JustPearlyThings - March 31, 2023


Post Wall Woman STOLE His Heart


Episode Stats


Length

10 minutes

Words per minute

223.0553

Word count

2,380

Sentence count

209

Harmful content

Misogyny

42

sentences flagged

Hate speech

23

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, the lads discuss the age old question of when is the right time to get married and have children. The lads talk about their own experiences with getting married at a young age and what they would have done differently if they were younger.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 And, you know, obviously, I don't have these traditionalist views, right?
00:00:02.280 So, you know, some of these guys are out here counting body counts.
00:00:04.800 For me, it's more like in the way they act.
00:00:07.660 Like, I messed around with, like, an older woman, like, a few months ago, 1.00
00:00:10.740 42, only ever been with one guy, you know, like, and I can just,
00:00:15.400 when I'm around her, it's just like, she's from a different age.
00:00:17.520 I would have run.
00:00:18.200 There was no, no, she's, you know, she's gorgeous, so I'm not running.
00:00:21.300 But she's from a different age.
00:00:22.920 Like, just the way she behaves, the way she cries herself, 0.60
00:00:25.320 the way she talks, very soft, very pleasant, not too opinionated.
00:00:29.040 It's just like, it's just like.
00:00:30.640 But she sounds like a real woman.
00:00:32.440 That's a, and I realized that being with her, I was like, yo,
00:00:35.660 there's no one in my generation that can, like, being around someone like that.
00:00:38.580 I was like, you know what, I'm a bachelor.
00:00:40.420 I'm probably going to be a bachelor for the next five, six, seven years.
00:00:42.060 That sounds like it.
00:00:42.940 But hanging out with her, I was like, yo, I actually get why people, like,
00:00:45.900 get married after hanging out with her.
00:00:47.280 Why was she on her own?
00:00:49.060 Why is she 42 and single? 1.00
00:00:50.520 Fussy.
00:00:50.840 It's not your business.
00:00:51.840 I'm not going to be saying that.
00:00:53.280 Oh, okay.
00:00:53.600 I always say that's their story, not mine.
00:00:55.040 That's their story, V.
00:00:56.020 Like, there's modern, modern, you know, problems have modern solutions,
00:00:59.320 but there's a lot of stuff going on here in London, but still.
00:01:01.720 I'm not going to lie.
00:01:03.880 Do you want children?
00:01:06.160 Ideally, yeah.
00:01:07.080 Oh, what a shame.
00:01:08.260 What's stopping you when you're saying ideally?
00:01:10.880 Just a bunch of things, meeting the right person.
00:01:13.120 The reason I was asking, because that woman sounds like she's captured a bit of him,
00:01:16.420 but she's old, you know what I mean?
00:01:17.620 So I ain't see no children.
00:01:18.740 No one can capture me, V, but I think, I think I always tell her, like,
00:01:22.060 I always tell her, like, if you were, like, 25, 20 years younger.
00:01:25.020 That's why I asked about children.
00:01:25.940 It would have been the end.
00:01:27.060 It would have been the end.
00:01:28.240 Because you sounded like, if she could breathe and be healthy, I would have her. 0.78
00:01:31.680 I'm not, I'm not missing out on that one.
00:01:33.480 Yeah.
00:01:34.060 I was just like, yeah, yeah.
00:01:35.140 If you were, like, 20 years younger.
00:01:36.660 Yeah.
00:01:38.520 I'll be getting some factory job.
00:01:39.840 I'll be like, oh.
00:01:41.640 Did you have something you wanted to add?
00:01:44.380 I forgot.
00:01:45.900 No, you said you're not going to lie.
00:01:47.200 Oh, yeah, yeah.
00:01:48.320 I ain't going to lie.
00:01:49.140 Don't lie.
00:01:50.700 I'm scared to get married.
00:01:52.440 Why?
00:01:53.180 Because the generation now compared to back in the days, 0.77
