JustPearlyThings - November 13, 2023


She was too STUBBORN to Be SCHOOLED on What Men Want


Episode Stats

Length

38 minutes

Words per Minute

222.01228

Word Count

8,499

Sentence Count

1,008

Misogynist Sentences

83

Hate Speech Sentences

55


Summary


Transcript

00:00:00.000 called Sex at Dawn. And in this book, they were making a case basically for a polyamory and
00:00:06.960 polyamorous relationships, which I don't resonate with personally, but I was trying to convince
00:00:10.920 myself because everyone else seems to think that's a good idea except for me. So I thought,
00:00:14.220 well, I got to read this book. But at the end of the book, they had a very interesting fact
00:00:17.460 about the olfactory sense, right? Your nose, that actually we sniff each other out. A woman
00:00:23.640 can tell if a man will compliment her differences genetically. I've heard that. Yeah.
00:00:30.000 But a woman actually can't if she's taking birth control. It's disabled. But a man can actually
00:00:37.060 sniff her out. He can genetically identify through his olfactory sense, through his nose,
00:00:43.240 whether or not she'll compliment his genetic weaknesses. So how does he know? What does
00:00:47.640 he have to smell for? I don't know. That's a good question. I wish I knew. But apparently it's like
00:00:52.160 a deep, very primal thing about attraction. So maybe make sure she's not on birth control.
00:00:57.260 Yes, for example. Not on birth control. I think that works both ways.
00:01:02.360 I wonder what percent. Hold on. I just want to look up because I'm curious. What percent of women
00:01:08.560 are on birth control? Also, who here is on birth control? Raise your hand. No one?
00:01:14.060 Not anymore. I mean, clearly one out of three are having abortions. I'm like, it can't be that high.
00:01:18.600 Okay. The majority, oh, 90% of women have used contraceptives throughout their reproductive years
00:01:27.940 and have used more than one in their lifetime. 76%. Wow. Okay. We just have a good room,
00:01:34.560 I guess. I'm going to add that to my stats. Okay. Sorry. Can I just add one more thing that came
00:01:40.760 to my mind? Ask her about the family. You know, sometimes I do understand that not all of the
00:01:46.700 parents can stay together. Of course, there are special situations, but just see how she talks
00:01:53.920 about her family. What is her relationship like with her family? And her dad, too, you know?
00:01:59.760 So if a girl, even if a girl is not on good terms with her dad, but she disrespects him by talking trash
00:02:08.940 to a guy, that's not a girl that you should marry, honestly. And if I don't think you can disagree
00:02:15.380 with this because there's no... But even if you haven't got a great relationship with your,
00:02:20.740 or your father's absent, it doesn't mean that the woman is going to be a wreck. It's not necessarily
00:02:26.540 true. No, no, I'm not saying that. I'm saying she shouldn't trash him.
00:02:29.560 Well, yeah, but why do we have the phrase daddy issues if it doesn't mean anything?
00:02:34.140 But some, most people, well, not, okay. A lot of people that have daddy issues, and we don't know
00:02:38.600 who they are. I'm one of them, but I'm not a disrespectful person to men. Like, I'm not.
00:02:42.220 Well, yeah, we're not talking about you, but in general, like... It's your dad, no matter what.
00:02:46.680 Like, I think if you've never, if you've never seen a healthy relationship, how would you know how to do it?
00:02:51.060 Exactly. Like, if I've never seen anyone ride a bike, how would I learn to ride a bike?
00:02:54.600 I feel like it's common sense. I feel like it's, like, morality.
00:02:58.380 If it was common, then why do half of relationships end in divorce?
00:03:02.260 And why is the older generation known for being so unhappy in their marriages?
00:03:05.760 Because men pick women based off the surface. They don't actually get to find a deeper meaning to why...
00:03:12.300 If women swipe right on dating apps, which is the most superficial, only 5% of the time,
00:03:16.440 and men swipe right 50% of the time, who's more superficial? Men or women?
00:03:20.260 Women.
00:03:21.060 But most women are hoes.
00:03:22.580 For real. No, for real, for real.
00:03:24.000 They are.
00:03:25.080 No, that's incorrect. One out of three men are either virgins or haven't had sex in the past year.
00:03:29.300 I feel like I'm not willing to sleep around.
00:03:30.720 One out of three men are either virgins or haven't had sex in the past year.
00:03:34.240 Wow.
00:03:34.940 I think a lot of women sleep around and...
00:03:37.260 So, I'll tell you. A lot of women do sleep around.
00:03:39.580 I do think that, so...
00:03:41.260 So, you're saying we're the same set of men?
00:03:42.260 Yeah, so it's, like, 20% of men are fucking all the girls, essentially, in their 20s.
00:03:46.100 And then when women hit 30, they'll expand it.
00:03:48.540 Like, basically, like, women typically go for looks in their 20s.
00:03:52.000 Women pick, like, when women...
00:03:53.260 This is the first time in history where women have been the sexual selectors.
00:03:56.960 So, like, pick... Historically, think about it. You had to get along with the dude or you die.
00:04:01.320 Like, they would pick you. You wouldn't pick them.
00:04:03.800 But now, this is the first time where women have been 100% in control of reproduction because we have birth control.
00:04:08.660 We're in control of abortion.
00:04:10.060 So, we are 100% in control of who's born.
00:04:12.240 And it's funny because the more freedom women get, the more we screw the same people in our prime, which is, like, 22 to 24.
00:04:18.640 They surveyed men between, like, 20 and 80.
00:04:20.880 And they said, when do you find women most attractive?
00:04:22.840 It's, like, roughly 22 to 24.
00:04:24.500 All the ages think that.
00:04:25.880 So, when women have the most choice, it's interesting because we pick non-monogamy.
00:04:31.120 And we tend to go for looks.
00:04:33.920 And women react out of emotion.
00:04:35.840 Yeah.
00:04:36.120 Solely out of emotion a lot of the time.
00:04:37.800 Which is why you see so many women sleeping with so many men.
00:04:41.400 And making decisions on the spot that aren't responsible, like abortion.
00:04:45.500 Yeah.
00:04:45.720 So, if the majority of women are going for men that's not monogamous, then why do they fight for a man to be monogamous?
00:04:51.580 I mean, I think they want him to be, but...
00:04:53.620 So, they want to change the man, basically.
00:04:55.460 They see a man, obviously, because they're going for the top 20% or whatever, which they know is, they can tell that he gets a lot of girls or whatever.
00:05:03.200 Yeah.
00:05:03.880 So, they want to try and lock down that one man so you don't...
00:05:06.400 Yeah.
00:05:06.960 Okay.
00:05:07.260 I mean, I think that's like every girl's, you know...
00:05:10.080 The dream.
00:05:10.440 ...has a, you know, what Cinderella was sitting at home and the prince like came and picked her out of all the princesses.
00:05:16.420 Exactly.
00:05:17.140 They want to say I was the one who changed him.
00:05:19.900 They've been selling us this dream forever.
00:05:21.880 Exactly.
00:05:23.400 Exactly.
00:05:23.680 So, what do you think of that?
00:05:27.220 Does that change your perspective a little bit?
00:05:31.040 Not really.
00:05:31.680 Kind of.
00:05:32.060 Not really.
00:05:32.540 No.
00:05:32.880 Okay.
00:05:33.100 Why?
00:05:33.580 What does it not change?
00:05:34.920 I just still think that men are looking for things they don't have themselves.
00:05:42.060 They don't have the minerals for the things that they want in the women, so they just pick women based off looks.
