JustPearlyThings - November 01, 2023


Tiktok Feminist DEMOLISHES @JustPearlyThings


Episode Stats


Length

8 minutes

Words per minute

176.75645

Word count

1,564

Sentence count

111

Harmful content

Misogyny

28

sentences flagged

Hate speech

17

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, I talk about a clip I saw on TikTok about women leaving their marriages and why they should have left. I also talk about why women are more likely to be abused than men in long term relationships.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 Sometimes I go on TikTok and TikTok's interesting.
00:00:03.320 I usually go on to catch up on my true crime.
00:00:06.740 I've been following the Idaho murders case lately.
00:00:09.920 That's a good one.
00:00:11.580 But a lot of times on TikTok, I just see these like crazy conspiracy theories about me or
00:00:17.660 just all these people just, you know, I'm not too popular on TikTok, I guess.
00:00:22.600 But there was a woman that I guess destroyed me. 1.00
00:00:26.420 I guess I have been destroyed on TikTok.
00:00:29.880 And I'm very excited to see it.
00:00:31.820 I guess she gave me some logic and facts and I'm super excited to see it.
00:00:37.380 Enlighten me, feminists. 1.00
00:00:38.620 The people that believe in divorce go be in long-term relationships.
00:00:42.720 Leave marriage for the people that actually believe in for better or for worse, for richer
00:00:46.960 or for poorer, in sickness and in health till death do us part.
00:00:50.000 Do you know what drives me nuts about this clip?
00:00:51.880 It's that she's operating off a premise that women are getting married with the intention 1.00
00:00:55.660 of getting divorced.
00:00:56.560 But they're not making commitments with the intention of breaking them.
00:01:00.080 They're just making commitments to men who are careful not to reveal themselves until
00:01:03.980 after the wedding is over.
00:01:05.640 And that happens because of how seriously women take their commitments. 1.00
00:01:09.560 They fight so hard to keep their families together.
00:01:11.800 And they've been conditioned to be the one who feels fault if it fails.
00:01:15.580 And people can end up taking advantage of that.
00:01:18.600 Women end up staying when they should probably leave because they've been sold the myth of the 1.00
00:01:22.940 infamous rough patch and they keep telling themselves it will get better despite the fact that it keeps
00:01:27.540 getting worse.
00:01:28.200 They sacrifice themselves for what they've been told is the good of the family.
00:01:32.660 So these women end up being abused because of how sacred they hold their vows. 1.00
00:01:37.000 And yet you have the audacity to act like they're just walking away like it means nothing.
00:01:41.460 They're not just walking away because he's poorer than the day they met.
00:01:44.560 In fact, she usually gets a second job if he loses his and continues to cook dinner nightly.
00:01:50.680 And that's also why she hasn't had her nails done in seven years if you even bother to ask her. 1.00
00:01:55.240 Marriage vows mean so much to so many people but you do not stand on an altar and say for better
00:02:00.680 or for worse and to my own destruction.
00:02:03.480 Women stay for the love they have for who that man used to be. 0.99
00:02:07.140 Or because their family threatens to disown them.
00:02:09.700 Or because a church told them that that's their duty.
00:02:11.940 Or because they have a child who looks up at them and asks them where daddy is at bedtime.
00:02:16.800 This is not as easy as you make it out to be.
00:02:19.380 And you need to stop shaming people for living a life you've never lived.
00:02:23.220 You don't get to interpret someone's vows unless you've walked in their shoes and lived with their
00:02:27.080 partner behind closed doors.
00:02:28.820 Because for better or for worse should never mean staying in a situation that's worse than you ever
00:02:33.660 could have imagined.
00:02:34.960 What?
00:02:36.080 What?
00:02:37.800 Well, let me let me get this straight.
00:02:39.740 For better or for worse should not mean staying in a situation that is worse than you imagined.
00:02:49.180 Well, when women imagine that marriage is going to be this Disney fairy tale that's so amazing 0.74
00:02:55.220 and awesome, of course, I expect them to stay together even if it's worse than they imagined.
00:03:03.780 So let's go through her claims, okay?
00:03:05.580 Because I wrote some of these down.
00:03:06.760 One, women are not getting abused left, right, and center. 0.51
00:03:11.640 No, no, no, no, no, no.
00:03:13.820 That is not the case and I will have to beat this out of you guys.
00:03:17.200 No, stop saying that women are the more likely party to be abused.
00:03:21.520 Most abusive situations, the parties are abusing each other.
00:03:26.100 Sorry guys, but you attract what you are.
00:03:28.360 If you are constantly attracting abusive partners, it is possible that maybe you are abusive as well.
00:03:36.100 When it comes to one-sided abuse, where one party is hitting the other and they are not reciprocating,
00:03:42.620 even with the under-reporting that we know men under-report this stuff,
00:03:47.480 women are more likely to be abusive than be abused. 1.00
00:03:51.780 Women are just as abusive, if not more abusive than men. 1.00
00:03:56.220 The second thing that she points out, I want you to see how women view commitment.
00:04:03.900 Men care about actions. 0.97
