JustPearlyThings - November 27, 2023


Pearl Asks Deluded Moderns What They Expect From Men


Episode Stats


Length

9 minutes

Words per minute

201.35622

Word count

1,940

Sentence count

188

Harmful content

Misogyny

16

sentences flagged

Hate speech

9

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, we talk about wine and dine and how to get the most out of your significant other in the dating world. We also talk about how to pick the right guy for you and what to look for in a potential partner.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 Is it more normal to be courted or to, like, hang out here?
00:00:05.500 I think it is more normal to be courted.
00:00:06.620 I mean, in my head, I'd rather get, they got to show more initiation.
00:00:09.860 Wine to dine, that's what she's saying.
00:00:11.740 Wine to dine, wine to dine, we can hang out.
00:00:13.940 I think it comes with age.
00:00:15.200 I feel like when you don't have the money when you're young, maybe not so much,
00:00:19.320 but when you get older and you know the guy can afford to take you on dates,
00:00:22.720 it's kind of a little, it's a little different.
00:00:24.520 So in Miami, I get nice dates?
00:00:26.900 Definitely.
00:00:27.220 Yeah, I think it's normal to be taken out on nice dates.
00:00:31.800 Yeah, normal nice dates.
00:00:33.840 I think it's a 50-50 thing.
00:00:36.700 I think it depends on what you're looking for.
00:00:39.360 Like, to be honest with you, like, I've had, like, both of the experiences.
00:00:44.260 Like, I was married for 10 years.
00:00:45.780 I've been divorced for five.
00:00:46.860 So, like, it's different.
00:00:48.720 Like, I've seen both sides of the fence.
00:00:51.160 And not to say, when I was in a relationship, like, he whined and dined me then, you know?
00:00:55.460 But I'm just saying, like, that courting phase up until becoming the girlfriend,
00:00:58.880 that was a little bit different for me compared to what it seems like is most people's experience.
00:01:03.720 Okay, what about you?
00:01:04.660 So how does it work for you?
00:01:05.900 Talking phase?
00:01:07.560 And how long are you staying?
00:01:09.420 Like, about two months, too.
00:01:12.180 But I would say it depends on the person.
00:01:15.140 Like, if you know, I just want him to give me the best experience he'll give any other woman.
00:01:19.460 So if he's the type of guy that's more, like, emotionally in tune, I just want all of that.
00:01:23.740 I want whatever the most he has to offer, you know?
00:01:26.440 Mm-hmm.
00:01:27.340 That's what I'm saying.
00:01:28.040 It just depends on the girl, though.
00:01:29.680 Yeah.
00:01:30.260 You know?
00:01:31.660 Okay.
00:01:32.100 It depends on your experience.
00:01:32.860 Well, that's what I'm trying to find out from each one of you, so I can get an average.
00:01:37.620 I definitely want to be wine and dined, yeah.
00:01:39.760 Now, at this age, yeah, because I know every guy.
00:01:41.740 So he's going to wine and dine for two to three months, and then you're going into a relationship.
00:01:47.200 He doesn't have to, like, we don't have to go on super expensive dates all the time.
00:01:51.800 Yeah, like, he can take me to just, like, a creative little hole-in-the-wall spot
00:01:56.460 that has really good food, and then on a romantic, I don't know, like, watch, yeah,
00:02:01.740 like, see a nice little view somewhere, yeah.
00:02:04.460 Okay, what about you?
00:02:06.720 I want a date.
00:02:07.860 Like, I want to be taken out on dates, at least for a good two to three months.
00:02:11.560 Yeah.
00:02:11.820 Not back to back to back to back and not crazy things every time.
00:02:15.200 I want to be taken out on dates.
00:02:17.580 So it seems like the talking phase here is two to three months.
00:02:22.480 No, no, no, you said a year.
00:02:24.080 No, no, you guys assumed, I said I knew him for a year.
00:02:27.580 I said I knew the person for a year.
00:02:29.040 Okay, how long was it romantic?
00:02:30.700 It's been about a month or two.
00:02:32.760 Oh, so you've known him for a year, and two months it's been romantic.
00:02:36.240 So he's got about four weeks to pop the questions.
00:02:39.400 Who initiated?
00:02:40.620 Did he initiate, or did you, like, the interest after the friendship?
00:02:44.840 Yeah, it was both, because it was kind of after a friendship.
00:02:47.400 So it was kind of just like, wow, this works so good.
00:02:49.780 Who was dropping the hint, though?
00:02:51.160 Like, who made that move?
00:02:52.400 Definitely both.
00:02:53.240 Like, it was him, and I was agreeing, and then it would be me, and he was agreeing, like that.
