JustPearlyThings - She Defended Societal Standard On Divorce

00:00:00.000 That could happen for in marriages with husbands as well because to be divorced isn't such a bad thing on either on either side

00:00:08.400 Are you kidding? There's divorce parties women

00:00:10.800 No, no, I'm talking about for men. There isn't the consequences

00:00:15.200 When we're talking about shame okay to actually like be divorced okay on both sides the consequences are oh

00:00:21.120 I'm divorced and then carry on social stigma

00:00:25.120 I'm not talking about money this I'm talking about your social

00:00:28.080 Sorry, I thought you were talking about consequences. No, there isn't the social stigma that's being divorced for either side

00:00:35.760 So both parties can go on to

00:00:39.120 Be in other relations you're taking but I'm talking about no

00:00:42.640 What i'm saying is to stay together is optimum, but if you don't have the social stigmas

00:00:49.040 That's why there are more divorces

00:00:51.120 Why there wasn't before was because socially you would become a pariah if you're a woman you wouldn't be able to get married again

00:00:57.280 We don't have all of that happening now. That's why it's on the rise. It's not necessarily that it's just on women

00:01:03.440 It's also for men. Are you performing?

00:01:06.160 The way that you should be so that the marriage actually carries on if both people

00:01:10.480 In the marriage are not at an equilibrium that this is working. Why should a woman just stay in there?

00:01:17.760 The single parent the when you look at the single parent to gel pipeline is very real

00:01:22.400 So now you're not having these people stay together when you look at 75 of the people that end up in jail

00:01:28.480 They come from single parent households. So the facts are there to see that is very significant

00:01:32.640 So should both people not be penalized for working on their relationships or should it just be women?

00:01:37.760 But the money is just men because we gotta pay

00:01:40.240 No, it should be

00:01:41.760 The person that should be penalized is the one who chooses to leave which is mostly women

00:01:46.400 Yeah, I think both people if it wasn't working

00:01:50.480 Should literally be like we have to make you love to ignore the facts

00:01:54.560 Like just literally ignore the facts

00:01:57.200 I know what you're saying. Yeah, but the fact of the matter is yeah

00:01:59.920 The reason why more women are leaving now is because women have more money now than they've ever had

00:02:04.480 That's the only reason why they're leaving

00:02:06.880 So if they knew they wasn't getting that money from him on the divorce and they weren't getting a chance

00:02:11.040 But they weren't leaving i'm telling you staying your solution is that women should earn less money. No, that's not my solution

00:02:17.520 Okay, okay. No, no, no

00:02:20.320 He's saying that there is an incentive for women to leave because they get money women women have they own two-thirds of debt

00:02:28.240 Women women aren't in great financial places, but they get to be when they get making out that they are

00:02:33.280 No, no i'm saying they get to be in great financial places when they're getting a check from a dude for the rest for 18 years

00:02:41.040 Like what the relationship in a better state the richest the the richest women the richest women in the world got their money through divorce

00:02:47.040 But they're the richest women in the world because

00:02:51.600 They weren't the richest beforehand

00:02:53.600 They became because they were aligned with the richest man and then they

00:02:58.160 Even on average

00:03:00.160 Woman when she leave better than they came in. Yeah, so yeah before before you're married to me

00:03:04.080 You didn't have my assets and then when you're leaving you have half my assets now. Yeah, so you're in a better position

00:03:08.400 So it's like so the woman gets a prize basically for leaving

00:03:12.160 She gets free money every month and you also have to bear in mind if you look at the the changes between the sexes

00:03:18.160 Men have mostly stayed the same. Yeah, it's women that have changed your mind your mentality has changed

00:03:22.880 Obviously your financial well-being has changed a lot of the things that make you a woman has changed

00:03:27.520 So you're the ones that are driving this

00:03:30.240 This disparity between men. I absolutely agree with that

00:03:33.600 But what I would say is because the times are moving men need to actually adjust to this

00:03:39.040 We are adjusting

00:03:40.080 But they are adjusting they're not marrying you now

00:03:43.680 It's not people are still getting married all the time

00:03:50.720 50% of women over 30 are single and childless you see that we're adjusting women women are getting married at later and later ages than ever

00:03:57.520 So in the in the u.s. The average age of first marriage for a woman is um, either 27 or 28 in the uk. It's 31. Yeah

00:04:04.080 So men are marrying women

00:04:06.720 So we have all of these stats for women right men are also very disgruntled

00:04:12.640 Very feeling very alone

00:04:14.880 Angry not alone saying that

00:04:18.800 It's easier when you're busing it open more than ever

00:04:20.640 No, but I say this, but men are also

00:04:22.800 It's true

00:04:23.840 What did you say?

