JustPearlyThings - August 15, 2023


The Pathetic State Of Relationships In 2023


Episode Stats


Length

10 minutes

Words per minute

230.01805

Word count

2,379

Sentence count

178

Harmful content

Misogyny

23

sentences flagged

Hate speech

22

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, we discuss the difference between men and women when it comes to sexual assault and rape. We also talk about the different types of sexual assault in our society and how they affect our perception of women and men.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 man prioritizes, I think when a man prioritizes like the girl, his girl over everything, that's
00:00:04.800 when these things can happen. I think a man should be on his purpose and a man should be on his ground
00:00:08.400 and create like his purpose and then everything will fit around, you know, what he's trying to
00:00:12.960 do as well. I feel sometimes when a man's just fully on, just trying to make a girl happy and
00:00:17.600 fully trying to, you know, please her all the time and then she gets frustrated and then, you know,
00:00:22.240 you know, loses respect for him and then these things can happen. Yeah, that's true. But I think,
00:00:26.080 but I think that society makes men do that. Yeah, 100%. Because like, think about if me and you're
00:00:31.520 in a contract and I gain everything by leaving and you lose everything by leaving, of course,
00:00:35.440 you're going to do more to make it work. How could you not? And me, I'm paid to not make it work.
00:00:40.400 So it's like, I think that the way that the laws are structured literally influence how we are in
00:00:45.280 relationships with each other. That's right. Men can't really win. Men in 0.93
00:00:49.840 always get the short end of the stick. No, they can't. So that's how it is then, yeah?
00:00:54.160 No. But again, if you know this, if you know it and you, because there's knowing things and then
00:01:01.040 there's accepting things. There's a lot of people know things, but not everyone accepts it. So if
00:01:05.040 you know this, but you also accept it, then you're all right. You're in a good place. You understand?
00:01:10.160 You've controlled the emotion. If you don't accept it, you're going to be pissed.
00:01:12.800 Then you're going to get emotional because it is very unfair. But then again, life's not fair.
00:01:20.640 Yeah. I mean, it's not that every woman will, but it's that every woman can. So if you have a child
00:01:25.600 with a girl, because you can avoid marriage, but you can't avoid children, you just have to hope 1.00
00:01:28.880 she doesn't do it. That's it. There's no real way to avoid it because men only get custody of their 1.00
00:01:34.080 kids 10% of the time. It's a real deal. Yeah. I only know this because I'm doing a documentary on the UK
00:01:41.600 court system now. So I literally interviewed these men and there's some of them where I'm like,
00:01:45.520 I don't know how you could have avoided it. You got a girl that was from a nice home, two parents.
00:01:50.880 You had everything. Like she had no red flags and she's still, they still do it.
00:01:56.000 That sucks. But think about it. Think about it. It's like, okay, if stealing was legal,
00:01:59.600 right. If it was legal to steal, right. You might be a good, you know, I'm not, I'm not a stealer.
00:02:03.600 I don't steal things, but you know, if stealing's legal and every day I'm like tempted looking by all the
00:02:10.080 people that are stealing, I'm walking by one day, I might just do it because it's legal and the
00:02:14.960 system allows for it. So it doesn't necessarily mean like women are malicious and out to get you, 0.99
00:02:19.440 but like, you know, it's a lot of power to give one gender in their favor. That's right. Yeah. 0.93
00:02:27.120 But it goes back to like the society where we always view the woman as the victim. Like if I mean,
00:02:31.840 do you guys know anyone that's been falsely accused of a crime? Like a guy? Yeah.
00:02:35.760 Yeah. And like most of society just believes her. Right.
00:02:40.080 It's like, even if you see in football, that you see that rapist is that, you know,
00:02:44.000 Grapist, Grapist, Grapist, but you see, um, like when you have situations like that,
00:02:49.280 you know, everyone just believes that that is a guy that did it.
00:02:51.920 Do you know what I'm saying? Just because of what society, you know,
00:02:55.280 the image of society portrays and that. So yeah, therefore.
00:02:58.640 Yeah. It's another interesting point. Again, when you talk about like women, 0.63
00:03:03.120 you were saying earlier about a lot of men not getting like a,
00:03:07.280 not having sex basically. You know what I'm saying? And again, it's because women, 1.00
00:03:11.520 they can be more picky because they're ultimately the ones saying yes or no.
00:03:15.040 You can't have sex with a woman unless she says yes. You know what I'm saying? 1.00
00:03:18.560 Whereas guys, you know what I'm saying? That's what guys are going to,
00:03:20.880 their standards are going to be low. They're going to get anything they can.
00:03:22.960 You know what I'm saying? Unless you're in a certain fraction of man,
