She DEFENDED Her Delusion with Everything
Episode Stats
Words per minute
197.21019
Harmful content
Misogyny
51
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Toxicity
3
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Hate speech
54
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Summary
In this episode, we discuss the differences between single fathers and single fathers, the benefits of co-parenting and the issues that single fathers have with their kids. We also talk about the issues single fathers face when it comes to being a single father and how to deal with them.
Transcript
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But if you don't want to deal with that baggage, then don't date them and you know, but he's saying he doesn't because that's baggage to him
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And I think he should be it like allowed to say that
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Yeah, he can say that and remember men have baggage too. Let me tell you the baggage that men carry
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You always like you always you always do this whenever we say something about women
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We always have to say something about men. We do because we have to be fair
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Why? We have to be fair because a man though all that they get there's two things that happen
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We talk about, Deneva, we talk about men's baggage all the time
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My way that we talk about because I don't really hear them
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What are you talking about in the media all the time? Why is men are trash? Why is that a common?
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No, that's not baggage. That's that's a judgment the baggage that men carry if they're older they get as well means they either
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Been incels for longer or they've fucked around for longer
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So those two bring two problems either you're going to be insecure and think that you cannot trust any woman because you've been with too many three or fours or
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You're going to be very insecure in yourself in your manly hood because you've not had enough experience
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Some men have the insecurities and they have their baggage
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That's why you'd rather be with somebody that's somewhat on your level because it's easier for both of you to carry the same
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Some men have baggage some women have baggage but I'm saying men and we're like like men and women don't look at children the same and you can't change reality
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It just is what it is. Yeah, like like I've heard guys say they get more girls after they have kids
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I've never heard a single mother say her her dating options got better after a child. I've never heard that
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Like I heard I've heard guys say they brought their kid to the park because they know the girls would like, you know
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Men don't want to have to spread their resources to kids done
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And it's also like they have a lot of risk that comes with that like they have to invest in a kid
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That's not theirs and I don't know if you have kids and I don't know you know how old the kids are
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But especially if they're young they could raise a kid for 10 years and have no legal rights to that child at the end of it
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They've got they've got options if they want to be an involved in the child's life
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Obviously, it's a man's choice if they want to be that involved and have rights
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They they can legally adopt and give their name to that child or they are just the
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Woman's partner who has kids in their life right and they can and I think I think if more women would do that
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I thought that would help well, but I don't think that's typical with a lot of single mothers
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And it's not that's not what I've gathered because because you ask them like can can the dad discipline the kid as his own?
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So if you disagree with like he spanks your kid you disagree with it
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Would you let him do it and a lot of single mothers say no to that question
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But there are a lot more single mothers than single dads
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Right because the court system doesn't allow a lot of men to see their children
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I mean women win custody 90% of the time and
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And there's a lot of guys that get screwed in court and don't get access to their children leave kids a lot more
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Obviously, there's statistics on that, but there's also
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There's a big community of men that don't have access to their children and they're not being recognized
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Right and there's a thing where you hear this a lot you hear this a lot, but it's like
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There are there are stories of children that were led to believe by their mothers that their father left them and there's somehow at the blue
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Regain contact with his father after like 25 years or something or 10 or 15 years or minus his childhood
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via my LinkedIn and then found out that it was actually his mother
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That pushed him away, but he was indoctrinated with the belief that he was abandoned by his father
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So it's just like whenever I had these these kind of things. I'm not necessarily saying that not not all men are amazing fathers and stuff
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but there's a lot of men out here that don't have a voice and
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All the focus is on the women's side of things particular things particularly single fathers because
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I have personal experience of co-parenting right and
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I'm not not not I try not to like make too much of a comparison between men and women but from personal experience
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Women have many advantages that single fathers would dream of having
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Something as basic as picking up your child from nursery and having to be interrogated because you're seen as a threat because you're around little children
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Every single day for the next 15 to 13 years all these kind of things all add up
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So I'm just saying that there's there's more to it than that than just like
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Yeah, and I agree with you to an extent because um
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Incarceration like mass incarceration in america is mainly men
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So a lot more women are forced to be single mothers
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Yeah, so I agree with you. I'm just saying from society most men in the room right. Yeah
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When you go into a place that has lots of little children, what do you do like what's your first response?
