Pearl DISMANTLED Modern Women with These Stats
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Summary
In this episode, we talk about where have all the good women gone in society? Why are there not enough good women? Why is it so hard to find a good woman? How do we know who the good ones are?
Transcript
00:00:00.000
Hey, we're going to talk about where have all the good women gone.
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So one thing I always hear is where have all the good men gone, right, in society.
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However, I just started looking up some stats, okay.
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The average age of first child is 26, which is before the average age of first marriage, which is 30.
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The average number of partners for a woman is between four and eight.
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And when women get above five partners, their chance of a happy marriage goes from 80% to 20%, depends on the study, plus or minus 10%.
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And if men pick the wrong woman, they can be financially ruined, and their kids can be taken from them.
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And on top of that, 70% of women, 60, 70% of women are overweight in the U.S.
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So the question is, how does a guy identify a good woman?
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And what percent of women do you think are good women?
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I think mostly it's looks, but that's not how they do it.
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If a woman, you know, can really show this man that she respects him.
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What percent of women do you think are good women?
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I would say, good woman, what do you mean by that?
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I think a good woman is probably less than 10% these days.
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So I feel like the reason why there's not much good women out there
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and recover from their past relationships and traumas.
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Would good women not be, like, broken to begin with?
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and they've, like, taken time out to isolate themselves.
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And I feel like maybe then they will be able to move forward
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and find the right partner for the right reasons.
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And I feel like why the percentage may be so low
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is because no one's really willing to do the hard, dark shadow work.
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Because whenever I hear, like, this stuff, no offense,
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like the shadow work, the healing, I always hear, like, nothing.
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Like, never, like, real concrete steps of, like,
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so if you're a woman, you're trying to improve, what do you do?
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So you're trying to, like, your ego, you know, the dark side of you,
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the side that you don't show anyone but it can come out.
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and all the things that you don't want people to see.
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I mean, for me personally, I write down, I journal stuff.
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or things I don't like about myself or that I want to change
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or that I feel I'm expressing maybe in the wrong way.
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you go to a personal trainer and they say, like, good, bad.
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Like, how do you hold yourself accountable to...
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making sure that you're consistently keeping up with things
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Yeah, like, this just kind of sounds like nothing to me.
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No, no, but, like, whenever I hear girls, like, talk about this,
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it just sounds like, okay, I write in my journal
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and I Google things online and I try to be better,
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I think most people don't have anyone to keep them in check.
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then you will make sure that you get that shit done.
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Like, what steps would you show him that I am now healed?
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and less judgmental and more open and vulnerable.
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maybe a male therapist, like, that sort of thing.
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I would not go to therapy for any of these girls.
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They're just getting paid to do what they need to do.
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because I need to connect with a woman that's, like,
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Not necessarily, but I feel like women connect easier.
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because, like, men, like, women are just going to comfort you.
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They're going to tell you what you want to hear,
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we never want to fix it, like, actually fix it.
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they would just sit there and soak in all my issues
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What's your, like, and they call everything trauma.
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It's just so that psychologists can make money off of it.
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Like, I think if a guy goes to war and sees some, like, sees things, that's real trauma.
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But the way we use it today, my ex-boyfriend cheated on me.
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Don't you think there's something called unhealed baggage that we be carrying with us
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because we haven't overcome how we felt in the last relationship?
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But most of modern-day problems are really nothing compared to, like, 100, 200 years ago.
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You could get the plague and, like, die, you know.
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Because I feel like, personally, I've been through so much.
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The reveling in the story is what a lot of the women therapists read.
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And they were, you know, really listening to your story and giving a lot of emphasis to it.
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And the therapists were like, no, no, don't talk about it.
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How did your life change from going from 300 pounds to, I don't know what you are now,
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But basically, I was, you know, I think part of the problem was because I was in therapy
00:08:03.400
for so long, and nobody told me in therapy that there was anything wrong with me.
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And I was not, I didn't have a good relationship with my father at the time.
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And nobody was saying, oh, you need to lose the weight.
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And it wasn't until one day I looked in the mirror and I'm like, I don't want to be like
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And to be honest, the body positivity movement crushed my soul and told me, oh, you should
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be, you know, you're beautiful no matter what size you are.
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You're beautiful no matter, you know, how much you weigh.
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I thought it was okay because no one said anything.
