JustPearlyThings - May 01, 2023


Post Wall Woman Claims That She Is Traditional


Episode Stats


Length

12 minutes

Words per minute

205.3766

Word count

2,544

Sentence count

206

Harmful content

Misogyny

22

sentences flagged

Toxicity

19

sentences flagged

Hate speech

15

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode we talk about cheating and why men cheat and why women cheat. Cheating is a normal part of being in a relationship, but why do men cheat? Why do women cheat? What is the difference between cheating and an affair? What does it mean to cheat and what does cheating mean to a man?

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 I'll tell you, women and men cheating is two different things. 1.00
00:00:02.880 We've established that.
00:00:03.740 Yeah, but we both have egos, believe it or not.
00:00:05.340 I know we like to pretend that a woman is from Venus 1.00
00:00:07.920 and men are from Mars, but we're not that different.
00:00:10.520 We go toilet, we poo, we cry.
00:00:12.960 But that's a good book.
00:00:13.560 We're the same.
00:00:14.700 But men don't forget it.
00:00:15.640 I've got it, I've got it.
00:00:17.100 It's a good book, right?
00:00:18.080 It's a very good book.
00:00:19.280 It will make you understand the oxygen.
00:00:20.500 The reasons why we cheat are different, yeah,
00:00:22.340 between men and women, yeah?
00:00:23.940 For men, it's a physical thing, yeah?
00:00:25.640 A lot of the time, yeah?
00:00:27.160 That's why...
00:00:27.860 He wants to experience more, probably.
00:00:30.180 Yeah, I just, you know what?
00:00:31.400 Like I say, variety is the spice of life.
00:00:33.160 Yeah, but do that out of a relationship.
00:00:33.700 However, what I will say is, are you...
00:00:36.780 Is it just sort of like a one-off thing, or is it an affair?
00:00:40.340 Yeah, but...
00:00:40.660 Those are the two, you know what I mean?
00:00:41.640 Okay.
00:00:42.080 See, when you have an affair, that's when it's like...
00:00:44.520 That's different, right?
00:00:45.720 You know what I mean?
00:00:46.560 No, but some people would still class an affair 1.00
00:00:50.080 and cheat in as two of the same things.
00:00:52.260 No, they're not.
00:00:52.600 They're definitely, definitely not.
00:00:53.320 No, no, no, I said some.
00:00:54.400 I said some.
00:00:55.420 Don't come for me.
00:00:56.640 Okay, don't shoot the messenger.
00:00:57.860 I'm just saying for some.
00:00:59.320 Cheating, it hurts the person because, like I said,
00:01:05.100 I don't know what you're telling that individual
00:01:07.520 when you're laying and you're doing your pillow talk, yeah?
00:01:10.780 That's where a lot of people go wrong.
00:01:12.880 And this is what I'm saying.
00:01:14.060 If you know that you're not ready to give up your bachelor life, yeah?
00:01:19.680 And you're not ready to, like, submerge that ego and say,
00:01:22.820 you know what, cool, I've had my time running the streets.
00:01:26.060 Let me just kind of fix up and do what I've got to do.
00:01:28.760 When you're having, like, you know, like I said,
00:01:32.000 when you're at home and you're alone with that individual,
00:01:34.800 whether it's you talking to a woman or your woman talking to a man,
00:01:39.100 you not say certain things.
00:01:42.180 So it will hurt a woman as well as it will hurt a man, 0.99
00:01:46.100 especially if they believe, and this is where I come back to my point again,
00:01:51.160 you are being sold a dream.
00:01:53.920 Okay.
00:01:54.080 And you know full well, if you cannot commit to what you're telling me,
00:01:58.480 why tell me that?
00:01:59.560 Because you're comfortable.
00:02:00.860 Because we're in a situation where you're comfortable,
00:02:04.760 I know you, you know me.
00:02:06.160 Because it works.
00:02:06.980 Yeah, it works.
00:02:07.880 That's why you go to a job.
00:02:09.640 That's why women, you guys will say, oh, be honest to me,
