my phone.
00:00:21.500 I think I made maybe like 2K in that day.
00:00:24.640 And to me, that's a lot.
00:00:25.700 I haven't come from a big family, haven't come from a stable family at all.
00:00:29.480 I think 2K in a day is a lot.
00:00:31.140 And for me it was because I was getting £400 a week from the care home.
00:00:33.980 And I was working 12-hour shifts and five days a week.
00:00:36.860 So to me, that was amazing.
00:00:38.720 How old did you say you are now?
00:00:40.180 I'm 22 now.
00:00:41.180 Okay, so you've been doing it for like three years.
00:00:42.660 Yeah, and then I said to my manager, I need to leave work.
00:00:46.900 I don't really want to be here.
00:00:48.200 And I told her my situation with the OnlyFans.
00:00:50.080 She said to me, just go.
00:00:51.420 So I went and I just never looked back.
00:00:53.900 So why did you pick that route instead of like, I don't know, marrying rich?
00:00:57.900 You know what it was?
00:00:58.560 You were a pretty girl.
00:00:59.140 You were 19.
00:00:59.720 Thank you.
00:01:00.380 You were with the guy for three years.
00:01:02.680 So you couldn't have been, I mean, you probably weren't streeting that much if you were with
00:01:07.380 a guy for three years, were you?
00:01:09.280 Maybe you were.
00:01:10.020 Okay.
00:01:10.400 Yeah.
00:01:10.840 I was a mess.
00:01:11.900 I was a mess.
00:01:12.660 I had no control over my emotions.
00:01:14.840 I felt like I didn't even know who I was.
00:01:16.500 Right.
00:01:16.980 I feel like when you're in a young relationship, you don't even know who you are as a person
00:01:20.860 at that point.
00:01:21.620 You grow to learn who you are.
00:01:23.500 Why ruin your own life?
00:01:24.760 You could have got married, ruined someone else's too.
00:01:26.520 I don't want to get married.
00:01:27.480 I'm against marriage. 1.00
00:01:28.340 I don't ever want to get married.
00:01:29.200 Thank you.
00:01:30.400 I don't like marriage.
00:01:30.640 It wasn't offering.
00:01:31.320 I was just asking.
00:01:31.800 Yeah.
00:01:32.080 No, but I don't like marriage.
00:01:33.180 I just think it's like.
00:01:34.000 No, not everyone wants to get married and not everyone wants children.
00:01:35.980 I know.
00:01:36.540 I just think it's like a shame because there's a way to utilize female beauty in a different 0.99
00:01:40.520 way and still get the outcomes that you want.
00:01:43.060 You know what I mean?
00:01:43.540 Like now you're in a position where it's going to be tough to ever be with a guy long term.
00:01:47.520 Yeah.
00:01:47.980 But maybe I don't want to be with a guy long term.
00:01:50.480 Maybe I want to live with three cats at my home with all my cactuses.
00:01:52.980 What do you want your life to look like at 65?
00:01:55.820 I'll probably be dead by then.
00:01:57.060 So I don't know.
00:01:58.340 I don't think that far ahead because life is just.
00:02:04.020 You really should.
00:02:04.920 I don't plan that far ahead.
00:02:06.220 I live in the moment.
00:02:07.280 Yeah, it probably will.
00:02:08.200 But if it does, it does.
00:02:09.660 I don't really care.
00:02:10.980 Yeah, you do.
00:02:11.780 No, I don't.
00:02:12.780 I think you feel a bit under.
00:02:13.980 No, I don't.
00:02:15.720 You say that now, but then life hits you.
00:02:19.120 Maybe it will hit me, but it's not hit me yet.
00:02:21.960 And I'm here.
00:02:22.900 I'm healthy.
00:02:24.080 You know, I'm living.
00:02:25.340 I've got good family members and I've got friends.
00:02:27.440 Like, you still get it.
00:02:28.440 Like, I don't think women, like, we realize how much we, like, need attention from men.
00:02:32.020 Yeah.
00:02:32.480 Like, we need.
00:02:33.300 Like, we need.
00:02:33.740 I agree with that.
00:02:34.540 And so, like, right now you're still young.
00:02:36.420 You're still attractive.
00:02:37.180 You're still going to get attention from men.
00:02:38.940 But, like, at 40 to 50, women become basically invisible. 0.81
00:02:42.420 Yeah.
00:02:43.460 I know.
00:02:43.760 That does scare me, actually.
00:02:44.860 I thought about that.
00:02:45.480 And so if you don't get a husband before then, like, what does life look like?
00:02:50.040 Your parents will pass away at some point.
00:02:52.980 Your siblings will have their own families.
00:02:54.780 Like, if you don't start thinking long-term, like, what does your life look like?
00:02:58.420 And I don't say this to be mean.
00:02:59.880 No, no, no.
00:03:00.500 It's a good question.
00:03:01.540 Because you're in the position you're in already.