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And I could be sitting here if 300 pounds are now, if I didn't make the decision to say,
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Penelope, you need to get your butt off the couch and work out, fix your diet, fix your
00:09:03.520
Do you think that contributes to 70% of women being overweight in the U.S.?
00:09:11.880
No, I just think that I think that the fact that people are obese and that they make all
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these excuses for, oh, I'm obese because of this.
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I'm obese because you can lose weight no matter what.
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It's just about finding the right way to do it.
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And what do you think of the women that say we need like representation in magazines?
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And not only that, but you are showing thousands and millions of women in the world that it
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is one, okay to be unhealthy, two, okay to be slowly killing yourself, and three, okay to
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go outside and dress provocatively with your rolls out.
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Is there anything wrong with a little plus size girl?
00:10:01.820
Yeah, because what about the people that actually can't lose weight physically?
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But what about people that actually, but they mentally can't, so for the rest of their
00:10:13.260
They need some empowerment because otherwise they could commit suicide or something.
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Do you go to a basketball game and look to see, like an NBA game, or what do you guys
00:10:25.000
You go to a football game here and you try to see average football players.
00:10:29.600
Like below average football players play football here when you go to a professional game.
00:10:37.800
So then why on the cover of magazines, which is supposed to be the epitome of beauty, do
00:10:50.140
I think you're right about the fact that they're doing it to, because, you know, if you want
00:10:54.220
to talk about the health system and the way the world's set up, they don't want people
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to come out of a BCE, so they're going to make it look like it's okay.
00:11:02.420
So why wouldn't we have healthy people on the front of magazines?
00:11:09.000
No, but I was saying that for the people that don't, that actually fit, I think in my head,
00:11:13.420
I'm thinking for the people that actually, because a person that actually cannot overcome
00:11:17.300
obesity, and for the rest of their life, till the age of 60, 70, they're still going
00:11:22.840
Those people are probably feeling, yes, like they're feeling okay.
00:11:28.120
Would you rather be empowered than commit suicide?
00:11:32.480
But when you're overeating, you're slowly committing suicide.
00:11:42.200
And then when my daughter started gaining the weight, I was freaking out.
00:11:48.100
But don't you think there's a certain level, though?
00:11:51.140
And there's, because I feel like the modeling world has always promoted unhealthy, unhealthiness,
00:12:02.420
That would, it looked like they weren't eating at a certain time.
00:12:04.180
If you look at, I always hear that, but I like, I look at Marilyn Monroe.
00:12:09.580
There's a lot of, a lot of women in the modeling world was very slim and they wouldn't eat
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or they wouldn't do something just to fit in a certain category.
00:12:16.680
I mean, there was some, but I just, maybe for like an early 2000s, but I think if you
00:12:21.420
look at the last like 100 years, I think most women on the covers were just objectively beautiful.
00:12:31.820
I mean, as a Ford model, the girls who were in straight size modeling, they were size four.
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And that's because the samples are made in a size four.
00:13:14.560
I would say that that average that she just quoted would be over 12 stone.
00:13:20.140
Because I would think that average is between eight to 12.
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I think if you're in a good in-shape 12, there's good in-shape 12 women.
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Anything above that, then we're talking obesity.
00:13:36.540
I think like around 10 years ago, it used to be way different.
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And they would already say, oh, you should try to lose weight, you know, for your height,
00:14:04.120
Now, if you look at that, they're like, yeah, you're perfect.
00:14:08.220
So it really changed in the last decade, I would say.
00:14:12.660
So it was about around 10 years ago, was there plus size models?
00:14:18.620
There definitely were on America's Next Top Model.
00:14:21.060
I mean, it wasn't that as common though, but I definitely, I used to watch Tyra Banks.
00:14:28.640
But they weren't like, they weren't like the super, yeah, like you see today, they were
00:14:44.260
Well, this is what I'm saying, for the modeling world, that's quite big, yeah?
00:14:46.680
But again, it's like when you go to an NBA game, I want to see good basketball players.
00:14:50.800
Like, it's supposed to be the epitome of beauty.
00:14:53.040
But now we're rewarding average, like, I don't want to see average chicks, like, faces on
00:15:01.200
But if she's a good, I'm not saying plus, plus, but if she's a good size 12 with good curves
00:15:07.680
We don't really want to just see slim girls all the time.
00:15:13.100
Yeah, but it's typically, to be honest, it's typically broke men.
00:15:22.480
But it's like, when you see rich men, what do they have on their arms?
