00:05:14.780So, like, the upper end, I literally just said 40.
00:05:18.420Like, romantically, if you look good, there's no reason why it can't even be beyond 40.
00:05:24.340The only reason why I cap it at 40, because I presume you're probably in a different stage
00:05:28.980of life that I'm in, and there might be a lifestyle mismatch.
00:05:33.180That's the only reason, but even then, I could discover that's not the case, and then I'd be willing to, as long as I, you look good to me, I'm still attracted to you, we're all good.
00:05:42.740I, sorry to interrupt, but I think ages are irrelevant.
00:05:46.500I mean, there's, there's a limit to what I would go down to.
00:05:51.500But I think you could be, this is from a woman's point of view, to men, you could be missing out from a really great woman, just because you put these restrictions on ages, and it's not all about, you know, it's popping out babies.
00:06:06.240It might be, you might find the woman, the love of your life at any, they could be any age.
00:06:11.000You don't have to be popping babies out, but you could miss out for, for amazing long, you know, lifelong partner with all your restrictions.
00:06:19.820That's just my personal point of view.
00:06:21.540But you kind of contradicted yourself, because you said age is irrelevant, but then you said you wouldn't go under 25.
00:06:28.280Like, like what, what's wrong with a 24-year-old that's got his stuff together?
00:06:31.600Okay, yeah, I said 25, but yeah, if it's a 24-year-old, but I'm not going to go, I'm not going to go really low, because that's not relevant for me, and I know I'm not saying how old I am, but yes.
00:06:41.000I understand, I apologize for, if you felt, I contradicted myself, but yeah, there is a limit, but an upper limit, you could be missing out on a great man or a great woman.
00:07:03.380It could be 110, treats me well, just wants to take me out to dinner and have some company, buy me nice things, but you still have to be respectful.
00:07:11.700Yeah, I agree with you to a certain extent, given I think ultimately it comes down to your intention.
00:07:18.820So if your intention is to actually have a family, I think there's a biological plot that we can't necessarily overlook, and you may say that there's also, yeah, there are options, adoption and so forth, but not every man may necessarily want to take that route.
00:07:31.800So my response was for an effect of my version of a commitment where I am in my life.
00:07:37.000I need to be with a woman that I can have a family with, and with my age currently speaking, the higher up I go, I guess, if I want more than one child or so forth, that kind of has to be accelerated.
00:07:55.700And as a man, you know, you've got to kind of plan these things up, but the planning also takes time.
00:08:02.340So, you know, there's a point when, I'm not sure it's different for different women, but from what I've learned in school, there's a point when women can't provide families.
00:08:11.300No, no, I understand that. And I have a very calm point of view when it comes to children. I'm not going to go there now.
00:08:21.300I am a support person to my best friend, who's a foster carer, and I've seen the value of fostering and adoption.
00:08:27.940There are thousands of children in this country who would benefit from having an amazing, loving home.
00:08:34.840And when you look at things differently, this is just my personal point of view, and it's no attack on anyone here.
00:08:39.200But when you look at the children that don't actually have a home, and you've got everyone popping out of these babies, I get it.
00:08:46.120People say, oh, I want blood. It has to be my blood, my child.
00:08:50.260But if you actually look into it, whether it's adoption or fostering, okay, fostering's different for a short time, but adoption, it doesn't matter whether it's blood or not.
00:09:00.020The problem is, there's a lot of problems that come with adoption.
00:09:03.340Like, there's a lot of issues. Like, if you don't get the kid before the age of three, like, it's fully developed.
00:09:07.980And any issues that it had before the age of three, a lot of times you can't stop.
00:09:12.800And I'm not, like, against adoption, but I just think sometimes it can, a lot of people aren't aware of how hard it is when they go into it.
00:09:21.600And this is as someone, like, I have three adopted siblings.
00:09:42.400It's just kind of like, if a guy could avoid that headache of, like, you'd have to find the kid, hopefully it's, like, coming out of a not-too-bad situation, and, like, pay.
00:09:53.620It's really expensive, too, in the U.S.
00:09:55.160I don't know how it is here, but you have to pay $10,000-plus per kid.
00:09:58.840It's like, why would he go through that headache?
00:13:52.660But I feel like, with her, she had dealt with it, wrestled with it, and had coping mechanisms to, like, pull her through it.
00:14:01.840And there was so much, I learned from her in that regard of, like, okay, this is what it looks like when you kind of take care of your own shit.
00:14:40.340And she, I think, even just the idea of what a woman can contribute to your life outside of her being beautiful and looking good, like, just being stimulated mentally, like, by her and her life experiences, like you said.
00:14:56.040Like, it kind of shaped what I look for dating going forward.
00:15:04.820So, basically, as a woman grows older, maybe past the age of, like, 26, 27, they start to have a better mentality, less insecurity, less headaches, a bit more maybe grounded and a bit more self-sufficient when it comes to emotional stability.
00:15:20.560And yet, we're trying to say that it's easier, maybe, perhaps, or better for men to go for 19-year-olds.