00:04:25.520 But I said you said that a lot of men are disgruntled

00:04:27.520 But really yo, this is probably the easiest time it's ever been as a man to get sex

00:04:32.400 For a small percentage of men

00:04:33.600 I know what you mean

00:04:34.240 But I mean in general

00:04:35.200 No, one out of three men are virgins or haven't had sex in a year

00:04:38.240 I understand that

00:04:39.440 But I'm saying they've got a better chance now than they've ever had

00:04:42.160 Because women are now open

00:04:43.520 No, that's not

00:04:44.240 You're not correct

00:04:45.200 You're not

00:04:45.520 That's incorrect

00:04:46.480 No, but what I'm saying is the stigma for sleeping around

00:04:49.360 Yeah, with women, yeah

00:04:50.720 Is not there now like it was before

00:04:52.720 That's what I'm saying

00:04:53.280 I'm not saying that men are still

00:04:55.280 I'm not saying men are getting more

00:04:56.880 I'm saying, yeah

00:04:57.600 That it will be easier now, yeah

00:04:59.120 You've got more of a chance now than you did before

00:05:01.280 When you needed a virgin wife

00:05:02.640 You ain't finding no virgin wife now

00:05:04.160 Most of the time

00:05:04.560 No, but I'm saying that's not correct

00:05:06.480 Like one out of three men under 30 are virgins or haven't had sex

00:05:09.120 I'm talking about women

00:05:10.080 I said virgin wife

00:05:11.200 Less men are having sex than ever

00:05:14.800 It's not easier to bust open the cheeks for most men

00:05:17.440 It's for the 20% of men

00:05:20.000 Yeah, it's easier than ever

00:05:21.440 They have their pick

00:05:22.720 Okay

00:05:23.040 Like for example, if you're over six foot as a guy

00:05:25.440 You're in the top 15% of men height-wise

00:05:28.800 Okay, I think where we're getting confused is

00:05:31.120 What I'm saying is

00:05:31.920 Obviously before, as a man

00:05:34.000 It was easier in the sense, yeah

00:05:35.520 That like more women were settling down with average men

00:05:38.640 So your average guy was getting more play

00:05:41.120 That's what I'm saying

00:05:41.760 But I'm talking about in terms of the stigma

00:05:43.440 In terms of sex

00:05:44.240 Oh, I see what you're saying

00:05:45.360 Women sleeping around, yeah

00:05:46.960 There's not the stigma there no more

00:05:48.320 Before they're like

00:05:48.800 Oh, I need a nice virgin wife and that

00:05:50.560 Now, man are wife in hoes

00:05:52.960 Do you know what I mean?

00:05:53.840 They weren't doing that before

00:05:54.880 They had to make sure that your thing was intact

00:05:56.800 Before man was thinking about marrying you

00:05:58.320 And now, do you know what I'm saying?

00:05:59.760 Man are running around wife in Boris bikes

00:06:01.920 Well, that's where it goes back to

00:06:03.120 There's no consequence

00:06:04.160 Yeah

00:06:04.400 You take away

00:06:04.800 We get birth control

00:06:05.920 Women can sleep with whoever

00:06:06.960 There's no consequence

00:06:07.840 That's it

00:06:08.400 And then on top of that

00:06:09.200 Even if they get pregnant

00:06:10.080 There's no consequence

00:06:10.880 They can have an abortion

00:06:11.840 And they don't know who their dad is

00:06:12.960 Man, them are raising kids

00:06:13.920 That ain't this

00:06:14.480 And that even if

00:06:15.840 Even if they get married

00:06:17.280 And they leave

00:06:18.240 There's no consequence

00:06:19.120 They get alimony

00:06:20.480 Or child

00:06:21.040 Even if they have a kid with the wrong guy

00:06:22.880 What do they get?