00:15:27.760
But the only reason why they have slim women is because the slim women are in the higher
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echelons of places where the other women, not in beauty, no, let's not talk about beauty
00:15:36.940
I'm talking about venues, certain venues, certain places that they get to go to.
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Leonardo DiCaprio, if he wanted a big chick, he couldn't find one.
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But I'm saying, in certain, the venue, the events, the events he goes to, though.
00:15:53.760
No, half these guys get their chicks from Instagram.
00:16:00.140
But do you think Leonardo's just got in in bear girls DMs, just hollering girls in the DMs?
00:16:05.000
I think if he wants it, I think he'll pick, like, he hollered at that one chick, the Hadid.
00:16:18.100
It's like, if you look at the richest, most successful men, they typically have slim women.
00:16:21.940
I'm saying, if you're looking at the richest parts of events and venues, Mayfair, whatever,
00:16:27.140
in America, Manhattan, whatever, if you go to the upper echelons of places, they've got to be,
00:16:33.020
Do you really think that the only reason they're with slim, beautiful women is because of the events
00:16:39.460
But I'm saying because of the environment that they're in, they're going to be-
00:16:43.020
I think that was because that is society's ideal of a beautiful woman.
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And so I feel like the plus model came in when people started complaining that there wasn't
00:16:52.980
But then why is it that all around the world, they like young, beautiful, slim women everywhere,
00:16:59.680
even in different societies with completely different cultures.
00:17:02.660
Please, please do not bring up this one fringent tribe in Africa.
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Everyone brings up, but it's like, it's such a small percentage of the world.
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They bring up some tribe in Africa that likes the fat women, but it's a very, very-
00:17:21.640
I hear that, but if you think about it, it's the motherland.
00:17:28.940
Okay, because you know, you know, deep down, you know that men like slim women in general.
00:17:37.020
And I'm going to say this coming from being a black man.
00:17:41.180
If I'm talking about being a black man, I'm from a black perspective of, I feel like
00:17:52.260
But you keep talking about celebrity men that are going to be around higher women that-
00:18:04.200
I'm telling you, they do not put fat chicks on their arms.
00:18:06.880
High-class society and celebrities want people with the option to not have a fat chick on their arm.
00:18:14.060
But even like I was having a conversation the other day with a woman, and she was a slim woman.
00:18:23.560
And she said when she was slim, she was only getting approached by white men.
00:18:29.040
No, not a lot of weight, but she's ticked, got body, whatever, blah, blah, blah.
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Now she's getting approached by a lot of black men.
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But I'm saying, if you look at it on the Democrats thing-
00:18:39.840
Which successful black men that we know are dating fat chicks?
00:18:43.400
Yeah, but are we only going to talk about successful men?
00:18:46.540
Broke men don't have as many options as rich men.
00:18:51.240
So if you look at the men with the most options, to look-
00:18:53.500
Okay, so if we want to see what women want, we got to look at the women with the most options.
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Who do the most beautiful, the youngest, most fertile women pick?
00:19:02.160
We have to look at the men with the most options.
00:19:03.780
Because it's not really fair to say, oh, I like fat chicks if I make, you know, $10 an hour at Taco Bell.
00:19:15.800
If you're talking about celebrities, celebrities are guided-
00:19:25.180
I grew up with 10 siblings in a 10-bedroom mansion in a community where many people made that amount of money.
00:19:31.100
So I've been around a successful, wealthy man, and they don't put fat chicks.
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Sometimes they do get fat later, but they don't appreciate that, you know what I mean?
00:19:39.980
So, yeah, but I hear what you're saying, but I'm saying the reason-
00:19:43.520
These men, obviously, are going to go for similar because they're around-
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You being in the top 1% and being in this neighborhood-
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It allows you to see different things, you get me?
00:19:54.860
Obviously, if you do have money, a lot of people with money are in the gym.
00:19:58.820
They do it because they have more time on their hands to do other things.
00:20:11.100
But also, I think the reason that a lot of women are slimmer and why do you think more successful men want women who are slimmer is because it's healthier for them.
00:20:19.940
Like, their risk for getting, you know, diseases at an older age, their risk for having pregnancy risks are much lower if they're not overweight.
00:20:28.540
So, why would a man choose a woman if he wants to marry them if they're going to die at 50, if they're going to die at 70, if their children are going to be at risk for birth risk?
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Like, when men are looking for wives, they're not looking for women who are going to have risks.