00:05:46.420 They don't know what they want, anyway.
00:05:47.640 They think they know what they want, but they haven't even got the minerals, anyway.
00:05:50.900 Is it possible that women don't have what they want?
00:05:53.580 Absolutely.
00:05:54.480 Right.
00:05:55.160 Absolutely.
00:05:55.440 So, how would they pick it if the dating pool has, like, one out of every three women's had an abortion, one out of every three women has an STD, like, 38, 40% grew up without a dad, so they don't have that model.
00:06:06.880 Like, how would they...
00:06:08.440 How would they know who a good woman is?
00:06:11.100 Yeah.
00:06:11.400 Like, they've never...
00:06:12.460 Like, what percent of men have, like, even seen a true traditional woman?
00:06:15.700 I don't think...
00:06:16.220 Yeah.
00:06:16.440 Do you know any women with, like, recipe books?
00:06:20.000 Only the high...
00:06:21.540 Only celebrities.
00:06:22.640 Nice, nice, too.
00:06:23.740 But only, like, the upper class, high celebrity profile people.
00:06:27.300 Yeah, and these two now.
00:06:28.940 Okay.
00:06:29.380 My whole...
00:06:30.260 And my whole family.
00:06:31.740 And then when I go there, they're like, oh, so modern, you know?
00:06:35.580 Everyone still cooks the same meals and...
00:06:39.480 But, so I'm just curious, like, when you're hearing these stats, like, assuming I'm telling you the truth,
00:06:44.180 you don't think, like, it puts more of the promiscuity on women, because we're only sleeping with 20% of men.
00:06:50.280 Mm-hmm.
00:06:50.860 So, like, that means 80% of us are sleeping with 20% of men.
00:06:54.060 Wow.
00:06:57.160 Hmm.
00:06:57.720 That's tech here.
00:06:59.100 Like, okay, I'll give you an example.
00:07:00.380 How tall was your last boyfriend?
00:07:02.960 6'1".
00:07:03.700 Okay, what percent of men do you think are 6'1"?
00:07:05.740 Maybe, like...
00:07:10.020 It's not...
00:07:10.820 It's not...
00:07:11.260 30%?
00:07:12.940 10.
00:07:13.680 10%.
00:07:14.320 10%.
00:07:14.820 10%.
00:07:15.120 So, you had a top...
00:07:16.920 How much money did he make?
00:07:18.760 Well, he had his own houses and a business.
00:07:20.880 He sells cars.
00:07:21.660 Okay.
00:07:22.480 So, roughly, how much do you think he made?
00:07:25.480 I didn't...
00:07:26.320 She don't know that.
00:07:27.120 Yeah, I'm not one to...
00:07:28.560 The man ain't telling you that?
00:07:29.680 Yeah.
00:07:30.400 But he owned a house.
00:07:31.020 But I know about his business and, you know, and things like that.
00:07:33.520 But I don't know the figures.
00:07:34.860 In London?
00:07:35.760 In Essex.
00:07:36.660 Oh, in Essex.
00:07:37.220 Yeah, okay, so if he owned a house, he probably made at least, like, 60, 70, I guess.
00:07:42.660 Who knows?
00:07:43.000 He had a nice range.
00:07:43.820 Okay, so he's probably...
00:07:45.620 I'm guessing, right?
00:07:46.540 I don't actually know.
00:07:47.660 You guys would know London prices more than me.
00:07:49.700 But he's probably still top 20% of income.
00:07:52.140 Probably, because buying a house in Essex is cheap.
00:07:55.000 Yeah, okay.
00:07:56.040 So, top 20%.
00:07:57.080 So, you had a guy top 10% height, top 20% income.
00:08:00.840 Was he attractive?
00:08:01.940 Was he good looking?
00:08:02.500 Yeah, he was, yeah.
00:08:03.240 So, in women...
00:08:04.360 So, you know, women, we find 80% of men is ugly.
00:08:07.220 So, if you find him attractive, that means he's top 20%.
00:08:10.240 Right.
00:08:10.940 You should call him.
00:08:12.080 Is he still single?
00:08:12.640 No, he's been trying to holler at me, to be honest.
00:08:14.420 I'm going to have to block him.
00:08:16.120 Girl, you should.
00:08:16.840 So, what? Why not...
00:08:17.440 Because he's not the one for me.
00:08:19.540 What is the one?
00:08:20.660 So, it seems like he has a good job.
00:08:22.060 He's not the one for me.
00:08:22.860 He's attractive and tall.
00:08:24.000 It doesn't matter.
00:08:24.640 His personal...
00:08:25.240 I think that's the daddy issue that happened.
00:08:26.660 No, no, no, it's not.
00:08:27.580 I'm very smart, trust me.
00:08:28.740 Like, he was wearing a mask when we first met.
00:08:31.440 And then his true colours came out.
00:08:32.900 And I saw in certain behaviours that he was portraying.
00:08:35.440 What true colours?
00:08:36.820 So, like, you know, he was very aggressive sometimes.
00:08:39.760 And he...
00:08:40.760 I felt like his...
00:08:42.080 What do you mean aggressive?
00:08:42.960 Did he hit you?
00:08:44.460 No, he didn't hit me, no.
00:08:45.860 Okay, so he didn't hit you.
00:08:46.460 Well, he pushed me.
00:08:47.720 He shoved me very hard.
00:08:49.100 And it was for a very pathetic reason.
00:08:51.040 And he's a liar.
00:08:51.780 Did you shove him at all?
00:08:52.920 No.
00:08:53.300 Or he was just one-sided?
00:08:54.020 No, I don't like to be aggressive.
00:08:55.100 I don't believe in that shit anymore.
00:08:56.420 I've grown up, you know?
00:08:57.400 Okay, so he shoved you one time and then you died.
00:08:59.680 And it was very...
00:09:00.400 And it was petty.
00:09:01.000 And he lied at the time as well.
00:09:02.220 And I knew he was lying about picking up his kids when he wasn't...
00:09:05.580 He changed his story.
00:09:07.120 Like, I'm very observant when people speak.
00:09:08.600 He lied about picking up his kids?
00:09:09.680 So I spent a couple days with him.
00:09:11.260 And I was supposed to stay the last day.
00:09:12.920 And then all of a sudden, he's got to go and pick up his kids.
00:09:15.240 But you're lying.
00:09:16.400 And so it's like, you're making me feel like you don't want me to stay anymore.
00:09:20.560 So...
00:09:21.080 And then that happened.
00:09:21.980 Then we broke up.
00:09:22.760 And now he wants me back.
00:09:24.240 How do you know he wasn't picking up his kids?
00:09:25.500 I know he wasn't because his story changed.
00:09:27.160 He told me something.
00:09:27.820 We planned something from the get-go.
00:09:30.040 So you don't have no physical evidence of that?
00:09:33.460 I do.
00:09:34.300 I do.
00:09:35.180 It's very technical.
00:09:36.820 But you'd think I'm crazy if I go into it right now.
00:09:38.820 So how did the shoving happen?
00:09:40.240 Like, what led up to that?
00:09:41.640 Because he wanted me to leave.
00:09:43.020 Okay, so you...
00:09:43.700 Literally.
00:09:44.000 And he tried to drag me for roll for roll.
00:09:46.500 Okay, so were you refusing to leave?
00:09:48.520 Yeah.
00:09:49.080 Because I was in my feelings.
00:09:50.580 Because I knew he was lying.
00:09:51.940 Like, come on.
00:09:52.580 Okay, okay.
00:09:53.360 But you kind of framed this.
00:09:55.540 Yeah.
00:09:55.620 You kind of embarrassed this.
00:09:57.720 Why do a lot of women, they accuse a man of being, like, the bad guy.
00:10:01.620 The guy that hurts them.
00:10:02.560 The guy that beats them.
00:10:03.680 But then the reason they made...
00:10:05.660 They caused the reason.
00:10:06.560 Because if you physically don't move in certain spaces...
00:10:08.880 No, sorry.
00:10:10.060 It's the way you speak to someone.
00:10:12.360 It's the way you conduct yourself in that situation.
00:10:14.140 But if you're in...
00:10:14.860 This has happened to me before.
00:10:16.280 I bet.
00:10:17.100 Esther.
00:10:19.460 You know, you know.
00:10:20.320 No, there was a girl here.
00:10:22.460 And I asked her to leave.
00:10:24.000 And she didn't like the way I asked her to leave.
00:10:25.940 Right.
00:10:26.440 And then she starts yelling at me.
00:10:28.880 And then...
00:10:29.960 Well, we didn't have security then.
00:10:31.740 But my security would have just picked her up and taken her out.
00:10:34.540 But then it's like, the way you're saying this.
00:10:36.420 It's like, what are their options?
00:10:37.440 I wouldn't have done that.
