Women Who Abandon Their Children (Call-in Show) | Pearl Daily
Episode Stats
Length
2 hours and 11 minutes
Words per Minute
171.61354
Hate Speech Sentences
122
Summary
A fascinating debate has broken out about the value of marriage for men, with some arguing that it s bad for men to get married, and others saying it s good for women. I think we ve all been taught that marriage is a bond, and it s a sacred bond. It s a machine designed to extract resources from you. Marriage is a terrible deal for men because if me and you were in a business contract where I am paid to leave, what could go wrong there?
Transcript
00:00:02.880
Most answered very quickly, no, because men are useless.
00:00:11.400
Most young men are single, most young women are not.
00:00:14.400
Young men have fallen faster than any demographic in America over the last 40 years.
00:00:19.080
It's a different world now, like we don't need men the way that they used to.
00:00:24.960
Men and women are drifting further apart, and society is crumbling because of it.
00:00:32.860
A fascinating debate has broken out about the value of marriage.
00:00:36.160
You've kind of got the trad con versus red pill thing.
00:00:38.860
This men's rights crowd that sometimes just goes too far the other way.
00:00:42.420
You need to stop acting like grown boys and infants and actually become men.
00:00:48.980
It's a machine designed to extract resources from you.
00:00:52.080
Now many of the red-pilled have taken the position that it's bad for men to get married.
00:01:00.720
One of the most controversial faces in all of the internet.
00:01:04.400
She goes on to say that marriage is a terrible deal for men.
00:01:07.200
Because if me and you were in a business contract, you would never sign a contract where I am paid to leave.
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74% or something of divorces are initiated by women.
00:01:18.140
Men have everything to lose, primarily their own children.
00:01:20.780
Men get killed by the courts and by divorce laws.
00:01:23.700
I had no idea that courts of family law were courts of equity, not courts of law.
00:01:28.640
Because in family court, you don't need evidence to accuse someone of abuse.
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When you guys say get married young, a lot of these men don't know what they're signing up for,
00:01:36.660
and you're not going to be there when their entire life falls apart.
00:01:41.780
I didn't meet my son until he was 15 months old.
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You're literally just thrown out onto the street.
00:01:52.760
We absolutely reinforce bad behavior from women.
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Wives are taught to leave their husbands, and then daughters grow up without their fathers.
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Every problem in society comes from single mother homes.
00:02:04.300
A lot of women will just chase this negative rabbit hole of happiness, endless happiness.
00:02:08.660
Feminism's biggest failure is it lies to women.
00:02:10.600
We tell women to date as many guys as possible.
00:02:16.940
You are allowed to end a relationship with a really great boyfriend.
00:02:24.460
I don't think there's anything else in life that we actually ever go into preparing to fail.
00:02:28.520
Like, if you have the mentality of this is going to go wrong and be pessimistic, naturally,
00:02:32.920
the outcome is going to be that it's going to fail anyway.
00:02:36.620
Like, women are so willing to leave marriages because they're not happy.
00:02:41.320
The most important thing is the children, and the problem is we have a modern society
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where it's me, me, me, my feelings, leave when I feel like it, instead of doing what's
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This myth that we live in an age of male privilege, where's my male privilege?
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Why doesn't our society care about men's rights?
00:03:04.000
I have no friends, no white, and no social life.
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I've seen so many men on the brink of suicide, and they didn't do anything wrong.
00:03:16.300
How are you equal if the men are the ones that have to fight and die to defend the country?
00:03:21.680
The men are the ones that build and maintain all the infrastructure.
00:03:28.200
The so-called deaths of despair from suicide, overdose, or alcohol, three times higher among
00:03:45.860
Everybody knows this is a huge problem, but nobody wants to admit it.
00:03:49.540
Every single woman at the table said they wanted a man to get...
00:03:55.000
Everything is really set up against you to fail as a man.
00:03:57.260
If men make less than women, women don't want to marry them.
00:04:00.820
So you know who wants more economically and emotionally viable men?
00:04:06.220
I don't want to be an independent woman anymore.
00:04:08.360
I don't want to be a strong, independent woman.
00:04:26.960
Now it's just hookup culture is going to be our fairytale ending because men don't want
00:04:32.620
The future, if everybody follows your path, is there is no future.
00:04:36.880
We go into population decline and our economy goes into decline.
00:04:45.140
This is an existential crisis failing young men.
00:04:57.040
Welcome to another episode here of Pearl Daily.
00:05:01.340
And today we're going to talk about when women take an L.
00:05:08.160
Well, women that can't even be mothers, that they are such bad mothers and just overall
00:05:19.080
But before we get started, guys, if you do want to support the documentary trailer that
00:05:24.160
I showed you guys bringing in, we are trying to raise $100,000 when we get to around there.
00:05:28.940
We can actually hire a team to do this documentary.
00:05:35.460
You guys are amazing, but we do got to get to around $100,000.
00:05:39.000
I have a million as the goal because shooters shoot, you know what I mean?
00:05:44.560
If we could get, at a million dollars, we could get like a Netflix-grade documentary with the
00:05:52.320
But, you know, if we get to $100,000, I can hire.
00:05:56.600
I can, we can, it doesn't got to be like an A-level.
00:06:00.660
Anyways, so, welcome to another episode of Pearl Daily.
00:06:06.420
Now, the goal of modern feminism is to hold men accountable while allowing women to do
00:06:14.980
The double standards that come from this are absolutely disgusting.
00:06:19.060
A woman can be fat and be praised, but a man has to be in shape to attract a broke, fat
00:06:27.820
Women are praised for being single while men are called incels if they choose not to deal
00:06:34.000
A woman can abort a child, but a man can't give away his parental rights.
00:06:40.260
If a man doesn't want to be in a child's life, he's automatically the villain.
00:06:44.220
But if a woman does the same thing, she's praised as being stunning and brave.
00:06:51.960
Feminists in the media paint any man that is not involved with his children as a deadbeat
00:07:01.220
Never mind that most women choose to have children out of wedlock are typically their demons that
00:07:08.880
actively try to keep the children away from the father.
00:07:11.920
These women keep fathers out of their lives while still trying to pursue their own selfish
00:07:18.900
These women leave the children alone to figure out how to navigate the world by themselves.
00:07:26.740
And in extreme cases, mothers will abandon their children.
00:07:31.260
It's crazy to see that society seeks to understand why mothers walk away, but show no empathy for
00:07:45.980
So there was a talk show done with three women that left their children with their, sorry,
00:07:54.020
a woman who left her three children with the dad.
00:08:02.180
You have two kids, a 10-year-old daughter and a nine-year-old son.
00:08:05.520
Now you made the decision to leave them with their dad just four months ago.
00:08:12.640
Because ultimately it's because 50-50 shared care doesn't work.
00:08:17.040
And I've been, I guess we tried to do this for a while.
00:08:22.860
And I don't think 50-50 shared care works when you have lots of conflict between two parents.
00:08:29.560
After I had tried to seek relocation of the kids to come to Sydney, back to Sydney to
00:08:34.680
live, because we were living in Port Macquarie.
00:08:38.860
So it's four and a half hours away, but there's not a lot of employment opportunities.
00:08:43.080
And yeah, just didn't have anything more to offer for me.
00:08:49.580
My ex-partner, you know, he's established in Port Macquarie.
00:08:52.300
He's not going to, he's fought this hard, I mean, we've both fought for the kids.
00:09:01.460
And it's just because I couldn't live in this limbo anymore.
00:09:06.740
Yeah, so I would imagine that's probably, I don't know Australia, but I'm guessing that's
00:09:11.200
So she's like, I want sex in the city lifestyle.
00:09:14.300
But now I'm stuck in this small town with no career opportunity because of these kids
00:09:21.740
I chose to have that I'm just not feeling anymore.
00:09:30.800
Tell me a bit about your background, about your family background, your own.
00:09:51.020
Just if we stop and take a moment to think about Aboriginal people, you know, we're dying
00:10:02.440
And it's crazy because she's going to talk about this is what women will try to save the
00:10:09.100
world before they try to save their own home, their own marriage or their own children.
00:10:14.600
That's why women do terrible in politics because usually their own home isn't like they can't
00:10:24.060
How are they going to fix the world's problems?
00:10:25.740
And it's women's responsibility to fix the relationship and fix the marriage.
00:10:33.340
Some would argue provide, even though women don't even really seem to want men to do that
00:10:47.380
And, you know, so for me, how I'm going, I've done something with myself.
00:10:55.220
I've broken down the cycle of welfare dependency.
00:10:58.820
I'm trying to do something with my life, you know, and I think that that's admirable.
00:11:03.280
I'm trying to teach my kids the right way, that you've got to work hard.
00:11:09.360
So how did you weigh up that decision to come here without them?
00:11:16.260
What it meant to them was if you ever asked them to choose, they never would ever choose
00:11:27.640
It has nothing to do with who's a better parent.
00:11:30.180
So what I'm hearing is there's no real reason for you to leave and that you were causing
00:11:39.880
Imagine if this was a dad who did the same thing.
00:11:46.240
But, you know, they would all be screaming at him.
00:11:51.360
I had to think about what was best for them ultimately.
00:12:02.200
I want them to feel safe and secure and stable in one environment.
00:12:07.120
And I knew that they would have that with their dad versus still continue.
00:12:11.480
Now, I actually think that more women could do this.
00:12:17.680
A woman who gives up custody and wants nothing to do with you or a woman dragging you to court
00:12:29.400
I would love to see this be like a normal thing.
00:12:36.620
Continuing going backwards and forwards from houses.
00:12:43.040
What sort of things are going through your mind at the moment about that decision you've made?
00:12:46.980
I wake up every day and I think to myself, have I done the right thing?
00:12:57.120
I have never met a kid from a single father home that turned out messed up.
00:13:00.720
And to be honest, she probably did do the right thing.
00:13:05.000
You might as well give the kids to the dad because they're naturally selfless.
00:13:11.040
I mean, I think that no mother is better than a mother that's a bad influence.
00:13:15.100
Because a mother that's a bad influence can turn the kids against the father.
00:13:22.140
I worry what people think of me as a woman and as a mother.
00:13:32.720
I want to be making breakfast with them and helping them with their homework.
00:13:39.880
You can't be a good mom and abandon your kids, lady.
00:13:50.500
And what she's really crying about is her reputation, which is essentially ruined because of this choice.
00:13:57.260
You know, I'm in an empty house and there's no little footsteps.
00:14:04.760
But then I have to say to myself, you know, you're strong.
00:14:11.560
And then one day these kids, they'll come to me and they'll also see what I'm trying to do.
00:14:22.120
I've been trying to create social change with everything that I do.
00:14:28.460
It's about, you know, advocating for Indigenous rights.
00:14:32.860
It's about enabling, you know, whether it be corporate.
00:14:44.960
What she's saying is she doesn't really like the guy she reproduced with.
00:14:52.500
Government to engage with, you know, successfully with the Indigenous community.
00:14:56.500
Like, you know, I just want to be a positive role model.
00:15:09.860
I think my son, throughout all of this process since 2012, he's never.
00:15:18.000
Greg in the chat said, I took responsibility for getting serious with a party girl.
00:15:27.340
I don't want to say you should impregnate a crackhead.
00:15:30.680
Like, I don't like to say should on this channel.
00:15:33.040
But I want to talk about the pros of getting a crackhead pregnant.
00:15:37.660
Because, you know, I met the single father the other day.
00:15:40.640
You guys, when I meet you guys in person, the fans.
00:15:45.560
Actually, I do think we should have a talk about public things.
