JustPearlyThings - August 22, 2023


The Main Problem With Relationships Today


Episode Stats

Length

9 minutes

Words per Minute

194.38829

Word Count

1,859

Sentence Count

1

Misogynist Sentences

15

Hate Speech Sentences

8


Summary


Transcript

00:00:00.000 too at right now because with the way society is structured like men are just being slammed with
00:00:06.760 sexual images non-stop like the moment we wake up like how about some sex you know and so this has
00:00:13.400 caused male thirst to be at an all-time high yeah and so dudes are like a you know when guys get good
00:00:21.220 with game and you know getting with a bunch of women that sex that ejaculation that hunt is all
00:00:27.500 based upon dopamine and so you got these guys are just searching for that next dopamine hit you know
00:00:33.520 what i mean and then also i don't think we've ever had a period in time where older women were doing
00:00:39.200 their best to stay sexy you know i mean i think like back in the day they'd be like you know yeah
00:00:46.640 you know you have like the j-lo's and you got all these different women i don't keep up celebrities
00:00:51.760 but not j-lo's the only one i know but like you know they're they're older women in their 40s and
00:00:56.320 50s right that are like trying to be super sexy so when you're sexy you know guys are dogs guys are
00:01:04.360 fucking dogs and so they're gonna come after you yeah but i also think it doesn't really count
00:01:09.820 until you're until you're married really or in a long-term relationship with kids because that seems
00:01:14.800 to be the new marriage nowadays because i think a lot of times as women will mistake sexual attention
00:01:19.600 for relationship attention and they're not the same that's huge yeah but because a lot of women
00:01:24.440 they'll conflate the fact that a million dudes are in their dms right and like hollering at them
00:01:30.040 but i would say 99 of those dudes they're gonna fuck you a couple times and disappear yeah and then
00:01:36.240 you're gonna be like oh i thought you liked me i'm guilty of that like majority girls are for women
00:01:43.600 that want relationships where is where are the best places to look see see you know what here's the
00:01:48.600 thing i know i'm like a red pill guy and i'm supposed to like shit on women because that's like
00:01:52.340 what the majority of people do but that even for me is something that i have been trying to answer
00:01:58.380 the question to i can't tell these women where to find good men but i can tell them where not to find
00:02:04.560 them where we're not any dating app agree i'm not on any of those at all anymore any dating app bars
00:02:12.820 any if he has any kind of drug addiction no yes right church used to be a stable thing but honestly i
00:02:19.720 would say this the guys that you ignore are probably going to be some of the better
00:02:23.500 relationships yeah the guys that don't even show up on your radar yeah because it's just it is hard
00:02:29.420 because for guys you know when mainstream media and mainstream culture is just telling girls by
00:02:37.300 default to be sluts to be whores to sleep around right it's really hard so that's the conundrum we
00:02:44.360 have right now is like good women are usually trying so hard to find good men and good men are
00:02:52.800 trying so hard to find good women because for me too after i became successful it's just like how i don't
00:02:58.360 even know like where to like find decent women because like women who like you for your clout or for
00:03:03.600 your money or all those things you know it's just like this bitch is treacherous like she's after me
00:03:09.960 yeah before things that i have not me dating once you have a following is so different oh dude i have
00:03:16.160 trauma i want to go to a monastery like because because it's just it's so for so i'm talking from
00:03:22.460 a guy's perspective it's so hard to one vet a woman and find out the truth of who she is
00:03:32.620 and and then on the other side of the coin it's the same thing for ladies because you're blinded
00:03:40.020 by your own attraction like i like this person well they did this like this means they like me but then
00:03:44.860 like you know when you go through a situation when you thought someone loved you you thought they liked
00:03:48.980 you a lot and then you find out that yeah they didn't and then they leave quickly when they don't
00:03:54.080 want to resolve conflict or whatever then you're just sitting there like damn i just really don't
00:03:57.760 know shit and i went through that i i literally went through that someone who i thought was on my
00:04:03.160 team um who i i you know i gave myself to and we i thought we were on the same page and then you
00:04:10.740 later want to find out it was it wasn't that it was not being reciprocated yeah and and that's where
00:04:16.640 you have to draw every piece of strength what happened uh without going into too much detail um wrong show
00:04:23.940 i put a lot of trust into someone whom uh when i just when i began communicating with him um he of
00:04:34.440 what i had previously been through which allowed me to drop my guard um and i was happy to do so
00:04:41.200 because um he made me feel safe okay um and i think for him it may have been what he could get
00:04:47.740 uh but i think the worst thing for me was that there was no resolution it was a straight cut off