00:10:38.840 How did you say that?
00:10:39.220 See, the thing, I wouldn't have done that.
00:10:40.300 But when it's an emotional, sexual connection, you've got other feelings.
00:10:43.380 Like, you feel rejection.
00:10:44.560 You feel like you're being violated.
00:10:45.900 It's just feels...
00:10:46.500 It's kind of different.
00:10:47.260 So you're kind of making yourself...
00:10:49.900 So basically, like, you were kind of overbearing because you thought he did something and you had no proof he did it.
00:10:56.040 No, I did because he changed his story.
00:10:59.140 But you've never said two things that contradicted yourself ever.
00:11:02.400 I have.
00:11:03.980 It just happens when you talk.
00:11:05.520 You know, it's very easy to say the wrong thing if you've been cross-examined.
00:11:10.820 Because you know what?
00:11:11.380 When you say earlier on where men are analyzing women and women are analyzing men, he's looking at you like, rah.
00:11:16.780 So you're going to argue against me picking up my kids.
00:11:19.660 But I knew he wasn't.
00:11:20.740 It doesn't matter whether you know he's not all eight years, yeah?
00:11:23.960 In his head, rah, hold on.
00:11:26.380 I'm telling you something about my kids and you're arguing against my kids.
00:11:30.400 To him, the kids are the main priority.
00:11:32.540 But even so...
00:11:33.420 Does he have a right to privacy?
00:11:35.780 Of course.
00:11:36.560 I'm not a possessive person.
00:11:37.900 Maybe there was something that he just didn't want you to know.
00:11:40.120 Maybe he was private with the mud.
00:11:41.860 Like, you know, I mean, like, baby mama situations can be tricky.
00:11:45.540 Like, sometimes guys don't want to get you in on all the drama.
00:11:48.820 But it's like, you're going into it in bad faith, so you're assuming the worst.
00:11:52.460 When maybe it wasn't the worst.
00:11:53.940 But I also feel like it's just the way you conduct yourself in a sensitive situation as well.
00:11:58.080 Like, I just feel like...
00:11:58.820 But couldn't we say that to you, though?
00:12:00.780 Because it's the way, like, you didn't listen when he said leave.
00:12:03.040 So it's kind of like, as women, like, we kind of have this double standard where we make him the bad guy when it's like, you kind of started it.
00:12:09.280 But then, oh, yeah, I remember now.
00:12:10.680 Also, the reason was, like, I've stayed in the house by myself before.
00:12:13.580 And at this point, he, like, he didn't want me to stay.
00:12:15.520 So it's like, if you love me, why can't I stay here while you go and pick up your child, do what you need to do, and I'll stay here tonight and you come back.
00:12:21.540 Because that's entitlement.
00:12:24.160 It's not your house.
00:12:25.220 Like, if I own this apartment, if I want anyone to leave at any time,
00:12:32.120 I have the right to do that.
00:12:34.400 Absolutely.
00:12:35.040 But that wasn't the issue.
00:12:36.340 Honestly, I didn't have an issue with that.
00:12:37.700 It was just the way it happened and the things that he was saying and the way he was speaking to me.
00:12:41.120 It's kind of like...
00:12:41.640 But this is, like, a lot of problems with women in relationships.
00:12:44.140 We want men to emote like women.
00:12:46.240 But he's not a woman.
00:12:47.320 He's a man.
00:12:47.960 Men don't speak like women do.
00:12:49.440 Like, they're much more stern.
00:12:51.080 And so a lot of times, like, we think something's aggressive, but men are just more aggressive than women.
00:12:55.680 You might want to call him.
00:12:56.840 But we're not aggressive.
00:12:57.300 He seems like a hard man to replace.
00:12:59.040 Can we just say that?
00:12:59.880 And say sorry.
00:13:00.440 And you said in the beginning that the men that like you, you don't want.
00:13:04.300 So that means the men you want don't want you.
00:13:06.320 Wow.
00:13:06.700 I haven't met the one, I think.
00:13:07.720 No, but that's like...
00:13:08.360 That's what...
00:13:08.760 Any girl that's single, it just means the men you want don't want you.
00:13:11.740 And it's not meant to be offensive.
00:13:12.720 The thing is, it's actually crazy because there's no one I actually want.
00:13:16.320 Apart from...
00:13:17.040 There's...
00:13:17.340 Okay, but...
00:13:17.920 Okay, come on.
00:13:18.860 There's nobody in the world that you'd want.
00:13:20.740 I'm attracted to, like, someone, but he's...
00:13:22.660 But he's like a celebrity figure.
00:13:24.780 You know, like, sex appeal.
00:13:26.020 But there's no one I actually want.
00:13:27.260 Okay, do you think you're on, like, the level of a celebrity?
00:13:30.220 Yeah.
00:13:31.720 You're not on the level of a celebrity.
00:13:33.540 I think I am.
00:13:34.920 I think I am.
00:13:36.520 I think I am.
00:13:37.240 I think I am.
00:13:37.500 I think I'm...
00:13:38.480 No, you're a pretty girl.
00:13:39.460 I think I'm an amazing person if I'm being honest.
00:13:42.520 Celebrity's like top 10, 20% of beauty.
00:13:45.160 Like, that's...
00:13:45.500 Yeah, but remember, I think I'm beautiful.
00:13:46.980 I think I'm beautiful without the Botox, without the money, without all that money to do myself up.
00:13:52.320 So I think I'm great.
00:13:53.300 I know, this is like a cope I see women do.
00:13:55.900 Like, it's like, you think because they have money, they're beautiful when they got there.
00:14:00.960 Money helped.
00:14:01.680 But if you look at Margot Robbie before Fame, that girl was a 10.
00:14:04.540 I don't know who that is.
00:14:05.420 But then you're doing selectiveness because there's enough girls that go there and the money blows them up only.
00:14:10.360 I disagree.
00:14:11.260 Not the girls that get there for looks alone.
00:14:13.480 Top 20% of beauty.
00:14:15.100 You can look at exceptions like that.
00:14:17.440 Like Kylie Jenner.
00:14:19.160 She's not beautiful.
00:14:21.080 She wasn't beautiful before.
00:14:22.620 She was cute, but yeah.
00:14:23.800 I mean, she wasn't that beautiful.
00:14:24.940 No.
00:14:25.120 Unless she gets fixed up.
00:14:25.760 She wasn't.
00:14:26.060 But like, I'm just saying, in general, guys.
00:14:28.380 Like, can we just talk in general instead of exceptions?
00:14:30.620 Most celebrities are top 20% of beauty in general.
00:14:34.000 Like, we could talk about...
00:14:35.360 There's some exceptions.
00:14:36.640 Like, Kylie Jenner did her lips, whatever.
00:14:38.140 But most people in Hollywood were the top 20% of beauty, wherever they're from.
00:14:43.880 I still don't agree, but yeah.
00:14:45.320 Okay, I feel you.
00:14:46.180 I feel you.
00:14:47.740 I don't know.
00:14:48.240 Maybe you should call him.
00:14:49.260 No.
00:14:50.020 Definitely not.
00:14:50.740 He might.
00:14:51.480 He might.
00:14:52.120 Oh, I'm an apology.
00:14:53.280 I don't know.
00:14:53.840 No, I have.
00:14:54.240 We had a closure, but he's not the one for me.
00:14:57.000 He's not my soulmate.
00:14:58.300 What's the definition of the one?
00:14:59.780 I just feel like there's a difference in behavior.
00:15:02.700 And the way you feel as well.
00:15:04.340 I'm not a possessive person.
00:15:05.860 I can accept.
00:15:06.560 I really like my independence.
00:15:07.640 But I just know there's a certain way that you will handle someone in those situations.
00:15:12.600 Are you your only child?
00:15:13.080 That just wasn't...
00:15:14.040 I'm not...
00:15:14.340 No, I've got...
00:15:14.860 You know what it is, though?
00:15:15.800 You know what it is?
00:15:16.220 Sorry, I just know within myself.
00:15:17.760 Sorry, are you your only child?
00:15:19.020 No, I've got brother and sister.
00:15:19.960 Are you the youngest?
00:15:20.880 I'm in the middle.
00:15:22.100 Oh, okay.
00:15:23.140 So, grow...