00:15:55.420
But if I'm ever somewhere where there's a lot of women.
00:16:01.980
I just, I kind of tread carefully because I don't, women are crazy.
00:16:07.340
I don't know what they're going to do to me, you know.
00:16:10.900
But you're like, I fear women a little bit, you know.
00:16:16.940
But anyway, so the single dad was telling me about a situation impregnating a crackhead.
00:16:40.080
I'm like, is your kid, is he like mentally, you know, because of the crack?
00:16:53.900
So, you know, I don't know if a deadbeat mom is the worst thing in the world.
00:16:58.340
I think it almost gives the kid more, a better shot at life.
00:17:09.640
Like, you'll be trying to improve something about yourself or in your career or whatever.
00:17:20.880
And the women will just nitpick at everything you do.
00:17:24.920
I'll be trying to improve, you know, the show or whatever.
00:17:34.540
It's like, they're always telling you what you're not doing.
00:17:41.500
So I would love to see a world where there's more deadbeat mothers.
00:17:45.340
And I think it's, I think it's actually amazing because if the mothers are deadbeats,
00:17:51.140
the women can go be exactly who they are, which is whores that want to go live sex in the city lifestyle.
00:17:57.200
But that's great for you young guys out there trying to get laid.
00:18:00.460
So it's really a win-win because they can give birth, they can give the dad the kid,
00:18:08.080
They can go ruin some other guy's life who can just dump him.
00:18:20.580
It's almost like it's just sort of gone over his head.
00:18:23.100
But my daughter, it's been had the highest impact on.
00:18:26.400
She's very emotional and she gets really upset.
00:18:35.920
I have to check myself to make sure that I don't allow my emotions to reflect onto the children.
00:18:45.220
I have to be really mindful of that and it gets really, really hard because I just want to tell them,
00:18:52.060
I'm trying to make this world a better place for you and I want you to be proud of me.
00:18:57.880
And mothers care more about looking good to the world than helping their kids' world.
00:19:04.660
They just have a tendency to care more about looking good to the planet rather than, like, you know,
00:19:24.320
Michael says, my daughter was raised by me after the divorce and my ex-wife, she turned out pretty good.
00:19:29.800
Away from my ex-wife, she turned out pretty good.
00:19:32.020
Graduated high school, didn't get knocked up as a teenager and wasn't a stripper.
00:19:35.920
I've never met a kid raised by a single father that didn't turn out pretty good.
00:19:40.060
I mean, one of the reasons I wanted to come and talk to people is to help me, to help me feel more better in the decision and to know that I'm not alone.
00:19:55.740
I want to, I want, I came on the news to rationalize abandoning my kids to make me feel better about the decision.
00:20:03.880
If men, men are okay with being the villain, they understand sometimes you're just the villain in some people's stories.
00:20:13.760
They don't have to prove that they're a good person.
00:20:17.780
But to speak out, I think this is a really important issue that we're not hearing about.
00:20:24.040
For me, I feel, I thought this would be really good for me because it's early days and I thought it's part of that process in trying to cope.
00:20:35.460
I wanted to hear what other people's stories were and, you know, form a bit of a network so that I'd get some support.
00:20:43.620
But I also think it's such a taboo topic that I've really wanted to put it out there.
00:20:50.320
And I wanted to say to people that have been knocking me, this is where it ends.
00:21:00.740
I've backed myself 100% and this is what I've chosen to do.
00:21:19.520
Doug MPA, you're going to be, you know what's crazy?
00:21:23.460
He's driving him nuts that I didn't have a mouse.
00:21:33.240
Just a few days ago, Oakland County Sheriff's deputies came to this house behind me, which
00:21:43.740
is on Lydia Lane, to do a welfare check on a woman.
00:21:46.740
But when they got inside, they didn't find her.
00:21:49.300
But they did find her three kids who have been abandoned and living and deplorable.
00:21:57.860
I married a good Christian girl instead of a crack addict.
00:22:00.420
Yeah, the Christian girl, when she lies about you, people will believe her.
00:22:08.520
Doug MPA, could you put this in our show notes for Wednesday?
00:22:11.900
Because I'm kind of, this is like a working theory.
00:22:14.460
The good Christian woman, if she drags you to court,
00:22:18.300
she'll believe, they'll believe her, but they're not going to believe some crack addict.
00:22:27.840
Like, crack addict can't do that much damage to your reputation.
00:22:32.300
The crack addict's not going to remember to get an abortion.
00:22:34.940
She doesn't even remember where she got her crack from.
00:22:38.260
So, I'm riffing on this, but I'm going to continue.
00:22:46.240
Like, oh my God, this is right in our neighborhood.
00:22:50.540
Pontiac resident Emma Gross lives a few streets over from the home where the kids were found.
00:22:55.000
The Oakland County Sheriff's Office says the house was covered in piles of trash
00:23:01.840
There was even mold and human feces throughout the house.
00:23:04.960
It's pretty heartbreaking that the kids would have to live under those conditions.
00:23:10.540
Sheriff Michael Bouchard tells me a 15-year-old boy and his two sisters,
00:23:14.120
ages 12 and 13, hadn't been outside the home in years
00:23:17.500
and were surviving off of weekly drop-offs of prepared food.
00:23:21.080
It kind of reminds me of the, you know, commercials you see where animals are living
00:23:30.240
And that's what the kids were living in, four years.
00:23:33.200
The boy told deputies that his mother abandoned them back in either 2020 or 2021.
00:23:38.860
Deputies were recently called because the land...
00:23:46.020
Crackheads, if you can get a healthy baby are better.
00:23:56.540
The landlord of the home asked for them to do a welfare check.
00:24:00.020
The landlord said he hadn't seen her for some time.
00:24:04.700
that hadn't paid her rent going back to October.
00:24:09.200
and Bouchard says she had been living somewhere else in Pontiac.
00:24:12.200
The kids hadn't been in school since they were abandoned.
00:24:14.780
Well, that's going to be a very long process to figure this all out.
00:24:18.540
Not just how they are, both mentally and physically,
00:24:21.640
but how did this ever happen to have these kids fall through the cracks on so many levels
00:24:26.880
with relatives, the community, and with schools?
00:24:33.080
I've seen, you know, child neglect and other situations where they're living in bad places,
00:24:38.180
but not to this level and not for this extended, extended duration.
00:24:43.600
The mother will be facing criminal charges, and in the meantime,
00:24:52.540
Time now for a little bit of electric church music.
00:24:56.760
So this woman left these children in a house by themselves and just said,
00:25:05.380
All right, so there's a woman leaves her kids with a grandma for a younger man.
00:25:10.660
Okay, so she met a younger woman, and now she's on live saying that she doesn't want to be a mother.
00:25:36.820
And so I'm dropping these kids off so me and him can live our lives.
00:25:45.780
It's time for me to be happy, and I just want to be happy and stress-free without these children.
00:26:06.740
I was demonetized for a long time, so I'm trying to rebuild my life and get this documentary out,
00:26:19.260
Imagine so many mothers out there do not prioritize their children.
00:26:26.040
But in the long term, they're just not fit to be parents.
00:26:31.780
And if they could give the kids to the father, I would love to see more of this.
00:26:45.640
Well, I hope that you respect my decision on moving on with my life with my new man and
00:26:56.360
Well, I don't know what to tell you because I'm not doing it.
00:26:58.640
I'm just letting you know right now I'm not doing it.
00:27:12.600
Women would rather a kid being like foster care than give it to the father.
00:27:21.540
And this is the last time you're going to do this.
00:27:29.520
Well, it's not my plan to be a grandmother that's going to take care of somebody's three
00:27:35.980
Like, how do you make that mistake three times?
00:27:40.400
I feel like they're not responsible anymore, that they don't want to be a mother anymore
00:27:54.620
I really think there's like waves we could make if we got
00:27:59.020
two full-time people in-house where I just, the amount of content we could put out.
00:28:05.100
But the thing is, it's going to take a lot of like fundraising basically to get them out
00:28:11.980
So, but there's a lot of projects I really believe we could get done.
00:28:18.720
But you're going to have, do you understand that you're going to have to do this?
00:28:22.820
Okay, but I can't, do you understand that I'm not going to take care of your children?
00:28:35.780
You take your grandkids so I can live my life stress-free.
00:28:40.260
Okay, but the reason that I could not teach you how to be a mother, Angel, is because I
00:28:54.300
Can you imagine being the kid, like watching this?
00:28:58.060
Because kids, they don't always understand it later, but they will understand it when they
00:29:02.880
They're, sorry, at the time, but they get older and things make sense, you know.
00:29:16.520
Of your three kids that you had, because you're disrespectful, you just come over here and
00:29:25.140
You just told me I was going to have to raise them.
00:29:31.100
I can't even believe I'm hearing this from you right now.
00:29:33.780
I cannot believe that you actually think that I'm supposed to say it's okay, that I'm just
00:29:37.980
going to just give up my life, my freedom, to raise three kids and not even mine.
00:30:13.360
Matter of fact, this is all your responsibility from this point on.
00:30:16.700
You should have thought about that after you had the first one and then the second one.
00:30:40.380
I don't even know where this attitude is coming from.
00:30:45.980
Being a single parent will make you angry, mad, upset, and stressed,
00:30:52.140
But you cannot come over here and drop those children off
00:31:06.680
There's no point of you telling them to get back in the car
00:31:17.720
Hey, what is the point of them getting back in the car?
00:31:44.720
Don't open your legs to lovers who abandon their kids.
00:31:48.040
No, I actually would encourage it because then you guys can get the kids and raise them
00:31:52.540
Like, imagine if the dad was around and she could just give the kids to the dad.
00:32:49.040
Now, there's another article about a woman that left her kids.
00:32:57.260
The overwhelmed heroine of the lost daughter walked out on her kids.
00:33:09.140
The new Netflix film, The Lost Daughter, takes a raw, honest look at the complexities of motherhood.
00:33:15.040
Overwhelmed by her kids' demands and unable to focus on her career, protagonist Letta makes three difficult choices to walk out on her children and husband for three years.
00:33:25.460
Judged and punished by herself and others, an older version of Letta plays a steep price for abandoning her kids.
00:33:32.680
As the film makes clear, it's a taboo double standard in the world where fathers who walk away are considered normal, but mothers who do it are simply vilified.
00:33:43.600
To better understand what drives women, making...
00:33:59.120
Insider talked to three real-life mothers who left their families.
00:34:15.580
Floundering careers and years of grinding childcare without a break.
00:34:19.080
Highlight the immense pressures on women who become parents.
00:34:21.620
Moms are being tasked with some such monumental and unrealistic expectations, says Hillary Bergerger, a licensed professional counselor who founded Work Like a Mother.
00:34:33.300
Men are not expected to shoulder all of the psychological, educational, domestic, and enrichment management of the children in the same way that mothers are.
00:34:45.220
Daniel Lejeune's children were four, six, and ten when she left to attend a six-week poetry residency in Prague, followed by a two-week visit to Savannah, Georgia.
00:34:55.520
Other than two brief trips in the prior year, it was the first time I had been away from the children except to have more children, says Lejeune, who also homeschooled her kids at the time.
00:35:06.400
For ten years, I hadn't been away from them for more than an hour, except when I was having C-sections to have the others.
00:35:13.480
Her spouse did not support her decision to leave, in fact, he told their children she was never coming home.
00:35:21.360
I called them every day, but they would beg and beg for me to come home, she said.
00:35:25.880
As excruciating as it was to be away from her kids, it healed me in ways that I can't explain, she told Insider.