00:04:54.160 to this day what do you mean a cut off i mean when it when things kind of sort of came about
00:05:00.100 and um you know when things really mattered and we should have been communicating we should have been
00:05:04.680 speaking about it speaking about the very small issue it was a very very small issue um what issue
00:05:10.820 was that it was a very small issue um it literally there was no conversation like we did we didn't get to
00:05:17.400 speak about what the problem was did you leave or did he leave he did oh so he left and then you
00:05:22.620 just never heard and i never heard was he younger no he was older so can i say that emotional labor
00:05:28.980 it does not come with a marker i don't think that you can you know be on a dating app or be in church
00:05:36.720 or wherever see someone meet them be on a date with them and say yes this person is willing and committed
00:05:42.520 to put in emotional labor to make this work you only know that when you come up to those those
00:05:49.400 situations that require the emotional i actually don't really think men should care about our
00:05:54.040 emotional needs no i don't think she means emotional needs i think like you know when you get to a point
00:05:58.020 in a relationship where there's like a a breaking point yeah but the both of you are gonna have to
00:06:03.340 endure through a that wasn't even i'm not even trying to be yeah yeah but like when you have to like
00:06:08.620 endure through hardship absolutely you know some people they just give up yeah and it's and it's
00:06:16.800 detrimental because i've i've been that i've been that person who didn't want to give up i was like
00:06:21.960 you know and i wanted to be committed to the situation when your partner gives up and then
00:06:27.240 that's just like and unfortunately like how does i just don't understand how that like works because
00:06:32.500 you're not a because you're not a dirtbag that's why well no because when i hear emotional labor like
00:06:37.740 i i always hear that i don't really hear that term used then i usually hear it when it's like my
00:06:42.240 partner's not meeting my emotional needs that's what i hear when i hear emotional no i think she's
00:06:46.400 talking about because there's points in a relationship what do you mean i would say that the emotional
00:06:50.420 labor is any situation that you come up against as a partnership where there requires some
00:06:57.260 either compromise or you two have to sit down and have a difficult discussion about you know
00:07:01.540 do the kids go to school here or there or you know you know it's just anything i think i think
00:07:06.020 the man should automatically decide do you i do i do i believe in i believe in traditional
00:07:11.460 relationships which are a bit different than like 50 50 so which which basically like a lot of times
00:07:16.860 women we want the guy to pay for everything we want we want to like a traditional outcome where he
00:07:21.580 pays for us he leads he's masculine but what you're supposed to give up with that is authority
00:07:26.440 yeah can i add on to because i you tell me if i'm wrong because this was your original
00:07:31.540 statement but i'm just going to add on to it i think what she means by emotional labor is like
00:07:36.260 again like you will get to a point where you will have a hard time like you both need to push through
00:07:43.860 an obstacle and i think that the example she gave about you know the schooling whatever was more about
00:07:51.140 like there's going to be emotional turmoil and conflict can i have an example just so i could
00:07:56.320 understand better what you're talking about let's just say you know you're both at an impasse where
00:08:02.260 you're just like there there's a communication barrier like you're saying one thing and i'm saying
00:08:08.720 another thing right and we really don't see eye to eye and we should just keep on trying to push through
00:08:18.160 keep on trying to communicate and get through it that's what a relationship that works looks like
00:08:25.860 but one party man or woman the emotional labor what's the actual issue
00:08:31.220 have you ever been in a relationship yeah i have okay everyone says i haven't but i have
00:08:36.620 virgin vibes
00:08:39.960 let's take you at your word then so you've been in a relationship have you ever had to
00:08:45.700 make a decision in that relationship either you say that you believe in traditional relationships
00:08:49.920 no i think i think one i think traditional relationships work better because if you look
00:08:56.060 at the history of them relationships tend to work better in countries that have more traditional
00:09:00.100 relationships and you know if you look at 100 years ago 95 percent of people were married but i'll
00:09:05.800 say no i wasn't a good girlfriend i think that's why we broke up well i'm not sure that answers the
00:09:10.240 question which which part well have you ever had a confrontation or a disagreement with your
00:09:15.680 partner ever in history yeah and the result of that confrontation was what have you ever broken
00:09:20.800 up over a disagreement irreconcilable differences um yeah yeah um it was more different values though
00:09:27.680 so it was like it was kind of getting to the point where we've been dating a bit and it was either
00:09:32.400 we're going to get you know married