This DELUSIONAL Woman Said This
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
213.6099
Summary
In this episode, we talk about the importance of letting a man lead in a relationship and how important it is to let him lead on a date and on a first date. We also talk about when a woman should let her partner lead and when a man should start leading.
Transcript
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let me ask you a question do you feel that if a woman meets a man she should let him lead
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like straight off the gate like when do you think a man should start leading in a relationship
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do you think instantly we go on our first date for a couple calls you're measuring it straight
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away right like is he making the plan for the date or is he a bit indecisive and sort of on
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the fence and he's asking you you're losing attraction for him right there and then
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so you're measuring from that right from the get-go yeah okay when you say let him lead it
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sounds like like you have to allow him to i mean like you have to you have to like give it to him
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you do have to allow you you are in control of yourself right so if i let a man lead me that
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means that i'm taking my authority and saying hey whatever you say i'm going with what you say
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so it is you that's indicating on you following like like it's so interesting language like the
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way we use language because it's like elite like like i think of trump like that's someone who's
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like a leader like melania doesn't let him lead he just leads and she can either follow or not
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yeah but but that's the he but she loves to be i don't want to i don't want to call her a puppet but
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that's what he married he married someone who was easy just to be like hey i need you to be this beauty
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queen sit here well look at that's what the top men pick but we all have it yeah i'm sorry if you let
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me put my five pence in we all have roles right and if there is a let's say let's say family is
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like a company right so if there is a boss do you obey your boss yes you do obey your boss so if the
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husband is a boss then you kind of have to obey him anyway i have no problem with obeying my husband
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and uh but i trust him wholeheartedly so if he does not you know if he betrays my trust then there
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is other ways and repercussions and perhaps we are not suitable or we are discussing the situation
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stuff like that but there has to be a head and i have i have to agree with you there has to be a head
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yeah to every company so if you just say yes you know you do you have to obey in some situations but
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again we are going back to the trust and the level being built and built and built and working as a
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teamwork together we're all different i do my bit you do your bit and if i need to i obey you i'm not
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ashamed i'm proud of it actually because it builds our families bond stronger can i ask you a question
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pearl now when you meet a man right this two-part question when you meet a man do you let him lead
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right away do i let him lead i don't think i can let a man lead does he lead right away do you like
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follow his decisions like right away you meet him you're like you know what you got this yes yes okay
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so if he came to you let's say first date was november now two months later in january he's like hey
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i saw this building i think i kind of want to buy it i want you to go in half of me would you do it
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he's leading are we married you're letting him lead he's telling you for our future this building's
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going to be it yeah i would say let's let's get married and then i'll i'll go on we can go right
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ahead you know so you would just no you're letting him leave you know i don't know if that's the best
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example but that's what i'm saying building but that's what it sounds like when you say just let
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like you have to get to know the man first before you say okay i trust your judgment to know that you
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are not going to lead me to a path of destruction so you have to get to know that man you have to
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know that he can lead himself i'm not saying like submit to any old guy you meet like but i'm saying if
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you're going on a date with him i'm saying go in in good faith yes i'll go on dates with good
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face actually what you said earlier i get turned off if i if a man's supposed to take me on a date
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and he comes and picks me up and he has no plan of where we're going like lead the way my favorite
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my favorite thing to tell a guy is lead the way lead especially on a date lead the way this is
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you i'm following behind you i want to see yeah i want to see because i'm i'm ready to let a man lead
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i'm tired of working i'm go ahead you want to have three babies go ahead i'm ready but when you meet
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these men and you're like the new age men especially in after 35 years it's like hey so what do you want
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to do what do you want to do to split the bill yeah the 50 50 concept so if i work at the nursery all the
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time but i think how would i do i get the money to pay 50 50 if i work all these jobs well is that
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common i've never really had guys want to go 50 50 is that common for you guys in new york
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that's actually that's like a me thing like i don't know when i grew up i had a lot of like
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you know male friends it was a mixed group but there were a lot of boys and we were equal this was you
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know the sort of late 90s early 2000s and we were equal and so it has never occurred to me that if
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i go on a date i would do anything other than go 50 50. yeah but that's really english things really
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like british thing no i just said like if i went on a date like i know but you're talking about in
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your childhood that sounded like yes yeah yeah yeah um and so i i i i think i just i don't think
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that that is appropriate like i think it's appropriate if you both decide that kids are
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you know what you want in your life and you know you want to give kids the best possible nutrition so
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mom's going to stay at home and breastfeed them and unless she's like fortunate enough to be able to
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earn from home in minimal time you know he is gonna have to be the one providing but like on a first
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date like i i don't know i i find that quite emasculating it's like the idea that someone would
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have to pay for the privilege of spending time with me it's like no i want to start out like as i've just
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found that most guys like want to yeah that's exactly yeah i've never had like a guy didn't want
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i can't even yeah no i have i have experienced like yeah discomfort from guys like honestly because
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i'm not comfortable with them paying if you go on like a lot i do a lot of online dating and there
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are men who are like hey if we go on a date 50 50 we can go get a coffee but if we go on an actual date
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i want to make sure i'm not wasting my time and you're not there for a free meal so go 50 50 with me
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just to prove that you're there for the right reason then i wouldn't go for sure if he thinks
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i'm there for a free meal like dude really i cook amazing just come over but this is real life like
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situations and scenarios that women are going through like even there was one guy i met nice
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guy and i was like okay you know i do want to go on a date with you and he said just to let you know
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first date we're 50 50. i said okay block like i'm gonna block you because what are you talking about
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and then he's seen me in person was like hey you don't remember me i don't mr 50 50 i don't please
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don't talk to me don't try to get a dance with me don't talk to me you're not the type of man you
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you want me to let you leave but i have to pay you 50 50 on the first date come on i had a story where um
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friend of mine she went on a date and uh had to prompt the guy to pay he's like oh okay and uh she
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weren't gonna go home with him so the next day he messaged her for the money back this is happening
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so he wanted free sex in exchange for dinner i'll tell you i'll tell you those guys point of view
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though it's because like you're not a traditional woman right like because over over traditional
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women really get married before 25 because they spend their most fertile years focused on family the
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most traditional women want families first right so it's not an insult it's not a bad thing it's just
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the most traditional it's not a bad thing it's me yeah yeah the most the most traditional women get
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married they stay married 25 and under i would say roughly um so it's like they're like why am i paying
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like why am i doing the traditional thing when i don't get the traditional outcome
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but that's because it's like it's like we wanted to be equal right we wanted to go to work we wanted
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to spend our 20s in the workforce and then we do that and then we're like all right now treat me
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traditionally and so a lot of guys are just confused they're like i thought you guys were