JustPearlyThings - August 28, 2023


The Solutions To Improve What's Happening In SOCIETY


Episode Stats


Length

10 minutes

Words per minute

202.99199

Word count

2,162

Sentence count

198

Harmful content

Misogyny

23

sentences flagged

Hate speech

16

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, we talk about abuse in marriage and how to deal with it. We also talk about how women need to stop feeling like victims and how they should be strong in order to be a good wife and mother.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 I got some solutions for you.
00:00:02.680 So I say one, we got to get rid of no-fault divorce.
00:00:05.860 Once you get married, you're stuck for life.
00:00:08.800 Yes, I think that's number one.
00:00:11.080 I think, no, I think I'll give you an out.
00:00:13.280 I'll give you one out.
00:00:14.600 I'll give you an out for abuse if he's beating your ass. 1.00
00:00:17.560 Okay, that's a problem.
00:00:19.040 But none of this money abuse.
00:00:23.180 Certain people would just say, oh, this is what's happening.
00:00:27.360 Oh, I know.
00:00:28.080 Women lie all the time about it. 1.00
00:00:30.100 But what I would do is I would make it so if she falsely accuses you,
00:00:35.760 she goes to jail.
00:00:37.580 And it would be really harsh.
00:00:38.980 So what about emotional abuse?
00:00:40.360 No, I don't believe in emotional abuse.
00:00:42.620 No, I don't believe in that.
00:00:43.860 Oh, God.
00:00:44.300 I think emotional abuse is worse than that.
00:00:46.440 You don't believe in...
00:00:47.640 No, I think women emotionally abuse men. 0.80
00:00:50.180 I don't think men emotionally abuse women.
00:00:51.160 You don't believe in manipulation, narcissistic behaviors?
00:00:53.640 No, I think all of these are just words that women make up 1.00
00:00:57.160 to make themselves victims.
00:00:58.360 So what if you woke up every morning and your husband looked at you and said,
00:01:05.520 you look disgusting.
00:01:07.100 Well, then I'd say, how can I improve?
00:01:09.980 And then what if he says you can't?
00:01:11.800 Right?
00:01:12.420 What do you do then?
00:01:13.300 Well, then I'd say, I think that sometimes we just want to make ourselves victims.
00:01:18.480 Like, what is that going to do?
00:01:19.560 So would you kind of say, like, all right, then, cool.
00:01:24.500 Except for abuse, like, let's just put abuse in another category because that's separate.
00:01:28.600 So would you say, like, for example, the woman has to, like, be already, like, acceptable, 0.92
00:01:36.140 like, make herself acceptable for the man, such as if she was fat, you know, fat's falling
00:01:40.820 out everywhere, like a bag of potatoes.
00:01:42.280 Yeah, I think...
00:01:42.740 She would have to hit the gym. 0.97
00:01:43.880 Yes.
00:01:44.280 Or possibly even get surgery to die on the table.
00:01:47.020 Or, like, would you say that's the extent a woman would have to go to to... 0.99
00:01:50.100 That to get surgery?
00:01:51.120 Okay, I think that we should start with the treadmill.
00:01:54.020 Yeah, definitely.
00:01:54.560 Okay, okay.
00:01:55.300 But, yeah, I think if he tells you...
00:01:56.740 Or a salad.
00:01:57.320 Yeah.
00:01:58.500 Self-improvement.
00:01:59.340 But the wife is cooking steak and macaroni and cheese for her man, so she's never really 0.71
00:02:04.160 going to...
00:02:04.620 Yeah, but she can eat the salad, though. 0.99
00:02:06.540 Yeah, I'm all for self-improvement.
00:02:08.400 But that's still the woman lowering herself to meet the man's expectations. 0.99
00:02:13.760 Wait, wait, wait.
00:02:14.540 Self-improvement is a must, man or woman. 0.97
00:02:16.540 Yeah, it is, but...
00:02:16.980 Self-improvement is a must, but there's emotional abuse where someone's making you feel like
00:02:22.340 you don't want to live, then you're going to stay with that person when there's a whole
00:02:25.740 wild world out here to live.
00:02:26.480 How can somebody...
00:02:26.960 I just think nobody can make me feel anything.
00:02:29.460 I think women got to stop... 1.00
00:02:30.060 Some people are not that strong.
00:02:31.120 I think...
00:02:31.600 No, I think women... 1.00
00:02:31.960 Feeling like victims.
00:02:32.560 I think women... 1.00
00:02:33.280 I know, because women are addicted to being victims. 1.00
00:02:35.120 Look at every movie on TV.
00:02:37.320 We're emotional creatures.
00:02:38.280 Every...
00:02:38.720 I agree with you.
00:02:39.680 I agree with you, but, like, we just have a society that never tells us the truth.
00:02:43.660 And, like, we look at every TV show, every Taylor Swift song.
00:02:46.400 It's, you are a victim.
00:02:47.520 Poor you.
00:02:48.500 Like, at some point, Taylor Swift, I want an album.
00:02:51.040 It was me.
00:02:52.260 I am the problem.
00:02:53.880 That's where...
00:02:54.520 That's where...
00:02:55.320 That's where, like I was saying earlier, leadership comes back in.
00:02:58.360 Because if you have a strong man in the house that's representing leadership, and he's putting...
00:03:05.020 installing strength and installing...