00:35:32.100
The time away gave her clarity she needed to walk away from an unsupportive marriage and taught her a few things about motherhood.
00:35:39.340
I learned that my children did not need me as much as I believed they did, said Lejeune, who now has full custody of her children.
00:35:49.980
She regularly schedules babysitters guilt-free when she needs a few days away.
00:35:55.180
If I hadn't gone on this residency, I would have ended up in a mental institution.
00:35:59.260
It was truly the best thing I could have done, even if it was traumatic for my children.
00:36:03.420
During the last few years of her marriage, Liz Marie Monaco was just going through the motions.
00:36:17.140
Her soon-to-be ex-husband wouldn't move out, and the situation had become toxic on so many levels.
00:36:24.380
I coped the best I could, thinking this was the best way to live life, she said.
00:36:28.660
The last straw was that I didn't want my kids to watch this anymore.
00:36:33.340
It was teaching them all the wrong things about love and marriage.
00:36:36.100
So she decided to leave her three teenagers with their dad, moving half a mile away and making daily visits to cook, clean, and do laundry.
00:36:44.620
Eventually, her visits tapered down to weekends.
00:36:47.020
After three years when her children were in their late teens, she moved out of state to be with her new fiancé.
00:36:51.800
I lost friends and family along the way, Monaco said.
00:36:55.720
Even though I did not just up, leave, and abandon them in the eyes of society and my family, I did.
00:37:02.800
From time to time, still to this day, I still feel pain in my heart for the hurt I caused to my kids.
00:37:12.080
She said her three youngest kids had become more understanding of her choice as they grew older, but her oldest still wasn't talking to her.
00:37:19.700
The stigma of a mom leaving is greater than if the dad leaves.
00:37:24.260
A dad leaving is the norm, but when a mom does in the eyes of society, you're killing a living thing.
00:37:30.140
One mother told Insider that her departure was prompted by a family crisis.
00:37:34.200
After accepting a job in Vienna, her husband had left her in the U.S. to take care of their three- and eight-year-old daughters,
00:37:40.240
the older of whom needed to stay in the country for surgery.
00:37:43.040
By the time her daughter recovered, he had unexpectedly moved to Sarajevo, the capital of Bosnia, Herzegovia.
00:37:52.860
Hoping to keep her family intact, the mother made the move with her daughters,
00:37:56.820
only to face an isolating lifestyle in an unfamiliar city.
00:38:01.080
When a sudden medical emergency forced her to return to the U.S. for care,
00:38:05.760
she had enough room on her credit card for only one flight.
00:38:13.900
I couldn't take them with me and I was utterly burned out by them,
00:38:17.580
said the woman to whom Insider granted anonymity because her now ex-husband was physically abusive.
00:38:38.820
I believed at the time a mother needed to be, and I had no one to admit this to,
00:38:42.820
not to mention the shame of failing at being a mom.
00:38:45.620
Meanwhile, her husband told their daughters that their mother had left them to chase the American dream,
00:38:51.680
but despite the circumstances, she didn't speak up for herself,
00:38:54.540
nor did she disclose her return to California to anyone other than the few people I asked for help.
00:38:59.460
There was a guilty relief in being sick and weak without having to be anything for my children,
00:39:05.600
but also a terrifying feeling of being untethered, she said.
00:39:09.300
Was I being selfish for trying to take care of me?
00:39:15.680
After six months, her husband returned her children to her,
00:39:18.260
telling her that their children need their mother.
00:39:22.540
but trying to keep up with the demands of running a household while as a single parent with a career is exhausting.
00:39:29.280
I was resentful of how little my ex had done and how he was able to disappear for months on end to build his by then successful career, he said.
00:40:07.700
There was absolutely guilt, but I think a lot of that was due to what I thought a mother needed to be and not what I was living up to.
00:40:26.680
So what women do is they rationalize bad decisions as good things.
00:40:31.000
So for example, the body positivity movement, bad thing, right?
00:40:35.400
But we got to rationalize our bad decision to be a good decision.
00:40:41.840
So next we got someone normalizing abandoning the kids with the fathers.
00:40:48.600
Ladies, let's normalize leaving the kids with their fathers.
00:40:57.620
So this is like step two of women's rationalization system is I'm not doing the wrong thing.
00:41:06.740
So now I need to get other women to also pretend they're not doing the wrong thing.
00:41:12.820
I just saw a tick tock of a 29 year old with five kids recently divorced.
00:41:20.460
She's stuck at home while her ex-husband is parading his new wife on tick tock.
00:41:35.320
As soon as you get the baby from the hospital, he really can't change nappies.
00:41:48.200
And that just continues on and on to the extent that the man does nothing for the child except take Christmas pictures.
00:42:06.540
So what you're going to do is you're going to feed the baby.
00:42:10.920
I should be confident enough to go away for a weekend and know that you're able to take care of your kids.
00:42:17.840
It doesn't matter if you're the dad, the mom, whatever.
00:42:20.640
You should be able to take care of your own kids.
00:42:22.860
Because what's happening is you have these men who barely take care of their kids.
00:42:32.500
But how do you share custody with someone who was not even interested in taking care of the kids while you were in the marriage?
00:42:40.600
Yeah, they get so bitter when you date a younger, hotter woman.
00:42:46.800
But second, a third, a fourth, if he does not know how to independently take care of the child that you currently have.
00:42:56.440
So this idea that men can't, you know, take care of children, it's just false.
00:43:14.540
And why is it that when a woman raises a child, it's a criminal.
00:43:18.600
But when a man raises a child, it's basically the same as two parents.
00:43:22.820
More and more women are actually starting to give their children over to their fathers and put themselves on child support and are going on about their life.
00:43:32.440
Now, before I get into what I'm going to say, I just want to say I am not judging any woman that has decided to do so for whatever reason you made that choice.
00:43:49.120
There's something guys look and I've talked about this.
00:43:54.940
Like I, I leave, like right now, I got like two bottles here.
00:43:59.140
I'm like a water bottle, like empty water bottle, leaving connoisseur.
00:44:07.940
But if you ever asked me, are you good at picking up your water bottle?
00:44:16.860
And some women being a mother, it's just not one of their talents.
00:44:30.680
Now, do I feel like I could be one of those women to stand in that line and do so?
00:44:42.360
Because it's one thing to, now I get it, one night stands and situationships, things happen.
00:44:49.500
But when you're in a relationship with a person and men can just abandon ship, just jump ship
00:44:55.360
mid-pregnancy, or this man changes mid-pregnancy and now this person isn't who you want to be
00:45:02.820
And before y'all get started in my comments, imagine those women who are married and they
00:45:08.640
have three and four and five kids and the man just abandon ship.
00:45:16.520
No, it's a lot of women who are married and they're tired too.
00:45:20.020
It's so many things that can happen that do happen during pregnancy.
00:45:30.960
And then some women get tired of doing it alone.
00:45:41.580
Now, granted, I do have people that I do trust that do help me when I'm really in need and
00:45:52.460
It's no need for me to go through the line of those people.
00:45:54.900
Y'all know who y'all are and I love y'all dearly.
00:46:04.240
A lot of women are just sliding those children onto their fathers and putting themselves on
00:46:27.500
Um, and I want to know if you guys know any women that abandoned their children, maybe your
00:46:33.300
Um, and why do you think that mothers are able to get away with abandoning their kids
00:46:40.600
So, um, a couple rules for calling in first guys.
00:46:46.880
I need you to come on and give me like a, a one minute, two minute story.
00:46:51.480
Then if me and Doug MPA think there's something like entertaining or interesting, we'll keep,
00:46:56.580
we'll keep pressing, but please don't come on and ship.
00:47:01.280
Like if you've invented something or you have something you want to plug, I do appreciate
00:47:06.020
it, but I do want to stick to the topic of the show.
00:47:16.960
And so I prefer the best callers are ones that give their personal experience.
00:47:21.020
I knew this person that did this, or this happened in my life.
00:47:25.420
Um, and then, yeah, if it's interesting, we'll ask more questions.
00:47:28.600
Otherwise, it also depends on how many callers.
00:47:31.160
If we get a lot of callers, sometimes we got to rush them.
00:47:48.960
No, because the double standards is, uh, disgusting.
00:47:54.560
Um, there are women advocating towards leaving their children.
00:47:58.500
And guys, I always say, um, if a woman has a child against your will, all she should,
00:48:06.880
all she should get is a check and keep your veins cold.
00:48:10.880
Cause there's no such thing as you have to do the right thing or letting a woman shame
00:48:19.820
Especially if she's a demon, if she's one of those demons where you have to jump through
00:48:23.420
hoops and she wants to control your life through your kid, you just leave that kid
00:48:27.340
You don't owe that child or her anything and just be ready for when that kid is 14
00:48:34.440
When they come knocking on your door to try to ask you what happened, you say, look, I
00:48:40.660
And I didn't want to be around that woman, but you don't owe these women anything, but
00:48:46.380
But women are celebrated for leaving their kids behind, live your life.
00:48:54.920
And remember, these women choose to have these kids.
00:49:06.120
Uh, I don't, I don't know any women that, uh, that abandoned their children.
00:49:11.960
I guess I don't run in those circles, but yeah, I don't, um, uh, no, I don't.
00:49:18.320
I was telling you earlier, I knew one, well, I didn't know her, but I knew the son of one.
00:49:22.960
And yeah, it was basically, she abandoned, um, the family for years and like left the kids
00:49:34.260
So he was like, the dad was like in a wheelchair.
00:49:43.380
And then, uh, when I was going to community college and him and I were good friends.
00:49:48.160
And then he left all of his friends behind to, to be with this woman that we all couldn't
00:49:55.760
And, um, it was one of those situations where he was a professional and she was a stay at
00:50:02.100
home mom, but she was into that multi-level marketing stuff.
00:50:05.680
Oh no, she left it to do multi-level marketing.
00:50:11.080
So their whole marriage, he'd have to say, oh yeah, helping my wife with, with her business.
00:50:16.780
And she's such a business owner doing all this multi-level marketing stuff.
00:50:20.140
Well, she reconnect cause she was from Colorado.
00:50:24.580
She reckoned she reconnected with a high school friend and she left him to move to Colorado and
00:50:41.500
Like, was it kind of, was he kind of like, I don't want to, I don't want to say it, but
00:50:46.140
if she's crazy enough to do that, she was probably tormenting him, you know?
00:50:49.940
So was he like kind of relieved in a way or no?
00:50:55.920
Because he, he married a single mother, like right after, right after he married a single
00:51:04.260
I think he was single for like a year, a year and a half.
00:51:06.480
And then he got married again to some single mom.
00:51:09.380
Um, so I, I don't even, you know, I mean, he's making it, but I don't know.
00:51:20.640
Well, do you think that men, I, not that they like men can do what they want, but would
00:51:26.720
you recommend a guy, could he, would you be, would you still say a guy not mess with a
00:51:36.800
I think that people with children should date each other and leave the people that don't
00:51:44.640
So yeah, I would say if you're a guy with kids, date a woman with kids that you both
00:51:49.080
have skin in the game, but leave the childless people alone.
00:51:52.820
Cause I don't date guys, don't do single mothers.
00:52:22.820
Uh, it just says zoom user going once zoom user going twice.
00:52:30.360
I'm going to put you in the waiting room and come back to you.
00:52:36.520
Carlos guys, make sure to like the video subscribe.
00:52:39.460
If you haven't already, we're on our way to 3 million.
00:52:42.300
Thanks for everyone for getting us to 2 million.
