JustPearlyThings - Pearl Tried To Reason With this Modern Woman

00:00:00.000 what the worst thing for children is to not have a mom and a dad in a house i agree with what

00:00:04.560 um i forgot your name what you're saying pierre and what pearl saying it's the worst thing and

00:00:09.160 i feel like if you didn't want to have kids of that person then you should have been more careful

00:00:13.980 but you need to think about the children because their childhood really shapes the way they are

00:00:19.620 especially like not having a dad and i feel like you just need to firm some things and happiness

00:00:24.200 it comes and goes can i ask you a question would you rather your mom and dad were together but 0.98

00:00:29.960 you watch your dad treat your mom like like crap i would rather my mom and dad be together but 0.97

00:00:34.780 like some people have suggested different ways of going about things rather than 0.98

00:00:38.840 like someone running away like but with that with the ideology of like cohabitation and like just

00:00:45.160 living together and being unhappy and like sleeping in separate beds and like just putting on a front

00:00:49.440 for the whole family like he said the ideology of like kids like being like a sponge they absorb like

00:00:54.380 what's going on around them they are they're not stupid they are seeing what's happening your parents

00:00:58.360 are sleeping in separate beds that literally as they grow up that like tells them like oh that

00:01:02.720 like like stops them from being intimate with partners later in life because they don't see

00:01:06.320 this intimacy between their parents the two people that are learning from and living with and stuff

00:01:11.000 and they're seeing like this unhappiness that whether it's a front or not like they are

00:01:14.460 like seeing that your mom and your dad like aren't happy together so how is this like how is that

00:01:19.140 better for the kids what's what's the better better alternative they're there wait wait wait wait they're in

00:01:24.560 separate they're in separate houses and then they get to meet their girlfriends and boyfriends over

00:01:28.580 the years no i don't you should meet their other partners but i think you should be able to see

00:01:32.460 your parents happy i think you should see your parents respecting their own boundaries and it teaches

00:01:36.520 individualism rather than dependency and quite frankly that is also society now marriage and family isn't about

00:01:42.300 individualism and that's my whole point it's a me me me culture but you said yourself you said that this is a post-marriage

00:01:48.620 society so why should we be trying to backtrack on society like this is the way society is growing

00:01:53.520 like we just have to accept and move on but is it for the better though i think i think it's regardless

00:01:58.620 of whether it's for the better of society it's better for the individual like all you should really care about

00:02:03.300 is your self-worth and your self-happiness but i don't i think marriage as an institution is dead i still think

00:02:08.080 there will be families but i i think um yeah as legally as an institution i think it's dead but how would you feel

00:02:14.860 if you saw your your daughter or your son in a relationship but they weren't happy in you wouldn't

00:02:19.000 say to them because i mean i would i would rather see if i if i had a daughter let's say was that was with a guy

00:02:24.980 i didn't like yeah i probably would have warned her not to have a kid with him i'd like to say

00:02:28.980 i probably would have she were women right we do it anyway so so she has a kid with him i warned you 1.00

00:02:36.120 not to do it now you made your bed like i i would just say lie in it lie in it until he's 18

00:02:41.480 you lose so much value for yourself though when you're with someone that you know isn't good for

00:02:50.180 you or you know it isn't i don't know what like you lose value for yourself like i don't really

00:02:54.340 get that but i'm like a punishment i'm saying yeah yeah and i'm saying it's a it's a you're it's a

00:02:59.240 punishment you chose poorly but i'm a big right but i'm saying i'm saying be accountable for what you

00:03:05.040 chose you picked it you made that you made that choice and half the wait wait wait and half the half

00:03:11.160 wait and half the time women pick men they know would not be good fathers i get it i get the 0.53

00:03:19.220 value system and i i kind of get where you're coming from like respect the institution family

00:03:24.140 first i don't get that but like so what if and i suppose this also goes to the cohabiting thing

00:03:29.900 because i get it like you're still trying to make it work even though you're not sleeping together

00:03:33.360 like you're there's a separation but there's this idea that we're still here like you you can be

00:03:39.000 friends for the kids yeah so but what happens if you can see that and i'm not trying to trap you up

00:03:46.060 i'm genuinely asking like if you can see this situation you together even cohabiting cohabitating

00:03:52.040 you get along so poorly even when trying that you can see it's making the children unhappy

00:03:58.200 at that point then i would say yeah you gotta separate but at least try at least try i give will

00:04:04.360 a divorce those kids are happy bro like i've seen it i've seen it i've seen family members literally

00:04:13.520 live together for like five years and they weren't together together but they just lived in the same

00:04:19.160 house and they slept in separate rooms and i thought as even as a child like why why are they still

00:04:24.500 together but it showed like after a while for me personally it just showed strength yeah and then

00:04:30.980 after the the situation and that period where they whatever was going on between them i think it

00:04:37.480 lasted like five years maybe even longer but they ended up coming back together afterwards and for me

00:04:42.620 actually witnessing that was a beautiful thing can i can go ahead i just want to put a total spin on it