00:02:59.800 Flirtatious, back and forth.
00:03:02.240 What about you?
00:03:03.520 How does it work to, you're divorced?
00:03:06.580 You were married before.
00:03:07.880 I was.
00:03:09.020 What's the process now?
00:03:11.620 I'm still trying to figure it out, and I'm five years in.
00:03:14.040 That's how complicated it is, Pearl.
00:03:15.660 So I don't even think we have enough time.
00:03:17.160 Okay, can we get some patterns in the last five years?
00:03:19.720 Patterns in the last five years.
00:03:21.460 I think I would definitely agree that the talking phase is, like, three months.
00:03:25.500 I think in three months, a guy shows you if he's consistent.
00:03:28.420 A guy will show you whether or not his behaviors have changed, because that usually happens, too.
00:03:34.980 Like, you can spot, like, the patterns early on, like, within a month or two.
00:03:39.780 You're even, it's pretty easy, honestly, to judge a guy's intentions, like, within, like, maybe the first week.
00:03:48.300 You can tell, like, what type of mindset you have.
00:03:52.140 It's important to know when's the last time some of the ladies been on a date. 1.00
00:03:54.420 Because some of them probably haven't been on a date.
00:03:56.000 How long have you, when's the last time you were on a date?
00:03:57.420 Last time I was on a date was, no, it was, I mean, I just recently stopped talking to someone.
00:04:05.060 So it was maybe a month ago, not even.
00:04:10.220 Okay, what about you?
00:04:11.640 Who else is single?
00:04:12.640 But before that, it was a long time.
00:04:14.360 It was, like, a year.
00:04:15.220 Because I'm picky.
00:04:16.400 I'm going to be honest with you.
00:04:17.160 I'm very picky.
00:04:17.600 Some of you take forever to find yourself, and you fucking pretty much don't go on dates for years. 0.75
00:04:24.380 And you think you can go back into the dating market, date a guy, but you don't really have any experience dating.
00:04:29.340 Does that make sense?
00:04:30.160 Like, if you don't go on dates.
00:04:31.700 That does make sense.
00:04:32.540 You're not going to know how to date.
00:04:33.780 So who else said two to three months, and who else hasn't been on a date in a while?
00:04:38.440 I don't know.
00:04:38.760 I've been on dates.
00:04:39.200 Sunday.
00:04:40.280 You haven't been on a date?
00:04:40.880 Sunday.
00:04:41.580 Why?
00:04:42.040 Crunch.
00:04:42.820 I haven't really been, I haven't actively been on a date since me and my ex broke up.
00:04:47.380 Because it was, like, a nearly four-year relationship.
00:04:49.460 Probably the most serious relationship I've ever been in.
00:04:51.600 Thought it would be, like, the father to my children, everything like that.
00:04:54.820 So I didn't want to jump into dating until I had, like, I didn't want to rebound or anything like that, you know?
00:05:01.920 How long should it take, though, before you, I mean, are you on Tinder?
00:05:04.640 Are you on any apps?
00:05:05.260 No, I've never been on any of the apps.
00:05:07.220 No.
00:05:08.360 I think that I'm, like, getting close to being ready.
00:05:12.700 Getting close to being ready.
00:05:14.200 What does that mean?
00:05:15.340 She's almost done healing.
00:05:16.820 I've had offers.
00:05:18.160 I've had offers.
00:05:19.300 And I'm just about ready to maybe take some of them up, possibly.
00:05:23.540 Have offers.
00:05:24.920 Okay.
00:05:25.180 Are these guys that you actually are attracted to, though?
00:05:29.640 Because you ladies get offers, but they're a bunch of guys that you don't like.
00:05:33.160 Yeah.
00:05:33.680 Yeah, I would say so.
00:05:35.220 But for me, I'm, like, physically, yes, like, check marks, like, other kind of standards or prerequisites.
00:05:41.880 But you never really know until you're, like, talking to someone and if that chemistry is there.
00:05:46.140 Yeah, that's true.
00:05:46.980 You know, so far as that's concerned, I can't say for sure.
00:05:51.060 But in other more superficial areas, I would say, like, yeah, the box is checked.
00:05:55.080 How many of you ladies are against dating apps, dating Tinder, Bumble? 1.00
00:05:59.800 I don't like apps.
00:06:00.840 Why?
00:06:01.260 I don't.
00:06:01.960 I just, I don't know.
00:06:02.960 I feel like it's capped.
00:06:04.920 It's impersonal.
00:06:06.060 It's creating an image and, like, per se, it might not even be you.
00:06:09.860 So it's, like, I'd rather meet you on site, like, on the spot.
00:06:13.480 Yeah, I'm very much a believer in, like, the in-person.
00:06:18.380 Yeah.
00:06:20.220 When's the last time?