00:52:45.720
Thank you for everyone in the audacity chat and thank you to all the regulars on YouTube.
00:53:07.560
So tell me, um, you're, you were in this exact situation, weren't you?
00:53:14.300
Uh, it's, uh, and I told you the last, I called a couple of weeks ago and I told you like being
00:53:22.460
Um, but yeah, that abandonment thing, you know, when I was in court, I use that word and the
00:53:29.760
judge, I got mad at me cause I use the word abandonment and he's like, well, we're not
00:53:39.240
And she left, she wouldn't come home so I can go to work so I can revive from my kids
00:53:46.100
And she threatened me with contempt of court and threatened me to put me in jail.
00:53:49.320
Cause I kept on talking about abandonment and a woman or a man.
00:54:04.360
I didn't, uh, I had to find childcare for all my kids.
00:54:12.020
And then the job where I got fired from where they, they let me go, but they, they knew the
00:54:18.300
So once I found childcare, they told me if you can find that you can come back.
00:54:22.540
So I got everything back that I had before right now.
00:54:36.600
Cause they're like, um, uh, how, what's that say where these women question how single fathers
00:54:47.180
would be able to take care of their children while they're working or something like that?
00:54:50.740
They're like, I don't know how men would be able to do it.
00:54:56.560
So what would you say to a woman that would try to say that single fathers work and they're
00:55:05.040
Uh, they underestimate us like even in court, like the judge had the same, cause I mean,
00:55:11.640
I wanted to change my judge and family court, but I was like, no, like I just, I want her
00:55:19.460
And you know, my ex-wife got arrested for methamphetamine.
00:55:23.780
She got arrested for three DUIs and all this stuff.
00:55:27.440
So now that I still have the same judge, she sees the full picture now.
00:55:31.240
She knows that I'm not like, I'm the capable parent.
00:55:37.160
And, and, and she, uh, you know, she tries to praise me that you're the kids rock and all
00:55:43.940
And I told, I told the judge, I was like, look, I don't need praise.
00:55:53.200
I don't need validation for doing what I'm supposed to be doing.
00:55:58.120
Do you have any guy friends that, um, had to like fight for custody of their kids?
00:56:04.560
I know some people it's just that, um, they didn't fight hard enough.
00:56:11.700
Like, I mean, with my whole case, I didn't hire a lawyer.
00:56:15.700
I looked up the laws, um, and most, and in all states for any single fathers out there,
00:56:21.980
if you're about to go through a divorce or anything like that, in all states, there's
00:56:33.460
And try to avoid talking bad about it by the other parent, but he had to try to show
00:56:40.100
If he's going out and partying and drinking and stuff like that, and someone's babysitting
00:56:49.200
I was just wondering if you prefer this than like going through the court process of like
00:56:55.800
fighting for your, cause Wednesday I'm doing a show on like the pros.
00:56:59.040
It's like, it's almost better to get pregnant a woman.
00:57:02.460
That's so crazy that you get custody rather than like going to court for 18 years.
00:57:07.140
I was just wondering if you'd agree with that or not.
00:57:11.960
I mean, I wouldn't be with that kind of woman in the first place.
00:57:16.160
My ex-wife had, I mean, I mean, when I met my ex-wife, I was six years older than her.
00:57:22.240
So, I mean, she went through some traumatizing stuff and at that time and not knowing about
00:57:26.780
mental health and how it really affects people if they don't address it, especially women.
00:57:31.540
Um, you know, I had to, I felt bad for her and it was like, you want to come for her.
00:57:41.620
I mean, and I seen in our marriage, like, I mean, there was things in our marriage, like
00:57:44.560
she constantly accused me of looking at other women and wanting to sleep with other women.
00:57:49.280
And I just didn't want to, like, I had a very beautiful ex-wife.
00:58:02.560
And I did therapy for about six months and, you know, was brutally honest with therapists.
00:58:08.360
And she was like, well, it seems like that she had childhood trauma.
00:58:13.280
I mean, she went through some stuff that no child should go through.
00:58:16.240
And now that I know that I could teach my sons to look for that in a woman and teach my daughters,
00:58:23.820
like, use their mom as an example for my daughters.
00:58:35.280
Um, or why don't you think society comes down with the same visceral on single mothers that
00:58:42.060
abandon their families than, um, single that they do to single fathers?
00:58:51.360
I just, I think, I just, I know like fathers, and this is the crazy thing about single mothers
00:58:58.680
abandoning their children and just look at it like this and it's going to sound crazy,
00:59:02.080
but ant, like animals and the animal kingdom, mama bears, lions, like they don't, they take care of the children.
00:59:15.300
They don't have a conscience, but human beings, human women have consciences.
00:59:18.780
So when they do something like that, there's something severely wrong.
00:59:29.980
Um, and here's the thing, this whole feminism thing, the social media is going to show us that
00:59:40.700
this myth that women are nurturers, that women are just morally superior because the women is
00:59:46.740
a lie because we're going to have more women abusing positions of power, abusing the elderly,
00:59:56.480
It's going to take a little bit, but women, they're going to show the true colors as they
01:00:04.940
And you know, all you can do is minimize the damage.
01:00:11.580
I mean, you have school teachers, women, sexually abusing kids.
01:00:19.800
There was a weekend last year where six teachers in one weekend all got arrested for sleeping
01:00:26.580
And also there is enough of these happening where Pearl, did you know that if a teacher
01:00:33.220
sleeps with a minor young boy and gets pregnant and has his kid, his parents will have to pay
01:00:50.440
Sweet aunt T says, because women get all the privileges without their responsibilities and
01:00:55.120
men get all the responsibilities without the privilege.
01:00:58.080
Thank you, sweet aunt T. You might be one of my only female viewers.
01:01:05.060
I'm trying to have her call in because she said that she, she left her single mother
01:01:11.500
All right, Carlos, we're going to move on to the next caller.
01:01:17.900
Every time he calls in, it's a good call every single time.
01:01:26.720
And I want to, I want to tell you guys why he stopped.
01:01:30.360
He checks in to make sure he doesn't drone on and it's not to be rude to you guys that
01:01:35.820
I'm sure I've done it at times too, but we want to increase the quality of the show.
01:01:56.580
What a name is that your real name or a screen name?
01:02:07.300
I'm actually from North Carolina, but I actually live in Minnesota right now.
01:02:12.000
I hear a little accent from the South, but I'll try to cliff note it real quick about the
01:02:28.420
Um, she, we were both having real bad problems.
01:02:36.840
Um, she told me like before I deployed that she was going to cheat on me, that, that, um,
01:02:46.480
she didn't want to be a part of my life no more.
01:02:51.600
And that she was going to make sure that I'd never got to see my kid again.
01:02:55.580
And so I said, all right, we're going to go to court.
01:03:00.560
She called my command, got me kicked out of the house.
01:03:03.740
Um, uh, I deployed, we were at Washington at the time and she moved back to North Carolina.
01:03:09.700
Um, my sister has actually played a huge part of it where she, my sister played as kind of
01:03:19.220
Um, my ex would kind of like, um, drop off my son with my sister and it started out with
01:03:30.220
Then it turned into weeks and then months towards the end.
01:03:37.040
And my sister called the police, got an abandonment on her.
01:03:41.220
And, um, I went to the court, took it to the court and the court actually made me sit in the
01:03:48.980
I had to come in every day at 9am when the court opened until it closed every day just to see if
01:03:56.540
And she didn't, but they made me wait two weeks and my command did not like that.
01:04:02.560
But I got back, like it was 2014 when I got back and that's, yeah.
01:04:13.300
At the time, at the start, it was like half a year.
01:04:24.160
Like I got court orders of getting granted full custody and she got a restraining order.
01:04:31.340
And so I was like, I don't know who's going to deliver it.
01:04:33.860
So I did it because I had to go back to North Carolina to pick up my son because my sister
01:04:39.340
And so I gave it to her and never heard from her since.
01:04:53.160
Like, there's nothing like I, I would, there's nothing she can do.
01:05:00.920
Because the kid, your, is it a daughter or son?
01:05:11.160
And she's been gone the whole, I'm telling you, women are just heartless, man.
01:05:16.700
Like, was she on drugs or like, so the thing was, is that every time, like I would like
01:05:26.600
I would say I spent more time in the field than I ever did at home, whether it was deployment
01:05:34.260
Like we would literally go out for a month, come back for a week, go out for another month.
01:05:39.100
And each time when I went on these like field problems, she would just text me either.
01:05:43.860
Like she's taking these pills while she's pregnant, taking these pills or just alcohol.
01:05:48.640
Like she would send me a bunch of pictures of that kind of stuff.
01:05:55.460
Like I'm sitting in, like, like I said, I was stationed in Washington.
01:05:58.540
I would be all the way in Louisiana or I would be in California and there's just nothing I
01:06:06.460
Has it affected your career a lot or what did you end up doing?
01:06:10.720
So what's crazy is that because going through her, she took a lot.
01:06:15.020
Like we literally, like I decided to get out of the military so that way I could raise my
01:06:20.720
And we started out pretty much living in the car.
01:06:34.940
And like now I'm a production manager and I'm closing on the house here soon.
01:06:41.560
And so what do you, when you hear women say that being a mother is the most difficult job
01:06:51.380
It's not hard if you know how to discipline a child.
01:06:53.860
If you just, if you just let them go off and do whatever they want to do.
01:06:57.840
No, because I like, to me, I believe that part of parenting is fear, but not fear where
01:07:04.060
like they're scared of everything you do, but it's, it's respect.
01:07:08.200
And like, I get, I feel like at a certain age, children are not going to respect the
01:07:13.760
parent that's just always lenient and doesn't seem to really care.
01:07:17.760
Cause it's like, I see a lot of women, like I have, like I've dated one single mother and
01:07:25.000
Never gone with a single mother because I just seen how like the child became and it's
01:07:30.700
And could you imagine if it were a woman, a child from a single mother who is raised by
01:07:39.920
a single mother and in the same household as your child, who, who was raised by you and
01:07:44.180
who, who's well disciplined, it would be chaos.
01:07:58.400
And I'm telling you, I just don't be surprised if she doesn't try to swoop in right around
01:08:03.820
high school graduation and be like, I'm ready to have a relationship and blah, blah, blah.
01:08:15.940
Well, that's the thing though, is I have told my son who she is.
01:08:20.180
Like not, I've never been the type of person where it's just like, I'm going to tell you
01:08:23.960
I said all the good things about her, who she was and all that.
01:08:27.620
And it's like, I even told him that if, if he ever wanted to meet her, I'll do every
01:08:34.860
See, that's what I was telling you earlier, Doug MPA men just like, they'll never, um,
01:08:42.060
women can do so much wrong and they'll still try to like facilitate a relationship.
01:08:48.240
Well, they say only 10% of men put their baby's mother on child support.
01:08:57.220
It's like less than 10% of men that could actually do.
01:09:02.760
So part of going through the divorce was they did the child support thing.
01:09:10.400
I never got any of it, but when we were going through the hard times, I needed to get healthcare
01:09:15.200
for my kid part of going to get the Medicaid or Medicare, whatever it is, you have to
01:09:27.780
So they did the child support thing, agreed to the $70 because I was in the court order
01:09:35.980
And what's funny is that the, the child support enforcement officer, it was a female.
01:09:42.420
She told me like, this is common that they'd never find a woman.
01:09:46.820
Like she told me like, there's many, many cases where they just never find the female,
01:09:52.720
especially if they're young and they're decent looking, they can just hide.
01:09:57.000
They just find a man and the man will take care of them.