00:15:23.960 No, go on.
00:15:25.020 It's fine.
00:15:25.480 So, growing up, did your mum have a partner?
00:15:28.620 Did you have a stepdad around?
00:15:29.780 None.
00:15:29.960 Yeah.
00:15:30.440 Yeah.
00:15:30.900 Like, no, but not permanently.
00:15:32.840 So, in terms of looking up...
00:15:35.740 Do you know how to look after a man?
00:15:37.140 Of course.
00:15:37.640 No, because you're saying certain things that in a relationship, it's like...
00:15:41.920 If you saw a relationship with your mum and dad growing up, then there's certain things
00:15:45.600 you wouldn't do in a relationship, do you get what I'm saying?
00:15:48.040 To keep the man.
00:15:48.700 Listen, every man that's been my boyfriend has returned, and they haven't found better.
00:15:56.180 No, it's not.
00:15:56.680 It's definitely not.
00:15:57.420 Sorry.
00:15:58.500 It's definitely not.
00:15:59.480 Have you ever been married?
00:15:59.540 You've proposed to you?
00:16:00.240 Yeah.
00:16:01.140 You've been proposed to you?
00:16:02.380 Well, not like on one knee.
00:16:04.880 I haven't had that experience yet, but I've had similar.
00:16:07.080 You bought your rent?
00:16:07.620 Yes.
00:16:08.040 Oh, promising.
00:16:08.560 I've had similar, but not like that.
00:16:10.080 It was young, so...
00:16:11.100 Promising?
00:16:12.080 Basically, kind of like that.
00:16:13.100 Do you know what I mean?
00:16:13.920 You promised.
00:16:14.700 Okay.
00:16:15.160 It is what...
00:16:15.920 It's the same thing.
00:16:16.700 It's rare for a man to do that.
00:16:18.360 Promise rings don't count.
00:16:19.540 No, it does, because it's rare, because...
00:16:20.780 That does not count.
00:16:21.300 Do you think that men go out and buy promise rings?
00:16:23.940 It's just a line with a gift.
00:16:25.080 I'll be honest.
00:16:26.420 Girl, I've had one.
00:16:27.460 It's not that big.
00:16:28.280 All right, pal, pal, let me have...
00:16:29.960 But he hasn't really liked you to be, because he's not going to do that to everyone.
00:16:32.940 No, no, I'm not going to lie.
00:16:33.980 Man will buy promise rings still.
00:16:35.120 It's never going to happen.
00:16:36.820 It doesn't count.
00:16:37.800 You need a wedding date.
00:16:38.840 Yeah, hundreds.
00:16:39.680 A wedding date, not a little ring.
00:16:42.180 But I was young anyway.
00:16:43.140 No, okay, so it wasn't a real proposal.
00:16:46.480 No, no, no.
00:16:47.280 No, no.
00:16:47.400 Okay, so the whole point is, like, you're counting things that don't count.
00:16:50.980 It doesn't count if they don't want to marry you.
00:16:52.880 No, I feel you.
00:16:53.620 Well, they do.
00:16:54.360 The intention is to, you know.
00:16:55.200 No, no, but, like, men say things.
00:16:56.760 When they mean it, they do it.
00:16:58.400 Like, you can't count it, like...
00:17:01.160 I know what you mean, but, you know, shit happens.
00:17:03.600 You know, I've had guys say, I want to marry you.
00:17:05.720 It doesn't count unless he goes by, buys a ring, asks my dad.
00:17:09.180 This is...
00:17:09.700 We can't, like...
00:17:10.840 Like, I don't know why as women we count things that don't count.
00:17:13.220 You know it don't count.
00:17:13.960 So, wait, perl, you've been proposed to a couple of times, or...
00:17:16.320 A couple of times, or...
00:17:17.320 It don't count, like...
00:17:19.540 That's what I just said, like, yeah.
00:17:23.000 So, no one's boot a ring and said...
00:17:25.820 No, no, no.
00:17:27.060 It doesn't...
00:17:27.620 It don't count.
00:17:29.080 Like, it's like, I've had a promise ring, but is a promise ring a wedding ring?
00:17:32.780 No, no, it's not.
00:17:34.200 I don't count that.
00:17:35.460 But at the time, you feel like it.
00:17:36.500 But did he say it was a promise ring, or did he say it's an engagement ring?
00:17:39.540 No, he said it was a promise ring, and then he said...
00:17:42.380 He was trying to...
00:17:43.340 He said.
00:17:44.880 It doesn't count.
00:17:45.680 That's what I'm saying.
00:17:46.180 Financially, he was trying to get the property.
00:17:49.340 I'm not going to do it.
00:17:50.500 It doesn't count.
00:17:53.240 Okay, how...
00:17:54.340 So, everyone went, right?
00:17:55.620 How does a guy identify a good woman?
00:17:57.200 Yeah, mandem time.
00:17:58.800 Okay.
00:17:59.900 All right, men, if you want to say how do I...
00:18:02.780 One, are any of you with a good woman?
00:18:05.780 Like, anyone married?
00:18:07.160 Anyone married?
00:18:07.840 We're not married yet.
00:18:08.660 No, no, no married.
00:18:10.040 Okay, I just wanted to get...
00:18:11.000 Okay.
00:18:11.400 How do you find a good woman?
00:18:12.880 How do I find one?
00:18:13.960 Yeah, identify one.
00:18:16.020 I think a good woman...
00:18:18.500 I can't tell a good woman straight away.
00:18:21.260 It has to be along the course of time.
00:18:22.920 She needs to be how I want, when I want, when I need her to be.
00:18:28.300 And I won't get that from the first look basis.
00:18:31.480 Do you know what I mean?
00:18:32.300 So, I think a first...
00:18:34.000 A good woman, to me, is a woman that has good family values,
00:18:39.820 that know how to be around her family,
00:18:42.860 that has a good relationship with her dad,
00:18:45.220 submissive, caring, nurturing,
00:18:52.160 and...
00:18:52.920 healthy.
00:18:58.920 That's about it.
00:19:00.080 All right, caring.
00:19:01.200 Yeah, that's about it for me.
00:19:02.620 And how do you know a good one?
00:19:04.200 So, right now, this is what you have to do.
00:19:05.980 You have to see her for three months.
00:19:07.740 Yeah.
00:19:08.100 Ask her to make you a coffee.
00:19:09.820 No, I'm free.
00:19:10.880 Yeah, yeah, yeah, go for it.
00:19:11.360 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:19:11.680 That three month thing.
00:19:12.860 Yeah, yeah.
00:19:13.360 Three months.
00:19:15.340 Yeah.
00:19:16.000 This is for the woman you pick to marry.
00:19:18.300 So, like, okay.
00:19:19.380 And you can make edits, so it's okay.
00:19:21.120 Take on a coffee date for a first date.
00:19:25.000 Okay?
00:19:25.840 Date as many women as possible.
00:19:27.920 Tell the difference.
00:19:29.580 Make sure she's not on birth control.
00:19:32.720 And figure out what her relationship's like with her family and her dad.
00:19:36.460 What do you agree with, disagree with, and what would you like to add?
00:19:45.140 There's loads I need to add to that, man.
00:19:47.600 It's not that simple.
00:19:49.780 Let's get the whole thing, man.
00:19:50.940 Start again.
00:19:51.740 Yeah, start again.
00:19:52.660 Tell me that list again.
00:19:54.560 We can keep going.
00:19:55.720 So, you got to see her for three months.
00:19:58.260 So, what are you guys thinking?
00:19:58.820 For three months?
00:19:59.420 Yeah.
00:19:59.660 Yeah.
00:19:59.980 Cool.
00:20:00.560 I think three months.
00:20:01.200 That's enough.
00:20:02.100 You can marry a girl three months?
00:20:03.440 No.
00:20:03.880 No.
00:20:04.140 No, you can't.
00:20:04.680 Oh, okay.
00:20:05.100 In three months.
00:20:05.800 We got to.
00:20:06.500 But you know why you can't.
00:20:07.800 A lot of women are chameleons.
00:20:09.020 No, 100%.
00:20:09.880 Yeah.
00:20:10.880 Trust me.
00:20:11.360 They can.
00:20:11.680 100%.
00:20:12.280 Shapeshift.
00:20:13.020 How, how, have you ever dated a girl for three months and she changes completely?
00:20:16.520 Yes.
00:20:16.960 Yes.
00:20:17.760 She changed, like, you know when the biggest change of a woman happens?
00:20:21.180 Why?
00:20:21.500 When she has a baby.
00:20:22.120 For me, that's when I see the biggest change in a woman.
00:20:25.500 So, you won't even really know your woman until she has a child properly.
00:20:28.700 That's what I believe.
00:20:29.320 So, in order to find a good woman, you have to get her pregnant?
