JustPearlyThings - March 16, 2023


She ENDED The Relationship to Find Another Woman


Episode Stats


Length

12 minutes

Words per minute

184.38107

Word count

2,276

Sentence count

264

Harmful content

Misogyny

11

sentences flagged

Hate speech

2

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, the lads talk about their past relationships and how they came to know they were bi. The lads also discuss what it's like to be in a relationship with someone who is bi and how to deal with it.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 A vegetarian.
00:00:02.460 We don't get together with a vegetarian.
00:00:04.920 Yeah.
00:00:05.800 I was thinking, would you go, if you met a guy and he was like, you're a perfect guy,
00:00:10.500 and he said, I'm a vegetarian.
00:00:13.360 It's not perfect.
00:00:14.460 Okay.
00:00:15.360 Just checking.
00:00:16.560 Just checking.
00:00:17.340 I had to throw that in there.
00:00:18.060 It's not perfect.
00:00:18.720 I thought I'd put a smile in your face.
00:00:21.380 You don't know why I asked, right?
00:00:22.800 Yeah, the carnivore diet.
00:00:24.260 Yeah.
00:00:27.720 Don't ask a young lady about dumping men. 0.97
00:00:30.440 How many relationships have you ended and why?
00:00:35.740 Maybe like three or four.
00:00:43.040 I think most of it is like, just not what I want, I guess.
00:00:50.840 Like, it's just not working.
00:00:52.660 Or they're just, I like when someone knows the difference.
00:00:56.740 Obviously, I like someone that isn't too serious all the time.
00:00:59.040 But I feel like knowing when to be serious is so important.
00:01:02.120 So that's like one of the big things for me.
00:01:04.620 And what about the other ones?
00:01:10.320 Yeah, just don't get along.
00:01:12.480 Or the one I actually ended up falling in love with someone else.
00:01:16.080 So, cut that off.
00:01:19.940 How did that start?
00:01:21.720 Was it someone you knew?
00:01:22.720 Like a guy friend?
00:01:24.000 Oh, no.
00:01:24.320 Actually, it was a girlfriend.
00:01:26.900 Yeah.
00:01:27.380 We just became friends.
00:01:31.160 Friendship.
00:01:32.260 Like, we got closer as friends.
00:01:33.900 And then, yeah.
00:01:37.920 I didn't expect that.
00:01:39.720 I was just speaking to say.
00:01:42.320 Everyone's saying that, right?
00:01:43.940 And then if you're saying that, I can see everybody like, I'm thinking, what the hell?
00:01:48.480 So I had to say it.
00:01:49.900 I was shocked.
00:01:51.440 Shocked?
00:01:52.040 Everyone always is.
00:01:52.880 I don't know why.
00:01:53.640 Like, what is it?
00:01:54.220 No, because it's the way, you know, we're all talking.
00:01:56.340 You just naturally expect.
00:01:57.800 Yeah, we just think about it.
00:01:58.920 You just naturally expect.
00:02:00.320 And then when you said it, I noticed that you could hear a pin drop and I thought.
00:02:06.000 Did he know you were bi?
00:02:07.820 I didn't know I was bi.
00:02:08.540 I was about to say she didn't know.
00:02:10.340 I was just thinking, like, he really didn't see.
00:02:12.540 He's like, I lost my girl to another girl.
00:02:15.420 I'd be pissed.
00:02:17.160 I'd be fuming.
00:02:17.980 I didn't see that coming.
00:02:19.620 Have you guys ever dated a guy and he turned out, he swung for the other team?
00:02:23.460 No.
00:02:24.700 Who said yes?
00:02:27.200 Yes.
00:02:28.440 How did you find out?
00:02:30.320 A couple people.
00:02:31.900 And let's just say the streets talk.
00:02:35.720 The streets talk.
00:02:37.020 You know everything.
00:02:39.000 Everything.
00:02:39.660 So you heard through the grapevine he was, like, hooking up with dudes?
00:02:42.980 That and I've seen, obviously, things myself.
00:02:46.880 Obviously, at first I was a bit suspicious and then, you know.
00:02:50.080 Did he have particular sexual positions?
00:02:52.080 I just want to put it out there nicely.
00:02:53.160 No, no, actually.
00:02:54.700 Anything.
00:02:55.520 I have to ask.
00:02:56.540 People out there, a lot of people are going to know.
00:02:58.740 I just want to ask.
00:02:59.620 Because you'd put it hanging in a minute.
00:03:02.040 They're more freakier.
00:03:03.860 They're much more freakier.
00:03:05.380 Oh, don't say that.
