JustPearlyThings - December 25, 2022


The UNREALISTIC DEMAND Of Modern WOMEN

Hosted by
Hannah Pearl Davis
Modern Women and the NEED to be RIGHT Things Got HEATED...

Episode Stats


Length

10 minutes

Words per minute

202.3

Word count

2,218

Sentence count

—

Harmful content

Misogyny

4

sentences flagged

Hate speech

4

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, we talk about generational trauma and what it means to grow up in a broken family. We talk about the effects of generational trauma in our lives and how it affects our relationships with family. We also discuss the difference between living with family vs. living with roommates and moving in with a man.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.000 a question for the the girl so you're you're 29 i don't i'm sorry how old did you guys say you are
00:00:05.920 you're i'm 19. oh wow you're very young yeah 26 26 26 okay so i know you guys said right now
00:00:15.360 you wouldn't um you'd rather live with roommates than a man right that's not
00:00:23.520 is the way that you phrased the question you were asking us like how like where would we have to be
00:00:26.800 in our lives to be reliant on a man and his income and i think phrasing it that way like okay okay
00:00:33.280 fine fine fine but like when when there's a recession if you had to make a choice right if
00:00:38.320 if your income was getting slim you would pick family over a man yeah right i have the 1.00
00:00:47.040 i have the option to do that so yeah if i was in a relationship that's different but i have the
00:00:52.720 option okay so so let's say like you lose your job tomorrow and you have to think i either have
00:00:56.880 to move home or i have to get into a relationship right right right now right now right now right
00:01:03.760 right right now you would pick moving home or moving in with a roommate that's that's what you
00:01:08.480 guys said earlier i would i would i would suggest that to be fair if you had no income coming in
00:01:13.760 moving in with a guy you don't really know what his real financial circumstances and you might become
00:01:18.880 a bit of a burden and that might actually crash the relationship yeah home i'm not i'm just asking
00:01:25.760 yeah home first i'm not responding to this question i just my question is would that change if you were
00:01:33.200 older if i was older like if this happened at 32 33 34 35 would you ever start prioritizing relationships
00:01:42.080 over um like moving home or moving in with roommates me personally no i like i don't view really or
00:01:48.800 i don't even get into relationships where um money is a main proponent of that like i i it's nice if
00:01:56.640 we can go out on like dates and we go out to eat and we're going we're having a great time and things
00:02:01.840 like that but i'm also fine with like picnics in the car and it's just cheese and crackers like you
00:02:06.560 know like like it doesn't always have to be well i'm not even talking about dates i was talking about rent
00:02:10.880 yeah like you're right like you're in a situation your rent needs to cut in half you either find a
00:02:18.800 man or you go home right exactly so i'm just trying to put it together like there's just no situation
00:02:23.760 where like even when i'm making money where i'm going to be financially relying on a man i'm definitely
00:02:28.560 not going to do it when i'm when i'm not like i i personally i would go with my family do you want kids
00:02:34.160 no oh you don't want kids okay okay well then fair enough then you don't need it yeah yeah i mean
00:02:41.040 i feel like because even you asked earlier like how how do i feel about being 60 years old
00:02:46.400 do i have a man or do i have a roommate i mean being 16 and having a roommate we're just out here
00:02:51.120 you know pushing little kids hitting people with our canes like that sounds like a good time like 1.00
00:02:54.720 you can say that sounds like child abuse
00:03:04.480 i'm just curious have you always felt like that um you know different relationships have shown me
00:03:10.160 different things so i have been in relationships with men where i was like okay i could have children
00:03:14.960 with you i can see us moving in that direction i can see us getting married i can see us owning the
00:03:19.280 house i can see us reproducing and and like creating a legacy that way um but it's not in
00:03:26.880 every relationship and even now that i'm single like i'm definitely not pursuing that okay but for
00:03:32.000 it sounds like for the right guy you still would yeah yeah yeah would you say like your intentions
00:03:38.000 changed before you met someone so like did you think oh i'd never want to have kids before i met
00:03:43.520 someone and then you got in a relationship and you're like actually maybe i would change my mindset or
00:03:48.240 was it always i'll never have kids in relationship you're like i'll never have kids and it got to
00:03:52.240 like a certain point and you're like actually like it so it was more so like i don't know i don't know
00:04:00.000 how to get into this without saying like i i have both of our families are pretty large right all
00:04:05.200 together there's 10 grandchildren right and so we grew up in a yeah like yeah summers at grandma's house
00:04:10.080 were always super fun and um seeing sort of like the effect that our parents had on us and like on
00:04:17.280 our other cousins and things like that it was just kind of like i don't want to have that effect on
00:04:20.160 people um and so when i got into a relationship and i was like oh if we got together and we were
00:04:26.000 taking care of kids we wouldn't have that effect on people we could actually build like a very like
00:04:31.120 beautiful prosperous like family like i was like okay okay i can see myself doing that but otherwise
00:04:35.680 it's just kind of like i can see us recreating like you were saying before generational trauma like i can
00:04:40.480 see us recreating a generational trauma and that's not something i want to do that's a negative way to look at life
00:04:44.560 yeah can i ask a quick question that no no no because you're looking at you're looking at the
00:04:50.320 worst case scenario but did you say um yeah did you say your life is not full of rainbows and sunshines
00:04:57.680 like it's not gonna be like all good all the time i know bad all the time you're gonna have to
00:05:02.720 have a balance of both yeah so to just look at the wrong that's happened to you it's like but did you