01:09:59.320
And they usually don't find them unless like, it's like 10 to 15 years later when their looks
01:10:05.540
And they can't, and they can't find a guy to take care of them anymore.
01:10:10.600
And that was, this is coming from a female support officer.
01:10:15.760
And so they just, after a year of them supposedly looking, they just closed the case and never
01:10:24.020
Do you, is it more lenient from like, um, I'm assuming when it's a woman, they don't
01:10:29.760
Like, like, do they do the same thing if it's a man in another state or something?
01:10:37.720
Um, I, I, I just know that North Carolina, especially being like a military town too.
01:10:46.200
It's, they're very, very strong when it comes to child support.
01:10:49.160
Like you give them any idea, they'll do everything they can to get it.
01:10:56.240
They don't send it all to the child, but them just giving up and just whatever, I guess it's
01:11:01.580
like with women, either they're lenient or she was able to hide very well.
01:11:09.380
I wouldn't say thank you for your service, man.
01:11:12.740
And honestly, the best thing you did was get custody of your son, man.
01:11:18.060
Seriously, cause we need more sons raised by their fathers.
01:11:23.640
And the best part about it is, you know, he, he, he knows what's going on.
01:11:31.380
Thank you for your service and calling anytime, buddy.
01:11:40.100
Oh, Dustin says the reason for women getting, um, the reason for women getting away with it
01:11:54.680
You guys get unlimited super chats on the website.
01:12:01.120
I always do my best to give my all to my husband.
01:12:28.700
I don't even know how to rename the damn thing.
01:12:48.860
So what's your story with a woman abandoning her child?
01:12:58.160
And this girl was like beautiful, talented, smart, had like a promising like career.
01:13:05.880
Um, but she was kind of like two timing me and this other guy, right?
01:13:19.680
So she was literally flying between, uh, Australia and New Zealand because I was doing something in New Zealand.
01:13:26.720
And then the other fellow was doing something in Australia and I didn't know for a while, but like, uh, I finally found out when like I called her and she was in the car with her, um, other, uh, cast mates, let's call it.
01:13:45.240
And for the first time she didn't say, I love you in reply.
01:13:51.780
And I'm like hearing these people in the background.
01:13:55.140
And I put two and two together and I figured out, you know, what was happening.
01:13:58.220
But here's what happened is we break up, they, um, get engaged and then she gets pregnant.
01:14:10.940
And, um, she had a lot of trauma, you know, like childhood trauma.
01:14:17.780
Uh, she lost her dad when she was young and, uh, she, I just could tell like she did not want to grow up, you know, I think she thought this family lifestyle might be good, you know, but once the kid came along, I think, uh, her trauma turned into addictions and drug addictions and alcohol addictions.
01:14:45.380
I thought it was going to be something, but keep going.
01:14:50.120
So, um, it got to the point where he goes, had to, you know, I don't know whether she wasn't paying her child support or, or whatever or something, but, um, uh, they, they'd separated for, I don't know how long.
01:15:03.820
And then he, he ended up coming into the hospital where she was, maybe she had overdosed or something.
01:15:09.380
I don't know, but he got her to sign the papers in her hospital bed.
01:15:14.660
And, um, I think now he has full custody and I, I hate to say it, but I think it's for the best.
01:15:23.040
You know, like, why would you hate to say that?
01:15:25.580
Um, you don't have to give qualifiers around here, man.
01:15:32.660
I, I still, I still feel for her because, uh, she's an amazing person.
01:15:45.780
Out of all the girls I've dated, um, that was like one that I thought she could have been the one, you know, but.
01:15:55.120
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
01:15:57.120
you thought that a two-timing skeezer was gonna be the one okay get this though this will this
01:16:06.340
will make you even think i'm even more of a sim yeah so like 10 years go by and um i'm living in
01:16:14.300
la and then i'm like uh i decided to move back to australia and um we started talking i don't know
01:16:22.660
how but we just started talking and she was like oh well i want you to come home i miss you i i just
01:16:28.580
need you to come like basically come save me talk no did you do it well i had been i'd been back in
01:16:36.860
australia less than three days she was down in sydney that's another state and she's like come
01:16:44.500
here right now i need you right now just get on a freaking plane and you went didn't you hang on
01:16:50.200
hang on totally went i went with the intention just to help this person oh my god that was not
01:16:57.060
your intention how how was the sex was it good how was the sex was it good
01:17:04.120
did she give me that i need my phone bills and rent paid sex did she give you that kind of sex
01:17:15.120
uh she was like yes i can't i don't want to get into that i'm a gentleman all right
01:17:21.800
but um i i was going to at least like see if i could just help this person
01:17:29.680
start with i was gonna start with that and i was clear i was like look we ain't jumping into anything
01:17:33.820
i'm still pretty messed up or like hurt by what you did are you on twitter can you send me a picture
01:17:39.800
what she looks like i just want to see i need to like i won't share it with the chat but i just
01:17:45.600
i want to see how like she had to be so beautiful she was she was gorgeous um she was like a star here
01:17:54.660
in the country um picture like uh a 22 year old scarlett johansson um because she was south african too
01:18:02.400
yeah um you were done just just just gorgeous you know like beautiful okay like a nine nine and a
01:18:11.140
half you know okay with talent like really so 10 years later if when you knew her younger as a nine
01:18:21.100
nine and a half 10 years later in a kid what was her rating uh now it was a seven and a half
01:18:32.180
um i don't know why but a lot of these women she had really good boobs didn't she i just know it
01:18:40.060
she used to have great perky little like uh nice tits and then she did what all the girls do here
01:18:47.140
was she got she got a tip job she didn't even need it you know because that's what's good about kind
01:18:51.960
of tits that aren't too big to begin with as they all they don't get a little super saggy you can get
01:18:57.360
you know 35 year old with some nice little perky tits but i don't know and she had the lips done
01:19:03.480
they all they all get the lips done yeah so anyway so you went to go help her out you banged a little
01:19:13.240
bit but what ended up happening yeah so i was actually like all right we ain't doing that because
01:19:18.340
we ain't crossing that line because i don't know how i feel about you just yet
01:19:21.560
but um and then something else happened i was like i i went back up i stayed there for like a
01:19:27.500
night and then i came home and her daughter and uh baby daddy were here like literally like
01:19:34.420
down the road okay and i was like hey i saw your daughter and she's like um oh yeah she's she's with
01:19:43.260
uh her uh grandmother or something right i'm like oh man you should um you should come and just hang
01:19:49.780
out you know so i invited her to come stay here and then she managed to get like four or five days
01:19:56.240
uh with her daughter and i was thinking okay i'm gonna meet this girl i'm just gonna see that dude
01:20:05.000
in her and i'm just gonna be like oh this is too much i can't do this but get this man when i met
01:20:10.360
this girl like this little i don't know she would have been seven seven years old or something
01:20:15.100
she was such an innocent sweet sweet little person that i just melted instantly i kind of
01:20:21.960
forgot all about it i was like damn it like and maybe because you know i've been like clucky lately
01:20:28.280
or whatever the male term for cluckiness is um i kind of liked having this little family scenario
01:20:35.080
just in my house just watching them do like mother daughter stuff you know and me and the daughter
01:20:40.020
got along so well and i was like oh man what is going on here but um what actually ended it was
01:20:46.140
like i said to her i was like i don't want to have sex with you until i know that maybe we're gonna
01:20:54.640
try again and i don't know if i want to do that so once she heard that there was no sex on offer
01:21:00.580
yeah so that's that yeah someone in the chat said were you the simp it sounds like it do you think
01:21:11.740
you simped in this situation uh no if i was to simp i would have just taken her on board
01:21:19.320
okay i would have taken her back i would have um enjoyed all the great sex but um i gave her no d
01:21:26.960
she got no dick oh so you didn't even hook up second time around you just hung out with the
01:21:31.720
daughter yeah i think i let her blow me in the steam room uh okay but um yeah no i was like and
01:21:41.540
i didn't want to be like rooting when her daughter was always in the next room and stuff like she was
01:21:46.260
like i'll come sneak into the room in the middle of the night i'm like no don't do that come on
01:21:50.300
look over here i don't care how you dodge the bullet i don't i don't care how you dodge a bullet
01:21:57.400
as long as you dodge it bro and here's the thing she came back up back around 10 years later she saw
01:22:03.020
you you're doing better she's doing worse that's the ultimate revenge just do better man yeah but
01:22:11.280
anyway so moral of the story is i think uh in this scenario um the kid is better off with uh just
01:22:18.160
the dad yeah it seems like it clue studio says i love the movie trailer good to see you at two
01:22:25.080
million subs and monetize i'm proud of you thank you clue studio zachary g says were thank you
01:22:31.380
doug mp you got any other questions for him you dodged a bullet do you have any kids or no
01:22:38.660
no i would love kids but uh i haven't met the one yet well if you don't you don't have any kids so
01:22:46.080
stay away from single moms man you you're better than that stay away from mom all right buddy all
01:22:53.000
right just correct call it anytime buddy always good talking to you great thanks for having me guys
01:22:58.080
what a great call that was great that was hilarious see guys these are awesome calls
01:23:06.880
these are all we're totally fine with it going longer but you it we we have to be asking the
01:23:14.380
questions not a monologue you know so these are awesome they guys are awesome because when you give
01:23:21.420
suggestions to matt like when kevin samuels had callers that were women they would just do whatever
01:23:27.000
they wanted but like the guys if you tell them please do this when you call in look at that that was an
01:23:33.920
amazing great three callers we had uh dude's a total chad so that girl he's talking about was
01:23:42.580
probably as gorgeous as he said she was especially you know if he was an actor and and she's an actor i
01:23:49.860
guarantee you she was probably just drop dead gorgeous and i'm sorry guys there's a certain level
01:23:54.600
of hot that if you're under a certain age you just get drunk off the hotness dude that's why
01:24:00.700
some of the most beautiful the most beautiful women are the worst in bed you want to know why
01:24:08.380
oh my gosh i've heard that from okay keep going keep going i've heard that you've heard from i've
01:24:14.960
heard that from three different guys that like the the word like that the best sex they've ever
01:24:22.260
um like the hottest girl they've ever been with was like some of the worst sex they ever had
01:24:26.640
i could tell you why it's because the um a lot of mids or nerdy women they
01:24:34.780
they know that they're not going to just get by on their looks so they have to like research their
01:24:42.060
sex game and and they have to satisfy their man with their sex game because they don't have it in
01:24:47.400
the looks department some of those beautiful women the guys that sleep with them are so enamored
01:24:52.820
with their looks that they don't have the conversation with them saying you suck in bed
01:24:57.240
that's why they're so terrible yeah yeah um next up we have drew yes drew how's it going
01:25:14.320
how's it going how are you i'm good where are you calling out of i hear i'm gonna guess south
01:25:21.180
yep middle tennessee nice okay um but uh so i gotta got some good stories for you all right let's hear
01:25:30.180
them but uh my first child at 19 with a kind of high school sweetheart uh became an iron at 20 moved
01:25:37.700
to middle tennessee here um i started working at 21 full time as a nurse we had her second child at
01:25:45.140
uh a couple years later when i was 23 but uh things won't after after that kind of just uh
01:25:53.220
went crazy for her she started doing drugs and basically having sex with a guy i was playing golf
01:25:59.640
with so let's just say that changed things real quick what drugs was she on
01:26:04.920
well probably just anything and everything like crap like two years later i ended up getting full
01:26:12.240
custody of him because of everything though so but uh was it a son or a daughter i have two daughters
01:26:19.840
two daughters and we're how old was the youngest when you got custody uh two my oldest was six okay
01:26:26.340
and when did she go off the deep end like around what age she was probably 21 to 22 and i don't know