00:03:07.280 Yeah, but he's going to tell you the truth, and you're still not going to like it.
00:03:09.600 No, no, she'll say she was emotionally abused.
00:03:12.740 Yeah.
00:03:13.180 But then there's the truth, and then there's just someone just blatantly taking the piss,
00:03:18.640 and just knowing that you're not strong.
00:03:19.860 I can't lie to you.
00:03:20.800 It all stems from the beginning, though.
00:03:22.260 Like, everyone has to pick their piece of shit, and I think...
00:03:27.820 And work with it.
00:03:28.420 And you have to work with it, because realistically, realistically, in a way, you know, a piece of shit
00:03:34.960 and a piece of shit together is a big part of shit, so...
00:03:37.680 So let's just live in and be right.
00:03:39.100 Well, why is it always assumed that he's the piece of shit?
00:03:41.860 Maybe you're the piece of shit.
00:03:43.080 You know what I mean?
00:03:43.520 No one's perfect.
00:03:44.580 Realistically, there's some traits that you yourself are going to have to water down to match the piece of shit.
00:03:50.300 Yeah.
00:03:50.620 So...
00:03:51.020 Well, look, everyone's got problems, right?
00:03:55.720 Yeah, everyone has problems.
00:03:56.980 But so I just think...
00:03:59.180 I think that a lot of times women want to, like, say, oh, the man didn't lead, but usually, this is just what I find. 1.00
00:04:05.760 I really think men naturally do lead when they have women that follow, that don't give them help. 0.95
00:04:11.480 But that's the thing.
00:04:12.400 Not every man...
00:04:13.780 I mean, it's nice to find the ones that do lead, but there's a lot of men that don't know how to lead,
00:04:18.840 and that's due to, like, maybe their upbringing...
00:04:20.180 Would you give them the opportunity to...
00:04:22.980 I have a question, but who raised those men?
00:04:25.260 Right, that's what I'm saying.
00:04:25.900 Sometimes they don't...
00:04:26.780 Those women. 1.00
00:04:27.320 Sometimes they're men...
00:04:28.000 Yeah, right, but sometimes they're not raised correctly or raised in a two-parent home where you lead a man and a woman.
00:04:33.520 And that's the problem because women keep leaving. 1.00
00:04:35.940 And they have no respect for...
00:04:37.000 You've got men that don't respect women in the first place because of the way they were raised. 0.99
00:04:40.900 Why would they when their mom left?
00:04:42.500 Right, that's what I mean.
00:04:43.440 So it all goes back down to the leadership.
00:04:45.300 Once you've got good leadership...
00:04:46.040 No, it goes back to the women's choices. 0.69
00:04:48.480 Fair enough.
00:04:49.440 No, I feel like there's a lot of aspects to why...
00:04:52.080 I feel personally, I feel like for men who can't lead a woman or even his family,
00:04:59.800 I feel like there's a lot of, like, background issues that go into that.
00:05:03.260 Exactly.
00:05:03.440 However, where I have to actually step into this and be like,
00:05:08.340 you have to also be strong for the man.
00:05:11.100 You have to also be there for the man.
00:05:12.980 If your man is weak, which you as a married person,
00:05:16.020 if you feel like you're weak in certain aspects, for example, you're sick,
00:05:19.300 your woman's going to look after you. 1.00
00:05:20.520 If you feel like, you know...
00:05:22.900 You've not met my wife.
00:05:24.420 Oh.
00:05:25.340 She leads me to it.
00:05:26.940 Fair enough.
00:05:27.720 But in certain circumstances, like, if you feel like you're weak in a relationship,
00:05:34.280 that person should be able to nurture you and you should be able to do the same thing for the other person.
00:05:38.800 A lot of women don't submit nowadays and that's the truth. 1.00
00:05:41.560 There's a lot of women, especially this generation, everything that's going on with social media, 1.00
00:05:45.160 like you said, a lot of women do not know how to submit. 1.00
00:05:47.880 Do you know how to submit?
00:05:49.960 I think I definitely do now.
00:05:51.620 I think when I was 16, 17, I don't think I knew how to submit.
00:05:55.480 But now, that's what I want to do.
00:05:57.620 So he tells you, delete your Instagram.
00:06:00.500 Are you doing it?
00:06:01.040 Yeah, absolutely.
00:06:02.420 It doesn't mean that much to me.
00:06:03.620 Okay.
00:06:04.060 I mean, I love my Instagram and I, you know, that's where I network and do my music and stuff.
00:06:10.320 But if I was with somebody that I felt that secure with and happy with and we're building a life together
00:06:16.280 and I ask him to do something, he doesn't mind, why not?
00:06:20.940 Well, I think the issue that I get into or I see a lot is women think we submit, 0.99
00:06:26.640 but it's really conditional submission because it's only when he's leading perfectly.
00:06:31.480 No, but no one's perfect.
00:06:32.580 Yeah, but that's, but like when you were saying earlier, oh, he stopped leading.
00:06:35.960 You know, it's like, is he only supposed to love you when you're being perfect?
00:06:40.860 It's not even just about love.