00:05:09.520 say you were from a family that like i'm not sure if you said your parents were still together or
00:05:14.240 so my parents are still together my parents are divorced yeah and there's so my my mom is her
00:05:20.080 brother her sister yeah so yeah but there's only two of them so two people made 10 grandchildren yeah
00:05:28.560 no that's surprising yeah obviously because obviously it was the whole what you said i would
00:05:34.560 would have expected it to be the opposite obviously where you said that you come from um your parents
00:05:39.600 are still together i would have expected the opposite where you would have said um you would
00:05:43.760 you would have want children because obviously from what your parents you've got two large families and
00:05:48.160 when it's come to like comes to festive events you're all together that's why i was surprised when
00:05:52.480 you said that's why i asked the question like the opposite yeah i'm the one who wants kids yeah and
00:05:57.120 it's funny to see like obviously generational like children everyone experiences it yeah yeah i i i i
00:06:04.080 hear this question i've heard it on your podcast before um but nobody's ever like mentioned the fact
00:06:08.720 that the process of having kids is like having kids raising children yeah the best of your ability
00:06:14.640 you know without obviously going too far field and fucking it all up i'm scared and then you get old 0.97
00:06:20.240 and your children look after you like what happens when you get old with no kids who's going to look after
00:06:25.200 you and i think this brings up a good point that we were making before you you mentioned community
00:06:30.480 and you were talking about how you would like your partner to help you build your community with you
00:06:34.960 and i assume like you're you and your partner have kids and that creates your community me personally
00:06:40.320 like i i build my community with like my church when i'm going out to friends i go to like a chess club
00:06:45.840 like uh even like my work friends and things like that like those people are my my main community and
00:06:50.720 i'm not necessarily expecting them to um like be by my bedside feeding me porridge when i'm you
00:06:56.880 know i can't they might come to that time i'm sorry yeah but if you need that i'm sorry if you
00:07:02.960 have a question i have a question you said so your church community that's where you'd find like
00:07:08.960 that sense of community when you're old interesting um currently right now i'm still like looking for
00:07:15.440 churches that align with how i personally experience christianity but yes like i'm looking for a church
00:07:22.080 that would allow me to do that that would allow me to like rely on people work with people if i needed
00:07:27.040 food and i'm 60 and i or i mean 60 is kind of young less like yeah yeah like i'm 80 and i can't afford
00:07:34.240 do you think that's realistic to expect a church to take care of you when you're old this is what i'm
00:07:38.320 saying i'm looking for the right church and i'm looking for the right community like i'm still i don't
00:07:42.320 necessarily have my decrepit 80 year old community yet but that's what i'm building it i'm building
00:07:48.880 and also she has a sizable family like i will have children my brother will yeah her kids can take 1.00
00:07:55.360 care of me are you honestly going to be like sorry but are you honestly going to be as happy as you
00:08:01.840 think that let's say you're 60 or 75 do you honestly believe you're going to be as happy like let's
00:08:08.720 say for example you have children and those children that let's say you're 75 years old you
00:08:13.600 know let's say for example your husband ain't there but you have your children who are going to look
00:08:17.440 after you they're going to come and if you need some shopping they're going to come and shop for
00:08:21.440 you and all of that do you want anything you don't want that at 75 because like let me let me keep it
00:08:27.280 real they might even at 75 mandem out there you know the mandem you're looking at right now they're not
00:08:33.760 going to look at you when you're 75 i'm sorry they're going to stop looking at you when you're 50
00:08:38.480 maybe even 40. right push it at 35 you feel me i'm sorry but like like do you honestly believe
00:08:46.000 like keep in mind from like 30 is that someone's phone sorry his phone was going off so i'm going
00:08:51.600 a bit of a rant but like do you honestly whoever's phone that is step off camera and turn it off we said
00:08:56.080 to turn the phones off before the show but go ahead i don't know whose phone that is sound like a weird
00:09:00.080 mario game yeah yeah mad taste but like honestly do you sit in there yeah okay i don't i don't know
00:09:07.840 whose it was okay okay go ahead yeah sorry but do you honestly believe like after the age of 35
00:09:15.760 like keep in mind women in general they look for a certain type of man you feel me like if a man who's 1.00
00:09:22.640 five foot two looks like a bowling ball you know it's like it's smelly and all of that if he walks up to
00:09:27.920 you you're not going to give him the time of day you feel me so you want a certain type of man okay
00:09:32.960 right and whatever your standards are understand that certain type of man he's going to look for a
00:09:39.200 certain type of woman and i'm so sorry to tell you this and i hope i don't get cancelled for this 0.97
00:09:46.560 but usually women over 35 they ain't the type of man they're looking for sorry they're not the type of 0.99
00:09:51.280 woman they're looking for you feel me so do you honestly believe when you get parts sorry how old
00:09:56.320 are you 26 you've lived 26 years of your life already you feel me do you honestly and do you
00:10:03.760 know how long 26 years are you know because you've lived 26 years you feel me when you get to that 50
00:10:09.600 you're going to live up to like 75 80. do you honestly believe that time by yourself is going to be
00:10:15.680 an enjoyable time um so yeah so i want to bring up a couple of points that you mentioned so first
00:10:20.560 things first like i don't want to bring kids into this world with the intention of having somebody
00:10:26.080 to take care of me okay so it's not why you have children as many of you know i was just banned on
00:10:34.560 tick tock and we are demonetized on a daily basis on this platform if you want to help please consider
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