00:06:23.600 Child support

00:06:24.320 Even if there's homeless

00:06:25.280 There's women's shelters

00:06:26.080 The point is

00:06:27.120 That women face no consequences

00:06:29.360 There's always a cushion

00:06:31.040 For men

00:06:31.520 They're on the streets

00:06:32.400 Or they commit suicide

00:06:33.680 But there is a consequence

00:06:35.040 Because you are there

00:06:36.480 Bringing up a child

00:06:37.680 There is a consequence for leaving

00:06:39.360 Your time is spent now

00:06:40.960 Rearing another human being

00:06:42.160 It's not like you were running

00:06:43.920 Like you just left

00:06:45.040 And then you were getting money

00:06:46.080 No, you're a mother

00:06:46.880 But you would have had to do that

00:06:47.760 You have to do something

00:06:48.400 Yes

00:06:48.720 Yeah

00:06:49.520 But it's easier

00:06:50.560 Obviously it's easier

00:06:51.680 When you're in a pair

00:06:52.240 I don't want to leave

00:06:53.440 You force me to leave

00:06:54.800 Yeah

00:06:55.040 Or you leave

00:06:55.920 And you force me to be

00:06:56.880 Wifeless, divorced

00:06:58.160 And I have to pay you on top of that

00:06:59.760 And then I can't see my child

00:07:00.800 When I want to see my child

00:07:02.800 As well

00:07:03.760 Do you know what I'm saying?

00:07:04.400 And that isn't always the case as well

00:07:06.000 It's mostly the case

00:07:07.040 80% of the time

00:07:08.240 I heard you say it was easier

00:07:09.840 I heard you say it was easier

00:07:11.120 To do it with a co-parent

00:07:13.280 As such, right?

