JustPearlyThings - April 26, 2023


Pearl Made This Confession On The Show

Topics
neurodivergence and criminal records poverty background in dating
Hosted by
Hannah Pearl Davis
The Reason Men and Women CAN'T BE Friends Man REVEALS The Truth Behind the Woke Agenda

Episode Stats


Length

10 minutes

Words per minute

193.5

Word count

1,955

Sentence count

211

Harmful content

Misogyny

7

sentences flagged

Toxicity

9

sentences flagged

Hate speech

7

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, we talk about how to deal with the pressures of growing up in poverty and what it takes to become a successful criminal. We also talk about whether or not we should judge someone based on their criminal record.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.000 You guys were asking if I would want my sister to date someone with a criminal record. 1.00
00:00:04.580 I think that's how we got into this.
00:00:06.260 And I'm going to stand on that.
00:00:08.620 I would say don't date the guy with the criminal record.
00:00:11.900 Don't date the guy with kids.
00:00:13.940 Well, it started with the kids.
00:00:15.220 And then he said that's like judging someone on their criminal record.
00:00:17.820 And I said I would, in fact, judge someone on their criminal record.
00:00:20.940 I would say I would judge people based on their choices that they make.
00:00:25.500 I think that's a fair statement.
00:00:27.380 But some people are born into situations where they're at an advantage to make better choices.
00:00:34.480 Yeah, but you said ADHD before and trauma.
00:00:37.720 Like, you have it, yes.
00:00:39.520 But that does not mean that you should stay in it.
00:00:42.840 When you're neurodivergent, your brain literally sends you different signals to make different decisions.
00:00:49.100 It's a big factor.
00:00:51.160 A big factor.
00:00:52.240 Doesn't change your goals and dreams of what you want to become.
00:00:54.320 Yeah, but a lot of people get into crime really young.
00:00:57.820 Yeah, it changes the way that you react to certain situations, how you deal with, how you process information.
00:01:05.020 It's a big factor.
00:01:06.340 I really think that's just an excuse.
00:01:07.960 It's not an excuse.
00:01:08.860 I think it's an excuse.
00:01:10.180 It's a real thing.
00:01:10.860 Yeah, I mean, I have ADHD.
00:01:12.400 Yeah, so do I.
00:01:13.000 I think that's too deep to be honest.
00:01:16.560 I committed no crimes.
00:01:18.260 No crimes.
00:01:19.380 No crimes.
00:01:19.980 But we're not, for example, we are not black males born in, well, I didn't have loads of money, but not proper poverty probably.
00:01:28.380 And not with the same pressure and not with the same, for example, in London, people born in poverty live next to people who have so much money.
00:01:36.440 Social media shows people so much money.
00:01:38.660 I have to.
00:01:38.800 Have you ever seen real poverty?
00:01:41.080 Yeah, I have.
00:01:41.720 I do a lot of volunteer.
00:01:42.320 I've done a lot of volunteering in developing countries.
00:01:44.660 100%.
00:01:45.540 Yeah, so I just think, like, poverty here isn't really real poverty.
00:01:49.880 Nope, nope, nope, nope.
00:01:50.620 I went to India one time.
00:01:53.400 That's real poverty.
00:01:54.600 Yep.
00:01:55.000 I have never seen more homeless people in one.
00:01:57.160 Hungry.
00:01:57.940 Yeah, and it was, like, during this, like, super hot summer.
00:02:01.200 Like, people were dying on the street.
00:02:02.280 It was really sad.
00:02:03.220 It's not nice.
00:02:03.980 It's not just about poverty, though.
00:02:05.400 It's about the insecurities and what they've been through.
00:02:08.240 And probably also, some of them are, obviously, we're not saying everyone born into crime is black, but some of them are.
00:02:16.580 And they experience racism as well.
00:02:18.080 They have a lot to prove.
00:02:19.160 Like, it's very hard as a teenage boy to feel that you're in poverty.
00:02:24.720 You don't have...
00:02:26.160 Lack of opportunity.
00:02:27.500 Yeah, you don't feel secure.
00:02:28.580 You're targeted more.
00:02:29.000 And you're trying to prove yourself.
00:02:30.520 And it's very hard as a teenager not to try and be cool.
00:02:32.760 And, unfortunately, in London now, to be cool and to be worthy and to feel good, you're a bad boy.
00:02:40.800 And girls also... 0.99
00:02:41.720 Women, actually, are a problem in this. 1.00
00:02:44.240 Because teenage girls go for that. 1.00
00:02:46.200 And that actually encourages them so much more.
00:02:48.480 Perception.
00:02:48.980 So, what does it take from a successful man who was in poverty to become successful?
00:02:55.380 I think there's probably different factors.
00:03:00.180 They went through the trauma.
00:03:01.120 They went through this.
00:03:01.780 They went through that.
00:03:02.540 Everybody's different.