00:20:47.800
And we even saw, for you, how your bad habit passed on to her.
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And that's like, if you have a bad habit yourself, you will pass it on to your kids, and then it's another problem that your kids-
00:20:58.180
My mom used to feed me, like, Pop-Tarts and stuff when I was a kid.
00:21:00.800
And my mom was pretty big, and then she ended up, like, losing all the weight.
00:21:04.720
And she told me, like, she literally did it for my dad.
00:21:08.140
And, yeah, I have a sugar addiction to this day.
00:21:12.280
So, it's like, bad habits pass from, like, the parents to the kids.
00:21:21.020
They make healthy Pop-Tarts, but they're really not healthy.
00:21:27.600
I went in the complete opposite direction, like total neurosis.
00:21:30.760
I got my bachelor's and master's degree in nutrition.
00:21:33.080
I helped thousands of people lose weight, regain their health.
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So, her choice to gain autonomy through overeating and ill health was almost, you know, well, it was just so crazy for me because I was still healthy.
00:21:54.260
My whole life, until I was, like, 15, I was, like, rebelling against her.
00:21:58.380
I was, like, I'm going to eat all the junk food.
00:22:00.520
So, I'd go to my friend's house and I'd stuff my face with pizza.
00:22:02.820
And then their moms would call her and be, like, oh, my gosh, is your daughter okay?
00:22:06.840
She's eaten, like, a box of pizza and, like, my whole box of goldfish.
00:22:12.060
And then I'd come home and I would never like her cooking, even though she's the best cook I know.
00:22:15.960
But, like, I would, I just rebelled my whole life.
00:22:20.040
James says, there's a difference between fit and thick.
00:22:25.100
Puffy, I'm in Las Vegas and I see plenty of women from Africa.
00:22:39.200
These plus-size influencers are lying to people.
00:22:46.960
But, basically, Lizzo is portraying something that is terrible for young women.
00:22:51.960
And then you have thousands of young women saying, oh, my gosh, Lizzo is so beautiful.
00:22:57.280
And then you have all the fat people looking at Lizzo, feeding off of her positivity, her body positivity.
00:23:11.120
Nobody really spoke about her weight because she didn't lead with it.
00:23:13.720
You know, they did speak about it when she lost the weight.
00:23:16.280
They were like, oh, we can't believe you lost the weight.
00:23:24.340
Why aren't more people supporting women losing weight?
00:23:35.200
It benefits the food industry and the medical industry to have more overweight people.
00:23:39.860
Then you have more medications being handed out.
00:23:41.800
Then you have more depression, anxiety, suicide.
00:23:47.600
No, I mean, honestly, like, one time I was at work.
00:23:50.820
And these guys were, like, clowning on women over 200 pounds.
00:24:00.140
And literally, I ended up, like, losing a bunch of weight.
00:24:05.080
And then it was the best thing that ever happened to me.
00:24:23.740
And, you know, if you don't start now, you are going to die very, like, slowly but soon.
00:24:37.660
They weren't like, you're going to die tomorrow.
00:24:48.600
But they definitely have a higher risk of cardiovascular disease, which is a number one killer.
00:24:55.220
They definitely will develop diabetes type 2 and other diseases that are 100% preventable.
00:24:59.500
There was that influencer that just, like, dropped dead the other day because she was obese.
00:25:03.540
And, like, she would literally always be eating and doing mukbangs.
00:25:08.200
And then they say, like, when obese people go to the doctor and they say to lose weight, that they're, like, not listening to them.
00:25:17.400
But I'm like, well, I mean, I'm not a doctor, but you might want to, like, watch for your head.
00:25:22.420
But even doctors are lying to people now saying, oh, it's okay to eat, like, cheeseburger.
00:25:29.220
And it's like, you guys, why are you lying to these people who actually, some people who actually want to be helped are being lied to.
00:25:40.780
Doctors aren't really even trained in nutrition.
00:25:44.960
And the business model isn't set up for them to support their patients.
00:25:51.940
And we really need to get smart and get responsible and be clear about what we're putting in our thoughts, in our minds, and in our mouths.
00:26:01.540
They said, as an African woman, Zimbabwean, we are curvy.
00:26:05.160
There is a big difference between being curvy and overweight.
00:26:12.900
And then there is another one that was from interracial marriages or relationships.
00:26:17.920
For a black men community, we value bigger women because they make for better sex partners.