00:01:56.240 I'm talking before we were born, it was different.
00:01:58.720 Like, back in the days when they meet each other,
00:02:02.200 they get married and they just stay together.
00:02:04.200 You know what I'm saying?
00:02:04.560 But a generation now, it's like, it's bad. 0.98
00:02:07.780 It's toxic.
00:02:08.380 What I mean by that, it's like, everybody's just breathing each other.
00:02:11.300 Everybody's having babies.
00:02:12.820 And then they're never with that same person.
00:02:16.120 Do you get what I'm trying to say?
00:02:17.520 It's scary.
00:02:18.240 I mean, I've seen it so many times with a lot of people.
00:02:20.600 And it affects me.
00:02:21.900 The reason why I say it affects me is because it's not for you on a child.
00:02:25.000 And it's scary.
00:02:25.760 Imagine that you're not going to try to get married now.
00:02:27.600 Do you know what I'm saying?
00:02:28.280 I've always said, like, let's say for the time, for me, I have a son.
00:02:31.780 I tried so hard, obviously, to make the relationship work.
00:02:35.120 Yeah, I'm not saying I'm perfect.
00:02:36.520 You know what I'm saying?
00:02:37.040 But I was never acquitted.
00:02:38.780 I see it as like, if you've made a family disperse,
00:02:41.640 you've got to stick together for life.
00:02:43.580 Do you know what I mean?
00:02:43.840 But our generation, I think I blame the social media.
00:02:46.560 I feel like that is a distraction.
00:02:48.340 That's my honest opinion.
00:02:49.400 Technology.
00:02:50.360 Yeah, it's a technology.
00:02:51.560 So that's why I'm scared to get married.
00:02:52.560 I'm scared if I get married after three years, hold up, wait a minute,
00:02:55.980 oh, she's going to want to take my money. 1.00
00:02:57.360 Or she's going to want to take my house. 1.00
00:02:58.380 Can I ask you a question?
00:03:00.740 When was the last time you had sex?
00:03:03.060 You're asking me?
00:03:04.000 Yeah.
00:03:04.480 He's Jamaican, Nancy.
00:03:05.500 Maybe like two hours ago.
00:03:05.840 That got nothing to do, but I got Jamaican, man.
00:03:07.740 I got Jamaican.
00:03:09.300 Two hours ago.
00:03:10.140 No, no, no.
00:03:10.920 About two days, three days ago?
00:03:13.180 Oh.
00:03:13.720 Are you serious about that person?
00:03:15.880 No.
00:03:17.300 No, because the reason I'm asking that,
00:03:19.140 because the way he's describing,
00:03:21.040 I'm tired of people saying,
00:03:22.680 oh, this is what I want.
00:03:24.300 And things have changed.
00:03:25.480 And they're contributing towards it.
00:03:27.940 We have to be that, what we want to see.
00:03:29.420 You have to be accountability.
00:03:30.660 You can't turn around and say,
00:03:32.200 this is what I want.
00:03:33.500 But what are you doing?
00:03:35.300 To make that happen.
00:03:36.160 To make that happen.
00:03:37.440 Because the change don't come from out there.
00:03:40.180 The change comes from you within.
00:03:42.480 And if you want to see a change,
00:03:44.740 then it's down to each individual to start making the change.
00:03:48.220 You can't turn around and say,
00:03:49.740 this is what I want.
00:03:51.320 I don't want to be paddling in a muddy pool.
00:03:53.700 When you're helping, make the pool muddy.
00:03:57.260 Because at the end of the day,
00:03:58.500 what have you got to choose from?
00:04:00.800 The shit that you've already crept in.
00:04:03.420 That's why I said self-love.
00:04:04.980 I hear that, auntie.
00:04:05.960 But you get to ever have to agree with the same thing.
00:04:08.200 Even though you still love that person.
00:04:10.780 You know what you need to be?
00:04:11.740 You know what you need to be?
00:04:12.920 You need to be more fussy, more selective,
00:04:15.840 and treasure your dick. 0.99
00:04:18.860 Self-love.
00:04:20.120 I'm not going to lie.
00:04:21.820 Value yourself.
00:04:23.100 Those don't deserve it.