00:03:04.100 Some people do have a stronger mindset than others.
00:03:07.640 And that's okay.
00:03:08.420 But it's also possible for anybody.
00:03:10.280 That's just my opinion.
00:03:11.660 There are many possibilities for everybody.
00:03:14.760 Like, you can do whatever you put your mind to.
00:03:17.080 But there are some situations where life, in general, is heavy.
00:03:21.780 And they don't have the brain capacity to even think about next week.
00:03:26.920 Let alone next day. 1.00
00:03:28.060 You think they're too dumb? 1.00
00:03:29.240 No. 1.00
00:03:29.900 I'm talking about, like...
00:03:30.720 You said brain capacity.
00:03:31.880 Yeah.
00:03:32.300 In regards to dealing with everyday life.
00:03:35.860 Dealing with pressure.
00:03:35.880 Pressure, yeah.
00:03:38.400 Like, work stress, family stress, struggle stress, money stress.
00:03:41.980 There's actual people who came out of that, though.
00:03:44.220 That's what I'm saying.
00:03:44.800 But you don't know what those people have had different.
00:03:47.980 Like, what if you're more rebellious because you don't have attachments to your parents
00:03:51.600 where someone else has a better attachment?
00:03:53.140 I know people in the same exact family where one grew up to be a multimillionaire
00:03:56.960 and one grew up to be an alcoholic.
00:03:58.480 It's choices.
00:03:59.640 Like, I'm just not with this excuse, that excuse, that excuse.
00:04:02.940 I know people in countries that have real poverty, that have real, like, no options.
00:04:08.400 And so it's like, you know how spoiled we sound in the West to say,
00:04:11.160 oh, my ADHD, oh, this, oh, that.
00:04:13.060 But you really know what you know as well, right?
00:04:15.380 Yeah, exactly.
00:04:16.160 India, wherever, you know, whichever country you were given that example,
00:04:20.520 that is what they know.
00:04:21.820 We don't know that.
00:04:22.420 That's true.
00:04:22.580 So we can't, we only know what we know.
00:04:24.280 You can't compare that.
00:04:25.280 Okay, I can tell you, I grew up with, like, nannies from around the world.
00:04:28.340 So, like, we had a different nanny from, like, a different country every year.
00:04:30.960 So I've spoken to people from literally, like, I grew up with them all over the world.
00:04:34.200 And I'm telling you, like, we sound so spoiled to them.
00:04:38.260 I agree with you to expect, because I've also seen poverty like that.
00:04:43.380 But unless we take all of our children and teenagers to developing countries and show them, 0.88
00:04:48.300 they, like you said, they only know, they're only in that bubble.
00:04:50.600 Also, if you're fortunate to have a nanny, there's certain lifestyles that you can't even comprehend,
00:04:57.220 because there are certain people that can't even afford to eat.
00:05:00.200 I can't comprehend.
00:05:02.840 This is the whole, oh, you're rich, you know, therefore, choices.
00:05:06.760 It still goes back to, you can still be born into anything, and your choices, it still matters.
00:05:12.200 And it's who you are.
00:05:13.820 So I don't really know, like, what we're arguing here.
00:05:16.400 Like, you should be given a pass, because you grew up in a bad situation.
00:05:19.900 No, I just feel like, sorry, I just feel like we're going off topic a little bit, yeah?
00:05:25.820 Because we're talking about people's lifestyles and people's backgrounds.
00:05:29.200 That doesn't define you as a person.
00:05:31.760 And for me, these experiences make, you know...
00:05:35.420 They can build character.
00:05:36.180 It builds character, builds you from nothing to something.
00:05:40.860 And if you're going to shut the door on potentially the love of your life or somebody that's good for you,
00:05:46.360 just because of what he'd done yesterday or before he met you,
00:05:49.500 then you're living in a delusional world.
00:05:51.260 But it is relevant as well, because you only know what you know.
00:05:54.280 And depending on how you've been brought up and where you're from,
00:05:57.140 the people that you've been around, where your parents are, your family are,
00:06:01.460 the way is relevant, because you only know what you know.
00:06:03.900 I think it's actually really smart to look at people's background when dating them.
00:06:08.340 It is, in certain aspects.
00:06:09.600 It is, it is.
00:06:10.400 I'm not saying you can't overcome bad choices.
00:06:13.040 Some people do, but I still do think that if a guy has a criminal background,
00:06:18.560 you should maybe choose a guy that doesn't.
00:06:20.700 Be more precautious, for sure.
00:06:22.340 You know?
00:06:22.940 I think it depends on what criminal background they have, though,
00:06:25.580 because it can't be...
00:06:26.800 You can't look at us, oh, he's got a criminal record.
00:06:29.260 He is, you know, he's a bad guy.