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Well, I'm distancing myself as much as possible. Do you know what I'm saying?
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Yeah, and then can you imagine being that child that man with a child?
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It's like it's a it's a really really challenging dynamic
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Because men are portrayed as like predators way more often that it would be kind of scary because you don't want to be seen like that
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Like you like you want to be like loving but you also feel restricted by how society views you
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Yeah, and and I'd like to say too in the you in the us of there the women
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Are incentivized to take away the kids from the dad because they're paid more um if the if the dad doesn't see the kids
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They're given more money from child support, so they're literally paid to take away the kids from the dad
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I just have to say ladies if you're doing that
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That's terrible because having a man that is willing to be in your child's life is a blessing
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If he's willing to do the right work if you're if you're sleeping you're sleeping and that's your fault
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As much as I champion my sisters, and I always want to protect women
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I do know that when it comes to the relationship between
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That's something that you really shouldn't play with and you shouldn't use that to your advantage or to for power or for financial gain for whatever
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It is you're going to hell for that because it's your child that's yeah
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And taking off that point that's why I wouldn't date a really older guy because if he had kids
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Or if I wanted to have kids when I was like when I was my age they wouldn't be there for me
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They couldn't be a father figure because they would die a lot
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Earlier than I would and then I would be left with the responsibilities. That's actually what my dad says with dating older guys
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My dad says you should date someone younger as a girl
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Which is like the opposite of red pill because he says women live longer. Yeah, that's like a logical guy just logistics
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I thought we would die the same age roughly. Yeah
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Um, let's do the actual mia khalifa video. I found the actual one. I wanted to show you guys
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I hope I hope to god this is it you got to start it from the beginning blessing
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Who goes after a girl significantly younger than them is severely lacking in their life and I I mean that
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Confidence wise I mean like they are falling short in so many places that that is the only
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Place they can turn to to feel like they have they have something on the scale of power
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I mean, there's just no way to kind of because you're manipulating someone who does is not aware of what they're giving you and it's unfair
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So my question is why are men called predators for going for younger women
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But women don't typically have that same energy for women that go for younger men
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I don't know exciting older women are also predators honestly
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Like if you're dating someone that much younger they have way less life experience
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Like you know how to like shape them like you know how to get them way easier
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What would you put at predator? Like what what's your what's the age gap that you would say predator?
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It's a less negative word. I don't know to be maybe
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15 20 years 15 20 years and would you say the age gap?
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Does it matter how old the younger person is like if they're 30?
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Yes, yeah, it does matter if they if I think if they're under like 25 or they're under 25 or like under 27
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Predator is the wrong word and should never be used. Predator is the word you use when you're going after
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There isn't being predator just someone that has kind of power over you
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No, no a predator is someone who he's seeking out to do harm
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So where there where there are adults who seek to do harm in a certain way which I you know
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That is what is called a predator a predator is not what was described in that video
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If you were a man of any age whether you were going after a male or female child
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Intending to meet them to do what you're going to do that is a predator
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So on that video a predator predator is the wrong word and it's taken out of context
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And it of course it's going to blow up on social media and people are going to start
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People are influenced by people like her and you're going to start every time you see some a couple out on the street or in a bar
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You're going to turn around oh, he's a predator or she's a predator because you've heard it on social media
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It's the wrong word if you want to know what a predator is
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I don't know if you're underage. It's not consensual. It's between two consensual adults
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I do agree like your predator must have a bit more intention than that
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But I think she's saying I don't know. I don't know what she's saying
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I'm just thinking over the case like you're you're 18 you have the same
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Rights that I do if you want to jump in a car right now
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You can go do it if you want to vote you can vote like we're both adults
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You know, I mean if we're talking about under 16 and all them type of things then we could talk about a different story
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But I think it's a like like like um, Miss lady in front said, you know
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My real question is I I don't see the same energy for women
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I mean even even when you started they're like, okay
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But it's like on social media if a man says I like a girl that's significantly younger
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He's shamed for it, but women are I agree. Yeah
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I think that in a girl's world if you're dating a guy that is younger than you you are
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Why are you going for like that's younger than you?