00:20:32.000 No, you don't have to.
00:20:33.040 But I'm saying.
00:20:33.520 Don't worry about that.
00:20:36.100 No, you don't have to.
00:20:37.160 Because there's certain things you'll see.
00:20:38.340 But I'm saying, from my experience, I have three kids, innit?
00:20:41.480 So, I saw the biggest change when the woman had a child.
00:20:45.180 Okay.
00:20:45.940 So, how long should you see her before you marry her, knock her up, whatever?
00:20:50.400 I don't know about marry her, knock her up.
00:20:51.840 Three months is a good time to determine whether she's being genuine.
00:20:54.940 If she's wearing a mask or not.
00:20:56.340 So, you got to see her for three months in order to date her?
00:20:59.120 Like, what's the...
00:20:59.620 I mean, I don't think, as he said, you can't really determine anyone as the true person
00:21:04.340 as they're being genuine as they say they are for, like, the first three months, genuinely.
00:21:08.500 If you've lived with someone, that's different.
00:21:10.900 If you move in with someone, you can see the truth, like, a lot quicker.
00:21:13.380 Actually, can I...
00:21:14.580 I'm sorry.
00:21:15.520 I'm a little ADD sometimes.
00:21:17.080 When do you guys expect to sleep with her?
00:21:19.340 You don't...
00:21:21.140 You know what?
00:21:21.820 That's subjective.
00:21:22.660 You see that question there, yeah?
00:21:24.540 It is very subjective, yeah?
00:21:26.880 In general.
00:21:27.760 Are you saying expect?
00:21:28.700 Yeah, expectation is a big word.
00:21:30.040 I don't have an expectation.
00:21:31.100 I don't have an expectation.
00:21:31.980 They expect straight away.
00:21:33.000 On the first date.
00:21:33.720 You know what it is?
00:21:34.440 Fourth date.
00:21:35.140 I'll be honest, yeah?
00:21:36.240 I don't think there's too much of...
00:21:38.240 It's not a problem if you sleep with a woman the first night or you sleep with a woman two months down the line.
00:21:42.860 Because a man can move different.
00:21:43.860 Man can wait...
00:21:44.620 You can sleep with her as soon as you can.
00:21:47.360 Yeah, but...
00:21:48.120 You know what it is?
00:21:49.020 Because you can sleep with a woman straight away and have a great connection and a great relationship with her.
00:21:54.100 Or you can...
00:21:54.940 A woman can hold out for six months and whatever.
00:21:57.280 And there's a man out here that will sit there for six months.
00:21:59.300 How married?
00:21:59.740 Clark and bust out.
00:22:00.760 Do you get what I'm saying?
00:22:01.620 All right.
00:22:01.960 How long is too long?
00:22:03.540 I'm just gonna...
00:22:04.260 I need hands, okay?
00:22:05.700 How long is too long?
00:22:07.140 No matter how good the girl is, you ain't waiting.
00:22:09.600 Like, this is ridiculous.
00:22:10.260 Three months is the max to wait.
00:22:12.820 I just want hands for the max.
00:22:14.800 Are you waiting one...
00:22:15.780 All right.
00:22:16.200 Wait, wait, wait.
00:22:17.400 He's cupping.
00:22:19.080 I need hands.
00:22:20.240 Are we waiting a week?
00:22:21.600 Is that okay?
00:22:22.620 All right.
00:22:23.000 Yeah, I'll wait a week.
00:22:24.400 Okay, I need you to go...
00:22:26.240 Put your hand up when it's too long.
00:22:27.900 Yeah, yeah.
00:22:28.440 All right.
00:22:29.440 Two weeks.
00:22:30.960 Three weeks.
00:22:32.940 So you're putting in three weeks?
00:22:34.620 It depends on the context.
00:22:36.060 I mean, has she made other people wait?
00:22:38.780 You don't know.
00:22:39.380 You don't ever know that.
00:22:40.840 Yeah, that's a stupid thing.
00:22:41.480 You never know that.
00:22:42.120 You don't know.
00:22:42.580 You don't know.
00:22:42.600 You don't know.
00:22:42.620 You don't know.
00:22:42.840 I'm not gonna be the one that waits.
00:22:44.680 Because I'm not gonna be the one that waits.
00:22:46.440 So, I mean, like, how old is she?
00:22:50.500 I mean, she's some kind of born-again virgin.
00:22:53.340 I don't know.
00:22:53.860 I don't know.
00:22:54.440 I'm not...
00:22:55.380 You're getting a girl from first date, like, so you don't know.
00:22:59.960 You've just met her off the street, whatever, dating app, whatever.
00:23:03.280 So you have to determine.
00:23:04.380 All right, so three weeks you can wait.
00:23:05.860 You're not...
00:23:06.360 You're...
00:23:07.200 He's...
00:23:07.560 Okay, four weeks.
00:23:08.500 Four weeks too long for anyone?
00:23:10.720 No, five weeks.
00:23:12.520 Okay, two months too long to sleep with her?
00:23:16.160 The two months is the max.
00:23:18.040 All right.
00:23:18.380 After that, yeah.
00:23:19.640 I'm gonna go with two months.
00:23:20.960 I might lose two months for me.
00:23:22.100 Yeah, I get bored easily.
00:23:23.300 So after two months, I might...
00:23:24.440 Two months.
00:23:25.440 Yeah, I'll go with two to three months.
00:23:27.120 Two to three months.
00:23:27.960 All right, so three.
00:23:28.880 All right, so you guys, too.
00:23:29.760 You said she could have three.
00:23:30.400 I don't know, but the thing is, I've done three months when I was young.
00:23:33.500 Maybe when I'm older now, I don't know.
00:23:35.700 That's why I'm in...
00:23:37.420 But when I had the three months, that relationship lasted.
00:23:40.540 Oh, you meet a nice woman.
00:23:43.320 You think you're looking for a good woman.
00:23:44.820 If she's the one, then I could wait like a year, but I have to be convinced.
00:23:48.120 A year.
00:23:48.860 Yeah, no, I don't care.
00:23:49.960 If she's the one one.
00:23:50.780 I don't know if she's the one, though.
00:23:51.860 But then you have to know, you have to be in her life for that whole time.
00:23:57.080 I understand her.
00:23:57.840 How old are you again?
00:23:59.040 I'm 29.
00:23:59.800 Okay, you're 29.
00:24:01.000 So how old women do you usually date?
00:24:03.300 Around my age.
00:24:04.280 So if she's not a virgin, will you wait for a year for her?
00:24:07.540 She's not a virgin, will I wait for a year?
00:24:09.460 If I was...
00:24:10.860 Yeah, I could do.
00:24:11.940 I could do.
00:24:12.440 It's not likely.
00:24:13.480 I could do.
00:24:13.880 Are you sleeping with other people at the time?
00:24:15.800 You're waiting.
00:24:16.420 Yeah.
00:24:16.520 Yeah.
00:24:21.120 Somebody's really waiting.
00:24:23.560 That's a good question.
00:24:25.220 I don't know what she's waiting for.
00:24:26.760 I don't know what...
00:24:27.600 That's a good question.
00:24:28.500 Okay, okay.
00:24:29.180 So you got a year.
00:24:30.620 You went from two months' hands to a year.
00:24:32.980 Yeah, but I'm saying it depends how much...
00:24:35.200 All right.
00:24:36.760 The average, the nice...
00:24:39.620 I don't know, your favorite girl that you've been on a date with.
00:24:42.320 Let's just take her.
00:24:43.140 Whatever you guys can think of.
00:24:44.260 Whoever your favorite ex is, whatever.
00:24:46.520 All right.
00:24:46.780 Would you have waited a year for her?
00:24:49.880 Yeah, I did.
00:24:50.560 Oh, you did.
00:24:51.200 Okay.
00:24:52.700 So you'll wait a year.
00:24:54.180 You'll wait...
00:24:54.560 Two months.
00:24:55.160 Two months.
00:24:55.820 You'll wait what?
00:24:57.480 When you say...
00:24:58.160 Now you're saying favorite.
00:24:59.320 Yo.
00:25:01.060 He says you're looking for a wifey.
00:25:03.200 I'm just...
00:25:03.640 I was just trying to get a visual on something.
00:25:05.320 I would wait.
00:25:05.980 But one of the...
00:25:06.660 If you're talking about favorites, it didn't last...
00:25:08.780 It didn't take long.
00:25:10.080 It was first time.
00:25:11.120 No, but how long would you wait for a girl you liked?
00:25:13.540 That's what I'm saying.
00:25:15.060 I just use that as, you know, giving...
00:25:17.080 I don't know.
00:25:17.580 I can't answer that question.
