JustPearlyThings - April 02, 2023


They got TRIGGERED When she said this...


Episode Stats

Length

11 minutes

Words per Minute

241.10883

Word Count

2,705

Sentence Count

290

Misogynist Sentences

15

Hate Speech Sentences

1


Summary

In this episode, we talk about the importance of a family unit and what it means to be a mother. We also talk about why it s important to stay at home with your kids and the benefits of going to work.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 The point isn't if it's right or wrong, I'm saying that's a modern mindset.
00:00:02.880 Like your answer is a modern mindset.
00:00:05.240 I have a mixed perception.
00:00:06.560 I'm not saying it's...
00:00:06.980 But long term, it's all based on your child or your children having better careers.
00:00:11.620 It's all based on...
00:00:12.000 No, it's not based on a better career.
00:00:13.620 For me, it's giving my child a better experience.
00:00:14.640 It's not based on love or building and things like that.
00:00:17.720 It's not based on love.
00:00:18.500 It's all based...
00:00:19.160 Sorry.
00:00:19.740 What do you mean?
00:00:20.720 Sorry.
00:00:21.080 It's based on my team.
00:00:22.400 So you're saying you're having a business is wanting to have a business as long as staying
00:00:26.740 at home.
00:00:26.920 The reason you want a career is for a better outcome.
00:00:29.640 Outcome financially.
00:00:31.900 And lifestyle, you want a better lifestyle.
00:00:33.180 If I'm staying at home at that point, I'm already there.
00:00:35.440 What I'm saying is...
00:00:36.360 What do you want the business for?
00:00:38.180 Like what is it for?
00:00:38.780 To keep me active.
00:00:39.280 That's what I'm saying.
00:00:40.280 Okay, okay, okay.
00:00:41.020 But this is...
00:00:41.840 Wait, wait, wait.
00:00:42.460 This is the point.
00:00:43.800 Me.
00:00:45.060 Your answer.
00:00:46.360 Me.
00:00:46.660 Yeah, to keep me active.
00:00:48.420 That's my point.
00:00:49.260 It's a modern mindset.
00:00:50.380 I'm not saying if it's right or it's wrong.
00:00:51.920 So what you're saying...
00:00:52.440 No, I get you.
00:00:53.240 Know thyself.
00:00:54.040 It's just...
00:00:54.880 That's a modern mindset.
00:00:56.080 But then at the same time, as long as I'm keeping myself active,
00:00:58.720 if I can't keep myself active, how am I going to be able to...
00:01:01.040 This is my opinion.
00:01:01.920 How would I be able to sustain that home and make it happy and cook and clean
00:01:04.740 if I'm not happy with myself?
00:01:06.260 What has being active got to do with going to work?
00:01:08.060 You can be active.
00:01:08.580 For her mental health.
00:01:09.360 That's my own mental health.
00:01:10.260 No, no, no.
00:01:11.140 But if you're saying...
00:01:13.180 That's your interpretation.
00:01:15.060 If you operate a business, it's all based on financial gain.
00:01:18.940 No, it's not.
00:01:19.740 That's not business.
00:01:20.540 Then it's not a business.
00:01:21.340 It's a hobby.
00:01:22.160 First of all...
00:01:22.440 The business is profit.
00:01:23.400 And if you're not making any profit, then business is...
00:01:25.500 Her business is creative.
00:01:26.940 Wait, guys, guys, guys, one at a time.
00:01:28.360 First of all, my business is creative.
00:01:30.180 I'm not only creative.
00:01:30.920 So why do you run a business?
00:01:32.080 Why do I run a business?
00:01:32.920 Because I have a passion.
00:01:33.900 She also inspires...
00:01:34.840 Would you do it for free?
00:01:35.700 But you let me finish.
00:01:37.100 The business I run is not just a business for financial gain
00:01:39.940 because I give a lot back.
00:01:41.000 It's not a business then?
00:01:41.820 You let me finish.
00:01:42.520 I put on events and I also do it to inspire single mothers
00:01:45.900 and people like me and people are not like me.