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No, i'm just saying that's how it is usually in the girls world
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And I think that the difference stems from the intentions as well
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I think generally a man that goes for women that is younger it'll be for those reasons of like okay
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She's less combative. She's um, you know easier to mold and all these things fine. Is that wrong?
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Wait, whereas if you're a woman and you're going for a younger guy a lot of the time
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Now they've got a whole woman so I think it's like I think that the intentions may be slightly different
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And that's why I mean what they're getting at and I think they're probably talking from experience
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You can tell the look in their eyes when you're when you're a young woman and especially if you're a pretty young woman
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A lot of older men will approach you and at that moment in time when you're that age
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There's a lot of things that you really just don't know in fact
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You don't even know enough about men to be able to navigate the world with these sort of men after you
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We'll see you such a strong word to describe it because actually at the end of the day it is a little bit twisted
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But why don't we have that same energy of young women that go after older men for their money?
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No, no, he just hit me look at what do they say that the
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No, the economy is so bad that you have Leonardo DiCaprio dating 27
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I asked the women who go for younger men, so it's wrong for
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Let's say it's wrong for men in their 30s to go for 18 year olds. I understand why they would like the
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submissive being cooperative and like less bodies
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But why would an older woman in their like 30s go for a guy who is like 20 like
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What benefits? What benefits do you get from going from a man that's like 10 years younger?
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Do you not want that and the girls that actually go for younger men? I do not want a man that can provide and
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Be like a proper leader. I know there are some younger guys, but generally speaking men men under 30
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They can't really give you what you want. So I just want to know why
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But I would say they love you way harder if they're younger because you're more likely to be that one of their first loves
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Do you know what I mean? Like I think as they are older the love gets a little bit more like I've done this a thousand times like
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I mean, it's kind of a mating strategy in a way because it's like
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Men have less sexual capital when they're younger and then women have less sexual capital when they're older. So they kind of
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Hit off each other. Yeah, and don't forget also what the boys said earlier. They're like, oh, yeah
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She was so much more mature and she was this and yeah
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I enjoyed it and this so they appreciated her. That's it. So it's nice. Yeah, but what's the what's the woman getting in?
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That's why don't forget that women also vending they require a lot of validation
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So sometimes when you go for younger man that he's able to give you that
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But all these guys have just said that they're only looking to like not really like a long commitment with an older woman because she has like
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So like what is the older woman getting out of this if it's not just fun
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Like if it's if she's looking for a long-time commitment
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Like what is she finding with these young men that don't want a long-time commitment with an older woman?
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Yeah, I'm gonna ask you if you actually date younger men
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Um, yeah, it's companionship and I won't judge a young man my
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I've said it already earlier on my ex was a lot younger than me and
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There are some gaps there are things that he won't know and I won't know and then somewhere you sort of just meet in the middle
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But you get companionship you you know, I I was in love
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We were I could say we were genuinely in love, you know
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We broke up, but yeah, we were together four years and that was with someone younger than me
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I had companionship. I had friendship. I had someone that understood me
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I had love I had someone that looked out for me
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He was actually a great cook. Um, I'm a bit lazy at that
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His home and there was always food food waiting for me not because I couldn't you know go in the kitchen and make something
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It was a real relationship. So everyone experiences something different
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Oh, you can't go out with a younger man or you can't go out someone old man
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So you might tell me I can't go out someone that's 60 or 70
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But what happens, you know, if I'm attracted they're a nice man
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The relationship is nice. They're a good person to me
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Yeah, the companionship is a big word. So to me, it doesn't really matter. You have to it's something that we all said here before
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So if I'm going to have a relationship, I mean, I don't want to fling I don't want to be
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I don't want to be with a man that's just going to fling his bits around
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It doesn't matter how old you are obviously we all have age restrictions
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But if I like you we're attracted you respect me
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You know, you have love for me. You're my friend. You're my companion. You look out for me
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You're a man. You're a man. You're a leader. You know how to look after me
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It doesn't really matter if you've got all those qualities
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No, never mind the age and some people I know that men I think mature a little bit later
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We will know that what happens when there's those individuals who are the right one for you
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I just have a question like yeah, you know, obviously you think that way now when you was like in your late
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Um late 20s or like early 30s, did you think the same way?