00:06:42.380 It's about, it's about, there's a lot of things, there's a lot of aspects into having a relationship.
00:06:46.280 And it's about trust.
00:06:47.660 If you're waking up happy, if you're waking up unhappy every day, then I don't see why you should hear me out.
00:06:55.360 I think your happiness doesn't matter.
00:06:57.420 Of course it does.
00:06:58.240 No, I don't think it matters at all.
00:07:00.000 I think we've told us women.
00:07:01.580 Yeah, I know.
00:07:02.180 I know.
00:07:02.840 Shocking.
00:07:03.160 But that's, I mean, that's for both men and women.
00:07:06.200 I want to hear what you have to say.
00:07:06.980 I'll tell you.
00:07:07.640 So, so I think we live in a society that's very self-centered and everything's about us.
00:07:12.140 And I think especially women, we've gotten a ton of attention from the time we were like 14, 15 years old when we got on social media, you know, or whenever, right?
00:07:22.080 Because we got Facebook, we got, and so you're immediately given all this attention from men, right?
00:07:26.940 And I think this has kind of made us brainwashed to think we're more important than we are.
00:07:31.960 We're more special than we are.
00:07:33.440 And I think we think our opinion matters more than it does.
00:07:36.600 I'm not saying our opinion doesn't matter at all.
00:07:38.940 But I don't think, I think couples that really made it 50, 60 years, they weren't concerned about happiness.
00:07:45.980 I think they were concerned about duty and playing your role.
00:07:48.580 But now we've been told it's about me, me, me, and my happiness.
00:07:52.200 And I think that should be last, especially when you got kids.
00:07:54.960 I feel like that is due now, because if you look at it, social media has given so many people a voice.
00:08:01.600 I feel like social media is definitely a bigger part to play in it.
00:08:04.440 And I also have to blame Disney because Cinderella, Snow White, Mulan, we all know how it's gone.
00:08:11.940 It's been pushing our faces to have that fairy tale.
00:08:13.960 But I feel like where we go wrong is, realistically, everyone deserves happiness.
00:08:19.760 Why would you want to be in a situation where it's a shit show?
00:08:22.400 Well, I think a lot of times women don't even know what makes us happy. 1.00
00:08:27.080 No, seriously, because we think very short term.
00:08:31.560 So we'll go for that top guy, right?
00:08:34.380 And is getting pumped and dumped a couple, you know, by the top guys really going to make us happy.
00:08:39.420 Like, think about it.
00:08:40.040 The last hundred years, we've had more choice than ever.
00:08:42.840 We could do anything we want.
00:08:44.220 And we have chosen to be whores as a group.
00:08:46.400 A hundred years ago, 85% of us were virgins on our wedding days.
00:08:51.120 Think about that.
00:08:51.700 A hundred years ago, even let's just say the women were liars, right? 1.00
00:08:55.580 And let's double the amount.
00:08:56.880 Like, let's make it from 15 to 30%.
00:08:58.700 That's still two out of three that waited until they were married, got married young, stayed married.
00:09:02.120 And so it's like, what has us choosing done for us, for our happiness?
00:09:07.200 When we follow our hearts, it's like, we're led to destruction.
00:09:10.480 But then you have to remember why women were so much, like, you have to remember why women so much had to, like, fight for their rights in certain situations.
00:09:23.680 Not every situation, but in certain situations.
00:09:26.440 No, I'll tell you, it's all propaganda.
00:09:28.300 They, like, funded the schools and, like, the women's studies department and basically rewrite history. 0.97
00:09:33.140 And there's, like, articles of them doing this.
00:09:36.080 So they basically say, we're going to speak for the women at the time, but the women at the time can't speak for themselves.
00:09:41.340 So, for example, the anti, the suffragettes, which is the women that were, like, fighting to vote, really weren't popular. 0.68
00:09:51.360 They weren't liked.
00:09:52.300 People thought they were crazy.
00:09:53.700 And they even wrote at the time, I don't think we can, like, it's going to be tough for us to convince women to get out of the home.
00:10:00.000 And the anti, and they planned bombings, they planned assassinations.
00:10:03.240 Like, these women that are, like, painted as heroes, like, fighting for our rights, they really weren't, they weren't the people you think if you actually read, like, the writings at the time.
00:10:12.540 The anti-suffragettes was, like, a bigger movement than the suffragettes.
00:10:16.400 As many of you know, I was just banned on TikTok.
00:10:20.140 And we are demonetized on a daily basis on this platform.
00:10:24.500 If you want to help, please consider sending a super thanks below.
00:10:28.660 Every donation helps, and it helps make what we do possible.
00:10:34.140 All right.
00:10:34.700 I follow you.
00:10:34.980 All right.
00:10:35.980 Too many.
00:10:36.360 What's your destination?
00:10:36.740 I'm gonna tell you.
00:10:38.140 Hi.
00:10:38.800 Türkiye.