00:25:18.880 Please answer the question.
00:25:20.020 Yeah, but it's hard for me to...
00:25:20.960 You're here to answer my question.
00:25:22.580 No, 100%.
00:25:23.340 This is what you're here for.
00:25:24.540 How long would I wait?
00:25:25.320 Please just give me an answer, please.
00:25:26.820 It doesn't have to be set in stone.
00:25:28.000 I would wait two months.
00:25:28.680 Yeah, two months.
00:25:29.120 Okay.
00:25:29.600 Thank you.
00:25:29.980 Thank you so much.
00:25:31.580 You're like three weeks, roughly a month, a month.
00:25:34.540 Yeah, three weeks.
00:25:35.120 So one month, two months, a year.
00:25:37.040 We gotta...
00:25:37.760 A year, yeah.
00:25:38.820 Okay, so step one.
00:25:40.600 Sleep with her as soon as possible and wait up to...
00:25:47.000 A year?
00:25:47.980 Up to one month to a year, depending on the guy.
00:25:55.280 Because what if you wait a year and you don't like it?
00:25:57.200 Mm, mm, good point.
00:25:59.120 I wasn't only in that one, into that one, so you know what I'm saying?
00:26:03.140 Yeah.
00:26:05.500 Okay, well, okay, so don't wait.
00:26:07.340 Now we're going back.
00:26:08.300 Don't wait.
00:26:09.120 I don't know.
00:26:09.620 Just for him, though.
00:26:10.640 He's waiting, yeah.
00:26:11.360 He's waiting.
00:26:11.560 Okay, so next step.
00:26:13.000 Okay, so when should you ask her to make you a coffee?
00:26:16.640 That's what we have.
00:26:18.180 I don't even drink coffee.
00:26:20.020 Okay, so what else?
00:26:21.200 How else do you vet for a good woman?
00:26:24.200 You know what?
00:26:24.940 To vet a good woman, yeah.
00:26:27.820 I think you need...
00:26:28.560 It depends on the communication and the conversation that you have.
00:26:30.940 So going coffee is...
00:26:32.480 I agree.
00:26:34.400 And the maddest thing is, the girl that I'm seeing now,
00:26:36.740 this is the first time I've ever gone coffee,
00:26:38.280 and we had a mad conversation in Costa over coffee.
00:26:40.980 And I've never done that before, which is mad.
00:26:43.180 But once you have a good...
00:26:45.980 Through conversation and through certain things,
00:26:48.440 a man would get an idea.
00:26:50.180 So adding on to what Rome's the same with family values,
00:26:53.460 traditional, maybe even fair of God,
00:26:56.300 like conversation with her, you will understand a lot more about her.
00:26:59.140 Do you know what I'm saying?
00:26:59.480 If she could...
00:27:00.060 Can she even conversate?
00:27:01.060 Can we have a proper conversation together?
00:27:02.820 You know what I'm saying?
00:27:04.300 Okay.
00:27:04.880 So take on coffee date, sleep with her as soon as possible.
00:27:08.940 Coffee date after I finish waiting.
00:27:11.640 Oh, so that...
00:27:13.080 Okay.
00:27:14.020 You're getting on coffee date after you finish waiting.
00:27:16.400 That's a waste of time.
00:27:17.180 Nah, man.
00:27:17.640 You've got to go first.
00:27:18.600 What?
00:27:19.020 Okay.
00:27:19.420 Bye.
00:27:20.660 Go on coffee date,
00:27:22.560 either before or after you sleep with her.
00:27:25.600 Can I just say really quickly, I promise.
00:27:29.880 The reason why you could say that now
00:27:32.440 is because you're in a position to be open,
00:27:36.780 to be receptive to her as well.
00:27:38.620 You know, some guys would be like,
00:27:39.820 what, you know, like we're going clubbing
00:27:42.000 or, you know, it depends on the man as well.
00:27:44.680 Yeah, 100%.
00:27:45.380 I'm not putting blame on the man,
00:27:46.920 but it's a two-way street.
00:27:48.460 A lot of Purley's list man has,
00:27:49.840 so I've probably gone through dating women,
00:27:52.500 gone through this, gone through that.
00:27:54.220 So now when I meet someone,
00:27:56.220 I can analyse a good woman.
00:27:57.580 Do you get what I'm saying?
00:27:58.560 Yeah.
00:27:58.780 And it's through, actually,
00:27:59.800 I feel like, to your question of
00:28:01.580 where's all the good women gone here,
00:28:02.900 I feel like a lot of good women
00:28:04.300 don't have the values of back in the day.
00:28:06.760 So women, I don't know back in the day
00:28:08.720 because I wasn't born back in the day,
00:28:09.640 but I think a lot of women
00:28:10.700 don't want to show wife credentials
00:28:12.760 before they're a wife.
00:28:13.800 So they will hold things back
00:28:15.120 expecting you to put a ring on their finger
00:28:17.400 because it's like, oh, I can do this,
00:28:20.680 but I'm not going to do these until I'm your wife.
00:28:22.460 But man, I'm thinking,
00:28:23.060 man, I'm thinking, bro,
00:28:24.540 all right, if you're going to,
00:28:25.580 cool, there's other girl out here
00:28:27.020 that's going to show me what a wife is.
00:28:29.100 But imagine acting like a wife
00:28:30.420 and doing full throttle,
00:28:31.340 like cooking's different,
00:28:32.140 but full throttle acting like a wife
00:28:33.440 for you to go and see someone else
00:28:34.640 or play around.
00:28:35.680 But if you don't do that,
00:28:36.780 the man's gone.
00:28:37.720 So do you want to show him,
00:28:39.380 do you want to show him
00:28:40.260 that you're a wife?
00:28:40.940 Because a man coming into it
00:28:42.460 is showing you're ready,
00:28:43.140 I'm a husband.
00:28:43.420 If you want a promotion,
00:28:44.660 don't you do the job
00:28:45.920 that he gives you first?
00:28:46.900 Or do you say promote me
00:28:49.080 with no work experience?
00:28:50.500 Because you know what,
00:28:51.080 if I,
00:28:51.480 okay, one second,
00:28:52.780 me and you are in a relationship
00:28:53.740 or we're building up a relationship
00:28:55.780 and then we go out
00:28:57.060 and then I'm,
00:28:58.500 and I don't know,
00:28:59.560 gal beat you up
00:29:00.200 or something happens,
00:29:01.120 I'm here to protect you,
00:29:02.420 but I just stand there
00:29:03.180 and just watch you.
00:29:04.540 When we go home now,
00:29:05.480 what are you going to say to me?
00:29:06.320 No, no one would,
00:29:07.460 I mean,
00:29:07.740 no one would do that.
00:29:09.340 You can't say no one
00:29:10.500 because there's,
00:29:10.880 there's man out here
00:29:11.700 that's not going to protect you.
00:29:12.760 So our job is to,
00:29:13.740 our job is to protect someone.
00:29:15.080 A stranger would jump in
00:29:16.020 and protect someone.
00:29:17.060 Okay, forget the semantics.
00:29:18.560 My job is to protect
00:29:19.380 and provide for you.
00:29:20.340 If I don't protect you
00:29:21.400 when I'm out with you
00:29:22.080 and you're rolling out with me,
00:29:23.400 when we go home,
00:29:24.160 what are you saying to me?
00:29:25.820 Before,
00:29:26.560 what,
00:29:27.160 as in a fighting situation?
00:29:28.340 That's a bit,
00:29:28.700 that's not a good example.
00:29:29.540 Okay,
00:29:29.840 whatever the situation
00:29:31.000 where you need protecting
00:29:32.240 and I don't protect you
00:29:33.560 in that situation,
00:29:34.820 what are you doing
00:29:35.460 after that situation?
00:29:36.400 I don't,
00:29:36.740 I can't answer that question
00:29:37.480 because I don't know
00:29:38.020 what you mean by protecting.
00:29:39.240 You're deciding that
00:29:40.300 he's not the one.
00:29:41.620 That doesn't make sense.
00:29:42.140 It's happened to me before.
00:29:43.460 There was like an accident.
00:29:44.680 Yeah, in Costa Rica,
00:29:45.620 there was like a canoeing thing
00:29:46.680 and a kayak thing
00:29:47.820 and he didn't show up
00:29:49.540 and I was,
00:29:50.140 I really questioned
00:29:51.260 my future with this guy.
00:29:52.480 That was,
00:29:52.720 for me,
00:29:52.980 it was done.
00:29:53.660 Done.
00:29:54.140 Of course.
00:29:54.520 Of course it's done.
00:29:55.600 Yeah, so if you,
00:29:56.340 he didn't show up.
00:29:57.160 I was polite about it.
