Shocking FACTS About Relationships
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
213.30148
Summary
In this episode, we talk about who wears the pants in a relationship and why it's important to have someone in charge in order to make the decisions. We also talk about what it means to be a woman in a male-dominated world and how important it is to have a man in charge.
Transcript
00:00:00.000
So what happens in, like, a lesbian relationship, then?
00:00:04.900
Well, again, like, I think to be clear, everything that was said...
00:00:07.340
Everything that was said is fine for relationships.
00:00:12.440
Like, what you started talking about, you're going to talk to your partner.
00:00:14.460
You're going to make sure that they understand where you're coming from.
00:00:16.060
Hopefully you love each other and you know each other.
00:00:17.820
Hopefully you both have each other's best interests at heart.
00:00:20.680
But I just think at the end of the day, someone wears the pants.
00:00:22.720
Like, someone's leading and someone's following.
00:00:28.120
But at some point, like, you have to trust someone's leadership.
00:00:31.440
It's going to depend on the domain that you guys are experts in, right?
00:00:36.880
So I'm guessing that traditionally men are going to have the say over the car because men tend to know.
00:00:41.240
But I'm guessing you probably know more than your husband does, right?
00:00:43.340
If he comes back with a 50-pound bill for blinker fluid, you're probably going to...
00:00:46.920
You're probably going to make fun of him, right?
00:00:51.020
As Pearl knows, and as you most probably know, yes, I'm a mechanic.
00:01:00.380
And as you know from the shit car that I picked you up in, right?
00:01:04.460
Because I must have been having a blind, non-mechanic, feminine moment where I just went in and asked for the cheapest car with four doors.
00:01:16.440
It's not for somebody who's got three grandchildren because three grandchildren, he fills the car.
00:01:19.800
But whereas, he hasn't seen the car yet because I didn't discuss it with him.
00:01:24.020
And he's going to look at me and say, why did you get that car?
00:01:29.720
But I've decided to punish myself for being such a stupid woman and choosing such a stupid car when I was feeling in my most feminine moment.
00:01:41.900
But whereas, even though I'm a trained mechanic, you know, my nails, and there's certain things that he will do in the car.
00:01:56.820
I'm just saying that in every relationship, like, both sides are going to know more things than the other side.
00:02:01.840
But, like, so there are going to be some things where the husband is going to have, like, the grand authority, but not because he's the man.
00:02:06.860
But just because that's the stuff that he knows about, because the woman has, like, the authority, because she knows about it.
00:02:11.780
I agree with you, but the last decision, you see, with me, we would discuss stuff.
00:02:18.980
And I will say this, and he will say that, and then I might be right, and he'll say, you know what, go with you.
00:02:26.520
Or he might be right, and I'll say, go with you.
00:02:29.460
But if we come to a stalemate, me, I will say, you know what, we're going to go with you because the decision is all yours.
00:02:35.680
Because if the shit hits the fan, me as a bitch woman, I will say, you know what, you made that decision.
00:02:44.180
Whether he agrees with me or whether I agree with him, I prefer the final decision to be his because he has to deal with it.
00:02:55.180
I just think, personally, the ideal situation is when you're with a guy that you can trust his decision-making.
00:03:00.020
And I think the girls, and the girls that I see where they wear the pants in their relationship, they're miserable.
00:03:08.140
Like, there are plenty of women where guys wear the pants, and they're miserable, too.
00:03:11.560
There are lots of people in miserable relationships.
00:03:16.420
I've just seen, I think that when women wear the pants, they're miserable.
00:03:19.960
What I don't understand in a relationship, can I just say, why does someone have to wear the pants?
00:03:32.300
Like he said, if you have more expertise in that field, say, okay, like, if I'm trying to make a decision with my man now, I know about properties, right?
00:03:43.060
Like, say he doesn't know anything about properties, I'm going to be like, oh, babe, because I've bought a property, this is what I'm going to tell you.
00:03:49.460
And because he's probably, like, men know more about cars.
00:03:57.460
Because I assume, because men seem to know more about cars, and if he has a nice car, he's been driving for a long time, I'm going to think, you know what?
00:04:13.320
When they hear about a submissive woman, do I look like a woman that just does what her man says?
00:04:33.320
And even when it comes to getting properties, he was a saver.
00:04:36.980
He was like, no, I need to save money or whatever.
00:04:47.700
Because a selfish man, a man that just wants to feel all full of himself, would just go with what he wants.
00:04:54.540
And we're not talking about the lady in the red coat.
