JustPearlyThings - August 01, 2023


These Modern Women Got TRIGGERED By This


Episode Stats


Length

15 minutes

Words per minute

212.86525

Word count

3,254

Sentence count

272

Harmful content

Misogyny

32

sentences flagged

Hate speech

26

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, we discuss what it means to be a good wife and why it s important to have a good husband. We also talk about the importance of a good father figure in a relationship and how important it is for women to be good wives.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 I've got a question for you, for the women, yeah? 1.00
00:00:02.100 Would you women agree or disagree that the more a man has to kind of do in the relationship
00:00:08.820 is like the less you kind of like him as a person?
00:00:12.640 Say that again. 0.71
00:00:13.220 What do you mean?
00:00:13.700 So, for instance, if he has to do the most, big wedding, big this, big that.
00:00:18.160 He's lacking.
00:00:19.240 He's kind of lacking, because without that, you said you have to be in love with him 100%
00:00:23.460 and all these other factors.
00:00:24.780 Whereas, if you really just, you mess with him as an individual,
00:00:28.520 he doesn't really have to do the extras.
00:00:31.180 Because I notice, if I'm not someone's cup of tea,
00:00:33.940 I might have to jump through a hoop or two.
00:00:36.120 If I'm her cup of tea, we're chilling on biscuits.
00:00:40.480 It's all good.
00:00:41.040 Do you know what I mean?
00:00:41.800 So, there's a difference.
00:00:42.960 So, would you guys agree or disagree with that?
00:00:45.240 Basically, I think what he's saying is, you said that you would do the courthouse
00:00:48.440 if you loved him 100%.
00:00:50.360 Let's say you loved him 70%.
00:00:52.100 Then I wouldn't get married to someone I loved 70%.
00:00:53.460 Does he have to do the white wedding? 0.65
00:00:55.320 70% is high, though.
00:00:56.580 I think you're right.
00:00:59.820 The more you have to do for a girl, the less she probably does like you.
00:01:03.400 Yeah, fucks.
00:01:04.260 Yeah, because when you're really into a girl, you're always thinking about what he wants,
00:01:08.800 what he needs.
00:01:09.100 You're happy just to be around him.
00:01:10.480 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:01:12.280 Listen to Amanda, man.
00:01:13.680 Listen to that, because if you're doing the most, it means you don't like me.
00:01:16.080 She's not into you like that, for real.
00:01:18.300 And you set a president as well to say, you know what?
00:01:20.520 For you to be with me, I have to come with all these things.
00:01:22.580 Men don't realize how valuable their attention is.
00:01:26.540 Because I think women would not, we would not survive without male attention. 0.98
00:01:30.360 If men treated their attention like it was valuable, women would have a very different behavior. 1.00
00:01:34.960 Yeah, guys throw attention at turnips.
00:01:37.440 I've been watching Capybara TikToks for a long time. 0.79
00:01:39.880 You know the animal, the Capybara?
00:01:43.680 I don't know what that is.
00:01:44.720 No, seriously, imagine if every guy said, you know what, I'm not going to accept a girl
00:01:49.600 that has slept with double-digit people. 0.93
00:01:51.880 I'm not going to accept women that are overweight. 1.00
00:01:55.580 I'm not going to accept women with children out of wedlock. 1.00
00:01:59.400 Women would make different decisions. 1.00
00:02:02.120 Like, imagine if women would not leave their husbands if they didn't think there was a simp 1.00
00:02:06.360 waiting for them.
00:02:07.160 They would not, women would not, they would stay. 1.00
00:02:10.900 But it's like, because men will give their attention, which is so, it is so valuable.
00:02:16.540 Like, we cannot survive without male attention.
00:02:19.220 That's why women without dads, like, they're messed up. 1.00
00:02:22.680 Because they didn't get that male attention, so they have to go somewhere else.
00:02:26.660 Male attention is valuable. 0.87
00:02:28.440 And if men were more selective with who they gave it to, I think women would be better in a way.
00:02:33.720 Yeah, that's true.
00:02:35.980 But doesn't that link to the whole thing where, there was a thing where it's like, guys only go as far in terms of courting as women allow.
00:02:44.720 Oh, true.
00:02:45.400 So like, so like back in the day, Victorian times, why did everyone back then used to court and used to wear like the big corsets and have to date someone for like two months before you could even see the bottom of their legs?