00:04:05.820 Your intentions do not matter.
00:04:07.820 I don't care if you took the vows and didn't intend to get divorced,
00:04:12.220 if you still got divorced because you saw some TikToks.
00:04:16.520 Sorry, this idea that women are leaving left and right for good reasons is just not true. 1.00
00:04:22.280 Most of the time when women leave, it's because they are not submissive, 1.00
00:04:25.900 they were not raised to be a wife, and they do not take their vows seriously.
00:04:30.160 They were sold a Disney dream that their husband should have everything and will have no flaws,
00:04:35.080 and are in a gynocentric social order that tells them they're amazing, special, and awesome all the time,
00:04:40.700 and never talk about what they do wrong in a relationship.
00:04:45.040 Women overwhelmingly do not fight for marriages. 0.97
00:04:48.360 Men put up with fat wives, they put up with wives that do not sleep with them, 1.00
00:04:53.100 and they put up with controlling wives, all because they care about the children.
00:04:57.420 But women will divorce men because the man says, 1.00
00:04:59.920 please don't go to the club, sweetheart.
00:05:01.960 Or maybe you don't get your nails done for seven years.
00:05:06.020 Notice how in her language she talks about how getting your nails done is something you're entitled to,
00:05:12.140 even though she hasn't had her nails done in seven years.
00:05:14.940 Ladies, why is this stuff so important?
00:05:17.640 Why do you feel entitled to makeup, Botox, and getting your nails done?
00:05:22.540 Once you have a child, it's not about you.
00:05:25.060 We live in a me, me, me, me, me world.
00:05:29.480 And they forget that really, when you have children,
00:05:33.020 you're supposed to dedicate your life to those children.
00:05:36.460 Your feelings don't matter anymore.
00:05:39.580 And women overwhelmingly do not get a second job. 1.00
00:05:42.700 Even in relationships that are closer to 50-50, the man still out-earned the women, typically. 0.99
00:05:49.680 So there were some comments, you know, of me just getting destroyed,
00:05:54.880 saying Pearl's just saying things, to be honest.
00:05:58.000 And you'll notice that most of the Maya critics and detractors are overweight or older single women. 0.96
00:06:04.800 Pearl doesn't think through what she's even saying.
00:06:06.980 No, guys, I've actually thought it through completely.
00:06:09.140 If you take a vow that says you are going to do something, you should do it.
00:06:13.040 Women do not take it seriously in 2023. 1.00
00:06:15.600 They like the idea of marriage.
00:06:17.400 But when it comes to actually doing the hard stuff, they don't stick it out.
00:06:21.540 So there was a woman that actually had a divorce party. 1.00
00:06:24.860 Let's pull it up.
00:06:25.420 Gabby, what are we celebrating?
00:06:28.500 My divorce!
00:06:33.240 This is disgusting.
00:06:35.640 It is absolutely disgusting that you would celebrate the erosion of a family.
00:06:40.880 Guys, when you grow up in a single mother home, you are more likely to go to prison. 0.53
00:06:46.160 You are more likely to be a rapist.
00:06:48.200 You are more likely to be a mass shooter.
00:06:50.800 You are more likely to run away from home.
00:06:52.900 You are more likely to be enrolled in a mental institution.
00:06:56.600 You are more likely to drop out of high school.
00:06:59.560 Every negative thing in society is linked to single motherhood. 1.00
00:07:03.860 And yet women parade and cheer each other on as they do it. 1.00
00:07:08.080 The last woman that was criticizing me said, 1.00
00:07:11.020 it's not like women just do this for no reason. 0.97
00:07:13.700 Yet we have women throwing parties about something that is genuinely sad. 0.86
00:07:18.000 Something that you are supposed to take seriously.
00:07:20.300 How can we say women are taking this seriously when we are having parties celebrating it? 1.00
00:07:26.620 That shit is disgusting.
00:07:29.000 That is disgusting.
00:07:30.540 In no world should you be celebrating a divorce.
00:07:34.680 And it's interesting, guys.
00:07:36.180 Notice that the comments section, when it comes from men,
00:07:40.600 is a lot more honest than from women.
00:07:42.600 Because women comments tend to cheer this shit on. 1.00
00:07:45.260 Or male comments tend to really tell you how it is.
00:07:49.560 So this guy, Butt Tobani, says,
00:07:53.600 it doesn't look like she's happy about the divorce.
00:07:55.620 That's how it looks to me, though.
00:07:57.420 Another commenter says,
00:07:59.240 I need a follow-up in a year to see if she sounds like Tyrese's ex. 0.97
00:08:03.600 Yes.
00:08:04.060 And a lot of women leave these situations 1.00
00:08:06.200 thinking the grass is greener on the other side.
00:08:09.020 They think that all the men that give them attention
00:08:11.580 actually want to date them.
00:08:13.980 When really, they just want you for a weekend.
00:08:17.040 They don't want you long-term.
00:08:18.840 I cannot stress this enough.
00:08:20.540 The majority of single mothers do not remarry.
00:08:24.000 And if they remarry, they are more likely to divorce than they are to stay with their partner.
00:08:29.300 15% roughly of single moms get remarried. 0.93
00:08:32.680 22% get a guy to live with them.
00:08:35.980 Meaning 60%, the overwhelming majority, do not remarry.
00:08:41.120 And why does every single mother think that she is special? 1.00
00:08:44.600 Every child you have with a man decreases your sexual market value by at least a point.