00:02:12.900 but you pick the guys that sell you a dream,
00:02:14.680 so you don't pick the ones who are honest.
00:02:16.040 No, no, no, but you can still be honest,
00:02:19.420 but you have to understand, you can't say,
00:02:22.040 I'm not going to sit here and say, oh, I'm picking people that's selling me a dream.
00:02:26.360 No.
00:02:27.420 Can I add something?
00:02:28.700 I'm being me.
00:02:29.680 So if I'm coming to the table and I'm saying to you, look,
00:02:33.080 I really like you, we've gone out for a few dates,
00:02:35.920 you know, we've come to a point now where we're like, okay,
00:02:40.240 let's come together rather than just call in,
00:02:42.960 let's come together and do what we've got to do.
00:02:45.200 But I'm not going to, I'm not going to just say, oh, well,
00:02:49.860 you know, I should pick a different guy.
00:02:52.360 No, because I've been in that situation
00:02:53.760 and I've got friends that's been in that situation where the guy.
00:02:57.260 You don't think you should pick a different guy?
00:02:59.420 No, you can pick a different guy,
00:03:01.580 but that doesn't mean to say that you're picking a different guy.
00:03:04.920 Okay, you've got some women that like, you know, bad boys, 1.00
00:03:08.340 and then you've got women that like corporate men. 0.99
00:03:11.640 It's still, if it's in you to cheat, you're going to cheat.
00:03:14.780 But my point is not like a very small percentage of men can cheat.
00:03:20.280 So if you find yourself getting cheated on, cheated on, cheated on,
00:03:23.240 and you're the common denominator, it's like...
00:03:25.840 Well, no, not really,
00:03:26.860 because if you really sit down and ask somebody,
00:03:29.120 why are you cheating?
00:03:30.360 Like the guy in the back said,
00:03:32.360 I like pom pom.
00:03:33.440 I do, it's not always fun.
00:03:35.560 No, no, I said I was going by what he said.
00:03:39.760 I'm not saying all, okay, but that was his argument, right?
00:03:43.620 I like doing whatever.
00:03:45.300 So what I'm saying is, it's not about, well, you're the...
00:03:48.740 If I've gone and I've changed my line of who I'm putting the energy out there to catch,
00:03:55.480 if you're going to cheat, you're going to cheat.
00:03:57.060 And that's how I look at it.
00:03:58.360 I just want to add something.
00:03:59.180 And that's for male and female.
00:04:00.840 Look, I could be wrong here.
00:04:02.100 The lads may pick us up on this,
00:04:03.300 but like in terms of like when I got to the point where I felt like I'm a man,
00:04:06.960 I'm ready for the woman, 0.84
00:04:07.960 I'm in that right frame of mind,
00:04:10.100 I met a couple of girls where I was like,
00:04:12.920 I'm bringing up,
00:04:13.940 I'm bringing to the table a lot.
00:04:15.600 And they're still coming at me with the same attitude that they came at me,
00:04:19.520 that these other geezers with who aren't on my level. 0.98
00:04:22.360 And you think that that's going to fly with me.
00:04:24.220 And you don't realize like when I say,
00:04:26.880 I can't believe I'm going to say this,
00:04:27.760 but when I say jump,
00:04:28.640 you should be saying how high,
00:04:29.740 because that's actually like,
00:04:31.060 I'm going to change your life.
00:04:32.240 I'm going to mix.
00:04:33.040 I'm going to make it so you don't have to work anymore.
00:04:34.560 I'm going to buy you a car.
00:04:35.280 I'm going to buy you a dress.
00:04:36.040 I'm going to buy you everything you need.
00:04:37.160 Talk to a big dog.
00:04:37.960 If I'm going to make it so that you don't have anything to worry about, 1.00
00:04:44.080 then what the fuck are you doing for me? 0.98
00:04:46.140 Because if you're not free Friday, 0.99
00:04:47.820 don't expect me to call you Saturday,
00:04:49.820 because that ain't happening.
00:04:50.920 And that's what I was experiencing a little bit of.
00:04:53.120 It's like, 1.00