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Like would you still look for like a younger guy in that same companionship role or you?
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No, nothing nothing is recent. My views have never changed
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Just a man has to be a good man someone that wants to
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But can I just ask would you seek out a younger man actively actively actively no
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But if one crossed my path and they happen to be you know, let's say
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If one crossed my path and all of a sudden I met them and and they I said how old were you and they told me
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I'm not all of a sudden going to turn around say i'm sorry can't date you because your age
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They might be the right person for me. Yeah, fair enough. What about like an 18 year old?
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Like if you were just out there and an 18 year old came up with you and was like, oh, you're a beautiful woman
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But it's kind of interesting because you kind of contradict yourself
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I understand what you mean to talk about contradictions
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So we all have age limits and we've all talked about it here tonight
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And whilst I'm talking about yes, I will date a younger man
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I still have my limits, so I don't think that's me contradicting myself. I'm saying yes, I'll date a younger man
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But I'm capping a limit just like everybody else. So I don't think I'm I'm being contradictory
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In terms of my experience with women, yeah
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I've never actually been in a relationship with a woman that's younger than me
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Hear in these discussions for me that the two key words of the two takeaways are youth and maturity
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As being a lot more older than I then I guess in terms like the barometer of men my age
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And that's sort of what a lot of women responded to
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In comparison to the the age that they had the mental image that they had of me
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It sort of I don't know just sort of made something inside them just go a bit
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I don't know, um a bit addicted to me in a certain way
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So I just think I think it goes both ways because you were saying earlier about the 18 year olds and the 32
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If someone carries themselves as like a 25 year old or a 42 year old and stuff more often than not we kind of like
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Connect with that as opposed to checking people's id cards. So
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It's all what society and people around us say is the right thing to do
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It's it's it's almost like saying I can't be your friend
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You know everyone has to eat me mint chocolate if you want to be connected to me
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Because that's what society that's what the news tell us to do
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How about what you want to do and have sitting down with yourself and thinking actually
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Is that the right person for me or am I only doing what society
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Um, do you typically not tell people your age when you meet them like guys you're talking to or interested in?
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I've been i'm i've been single for a couple of years by choice
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So i'm not i'm not going to just go out there and date anyone and just for the sake of it
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Um, once I start talking to someone yeah, we do we do discuss ages and backgrounds and okay
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Has anyone ever um rejected you because of your age?
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I'm always yeah, I think the only time you get rejected
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Colour race religion culture those are the things when all of a sudden
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Things change but age no i've never had a problem with that
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I have actually been rejected because of my age
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So I just think like age is also equal to like race color
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I've met older guys and then they find out that I am
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Like at the time 18 19 20 whatever and they were like, oh no, you're too young
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So I think it's very it's just very circumstantial
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But the probability when you're younger that you're not going to match with someone a bit older than you is more likely like
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Like concept you're you're more likely to like a mint chocolate that's your own age
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Because you're in the same stage of life more likely
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But obviously there's going to be those people those outliers that that are that do match you
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Have any raise your hand out of the guys has a girl ever told you that you're too young for her
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You're you had a guy so four out of five when you're asking that question you're talking about now or when we were younger
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Yes, there's exceptions to the rule like the minimals the one percent all of these things that is fantastic
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Ideally would work fantastically, but I the way I look at a relationship is that
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You're both running the same race separately
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Be successful you're both running the same race separately
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Yeah, the same way that you say people are the same
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But they're different the same difference all that kind of thing because this is it
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We're but it's like a parallel thing and you're striving towards the same goal
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Which would be to raise a family to obviously have a good relationship together for the rest of your life success blah blah blah blah blah
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And I think it's much easier and I think it's more you're more likely to succeed if you are at similar stages and levels
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Because there's so much more understanding in terms of even culture in terms of social context and everything
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More successful in that with somebody that is closer to you in so many more areas
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What do you think the number one swiped right age is on dating apps for men and for women if you've heard this on the show before?