00:07:13.840 In a pair

00:07:14.960 She can just find another partner

00:07:17.440 Because it's that easy

00:07:18.880 As a single parent

00:07:20.560 To find another man

00:07:21.600 Maybe not one that you want

00:07:24.560 But to find another man

00:07:26.240 Yes

00:07:26.560 So again

00:07:27.040 You guys are saying

00:07:28.560 That women should settle

00:07:30.320 They should settle for

00:07:31.760 What they don't want

00:07:32.960 They should be earning less money

00:07:35.120 So that they are more dependent on men

00:07:36.800 We didn't say that

00:07:37.520 No

00:07:37.920 No, we didn't say that

00:07:38.320 You shouldn't be rewarded for that

00:07:39.680 If you want to leave that situation

00:07:41.040 Because of those reasons

00:07:41.840 My whole point is that

00:07:42.880 If you have bad behavior as a woman

00:07:44.720 There should be consequences

00:07:46.400 And as a society

00:07:47.280 We take them away from women

00:07:49.200 Okay

00:07:49.520 So if I'm the sole child

00:07:50.880 If I'm the primary carer

00:07:52.960 For the child

00:07:53.920 Or the children

00:07:54.800 In our relationship

00:07:56.000 And we are not working

00:07:57.200 We have a toxic environment

00:07:58.640 We're arguing all the time

00:08:00.000 We can't settle our differences

00:08:01.440 And I've decided

00:08:02.560 I can't do this

00:08:03.440 I don't think it's okay

00:08:04.400 And I'm gonna go for a divorce

00:08:05.760 And we get divorced

00:08:06.560 And we separate

00:08:07.200 Then you're selfish

00:08:08.640 And so

00:08:09.120 Yeah

00:08:09.360 I'm taking the children away

00:08:11.840 Because I don't want them

00:08:12.560 To be in a toxic relationship

00:08:14.160 That environment

00:08:15.680 And the dad shouldn't pay

00:08:17.840 Towards them in any way

00:08:19.200 No, you chose to leave

00:08:20.240 It's selfish

00:08:20.720 You broke up your home

00:08:21.760 Because you're not happy

00:08:22.800 And because you feel

00:08:23.520 Instead of figuring out

00:08:24.560 How to work it out

00:08:25.280 You're gonna leave

00:08:25.920 Break the home

00:08:26.400 Put your kid at every statistical

00:08:27.600 It's not one person

00:08:28.160 Put your kid at every statistical

00:08:29.760 Disadvantage

00:08:30.400 Because you can't figure out

00:08:31.280 How to work it out

00:08:32.240 You could also give the dad custody

00:08:33.920 You could also give the dad custody

00:08:35.040 If he's a better parent

00:08:37.120 If he's better equipped

00:08:38.240 But a lot of times

00:08:38.960 We see that

00:08:39.920 You know

00:08:40.480 Single dads

00:08:41.280 Raise children better than

00:08:42.400 Single women

00:08:43.520 So statistically

00:08:44.480 He would be the better parent

00:08:45.600 If he's equipped to do it

00:08:47.280 Yeah

00:08:47.440 There are loads of people

00:08:48.240 That don't want to

00:08:49.600 And yet straight away

00:08:51.440 We assume women

00:08:52.320 Inherently better

00:08:52.960 I agree with you on that

00:08:54.560 I think but there are also

00:08:55.840 Lots of men

00:08:56.640 That don't want to take on

00:08:58.880 The primary care of responsibility

00:09:01.120 And I think because

00:09:02.400 It generally falls onto the woman

00:09:04.960 To do that

00:09:05.840 I don't understand why

00:09:07.440 There would be men

00:09:08.320 That would be like

00:09:08.960 I'm not going to add

00:09:10.000 I'm not gonna add

00:09:11.040 The law set up for that

00:09:12.000 The law set up to give the woman

00:09:14.720 The win

00:09:15.200 When it comes to the child custody

00:09:16.640 Yeah

00:09:18.120 If the father is contesting it

00:09:21.040 Yeah

00:09:21.440 Once it goes to that

00:09:23.800 Yes that is definitely true

00:09:25.160 But even if he contests it

00:09:26.320 But there are loads of men

00:09:26.640 That don't even want to

00:09:27.720 To do joint custody

00:09:29.440 With their partners

00:09:30.520 If a man's getting

00:09:31.160 They are happy to do

00:09:31.960 Every other weekend

00:09:32.780 If a man's getting married

00:09:33.720 Chances are he wants to have children

00:09:35.440 And so the idea

00:09:37.240 That he wouldn't want to

00:09:38.020 Take care of those children

00:09:38.720 I think is just false

00:09:39.740 Because a lot of men

00:09:41.000 Actually complain that

00:09:41.580 They don't have a proper

00:09:42.780 Relationship with their children

00:09:43.400 Because they were working

00:09:44.120 Yeah I think

00:09:44.980 That's a great point

00:09:46.440 I think your argument

00:09:47.240 Of saying him being

00:09:47.860 The primary carer

00:09:49.100 Then yes

00:09:49.680 But in terms of co-parenting

00:09:50.880 I think most men

00:09:51.640 That get married

00:09:52.160 And have kids

00:09:52.760 Would like to co-parent 50-50

00:09:54.180 Yeah and the people

00:09:54.940 You're talking about

00:09:55.660 Are they actually married

00:09:56.480 Or are they just people

00:09:57.240 That ended up getting

00:09:58.200 Getting pregnant

00:09:59.260 By some guy

00:10:00.020 That she was sleeping with

00:10:00.980 And now all of a sudden

00:10:01.700 I didn't add in that

00:10:02.960 No but I'm saying

00:10:03.740 That's important

00:10:04.360 Because what they said is