00:06:31.740 It depends on what it is and what scale, in a way.
00:06:34.380 Honestly, all of this really goes back to the women. 0.96
00:06:37.260 I gotta be honest, guys.
00:06:39.220 I gotta be honest.
00:06:40.080 She's on him, she's on him.
00:06:41.020 Because it's like with these guys, these guys or girls or whatever,
00:06:45.480 come from these bad backgrounds, right?
00:06:47.400 But why do they come from these bad backgrounds?
00:06:50.540 Well, the women destroyed the home, most of them. 1.00
00:06:54.880 Yeah, yeah.
00:06:55.360 The women either chose to have children with men that weren't fathers, 0.99
00:07:00.560 nor wanted to be fathers,
00:07:02.320 or they chose to leave their husband or their boyfriend, whatever it is,
00:07:09.640 and then we're going back to the kids suffering, right?
00:07:13.880 And now they're in this traumatic situation
00:07:16.480 with, like, where they maybe make bad decisions.
00:07:21.080 So, really, this is like full circle, guys.
00:07:24.200 It is a vicious cycle.
00:07:25.680 Can I just ask you, because you said it's better to have children young,
00:07:28.980 but actually you're more likely to make mistakes at that age
00:07:31.320 and have children with the wrong person,
00:07:32.580 and then you exacerbate that cycle.
00:07:35.040 What do you mean you're more likely to make mistakes?
00:07:38.240 Because you're younger, you're not as well-informed.
00:07:41.400 You're not as experienced.
00:07:42.620 I want to make sure I'm picking the right person.
00:07:45.500 That's why some people I've dated in the past,
00:07:47.380 I would not have a child with them.
00:07:49.520 I think that you really just, you'll never know for sure.
00:07:54.700 I think, like, because what are you going to find out?
00:07:57.380 Like, you're never really going to know until you get married
00:08:00.200 or until you live with someone.
00:08:01.640 So, it's like, I feel like women, like, we operate in fear.
00:08:04.180 Like, oh, we could find someone better.
00:08:06.460 Oh, something could go wrong.
00:08:07.660 Where it's like, you just pick someone and make it work.
00:08:11.640 You know what?
00:08:11.820 I say you pick someone and make it work.
00:08:13.280 This is something I always say.
00:08:14.540 I think currently we know too much when it comes to life, society,
00:08:20.320 and choices.
00:08:21.980 And because of that, every time we're trying to make a decision,
00:08:26.320 we always have excuses.
00:08:29.840 Every single time.
00:08:30.960 The thing is, though, it's facts that some people are born
00:08:33.900 into harder circumstances than others.
00:08:35.600 So, how is that an excuse?
00:08:38.500 Yeah, but that's why I always go back to our grandparents.
00:08:42.140 It's the mother's fault. 1.00
00:08:42.780 What made our grandparents and our parents and our great-grandparents
00:08:47.920 stay together?
00:08:49.200 What made them stay together?
00:08:50.380 Mom's amazing, by the way.
00:08:51.480 Knowing that they probably went through the same traumas,
00:08:53.620 same experiences, same everything.
00:08:55.820 They probably had it worse, honestly.
00:08:57.220 They probably had it worse.
00:08:57.880 They probably had it worse than us.
00:08:58.660 But what made them stay together versus our mindset now?
00:09:00.340 But that's why we have things like intergenerational trauma.
00:09:03.720 Intergenerational trauma is trauma passed down
00:09:05.480 because people in the past didn't have access to mental health.
00:09:08.160 They didn't understand it.
00:09:08.920 They weren't aware.
00:09:09.420 Okay, well, don't you think people all had generational trauma? 0.99
00:09:11.540 They lived through, like, famines and shit. 0.99
00:09:13.360 Yeah, a lot of people did. 1.00
00:09:15.720 Back in the day, they were told to shut up and sit down
00:09:18.420 and get on with it.
00:09:19.180 But that's why there's a lot of trauma now.
00:09:20.740 But not everybody's born.
00:09:22.160 Who was told to shut up and get on with it?
00:09:23.040 In, like...
00:09:24.280 The women? 0.95
00:09:25.360 I think the world might be better if we did.
00:09:28.300 No, but, you know...
00:09:28.980 Back in the day, like, for both men and women,
00:09:31.180 you wouldn't necessarily express...
00:09:32.580 Especially men.
00:09:33.320 I mean, men have got... 0.56
00:09:33.960 That's a whole other topic.
00:09:35.360 Men have got it extremely hard.
00:09:38.980 But it's only more recent days that...
00:09:41.540 It's, you know, mental health and access to treatment and stuff
00:09:45.740 has come to light, like, over the last, like, kind of, what, five years?
00:09:50.200 As many of you know, I was just banned on TikTok.
00:09:53.640 And we are demonetized on a daily basis on this platform.
00:09:57.920 If you want to help, please consider sending a super thanks below.
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