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What do you okay? What do you think the number one swipe right so like yes?
00:23:07.880
On dating apps. Women is probably going to be like 32 no?
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I would say 22 for women. No women's going to be really young
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So men and for women start here and then go around
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Um for men I'd probably think 24 25 for women um 40
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So I think men are probably gonna pick like
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22 23 I think guys are probably gonna go for like
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Oh wait wait am I saying like guys are going for them?
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Yeah, so I think guys will be going for like 25 year olds
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I think women are going for like older like 28 29 because they want the money
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Yeah, okay. I think most guys have money by 28 29
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Yeah, but I think they're like more likely to be successful
00:24:04.360
Um, I think men are going for like probably like 21 maybe even like 20 19 and then girls are going for like 26
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Okay, uh girls are going out say 22 24. No, sorry guys are going for women who are around 22 23
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and I think women are going for guys that are like 29 30
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That are probably 22 23 and women are going for guys
1.00
00:24:43.320
Me I think uh, the men will go after the girls who are
1.00
00:24:48.200
20 21 and then the girls are probably going like 32 to be fair
0.99
00:24:53.720
Yeah, I'd say most swiped women 22 most swiped guys 30
00:25:02.680
I was actually really I didn't believe this when I first saw it. I was shocked and I'm I'm me, you know
00:25:17.000
It's actually older. It's actually older than that. It's 50. Wow
00:25:27.480
I don't know if it was plenty I could look it up
00:25:29.400
I don't I don't know the exact app someone someone put in the comments
00:25:43.720
I mean, I would say I would say the most desired
00:26:08.760
Should I address the elephant in the room, pal?
00:26:12.200
Well, should I address the elephant in the room?
00:27:16.920
Like women are attracted to a guy that can protect and provide
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00:27:19.800
A man hits his financial stride and it's like 40s or 50s
00:27:23.480
Men tend to be attracted to fertility and youth
00:27:26.600
I don't think most guys like want to date an 18 year old super
00:27:29.160
Like I don't I don't talk to a lot of guys in real life
00:27:33.720
Like it seems to be more like 22 to 28 seems to be what guys I talk to typically say
00:27:40.760
But um yeah, I mean typically men go for fertility and youth
0.99
00:27:45.320
That's why they call it forever 21 not forever 50
00:27:50.600
I think as as society becomes more perpetuated on how people look
00:27:55.080
Younger girls aren't going for us old guys because I know in myself
00:27:58.280
Like I wouldn't give someone super old because I couldn't take a picture with them
00:28:01.000
Like I couldn't be as proud of them and I think society's becoming feminized in that aspect
00:28:07.400
Um yeah, I mean that's what it's funny. I was really surprised by this. I swear to god when I saw this data
00:28:15.080
I couldn't believe it because I was like I don't know many girls that want to date 50 year olds
00:28:19.400
But that's what they're swiping on but you know it's on tinder then we have to consider that
00:28:42.040
It's because of the way people are using dating apps people don't actually use dating apps to get married
00:28:46.840
No, okay, so that's that's what you would think right, but it's actually it's actually the number one way people meet today
00:28:54.360
That's the number one so ladies and gentlemen, that's why we have issues
00:28:59.320
No, you're you're you're right you're right, but i'm saying like that's if that's the number one way long-term relationships are forming nowadays
00:29:06.280
And that's what men and women are swiping on that says something
0.53
00:29:10.280
And some some apps are a little different, but they're only different by like a couple years. It's really not that different
00:29:17.000