00:10:05.360 If a man gets married

00:10:06.600 Most of the time

00:10:07.540 It's because he wants kids

00:10:08.220 Because if you don't want

00:10:09.240 Children as a man

00:10:09.880 There's no point in getting married

00:10:10.860 Why the hell would you do that

00:10:12.160 Having kids is the main point

00:10:12.860 I've been

00:10:13.180 If I get married

00:10:14.400 It will solely be

00:10:15.560 For my children

00:10:17.660 It won't be for no one else

00:10:18.820 It won't be for the woman

00:10:20.320 It won't be for me

00:10:20.980 But when that separates

00:10:21.320 But if that doesn't work out

00:10:23.560 And you separate

00:10:24.440 From the person

00:10:25.440 Would you not want to be involved

00:10:28.100 And actually financially

00:10:29.740 Providing for your child

00:10:31.380 Yep just like my dad did

00:10:33.020 My dad weren't paying child support

00:10:34.380 He bought everything for me

00:10:35.900 My school uniform

00:10:36.680 If I needed football boots

00:10:37.780 He paid for that

00:10:38.400 If I needed anything

00:10:39.340 And then he would give me money

00:10:40.740 Every weekend

00:10:41.620 To give my mum

00:10:42.640 To buy the food shopping

00:10:43.460 My dad paid for everything

00:10:44.600 But like my man

00:10:45.420 Didn't have to go through the courts

00:10:46.340 And talk about

00:10:46.860 You have to pay this amount

00:10:47.680 And that amount

00:10:48.120 If I needed anything

00:10:48.800 He paid for it

00:10:49.400 And I'll do the same thing

00:10:50.460 For my child

00:10:50.960 But I'm not giving you money

00:10:51.960 To go out with your brethren

00:10:52.900 And twerk bruv

00:10:54.120 I'm not doing that

00:10:54.780 If I'm financially

00:10:55.320 Financially reliable

00:10:56.660 For the child

00:10:57.180 There are certain rights

00:10:58.160 It should be given to me

00:10:58.720 And if you pick that woman

00:10:59.040 You should be held accountable

00:10:59.880 If I'm financially reliable

00:11:00.960 For a child

00:11:01.440 There are certain

00:11:02.120 Things that should be given to me

00:11:04.740 By the law

00:11:05.140 So I should have

00:11:06.440 A certain amount of hours

00:11:07.600 To see that child

00:11:08.180 If I'm paying for him

00:11:08.880 But that's not happening

00:11:09.700 Because if a woman has custody

00:11:11.680 She can say

00:11:12.120 No you're not seeing it

00:11:12.900 I agree with you

00:11:14.240 So my question is

00:11:15.200 How are men not held accountable

00:11:16.780 In this situation

00:11:17.620 Exactly the point

00:11:18.760 That he made out

00:11:19.500 That I'm not going to give her money

00:11:20.660 To go out to work in

00:11:21.740 On the weekend

00:11:22.600 If you have a child

00:11:23.940 With the woman

00:11:25.080 That is going to be the one

00:11:26.160 That's going out to work in

00:11:27.240 Take accountability

00:11:28.220 That you put your willy

00:11:29.280 In the wrong place

00:11:29.760 Okay okay

00:11:30.380 So he does

00:11:31.260 He is held accountable

00:11:33.480 Because now he does

00:11:34.580 Have a consequence

00:11:35.220 And that's it

00:11:35.680 So what is the woman's consequence

00:11:37.640 She has to be a mother

00:11:38.900 And bring up the child

00:11:39.540 No but she gets free money

00:11:40.780 Wait hold a minute

00:11:41.580 They're not free

00:11:42.720 Wait is a consequence

00:11:43.820 A kid

00:11:44.600 Bringing up a kid

00:11:45.440 For a woman

00:11:46.340 Because I thought

00:11:46.960 That's what she did

00:11:48.180 I thought women

00:11:48.600 Are maternal

00:11:49.520 So the idea of having a kid

00:11:51.480 Is something that

00:11:52.940 It should be treasured

00:11:54.080 Have a child

00:11:54.840 And let's talk about it

00:11:55.580 And also you chose

00:11:56.560 To have that child

00:11:57.520 Nobody just rang your doorbell

00:11:59.080 And said here you go

00:12:00.020 Either way

00:12:01.580 The whole point

00:12:02.660 Is that the women

00:12:03.400 Don't have a consequence

00:12:04.480 In this situation

00:12:05.400 Because they get child support

00:12:06.900 They get alimony

00:12:07.920 Money isn't the same

00:12:09.520 As bringing up the child

00:12:11.360 And they get custody

00:12:13.500 You're right

00:12:13.960 So and on top of that

00:12:14.980 The dude doesn't even

00:12:15.680 Get to see his kid as much

00:12:16.920 Well he should be

00:12:17.620 He should

00:12:18.080 But it's not

00:12:18.960 That's the whole point

00:12:20.160 And I'm not disagreeing

00:12:21.480 With you on that

00:12:22.040 I am like they should be

00:12:23.040 You're having a child anyway

00:12:23.240 Whether you get divorced or not

00:12:24.660 You're having a child

00:12:25.360 So you have to do all those things

00:12:26.340 Forget about the marriage thing

00:12:27.600 I'm talking about

00:12:28.200 Like two people

00:12:28.860 Just having a child together

00:12:29.860 If a woman's consequence

00:12:30.880 Is raising a child by herself

00:12:32.860 Is like saying

00:12:33.900 A man's consequence

00:12:34.700 For getting divorced

00:12:35.480 Is having to come home

00:12:36.480 From working

00:12:37.220 And he has to make food

00:12:38.560 For himself

00:12:39.060 How does that mean?