00:01:48.480 So it's not just to...
00:01:49.280 But the whole...
00:01:50.060 She's right.
00:01:50.800 It's not a business if you're not making money.
00:01:52.380 But the thing is, I am making money.
00:01:53.820 But at the same time...
00:01:54.440 So it's about money then?
00:01:55.200 It's not a gain.
00:01:55.740 It's to give back.
00:01:56.640 It's not just for me.
00:01:57.660 Oh, I'm not living off this business
00:01:59.920 because I work at the same time.
00:02:01.440 This is a business that I've put on.
00:02:03.100 It's not a business then if it's not about money.
00:02:04.780 Can you let me finish?
00:02:05.440 I didn't say it's business is profit.
00:02:06.620 It's a passion project.
00:02:08.380 It's a passion project.
00:02:09.380 It makes money and it's not just about money.
00:02:12.580 Okay, but the thing is, I get profit.
00:02:14.860 I'm not living off that profit.
00:02:16.320 I put it right back into business.
00:02:17.060 I think you've been in denial because I run a business.
00:02:18.780 I'm not being in denial.
00:02:19.480 I run a business and I'm very passionate about what I do.
00:02:22.520 There's been times I've done it for years.
00:02:23.640 Can I just answer your point?
00:02:24.600 You're saying to me that the business I would want to do is based on finances and based
00:02:28.240 on profit.
00:02:29.140 If that was the case, I wouldn't work.
00:02:30.660 I would just solely buy off my business.
00:02:31.580 No, business is profit, I'm saying.
00:02:33.140 So if you're doing business for any other needs other than profit, it's not a business.
00:02:36.940 It's a hobby.
00:02:37.540 Okay, can you go back to the point where you said it's based on something about not love.
00:02:40.880 It's based on, you said something else.
00:02:42.640 I was on about family unit.
00:02:44.380 Like, I don't know.
00:02:45.220 You've gone too back to...
00:02:46.600 I think what she's basically saying is you're more focused on maintaining your child rather
00:02:50.240 than raising your child.
00:02:51.240 No, because my child is...
00:02:52.620 It's not about that.
00:02:53.580 It's not about maintaining.
00:02:54.500 What I realized as a mother and from life experiences, you have to be...
00:02:58.800 You actually have to put your mind first, your mental health first.
00:03:02.160 You cannot raise a child in the best way possible if you're not mentally stable.
00:03:06.160 What society, in what society has society, what era has society flourished putting me
00:03:12.520 before the family?
00:03:13.140 It's not about putting me.
00:03:14.240 You have to put your mindset, your mindset, your child comes first.
00:03:17.580 Of course your child comes first.
00:03:18.420 A hundred percent.
00:03:19.220 I'm not saying my child comes before everything.
00:03:20.860 But you can't help everything.
00:03:21.600 It doesn't come before everything because you want a business before your child.
00:03:24.240 No, but I didn't say I want a business before my child.
00:03:25.260 You're in control of your happiness.
00:03:26.620 Yeah, you're in control of your happiness.
00:03:27.880 However, can I finish?
00:03:29.300 My child, without a shadow of a doubt, comes before everything.
00:03:32.740 Every single thing that I do.
00:03:33.740 I've even stopped working to make sure that my child was okay.
00:03:36.560 I've reduced my hours to make sure that my child is okay.
00:03:39.080 However, doing that, I realise if you're not right mentally, you can't...
00:03:42.900 I don't think you're in denial because I'm going to be real here.
00:03:45.120 You can't say I'm in denial.
00:03:46.300 I'm going to be real.
00:03:47.180 As I move out.
00:03:47.720 I believe that.
00:03:48.400 That's her outlet.
00:03:49.400 Basically, that's her outlet to make sure she's stably and mentally correct for her child.