01:26:32.740
if it's really uh sorry i meant of the kids like how old were the kids when she started to go off the
01:26:37.660
deep end she was a one and one and four okay so i was just curious if she did drugs during the
01:26:44.380
pregnancies at all or if they were like no nothing like that i always kind of thought it was a uh the
01:26:50.780
the postnatal or you know the baby blues afterwards so but uh just never came back from that
01:26:58.160
i was curious if was there any character traits that you identified like in hindsight that maybe
01:27:06.060
you could have saw this coming or would you just say there was no way well i hate to say it i just
01:27:10.760
we kind of grew up in appalachia so it was kind of the uh i can't take the trailer trash out of the uh
01:27:15.720
the trailer girl that makes sense she just so wanted to go back i think to that that kind of lifestyle
01:27:21.620
which i kind of took us away from to you know have a better life basically okay but uh when i
01:27:29.620
went to court and stuff uh basically started all this my youngest my oldest one she was five at the
01:27:34.220
time called and said the guys they were with threw her against the wall so that's what kind of got
01:27:39.700
everything started for me to go to court and get a lawyer and um basically you know start fighting
01:27:46.400
you know get some stuff on paper and get them full time but uh with that being said when i did go to
01:27:51.560
court with everything that she was doing just drugs and craziness getting arrested and moving the kids
01:27:57.200
around from house to house and school to school it didn't take much to actually get full custody of
01:28:01.560
them wow so how many times did you have to go to court to get custody well it was the same like you
01:28:10.560
know it was only one time basically you know but yeah i go for like the free trial and
01:28:15.320
do a trial here and there but her parents were on my side her mom actually moved in with me after
01:28:20.900
all this to help me raise them um because where i was just working uh 12 hour shifts and needing
01:28:27.000
somebody to kind of be home so her mom did step up and you know kind of fulfill the motherly role but
01:28:32.540
sadly that was the third generation that she had to raise and did the daughter like fight like did she
01:28:39.580
or did she kind of throw her hands up and say she didn't want them anyway well they uh she didn't get any
01:28:44.860
type of lawyer and you know she came to the court and basically saying you know i'm a good mom and
01:28:49.240
you know you know all this is lies but there's just so many people saying you know that they've
01:28:54.060
seen it and the police reports out there you know there's no way that could happen but after i got
01:28:58.520
full custody even 15 years later now she's never tried to come back and you know probably seen my
01:29:03.980
oldest one uh maybe 30 days in the last 15 years then my youngest one she's probably seen her
01:29:08.960
for like 90 days of the last 15. and what what do you say to mothers um that say being a mother is
01:29:16.800
the hardest job on the planet do you agree well i think half the battle just with any parenting is
01:29:22.500
just showing up if you can show up and you know put a smile on the kid's face and you know just don't
01:29:28.540
do don't don't try to do harm and try to try to make things better you know it's not that it's not
01:29:32.800
rocket science but showing up is half the battle okay um what i'm trying to figure out a way to ask
01:29:43.460
this question do you think that you've had an easier time than someone that had to like go back
01:29:50.300
in court uh for years like someone like whose wife maybe had money and like could fight or like
01:29:56.740
like like people that have done 50 50 just anecdotally what you've seen go ahead if you
01:30:04.120
got two parents are doing good you know i mean there's no reason not to have two parents uh you
01:30:08.820
know as long as everybody's on the same page and that type of deal but if uh you don't have one being
01:30:12.980
a hindrance or destroying lives or you know that type of thing just it's kind of like anything else
01:30:17.960
you don't want them in your life yeah you know i hate to say uh you know uh there's just these kids
01:30:25.000
had a better life than they would have with her being involved at all yeah doug mpa you got any
01:30:31.400
other questions for him i don't cool well thanks for calling in i'm calling anytime okay that was great
01:30:44.760
hold on is he about to bring it back in okay hold on hold on one second that's about too quick
01:30:50.680
hey dude what were you saying i accidentally dropped you out oh no i'm just saying uh i'll
01:30:55.560
just tell her i appreciate uh what she does for women and everybody else in the community that we're
01:31:00.200
in so cool well thanks for watching i really appreciate it thanks for calling in
01:31:21.320
j j y j y j there j going once j going twice j going three times i'm gonna put you in the waiting
01:31:32.360
room and i'll bring you back in after the next i want to see how good i can get at guessing where
01:31:37.080
people are from cool well you've been doing a good job so far yeah okay brando uh hi i'm here can
01:31:47.560
you hear me i can hear you hey brando how are you hi wow what a trip i'm good that's crazy to talk
01:31:56.440
to you i'm gonna mute myself here i got you on another device cool we're okay wait let me guess
01:32:02.040
i'm gonna guess you're either west coast or midwest i'm gonna say west coast that's funny
01:32:07.880
uh actually south carolina i spent five years in maryland but uh mostly south carolina i grew up myrtle
01:32:13.560
beach most of my life i do not hear the southern accent it's not too strong with you it's a weird one
01:32:20.680
um but i'm a i'm a single father i've been a father my daughter she's seven um man i'll tell you
01:32:28.120
i went through a whole ride i didn't know what narcissism was and gaslighting and stuff was
01:32:32.760
beforehand um so i'll start from the beginning my so i'm 32 um my mom's a nurse my dad was a police
01:32:42.040
officer they never did drugs or drank or anything and so my i had a really good childhood growing up
01:32:48.520
um and it was very straight laced uh i have a brittle bone disease i've broken about 140 bones
01:32:56.600
uh in my life i got spinal fusion from neck to waist um and uh so when i found out i i met my
01:33:07.720
child's mother on the internet through a site it was called earth we are one you know i was going
01:33:12.360
through a hippie phase hey you know you get the spirituality thing and you go down those holes and
01:33:19.480
and you meet these chicks and they promise you the world and you're like oh all right i'll start a
01:33:24.200
family with this white picket fence dream you know and and uh i went down that road wasn't long before
01:33:30.760
i found out you know there was some some odd behavior and and how she was and then you start
01:33:36.120
finding out how she grew up her parents weren't like mine you know they were abusive and they did
01:33:40.840
drugs and drank and she did you know she used to cut herself and she used to do pills and she
01:33:46.840
had was very promiscuous with the neighbor boy down the street and man so the total opposite of
01:33:53.800
and of of what i was used to and uh so i was like yeah we live 500 miles apart she's she lives up north
01:34:00.520
in an eye and i'm in south carolina and i meet her i'm on the internet and i say hey all right well come
01:34:05.240
on down here i'll save you save your complex you know and i'm like i'll take care of you just come to
01:34:10.120
me i got a job i got cars she didn't have a driver's license she didn't have any money she was
01:34:14.440
scrounging uh cans out of her cabinets um sorry it's a wild story uh okay so um so what happened
01:34:28.600
when did she like when how long till you guys had the kid and like when did she leave
01:34:34.200
so i moved her down with me we lived in an rv and uh we we were together for about a year and then
01:34:41.240
we were kind of realizing things weren't weren't gelling and so i i took her back i was going to
01:34:46.920
take her back to ohio and on the final day as like a final goodbye we had sex one last time and that's
01:34:52.600
when uh she got pregnant and uh i found out i keep telling you that closure stuff man bro i told you
01:35:01.320
about this yeah and i and a few weeks later i found out and um you know this is where you make the
01:35:08.120
decision as a man you know this is what makes you know the boys into men whether you you turn and run
01:35:12.920
or you you face your choices and um i've i doubled down so i i've we were gonna break up and i said look
01:35:19.640
we're gonna have a kid uh i'm i'm i'll double down here i moved to ohio i moved my whole life up there
01:35:26.040
um rented an apartment for us got us all ready you know we had the child up there um and then i bought
01:35:33.160
us a house to in south carolina about a year later and um then we moved down to south carolina lived
01:35:39.640
there for a few years and then i got a job and remind you i got all the the broken bones and the
01:35:45.080
rods my back stuff and so i get the job because she refused to work um she wanted to do the stay
01:35:51.080
home mom thing i got that and after you know the second year in like all right well somebody's got to
01:35:57.400
pick up the bills i i i gotta go back to work i can't afford you know our lifestyle and disability
01:36:03.800
dot us anyway so the stress builds you know and then but the the then the narcissist she starts
01:36:09.960
calling me a narcissist and i don't know what this is and she starts you know accusing me of these
01:36:15.400
things and then i i didn't you know it all blows up you know a year a year later it all blows up um
01:36:21.800
she tries to flee the state with the child um and go to live with her parents her parents are
01:36:26.920
going to divorce and you know they're all still doing drugs i'm trying to save the child at this
01:36:31.080
point so i do emergency custody is it like the six months old dish uh should be two she was just
01:36:37.400
turning two at this point and so i petitioned for emergency custody with the court you know and based
01:36:43.400
on all the evidence it was very clear that the father had the stable situation for the child the
01:36:48.840
mother was basically camping in a tent at that point because she had she was talking about staying
01:36:54.120
in a shelter and this was right when covid was kicking off and she's talking about staying in
01:36:58.520
a shelter child so it was it was easy choice for the judge you know with the father and and it stayed
01:37:03.080
like this well so now you know fast forward it's been five years she's seen the child maybe she's
01:37:09.080
come to see her three times in five years and she hasn't paid a dime in child support i've i didn't
01:37:14.840
i didn't twist the knife in court to ask for it i just cared about the child's safety you know and um so
01:37:20.520
i didn't ask for child support and i had and i've asked for it now but i haven't forced it it's just
01:37:26.040
it's like do the right thing you know and so they all come into the title your your thing here women
01:37:32.200
who abandon their children you know she says she would disagree but you know i would if if i was in
01:37:38.520
her shoes i would move down the street you couldn't keep me for my child there's no way i would move and
01:37:45.400
she refuses to move down here or you know and and now she's got a job and she's you know not
01:37:52.280
contributing anything and she she calls when she wants to and then and the other thing all right so
01:37:58.120
when she calls she never asks never asks how the child's doing it's always to tell us about her and
01:38:04.760
what she's doing in her life and anyway i i i'll stop so i have a question so you you said that when you
01:38:12.200
found out that there was going to be a baby it was the time where you find out who the boys are
01:38:19.000
and who the men are so you stepped up to the plate knowing what you know now do you think that that was
01:38:23.720
the right decision yes yes and um uh you know i wouldn't run i wouldn't i take responsibility that's
01:38:32.360
how i was raised you know i got her pregnant i nobody else did it i did it um and i'm gonna be the
01:38:38.760
father no matter what and so i doubled down for this child i dedicated to this child no matter what
01:38:45.080
happens what do you think when women say that being a mother is the most difficult job in the
01:38:50.200
world do you think that's true and that's why i told you the background about the broken bones
01:38:55.800
and the spinal fusion if i can do this anybody can do it anybody can do it and i'm still the funniest
01:39:03.960
day we should do a clip with just all of their answers today cool all right anyway um um so do you
01:39:15.240
um said the kid's six now she's seven and she's got the bone disease too she's broken her leg three
01:39:22.520
times um and uh she's been in the wheelchair her first first week of first grade she broke her leg at
01:39:29.800
recess and uh you know her mother never came down for any of that you know never even asked how how
01:39:36.280
she healed in the end and um you know but i'm involved with the school and all that and you know i
01:39:45.560
it's it's it's wild she's such a beautiful girl i don't know how you couldn't want to be around
01:39:51.720
around her and yeah well didn't it come you dig into the psychology thing and i'm man of all the
01:39:56.440