00:04:48.720 something that's sort of related but unrelated what about i'll say girls women however you want to

00:04:55.140 describe them the ones that get pregnant on purpose to keep the man that i baby yeah so i i i've been

00:05:04.220 waiting to try and get my voice heard here it does happen i know women that have done it i know men

00:05:11.400 that have done it of course yeah but but how does a man do it how does a man do it purposely coming

00:05:20.100 inside a girl yeah to get her pregnant so that she'll stay with her oh yeah but a woman can still get 1.00

00:05:26.940 rid of it the man doesn't have a choice yeah but the man can pressure them into keeping it but you still

00:05:30.600 don't have to yeah but you know men influence women no but no but you literally right but you still

00:05:38.400 literally don't have to guys let her let her finish you don't have to i knew this was a lot of

00:05:45.260 discussion so yeah so this is this is a big thing and um women will do it on purpose it doesn't matter 1.00

00:05:54.700 what age you are what background they think that's the way to keep a man to retain a relationship to

00:06:00.700 perhaps even force a man into marriage for some years that may not even last and where you were

00:06:06.300 talking about the parents staying together if that's what happens then man feels they've got

00:06:12.980 no other choice but to okay i've got married this girl she's pregnant how long is that going to last

00:06:18.080 because they're then forced into the situation they actually don't want to live together but then

00:06:23.860 they understand the responsibility of co-parenting you know if the woman has done that and the and their

00:06:32.400 father has tried and they said right i'm going to marry you or i'm going to move in with you we're 0.52

00:06:35.920 having a child together i don't like what you've done you know you forced me into it but i'm going

00:06:39.840 to try that's that's that's an exception i'd say yeah it's a good question though they're forced into

00:06:49.580 living it living with each other for the sake of the children where you said the children have to

00:06:55.000 stay together that's was he dating her first was he like dating her was it a situation there was um

00:07:03.080 one of i say one of the gyms that i used to go to um the the girl got pregnant on for purpose 0.99

00:07:12.040 thinking that would enhance a relationship force them into marriage and being able to keep the

00:07:18.180 relationship she was like dating her yeah they were dating they were dating and um they split up

00:07:24.020 and all i can say is you know there are exceptions uh the most amazing father ever he took up his

00:07:30.000 responsibilities he absolutely adores his son but he was forced into that situation but all that did

00:07:36.380 is you know they end up breaking up did they did they get married and then separate or just like

00:07:41.140 they just agreed that they couldn't make it work that they weren't interested in each other they just

00:07:44.860 decided to raise his child but like separately they were raising the child separately she forced 0.95

00:07:50.660 him into situation to try and retain the relationship yeah that's an exception i think i think the

00:07:56.100 main the main point here is like taking accountability of your purposeful actions so what

00:08:01.180 happened to the relationship like what happened to the relationship after like she like basically

00:08:05.500 baby trapped him like it broke down yeah it broke down and then did they did they try to did they

00:08:12.220 decide to like force themselves to live together and no none exactly no no none of that she forced

00:08:18.580 the situation she forced the situation which obviously he was not happy about yeah but despite the

00:08:25.340 situation and then breaking up he stepped up as the one of the most responsible amazing fathers that

00:08:32.660 you could ever meet whilst living separately though yeah yes okay most men most men would though

00:08:36.820 like most like the majority of men yeah like we think logically right and we we go out to cover

00:08:44.120 the bases i want to make sure that my child can eat i want to make sure that my child has a roof over

00:08:48.060 there and i want to make sure that my child has an education the other comfort bits we may not all be

00:08:52.820 so good at that but i'll say that in no such situation is speaking to all women who are thinking of

00:08:58.960 doing this right now to trap a man that is the best way to terminate your relationship because

00:09:05.340 that guy right there he may have he may with patience he may have he may have loved you for

00:09:11.020 life right yeah but trapping a man is a is almost the most certain most surest way to create an enemy

00:09:17.120 of like that guy will hates hates hates her existence yeah but loves his child i'm saying so it's a thing

00:09:23.500 where like that's that's that's it's it's an unproductive strategy and it doesn't work because

00:09:30.320 it's not sustainable because you haven't built that foundation and all of a sudden you're in a

00:09:33.180 really high pressure situation where you're like oh my god i'm going to deal with the child

00:09:35.860 that's a horrible thing that's a horrible horrible thing do you know what it is as well that's that's i'm

00:09:41.740 really conflicted on that because i don't really like rewarding bad behavior but at the same time like

00:09:46.400 i think it's about the kids first i don't know because you know what it is men men are more

00:09:49.880 accountable for their actions so a man in that situation is going to think do you know what

00:09:53.320 i'm not in her so i gotta look after the kids you know what i mean like no one told me to do it i did

00:10:00.040 it as many of you know i was just banned on tiktok and we are demonetized on a daily basis on this

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JustPearlyThings - March 26, 2023

Pearl Tried To Reason With this Modern Woman

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