00:03:54.800 But it's all for financial gain.
00:03:56.520 She's in denial, not financial gain.
00:03:57.820 Can I speak?
00:03:58.660 Can I speak?
00:03:59.180 You can't say I'm in denial because I would do it for free.
00:04:01.880 She would do it for free.
00:04:02.760 It's a passion project.
00:04:04.940 That's just her way, basically, her outlet in it, of her releasing herself from her child.
00:04:11.440 She'd prefer to go and do business, whereas some people might do a marathon.
00:04:17.360 You're still focusing your energy a bit away.
00:04:19.800 But her point is that if it's not about profit, it's not a business, then it's a hobby.
00:04:24.120 And, you know, maybe it is a hobby.
00:04:25.760 And maybe eventually, actually, my main goal eventually is turning to a charity.
00:04:29.240 It's my daughter's name.
00:04:30.960 I respect you.
00:04:31.840 It's passionate.
00:04:32.620 I understand that.
00:04:33.460 It's very passionate.
00:04:34.460 And I don't live off it.
00:04:35.680 That was not my aim.
00:04:36.680 But the point is you're saying you would rather spend 30% of the week on you than on the family.
00:04:41.940 And it's just, it's a modern answer.
00:04:43.520 And so when you're saying it's not a modern answer, it's just not true.
00:04:47.600 It is a modern answer.
00:04:48.440 You're saying that, like, she's not with her in the morning.
00:04:50.500 She's not with her at night.
00:04:51.340 She's not with her to drop her to school.
00:04:52.060 But that's maintaining a child.
00:04:53.400 Raising a child and maintaining a child is two different things.
00:04:55.520 No, but the thing is, you can't say that because I raised my child.
00:04:58.900 No, but no one's saying you're wrong in saying that, you know.
00:05:01.480 I don't believe that.
00:05:02.600 If you're sending your kid to school, and loads of people will disagree here,
00:05:05.700 you're not really raising your child because for eight hours a day,
00:05:08.480 and then you get these independent women that get up in the morning
00:05:10.920 and do breakfast club and after club.
00:05:13.400 That's like 10 hours a day.
00:05:14.980 My daughter doesn't do breakfast or after club.
00:05:16.160 I'm just saying, people do this, like, they'll send the kids for 10 hours a day, yeah.
00:05:20.620 So do you think you're not?
00:05:21.460 Can I speak?
00:05:21.740 Can I speak?
00:05:22.840 She's right.
00:05:23.720 For 10 hours a day, yeah, your kid's not.
00:05:25.520 She's at school, come home after care, 6 o'clock, have a wash, watch TV, go to bed.
00:05:30.760 You're not even seeing your child.
00:05:31.940 No, but I see my child because she has activities every single day.
00:05:33.960 You're telling me she goes to school, so you're not raising your child?
00:05:36.440 Your child's being programmed to the social norm.
00:05:38.820 I don't agree with that.
00:05:39.580 You have to raise your child because they're norming.
00:05:41.140 You're not raising your child?
00:05:42.260 I am raising my child.
00:05:43.040 No, you're not raising your child.
00:05:44.060 No, she's right.
00:05:45.180 And I mean, I feel like that makes socially awkward people.
00:05:47.860 My child's not socially awkward.
00:05:50.620 My child is so confident.
00:05:52.240 She teaches a class of 30 children and 30 people.
00:05:55.700 Where does she teach that?
00:05:56.620 My classes, I run classes, and she teaches people.
00:05:59.900 She's more confident than the average girl.
00:06:01.500 So you believe when you send your child to school that you're not raising them at all?
00:06:04.560 You're giving another adult time.
00:06:05.580 So what time is she?
00:06:06.200 Wait, you're giving another adult time, more time to spend with your child than you will.
00:06:10.220 And I'll say I went to school, but there were times when I certainly spent more time with