Is it like dating apps are kind of like corn they over exaggerate the reality of things you
00:29:22.920
When you're going on on dating apps, you can actually
00:29:26.200
Be in touch with an 18 year old where in reality if you're a 50 year old man hanging around 18 year old you're a weirdo
00:29:34.120
If you're if you're hot you're hot like hot girls get swiped say like it
0.68
00:29:40.120
But but the point is in general men tend to like younger women and in general women tend to like older men
00:29:45.960
But the exaggeration of the 18 is just an exam. It's just showing it. It's not very good
00:29:51.480
And that's what people are seeing and they're looking at it's not very it's not a very good example
00:29:56.200
To said it's not actually something great. It's not valid
00:30:00.600
These stats are things that they're they're part of a what i would say a certain
00:30:07.000
Fantasy and idealization of what people think dating is
00:30:10.360
And you and then they're they almost become a reality and it stops it, but it is what it is
00:30:18.520
If if we ask the married people, how did you meet your spouse and they say dating apps and then we go to the dating apps and say
00:30:24.840
Okay, what ages are people swiping on i have to
00:30:28.040
How is that so reality no that that what that is doing is just showing how twisted it is
00:30:33.240
So basically, there's a lot of men that are going looking for young girls online 18 not even 22 or 23 18 blood
00:30:48.120
It does matter it does matter because it's the same thing that keeps saying like is this fantasy this
00:30:54.520
Guys so if you if you've taken anything from this conversation guys don't really care about age
00:31:00.280
Like the number that's just are you hot are you not
00:31:07.080
When like i think what you're trying to emphasize is that
00:31:10.680
Like that for women there's a lot more of an idealization for youth like when it's with men
00:31:14.680
It's not as attached like as as women get older a lot of people think oh that they're not as smart
0.93
00:31:20.040
They're not as that their advice isn't as helpful, but when men get older they're more wise they're more helpful
00:31:25.960
Like like you always hit the wise man story you don't hit the wise woman's story. Yeah, okay
00:31:34.280
Yeah, in a way because it displays that you're not as fertile in and and i think that's what pa would say
00:31:39.720
But an average woman knows that herself because i mean
0.96
00:31:42.440
It's just clear that you guys obviously put so much more attention money into your parents
00:31:48.200
We spent we spent three hundred thousand dollars more in a lifetime on beauty products
00:31:51.800
And i mean like why why why do we get why do we get lip filler? Why do we get botox?
00:31:56.120
Why do we get all of this stuff to look younger like we know it on some level
00:32:00.040
But beautiful women get better men that pay for a nicer lifestyle so that's the sad truth
1.00
00:32:05.640
Also are these guys even looking at the age because they could just be seeing young good looking swipe right
00:32:10.360
Do you know i wanted to say that like dudes are just here you could just swipe through
00:32:14.360
No that's what i'm saying i don't think they care i think they're like hot or not hot
00:32:18.360
Yeah, hot or not, they're not looking at age prices
00:32:20.360
But you're all likely to be hot if you're younger that's what we're saying like there's a correlation between the two
00:32:24.840
I mean we all know those people that peaked in high school and like and you know now they look like a mini whale or a legal whale
00:32:33.960
But i just want to be clear so like this you keep on saying the younger a girl is the hottest she is
00:32:40.040
So it's like i genuinely don't think in hotness there's a massive like i actually think girls in their 20s like mid
1.00
00:32:47.640
Like just early 20s mid 20s late 20s they look better than 18 year olds
00:32:51.640
They know they have money they know how to do their makeup
00:32:53.960
They know how to like this idea that 18 year olds yeah 18 year olds look better than any girl in it
0.99
00:33:02.200
The date in that profile picture would just be like a boohoo dress or something so
00:33:06.920
And honestly if you date an 18 year old that doesn't look great you can just influence her to dress how you think it's better
00:33:11.720
I mean they they say it's like 18 to 28 is like when a woman's sexual peak is like these are her best years
0.98
00:33:20.120