00:04:53.380 if you're going to treat me like another one of these fuck boys, 1.00
00:04:56.480 then goodbye. 1.00
00:04:58.440 I get that.
00:05:00.020 I totally understand that,
00:05:02.200 but I'm going to play devil's advocate here.
00:05:04.680 Good.
00:05:05.080 Those individuals hasn't actually healed.
00:05:08.780 They're bringing in.
00:05:09.760 And this is where women. 1.00
00:05:10.760 But why does he have to deal with their trauma?
00:05:12.580 No,
00:05:12.780 no,
00:05:12.920 no,
00:05:13.280 no,
00:05:13.380 no,
00:05:13.440 no.
00:05:13.540 And I don't expect him to.
00:05:15.820 What I was actually trying to say is those individuals are bringing in baggage from their past
00:05:22.060 relationships and they haven't.
00:05:24.160 Or some of them were in this,
00:05:26.160 like,
00:05:26.660 I don't know you guys have experiences,
00:05:28.220 but like some women, 1.00
00:05:29.440 because of the modern day women thing, 1.00
00:05:31.020 like modern women, 1.00
00:05:32.380 they go to uni,
00:05:33.140 they live on pot noodles.
00:05:34.160 They're messy.
00:05:34.760 They're slobs. 1.00
00:05:35.280 They're not like old school women who would like, 1.00
00:05:37.620 like old school women are fucking organized. 1.00
00:05:40.140 They know how to cook. 1.00
00:05:40.960 They know how to clean.
00:05:41.920 Everything that I'm not good at,
00:05:43.540 they come into your life and they're like, 0.99
00:05:44.960 Mary fucking pox. 1.00
00:05:45.900 But I'm saying the majority of modern women, 1.00
00:05:54.840 because of this uni lifestyle,
00:05:56.600 they're like more lad than what I am. 0.97
00:05:58.580 I'm more fucking cleaner and organized than they are. 0.95
00:06:00.980 So I'm, 0.97
00:06:01.580 and I'm obviously I'm generalizing and I will continue to generalize.
00:06:05.320 You get the point.
00:06:06.820 Yeah.
00:06:07.100 But that's maybe,
00:06:07.740 maybe that's why men have now a tendency or propensity to cheat because the quality of women are no longer like my mom, 0.99
00:06:13.480 my aunties,
00:06:14.980 but I get that.
00:06:16.180 But the difference is,
00:06:17.100 I think men are more likely to cheat.
00:06:18.520 Women choose non-monogamy. 1.00
00:06:20.300 Like they,
00:06:20.920 we choose non-monogamy because when we have the most sexual power,
00:06:24.860 which is like 21,
00:06:26.020 22,
00:06:26.440 23,
00:06:26.880 we choose non-monogamy.
00:06:28.580 It's not like there's a men.
00:06:29.780 That's true though.
00:06:30.340 Yeah.
00:06:30.820 When I was in this situation,
00:06:33.780 they were coming at me with this,
00:06:35.080 like this casual attitude.
00:06:37.040 It's like,
00:06:37.240 I'm ready to go.
00:06:38.080 And,
00:06:38.280 and,
00:06:38.480 and the thing is like men when they're in their peak,
00:06:41.100 which is like 35 more are married.
00:06:43.400 Cause the average age of first marriage is like,
00:06:44.980 32 for men and 31 for women.
00:06:47.540 So women choose non-monogamy in their twenties and their thirties ask for monogamy. 1.00
00:06:52.480 But with the problem is we bring less to the table because now you have a body count.
00:06:57.020 Now you have,
00:06:58.120 you have trauma from your exes that cheated on you that you like now.
00:07:02.080 But,
00:07:02.460 and,
00:07:02.620 and the thing that they don't tell women is by 30,
00:07:04.820 your chance of having a kid,
00:07:06.180 if you're single at 30,
00:07:07.320 your chance of having a child is below 50%.
00:07:09.900 That means we are more likely to not have a kid than have one.
00:07:12.900 No.
00:07:13.120 And I understand that.
00:07:14.040 And you know what I'm saying is,
00:07:16.720 it's like,
00:07:17.260 I get it.
00:07:18.360 Like,
00:07:19.160 like you said,
00:07:19.920 you would like somebody to match what you are bringing to the table.
00:07:24.040 So to speak,
00:07:24.820 like,
00:07:25.440 you know,