00:06:16.000 coaches or teachers than my parents because, again, I'm spending eight hours a day in school.
00:06:22.020 So when you have one homeroom teacher and they teach most of your classes in third grade,
00:06:27.240 you're spending eight hours a day communicating with that homeroom teacher.
00:06:30.460 A parent just can't keep up.
00:06:31.800 And we now have outcomes where kids are getting brainwashed in schools.
00:06:35.820 And now they don't even know.
00:06:37.260 But parenting isn't just smothering your child 24-7.
00:06:41.740 They are meant to be practicing independence.
00:06:44.520 They're meant to be meeting people.
00:06:46.060 They're meant to be interacting.
00:06:47.300 They're meant to be in social situations.
00:06:48.580 But then the mother would teach that.
00:06:49.260 They have to grow up at some point.
00:06:50.840 Just because you homeschool your child doesn't mean they miss out on any of those aspects.
00:06:54.200 You, as a mother, have a duty to ensure those are in place.
00:06:57.520 It's not just in school that they get them.
00:06:59.320 Yeah, but I'm just going off the point that Pearl made.
00:07:01.320 Like, you know, that just because, you know, I'm not spending 24-7 with them every second
00:07:07.760 and I'm sending them to school.
00:07:09.400 Exactly.
00:07:10.020 That's, you know.
00:07:10.940 Sometimes it's best for the child as well.
00:07:13.240 Do you know what I mean?
00:07:13.700 Sometimes, who knows, like, the child might be fed up of you.
00:07:16.840 The child wants a bit of space as well.
00:07:17.660 I'm not saying homeschooling is based upon you living with your child 24-7.
00:07:21.760 Yeah, but you are saying that if someone sends their child to school.
00:07:24.820 You said that her working twice a day.
00:07:27.080 They're not raising their children.
00:07:28.340 I think she's just saying what she wants to do personally.
00:07:30.340 She is raising her child.
00:07:32.080 No, no, no.
00:07:33.000 But why are you the judge?
00:07:34.740 What makes you a judge?
00:07:35.200 This is my opinion.
00:07:36.260 That's my opinion.
00:07:37.140 Like, she's got hers.
00:07:37.880 You've got yours.
00:07:38.520 I'm just saying for eight hours a day, your child is into the care of somebody else.
00:07:42.180 And for most people, they're going to breakfast club and aftercare.
00:07:46.220 So that's 10 hours a day.
00:07:47.700 It's only 24.
00:07:48.540 I get what you're saying there.
00:07:49.360 I get what you're saying.
00:07:50.000 You get four hours in a week there with your child.
00:07:52.160 That is absurd.
00:07:53.620 That's insane.
00:07:54.480 And they're going to have a wash.
00:07:55.340 I understand, but your child also needs to learn other fundamental skills.
00:08:01.140 They don't need to do it.
00:08:01.780 It doesn't take 10 hours a day.
00:08:03.220 It doesn't take 10 hours a day.
00:08:04.320 Does it ask you a question?
00:08:05.500 I don't know about 10 hours.
00:08:07.760 Guys, guys, guys, guys.
00:08:08.560 Wait, wait, wait.
00:08:09.720 Okay.
00:08:10.940 You can go.
00:08:11.880 Go ahead.
00:08:12.540 So you see you're homeschooling your child.
00:08:15.340 Would you say now you're fully raising your child because you're homeschooling your child?
00:08:18.460 Is that what you see?
00:08:19.700 Is that your point?
00:08:20.360 Because I'm sending my child to school and I'm not raising her.
00:08:23.040 That's what you said.
00:08:23.940 So what is it from homeschooling perspective?
00:08:26.220 How would you view it?
00:08:27.520 I believe I've got more of an input of what I can put into my child and more of a say.
00:08:33.960 Whereas for 10 hours, 8 hours a day at school, I don't have a say.
00:08:37.000 Can I ask you another question?
00:08:38.000 Is that one of the main reasons you chose to homeschool your child?
00:08:41.060 I chose to homeschool because I went to school and then I was always like two, three years ahead.