And and it's kind of it's it seems to be kind of similar with the answers to the guy that the guys gave
00:33:25.560
When's a man's best year um they i mean that according to this this date like it depends who you ask
00:33:33.480
But this said 50 was the number one age swiped right on um
00:33:38.040
anecdotally i would guess mid 30s early 40s i would say because then i mean because
00:33:43.800
You have all the girls that are younger than you it's like a bigger pool and imagine
0.85
00:33:48.920
but i i i feel like the um the data skewed though in the sense that um from personal experience
00:33:57.320
the younger you go the more options you have as in people actually using these dating apps
00:34:03.000
um so there's probably like a smaller pool of like people probably above 25 faith faith
00:34:08.360
you're looking for certain serious and there's a lot more like you know you've got your computer and people in universities
00:34:13.560
so there's like a if there's going to be like i don't know
00:34:16.760
40 of the total 100 in university then chances are the 18 year old kind of that makes more sense
00:34:21.800
yeah you're right yeah i'm saying in terms of people going for that because
00:34:25.560
um i used i think hinge like a couple months ago and
00:34:30.200
i set my preference um i think my lower end was like 23 and you ran out of options
00:34:36.760
but then when you drop it down to 22 all of a sudden it's just flooded you know i mean so
00:34:40.680
i think there's also some sort of skewing in terms of that statistics because
00:34:44.840
all the men here for me is just generally like 20 at the age that i'm at
00:34:48.760
i know that nearly every man that i know is going to 22 23 22 is a bit too young but that 23 is like
00:34:54.760
the ideal age um and then the older you get i guess it just kind of stays around there and then goes up a
00:35:01.880
bit completely like i don't know like more people that are young use dating apps like more 18 to 21
00:35:07.160
year olds use dating apps more than you would say like a 28 to 32 year old because they're looking
00:35:12.200
for like people roughly that age and i know people that are younger use the internet more often and
00:35:17.080
stuff like you don't get like many 40 year olds like on dating apps i don't think personally just
00:35:21.080
from my personal experience yeah so how valid is the data basically exactly how accurate is it it
00:35:25.480
doesn't show like a complete like representation of all the different ages i just think the point is
00:35:30.440
that men tend to like younger women and women tend to like older men even if the data is a bit off by
00:35:35.560
like five years like let's give it five ten years it's still it's still the general conclusion is
00:35:41.000
still going to be the same when it's 18 and 50. i'm not going to lie i kind of let me tell you a truth
00:35:46.360
that i must admit i agree with you now pearl i always said that i want my man to be older than me even if
00:35:54.280
it's by one year because that one year alone will be able to give this nice room where i can give him
00:36:00.200
another sort of respect above me because submission for me is difficult so i need to find different
00:36:06.520
ways to add to respect so if he's older than me that helps if he earns the meat more than me that
00:36:14.120
helps it's not because i want his money but because it will allow me to actually give him the respect
00:36:19.000
that he is looking for as a man naturally without having to like fake it women tend to like um a guy is
00:36:25.880
five to seven years older than them and then there's another study which was closer to 22 where
00:36:31.400
they asked men like when they found women the most attractive between the ages of like 18 and like
00:36:36.200
70 and they all said 22. so it's it's you know different studies will give it but it's it's generally for
00:36:43.000
women between 18 and 25 roughly good to be an extension to the rule yo can i ask a question like um
1.00
00:36:52.280
uh actually it's more directed to my man at the back i'm sorry i forgot your name oh just josh
00:36:57.320
um just on this whole the baggage thing like you were like oh when they're older there's baggage you
00:37:02.280
don't want to deal with that and it's kind of like and you were like she's got issues she's got life
00:37:06.040
experiences and whatnot and it's just from the perspective of like let's accept issues are quite
00:37:11.800
baggage um like most of people's issues come from like in their younger years like their relationship
00:37:18.040