00:07:25.800 and I believe in a relationship,
00:07:28.380 you're there to instill and uplift each other.
00:07:32.680 So if,
00:07:34.020 if it's a case of,
00:07:35.240 well done by the way,
00:07:36.060 because there's a lot of like in modern day relationships,
00:07:38.460 like it's like who can take the most.
00:07:40.760 Whereas the reality,
00:07:41.960 it should be a competition.
00:07:42.760 I believe it should be a case of your uplifting me.
00:07:48.920 I'm uplifting you.
00:07:50.040 And we're elevating together.
00:07:53.700 It shouldn't just be,
00:07:54.840 Oh,
00:07:55.040 well,
00:07:55.380 what are you bringing to the table?
00:07:57.200 Like they're saying with the generation now,
00:08:00.380 it's not like that.
00:08:01.100 It's not in competition with each other.
00:08:02.860 And that needs to stop.
00:08:04.420 I get that.
00:08:05.860 I mean,
00:08:06.320 that's why a lot of things don't work.
00:08:08.560 Because of the competition.
00:08:09.940 But the issue is the quality of woman has gone down. 1.00
00:08:13.000 And like,
00:08:13.540 because there's a very small percentage of men that we would even consider.
00:08:17.100 So it's a very,
00:08:18.040 there's less than like 20% of men that we would even consider give a chance to.
00:08:22.320 Yeah.
00:08:22.480 So it's like,
00:08:23.320 and those men,
00:08:24.540 like the quality of woman is still low. 0.98
00:08:26.380 No,
00:08:26.800 and I get that.
00:08:27.500 I mean,
00:08:27.780 I'm a very old school woman.
00:08:29.400 Like I'm not going to sit here and say,
00:08:31.060 Oh,
00:08:31.160 I'm a virgin and I'm this and I'm that.
00:08:32.740 Okay.
00:08:33.140 This,
00:08:33.600 that's just,
00:08:34.240 yeah.
00:08:34.540 Anyway,
00:08:35.160 but I'm very much old school.
00:08:37.300 Like I,
00:08:38.240 I'm sometimes a little bit more.
00:08:40.580 I don't know how to pull it more mature than my age.
00:08:44.860 If however you want to pull it.
00:08:46.260 Like I believe if we're together,
00:08:49.320 I'm going to bring as much as I can,
00:08:52.720 as well as you can.
00:08:53.680 And if it means that we're going to start this road of life together,
00:08:56.800 where we build each other,
00:08:58.620 build our empire,
00:08:59.900 have our tribe and do what we need to do.
00:09:02.520 I'm about that.
00:09:03.500 And yes,
00:09:03.920 I can cook,
00:09:04.980 I can clean,
00:09:05.960 I can keep a house tidy and I can keep you satisfied.
00:09:08.960 But the question is again,
00:09:10.760 why do you still feel that that's still not enough for you?
00:09:16.020 Like you say,
00:09:16.740 can I ask you a question?
00:09:17.720 See,
00:09:17.900 that's the question.
00:09:18.680 What do you think?
00:09:18.780 What do you think women bring to the table that a guy couldn't get with a 1.00
00:09:21.820 cook, 1.00
00:09:22.200 a cleaner and a hooker? 1.00
00:09:24.000 Facts. 0.99
00:09:24.660 Okay.
00:09:25.120 Right.
00:09:25.840 Cause everything,
00:09:26.380 everything you listen to actually outsourced.
00:09:28.000 You've got to acknowledge.
00:09:28.600 No,
00:09:28.960 no,
00:09:29.060 I'm just,
00:09:29.560 no,
00:09:29.760 no,
00:09:29.940 I get all of that.
00:09:31.280 Okay.
00:09:31.960 No,
00:09:32.140 I'm asking like what,
00:09:33.060 what?
00:09:33.640 Me personally,
00:09:34.660 like I said,
00:09:35.600 I've had people ask me,
00:09:37.060 well,
00:09:37.200 what are you bringing to the table?
00:09:38.880 First of all,
00:09:39.660 I'm bringing myself.
00:09:41.260 Second of all,
00:09:42.120 I'm bringing my intelligence,
00:09:44.020 my weather.
00:09:45.300 I'm a spiritual,
00:09:46.000 if you have a higher IQ,
00:09:47.260 you're less likely to get married.
00:09:48.460 So intelligence.
00:09:49.580 Yeah.
00:09:50.660 Men don't like, 1.00
00:09:51.520 well,
00:09:51.700 that's what I'm talking about.
00:09:56.960 But intelligence could be taken in a different form of emotional intelligence.