00:04:24.320 They don't deserve it.
00:04:25.220 As far as I'm concerned,
00:04:26.660 if you want somebody good,
00:04:29.280 don't be dipping your dick in somebody bad. 0.99
00:04:32.280 Auntie, I hear what you're saying.
00:04:33.600 But for us men, yeah?
00:04:34.940 And I'm talking for us men,
00:04:36.140 it's hard.
00:04:37.640 Go and jerk off.
00:04:38.520 It's not impossible, you know?
00:04:39.900 Jerking off is safe.
00:04:41.340 Have safe sex. 0.61
00:04:42.540 Jerk off.
00:04:43.640 Then you're not messing with nobody's mind.
00:04:45.380 You're not messing with nobody's body.
00:04:47.400 There's no chance that any contraception is going to fail
00:04:50.400 and that you can preserve yourself.
00:04:52.700 Stop banging things.
00:04:54.900 Auntie, um, Auntie.
00:04:56.200 You need to be more fussy.
00:04:57.720 You've got the right idea,
00:04:58.580 but I think, I think,
00:04:59.700 from a man to man, right,
00:05:00.920 I think you focus that energy.
00:05:02.880 Imagine you're saving that energy
00:05:03.940 for like the one, innit?
00:05:04.940 Kill it with it.
00:05:05.500 So, but,
00:05:06.080 masturbation, porn,
00:05:07.580 I think is not the way,
00:05:08.440 because masturbation...
00:05:09.000 Porn, porn. 0.98
00:05:09.860 Porn leads to,
00:05:11.320 leads to, um...
00:05:12.580 Oh, man, you're leaving me hanging.
00:05:13.800 I was giving you a spot right there.
00:05:14.820 Oh, my bad, G.
00:05:15.140 It leads to other things
00:05:16.420 and then it leads to that lack of discipline.
00:05:18.000 But I would say,
00:05:19.200 focus that,
00:05:19.820 imagine you're saving that energy
00:05:21.000 for the one, innit?
00:05:21.680 And it makes you all the more intense
00:05:22.920 because when you meet that one,
00:05:24.140 you pull out all the stuff.
00:05:25.300 That's even better.
00:05:26.420 Auntie,
00:05:26.540 no, but Auntie, 1.00
00:05:27.760 Auntie,
00:05:28.160 I'm just going to give you
00:05:29.440 a little devil's advocate here. 0.98
00:05:31.060 Okay.
00:05:31.200 I don't think your generation 1.00
00:05:32.640 really understands this.
00:05:34.360 Okay.
00:05:34.840 For men, like,
00:05:36.400 women like guys that sleep around 1.00
00:05:38.200 and, and treat,
00:05:39.980 like, women, 0.92
00:05:40.760 modern women don't like men 1.00
00:05:42.180 that treat them like queens. 1.00
00:05:43.360 And the problem is, like,
00:05:45.480 if, if guys
00:05:46.720 aren't sleeping around,
00:05:48.700 they start to, like,
00:05:50.200 think too highly of each girl
00:05:51.760 and treat them too well
00:05:52.740 and modern women don't like that. 1.00
00:05:54.480 It's not like in your generation 0.98
00:05:55.760 where, like,
00:05:56.480 a girl's courted 0.89
00:05:57.500 and, like,
00:05:57.820 they respect it
00:05:58.760 and they're excited
00:05:59.900 and, like,
00:06:00.280 you can just court the nice girl
00:06:01.640 and she, she wants you.
00:06:03.080 Like, for them,
00:06:03.820 it's, like,
00:06:04.900 basically,
00:06:05.400 if they give a girl 0.98
00:06:06.320 everything she wants,
00:06:07.480 then she doesn't like them.
00:06:09.300 And girls don't like guys 1.00
00:06:10.580 that don't sleep around.
00:06:11.460 Like, they only want guys
00:06:12.880 that sleep around.
00:06:13.740 All I can say to the young man,
00:06:14.820 if that's the case
00:06:15.780 and you've already got a child,
00:06:18.100 don't have no more
00:06:19.180 and get an old woman. 1.00
00:06:20.340 I hate her, Angie,
00:06:21.240 but then you get,
00:06:21.900 there's some woman out there 1.00
00:06:23.060 that's just...
00:06:23.820 No, I said,
00:06:24.260 get an older woman, 1.00
00:06:25.280 an old mature woman,
00:06:26.880 like, the woman that he said
00:06:27.980 that he found,
00:06:28.660 one that's feminine,
00:06:29.640 she can't breed, 1.00