00:02:56.460 No, it's not, it's not, no, it's not the men's responsibility.
00:02:59.880 Yeah, it's the women's. 0.98
00:03:00.620 Like, no, it's the sexual market, like the, the purity of, of women is the women's responsibility because we're in control of sex. 1.00
00:03:06.600 Exactly, yeah.
00:03:07.140 But I do think that the, the quality, I don't want to say quality, but like men, they'll, they'll still wife women that have no business being wife. 0.98
00:03:16.960 That should be in the streets forever or that have had, like, if you have two different baby daddies, why is anybody marrying you? 0.93
00:03:22.520 Leave you in the streets.
00:03:23.140 Why is any, leave, like.
00:03:24.860 What was the name of the, the girl of, the basketball player, Brittany, Brittany Renner?
00:03:30.340 Yeah.
00:03:30.820 Brittany Renner, friend of the show.
00:03:32.040 Brittany Renner, she's one of those girls in, in that type of, type of situation where it's like, you know her past so well that like, there's no way.
00:03:40.360 Do you think, some women can just be really unlucky, like they fell for somebody. 1.00
00:03:44.220 She's not one of those women. 1.00
00:03:45.400 No, I think that's an excuse.
00:03:47.160 I think that's an excuse.
00:03:49.200 You choose what you do with your own body.
00:03:52.140 In the same argument as you were saying earlier about if you should have children or not, and you said, oh, it's a woman's body, I imagine you were referring to abortion and, and you have the right.
00:04:00.540 I think you're in complete control.
00:04:02.380 So, you have complete control to not open your legs to every man.
00:04:06.040 Yeah, but people get divorced too. 1.00
00:04:08.240 But there's people that have like two, three marriages.
00:04:10.280 And that's not even like a small amount.
00:04:12.000 A lot of people get divorced.
00:04:12.860 I'm not even trying to be like.
00:04:13.460 What's the percentage of the women? 1.00
00:04:14.440 No, no, no.
00:04:14.980 Yeah, but the women are the ones divorcing. 1.00
00:04:17.140 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:04:17.680 Like.
00:04:18.060 Yeah, I mean, there's definitely a part of playing that.
00:04:20.860 A part.
00:04:21.620 No, but what I was trying to say is, if I have a relationship with a, with a female, and I'm with her for five years and I have a child, and then I have a relationship with someone else.
00:04:30.280 For a year and I have a child, like, I'm talking vice versa.
00:04:34.200 Okay, okay, okay, I have a really good solution here.
00:04:36.740 Okay.
00:04:37.500 Don't have sex with people you don't want to have kids with.
00:04:40.000 Trust.
00:04:41.060 Or, you know, use birth control of some sort.
00:04:44.820 Condoms.
00:04:45.260 Yeah, you know, there's, there's like a billion different forms.
00:04:47.680 You can pick one.
00:04:48.880 And maybe, you know, if you have a kid with someone, stay.
00:04:52.280 Yeah.
00:04:52.400 Those are three valuable, very valuable options.
00:04:55.480 But you can't say if you're not unhappy just because you have a family.
00:04:57.280 But what about the kid's happiness?
00:04:58.600 Why does everyone always go to their own happiness?
00:05:00.760 Yeah.
00:05:00.900 What about the kid's happiness?
00:05:02.160 Children who come from single-parent homes, unfortunately, statistically, are worse off.
00:05:06.240 That is a fact.
00:05:07.400 True.
00:05:07.720 So you are going against the odds for the sake of your, you're going, you're forcing your child's life against the odds for the sake of your momentary happiness.
00:05:15.860 Happiness is a feeling, they last temporary, like all feelings, whereas that child's development is permanent because of the way that the brain develops.
00:05:24.500 Everything that happens in childhood is a building block.
00:05:26.220 Like, if you have a kid that's in a single mother home, she's more likely to go to jail. 0.99
00:05:29.500 She's more likely to drop out of school.
00:05:30.740 They're more likely to be sexually abused by the stepdad. 0.77
00:05:33.860 They're more likely to have mental health issues.
00:05:36.980 Every, she's right, every statistical disadvantage you could put your kid at, you're putting them at what?
00:05:41.440 Because you're not happy?
00:05:42.740 Yeah.
00:05:43.080 You're in control of your happiness.
00:05:44.380 And that's it, that's when we get into the maturing thing.