00:03:03.200 Yeah.
00:03:03.400 You can't do anything to, like, to change it.
00:03:06.080 Yeah.
00:03:06.440 But it's like, you know, if you want to be in a position where you're happier, like,
00:03:10.560 wouldn't it make sense to maybe start to put that away?
00:03:13.560 Maybe, but I don't know.
00:03:16.580 No, that's absolutely true.
00:03:17.180 I feel like there's so much in my life I'm trying to sort out first, like, my mental health
00:03:20.760 and my family issues and a lot of my childhood trauma that I still have to deal with daily.
00:03:25.420 So I'm trying to sort that out first because I feel like I can't think straight at the
00:03:28.700 moment with my head.
00:03:29.480 It's just, like, one big tornado.
00:03:31.700 So trauma, like, what do you mean?
00:03:33.260 You need to go through, like, because I never understand when people say childhood trauma,
00:03:37.420 like, I need to go through.
00:03:38.260 When I was younger, I was SA'd and it was my mum's boyfriend.
00:03:42.760 So, like, that was quite intense, you know.
00:03:46.660 I'm not getting upset.
00:03:47.920 It's just a bit, you know.
00:03:49.960 Yeah.
00:03:50.480 So how long have you been going to therapy for it?
00:03:53.680 I was going when I was 16 for a year and then I stopped.
00:03:57.800 I thought I didn't need it anymore.
00:03:59.140 And then I've only been going for about five months now.
00:04:02.220 Well, because it's just the sad thing about therapy is it just seems like they just
00:04:08.260 kind of make money off of their patients instead of trying to get you guys out.
00:04:13.040 And I think a lot of times that's, like, women doing it. 1.00
00:04:15.580 I know maybe you had the bad experience with the guy, but it might make sense to try to find
00:04:19.460 a different...
00:04:20.140 Yeah, I guess so.
00:04:21.360 You know, just because, like, what does your future look like?
00:04:24.020 You have to figure out how to move on.
00:04:25.700 Yeah.
00:04:26.380 Yeah, definitely.
00:04:27.980 Yeah.
00:04:28.480 Okay.
00:04:29.460 And sometimes there are things that you can't actually get over.
00:04:32.100 So looking at it endlessly makes you live in the moment too much.
00:04:36.060 Like, I always feel like I wake up and I'm still living in the past still.
00:04:39.520 Like, my head just keeps living in the past, you know?
00:04:42.280 But, you know, and I've just found that if I focus more on the future, you don't live
00:04:45.620 as much in the past.
00:04:46.640 Yeah, I know.
00:04:47.280 You know, but, like, right now you're not even thinking, like, long term.
00:04:50.100 Yeah.
00:04:50.920 Also, if you had a partner, one that was good for you, not just any old partner, if you
00:04:55.500 were focused on them...
00:04:56.720 Yeah.
00:04:57.080 ...and they're focused on you, then you also wouldn't have to.
00:04:59.580 I feel like that is why I do hate my job, because I don't glamorise sex work at all.
00:05:03.500 I think, don't start it, it does ruin your life, it ruins your mentality, and it ruins
00:05:07.440 how you view men, and how men should view you.
00:05:10.120 So, yeah, if I could sit here and regret doing sex work, I probably would regret it.
00:05:16.600 Only because of the stuff I put on the internet as well, because that's not me.
00:05:20.080 That's just what I've done for money.
00:05:21.880 And you shouldn't have to do them things for money to, you know, you're losing your, not
00:05:27.100 morals, but...
00:05:29.060 It could have been private.
00:05:29.920 Yeah, it could have been private, and I feel like, where I was a bit younger, and I was
00:05:34.300 getting too excited because of the money, I had no parents to guide me, I kind of lost
00:05:38.020 the control, and now I'm in this situation.
00:05:42.460 But, yeah.
00:05:43.960 I'm just thinking there's, like, steps you could take to get out of it, because, you
00:05:47.460 know, it's like, you can...
00:05:49.460 You're able to make savings, put it away, and learn, like, a...
00:05:51.920 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:05:52.420 ...because I'm just thinking, like, you're a pretty girl, there's ways to monetize your beauty 0.77
00:05:56.640 in a different way, you could start a YouTube channel and do reactions, right?
00:06:00.140 Yeah, yeah.
00:06:00.200 You could do...
00:06:00.900 You could do sales.
00:06:03.380 Yeah.
00:06:03.700 I mean, I don't...
00:06:04.780 Would salespeople hire sex workers? 1.00
00:06:07.080 100%.
00:06:07.180 Well, it's what's interesting to me, and this is actually something, like I said, when I
00:06:11.020 was dating a gal that turned out to be a stripper and, like, a really popular one, apparently,
00:06:16.040 what really interested me in her psychology, she was probably the best person I've ever met
00:06:21.240 at just reading men and just understand, like, I don't believe that anybody really knows human
00:06:25.600 nature like sex workers do. 0.99
00:06:26.780 That's so true.