00:29:58.140 But if he didn't,
00:29:58.680 but if you don't show
00:29:59.760 your wife credentials
00:30:00.560 to the man,
00:30:01.440 what do you think
00:30:01.760 he's going to do?
00:30:02.220 The thing is,
00:30:02.880 there's an extent,
00:30:03.560 there's a limit.
00:30:04.240 You can't do everything
00:30:08.020 and so you can't do everything
00:30:09.160 and I'm not,
00:30:09.780 you don't out here
00:30:10.300 prove to you that he's a good husband.
00:30:14.080 But that's fear though.
00:30:15.240 No he don't.
00:30:15.580 What the hell?
00:30:16.080 Yes?
00:30:16.920 That's fear though.
00:30:18.080 Like that's the thing,
00:30:18.680 like you're going into something
00:30:19.700 in bad faith.
00:30:20.520 Oh, I can't do much for him.
00:30:22.320 Otherwise he might not pick me.
00:30:24.120 Why give him a choice anyway?
00:30:25.180 Yeah, but it's like,
00:30:26.140 you're going into things in fear
00:30:27.700 and you don't get anything worth having
00:30:29.540 if you go into shit scared.
00:30:31.360 Exactly.
00:30:31.960 Like you can get your heart broke,
00:30:33.480 like it happens.
00:30:34.560 Scared money don't make no money.
00:30:35.960 Yeah, but it's like,
00:30:36.920 you have to,
00:30:37.340 in order to,
00:30:38.160 okay,
00:30:38.540 in order to start this whole podcast,
00:30:40.880 I had to invest first,
00:30:42.340 but women want all the outcomes
00:30:43.860 without having to invest anything.
00:30:46.080 I feel like it's a two-way thing.
00:30:48.440 You didn't hear what she just said.
00:30:49.320 A husband has to come to her already.
00:30:51.360 So it's a two-way thing.
00:30:52.720 So then why does a wife have to,
00:30:53.680 why do you have to come?
00:30:54.300 So don't you think, Paul,
00:30:54.720 it's a two-way thing.
00:30:55.860 So if I'm,
00:30:56.580 if I'm,
00:30:57.320 it's 50-50
00:30:57.920 and then you're both on the same page,
00:30:59.600 that's different.
00:31:00.220 Of course I can do that.
00:31:00.880 But if I'm not going to do the most
00:31:02.680 and you're doing the least.
00:31:03.360 Okay, so I have a question.
00:31:04.420 Do you,
00:31:04.660 when you go and date,
00:31:05.260 who pays?
00:31:06.680 He does,
00:31:07.120 but I will pay.
00:31:07.860 I can pay.
00:31:08.420 No, I didn't say you can pay.
00:31:09.740 I said who pays?
00:31:10.840 The guy will.
00:31:11.820 Okay, so why does he have to invest in you
00:31:13.960 before you've slept with him?
00:31:15.300 But can I tell you something, Paul?
00:31:16.340 Why?
00:31:16.580 Why?
00:31:17.120 He has to,
00:31:17.240 no, no, no.
00:31:18.100 Like, we have to think about this.
00:31:19.400 Why does he have to invest in you
00:31:20.780 before you've slept with him?
00:31:21.780 But I've done that before to men.
00:31:23.060 I've paid on first dates before.
00:31:24.340 I've offered,
00:31:24.960 like, you know,
00:31:25.380 because I have the kindness of my heart.
00:31:26.520 It's not about offering.
00:31:27.000 It's not about offering.
00:31:28.540 I've done it.
00:31:29.460 Offered and done it.
00:31:30.080 I'm not talking about what you have done.
00:31:31.520 I'm talking about what typically happens.
00:31:33.280 You're a pretty girl.
00:31:34.100 I know these men pay for you.
00:31:35.920 I feel like men are in a stereotypical mindset
00:31:40.940 where they feel like they're the big man.
00:31:42.980 They have to be responsible for paying
00:31:44.780 for a first date and stuff like that.
00:31:46.160 So I feel like that's why they do it automatically.
00:31:47.980 Because men are traditional.
00:31:49.740 Men are more,
00:31:50.280 you're right,
00:31:51.440 men are in more traditional roles than women.
00:31:54.440 So it's like the men are coming to you
00:31:56.040 in a traditional role.
00:31:57.080 They're taking you on a date.
00:31:58.000 They're paying.
00:31:58.980 But you're saying,
00:31:59.840 I can't be a traditional woman for him.
00:32:01.680 I can't give him wifely duties.
00:32:03.020 When off the bat,
00:32:04.380 before he even knows
00:32:05.580 if he's going to get sex from you,
00:32:07.460 which is what men want, right,
00:32:09.460 he's paying.
00:32:10.640 £200 ate nothing to a man.
00:32:12.440 Let's be honest.
00:32:13.160 £200 ate nothing to a man.
00:32:14.700 Yes, yes, yes.
00:32:15.180 Let's be honest.
00:32:16.520 £200 ate nothing to a man.
00:32:19.280 Hold on, hold on.
00:32:19.880 Let me just show of hands here.
00:32:22.160 Is £200 nothing to you guys?
00:32:25.400 Raise your hand if £200 is nothing to you.
00:32:26.920 If the investment goes right, it's great.
00:32:28.340 If it doesn't go right, it's a lot.
00:32:30.000 OK, OK.
00:32:30.260 If one is £200 and nothing,
00:32:33.240 so none of these men are men?
00:32:35.660 Of course they're men,
00:32:36.520 but there's different calibers of men.
00:32:37.880 OK, they're not the right calibers of men.
00:32:39.900 Yeah, what's the calibers?
00:32:40.720 Yeah, what's the calibers?
00:32:41.820 What's that about?
00:32:42.500 No, but I just...
00:32:44.120 No, no, stand on your words.
00:32:45.120 I have a certain type of man.
00:32:46.580 Like, I like a man that's, you know...
00:32:48.300 I want a man that's like a leader in a high position
00:32:51.780 that can teach me because I want to be in that place too.
00:32:54.520 And you're willing to show him nothing.
00:32:57.040 No, listen.
00:32:58.420 Like I said, £200 ain't nothing to a man.
00:33:00.720 You could show him everything and he would just...
00:33:02.400 And he could possibly not be serious of you
00:33:04.840 and be speaking to another girl
00:33:06.260 or sleeping with someone else.
00:33:07.360 And that's the only reason.
00:33:08.780 So that you're already...
00:33:10.120 No, until I know that you're serious,
00:33:11.760 I can surrender to you.
00:33:13.520 Period.
00:33:13.820 So you're not even respecting a man's pocket
00:33:15.220 on the first day?
00:33:16.180 Like I said, £200 is nothing to a man that has to do.
00:33:18.940 You don't respect the money
00:33:19.920 because you just said it's nothing.
00:33:21.400 Because you're looking at it like...
00:33:22.260 Unless he states he's not able to afford
00:33:25.280 to go on a date or whatever.
00:33:26.280 No man is going to state anything.
00:33:29.640 A man could have his last £200 and spend...
00:33:31.240 Bro, you don't date when you're broke.
00:33:32.420 No, no.
00:33:33.000 You don't date when you're broke.
00:33:33.940 One second, one second.
00:33:34.420 You can't say that
00:33:35.360 because men are dating when they're broke.
00:33:36.880 Well, that would never be...
00:33:38.780 What do you mean?
00:33:39.480 If he doesn't want to spend £200 on a date...
00:33:42.300 Like, what?
00:33:43.100 No, I mean...
00:33:43.760 You need £200 on a first date?
00:33:45.800 I'm a power man here.
00:33:46.500 For what?
00:33:47.420 But that's...
00:33:48.140 I didn't ask.
00:33:49.280 No, you said...
00:33:50.540 I didn't ask for it.
00:33:52.040 No, you said £200 ain't nothing to a man.
00:33:54.680 To a man, yeah.
00:33:55.120 And then when all of these guys said,
00:33:57.820 no, that is something to me,
00:33:59.140 you shat on them.
00:34:00.420 You said they're not a high enough caliber of man.
00:34:03.160 No, no, personally,
00:34:04.080 but I'm saying from my experience,
00:34:06.900 people have paid...
00:34:08.560 I've been on dates
00:34:09.600 and I've never spoke to a person again after
00:34:11.100 and they've spent a lot of money.
00:34:12.140 Do you know what I mean?
00:34:12.580 Like, I don't know.
00:34:13.120 But what I'm saying is, yeah,
00:34:13.780 you're not valuing their time and money
00:34:15.640 because you think that
00:34:16.780 every single one of them
00:34:17.740 that's spending that money,
00:34:18.580 whether it's £100 or £200,