00:03:05.900 Much more dirty.
00:03:07.200 I just said, don't say dirty.
00:03:08.940 Don't say dirty.
00:03:09.840 Don't say dirty.
00:03:09.920 But I like that.
00:03:14.360 Okay.
00:03:15.740 Weirdly.
00:03:17.740 Would you go with somebody that, a bisexual person again? 1.00
00:03:21.200 Yeah, I would.
00:03:22.060 Okay, then.
00:03:22.700 I would.
00:03:23.420 Does it have to be male or female?
00:03:24.880 Both.
00:03:26.040 I sleep with girls as well. 1.00
00:03:27.380 Okay.
00:03:27.660 I'm not setting up no dates.
00:03:28.540 Out of the breakups, are there any breakups that you considered a win and why?
00:03:39.720 All of them.
00:03:41.120 All of them?
00:03:42.260 Yeah.
00:03:42.900 You always did better after.
00:03:46.460 Better.
00:03:47.280 Okay.
00:03:47.880 Yeah.
00:03:48.260 Yeah.
00:03:48.620 Yeah.
00:03:48.820 Were there any that you considered a loss?
00:03:54.620 One.
00:03:55.680 One?
00:03:56.360 Yeah, my baby dad probably.
00:03:58.500 Not him.
00:04:00.240 No.
00:04:01.520 Did he go on to date someone else?
00:04:03.940 No.
00:04:05.340 I think it's just in terms of, like, him as a man, probably, like, one of the best I'm going
00:04:12.940 to get.
00:04:13.900 So, now that that's not there, I think that's where I've kind of got a loss.
00:04:19.740 Do you think him being your baby dad influences that a lot more?
00:04:24.120 Influences what?
00:04:24.980 Just the fact that you feel like he was, like, the best you can get.
00:04:31.640 So, if you didn't have the kid, would you still feel the exact same way as you're feeling
00:04:34.280 right now?
00:04:34.720 Yeah, because I just feel like, in terms of the qualities that he has as a man, is it
00:04:40.640 too late for yous to?
00:04:41.620 Okay.
00:04:43.380 I don't know if he's watching it.
00:04:45.980 Be brave.
00:04:46.720 Go out there and say, I want you back.
00:04:48.420 We can make it work.
00:04:50.880 They say, Auntie Jenny will counsel.
00:04:52.320 Auntie, I'm giving too much idea.
00:04:53.820 Yeah, yeah.
00:04:54.480 Auntie Jenny is actually, Auntie Jenny is actually doing counseling now as a YouTube show.
00:04:59.380 So, if you want to bring him, we can.
00:05:00.720 Oh.
00:05:02.120 I think it can work.
00:05:03.420 I think that, you see, the difference is, right, when you have somebody like that and
00:05:07.500 you've got that same kind of feeling, what you need to go is go back and sit down and talk
00:05:11.380 about what went wrong, what you could have said.
00:05:14.480 And nine times out of ten, you find that as a woman, you need to apologize because you
00:05:18.020 didn't let him be a man.
00:05:19.440 And I can tell by your face that he was right and you was wrong.
00:05:21.880 That's why you're after him because you realize that you effed up.
00:05:23.780 You can see by your face.
00:05:29.080 Am I right or am I right?
00:05:31.340 I'd say like 80%, yeah.
00:05:32.740 Okay, then I can take that.
00:05:34.880 Pearl's impressive, but I'm going to do that a lot later.
00:05:37.940 It's all the meditation, you see.
00:05:41.420 So, if he wanted to get back with you tomorrow, would you do it?
00:05:44.800 I'm rooting for it.
00:05:46.220 I mean, it's not that I don't like him, but I just feel like there's certain things that,
00:05:51.540 because he's only, I'm 25, he's going to be 27 or 28.
00:05:57.680 So, he's not that much older than me, but I feel like in a lot of, in like 70% of ways,
00:06:04.160 he's so mature.
00:06:04.940 And then there's that 30% where he's just so immature.
00:06:07.280 I love him that.
00:06:08.000 That's the fun bit.
00:06:09.340 But are you immature at times?
00:06:12.620 You don't think you're ever immature?
00:06:14.560 He's not God.
00:06:15.500 You know what she needs to do? 1.00
00:06:18.360 She needs to think to herself, whatever he was serious, 100% of the time.
00:06:23.620 That's what you need to think.
00:06:25.220 If he was only 100% of the time, you wouldn't feel the same way now.
00:06:30.160 And you might not like it, you might not think so now,
00:06:32.320 but those fun bits were made in the whole person.
00:06:35.580 No, I do like it.
00:06:36.540 I just feel like there's a time and, like I said earlier,
00:06:39.000 there's a time and place when you need to be serious.
