Pearl Made This Confession On The Show
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
193.50049
Summary
In this episode, we talk about how to deal with the pressures of growing up in poverty and what it takes to become a successful criminal. We also talk about whether or not we should judge someone based on their criminal record.
Transcript
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You guys were asking if I would want my sister to date someone with a criminal record.
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I would say don't date the guy with the criminal record.
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And then he said that's like judging someone on their criminal record.
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And I said I would, in fact, judge someone on their criminal record.
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I would say I would judge people based on their choices that they make.
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But some people are born into situations where they're at an advantage to make better choices.
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But that does not mean that you should stay in it.
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When you're neurodivergent, your brain literally sends you different signals to make different decisions.
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Doesn't change your goals and dreams of what you want to become.
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Yeah, but a lot of people get into crime really young.
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Yeah, it changes the way that you react to certain situations, how you deal with, how you process information.
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But we're not, for example, we are not black males born in, well, I didn't have loads of money, but not proper poverty probably.
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And not with the same pressure and not with the same, for example, in London, people born in poverty live next to people who have so much money.
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I've done a lot of volunteering in developing countries.
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Yeah, so I just think, like, poverty here isn't really real poverty.
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Yeah, and it was, like, during this, like, super hot summer.
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It's about the insecurities and what they've been through.
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And probably also, some of them are, obviously, we're not saying everyone born into crime is black, but some of them are.
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Like, it's very hard as a teenage boy to feel that you're in poverty.
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And it's very hard as a teenager not to try and be cool.
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And, unfortunately, in London now, to be cool and to be worthy and to feel good, you're a bad boy.
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And that actually encourages them so much more.
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So, what does it take from a successful man who was in poverty to become successful?
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Some people do have a stronger mindset than others.
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Like, you can do whatever you put your mind to.
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But there are some situations where life, in general, is heavy.
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And they don't have the brain capacity to even think about next week.
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Like, work stress, family stress, struggle stress, money stress.
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There's actual people who came out of that, though.
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But you don't know what those people have had different.
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Like, what if you're more rebellious because you don't have attachments to your parents
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I know people in the same exact family where one grew up to be a multimillionaire
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Like, I'm just not with this excuse, that excuse, that excuse.
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I know people in countries that have real poverty, that have real, like, no options.
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And so it's like, you know how spoiled we sound in the West to say,
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But you really know what you know as well, right?
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India, wherever, you know, whichever country you were given that example,
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Okay, I can tell you, I grew up with, like, nannies from around the world.
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So, like, we had a different nanny from, like, a different country every year.
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So I've spoken to people from literally, like, I grew up with them all over the world.
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And I'm telling you, like, we sound so spoiled to them.
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I agree with you to expect, because I've also seen poverty like that.
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But unless we take all of our children and teenagers to developing countries and show them,
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they, like you said, they only know, they're only in that bubble.
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Also, if you're fortunate to have a nanny, there's certain lifestyles that you can't even comprehend,
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because there are certain people that can't even afford to eat.
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This is the whole, oh, you're rich, you know, therefore, choices.
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It still goes back to, you can still be born into anything, and your choices, it still matters.
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So I don't really know, like, what we're arguing here.
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Like, you should be given a pass, because you grew up in a bad situation.
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No, I just feel like, sorry, I just feel like we're going off topic a little bit, yeah?
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Because we're talking about people's lifestyles and people's backgrounds.
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And for me, these experiences make, you know...
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It builds character, builds you from nothing to something.
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And if you're going to shut the door on potentially the love of your life or somebody that's good for you,
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just because of what he'd done yesterday or before he met you,
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But it is relevant as well, because you only know what you know.
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And depending on how you've been brought up and where you're from,
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the people that you've been around, where your parents are, your family are,
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the way is relevant, because you only know what you know.
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I think it's actually really smart to look at people's background when dating them.
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Some people do, but I still do think that if a guy has a criminal background,
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I think it depends on what criminal background they have, though,
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You can't look at us, oh, he's got a criminal record.
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It depends on what it is and what scale, in a way.
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Honestly, all of this really goes back to the women.
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Because it's like with these guys, these guys or girls or whatever,
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But why do they come from these bad backgrounds?
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Well, the women destroyed the home, most of them.
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The women either chose to have children with men that weren't fathers,
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or they chose to leave their husband or their boyfriend, whatever it is,
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and then we're going back to the kids suffering, right?
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with, like, where they maybe make bad decisions.
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Can I just ask you, because you said it's better to have children young,
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but actually you're more likely to make mistakes at that age
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What do you mean you're more likely to make mistakes?
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Because you're younger, you're not as well-informed.
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I want to make sure I'm picking the right person.
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I think that you really just, you'll never know for sure.
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I think, like, because what are you going to find out?
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Like, you're never really going to know until you get married
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So, it's like, I feel like women, like, we operate in fear.
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Where it's like, you just pick someone and make it work.
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I think currently we know too much when it comes to life, society,
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And because of that, every time we're trying to make a decision,
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The thing is, though, it's facts that some people are born
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Yeah, but that's why I always go back to our grandparents.
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What made our grandparents and our parents and our great-grandparents
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Knowing that they probably went through the same traumas,
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But what made them stay together versus our mindset now?
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But that's why we have things like intergenerational trauma.
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because people in the past didn't have access to mental health.
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Okay, well, don't you think people all had generational trauma?
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Back in the day, they were told to shut up and sit down
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It's, you know, mental health and access to treatment and stuff
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has come to light, like, over the last, like, kind of, what, five years?
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As many of you know, I was just banned on TikTok.
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And we are demonetized on a daily basis on this platform.
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