00:15:25.980With women over 30, generally, you're just way more calm.
00:15:44.060I'm not saying everyone in their 20s is immature or not ready or whatever, but I think, generally speaking, in your 20s, you're trying to figure it out.
00:15:57.160I think when you reach that age, you just had so much experience.
00:15:59.760And I'm just saying, like, as for me, I don't want to experience your experience.
00:16:03.980So, I wouldn't, me personally, I wouldn't take anyone over that age seriously.
00:16:07.120Because you come with a lot of baggage and me personally, if I'm going to take you seriously, if you're like 20 years plus more than me, you have a lot of experience that you're going to compare me to.
00:16:19.620So, if I lack in one field, you're going to be like, in the back of your mind, you'll be like, oh, but when I was dating so and so, he used to buy me all these gifts.
00:16:33.120So, when I was your age, I used to feel guilty.
00:16:34.980Like, if I was dragging it on for too long, because I'd feel like, you know what, I don't, I can't see this long term because of the age gap.
00:16:41.900And then I feel guilty, like, dragging it on because I feel like I'm wasting your time.
00:16:45.300Do you guys feel like older women, um, okay, I had a guy tell me once that if he dated a girl under the age of 25, he didn't have to worry as much about that because she wasn't, like, dying for commitment.
00:16:57.440But if she was over the age of 25, like, they want to settle down, like, they want to lock you down quicker.
00:17:04.980I'm asking the guys because they date women, so.
00:17:14.560I mean, to be fair, I think, I think when it comes to older women, right, and I just think from my experience, like, when I, I, like, now I date long term, seriously.
00:17:23.240But obviously, you know, back in the day, your boy had a little sprinkle around the field.
00:17:27.740But, um, one thing I, oh, I was, I was, I was, I was sprouting very early from 16 onwards.
00:17:33.260But one thing I realized about, um, these, uh, older women is that it, it's kind of, they're more on the, I, I don't see it on the side where they take it serious.
00:17:42.380Because once they see a younger guy, I don't, they don't usually see me as a serious candidate as for a long term relationship.
00:17:53.760So, like, I know when I used to get in those, um, situations, the fact that since I was so young, and I guess the way how I would compliment them, make them feel, make their body feel like there's a temple.
00:18:05.020They, they, they, they live off of that stimulation because I'm, I'm overly praising them in such a sense.
00:18:11.040So the fact that I made them feel younger, they know that I'm not going to get this as a long term relationship.
00:18:15.720And I made that clear from the start, but they just really enjoyed the fun they was getting, let me put it like that.
00:18:20.840And I think the, the common denominator of every story is that you were young and in your twenties, you're in your early twenties.
00:18:26.440So I think that shows a level of manipulation was maybe that like, they know that you're young and naive and you'll like latch on cause it's fun.
00:18:33.800You know, you know, you think it's a manipulation, but like they know you're young and you're like, like you're impressionable.
00:18:43.720Yeah, you'll enjoy the validation of being with them almost like, cause like no one said, oh, when I was in my, like late, like when I was in my, like late twenties or early thirties, I was with someone that was like 50 because, because you know yourself better and you know that that's not something you could maybe commit to.
00:18:57.320And so who, who has manipulated him or her?
00:19:00.520Not like, not manipulated, but like you, as your younger self, you don't know yourself as well.
00:19:05.280Maybe so like, you're kind of like, oh, like this older person likes me.
00:21:03.560And so I'm here and I'm like, so in this 18 year old, who is like a few years off from being a child, you're like, in you, I see a partner and someone I want to build and someone I want to model my potential daughters after all of that really.
00:21:16.640And I'm like, bro, like off an 18 year old, you got that?
00:21:19.760It kind of depends though, if, if, if, if she's like someone that's been like working out there enough, like living by herself, independent, then you kind of, cause a lot of women mature a lot quicker as well.
00:21:47.760It's because sometimes you're like, oh, she's 18 and she's in uni and she's only lived with her parents and she's coming out and you're visiting her dorm in uni and you're a big man.
00:21:59.760Maybe she's 18 and she wants a family.
00:22:01.760Maybe she's 18 and she wants to be a mother.
00:23:04.760And I think that is not about manipulation.
00:23:06.760It's just about the point to the fact that there'll be a certain moment in both of their lives where you're just going to realize we're not on the same level.
00:28:45.760But to answer my girl's question, that would be the reason why a guy that's 32 is gonna go for an 18-year-old so he can mould her into the girl that he wants.
00:28:54.760Don't you think that people should, like, as they're, like, so young, they're 18, like, don't you think they should find their own way in life?
00:29:01.760Like, yeah, like, dating a 32-year-old might be helpful for them and, like, working out these life, like, problems and stuff.
00:29:06.760And, like, they can guide them in their way.
00:29:08.760But, like, I think trying to change someone that's so young, it's just, like, backwards.
00:29:11.760Like, they need to find their own way in life.