00:10:01.120 There you go.
00:10:01.940 I'm not talking about all my IQs a million.
00:10:04.360 I'm not talking about it like that.
00:10:05.900 I'm talking about it is I've,
00:10:07.500 I'm bringing myself to the table.
00:10:10.020 I'm bringing what I know that I've got,
00:10:13.060 whether it's my qualifications,
00:10:14.820 my intellect,
00:10:16.880 you know,
00:10:17.280 yes,
00:10:17.540 like you said,
00:10:18.200 all of those things can be sourced.
00:10:19.840 And I get that.
00:10:21.580 I think,
00:10:21.940 but my point is like,
00:10:22.940 the,
00:10:23.400 the,
00:10:23.620 the,
00:10:23.800 the point I'm having is like,
00:10:25.280 we don't have a resume like our grandmothers and our great grandmothers did.
00:10:29.140 And so my point is like,
00:10:30.300 when you're dealing with these top percent of men,
00:10:32.340 which most men that you deal with are going to be top 20% because if we show you 10 men,
00:10:38.260 you're going to find eight of them as ugly just in general.
00:10:40.880 So,
00:10:41.440 so it's like when we're dealing with those men,
00:10:43.020 they have so much more leverage than we do.
00:10:46.400 And the issue is a lot of times like the women don't realize like in order to be with those guys, 1.00
00:10:51.900 you have to give up monogamy and you know,
00:10:54.260 there's some people that may sell you a dream.
00:11:00.360 I personally do believe it,
00:11:02.140 but like you say,
00:11:03.280 like no disrespect to yourself,
00:11:05.080 like you're a beautiful woman,
00:11:05.980 but obviously you're bringing,
00:11:07.040 you're saying you,
00:11:07.580 you,
00:11:07.740 you bring some stuff to the table.
00:11:09.160 You're bringing like your education,
00:11:11.480 your this,
00:11:11.880 you can clean,
00:11:12.320 but you're bringing that stuff,
00:11:15.380 but you're still single.
00:11:16.600 I feel not single.
00:11:17.300 You're still in a situation.
00:11:18.100 I never stated that I was single,
00:11:19.440 nor did I state that I was in a situation.
00:11:21.300 but continue.
00:11:22.440 Okay.
00:11:22.720 So,
00:11:22.840 so what are you currently in?
00:11:23.980 But you didn't say.
00:11:25.780 So it's like.
00:11:27.100 She put the hand up.
00:11:28.580 Who said more?
00:11:29.600 No,
00:11:29.760 no,
00:11:29.940 no,
00:11:30.020 I was saying.
00:11:31.280 No,
00:11:31.620 I'm saying,
00:11:32.160 I'm saying like,
00:11:32.860 it's like,
00:11:33.180 how is he,
00:11:33.600 he doesn't know because you don't answer,
00:11:35.040 like you won't answer the question.
00:11:37.040 No,
00:11:37.240 I don't know.
00:11:37.760 Is it a secret?
00:11:38.560 If we're married,
00:11:39.120 I'm not.
00:11:39.600 No,
00:11:40.040 I just don't want to.
00:11:40.860 I just don't want to.
00:11:41.680 Ring on the finger.
00:11:42.620 Okay,
00:11:42.900 cool.
00:11:43.400 But it's like a relationship podcast.
00:11:45.760 I would say,
00:11:46.280 yeah,
00:11:46.860 like you,
00:11:47.420 I feel like you'll be proud to say that I'm married.
00:11:49.600 I'm in a relationship.
00:11:49.920 I'm off the market.
00:11:50.880 I'm taken.
00:11:51.820 I'm off the market.
00:11:53.080 Well,
00:11:53.320 good.
00:11:53.840 Okay.
00:11:54.300 So I'll leave that there.
00:11:55.480 But I'm saying like,
00:11:56.800 even,
00:11:56.980 even so just like on paper,
00:11:58.440 right?
00:11:59.040 It's like you're 35.
00:12:00.680 There's no purity.
00:12:01.500 There's no youth there.
00:12:02.480 It's gone.
00:12:03.380 Like by 35,
00:12:04.100 you can't argue.
00:12:04.960 You bring,
00:12:05.180 that's the two most important things to men.
00:12:07.020 Like I said,
00:12:07.660 I was just banned on Tik TOK and we are demonetized on a daily basis on this platform.
00:12:14.920 If you want to help,
00:12:16.400 please consider sending a super thanks below.
00:12:19.260 Every donation helps and it helps make what we do possible.