JustPearlyThings - August 04, 2023


This Sex Worker CONFESSED This On AIR

Hosted by
Hannah Pearl Davis
Mentioned
Trauma Ruins
The Cause of Disunity Between Men and Women Pearl NUKES Their Woke Disney Fairytale

Episode Stats


Length

15 minutes

Words per minute

227.69

Word count

3,485

Sentence count

125

Harmful content

Misogyny

16

sentences flagged

Toxicity

1

sentences flagged

Hate speech

17

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, we talk about what we look for in a man, what we like and what we don't like in a partner and how to find the right one for you. We also talk about the importance of hygiene and how important it is to be nice to your mother.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.000 Well, what do you think? I think if I see
00:00:03.880 My man treat his mom with respect
00:00:06.900 You know treat treat his the women in his family how they should be treated because I've seen a lot of guys and
00:00:13.020 They they're horrible to their parents. Who was your last boyfriend?
00:00:17.700 My only boyfriend. Okay, was he nice to his mom?
00:00:21.420 Yeah, very nice. Who ended the relationship?
00:00:25.620 Me
00:00:27.620 So let's say listen to what women do and not say 1.00
00:00:32.000 But why he was nice to his mom? Yeah, he was nice to his mom, but he also liked to
00:00:38.140 Do a lot of really bad things. So that didn't do it for me
00:00:41.700 But that is definitely a big thing though still the parents your mom okay looking at hygiene
00:00:47.980 So you want to be nice to your mother and shower all right hygiene
00:00:53.180 For me, I like a man with money
00:00:55.780 I'm gonna say it because I need to feel stable as well, you know, and women like to be looked off 1.00
00:01:00.900 I appreciate the honesty
00:01:02.900 You're not capping we don't cap on the show
00:01:06.020 And I feel like you there's a lot of times where how much?
00:01:10.740 Give me a number a lot wet so I've been single for quite a while now and I feel like I'm looking after myself all the time
00:01:16.520 It gets to a point you get fed up with that and you actually just want a nice masculine man to take care of you and put you in
00:01:23.400 His arms I like that and everyone's different, but that's what I like
00:01:26.520 How much as long as I've got a nice house? I've got a nice car. What is it was a nice house go for in London?
00:01:36.320 Oh, I wouldn't live in England anyway, I'd live abroad definitely 1.00
00:01:40.780 You're looking for a man in another country 1.00
00:01:42.520 No, that would want to move so hopefully he's got his businesses all set old and we can go
00:01:48.740 What makes you think that guy will choose you?
00:01:50.740 You know what? I might never get a rich man in my life, but that's what I like so hopefully it get there
00:01:57.500 Well, okay, you might never get taking steps to get there at the moment. I'm healing on myself
00:02:03.280 I've got a lot of issues. I need to sort out before I can never get a partner. Okay, and that's how are you healing them therapy?
00:02:09.160 Oh, yeah, I think therapy makes you crazier. No, you know what? I think all the women I know that go to therapy get worse 1.00
00:02:15.980 Yeah, and I can actually agree with that
00:02:18.160 But the only reason I'm getting this therapy because it's free at the moment and I do actually need some sort of help
00:02:23.500 Is it a male or a female? It's a female. I'm gonna just you should go to a male therapist. Really? Yeah 1.00
00:02:29.800 Women shouldn't be therapists. It's just my opinion. I'm in I'm in the psychology program at the school 1.00
00:02:34.600 I promise you these women that are giving you they're horrible. Yeah horrible 1.00
00:02:38.400 There and say men look to solve problems 1.00
00:02:40.520 Yeah, guys gonna tell you if I have this problem. So you solve it women are just gonna say oh, it's okay 1.00
00:02:46.520 Tell me about your trauma
00:02:48.520 I also have had men therapists that have made me feel really uncomfortable and flat with me
00:02:54.400 And that didn't solve any of my problems. Well, I felt uncomfortable at my therapy session. So to me
00:02:59.280 I'll feel more comfortable with a woman. I have a more natural. How do you flirt? 0.85
00:03:02.780 Just making comments with your social media and things like that, you know making me feel uncomfortable because everyone he knew that I'm a SA
00:03:11.220 No, it's a SW
00:03:13.220 You don't want to be an SA 1.00
00:03:14.900 I'm allowed to say that right?
00:03:17.020 Yeah
00:03:17.520 Do you think that helps or hurts with your mental health?
00:03:20.280 It hurts it so so much. Okay, I'll be so real
00:03:23.340 Well, can you why do you keep doing it then?
00:03:26.000 Because at that moment, I mean like a bit of a loophole
00:03:29.280 Where it's a bit hard to come out of it where I'm just used to money being thrown at me
00:03:33.500 I'm scared to go back into a normal job routine
00:03:37.580 How how much in savings do you have savings? Um, do I really have to answer that you do you have more than like, okay
00:03:45.240 What do you what do you roughly make a year?
00:03:47.240 And yeah, I'd say maybe not on I left but all together. Maybe I'd say about 50 K 1.00
