JustPearlyThings - These Types Of Women Are Selfish Moms

00:00:00.000 Why cannot older women adopt children and have a family? 1.00

00:00:03.940 More women probably might want to adopt, because honestly, childbirth hurts. 1.00

00:00:07.380 It's a painful thing and it hurts.

00:00:09.420 It's a beautiful and magical experience.

00:00:11.920 I understand, but if you cannot have a baby and you want to have one, why can't it hurt?

00:00:16.340 I think it's selfish as a single woman to adopt.

00:00:19.180 You're going to put your kid at every statistical disadvantage because you want a kid 0.99

00:00:24.060 instead of letting that kid grow up in a two-parent household.

00:00:26.840 Why would you choose that?

00:00:27.900 It's not necessarily, she's single, she's just older because she was focusing on the career.

00:00:31.840 She was asked to pay 50-50 for things, right?

00:00:33.920 If she's married, then I think that's one thing.

00:00:36.740 But I also think most men want a wife for kids.

00:00:39.920 But do you know what kids...

00:00:40.700 So it's kind of like, what do they get out of it then?

00:00:42.680 Let me say this, adoption is imperative.

00:00:46.080 Do you know what kids go through in the foster care field?

00:00:48.720 You know, I actually, I do because I've been on both ends of adoption

00:00:52.320 where my parents, they gave up one of my brothers and they actually adopted a different one.

00:00:56.040 So we've actually been on both ends.

00:00:58.880 Because one brother, my parents gave up when my mom was 17, same parents, but they gave him up for adoption.

00:01:04.780 I met him when I was 22, grew up with a completely different family.

00:01:08.240 And we also adopted teenagers that were in the foster care system.

00:01:11.920 The problem is not giving up kids for adoption.

00:01:15.160 It's actually, if you give an infant up for adoption,

00:01:18.160 you're most likely going to find a family that wants to adopt them.

00:01:20.900 The issue is these crackhead moms will keep the kid for like five years and the government will take them. 1.00

00:01:27.160 And now what parent is going to want a kid that's been basically...

00:01:30.280 Fucked up.

00:01:30.920 Yeah, it's fucked up.

00:01:31.920 Because by the time they're three, their brain's fully developed.

00:01:34.200 And I've been on both ends.

00:01:36.520 Like they, I know a couple that adopted two brothers.

00:01:39.400 One brother was five.

00:01:40.800 One brother was like two or one and a half when they adopted him.

00:01:43.900 The older brother, it was like they couldn't, even though they're super nice parents,

00:01:48.040 like he was too developed and like he ended up stealing from them.

00:01:51.720 He always in and out of trouble.

00:01:52.960 The younger brother was like a musical genius.

00:01:55.160 I actually...

00:01:55.760 So it really just depends on the age.

00:01:56.780 So I actually, straight out of college, that was my first job, right?

00:02:00.240 Foster care, social worker, right?

00:02:02.580 Case manager or whatever like that.

00:02:04.100 Grew up with the foster care.

00:02:05.800 We always adopted different family members and stuff.

00:02:08.280 Like grew up in this, around this, seen stories and all that.

00:02:11.660 It is imperative for adoptions to happen because when people give up these kids,

00:02:15.720 you see them crackhead moms or whatever like that. 1.00

00:02:18.040 These kids, when they're not adopted, whether it's by a single woman or not,

00:02:21.080 they go through the system.

00:02:22.220 They jump from home to home.

00:02:23.420 A lot of them are beaten, molested, essayed.

00:02:26.220 All types of things happen to them just from being in the system.

00:02:29.980 So I would rather a kid be adopted by a single woman than to be in the system messed up.

00:02:35.680 Now growing up with mental health issues because they've been bounced around from home to home to all types of things.

00:02:42.080 But typically, like in the situations I've seen, the single women typically want young children. 1.00

00:02:46.340 And I think in that situation, it's quite, I just think it's quite selfish to like pick,

00:02:52.260 to have a kid at every statistical disadvantage when it should be in a two-parent household.

00:02:56.380 If you could give a kid love, give them love.

00:02:57.860 I understand like giving them love.

00:03:00.240 And sure, like maybe for the kids that have nowhere else to go.

00:03:04.320 But I just think if you're going to take a baby where they could be in a two-parent household,

00:03:09.760 I think it's better to be in a two-parent household.