00:03:25.920 you know what I'm saying? Then your kind of options are a bit more.
00:03:28.720 Yeah. Very.
00:03:29.920 Well, and it's interesting because we're the,
00:03:31.600 it's like an unprecedented time in history because women are a hundred percent in 1.00
00:03:34.960 control of who's born. Where historically,
00:03:36.960 like the men would impregnate the woman if you didn't comply, you know,
00:03:40.560 they're going to grape you, you know, like, so historically, like,
00:03:43.440 like men have always been in control of reproduction where now women are 0.99
00:03:47.040 for the first time ever in history with abortion being legal.
00:03:51.120 Right. And men, like you have no say if I get an abortion. 0.85
00:03:54.400 Exactly. Yeah.
00:03:55.040 It's short end of the stick again.
00:03:56.480 Yeah. So like when, when you think about it,
00:03:58.000 women are a hundred percent in control of relationships and sex. 1.00
00:04:01.200 So it's like, if it goes south,
00:04:02.480 like how can we not say it's on the women because we're a hundred percent in
00:04:05.520 control. Exactly.
00:04:06.960 Again, it's good that you're saying all these things because they're real,
00:04:10.400 the facts that people probably don't even want to agree with them because they
00:04:15.200 sound kind of a bit funny, but it's the, it's the realist.
00:04:18.160 Yeah. Well, and it's not to hate on women. Like I think any group that has a significant
00:04:22.320 amount of power, like I heard, I was just interviewing this guy who's like a,
00:04:26.320 he made this book called the history of sex today. And he was talking about how back before,
00:04:31.040 like, you know, in order to satisfy like the, the one out of three men that are either like the,
00:04:36.480 the sexless men in a tribe, because if you didn't give them sex, like now we have corn, 0.85
00:04:40.080 but before they didn't. So you had to give them something. Otherwise they get angry and start to riot.
00:04:43.680 So they would literally like take a girl and make her have sex with like 20 dudes.
00:04:47.680 Like a gangbang.
00:04:48.720 Yeah. Yeah. Like that's what they would do historically.
00:04:50.960 But now it's like, this is the first time where women are in control, 1.00
00:04:54.240 a hundred percent control of sex and reproduction.
00:04:56.560 What? So the gallim are digging up the mandem now? 1.00
00:04:58.720 What?
00:04:59.280 You mean the gallim are having sex with the guys and 1.00
00:05:01.920 No, like, like, like, so before the women had to comply with what the men, 0.99
00:05:06.240 like the strongest, fittest men wanted. So if you were in a guy's like with the,
00:05:10.160 his tribe or whatever, and they're protecting you and he says,
00:05:13.040 go sleep with 20 men. You got to do it. What are you going to do? 0.68
00:05:16.400 What's the switch now?
00:05:17.520 So now the switch now is that like women are a hundred percent in control of who's born 1.00
00:05:21.920 because we are in control of abortion.
00:05:23.840 Right.
00:05:24.560 So, and we are a hundred percent in control of birth control.
00:05:27.120 So if the, maybe if there was a male birth control, that was like the equivalent,
00:05:30.400 because, okay. If I sleep with, if I sleep with you, right.
00:05:33.760 I, we, we both, I know a hundred percent, like all the,
00:05:37.120 the facts about the sex we're having. Right. 0.55
00:05:39.360 Because like, I know if they're wearing a condom or not that like,
00:05:42.000 that's the only form of birth control that men have, but women, 1.00
00:05:44.560 it's like, you don't know if I'm ovulating or not.
00:05:46.160 You don't know if I'm on birth control or not.
00:05:47.680 You don't know if I'm going to take the plan B.
00:05:49.440 You don't know if I'm going to go get the abortion or not. 0.76
00:05:52.080 Yeah. And so that's what I'm saying.
00:05:53.360 Like women are a hundred percent in control now. 1.00
00:05:55.680 And you can even say women are a hundred percent in control of relationships 1.00
00:05:58.640 because what comes first sex or relationships nowadays in 2023.
00:06:02.880 Yeah. You've said it already. Sex, isn't it?
00:06:05.120 Yeah. Sex. And so it's like, it's like, if, if that's the case,
00:06:08.880 then women are a hundred percent in control. 1.00
00:06:10.960 Yeah. Women. Yeah, that's right. Women are in control these days. 1.00
00:06:13.600 But again, if you're like a masculine man and you,
00:06:18.080 you understand, keep to, you understand the masculine ways,
00:06:20.800 women are still going to, you understand. 0.98
00:06:22.720 Submit.
00:06:23.200 Submit and be.
00:06:24.160 Someone in the chat said they still sleep with 20 guys.
00:06:27.120 They just aren't told to.
00:06:28.320 They were.
00:06:29.520 Yeah.
00:06:30.320 Yeah.
00:06:31.040 Actually, I actually thought that when you said it,
00:06:33.440 because women now like they're happy to sleep around with more than one guy at a time. 1.00
00:06:39.840 You understand where that was kind of a lot more taboo nowadays.
00:06:44.080 It's not really out there accepted,
00:06:46.640 but it's like a lot of the rappers and these filming rappers,
00:06:49.520 they've made it kind of like trendy to do that.
00:06:51.520 Like, well, you could sleep around off that.