00:12:40.460 It's not even close

00:12:42.860 Because dreaming a child

00:12:44.620 Is very different

00:12:45.460 Than making a meal

00:12:46.240 Yeah but it's a choice

00:12:46.980 I'm saying that he's a choice

00:12:47.800 That he's a choice

00:12:47.820 That you made to have the child

00:12:48.700 But now he has to work and support himself

00:12:49.080 Through work

00:12:49.520 And that was a consequence of him

00:12:50.560 And then he's had a child out there

00:12:52.100 And he has to pay for the child

00:12:52.600 But if that man decided to get divorced

00:12:53.760 So if you guys are all saying

00:12:55.020 That men shouldn't be paying for their kids

00:12:56.980 Is that what you're saying?

00:12:57.840 No

00:12:57.980 It depends

00:12:58.620 I told you I'll pay for everything

00:13:00.640 He clearly said what men should be doing

00:13:02.140 I said I'll pay for everything

00:13:03.740 I said I'm not paying for you

00:13:04.860 To dutty wine though

00:13:05.720 I'm not doing that

00:13:06.580 I'm saying the man should be able

00:13:07.880 To pay for his kid

00:13:08.880 But I don't think the woman

00:13:09.820 Is entitled to his money

00:13:11.440 Just because

00:13:12.320 She got a kid off of him

00:13:13.860 And that incentivizes women

00:13:15.480 To have bad behavior

00:13:16.600 Like stealing a condom

00:13:17.900 And trying to get a kid off

00:13:19.140 But you're going into that

00:13:21.280 If the money is coming

00:13:22.700 Into the woman's account

00:13:23.920 That she is going to be using it badly

00:13:26.060 They often do

00:13:27.260 This is a common complaint

00:13:28.820 This is a common complaint

00:13:30.040 I hear from men

00:13:31.220 But how would they know?

00:13:33.380 Maybe

00:13:33.900 That's the solution

00:13:35.300 Okay

00:13:35.620 The accountability is

00:13:37.100 That you should know

00:13:38.160 Where your money is going

00:13:40.180 So wouldn't the man know

00:13:42.040 Where the money is going

00:13:42.940 If he spent it on the kid?

00:13:44.640 Yeah

00:13:44.880 Right

00:13:46.460 So shouldn't the man be able

00:13:48.340 To decide where his money goes?

00:13:50.500 And should he be able

00:13:51.140 He's going to do like the shopping

00:13:53.160 He's going to buy the clothes

00:13:55.100 He's going to pay for the school fees

00:13:56.560 Whatever it is

00:13:57.420 That the money

00:13:58.080 That would be going into

00:13:58.960 The woman's account

00:13:59.600 If he does that

00:14:01.200 There's online shopping

00:14:01.960 You know

00:14:02.280 Just send me the food shop

00:14:03.320 Send me the boots

00:14:04.000 Reimbursement

00:14:04.480 Reimbursement gang

00:14:06.160 I have no problems with that

00:14:08.060 Reimbursement gang

00:14:08.640 100%

00:14:09.320 Because then you live to your means

00:14:10.680 That way

00:14:11.120 Right

00:14:11.440 But I'm saying

00:14:11.860 Why is she entitled

00:14:12.820 To child support?

00:14:13.940 Why can't the man

00:14:14.580 Just spend the money on his own?

00:14:17.180 The child support

00:14:18.460 Should be

00:14:19.120 For the child

00:14:20.180 Yeah

00:14:20.580 And that should be how it is

00:14:22.340 However

00:14:22.760 Between the two of you

00:14:24.160 You go through your accountability

00:14:25.360 That you are going to pay for this

00:14:27.080 Or it's going to go into my account

00:14:29.020 And I'm paying for it this way

00:14:30.320 There should be child support

00:14:32.280 For the child to be supportive

00:14:33.980 Well shouldn't it just be

00:14:34.920 From either side

00:14:35.440 But shouldn't it just be 50-50

00:14:36.820 50-50 custody

00:14:38.160 And then 50-50

00:14:39.060 They pay when it's at the mom's house

00:14:40.340 In the best case scenario

00:14:41.140 I think that is exactly how it should be

00:14:43.740 It depends on the pay bracket

00:14:45.620 Exactly how it should be

00:14:46.660 But even with

00:14:47.360 Because if you broke up

00:14:48.240 And he was the higher earner

00:14:49.220 The 50-50

00:14:50.160 You might want to have

00:14:51.340 An elevator

00:14:52.360 But why are you entitled

00:14:53.440 To a better lifestyle?