00:03:53.300 50 K. Yeah, that's the sex work. Yeah, you said you think you're worth 50 K a year?
00:03:59.620 No, but I don't work a lot though with it. I do, you know
00:04:03.140 I don't overdo it because when I was a bit younger I overworked and that's when I was in a really bad place
00:04:09.700 I overdid it. So I've taken a bit of a step back. I don't even do my OnlyFans anymore
00:04:15.140 I'm more do like dominatrix and come in and that just keeps me steady for now
00:04:21.080 Yeah, well, I'm just thinking if you want to get out
00:04:22.880 Oh, no, of course, of course
00:04:24.440 Right, so like it might help to get some savings so then you can
00:04:27.940 Yeah, no, I've got savings. I've got savings. Don't get me wrong. I've got savings
00:04:31.620 But also I've gotten a lot of debt as well
00:04:33.380 And I also had to go for a court case on spending money on solicitors
00:04:36.900 You know things happen in life life's one big journey and I feel like everyone's journey is different
00:04:41.280 Some people have a really good life and some people don't have a good life. So what made you get into that?
00:04:46.800 Well, the sex work sort of thing
00:04:49.380 I used to work in a care home and I was actually very like depressed very low and I wasn't making a lot of money
00:04:55.440 And I had my ex-boyfriend at the time that used to
00:04:57.940 He used to really make me feel low, you know, and even like we'd go out for meals and he'd say
00:05:02.580 Have you got the 10 pound from the meal?
00:05:04.180 He used to always make me split and I used to think to myself like like I care for you
00:05:08.340 I love you. I treat you try and treat you well
00:05:11.060 And he never gave me that back and then I worked in the care home and I was sitting there one day
00:05:15.780 And I thought I can't do this anymore. Like my man don't even want to help like help
00:05:20.660 um
00:05:21.860 And then I was sitting there and
00:05:23.860 Speaking to one of the old guys that used to look after in the care home
00:05:26.980 And I told him my whole plan about starting the OnlyFans, you know
00:05:30.100 And he sat there and he said to me do it
00:05:32.100 Why are you not doing it? You're gonna be old like me one day sitting in a chair
00:05:35.060 You're gonna like die basically one day just do it 0.68
00:05:38.260 And I thought
00:05:39.060 He probably just wanted to subscribe
00:05:39.940 Yeah, you know, but he didn't make it till that time because he passed away a few months after but I started it and
00:05:47.060 How old were you?
00:05:48.180 I was 19. So you're 19 you're working in a care home. Sorry, it gets hot. It gets very hot
00:05:55.780 How many years did you run your OnlyFans?
00:05:59.940 Probably about a year and a half then I stopped
00:06:03.860 Yeah, so I was working in the care home and then I started it and I knew that if I started the OF
00:06:08.820 My ex would leave me alone because he hated things like that and I knew that he'd really leave me alone because we were so toxic together
00:06:14.740 And then I was I was in work. I checked my phone. I think I made maybe like 2k in that day
00:06:20.820 And to me, that's a lot. I haven't come from a big family. I haven't come from
00:06:24.420 A stable family at all. I think 2k in a day is a lot
00:06:27.220 And for me it was because I was getting 400 pound a week from the care home and I was working 12 hour shifts and five days a week
00:06:32.900 So to me that was amazing
00:06:34.660 How old did you say you are now?
00:06:36.260 I'm 22 now
00:06:37.300 Okay, so you've been doing it for like three years. Yeah, and then I said to my manager
00:06:41.620 I need to leave work
00:06:42.900 Like I don't really want to be here and I told him my situation with the OnlyFans. She said to me just go
00:06:47.700 So I went and I just never looked back. So why did you pick that route instead of like, I don't know marrying rich?
00:06:54.020 You know what it was. You're a pretty girl. You were 19. Thank you. You were with the guy for three years
00:06:58.740 So you couldn't have been
00:07:00.740 I mean, you probably weren't street in that much if you're with a guy for three years, were you?
00:07:04.900 Maybe you were okay. Yeah, I was a mess. I was a mess. I had no control over my emotions
00:07:10.980 I felt like I didn't even know who I was right
00:07:12.980 But when you're in a young relationship, you don't even know who you are as a person at that point
00:07:17.620 You grow to learn who you are
00:07:19.620 Why ruin your own life you could have got married ruin someone else's too
00:07:22.420 I don't want to get married. I'm against marriage. I don't ever want to get married. Thank you
00:07:26.340 I don't
00:07:28.340 I don't like marriage
00:07:30.340 Not everyone wants to get married and not everyone wants children
00:07:32.340 I know I just I just think it's like a shame because there's way to utilize female beauty in a different way and still get the outcomes that 0.99
00:07:38.500 Yeah, you know what I mean?
00:07:39.620 Like now now you're in a position where it's gonna be tough to ever be with a guy long term