00:06:41.180 Maybe you just need to chill and go with it and have fun.
00:06:43.200 Maybe you're just too serious.
00:06:45.500 You know, maybe since you had the child,
00:06:47.020 you just got serious all of a sudden.
00:06:48.320 You just don't understand what's wrong with you.
00:06:49.520 You've got a child, you're just not old.
00:06:51.240 Do you want more kids?
00:06:52.780 Yeah, definitely.
00:06:53.700 With him.
00:06:54.940 I want to be mad if he was the dad,
00:06:56.860 but obviously I want to find, like, my right man and then...
00:07:01.460 That is your right man.
00:07:02.240 You're going to show it all over your face.
00:07:03.320 It's all over your face.
00:07:04.680 I don't understand.
00:07:06.140 Like, when we say the right...
00:07:07.000 You pick the right guy.
00:07:08.260 There's no, like, one person out there for you.
00:07:11.020 She just don't want to put in the hard work to make him perfect.
00:07:15.100 But isn't my responsibility to make you perfect, though?
00:07:17.680 Is it his responsibility to make you perfect?
00:07:20.240 No, I don't think it's any...
00:07:21.340 Either of my responsibility is to make me perfect.
00:07:23.640 Do you have a cookbook?
00:07:25.140 I mean...
00:07:26.180 With your own recipes that you've made yourself?
00:07:29.360 What do you mean?
00:07:30.380 You know what I mean.
00:07:31.300 I just said it.
00:07:33.480 It's okay.
00:07:34.460 No is okay.
00:07:35.720 You don't have to.
00:07:36.700 But I'm saying, like, if, you know,
00:07:39.020 if you're going to criticize and say it's my job to make him perfect,
00:07:41.560 it's like, am I perfect?
00:07:42.840 Yeah.
00:07:43.480 So I feel like it depends on who it is.
00:07:46.240 I feel like there comes with...
00:07:48.240 There's something...
00:07:49.240 In a relationship, when two people are immature
00:07:51.600 and you're aware of it,
00:07:52.840 there comes an established, like, thing where, like,
00:07:55.300 cool, we're going to be immature,
00:07:56.220 but we know when to...
00:07:57.040 Like you said, when to act right.
00:07:59.680 And it's also, like...
00:08:00.420 Who determines, like, what is the right time to act right?
00:08:04.140 Who determines that?
00:08:06.040 Both.
00:08:06.540 Both parties got to...
00:08:07.480 You have to be in a consensus for anything.
00:08:09.340 Right, but what if you disagree?
00:08:11.960 I feel like you can agree to disagree, too.
00:08:15.540 Right, but the whole point is
00:08:17.080 you may look at a situation
00:08:18.760 and see it as he needs to be serious now,
00:08:20.840 but he might think that he doesn't have to.
00:08:23.080 Then you talk it out
00:08:23.940 and you'll be like,
00:08:24.800 listen, I don't appreciate it.
00:08:25.980 But what I was actually trying to say
00:08:28.060 is I was trying to say that
00:08:29.340 certain people will be immature to you,
00:08:31.620 but if you're immature to them,
00:08:32.500 they can't take it.
00:08:34.160 So it's kind of like,
00:08:35.440 now you're stuck in a position
00:08:36.340 where you can't be immature,
00:08:37.660 and now every time they're immature,
00:08:39.380 it's kind of like,
00:08:40.220 this is not the right time.
00:08:41.500 See, that's why you don't play games in relationships.
00:08:44.120 See, that's what I was trying to get.
00:08:45.640 You can know.
00:08:46.580 Having fun and playing games is different.
00:08:49.460 He was having fun.
00:08:50.740 What you're describing as playing games.
00:08:52.880 There's a big difference
00:08:54.120 because he was just being himself.
00:08:57.400 And she knows he was just being himself.
00:08:59.520 So I'm in the foolish sometimes.
00:09:00.860 Let him have fun.
00:09:01.680 I'm sure that women are stupid sometimes, too, 1.00
00:09:03.380 and they lie at you.
00:09:04.580 Yeah, I agree.
00:09:05.000 I mean, I want to say I haven't been stupid at times,
00:09:09.280 but do you guys want to come back for therapy
00:09:11.240 with Auntie on Wednesday?
00:09:12.200 I actually do.
00:09:13.540 I beg, man.
00:09:17.040 We're creating a new therapy studio.
00:09:19.300 But they need to be able to handle the truth.
00:09:23.000 Tissues will be supplied.
00:09:27.140 What if they don't like your advice?