00:06:21.480 So who's been on a date in the past week?
00:06:23.980 Raise your hand.
00:06:25.940 Okay, who's been on a date in the past two weeks?
00:06:29.180 Past month?
00:06:31.460 Okay, past three months?
00:06:34.200 Six months?
00:06:35.700 Red flag.
00:06:37.300 Red flag.
00:06:38.240 I haven't been on an official date since being my expert club.
00:06:41.200 Aw.
00:06:42.520 Who hurt you?
00:06:43.300 What do you justify?
00:06:43.960 I know, I'm so hurt, literally.
00:06:45.840 So hurt, so sad.
00:06:47.160 What's, like, an official date?
00:06:48.420 What do you justify?
00:06:49.720 Like, a guy, like, asks you out and you're kind of, not necessarily courted and wine and dined, but it's an official thing.
00:06:56.400 It's, like, we made this plan.
00:06:58.000 I want to spend this time with you and we show up and do that.
00:07:00.740 I didn't know you.
00:07:01.120 I made a picnic, I think.
00:07:02.540 I mean, I've been in situations where we're hanging out with people and then I end up hanging out with somebody, but it's not like it's pre-planned or anything, you know?
00:07:11.460 I think you just need a vibe really well with the person on a date.
00:07:16.820 I don't know.
00:07:17.560 I mean, I know guys hate that word.
00:07:19.880 You like short things?
00:07:20.760 Vibe.
00:07:21.280 They're, like, short.
00:07:21.940 I'm 5'1".
00:07:22.960 Yeah, so I want to hear dating in Miami from the guy's point of view.
00:07:27.960 So, all right, so typically, how long does a chick make you wait for sex here? 1.00
00:07:35.860 Oh, look at their face.
00:07:38.200 It depends what type of man you are.
00:07:40.200 Okay.
00:07:41.000 That's true.
00:07:42.100 I'm asking your experience.
00:07:45.100 Like, I mean, like, what do you guys justify as hooking up?
00:07:47.980 Like, full out?
00:07:49.020 Yeah, like, I mean, I guess, like, first, second date.
00:07:52.320 First, second date.
00:07:53.580 Wow, okay.
00:07:54.260 So, immediately.
00:07:55.260 All right, what about you?
00:07:57.540 It depends on the girl, realistically.
00:07:59.400 If it's just some you, Miami girl, then, yeah, probably in the first 10 minutes.
00:08:04.400 But if it's, yeah, if it's, I guess, a respectable girl or it depends what she thinks.
00:08:11.520 I mean, there's plenty of respectable girls that could get in the first night, too. 1.00
00:08:14.780 How does that work?
00:08:15.860 Like, fuck the date.
00:08:16.720 Let's get out of here.
00:08:17.400 He's talking about the on-campus girls, for sure.
00:08:20.080 Did you just say, I'm ready to go?
00:08:20.640 Sounds like on-campus girls. 1.00
00:08:21.400 I'm ready.
00:08:21.940 I mean, if they're from you, Miami, like, yeah, they walk through the door and they just,
00:08:25.280 they know it's about to go down.
00:08:25.980 They take their shirt off?
00:08:27.960 They know they're going to get real, yeah.
00:08:30.040 What about you?
00:08:31.220 Oh, not real.
00:08:32.420 That escalated quickly.
00:08:33.780 What would you say the average is?
00:08:36.000 I mean, for me, personally, I would say at least two to three dates, and then I'm hooking up.
00:08:41.680 And I've had some one-night, a lot of one-nighters.
00:08:44.040 Yeah.
00:08:44.480 I'm a DJ, so girls, like, want to be in the DJ booth. 1.00
00:08:46.620 What's your body count?
00:08:48.160 Yeah, for real.
00:08:48.940 That's lost.
00:08:49.940 Yeah.
00:08:50.480 Gone.
00:08:51.000 75.
00:08:51.640 Hard.
00:08:52.000 Okay, that's not that.
00:08:53.620 Well, for a guy, that's not that.
00:08:54.820 Did you guys know that?
00:08:56.300 Pearl said, wow.
00:08:58.120 Whore. 1.00
00:08:59.280 Yes, I'm a whore.
00:09:01.220 Pearl, we know guys can't be whores. 0.99
00:09:03.160 We're more than this.
00:09:03.940 You can be a whore. 1.00
00:09:05.180 We're more than this.
00:09:06.460 The only way a guy can be a whore, if he's banging twos. 1.00
00:09:10.320 That's it.
00:09:10.720 If he's banging that twos? 0.50
00:09:11.300 That's the only way a guy can be whores. 1.00
00:09:12.840 Look, look, look.
00:09:13.200 I think guys can be whores. 1.00
00:09:15.940 Like, I think you can.
00:09:17.540 If you bang enough girls and it doesn't mean anything, I think you can be a whore. 1.00
00:09:21.160 I think they're whore makers. 1.00
00:09:23.200 Exactly.
00:09:24.060 Exactly.
00:09:24.660 Because they're making too much love making.
00:09:26.480 You ever think about 75?
00:09:27.760 I was like, that's 75 wives someday.
00:09:31.520 No, maybe like 25.
00:09:34.080 Yeah, not all of them are going to be wives. 0.95
00:09:35.940 Fair enough.
00:09:38.060 Fair enough.