00:03:11.960 I don't know why you would bring them up in a situation where they're at a disadvantage.

00:03:16.480 And there's so many two parents that want to adopt.

00:03:19.560 But taking a kid, so infants are the high, like that's the most requested.

00:03:23.920 Because again, you can mold that infant into who you need them to be there.

00:03:26.940 You know, they're in your household.

00:03:28.120 My brother was still pretty similar to us, even though I didn't meet him until I was 22.

00:03:32.020 No, but it's like working in, like they let you know that like most people are going to go for an infant.

00:03:37.240 It is so hard to, it's hard to place older kids because like you said, they're developing into whoever they are.

00:03:43.080 But it's still like infants, whoever, it's still just get the kids out of there. 0.88

00:03:47.340 Kids don't ask to be here.

00:03:48.760 But I think the better solution is for women to get married and stay married. 1.00

00:03:54.220 Because that's where we're seeing a lot of these, there are a lot of men.

00:03:58.520 Women are too picky. 1.00

00:03:59.980 That's the problem.

00:04:00.680 You have average overweight women. 1.00

00:04:02.080 The average woman's 170 pounds, it's overweight, fat, and yet they think they deserve like men that make a lot of money. 1.00

00:04:09.160 The average woman's had over 10 partners. 1.00

00:04:12.260 This is based on different studies.

00:04:14.020 The average, so they don't bring purity anymore.

00:04:17.720 They don't bring youth.

00:04:18.420 The average bride is 31. 0.94

00:04:19.920 So 90% of your OGs are gone by 31.

00:04:22.860 Yeah, a woman's standards of course change. 1.00

00:04:24.320 When you're younger, you want this whole list.

00:04:26.140 When you get older, you realize you need to chop that list down, right?

00:04:28.580 Yeah, because your value goes down.

00:04:29.840 But there still has to be enough men for these women. 1.00

00:04:33.540 There has to be enough men that fit the criteria for these women as far as, again, being single.

00:04:38.060 One out of three men are either virgins or having sex in the past year.

00:04:42.680 So they're single men.

00:04:44.400 But having sex doesn't mean that you're not in a relationship.

00:04:47.160 Look at Ciara and Russell Wilson.

00:04:49.060 They didn't have sex, though.

00:04:50.040 They didn't have, Russell didn't have sex.

00:04:52.000 They waited until marriage, right?

00:04:53.240 That's fine.

00:04:53.600 That's fine.

00:04:54.160 But that's what I'm saying.

00:04:55.900 I just don't, there's no excuses.

00:04:58.440 I just don't like the excuses.

00:05:01.920 More to more place excuses.

00:05:03.820 The world will be a beautiful place.

00:05:05.300 Yeah, I'm saying like, I think the goal should be to get married and stay married.

00:05:08.980 I think that would solve a lot of these problems.

00:05:10.460 But women want to get married. 1.00

00:05:11.600 If men are not asking women to marry them. 0.70

00:05:12.840 No, I would say women are the ones pushing off marriage because men will always want young women. 0.99

00:05:18.900 They're biologically, even just from a smell test, like men are biologically predispositioned to like young fertile women. 0.91

00:05:25.120 So when the men are looking for wives, the young women don't want to get married because women have the most power when they're young. 1.00

00:05:32.200 And we choose to not get married until we're older.

00:05:34.220 Are young men looking for these young women?

00:05:36.220 Or is it older men looking for these younger women?

00:05:38.240 But you can't, but you can't both.

00:05:40.020 Yeah, she's right.

00:05:40.600 But you can always date older.

00:05:43.660 You have the most sexual power when you are young as a woman. 1.00

00:05:48.260 But most women, right, when they're in a relationship and they're waiting, when most women are in a relationship, right, 1.00

00:05:53.380 and they're waiting for their man to ask them to marry them, what is the most common excuse?

00:05:58.260 I have to get myself together first.

00:06:00.400 I need to make sure financially, career-wise.

00:06:02.240 That's the woman's choice, though, because she could date older. 0.99

00:06:05.900 When you are young, you can date older.

00:06:07.640 And if you don't choose to, that's exactly.

00:06:10.400 But at 25, are other 25-year-old men ready to get married?

00:06:14.820 Are they waiting to be happy, right?

00:06:16.740 So date 35-year-old men.

00:06:18.320 Like, I just can't be excused.

00:06:19.240 But it's not excuses.