00:07:43.620 Yeah, but maybe I don't want to be with a guy long term
00:07:46.340 Maybe I want to live with three cats at my home with all my cactuses. What do you want your life to look like? It's 65?
00:07:51.940 I'll probably be dead by then. So I don't know. I don't think that far ahead because life
00:07:58.980 Yeah, it's just you really sure I don't plan that hard head. I live in the moment
00:08:03.220 Yeah, it probably will but if it does it does I don't really care. Yeah, you do. No, I don't
00:08:08.660 I think you feel a bit under
00:08:10.020 No
00:08:11.220 I don't
00:08:13.220 Yeah
00:08:15.380 Maybe it will hit me, but it's gonna hit me up and I'm here. I'm healthy
00:08:20.180 You know, I'm living got good family members
00:08:23.780 Like you still get it like I don't think women like we realize how much we like need attention from men
00:08:28.180 Yeah, like we need like we need I agree with that and so like right now you're still young
00:08:32.420 You're still attractive. You're still gonna get attention from men, but like at 40 to 50 women become basically invisible 0.97
00:08:38.580 Yeah, I know that does scare me actually
00:08:40.900 I thought about that and so and so if you don't if you don't get a husband before then like
00:08:44.900 What does life look like your your parents will pass away at some point?
00:08:48.580 Yeah, your siblings will have their own families like if you don't start thinking long-term like what what does your life look like?
00:08:54.660 And I don't say this to be mean
00:08:55.940 No, no, no
00:08:57.060 It's a good question
00:08:57.860 If you're in the position you're in already, you can't do anything to like yeah
00:09:01.380 To change it. Yeah, but it's like you know if you want to be in a position where you're happier
00:09:06.340 Like wouldn't it make sense to maybe start put that away?
00:09:08.660 Maybe but um
00:09:11.700 I don't know
00:09:12.340 I feel like there's so much in my life
00:09:14.820 I'm trying to sort out first like my mental health and my family issues and a lot of my childhood trauma that I still have to deal with daily
00:09:21.620 So I'm trying to sort that out first because I feel like I can't think straight at the moment my head
00:09:25.540 It's just like one big tornado
00:09:27.540 So trauma like what do you mean you need to go through like because I never understand when people say childhood trauma
00:09:33.380 Like when I was younger, I was essayed and um, it was my mom's boyfriend. So
00:09:39.940 Like that was quite intense, you know
00:09:42.980 I'm not getting upset. It's just a bit, you know
00:09:45.380 Um, yeah, so how long have you been going to therapy for it?
00:09:49.300 Um, I was going when I was 16 for a year and then I stopped before I didn't need it anymore
00:09:55.220 And then I've only been going for about five months now
00:09:58.260 well, because it's just the
00:10:00.260 The the sad thing about this therapy is it just seems like they just kind of make money off of their patients instead of
00:10:07.220 Trying to get you guys out
00:10:09.220 And I think a lot of times that's like women doing it 1.00
00:10:11.620 I know I know maybe you had the bad experience with the guy, but it might make sense to try to find a different
00:10:16.340 Yeah, I guess so, you know that just because like what what does your future look like you have to figure out how to move on
00:10:21.860 Yeah, yeah, definitely
00:10:23.860 Yeah, okay
00:10:25.460 And sometimes there are things that you can't actually get over so looking at it endlessly you it makes you live in the moment
00:10:31.780 Yeah, I always feel like I'm I wake up and I'm still living in the past still like my head just keeps living in the past
00:10:37.860 But you know, and I've just found that if I focus more on the future you don't live as much in the past
00:10:42.580 Yeah, you know, like right now you're not even thinking like long term. Yeah
00:10:47.060 Also, if you had a partner one that was good for you not just any old partner if you were focused on them
00:10:52.900 Yeah, and they're focused on you then you also wouldn't have to I feel like that is why I do hate my job because I don't glamorize
00:10:58.820 Sex work at all. I think don't start it. It does ruin your life
00:11:02.180 Ruins your mentality and it ruins how you view men and how men should view you so
00:11:07.380 Yeah, I if I could sit here and regret doing sex work
00:11:11.460 I probably would regret it only because the stuff I put on the internet as well because that's not me
00:11:16.260 That's just what I've done for money and you shouldn't have to do them things for money
00:11:20.420 To you know, you're losing your not morals, but it could have been private
00:11:26.420 Yeah, it could have been private and I feel like where I was a bit younger and I was getting too excited because of the money
00:11:31.620 I had no parents to guide me. I kind of lost the control and now I'm in this situation
00:11:38.660 But um, yeah, I'm just thinking there's like steps you could take to get out of it because you know, it's like you can
00:11:45.700 You're able to make savings put it away
00:11:48.820 Because I'm just thinking like you're you're a pretty girl