00:06:53.600 If your man ain't saying one,
00:06:55.200 you can diss him and move over to the next man.
00:06:58.480 And again, it puts a lot of pressure on men in sex as well.
00:07:01.680 You understand?
00:07:02.400 Again, it's very.
00:07:05.360 Yeah.
00:07:05.680 No, it's just, it's the truth.
00:07:07.280 It's, it's very that if a man comes quick,
00:07:09.920 I hear you.
00:07:10.400 He's going to get shunned.
00:07:11.680 But if a woman comes quick, 1.00
00:07:13.360 then no one says anything.
00:07:14.960 But if you're having sex and sex is about having fun and pleasure with each other,
00:07:17.920 shouldn't really make that much difference.
00:07:19.840 But again, there's a lot of pressure.
00:07:21.840 Again, men always get the short end of the six that you can't, you can't win.
00:07:26.960 That's mad, you know, to hear it as well as that sounds crazy.
00:07:30.080 Well, I think they're trying to, like you said this,
00:07:31.440 to emasculate the guy, innit?
00:07:33.120 Exactly.
00:07:34.720 Exactly.
00:07:35.120 That's why a man have to hold. 0.98
00:07:36.080 That's the agenda.
00:07:36.720 Man have to keep strong and keep firm and keep their emotions under control.
00:07:39.760 And when you do that, then women will, you understand? 0.98
00:07:42.560 Well, you need, you know what it is?
00:07:43.840 It's easier said than done.
00:07:44.800 I think a lot of people struggle because there's no one around them to, people get,
00:07:48.880 a lot of guys get bad advice, you know, get bad advice from other people.
00:07:51.440 I'll give you my number if you want, bro.
00:07:52.320 No, no, no, I don't need that.
00:07:53.760 I'm not talking about me myself, you know what I'm saying, you're a joker.
00:07:56.800 But I'm saying a lot of men, a lot of men,
00:07:59.120 no, the truth is a lot of men get bad advice from other guys as well.
00:08:02.080 Do you know what I'm saying?
00:08:02.720 And that can influence them to like, not be able to manage emotions.
00:08:06.400 Like it's a skill, do you know what I'm saying?
00:08:07.680 100%.
00:08:08.480 You have to go through certain situations, be able to,
00:08:11.200 because I feel like as a man, a man goes through certain situations,
00:08:14.160 childhood tribulations that, and then yes,
00:08:16.400 this character will get tested through these situations and it's up to him to
00:08:20.400 like, you know, now when the character gets tested for him to, you know,
00:08:24.880 okay, cool.
00:08:25.840 I've gone through this.
00:08:27.120 Now, um, I learned from this and then I'm able to like, become more stronger.
00:08:31.200 Yeah.
00:08:31.520 You can't just have, be like, have a skill where it's like, okay,
00:08:34.000 manage emotions.
00:08:34.800 You're not born to manage emotions.
00:08:36.400 You know what I'm saying?
00:08:37.120 It's everything's going to take practice and over time.
00:08:39.680 Yeah.
00:08:40.240 But it goes back to like keeping the family together because like,
00:08:43.440 how is it, how is a man going to learn from a woman how to control his emotions? 1.00
00:08:47.280 You can't.
00:08:48.080 I'll be honest with you.
00:08:48.800 I don't even believe that as well.
00:08:49.760 Cause in my situation, like my family's been together, but it's been so that kind of like
00:08:55.040 always arguments and stuff like that.
00:08:56.480 And you can see that in my situation, like, you know, you know, um, I've been around a lot
00:09:02.160 of emotional men in my family and stuff like that.
00:09:04.560 So it's, you know, and that can make someone like, you know, go off the edge, but you have
00:09:09.840 to learn again from understanding the situation and learn and adapt and see what it is.
00:09:15.120 But I feel a lot of people can be in situations, some of my friends as well, situations whereby
00:09:19.680 they've grown with their mum and they've grown with their dad as well.
00:09:22.320 But cause it's in a toxic kind of like, um, scenario and whatnot, they ain't able to like,
00:09:28.000 you know, be able to manage emotions.
00:09:29.840 They get frustrated and then, and then they go through no shit as well.
00:09:33.680 I think the state of relationships makes like relationships worse.
00:09:37.120 So the state of marriage and like long-term relationships, how like our, our generation
00:09:41.200 really like even you, when you said six years, I was like, I don't know the last time I've
00:09:44.960 had someone on the show in a relationship for more than six years.
00:09:48.160 Right.
00:09:48.800 And, and so like that being impressive is a little sad when you think about it.
00:09:54.720 It's happy for you, but no, but think about it.
00:09:57.440 No, no, think about it.
00:09:58.240 It's happy for you, but just like, it shows the state of society, but it's like,
00:10:02.160 because we're always ha we both parties, mostly women have one foot out the door all the time. 1.00
00:10:06.960 It's going to change the way you argue.
00:10:08.240 Cause every argument, you're not thinking about a solution.
00:10:10.720 You're thinking, should I leave?
00:10:11.600 Or should I go or before marriage was for life?
00:10:15.280 So you had to stick that shit out.
00:10:16.720 So you had to think of a solution because you couldn't go get divorced. 1.00