00:06:30.360 you've already got a son,
00:06:31.220 you don't want no more children.
00:06:32.580 Concentrate on your one child,
00:06:33.880 have a happy relationship
00:06:34.840 with a woman that can't breed. 1.00
00:06:37.800 Problem solved.
00:06:38.480 But then, like,
00:06:39.100 you, though, innit?
00:06:40.000 I'm not, I'm not...
00:06:41.260 Sorry.
00:06:43.340 Sorry, are you going to say something?
00:06:45.020 No, go on, go on, go on.
00:06:46.620 Okay.
00:06:47.740 So my, what I think is,
00:06:50.700 it's modern times
00:06:51.680 called for modern solutions,
00:06:52.660 and that, like,
00:06:53.120 that free market
00:06:54.520 of people sleeping around
00:06:56.520 with each other,
00:06:56.960 I think that's always existed.
00:06:58.000 I think it's always going to exist.
00:06:59.240 I think the fact that
00:07:02.080 women value men 1.00
00:07:02.940 who are more experienced,
00:07:04.500 I think is a sign of that,
00:07:05.760 just the selection
00:07:06.440 in this dating game
00:07:07.160 has gotten a lot tougher.
00:07:07.980 I think that back in the day,
00:07:10.000 guys, guys would get with women 1.00
00:07:11.520 just because they were
00:07:12.020 in the right place, innit?
00:07:12.700 We were born in the same village,
00:07:13.880 she could be a Victoria's Secret model, 0.97
00:07:15.200 you could look like,
00:07:15.860 you know, Shrek,
00:07:16.640 and it's just like,
00:07:17.380 well, we were the same age,
00:07:18.700 I had a good job,
00:07:19.560 it worked,
00:07:19.940 our parents liked each other.
00:07:20.980 Now you really have to work,
00:07:22.360 you really have to be the guy, innit?
00:07:24.040 And so I would,
00:07:25.280 I would definitely kind of,
00:07:26.260 that's what I want to add,
00:07:27.220 that, like,
00:07:27.560 it's not all bad, innit?
00:07:28.940 Just another stat
00:07:30.180 to kind of give you
00:07:31.000 some perspective,
00:07:32.180 women, modern women, 0.92
00:07:33.680 find 80% of men
00:07:34.880 as unattractive.
00:07:36.400 And so on dating apps,
00:07:37.940 which people will argue
00:07:39.260 that maybe people
00:07:40.040 on dating apps
00:07:40.660 aren't looking for something serious,
00:07:42.120 but that's the number one
00:07:43.000 way people meet.
00:07:44.360 Women only swipe right 1.00
00:07:45.400 5% of the time,
00:07:46.900 up to 20% on the high end
00:07:48.840 in certain studies.
00:07:50.160 So women are all sleeping 1.00
00:07:52.140 with the same guys.
00:07:53.080 So for guys that are
00:07:53.860 in that percentage,
00:07:54.760 it's like they just have
00:07:55.860 an abundance of girls
00:07:56.920 throwing themselves at them
00:07:58.340 and then the women 1.00
00:07:58.900 will come back later
00:07:59.840 and say men are trash, 0.99
00:08:00.900 da, da, da, da, da,
00:08:01.380 but that's who, who's paying.
00:08:02.900 I think we need to have
00:08:03.740 a speed dating thing,
00:08:05.100 me and you, girl.
00:08:06.200 Yeah, I have.
00:08:07.500 We need to set up
00:08:08.100 a speed dating
00:08:08.940 or even a courting thing
00:08:10.620 when we show them
00:08:11.460 how to do it properly
00:08:12.220 and give them questions
00:08:13.580 to ask.
00:08:14.160 You know, speed dating,
00:08:15.320 but we provide the questions.
00:08:16.960 We, look at, look at you,
00:08:18.360 you're, we're helping
00:08:19.200 the open wife school, right?
00:08:20.600 Yes, yes.
00:08:21.220 We turn modern women 0.98
00:08:22.120 into wives. 1.00
00:08:22.880 We need to try,
00:08:23.940 we need to do it,
00:08:24.680 we need to do it.
00:08:25.260 They don't want to be saved.
00:08:26.080 No, they do.
00:08:26.840 I think some do.
00:08:28.160 They don't want to be saved.
00:08:28.620 Do you know what, right?
00:08:29.540 I think they do.
00:08:30.620 I think they do.
00:08:31.440 They want to have their fun.