00:34:20.040 you think all of them have got it.
00:34:21.540 There's some man that probably
00:34:22.400 have taken you out on a date
00:34:23.180 and that's their last...
00:34:23.740 Probably, but I'll never know.
00:34:24.780 Exactly.
00:34:25.440 So then, but you're still
00:34:26.320 not respecting their money.
00:34:27.380 I don't think about it like that.
00:34:28.940 Exactly.
00:34:29.500 Because you're still saying
00:34:30.920 that you can't give them too much
00:34:32.880 but they're spending £200 on you
00:34:34.440 on a first date.
00:34:35.400 But I don't think...
00:34:36.200 The way guys go on,
00:34:37.320 they act like money is nothing to them
00:34:38.560 and they're...
00:34:39.360 Do you know what I mean?
00:34:39.900 So why would I be so conscious?
00:34:41.780 Unless I love you
00:34:42.820 and I know about your financial situation,
00:34:44.480 it'll be completely different.
00:34:44.880 No, okay, but this is the thing.
00:34:46.040 You're just not appreciative
00:34:46.980 because you're saying,
00:34:48.280 no, you're not...
00:34:49.200 I'm listening to you speak.
00:34:50.620 Does she come off appreciative
00:34:51.720 to anyone?
00:34:52.540 No, no.
00:34:53.280 I'm not an ungrateful person
00:34:54.660 like for real, for real.
00:34:55.140 Okay, but I'm listening to you speak.
00:34:57.400 If I liked a guy
00:34:59.260 and I spoke to him on a level
00:35:00.400 and he came to me and said,
00:35:01.200 I can't even afford to take you out
00:35:02.340 in a certain place,
00:35:03.280 I would not have a problem with that.
00:35:04.560 Believe me.
00:35:04.980 No man is going to do that.
00:35:05.560 Believe me.
00:35:06.020 But you just said
00:35:07.780 it ain't nothing to a man
00:35:09.060 and when all the guys in here said...
00:35:10.300 But the men are dated.
00:35:11.320 Right, but I said
00:35:12.200 when all the guys in here said,
00:35:13.380 no, that is something to me.
00:35:14.480 To them.
00:35:15.300 You said they're not the caliber of man.
00:35:17.780 You insulted them.
00:35:18.740 No, not really.
00:35:20.960 No, I said broke men don't date.
00:35:23.340 That's what I said.
00:35:23.880 Okay, so a man's broke
00:35:24.940 if he doesn't want to spend 200 pounds.
00:35:26.880 Again, I'm from a 1%
00:35:29.060 like top earning family.
00:35:30.760 Like broke men
00:35:31.740 can just not want to spend 200 pounds
00:35:33.800 on someone they don't know.
00:35:35.040 They don't have to, yeah.
00:35:35.880 But I don't ask for it.
00:35:36.840 It's not about that.
00:35:37.400 But you know what?
00:35:37.960 If a man really likes you
00:35:39.320 and he's into you,
00:35:40.560 he will spend his last 200 pound on you
00:35:41.900 without you knowing.
00:35:42.920 But I would not have known that though.
00:35:43.920 Because they have money
00:35:45.240 and they go on like,
00:35:46.060 oh, like everything's fine.
00:35:47.160 No, but it's not like
00:35:48.460 a man's going on like anything.
00:35:50.480 A man's just not going,
00:35:51.140 we're not going to openly say,
00:35:52.200 oh, we're going to the dinner table.
00:35:53.900 The bill comes out.
00:35:54.640 Oh, you know what?
00:35:55.060 I can't afford this.
00:35:55.900 Some man, I don't know.
00:35:56.820 I've never been in a situation.
00:35:57.640 You're never going to be in that.
00:35:58.680 I've never been.
00:35:59.380 So I can't relate to that.
00:36:00.320 What's your name?
00:36:00.960 Royal.
00:36:01.560 Royal.
00:36:02.300 You're never going to be in that situation
00:36:03.480 where a man's going to be at the table
00:36:04.540 and tell you,
00:36:05.100 yo, I haven't got money to pay for this.
00:36:05.760 One guy say to me that
00:36:07.040 like go for coffee
00:36:08.040 and you know,
00:36:08.820 I think he was testing me
00:36:10.620 but I was fine with that
00:36:11.460 because I actually liked him.
00:36:12.520 Like it's not an issue.
00:36:13.220 I don't care about the money.
00:36:14.860 No, he never.
00:36:15.300 But he said that,
00:36:15.920 you know,
00:36:16.420 I'm not in a great position right now
00:36:17.960 and that's fine
00:36:18.440 because I knew he was intelligent
00:36:19.520 and I knew that he was someone
00:36:20.800 I could build with
00:36:21.440 because he's very smart.
00:36:22.680 He just wasn't in the right place
00:36:23.800 at the time.
00:36:24.580 Now I didn't have an issue with that.
00:36:25.860 Unfortunately,
00:36:26.460 it didn't work out.
00:36:27.260 Why didn't it work out?
00:36:27.980 Well, he's,
00:36:28.660 he's Muslim.
00:36:31.100 Bro, it's not about money.
00:36:32.200 Like I'm not a shallow person.
00:36:33.980 So please let's not do that.
00:36:35.400 Like I know I'm not a shallow person.
00:36:36.620 We're just repeating back
00:36:37.720 what you're saying.
00:36:38.560 I'm speaking from my own experience so far.
00:36:40.660 I can't say anything else
00:36:41.700 but what I've experienced.
00:36:42.440 There could have been
00:36:42.860 at least two of them.
00:36:43.920 I've never had a man
00:36:44.600 that's not been able to pay for something
00:36:46.220 that I'm aware of
00:36:47.240 and he has.
00:36:48.080 I've never had that.
00:36:48.480 That you're aware of.
00:36:49.780 There could have been at least
00:36:50.500 one man that took you on that date
00:36:51.820 that was his last dime.
00:36:53.040 Yeah,
00:36:53.560 and I would never have knew
00:36:54.440 so and I'm compassionate about that.
00:36:56.020 No, you have to respect that.
00:36:56.980 I do respect that.
00:36:58.440 But I think,
00:36:59.300 if you think broke men
00:37:00.280 shouldn't date
00:37:00.860 or then should fat women not date?
00:37:04.720 Why does Bill always talk to that?
00:37:07.880 I just don't know
00:37:08.620 if we have the same energy.
00:37:09.660 Do you know what it is?
00:37:10.300 I feel like beauty
00:37:11.020 is in the eye of the beholder.
00:37:12.420 No, you can't change up
00:37:13.580 your eyes of the beholder.
00:37:13.940 Sorry, beauty is in the eye
00:37:15.220 of the beholder, period.
00:37:16.140 So there's a guy
00:37:16.860 that might be attracted
00:37:17.600 to an overweight woman.
00:37:18.500 Money is in the eye
00:37:20.080 of the beholder.
00:37:21.940 Money is in the eye
00:37:23.260 of the beholder.
00:37:23.720 Listen,
00:37:24.240 if your mentality
00:37:26.080 is above average
00:37:26.900 and you're broke,
00:37:27.740 I fuck with you
00:37:28.580 because I know
00:37:29.400 you've got potential
00:37:30.020 and that we can build together.
00:37:31.200 We can be power couples.
00:37:32.100 But what is potential?
00:37:33.520 It's money later.
00:37:34.600 That's all it is.
00:37:35.800 Potential is money later.
00:37:36.860 No, no, no.
00:37:36.980 It's more about life.
00:37:38.720 Okay, if you meet
00:37:40.740 Brokey at 25
00:37:41.800 and you're with him
00:37:42.940 for five years,
00:37:43.800 he's still Brokey,
00:37:44.780 unemployed.
00:37:46.020 What, you're staying?
00:37:46.880 Say that again, sorry.
00:37:47.740 Brokey,
00:37:48.200 you meet a Brokey guy,
00:37:49.440 25,
00:37:50.340 and he's unemployed
00:37:51.220 and now he's 30.
00:37:53.640 You're still with him.
00:37:54.580 He's unemployed.
00:37:55.180 Are you staying or going?
00:37:56.420 No,
00:37:56.940 because you're not pushing me
00:37:57.600 to my limit.
00:37:58.020 No, I wouldn't.
00:37:59.160 What, five years?
00:37:59.660 You wouldn't write out five years?
00:38:00.740 As many of you know,
00:38:01.780 I was just banned on TikTok
00:38:03.840 and we are demonetized
00:38:05.560 on a daily basis
00:38:06.800 on this platform.
00:38:08.700 If you want to help,
00:38:10.080 please consider sending
00:38:11.220 a super thanks below.
00:38:13.080 Every donation helps
00:38:14.460 and it helps make
00:38:15.300 what we do possible.