00:06:22.040 It's real life.

00:06:23.240 Because then more women would be married. 1.00

00:06:25.520 But the problem is, but the question is, okay, if you have a product, if you're a company,

00:06:30.080 and you're selling a product, and nobody's buying the product, do you blame the customer,

00:06:34.480 or do you fix the product?

00:06:37.060 You fix the product.

00:06:38.180 Okay, so why is it with men?

00:06:40.060 We'll blame them for not wanting to get married instead of fixing the product, which is women. 1.00

00:06:43.900 But even if you fix yourself up, even if you could be the best woman there is, if a man's 0.91

00:06:49.600 not ready, he's not ready.

00:06:50.820 You cannot make a man do what he doesn't want to do.

00:06:53.280 And I agree with you, but that goes back to our decision-making.

00:06:56.660 We will stay with a guy for, we'll pick a guy and say, I will make you into a husband 1.00

00:07:01.740 when he's clearly not a husband, and then complain about the results.

00:07:05.180 Like, you said you dated a criminal.

00:07:08.140 Yes.

00:07:08.660 Like, the criminal's not a husband.

00:07:10.320 That's not husband material.

00:07:11.460 Okay, right?

00:07:13.680 Right?

00:07:14.560 He might have been wrongly imprisoned.

00:07:16.800 But was he a criminal because he was trying to make money to provide for the family?

00:07:20.260 If you're trying to make money to provide for the family, yes, you had to take an illegal

00:07:23.240 right, but if that's all the work that there was around for you-

00:07:25.700 Like, I can't make this shit up.

00:07:28.760 No, but this is real life.

00:07:31.160 This is real life.

00:07:32.120 We're not going off of statistics.

00:07:33.360 Everything I say is living in a real world.

00:07:34.980 Okay, but I'm saying, so don't whine later, because what women will do is they'll date 1.00

00:07:39.100 the drug dealers, the bad boys in our 20s, and then come in our 30s and say to the men,

00:07:44.340 oh, please, now I want the nice guy.

00:07:47.000 Well, but when you had the most options and you had the most beauty, the most youth, the

00:07:51.460 most purity, you picked the bad guys, and then you want the nice guys to take you later.

00:07:55.820 But even if you pick the right guys, right, when I was dating, right, I'm 37 now, so when

00:08:02.140 I was 25, there were men that I was dating, good job, and I would be like, yo, I want

00:08:07.140 to get married.

00:08:08.500 What was the response?

00:08:09.660 Were you a wife? 0.99

00:08:12.080 Was I a wife?

00:08:12.880 Of course.

00:08:13.560 Okay, were you raised to be a wife?

00:08:15.500 Yes, I was raised to be a wife, yes.

00:08:16.960 Okay, so what skills do you have that are like wife? 1.00

00:08:21.200 Because the whole show you've been talking about how you were raised to work, which is fine.

00:08:24.980 I'm not even, like, judging you about it, but it's possible that maybe they just didn't

00:08:29.740 see you as wife material. 0.89

00:08:31.960 I was raised, so my mother never worked, okay?

00:08:36.720 So my mother taught, instilled in me, okay, you have to cook for your husband.

00:08:41.040 Okay.

00:08:41.500 I did cook most of the family meals growing up.

00:08:43.360 You have to cook for your husband. 1.00

00:08:44.240 You have to make sure you serve him first.

00:08:45.560 Before you and your brother eat, he will eat.

00:08:48.340 You have to clean the house.

00:08:49.940 So these are things that I grew up doing, but at the end of the day, I still have to survive.

00:08:53.440 I have to take care of myself.

00:08:54.520 Right, and there's nothing wrong with that.

00:08:56.580 And I'm not, like, I don't know your situation, but I'm saying, like, if I'm trying to get

00:09:01.160 married and all the men are saying, no, I don't want to marry you, no, I don't want to

00:09:04.140 marry you, like, maybe it's just something you got to fix.

00:09:07.040 Like, I'm not even talking about you personally.

00:09:08.560 I'm just talking about women in general. 1.00

00:09:10.180 If the men don't want to marry us, it's like, maybe we need to improve, but women will blame 1.00

00:09:15.280 the buyer instead of fixing the product.

00:09:18.040 Bye.

00:09:18.360 Bye.

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00:09:24.160 Bye.

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JustPearlyThings - July 10, 2023

These Types Of Women Are Selfish Moms

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