00:06:27.580 They really, like, these girls... 0.77
00:06:28.600 You can learn things, yeah.
00:06:29.500 She can look at a guy, and I guarantee it, I've met you, like, two minutes ago, we've
00:06:33.100 gone on a show, it's like, she can look at a guy and immediately know how much money
00:06:36.280 he has, would he cheat on his wife, and how quickly.
00:06:38.620 And, like, and she knows, she would, you know, you know I'm talking about, right?
00:06:40.660 She's like, yep, of course.
00:06:41.720 Because the gal I was with, she was like, she would look at a guy, she's like, I'm like,
00:06:45.020 oh, that guy's my friend, he was married, she's like, oh, he would cheat on his wife
00:06:47.180 in a minute.
00:06:47.400 And I'm like, really, and she would just know, she's like, I know the look, I know,
00:06:49.700 I know the feel, I know the energy, like, they just understand that.
00:06:52.080 So, yes, it definitely is good for sales.
00:06:53.660 But coming, I know that you did not like sales, and that's fine.
00:06:56.720 I loved sales.
00:06:57.800 I'll tell you.
00:06:58.640 No, no, no, no.
00:06:59.220 I don't mind sales.
00:06:59.920 I hate selling copiers.
00:07:01.140 Yes.
00:07:01.980 We had a guy in our company, we had a guy in our company that's like one of our top sales
00:07:04.580 people, he used to sell copiers, came to us, he likes his life now.
00:07:06.800 But there is something to sales that I think is really, really important tying into this.
00:07:13.180 How you feel and, like, all the emotional stuff, I mean, obviously, like, that's a
00:07:17.160 battle you have to fight, that's a battle you have to win, it is what it is.
00:07:22.120 Everybody has some trauma, not at the same level, you know, we're different, but everybody
00:07:26.440 comes, everybody's family is effed up in some way or another.
00:07:28.860 Like, it's just a fact, we all are, you know?
00:07:30.780 And one thing I'm really glad about, like, when I was 20 years old, and I felt like I
00:07:34.720 was a victim of the world.
00:07:36.480 And I think a lot of people, you know, at a young age feel like they're victims.
00:07:39.080 Like, no, I'm not the best looking.
00:07:40.500 No, I'm not the smartest.
00:07:41.480 No, I'm not this, the, that.
00:07:42.780 I don't have a big brother to teach me things.
00:07:44.760 Because before I was 20, the internet wasn't, like, a huge thing, which is kind of crazy.
00:07:48.680 So we didn't have these podcasts to learn about life, which is why I appreciate what
00:07:52.440 Pearl does so much, because, you know, we get to learn about life.
00:07:55.680 I was really, really lucky to take a sales position where people probably cared about
00:08:01.100 the money I was making, the more than they cared about me.
00:08:03.780 But at least the steps that I needed to take to build myself included a significant amount
00:08:08.160 of discipline, a significant amount of accountability and being honest with myself, because I didn't
00:08:12.460 get paid if I didn't sell anything.
00:08:14.280 So I had to be very brutally honest with myself and extremely disciplined.
00:08:17.800 But what really helped was getting around another group of people around me that were
00:08:21.840 disciplined and growing, and they didn't resent my success.
00:08:24.580 They celebrated my success, and I celebrated their success.
00:08:27.800 And when I failed, they didn't crap on me.
00:08:29.740 They said, hey, you failed.
00:08:31.260 Let's work together to make you better if you want to be better.
00:08:34.080 You know, and so one of the things actually we do in our company is, and I think Tate and
00:08:38.500 those guys have the war room, people like the war room, and I think that's brilliant.
00:08:42.020 I think just giving men a place to meet other ambitious, successful, or striving men.
00:08:46.880 That's better than school.
00:08:48.020 Yeah, and we need that.
00:08:49.260 We do the same thing in our company.
00:08:50.480 Like, we bring guys in, and we literally mold them and work with them to make them more
00:08:54.280 accountable to grow.
00:08:55.240 And do some guys resent it?
00:08:56.680 Yes, they leave, and they resent it because they don't like to be in an environment where
00:08:59.920 they feel like they're not enough.
00:09:01.560 But other guys flourish in that environment.
00:09:03.520 And as a man, I'm talking from a man's perspective, you don't have, like, a woman can cry and 1.00
00:09:08.140 still move into another man's life a couple of years later.
00:09:10.400 Men don't have that option. 1.00
00:09:11.640 Like, we need to be building all the time.
00:09:13.960 And if you feel like you're a dude and you're a little bit victimized, it's time to step up
00:09:17.600 and get around people that will help you grow.
00:09:19.940 As many of you know, I was just banned on TikTok, and we are demonetized on a daily basis
00:09:26.080 on this platform.
00:09:28.000 If you want to help, please consider sending a super thanks below.
00:09:31.940 Every donation helps, and it helps make what we do possible.