00:08:33.100 No, but stop it, Alex.
00:08:34.720 Don't say that.
00:08:35.800 Like, oh, do you know what
00:08:36.760 annoys me?
00:08:37.400 The majority of women
00:08:37.620 don't want to be saved.
00:08:38.040 What you're saying is right.
00:08:39.580 I'm not saying that is wrong,
00:08:40.820 but why does it always
00:08:41.980 boil down to women? 0.93
00:08:43.940 Give them a chance.
00:08:44.840 Like, no, don't say no
00:08:46.100 because you see what Nathan said.
00:08:47.380 I like you, Nathan, by the way.
00:08:48.720 I appreciate, girl.
00:08:49.680 But what made me feel like
00:08:51.220 you're not scared.
00:08:52.460 You're more like scared
00:08:53.440 to be stuck in one
00:08:54.400 because there's so many options
00:08:55.540 out there because you keep
00:08:56.760 dipping your cookie
00:08:57.860 into the jars,
00:08:59.220 in different jars
00:08:59.920 of different sauces.
00:09:01.120 Thank you.
00:09:01.900 But here's the reason.
00:09:02.940 So I think, sorry,
00:09:04.060 the reason why you don't
00:09:04.840 want to come in,
00:09:05.580 I feel like the way
00:09:06.500 you explained it to me
00:09:07.280 to one jar is because
00:09:08.760 you're like, oh,
00:09:10.100 because you saw the other jar.
00:09:11.560 You saw the other thing.
00:09:12.420 You're like, it might taste.
00:09:13.180 Earlier on, you said
00:09:14.000 too many options.
00:09:15.040 That's what you said earlier.
00:09:15.860 Yeah, too many options.
00:09:16.940 Let me explain it to you.
00:09:18.780 So women leave, 1.00
00:09:20.000 women divorce men 0.97
00:09:20.900 70 to 80% of the time.
00:09:22.600 I would argue in relationships
00:09:24.320 it's probably similar.
00:09:25.520 Men aren't leaving,
00:09:26.280 women are. 1.00
00:09:27.160 So to a guy's point of view,
00:09:28.620 he's going to commit
00:09:29.260 to this girl.
00:09:30.660 And what does he get?
00:09:31.600 He doesn't get purity anymore.
00:09:33.120 You know, these hoes. 1.00
00:09:34.520 You know, he doesn't,
00:09:35.100 he doesn't get youth anymore.
00:09:36.100 So he doesn't get
00:09:36.700 either of those things.
00:09:37.680 A lot of times
00:09:38.180 she already has a kid. 0.98
00:09:39.120 So he's not fulfilling
00:09:41.380 his mating strategy.
00:09:42.620 On top of that,
00:09:43.140 even if he does find
00:09:43.960 a good woman that maybe 0.91
00:09:44.840 has the qualities
00:09:45.620 he's looking for,
00:09:46.960 she was going to want
00:09:47.980 him to marry her, right?
00:09:49.560 And what does he get
00:09:50.340 out of that?
00:09:50.820 Oh, she can leave 0.96
00:09:51.600 and take half
00:09:52.400 and take my kids. 1.00
00:09:54.560 And she's paid
00:09:55.500 to take my kids
00:09:56.440 away from me.
00:09:57.080 She gets more money 0.80
00:09:58.540 if she takes my children. 0.87
00:10:00.820 And so from the men's
00:10:01.700 point of view,
00:10:02.520 they're just kind of like
00:10:03.480 F it because
00:10:04.920 like women aren't wives 1.00
00:10:06.640 nowadays.
00:10:07.980 And what do they
00:10:08.800 get out of it?
00:10:09.740 Men are logical.
00:10:11.580 They're logical people.
00:10:12.800 And so they're thinking,
00:10:14.100 does the benefit
00:10:15.080 outweigh the cost?
00:10:16.420 And like,
00:10:17.100 I just think as women,
00:10:18.200 we have to look at ourselves
00:10:19.140 and say,
00:10:19.940 the benefits we bring
00:10:21.300 nowadays don't outweigh
00:10:22.480 the cost for most men.
00:10:24.180 As many of you know,
00:10:25.080 I was just banned
00:10:26.240 on TikTok
00:10:27.140 and we are demonetized
00:10:28.860 on a daily basis
00:10:30.100 on this platform.
00:10:31.920 If you want to help,
00:10:33.400 please consider sending
00:10:34.520 a super thanks below.
00:10:36.460 Every donation helps
00:10:37.760 and it helps make
00:10:38.600 what we do possible.