with their parents like abuse that happens with like extreme cases abuse when they're like younger
00:37:23.800
children like just so you can get i suppose my point is you're here you look for a younger girl
00:37:30.200
because she's i suppose more of a clean slate but what happens when you get like a younger girl and
00:37:35.640
she's like gone through that sort of stuff or like has mental health problems or do you get what i mean
00:37:39.880
no definitely definitely and what what i would say to that is to think of it like this
00:37:44.360
let's say even if the case that they do experience at a younger age the more time i give them they're
00:37:51.000
going to still be in the dating pool they're still going to have other experiences adding on top of
00:37:55.160
that so i think of more i think it more of like let me catch it at the shortest point you know what i
00:38:01.320
mean because sure you could go through all those different traumas whatever whatever but then i could
00:38:06.680
be that cutting point for you you know what i mean instead of you going into five other different
00:38:10.440
relationships to 30 other different bodies okay maybe that's extreme but it's like the more time
00:38:15.560
i give you the more that's going to be added on to that so it's like let me just cut it while it's
00:38:20.280
short you know you feel me yeah isn't that the same for men then as well um because men will get more
00:38:26.200
barriers the longer they live i don't really think you you like originally i don't think you guys really
00:38:32.200
care about that in the sense like because i think we have two we have different type of baggage women
00:38:37.240
love baggage actually i don't want a man with kids yeah that's what you would think but but that's
00:38:43.240
not true according to the day you know felons um violent felons reproduce more than non-violent
00:38:48.680
felons can i just ask a question here um correct me i feel like when the guys are talking about baggage
00:38:55.800
and then when the women are talking about baggage i feel like the word the definition of that word
00:39:00.280
is slightly different two different things so yeah when you're saying baggage i feel like i understand you
00:39:05.720
but when you you're saying baggage i feel like something else you're talking about something
00:39:08.760
else i'm seeing kids i'm seeing a lot of past relationships i'm saying trauma that i could
00:39:13.000
step on accidentally things like that is that the same for the rest of you i consider that kind of
00:39:18.760
baggage maybe yeah i don't think i don't personally think that men with kids is baggage but i think
00:39:25.480
women with kids are baggage for men because you guys gotta provide for the kid after the kid and
1.00
00:39:31.480
everything i just don't think if a man's in a certain position that you want him to be and if he's got a
00:39:35.560
kid then i don't see that as baggage but you're gonna have to be a mother to someone else's
0.97
00:39:39.240
thank you how is that not baby mama baby mama drama yeah i'm constantly seeing a child that reminds
00:39:45.880
you of their ex as a jealous lady thank you i'm not saying it's the same type of baggage but it is
00:39:55.880
it is like a responsibility that you wouldn't know do you get what i mean it's not like ideal but
00:40:02.680
i just think um it's less important than that it's worse for you guys to meet a woman that has kids
00:40:09.720
than for me to meet a man that has kids i think um the mum usually looks after the kid anyway
0.92
00:40:17.000
in most cases more than the dad you don't have to actually be a step-mom
00:40:23.000
i don't think okay wait so just so i i'm just i don't want to misunderstand you so you're saying
00:40:28.280
for a man going for a woman who has kids it's more it's it's all baggage but it's more of a
00:40:35.080
baggage for a man entering that situation it's more of a burden for a man into that situation
00:40:42.520
if if dads are less involved then being a stepdad you basically don't have to do because men are less
00:40:46.440
involved in the parenting if you're saying that women naturally yeah because you said that women
0.51
00:40:50.520
are no she's talking about i think you're talking about primary custody right no but like you said that
00:40:55.400
women are more likely to take off to the kids but then if you're a stepdad you're not gonna
1.00
00:40:59.240
as many of you know i was just banned on tick tock and we are demonetized on a daily basis on this
00:41:06.120
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