00:05:47.060 Happiness is, it's not, it's, it's that, like happiness kind of has to take a back seat.
00:05:50.940 Yeah.
00:05:51.220 Yeah, yeah, because not everything's going to be happy all the time.
00:05:53.780 I hear it, but at the same time.
00:05:55.220 It depends though, because abuse, abuse is, abuse, abuse, I think male or female, if you're in an abusive relationship, whether it's verbal, abuse is the difference of being unhappy.
00:06:05.340 No, but that plays in unhappiness.
00:06:06.900 That plays in unhappiness.
00:06:07.940 Wait, wait, wait, wait, but this is propaganda though.
00:06:10.840 They probably, like, they put this in the media, like, we're so afraid of these men that are just,
00:06:14.380 just abusing women all the time. 0.77
00:06:15.920 It's like 5%, if that, of men that commit the majority of the crimes.
00:06:20.480 And what percent of them are incarcerated?
00:06:23.200 Yet women pick man that's incarcerated. 1.00
00:06:26.060 Women pick these dangerous men. 1.00
00:06:28.160 They're like a bad boy.
00:06:28.980 Yeah, and then why when it happens?
00:06:31.080 The thrill.
00:06:31.400 So it's like, am I, am I going to feel bad for you that you picked a bad, that's who you picked?
00:06:35.460 You made a kid with him.
00:06:36.320 Work it out.
00:06:37.200 Decisions have consequences.
00:06:38.460 And you need to realize, like, decisions that you make, not, because a lot of times, a lot of people need to realize that the decisions that you make don't only just affect you.
00:06:46.100 They affect everyone around you.
00:06:48.100 And I see it.
00:06:48.760 Like, today when we had, we had four girls come on the show for, like, the cat lady or wife show. 1.00
00:06:54.820 And I think, did all four come from single mother homes?
00:06:58.920 I think all four, either three out of four or four did.
00:07:01.640 And you can see it in the way they view relationships.
00:07:03.780 Like, they all say partnership.
00:07:06.080 Like, they don't even understand that husband and wife is a role.
00:07:09.220 It's like they don't know basic things.
00:07:11.140 And then it's like, you get these kids that have never seen a functioning relationship, then our generation can't have relationships.
00:07:16.880 There's so many problems that come with that.
00:07:18.820 Like, homelessness, drug addiction.
00:07:20.900 There's so many issues that come as a result of single mother homes. 1.00
00:07:26.440 And a lot of times, it leads to the birth rate declining.
00:07:30.420 Because now, I think we're at, like, 1.4 kids per woman.
00:07:33.960 They're predicting that 50% of women are going to be single and childless.
00:07:37.520 So now, more women that hit 30 are not going to have kids than have them in the next couple of years. 1.00
00:07:43.160 Yeah.
00:07:43.720 It's like that thing where, you know, when people say, like, someone who bullies is someone who's just being bullied in another situation.
00:07:50.900 You can liken that to the situation.
00:07:54.760 Because it's like, if one person sees a bad relationship and they don't know how to do a bad relationship, all they will know is what they've seen and what they know to be true from the immediate surroundings.
00:08:07.520 Now, if the immediate surroundings are negative and every example of a relationship is all negative, the only idea of a relationship that they have in their head is most likely going to refer back to negative.
00:08:18.300 Yes, they will have the positive ones from movies and stuff, but they only know negative.
00:08:22.040 Also, it's also about, like, the way that behavior, the way that humans behave is based off of what they know.
00:08:27.480 We can only behave off of what we know.
00:08:29.220 Exactly.
00:08:29.360 Like, if you go back to when we were, is it, like, hunter-gatherer times?
00:08:32.720 Like, that, we, our brain maps stuff out.
00:08:35.900 So, if you've only seen bad stuff, like you say, you might see good stuff in the movies, but you're not the one actually going through the experience.
00:08:42.620 You're going to repeat that pattern of unhealthy relationships because it's all that your brain has actually experienced.
00:08:49.480 And it doesn't even have to be.
00:08:50.700 But sometimes you can do the complete opposite because you've been, you were raised in that household and you saw, and you're like, this is how I don't want my marriage.
00:08:58.740 Of course, of course, of course.
00:08:59.940 You can, but statistically, they don't.
00:09:03.220 Yeah, it's hard.