00:04:58.020
We're talking about where you've got a man that leads.
00:05:02.860
When you've got a man that you can trust, he will take into account what you said.
00:05:11.220
And he will come out with the best decision for you.
00:05:13.860
Whether it means you side with him or whether it means it sides with you.
00:05:18.580
And if he's not sure, he will either say, you know what?
00:05:22.000
If he's a stubborn, big-headed, bullish man, he will say, you know what?
00:05:27.740
When I was talking about buying a property, my man didn't agree with me.
00:05:33.120
But it seemed like an impossibility to him in his mind as a natural saver.
00:05:53.780
Because a lot of women think that, oh, I might know more about this, but he's the man.
00:06:01.200
If a man respects you, he will take into account your decisions, your research, your qualifications,
00:06:11.300
And if a man is going to go with all your knowledge, all your experience, all your decision-making,
00:06:16.720
and what you've been doing for a lifetime and go against it.
00:06:19.840
But don't you think you're talking about skills in a man?
00:06:23.140
That is a man that has lived, a man that's matured, a man that has had relationships,
00:06:29.640
We're talking about men in their 20s and 30s that have yet to become.
00:06:34.740
So we cannot, we cannot have the same attitude at all.
00:06:37.860
You're talking generationally completely different.
00:06:43.880
You are, your expectations for our 2023 men that have been raised with sometimes very little foundation,
00:06:51.040
you're expecting so much for them to have all of these qualities that your man of X years
00:06:59.880
I think the point is to pick a good man that you can use.
00:07:03.200
100%, but what I'm talking about, we're here now, we're here trying to find this good man.
00:07:08.120
In the Mecca, we're like, oh no, the nonsense is happening.
00:07:13.720
Listen, listen, listen, listen, listen, hold on, hold on, hold on.
00:07:17.280
I've been listening to, like, I haven't even said nothing for ages, you know,
00:07:20.840
like, at the end of the day, it comes down to who you pick.
00:07:25.320
So you can say all of this, oh yeah, we're trying to find these good men.
00:07:29.500
At what age are you trying to find these good men?
00:07:38.580
The problem that I find nowadays is that the women's picking.
00:07:48.640
Yeah, the problem is at 25, there are no men like this, okay?
00:07:52.120
If you're a 22-year-old woman, you're not going to find a 25-year-old guy
00:07:54.920
that's ready to take charge and lead everything.
00:08:02.200
I know there are a lot of children on this panel, but you're not going to find a 25-year-old
00:08:06.540
When the average kid gets out of school today at like 22, 23 years old, you're thinking,
00:08:18.720
Yeah, if in university, if you finish that at 22, 23, there's no way.
00:08:25.000
At 24, 25, as a man, you are not going to have all the faculty that you will when you reach
00:08:31.780
You don't have that lived experience yet to know what it's like to lead a household,
00:08:35.180
to live a life, to exist in like the world and to navigate it in a responsible way.
00:08:40.500
It's funny that you guys are the first ones to say that we have two high expectations
00:08:44.340
and then come and tell us that we're not picking the right men and that we're just picking
00:08:51.100
If you think that you need a 35-year-old guy, go date one.
00:08:58.880
I want a young man just like myself so we can relate together.
00:09:08.120
You guys keep talking about how you need a man to lead.
00:09:14.920
You know, I've spent a lot of time with myself.
00:09:22.040
I want a man that we can actually share experiences together rather than a leader.
00:09:28.480
Yeah, I think the problem is when I listen to Pearl and Rich is an auntie, a little bit,
00:09:31.760
mainly you two guys, it feels like you guys are saying that women need to look for fathers.
00:09:51.320
But if you had the same standards now, which I have met some really good young men that had
00:10:01.580
The women don't want them because they're average men.
00:10:13.360
He was sexy as hell and all the young girls wanted him.
00:10:48.360
But it's like everybody's saying, I need to have it as average.
00:10:56.600
Because if I look at my age mates, my successes, my achievements, my personality, my drive,
00:11:23.600
You think I just woke up and I bred and I'm a single mom.
00:11:29.880
Can I talk and talk really quickly, going back to what we were saying before?
00:11:32.880
It's just that because sometimes as a single parent, because you've been in a relationship
00:11:36.180
and you've been there before, you've got different expectations.
00:11:39.040
No, I'm saying I didn't start as a single parent.
00:11:45.040
I really don't like the way you guys assume things about single parents.
00:11:54.680
So does that make her average because she's a single parent?
00:12:11.060
And when you're talking about drive, that's not things that men look for.