00:09:29.080 It's tough, isn't it?
00:09:29.920 It's tough.
00:09:32.560 You know what?
00:09:32.940 I'm always right, so I'm proven wrong.
00:09:36.400 So you want to prove me wrong?
00:09:37.740 Fair enough.
00:09:38.340 But I know that I can get you and your man working.
00:09:41.660 Yeah.
00:09:42.500 I might need you right now.
00:09:43.580 And get the next baby from me. 0.99
00:09:44.740 I'm so worried.
00:09:46.160 Yeah, yeah, we could do a couple episodes.
00:09:47.980 Yeah, I mean, yeah.
00:09:49.960 I want to see her on that block. 0.94
00:09:53.500 We always hear the women's side. 0.93
00:09:55.420 Let's hear the men's side.
00:09:56.720 Oh, I don't want him to talk on this side.
00:09:59.300 I think there's hope for them.
00:10:01.180 I think that once you just shut up and listen to him,
00:10:03.880 he'll tell her a few home truths.
00:10:05.840 You can bring the musician, too.
00:10:07.520 We can get you guys along.
00:10:09.900 No, I'm going to say this loud and clear.
00:10:12.980 He's sorry.
00:10:13.780 He's sorry.
00:10:14.360 No, no, never.
00:10:16.880 He changed our process.
00:10:18.320 He didn't need it.
00:10:19.380 No, still no.
00:10:21.540 Never.
00:10:23.100 Do you know what?
00:10:23.700 Not happening.
00:10:24.400 He's like, I'll play for everything.
00:10:26.060 No, no, no, no.
00:10:26.820 I think it's...
00:10:28.020 There's only a chance already.
00:10:28.540 Why not another one?
00:10:29.240 Oh, hell no.
00:10:30.880 Do you know the worst thing she could have done?
00:10:33.280 Why keep trying something?
00:10:34.980 Come on, time to move on.
00:10:35.760 Young lady, the worst thing you could have done 0.89
00:10:37.400 was go over his dream and encourage him to be a musician.
00:10:40.320 No, I still think that that was the right thing to do.
00:10:43.020 No, I mean, you thought it was the right thing to do.
00:10:45.700 I mean, but with hindsight, would you...
00:10:47.440 If he wasn't a musician, what else could he have been?
00:10:50.260 He was an architectural metal worker in the airports
00:10:53.840 and he was miserable and I wanted him to be happy.
00:10:56.400 Okay.
00:10:56.560 So, to be happy, he left his job and he took a risk
00:11:01.180 and I encouraged that.
00:11:02.520 Did it work out good for him financially?
00:11:04.800 Majorly so, yeah.
00:11:05.740 Oh, that's all right then.
00:11:06.700 We used our store friends and that's all right.
00:11:08.660 You ain't got no kids with both of you? 0.99
00:11:10.120 Yeah.
00:11:10.680 Oh, you have?
00:11:11.160 Well, that's all right then.
00:11:11.820 He's making money, you got kids and you're getting on.
00:11:14.500 That's great.
00:11:15.140 Yeah.
00:11:17.020 No arguments.
00:11:17.940 That's always good.
00:11:18.580 I really think we could do a double episode.
00:11:22.220 I really think we could just bring families together
00:11:24.180 in the therapy room.
00:11:26.680 Think about it.
00:11:27.460 Just not this one.
00:11:28.400 Not this one, still.
00:11:29.820 No, no, no, no.
00:11:31.240 He's sorry.
00:11:32.400 He's sorry.
00:11:33.060 Hell no.
00:11:33.940 No, no, never.
00:11:36.160 It's not happening.
00:11:37.380 Do you know what I'd really like to do?
00:11:39.160 I'd like to follow her
00:11:41.040 and I'd like to check out her style 1.00
00:11:44.760 because I reckon she's giving off the wrong...
00:11:48.580 I'd like to...
00:11:49.540 You know that with Wife Scott, 0.86
00:11:50.540 I'd like to make her over and see the difference.
00:11:53.160 This young lady here.
00:11:54.760 I think she's giving out all the wrong...
00:11:57.060 Signals.
00:11:57.740 Yeah.
00:11:58.160 That's it.
00:11:58.660 She's giving out the wrong signals.
00:11:59.800 And attracting the wrong people.
00:12:00.440 Yeah.
00:12:00.660 I think she's attracting the wrong type of person 0.99
00:12:02.660 because she's giving out the wrong signals.
00:12:04.500 As many of you know,
00:12:05.520 I was just banned on TikTok
00:12:07.560 and we are demonetized on a daily basis
00:12:10.540 on this platform.
00:12:12.420 If you want to help,
00:12:13.820 please consider sending a super thanks below.
00:12:16.900 Every donation helps
00:12:18.200 and it helps make what we do possible.