00:14:54.700 No no I'm saying

00:14:55.140 For the child

00:14:55.780 But I'm saying

00:14:56.700 For the child

00:14:57.140 Say you're saying

00:14:57.780 The 50-50

00:14:58.580 When the child's there

00:15:00.020 With the mom

00:15:00.520 It should be paid for

00:15:01.240 Bro I know what you're saying

00:15:02.220 But then

00:15:02.700 I'll just be like

00:15:03.340 You know what bro

00:15:04.080 Mommy's broke fam

00:15:05.100 That's life

00:15:05.640 When you're here

00:15:07.560 It's live innit

00:15:08.940 When you go home

00:15:09.760 It's beans on toast

00:15:10.680 Yeah that's it

00:15:11.460 This is what it is

00:15:12.200 And then he's going to want

00:15:12.820 To stay with me

00:15:13.560 That's not a benefit

00:15:14.820 But that doesn't matter

00:15:16.200 The benefit would have been

00:15:17.080 Her not leaving

00:15:17.660 In the first place

00:15:18.420 But now you've left

00:15:19.360 Worry about what you're doing

00:15:20.920 You're punishing

00:15:21.400 You're punishing the woman

00:15:22.340 No no no no

00:15:23.740 I'm not punishing the child

00:15:26.460 Because the child

00:15:27.160 Can come stay with me

00:15:27.840 Whenever they want

00:15:28.480 I'm not punishing the child

00:15:29.920 Because your mom left me bro

00:15:31.020 Like it's not your fault

00:15:31.980 But you know

00:15:32.380 You always got a house here

00:15:33.300 So if you want to stay here

00:15:34.260 Five days

00:15:34.720 Daddy got five day money

00:15:35.920 It's not like

00:15:36.540 If you're poor

00:15:37.440 Like you're

00:15:38.260 What's wrong with that?

00:15:39.340 Yeah there's nothing

00:15:39.820 There's nothing wrong

00:15:40.600 With that evil

00:15:41.060 Yeah

00:15:41.440 I'm just saying

00:15:42.620 I think inadvertently

00:15:44.800 You may be punishing

00:15:46.180 Through punishing your wife

00:15:48.000 For like saying

00:15:48.820 Look I'm the better parent

00:15:50.220 You may punish the child

00:15:51.700 Exactly

00:15:52.200 In the way he sees his parent

00:15:53.800 The wife is inherently punished

00:15:55.060 But he will see his mother

00:15:57.480 As less than

00:15:58.560 His fault

00:15:59.360 And that's what I was on the scene

00:16:00.100 Because

00:16:00.500 No no no

00:16:02.000 Why would you put that on your kid?