00:09:04.140 Like, why do you think, we don't even have to look at stats to know this.
00:09:07.560 Why do we say that girls have daddy issues? 1.00
00:09:10.760 There are ramifications for not having functioning, happy relationships.
00:09:14.520 And I also think it turns men into simps where they don't know how to deal with women because, like, they've never seen a masculine man lead in a relationship.
00:09:22.600 But then you have all the women complaining that there's no masculine men. 0.90
00:09:25.100 It's like trying to explain the color red to someone who's colorblind.
00:09:27.480 If you've never seen the color red, how do you explain it?
00:09:29.600 Like, have you seen, have you guys heard of the, the inmates and the, the, the prisoners and the, um, the guards' psychological, like, experiment that happened, that they did?
00:09:39.920 Oh, the, um, Stanford prison experiment experiment.
00:09:41.640 The Stanford one.
00:09:42.260 So I met, I met the guy who, Zimmerman, Zimmerman, Zimmerman?
00:09:44.360 Yeah, something like that.
00:09:45.560 Right, so this experiment, essentially, like, they, they had a, a room full of people, they split them in half, students.
00:09:51.980 Half of them were, um, um, inmates and the other half were guards.
00:09:55.100 And they realized, after a certain amount of time, the guards started acting like actual guards.
00:09:59.920 And the prisoners started acting like actual prisoners.
00:10:02.120 And they started to have, like, an actual power disparity.
00:10:04.060 And they had to shut it down.
00:10:04.700 And they had to shut it down early.
00:10:06.220 Because the, the, the, the guards were, like, really taking it in as, like, this is their life.
00:10:11.380 And these people are actually, I, actually villainous people.
00:10:14.960 The reason I bring this up is to show, like, this is a real-life psychological example of what it looks like to be surrounded by images of things that you don't really understand.
00:10:24.320 It's, it's an example of, like, being surrounded by a negative image of what you think should happen.
00:10:30.520 And only going off your idea of what is, what it should happen.
00:10:34.660 And seeing how the human mind goes with that.
00:10:38.260 Because they were quick to take on the roles of prisoner and jailer.
00:10:42.420 Wasn't it, like, three days?
00:10:43.580 It was, like, three to five days or something.
00:10:45.600 And they flipped.
00:10:46.480 They were, they were going to kill these people.
00:10:48.240 Like, people were, like, locked up in solitary confinement.
00:10:50.640 So, it, it goes to show, the reason I bring it up is to show that, like, the psychological, the psychology of human beings is so, like, fragile.
00:10:59.900 Yeah, I was going to say frigid or, like, fragile.
00:11:01.860 That, like, things around you that you see every day that you don't even realize that you see or hear or you experience shape you, right?
00:11:09.620 So, to continuously show kids, right?
00:11:12.240 Because I'm, like, I've seen it myself.
00:11:13.940 There's so much single-parent stuff shown.
00:11:17.520 There was a period of time where single-parent stuff was shown a lot, right?
00:11:21.540 And it just becomes something that's, like, very natural and very all right.
00:11:25.840 Which shows that, like...
00:11:27.220 Even in fairy tales, like Cinderella, they never...
00:11:30.220 They never.
00:11:30.800 They never.
00:11:32.680 Like, they always remarry someone and the stepmoms always, like, disgusting.
00:11:37.100 But you never really talk about the mom because you always pass or something.
00:11:39.920 Yeah.
00:11:40.120 And it's always, like, one of those ones where single-parent's, like, lifestyle had been pushed, not, like, directly, but, like, indirectly in different ways of, like, if you notice it, then you notice it type of thing.
00:11:51.360 I just think that modern women are selfish when it comes to their kids. 1.00
00:11:54.380 They care about themselves more than their kids.
00:11:56.280 Yeah.
00:11:56.560 And I think it's really sad.
00:11:57.880 And I think it actually ruins society because when you put yourself before your kids, you mean you put your generation before the next generation.
00:12:06.460 But are there enough...
00:12:07.940 Okay, let me backtrack a bit.
00:12:10.060 So, to the point of, like, people that are not having kids, right?
00:12:15.760 Do you reckon there's enough women that have passed that point of being able to get pregnant that are actually speaking to younger women and saying, all right, listen.