youtube diving of all the videos and talk about narcissistic abuse and the reactionary abuse was
01:40:01.720
an interesting one because she tried to pin me as the abuser because i'd yell you know i'd go on
01:40:06.360
these yelling tangents but it's because of the you know i'd ask her please i come home and the
01:40:13.400
kitchens are wrecked dishes she's outside child sitting in front of the tv if she wanted to be back
01:40:18.840
in the kid's life would you allow it no i beg for it i i beg for it but in one capacity problem because
01:40:28.600
with the psychological issues yeah she's not safe so right now the the custody agreement was i've got
01:40:35.800
full custody but she can have visited supervised visitation every other weekend um and and she hasn't
01:40:44.680
taken any of those up but it's the supervised part and it's because she's the and i boy i wish we could
01:40:50.520
sit her in front of us you know a psychologist or something you know i don't know how that works but
01:40:55.720
because there needs to be an evaluation with and there's all i see it with a lot of these females and
01:41:00.280
i think it's this whole culture of today and what you guys talk about and why i draw i'm drawn to your
01:41:05.000
channel and um well cool well thank you so much for calling in thank you so much for listening
01:41:14.200
doug mpa you got any other questions for him i don't you know just keep being there for your
01:41:19.560
daughter man yeah and and i encourage all you fathers just you know stand strong for your kids
01:41:24.680
no matter what we gotta we gotta turn this culture around you know and and raise these kids right and
01:41:29.800
and fix fix this world man yeah good good sanity back on track thank you so much bye
01:41:39.800
doug and pierre are you gonna fix this world no man i i'm gonna stick to what i always say guys
01:41:46.680
your veins cold if a woman has a child against you your will all they're gonna get is a check
01:41:51.800
that's it like this whole men haven't do the right thing that we used to try to do the right thing but
01:41:58.200
women call that patriarchy so if women are gonna look out for themselves you need to look out for
01:42:05.080
yourself i'm telling you there's no such thing as doing the right thing anymore we tried that it
01:42:11.160
as men and women hated us for it all right we're gonna bring up sweet auntie t
01:42:17.800
sweet aunt auntie t yeah yeah hello can you hear me i can hear you fine like say one more thing i want
01:42:28.520
to guess the accent should i throw it on real thick i'm not hearing are you midwest oh gosh darn you know
01:42:37.800
i mean teeter tot hot dish in a tri-county area wait wisconsin no way north dakota let's go
01:42:52.040
um so what's your experience with um women that abandon their kids do you know any or or or you can
01:42:59.400
ask pearl a general question too yeah so mine's a little flip floppy but um so i was raised by a
01:43:06.680
single mom who uh just lived her life like she was had no kids so i kind of raised myself and then i
01:43:15.320
abandoned her a couple years back but she didn't care she was i'm sure it was a good riddance for her
01:43:24.520
how old were you when you abandoned her um let's see i just got married so i was 20
01:43:30.840
27 28 how many years ago was that six years ago i'm almost 40 so okay so um
01:43:42.840
your mother she lived like she didn't have kids so you would just be home for long periods at a time
01:43:48.280
or what yeah yeah she had different kinds of men in her life and would go on vacations with them and
01:43:54.760
do as she pleased and uh yeah i just my sister had a different dad so lots of baby daddies going on as
01:44:00.520
well how many different siblings did you have are we counting half blood half step x step whatever
01:44:08.600
i have a whole complicated i have three half siblings wow how many fathers
01:44:17.080
three slash we're gonna put an asterisk on that it could be four
01:44:20.600
more wow he was out in the streets man good oh yeah she was nasty she was she was something else
01:44:29.960
but yeah so she i mean she lived her life however and and so i ended up abandoning her but she was okay
01:44:35.160
with it so it's kind of on topic i suppose was there something that was the straw that broke the camel's
01:44:40.280
back where you're just like i gotta leave this behind yeah actually my wedding so my husband and i
01:44:46.200
were trying to make our guest lists and talk about weddings and the cost of that was so outrageous that
01:44:52.360
we were both just like let's just like elope so we ran off and um she got upset that i had taken a
01:45:01.400
special moment away from her for being able to be a part of it and um then told the rest of the family
01:45:07.560
what a terrible person i was for doing so and i was like wow you haven't visited me in 10 years
01:45:14.040
i don't understand so i was like i can't you seem like you turned out okay though like you sound like
01:45:22.440
you have a good head on your shoulders um would you agree with that or did you have a lot of like
01:45:27.720
issues coming from that so i had a lot and there were different phases of grief i would say one was
01:45:35.960
uh why did they do this to me and like hating on my parents and her specifically and then because
01:45:45.640
both sucked and then my second phase was hating myself for perpetuating the issues that i had like
01:45:53.560
it's they're no longer here being a part of your life like you need to get over it yourself like you're
01:45:57.560
the one making your life miserable this way and then the third and final stage which i think is the
01:46:02.120
best stage is the stage of gratefulness that they both suck so bad that i was able to overcome any
01:46:08.760
obstacle put before me it's almost good that she wasn't around too much because then she probably
01:46:13.720
would have influenced you more yes actually i'm so grateful for that um doug mpa you got any other
01:46:21.480
questions for so um my mother was was verbally and emotionally abusive and um i was actually
01:46:32.680
was there any good traits okay what one of the only thing one of the only good things i got from
01:46:41.240
my mother who was emotionally and verbally abusive is that um there are situations that make other
01:46:46.600
people uncomfortable that aren't aren't uncomfortable for me because of how i grew up and a lot of people
01:46:53.960
notice that that about me and then um i'm able to take a lot more than a lot of people was there
01:47:01.960
anything that you could was there anything positive at all in hindsight that you could
01:47:09.400
take from either that you took from either one of your parents actually so many things i could give you
01:47:15.160
a list but i won't because i'm not a normal woman um i'll be succinct i uh definitely agree with you that
01:47:22.280
my endurance level for things is super high so that's grateful and then but another one for me is
01:47:28.840
because no one was around and like in my house at all i was alone a lot i actually had to learn
01:47:33.720
everything by myself and like i taught myself everything i've ever known how to do and that
01:47:39.800
characteristic as an adult is so beneficial that i can just teach myself how to do whatever i want
01:47:45.240
to do that's a great skill to have that's awesome and i bet you were like really ahead of your peers
01:47:52.920
too because you had um like you had to like you probably learned so much having to like raise
01:47:58.600
yourself basically did you feel like that or no yeah for sure i was definitely super advanced although
01:48:05.240
it's funny because i'll like i live with my husband we've been together for a long time and
01:48:10.840
once you live with someone that long you start realizing that a lot of the things you do is kind of
01:48:15.560
backwards because nobody showed me how and he was taught things and normal people that are taught
01:48:22.040
things have a specific way because everyone kind of follows the same guidelines for things so when you're
01:48:28.440
just teach yourself things you you kind of do things a little bit different but it makes me
01:48:32.200
think outside the box so it's very beneficial um when you first met your husband did you have to
01:48:39.320
learn how to how to how to live with another person and rely on another person because you were alone
01:48:44.920
a lot of your life so relying on someone else is not something i'm capable like i just it just seems
01:48:51.000
unfathomable to me um so i've always been we fluctuate as breadwinners we both work very hard we don't
01:48:57.400
have any kids um and i um um but living with someone i've done before roommates but with him
01:49:08.840
specifically i guess learning to love someone and be like that they could hurt your feelings if they
01:49:16.760
left you that part of that equation was difficult to overcome and adjust to being able to be that
01:49:23.800
vulnerable okay do you ever hear um because now like women are always talking about their trauma
01:49:34.680
uh yeah those people i've noticed that people um that have very tough upbringings it's it can be
01:49:43.240
difficult for them to like listen to like the women that talk about their like trauma is that a thing for
01:49:49.640
you at all or no i'm a misogynist first and foremost i've been for a very long time
01:49:55.160
i was raised by a streets walker and then um her mini me was a smarter street walker she became a
01:50:07.320
trophy wife um but um yeah no i listen to these people and i just can't i can't with them i can't
01:50:16.120
with women i actually have no friends um because i out of respect for my husband i don't hang out with
01:50:21.320
guys and out of respect for myself i don't hang out with other women wow well you can call into my
01:50:28.920
show anytime so if you're bored yeah i'd love to you have a lot of topics that i could go into if you
01:50:35.080
ever especially get into working with women that would be my dream to be on there but you want to go
01:50:41.000
on for a long time with me okay okay i gotta ask you just what's your do you so they say that 50 of
01:50:48.280
women would rather work for a male boss than a female boss do you agree with that stat yes okay
01:50:54.920
and then what is your worst just 30 seconds what is the worst thing that you have to deal with working
01:51:02.440
with other women them looking at me as competition and needing to wipe me out
01:51:09.240
that's a good one for me it's like the two-facedness i can't
01:51:21.160
yeah i can if they're coming after me if they're not coming after me i don't care what they're like
01:51:25.720
this is just a job i don't do social media so i don't have friends on social media i don't friend
01:51:30.200
co-workers even if i did so yeah that's that part about it is as women bosses they treat men better
01:51:38.920
they treat women like women in the workplace literally can't stand each other and i have no
01:51:42.840
idea why and the myth is that women are all all in together but they're really not no not i've coined
01:51:49.400
a term so it's not the sisterhood it's the shit stir hood that's awesome and i'm not invited so i got
01:52:01.160
kicked out a long time ago i got my past revoked well thanks for calling in um calling it was a
01:52:08.440
pleasure lovely yeah call him any any time okay i will for sure thank you so much for having me
01:52:13.880
up it was lovely to talk with you i love your show you guys have a great day thanks you too what a
01:52:20.040
great call we've had great callers today guys this is like 10 out of 10. sometimes i feel like i'm
01:52:26.760
talking into the abyss and so it i i love when i get good callers and they're just like well adjusted
01:52:37.480
cool people you know so last person it's gonna be nick nick how's it going
01:52:50.680
nick going once nick going twice sorry nick we're gonna let you go you gotta be ready next time
01:53:00.520
and that is everyone cool well this is a great show doug mpa yeah i knew it would be because we
01:53:11.320
gotta do a lot more shows on mothers i'm telling you guys mothers inflict infinitely infinite more
01:53:17.720
infinitely more damage on the children than fathers do especially to young girls because
01:53:23.240
oh yes think about it who's the first person that you hear say that you're too tall too short too
01:53:32.360
skinny too fat yeah your nose is too big your hair is too nappy you know who's the first person you hear
01:53:40.200
call a woman a slut or a it's your mom mom it's always your mom
01:53:45.640
telling you and then it's only gotten worse with this female empowerment feminism culture where
01:53:56.120
they're removing uh women from having to take accountability and then mothers from having to
01:54:06.200
yeah we could do a whole we could do we could do a show on every single type of mother like the
01:54:11.800
the career mother the you know like the different archetypes yeah the dead we'll have to write up a
01:54:18.200
couple yeah because the sad part about it is the career mother for the average female salary
01:54:32.840
is still thirty four thousand five hundred and forty six dollars and then the average male salary is forty
01:54:40.440
eight thousand so all these women are foregoing raising their children for freaking thirty four
01:54:49.720
come on now yeah well um thanks for the contribution doug mp you got any final thoughts um just what i said
01:55:04.680
do we have jay grant in here earlier i don't remember because i see him waiting there and i
01:55:15.240
don't remember if we had him in the show or not dude do you remember j grand i don't i i'm not great
01:55:20.360