00:16:03.920 Okay but then

00:16:04.780 She should get a job

00:16:05.740 Like the men have to

00:16:06.920 Go get it

00:16:07.480 You can work

00:16:08.420 That's true

00:16:09.220 Because this is what I'm saying though

00:16:10.020 Like the woman is

00:16:10.780 Inherently punishing the child

00:16:12.260 By divorcing them anyway

00:16:13.000 Yes

00:16:13.380 So if

00:16:14.300 There's two wrongs

00:16:15.820 Make a right

00:16:16.220 She's now in a situation

00:16:18.000 Where she can't afford

00:16:19.360 The same lifestyle

00:16:19.980 That her husband can

00:16:20.720 That's on her

00:16:21.660 Yeah

00:16:22.020 She's not entitled

00:16:22.940 To the lifestyle

00:16:23.440 So we're going to exasperate

00:16:24.660 The poor decision

00:16:25.280 Are we just going to

00:16:25.800 Keep that one

00:16:26.280 Yeah we can't be ignorant

00:16:27.440 We can't be ignorant

00:16:27.460 Of the effects

00:16:29.260 That's on the kids

00:16:29.720 Because we all know

00:16:30.720 The statistics of

00:16:31.780 What happens to children

00:16:32.800 When the nuclear family

00:16:35.160 Breaks down

00:16:35.660 So we can't be

00:16:37.160 Like egotistical

00:16:38.600 Ignorant of the facts

00:16:39.540 Of knowing the effect

00:16:40.480 It's going to have on the child

00:16:41.240 So we still need to maintain

00:16:42.360 The stability of the kids upbringing

00:16:43.880 Whilst doing what else

00:16:45.600 Needs to be done

00:16:46.220 I'm saying there should be

00:16:47.500 No incentive

00:16:48.540 For the woman to leave

00:16:49.820 None

00:16:50.320 Like none

00:16:51.660 But I'm saying

00:16:52.460 With child support

00:16:53.460 There is an incentive

00:16:54.680 Because that money

00:16:56.700 Can elevate the life

00:16:58.000 Her lifestyle

00:16:58.780 Why is she entitled

00:17:00.240 To his money

00:17:01.060 But correct me if I'm wrong

00:17:02.100 But the model

00:17:02.520 We were talking about now

00:17:03.700 Was if the man

00:17:04.740 Were to pay for

00:17:05.840 Even just for the child

00:17:07.040 The money

00:17:07.540 Let's assume that

00:17:08.360 The money is going to the child

00:17:09.560 While the child

00:17:11.120 Is living with the mom

00:17:11.920 You were saying

00:17:13.060 That he shouldn't pay

00:17:14.140 But I'm saying

00:17:14.640 If it is going to the child

00:17:15.920 While he's the child

00:17:16.840 With the parent

00:17:17.740 There shouldn't be

00:17:18.400 Because you're taking away

00:17:19.200 The consequence

00:17:19.740 Of the expensive cost

00:17:21.180 Of a child

00:17:21.720 For the woman

00:17:22.260 You're again

00:17:22.660 Making it easier

00:17:23.460 For her to leave

00:17:24.600 But you're trying to

00:17:25.380 She's left now

00:17:26.160 So I'm trying to benefit

00:17:26.900 My child

00:17:27.260 It should be a choice

00:17:28.020 She's already gone

00:17:28.300 She's already made

00:17:28.960 That bad decision

00:17:29.540 So then if the man

00:17:30.400 Wants to do that

00:17:31.120 He should be freely

00:17:32.200 Able to

00:17:32.740 If he wants

00:17:33.740 He shouldn't be legally

00:17:34.640 Forced

00:17:35.220 For her bad decision

00:17:36.560 I think most men

00:17:38.800 Want to take care

00:17:39.540 For their kids

00:17:40.280 And if it ends amicably

00:17:41.420 Most guys

00:17:42.180 They're going to do

00:17:43.120 What's best for the child

00:17:44.240 What I'm saying

00:17:45.080 Is there shouldn't be

00:17:45.580 A gun to his side

00:17:46.460 Saying you have to

00:17:47.700 Pay your baby mama

00:17:48.600 Who destroyed your home

00:17:49.740 Especially if he has access

00:17:51.120 Most of the time

00:17:51.840 When I hear guys

00:17:52.420 Ain't trying to pay no money

00:17:53.280 It's because

00:17:53.500 They can't see their kids

00:17:54.400 That's why

00:17:55.560 Do you know what I'm saying

00:17:56.460 I don't hear men

00:17:57.080 I don't hear men

00:17:57.100 That have their kids

00:17:57.600 All the time

00:17:57.980 Saying I ain't giving no money

00:17:59.000 Like I don't hear that

00:18:00.080 So if the guy's got that access

00:18:01.520 And he's got the 50% custody

00:18:03.420 I'm sure he won't mind

00:18:04.340 Handing over the bread

00:18:05.520 And also

00:18:06.420 If a man's making

00:18:07.240 A lot more than a woman

00:18:08.180 Yeah

00:18:08.500 Why is that not

00:18:10.180 Taken into account

00:18:10.960 Yeah

00:18:11.180 When they're doing custody

00:18:12.400 In the first place

00:18:13.020 Because you're talking

00:18:13.560 About the standard

00:18:14.720 As many of you know

00:18:15.740 I was just banned

00:18:16.980 On TikTok

00:18:17.880 And we are demonetized

00:18:19.600 On a daily basis

00:18:20.860 On this platform

00:18:22.300 If you want to help

00:18:23.980 Please consider

00:18:24.840 Sending a super thanks below

00:18:26.720 Every donation helps

00:18:28.500 And it helps make

00:18:29.320 What we do possible

JustPearlyThings - December 24, 2022

She Defended Societal Standard On Divorce

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