00:12:25.360 Because that involves swallowing their pride and they don't want to do that.
00:12:27.880 But there's enough guys saying, hey, get your act together.
00:12:30.540 You know, you need money.
00:12:31.780 You need to do this.
00:12:32.720 You need networks.
00:12:33.220 You need to be able to defend yourself.
00:12:35.860 I feel like there's enough guys doing that.
00:12:39.380 I just want to know from the women, are there women that are doing that? 1.00
00:12:41.740 No.
00:12:42.220 No, there's a fundamental difference between guys and girls.
00:12:44.480 Guys will give guys genuine advice.
00:12:46.120 Girls won't. 1.00
00:12:46.900 Have you heard the whole phrase...
00:12:47.980 No, because girls compete with each other. 1.00
00:12:49.700 Because if you're 25 and the girl that's 38, you're competing with her for the same guy.
00:12:54.220 You've heard the phrase, a guy will insult a guy and not mean it.
00:12:58.240 A girl will compliment a girl and not mean it.
00:13:00.060 Yeah.
00:13:00.840 So it's one of those ones where those older girls you would think would give those advice might say to you, oh, you're so pretty, you should do this.
00:13:07.140 But like, they don't mean it.
00:13:08.820 It's like when you see girls like commenting on obese girls' pictures like, beautiful, love it. 0.78
00:13:15.280 Like, what are you doing?
00:13:16.440 It's not beautiful.
00:13:17.800 Why are you encouraging her?
00:13:21.580 Yeah, because look, I say it like this, yeah.
00:13:24.100 With men, I don't care.
00:13:26.920 Like, you look at even Kevin, yeah.
00:13:29.560 I didn't care about the delivery because he's not talking to me directly.
00:13:32.600 People call up and, you know, they go.
00:13:34.100 Oh, yeah.
00:13:34.380 But if you're not talking to that person directly, you can see the delivery and look at that as entertainment, but you can still take the message.
00:13:42.080 I think with women, it needs to be dissected in a way that makes them feel. 1.00
00:13:44.860 Directly to them, specifically for them.
00:13:47.380 They've got to feel great about it to receive it.
00:13:51.240 Whereas with guys, generally speaking, I'll just be like, cool.
00:13:54.800 Yeah, what he's saying makes sense.
00:13:56.740 And you move on, yeah.
00:13:57.640 And I apply it or I don't apply it.
00:13:59.660 Do you know what I mean?
00:14:00.100 But I believe there's enough men out there giving that direction.
00:14:02.800 And I think, you know, just from the conversations that we've had here just through on the panel, you know, is it working for you to, if you want, if you know what you want kids and you want this kind of, you want a certain kind of lifestyle, you want things, is the way you're moving working for you?
00:14:17.780 And if it isn't, do you have people in your life that are saying that you can talk to that haven't had kids and they can say, boom, all right, look, you know, time's ticking.
00:14:26.880 It will get to this point.
00:14:27.700 And this is how I feel now that I waited and I'm here.
00:14:31.080 Yeah, but you know what it is with that?
00:14:33.700 The biggest enemy to women most times is other women. 1.00
00:14:38.600 Because we can't even admit there's a problem.
00:14:41.880 Other women are the downfall of women for a lot of the time because they will be the ones who will feed you the stuff that you want to hear in one side, knowing good and damn well that's not the advice you need to hear. 1.00
00:14:52.660 And then watch you walk out that door and make that mistake.
00:14:55.280 And then laugh at it.
00:14:56.000 Sometimes it.
00:14:56.060 Sometimes it happens.
00:14:56.180 Sometimes it happens.
00:14:56.320 Sometimes it happens.
00:14:56.700 Sometimes it happens.
00:14:58.280 Don't take a look at it.
00:14:58.480 Sometimes.
00:14:58.800 Sometimes it happens.
00:14:59.060 Sometimes it happens.
00:15:00.800 Sometimes.
00:15:02.780 Sometimes it happens.
00:15:03.200 Sometimes.
00:15:03.440 Sometimes it happens.
00:15:04.440 Sometimes it happens.
00:15:04.760 Sometimes it happens.
00:15:05.380 Sometimes it happens.
00:15:05.880 Sometimes it happens.
00:15:06.060 Sometimes it happens.
00:15:06.700 Sometimes it happens.
00:15:08.020 Sometimes it happens.
00:15:08.740 Sometimes it happens.
00:15:08.880 Sometimes it happens.
00:15:09.060 Sometimes it happens.
00:15:10.000 Sometimes it happens.
00:15:11.840 Sometimes it happens.
00:15:12.180 Sometimes it happens.
00:15:12.340 Sometimes it happens.
00:15:13.080 Sometimes it happens.