with names i'm good with faces and voices guys but you you'll have to forgive me if i forget the names
01:55:26.680
go ahead you know what do you you would take this last one sure we can do one more okay
01:55:38.360
jay are you there hey can you hear me hey jay how's it going sorry about that i got a little busy there
01:55:47.880
okay um so what are your thoughts on the topic what's your experience with deadbeat moms
01:55:53.240
so i dated a a girl 17 well now 18 and a half years ago about told me she was on birth control
01:56:03.720
a week later i found out she was lying about that and some other things stopped uh talking to her
01:56:10.040
about 10 months later got a call back uh or started getting calls from her um finally answered
01:56:17.960
and uh told me that i i had a kid so after everybody telling me change your number she's
01:56:27.080
just trying to get you on on a child support i decided i'm just going to show up i don't need a
01:56:33.880
air out there that hates me and causing just destruction and so um so i showed up look just like
01:56:41.480
me and my whole world changed and um it went from fear to all right now i got i gotta take care of this
01:56:51.400
um a couple we started showing up bringing diapers and formula and stuff every other day or so
01:56:58.600
um wasn't usually seeing his mom there after a while and eventually i was leaving one day from
01:57:06.200
uh her mom's house where my son was and um she told me that i have to be honest with you i haven't seen
01:57:13.960
her in two weeks so i turned around and i told her i'm coming to get him got him all all the baby stuff
01:57:24.040
and called work said i need three months off i had some money saved because i was just single i was doing
01:57:30.600
pretty well at the time um it's a that's a long story i've started to write a book about um i'm
01:57:37.880
halfway through it but so i try to focus it on her and she was basically in and out of prison his whole
01:57:44.760
life if she wasn't in prison for something like assaulting a police officer or something else um she
01:57:51.720
was just not present and i gave her opportunity to to see him but um you know other than her mom
01:58:02.920
sneaking my kid uh to prison behind my back to visit her um he he only saw his mother a handful of time
01:58:13.000
so possession is 90 of the law or something like that in texas and i thought okay i have possession of
01:58:21.080
my son um my dad happens to be a family law attorney um who i hadn't spoke with in years his wife never
01:58:30.040
had children and i thought but i thought it would be the grandparents are important it would be the
01:58:36.360
right thing to do to introduce my son to his grandparents worst decision i ever made um they
01:58:44.520
kept asking me to let uh let them watch him you need a rest you look tired uh first night i let them
01:58:53.000
watch him i went to go pick him up and uh eight o'clock and they said oh just let us keep him overnight and
01:59:01.320
you can come get him in the morning called him on my way to get him in the morning
01:59:05.320
uh long story short i had to call the police to retrieve him uh stepmother my dad's wife had him
01:59:16.680
in the back office of the legal building where my my father has his office and so begun a long story of
01:59:26.920
seven different lawsuits i've been meaning to call you uh for a while um because i think the story is
01:59:33.240
valuable it almost it almost killed me but i won every time but not after false allegations protective
01:59:42.040
orders uh and these are from your your parents yes like i said my my father's wife never had kids
01:59:53.080
yeah needless to say i have some major trust issues but that she had tried to adopt in the past but
02:00:00.440
failed somehow so they i had a troubled past you know so how long did the whole process take before
02:00:07.640
you you but you have custody now my son's 17 and a half now i have full custody still um there were
02:00:15.480
periods of this yeah it's a very long story there were periods of oh they saw me carrying them up the
02:00:23.240
stairs by one arm so hence a uh yeah cpa see all all that kind of stuff i'm just wondering how long did
02:00:31.480
the whole legal process take like how old was the kid then and then how long were you in court in and
02:00:37.000
out of four short answer 15 years oh my god i'm telling you dozens of thousands of dollars on it
02:00:48.520
broke my bank several times just i thought i'm doing i'm going to do the right thing by my kid
02:00:54.680
turned out to be the it destroyed my life not my kid but the fight to
02:00:59.720
do the right thing for my kid but that's the first one for instance it took
02:01:07.160
uh at the time i was on felony probation for a marijuana charge in texas i was almost done with it
02:01:14.760
um and my father because he's an attorney uh got in contact with my probation officer told him a bunch of
02:01:23.560
stuff that uh wasn't true extended my probationary period another two years to um but basically it
02:01:32.360
took me six months to get full custody back and because your dad was a lawyer it was like even worse
02:01:40.840
free free for him thousands of dollars for me and and there were so many conflicts of interests that
02:01:47.720
it they don't care but i would bring up the word conflict of interest and they would
02:01:54.040
yeah it's the grandparent intervener acting as his own attorney hiring uh at litem attorney for
02:02:01.480
to represent my son though those attorneys have a relationship i could only afford a brand new attorney at the time
02:02:09.160
my father was i found out later was throwing her uh new business throwing her clients during
02:02:17.160
so that was only the first one that went all the way to trial that particular trial like most of our
02:02:23.240
trials went all day seven or eight hours and end with the judge giving me custody but i had to fight
02:02:30.920
and almost until i had a friend that graduated as an attorney i had to argue better than attorneys that
02:02:38.440
i could afford but the mother your topic sorry um like i said it's a whole book and things need
02:02:45.800
need to change with this because um it was me against the state against like the whole system
02:02:55.160
and i always eventually won but it almost it literally almost killed me several times how much
02:03:01.480
money his mother how much money did it cost would you say just ballpark i don't like to think about it
02:03:07.720
but um i mean there were times where i had to pay court supervised uh visitation to get my custody back
02:03:14.520
after a few months period they have me on child support paying me the months uh paying them the
02:03:20.520
months that i had they had my son based on false stuff um it i don't know fifty thousand dollars
02:03:28.600
probably yeah five thousand dollars here seven thousand dollars there three thousand dollars
02:03:34.920
here wow and the funny thing is child support they they start child support like that uh over a six
02:03:41.960
month period and there there was uh this last time uh took them eight months to stop it once i had
02:03:50.760
destiny my kid back but um your topic was the the mother um i don't wanna i could like i said it's a
02:03:59.640
whole book mother um two years so in texas when the child's 14 there can they can make their own
02:04:08.200
decision and of course he chose dad and which i admire because they were playing such games with his
02:04:15.640
head that um i mean with him with grandparents d's f's miss 75 days of school one year um just with
02:04:25.800
that few month period that they had them um mother as far as abandonment mother was found in a suitcase
02:04:33.720
outside of houston a year and a half ago um so holy the ultimate yeah i'll probably call back another
02:04:44.280
time um because i know this is a topic related to mother but um oh it's crazy yikes oh my goodness
02:04:55.160
yeah i hear some of your calls and i'm like ah that's nothing
02:04:58.200
that's how the guy i met the other day he said he'd like the mother abandoned the kid
02:05:06.920
and basically he got custody right away but now he's like a single dad and i'm like that sounds
02:05:12.360
awesome i'm like that's the stories i hear i'm like that's that sounds like a great deal actually
02:05:20.600
we're good they're they're a pain in the butt but you know even if they're a good kid like like mine
02:05:26.360
um they're just they're a pain in the butt but uh it's the ultimate goal in life you know like
02:05:35.960
it's all that matters you know fifty thousand dollars it doesn't matter
02:05:40.760
your kids are all that matter if they're out there you know yeah um but yeah it was every couple years um
02:05:48.520
the mother would get out of prison and they would deny these kind of things until i i had absolute proof
02:05:55.880
mother get out of prison uh all of a sudden my mother has money to file a lawsuit in texas there
02:06:02.840
has to be an open lawsuit or case for the grandparents to intervene so they would they
02:06:08.680
hire an attorney for her so that they could intervene so they basically say we'll we'll help you get
02:06:15.720
custody or help and i'm like you can see him i just need a clean drug test
02:06:20.680
and you know give me a clean drug test and you can see your kid never happen and so they would tell her
02:06:27.640
we want you to be able to see him in an effort to open up a grandparent intervener case against me
02:06:33.720
again and she'd be back in prison before um the court date come in and in orange jumpsuit suit and
02:06:42.840
shackles so basically yeah that happened for about 15 years wow often on every two years i was in
02:06:51.720
the last semester of nursing school they asked uh hey can we have christian and i'd always let them back
02:06:57.400
in because i wanted i thought if i let them back in you know they'll they'll they'll see that you
02:07:04.360
know my intentions are no they always finals week of uh bachelor's program they'd file they filed a
02:07:13.240
court date on um finals days they'd see when the finals were and file it
02:07:17.160
then and um all because something like this like can we take christian to oh shoot um uh scratch that uh
02:07:29.240
my son to uh the pool and i would say well we we've had planned to go to a barbecue not not today and a
02:07:38.680
week later there's a lawsuit to get uh grandparent visitation and it's it's always a vector to get full
02:07:46.120
custody you know wow but we won every time because you involved your parents too oh my god you had to
02:07:54.520
kick yourself because it was like do you think it would have prevented it had you just never involved
02:07:59.960
like introduced your dad absolutely my life our lives would have oh that's my goal was yeah oh yeah
02:08:09.080
yeah i was punished men men are are punished for doing the right thing specifically
02:08:15.960
in my case i just wanted to do the right thing by my kid and it just i wanted to get him uh wanted
02:08:25.320
to get off probation and get him to my mom in california so we could because i trust my mother
02:08:31.880
and she's on her fourth marriage but that's another story but um someone that i could trust and they um
02:08:39.080
i told i told her do not uh do not tell them that you're leaving with him and she want to do the
02:08:47.080
right thing and told him brought him so they could say goodbye well cops stopped my mom at the airport um
02:08:56.040
and and they commandeer my kid it's crazy how easy it was like i don't think they would have this easy
02:09:04.200
of time doing it to a mother or it's just especially a couple but because i was a guy it was just so
02:09:10.280
easy for them to just say something and they take most of the horror stories i've heard are from texas
02:09:16.040
actually i've heard terrible things about texas law the only thing good about texas is that child support cap
02:09:23.000
i didn't have to worry about that back then the most a woman can get from a man is twenty seven
02:09:30.280
hundred dollars no matter what the guy's income is yep well that's good but if your father happens
02:09:37.960
to be an attorney with a barren wife that's never had children uh careful that's that's why elon's
02:09:45.160
first like what seven eight kids no his first three were born in south africa but like every child after
02:09:51.640
that except for the one that he had with uh ashley st clair we're all born in texas yeah
02:09:59.800
interesting that's a crazy story but you'll have to call in again um i will on a different show
02:10:05.720
you sound like you got a lot to say yeah when i'm not in scrubs cool well thank you for calling
02:10:12.760
in to really appreciate it buddy yeah thank you pearl for what you do i appreciate you yeah thanks so
02:10:18.280
much for calling in good night thanks for uh trying back at my uh call again yeah cool all right okay
02:10:28.120
that's everybody well um my final thoughts are that i think um men are better people in general not all
02:10:38.040
and they make better dads and i hope that more women give up custody
02:10:41.640
so that they can do what they're best at so yeah um and then there's no show monday tuesday right
02:10:52.680
yeah no show monday tuesday but i'll be back wednesday guys
02:10:58.280
cool cool all right well um actually i'll probably schedule one of the sit downs that are scheduled for
02:11:05.800
next week next two days as a yeah i'll probably schedule it's complicated for tomorrow okay guys
02:11:13.000
well make sure you like the video on your way out subscribe to the channel thank you guys so much
02:11:17.080
for watching and i'll see you guys on wednesday bye