00:08:46.260 So in year one, I was in year three.
00:08:47.900 In year three, I was in year five.
00:08:49.900 And like I'd finish my work in 20 minutes.
00:08:51.860 So why do I need eight hours a day if I can complete my work in 20 minutes?
00:08:56.160 I'm not saying my child's me because she isn't, but I'm intelligent enough to educate my own child.
00:09:00.640 I have a question.
00:09:01.840 So who has more influence over your kid?
00:09:03.680 Someone spending eight to 10 hours a day with your kid or someone spending four?
00:09:08.700 The teacher?
00:09:09.900 Be honest.
00:09:10.640 And why do you think we have these kids that are coming home literally thinking they're women?
00:09:15.100 Like little boys literally coming home thinking they're women.
00:09:18.260 That's bonkers.
00:09:19.280 And women, young women literally coming home and thinking they're men.
00:09:22.660 Yeah.
00:09:22.840 And then when they get older, they're even saying, I want to go back to this.
00:09:25.620 Anjanina Jones' child.
00:09:27.560 We went to private school, like Catholic school.
00:09:29.980 And even us, they showed my sister CNN kids.
00:09:33.720 Why are they showing a liberal news network to my fifth grade child?
00:09:38.660 And that's our point.
00:09:39.280 You can avoid a lot of those problems by homeschooling.
00:09:41.560 I mean, the-
00:09:42.360 For all.
00:09:43.000 The-
00:09:43.460 Homeschool is on the rise.
00:09:44.740 Like, there's a reason for that.
00:09:46.100 But you're going to be in the world-
00:09:46.960 But it's on the internet anyway.
00:09:48.180 Yeah, it's on the internet.
00:09:48.740 But then-
00:09:49.240 You're going to be in the world regardless.
00:09:50.940 Yeah, but you need to make them aware of certain things that you believe in your family culture
00:09:55.620 or tradition or whatever, otherwise they're going to be led astray.
00:09:58.540 Yeah, but then that is down to you as a parent to make sure that you raise your child with those values.
00:10:04.460 How can you do that when they're at school?
00:10:06.320 That doesn't happen.
00:10:07.100 You've only got four hours with them.
00:10:08.360 How can you do that?
00:10:08.880 My parents did it with me and I think I turned out all right.
00:10:11.860 I'm not going to-
00:10:12.400 Yeah, I feel like the four hours, that's only, okay, there's term time.
00:10:15.740 You've turned out to be a modern woman, so that if you're happy with that, which is-
00:10:19.960 I'm modern.
00:10:20.580 I respect it.
00:10:21.140 I'm modern, but I have my traditional values.
00:10:23.400 And you're also traditional, but so are modern women.
00:10:24.340 They think they're still traditional, but if you're not all of it, you're not any of it,
00:10:28.400 you either are or you aren't.
00:10:29.500 She's right.
00:10:30.540 But why?
00:10:31.200 She's right.
00:10:31.820 Why?
00:10:31.960 You can't be in between.
00:10:33.280 You can't have the best of both worlds.
00:10:35.020 But why?
00:10:35.780 What?
00:10:36.180 How can-
00:10:36.740 Because it doesn't function right.
00:10:38.140 It doesn't work.
00:10:38.860 Okay.
00:10:39.140 Because then you're in the house now with your man, trying to make, like, you're equal
00:10:43.680 with arguments and debates.
00:10:45.040 No, no, I don't think we're equal.
00:10:45.980 You said that earlier.
00:10:46.720 We have different roles.
00:10:48.340 If I can't have a say at certain things, you're not going to be happy.
00:10:50.800 But this is the problem.
00:10:51.800 You either are or you aren't.
00:10:53.100 So go and chase your career or be a stay-at-home mom or whatever.
00:10:56.820 As many of you know, I was just banned on TikTok and we are demonetized on a daily basis
00:11:03.040 on this platform.
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