00:26:27.500
My thin woman felt like she was too pretty to fulfill my sexual requirements.
00:26:36.300
So how did you say, how does a man identify a good woman?
00:26:40.100
I would say that a man identifies a good woman if she's one, healthy and fit.
00:26:46.640
And I'd say number two, if she has traditional values, if she believes in being submissive, if she believes in being feminine, she loves to be.
00:27:06.340
And then I think if she wants to cook, if she's okay cleaning, she's a homemaker, she would love to, you know, have children and take care of them and be a housewife.
00:27:15.900
And so that's what I think identifies a good woman.
00:27:20.920
Well, identifying as a good woman nowadays is a bit difficult.
00:27:25.440
However, I would emphasize on the values and the morals of the woman.
00:27:32.500
Primarily, her ability to be a good wife, her ability to raise good children and even her thoughts and the things she has in mind, because she's going to be molding the next generation.
00:27:47.380
Because, you know, women lie, like we can just say things like I'm.
00:27:50.980
But, you know, if you have a deep conversation with a person.
00:27:58.720
But believe me, throughout time, you can identify.
00:28:06.280
If it's, I would say, I would give it like three months, but it can't.
00:28:17.720
So you think in three months, he can see if she has traditional values.
00:28:32.520
So ask her to do something and see what she does.
00:28:35.460
For example, you can tell, I mean, if a man tells to a woman, can you please make me a coffee or a meal?
00:28:40.580
And she'd say, hell no, I'm not doing this to you.
00:28:43.500
If she's here for three months, ask her to make him a coffee.
00:28:58.520
How does he, does he, like, what else, what else does he do?
00:29:12.640
It's his ability to identify what he values in a woman.
00:29:17.080
I mean, that's going to be subjective to an extent.
00:29:20.480
So I'm asking, like, what makes someone a good woman and how does he identify that?
00:29:25.080
I think what you were saying as well, men do test women.
00:29:27.580
I've been tested by men, like, with certain things.
00:29:42.560
And then he will know, do you know how to cook?
00:29:50.140
You're dropping the gravy on the side of the place.
00:29:51.820
So I'm just, I want to get it step by step further.
00:29:54.460
Where I'm going to let the men talk, I'm just curious how it's going to align with
00:29:57.420
what you guys say, from the women than the men.
00:29:59.960
Okay, so first he's going to see her for three months.
00:30:08.680
I think that, honestly, if it's a high-value man, most of the time he's going to know without
00:30:20.860
There is this, I don't know if it's the right word, but there is this aura.
00:30:25.960
There is this sense when you sit with a woman who you know is going to be respectful to
00:30:40.200
But average men nowadays look at high-value men's content more and more and more and try
00:30:47.380
So you think, I'm just curious, you think men just know?
00:30:52.220
They don't just know, but they should get to a point to just know.
00:30:57.620
So how does he get to that point that he just knows?
00:31:01.840
Well, slowly, slowly, slowly, we're getting to a point where I think they need to go to
00:31:08.920
And certain parts of the world, they will just know that 90% of the women will not be
00:31:17.920
He needs to travel somewhere else and then experience those women and then compare them
00:31:23.500
Okay, but for a guy that doesn't travel, like he stays in the West, because most, remember,
00:31:29.060
Like, I think half of U.S. men don't have passports.
00:31:35.620
So for a guy that's not traveling, how does he know a good woman versus bad woman?
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If the first conversation with her is like, oh, so where are we going to dinner?
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I think when you meet a girl, you should take her for coffee and that's it.
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I don't know if she wants to continue the date and get you to buy her dinner and...
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Can a man know a good woman from a bad woman without experiencing a lot of women?
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I would suggest that in his 20s, he dates as many women as he can.
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Date as many women as possible to tell the difference.
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Because, again, remember, I just want to remind everybody of the stats.
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38% of women or of kids are born into single-parent homes, meaning 38% of the next generation has never seen a functioning marriage.
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Average child, first child, is before the average age of first marriage.
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Average number of partners for a woman is between four and eight.
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And that's self-reported, so, you know, take that with a grain of salt.
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But women have a 20% chance of being in a happy marriage if they have slept with more than five people.
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And if men get divorced, they can be financially ruined and their kids can be taken from them.
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So, basically, there's a lot riding on them picking the right woman.
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As many of you know, I was just banned on TikTok.
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And we are demonetized on a daily basis on this platform.
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