00:11:51.220 There's ways to monetize your beauty in a different way. You can start a youtube channel. Yeah reaction. Yeah, you could do you could do
00:11:58.660 sales
00:11:59.460 Yeah, I don't
00:12:00.820 What would sales people hundred percent sex work? 0.94
00:12:03.780 Well, it's what's interesting to me and this is actually something like I said when I was dating a gal that turned out to be a 0.94
00:12:08.900 A stripper and like a really popular one apparently 1.00
00:12:12.180 um
00:12:12.740 What really interested me in her psychology?
00:12:15.060 She was probably the best person i've ever met at just reading men and just understand
00:12:19.460 Like I don't believe that anybody really knows human nature like sex workers do
00:12:22.900 That's so they really like these girls learn that yeah 1.00
00:12:25.540 She can look she can look at a guy and I guarantee it 0.93
00:12:27.620 I've met you like two minutes ago
00:12:28.980 We were gonna show it's like she can look at a guy and immediately know
00:12:31.780 How much money he has would he cheat on his wife and how quickly?
00:12:34.820 And like and she knows she would you know, you know, right?
00:12:36.740 She's like yeah, of course because the gal I was with she was like she would look at a guy 1.00
00:12:39.860 She's like
00:12:40.820 I'm like, oh that guy's my friend. He was married
00:12:42.340 She's like, oh, he would cheat on his wife in a minute 1.00
00:12:43.540 I'm like really she's and she would just know she's like I know the look I know
00:12:45.780 I know the feel I know the energy like they just
00:12:47.540 Understand that so yes, it definitely is good for sales, but coming I know that you did not like sales and that's fine
00:12:52.740 I loved sales. I'll tell you. No, no, no, I don't mind sales. I hate selling copiers. Yes
00:12:58.180 We had a guy in our company. We had a guy in our company. That's like one of our top sales people
00:13:00.980 He used to sell copiers came to us. He likes his life now
00:13:02.900 But there is something to sales that I think is really really important tying into this
00:13:09.460 How you feel and like all the emotional stuff. I mean, obviously like that's that's a battle you have to you have to
00:13:14.500 You have to fight that's a battle you have to win. It is what it is. Everybody has some
00:13:19.700 Trauma not at the same level, you know, we're different, but everybody comes everybody's family is left up in some way or another
00:13:24.900 Like it's just a fact we all are, you know
00:13:26.820 And one thing i'm really glad about like when I was 20 years old and I felt like I was a victim of the world
00:13:32.500 And I think a lot of people, you know at a young age feel like they're victims like no
00:13:35.540 I'm not the best looking no, I'm not the smartest no
00:13:37.700 I'm not this the that I don't have a big brother to teach me things
00:13:40.820 If I was 20 the internet wasn't like a huge thing, which is kind of crazy
00:13:44.820 So we didn't have these podcasts to learn about life
00:13:47.460 Which is why I appreciate what pearl does so much because you know, we get to learn about life
00:13:52.020 I was really really lucky to to take a sales position where people probably cared about the money
00:13:57.620 I was making them more than they cared about me
00:13:59.940 But at least the steps that I needed to take to build myself included a significant amount of discipline
00:14:05.460 A significant amount of accountability and being honest with myself because I didn't get paid if I didn't sell anything
00:14:10.260 So so I was had to be very brutally honest with myself and extremely disciplined
00:14:13.860 But what really helped was getting around another group of people around me that were disciplined and growing and they didn't resent my success
00:14:20.660 They celebrated my success and I celebrated their success and when I failed they didn't crap on me
00:14:25.860 They said hey you failed
00:14:27.380 Let's work together to make you better if you want to be better, you know
00:14:30.340 And so one of the things actually we we do in our company is and I think tate and those guys have the war room
00:14:35.700 People like the war was I think that's brilliant. I think just giving men men a place to meet other ambitious successful or striving men
00:14:42.980 That's better than school
00:14:44.180 Yeah, and that's we need that we do the same thing in our company
00:14:46.580 Like we bring guys in and and we literally mold them and work with them to make them more accountable to grow and do some guys resent it?
00:14:52.820 Yes, they leave and they resent it because they don't like to be in an environment where they feel like they're not enough
00:14:57.620 But other guys flourish in that environment and as a man i'm talking from a man's perspective
00:15:02.260 You don't have like a woman can cry and still move into another man's life a couple years later men don't have that option 0.53
00:15:07.860 Like we need to be building all the time and if you feel like you're a dude and you're a little bit victimized
00:15:12.740 It's time to step up and get around people that will help you grow
00:15:16.340 I agree with that