On this week's episode of the Not Gay Jarred podcast, host Steven Kreider is recovering from a knee injury, while his co-host, Jared "Not Gay" Jarred, talks about his trip to the emergency room. They also talk about the Pope's new immigration order, a man who dropped a trow in a Seattle bathroom setting gender rules, and more.
00:03:54.000You know, Courtney, one of our main writers at Courtney's Cost is Catholic, and she wrote a letter to the Vatican, shut up about immigration.
00:04:04.000Sometimes they don't read the bylines.
00:04:06.000And we put up that meme today about the Pope saying, you shouldn't be building walls, you should be building bridges, parading Donald Trump, and the Vatican is covered by a wall, surrounded by a wall.
00:05:45.000Is there anything wrong or immoral with saying, listen, we're going to put up our borders, we're going to strengthen our borders, put up a wall, and we're going to get rid of the people who've broken the law to get here.
00:05:53.000There is nothing morally wrong about that.
00:06:05.000Let me put this as simply as I can, okay?
00:06:07.000For people who are fighting about this, Christians and non-Christians and Trump supporters and non-Trump supporters and Pope fans and non-Pope fans, Trump knows about as much regarding the Bible as the Pope does regarding American immigration policy.
00:07:28.000And I will say it is completely and entirely unchristian of you to say that the Pope is anything like Christ or to say that speaking against the Pope in any way is blasphemy.
00:07:37.000If you say that, you really don't really understand Christianity or the main tenets of its faith.
00:07:43.000To say it's blasphemy to say, nah, the Pope's wrong in immigration.
00:07:46.000You're an idiot and you're very likely not a Christian.
00:08:46.000Now, what do I think is a very hard election would be, let's say, the candidate ends up being Cruz versus Bernie Sanders.
00:08:52.000Bernie Sanders is a more difficult opponent.
00:08:54.000I know everyone on radio is telling you the opposite.
00:08:56.000Bernie Sanders is a more difficult opponent because so many people hate Hillary Clinton.
00:08:59.000But Bernie Sanders versus Ted Cruz, in contrast with Hillary Clinton versus Donald Trump, would probably be...
00:09:07.000The most beautiful election in recent American history, certainly the last hundred years, to simply showcase the stark contrast socialism and the Constitution.
00:09:22.000If we were to ask this question, I don't know, ten years ago, maybe even eight years ago, I would say, well, of course no self-avowed socialist would win.
00:09:28.000You have an entire generation of people who don't even think it's a dirty word anymore.
00:10:31.000Hayek that we would have in our lifetime.
00:10:34.000For the first time, I think, in American history, you would have socialism, constitutionalism, boom, all the cards on the table and Americans would get to pick.
00:11:13.000They said if you called him a socialist, you really wanted to use the N-word.
00:11:16.000Here, this could be amazing and really beautiful in the sense of its purity, just seeing Bernie Sanders full-on socialism, free college, free everything, and Ted Cruz constitutionalism.
00:11:30.000Gosh, I'm not saying it'd be an easy fight.
00:11:32.000I'm not even saying that socialism would lose.
00:11:36.000But I just think it's a fight we need to see.
00:11:42.000Everybody was kung fu fighting Those kids were fast as lightning In fact, it was a little bit frightening But they fought with expert timing This
00:12:14.000is Breaking News on Louder with Crowder.
00:14:09.000We'll move on without discussing the name that's his actual place.
00:14:12.000He says to me, I've got a problem with my girlfriend.
00:14:17.000We both travel a lot from work, and when we get back, we're both too tired, but she is more tired than me, and I want to get some of my loving on, and sometimes she doesn't want to do the same.
00:14:32.000This is a problem that has plagued a lot of Americans, particularly the executive types, who are always doing the traveling and being important.
00:14:41.000So what you gotta do is make sure you take some time, see, for both of yourself when you're not traveling.
00:14:50.000So the next time you're both crossed paths, let's say in a layover, maybe you're both going to across the country, but you're stopping in Chicago.
00:15:00.000Take her to one of the airport lounges.
00:15:03.000You can get a day pass, and you can go in, and they got free white and food.
00:15:10.000When she goes to take some of the free white and food, you're going to slip some drugs in the white and maybe the food all around as much as you can get in the system, because then she's going to lay over on the airport lounge, and you go to the hippity-bop-bop-ba-doop-ba-doop.
00:15:27.000This has been Your Dating Advice Minute.
00:15:30.000With Bill Cosby Whoa, Jared, what are you doing?
00:17:06.000Alright, we're going to bring up Larry Elder after the break to talk about Clarence Thomas, Justice Scalia, and he also was talking about Donald Trump, and he claimed that George Bush lied about WMDs and should have been impeached.
00:17:19.000So, Larry Elder has some opinions about that, and my gosh, I just loved his mustache.
00:19:49.000And this is why we're going to be playing, later on in the show, newest gender pronouns.
00:19:53.000There are actually hundreds of genders that you don't know about, so we pull them from Tumblr, and we're going to explain new genders to you every week.
00:22:50.000And we talked, if you go back and listen to that, it was, you really think some guy is going to use this to just go in the woman's changing room?
00:26:49.000I was walking to work the other day, and I fell on a peppermint latte grande, and it went in my mouth, and I drank it, And I did that for about four more months.
00:27:46.000I'm ticking off the social justice warriors.
00:27:48.000You should see the amount of hate I get on there.
00:27:51.000Far, far, far worse than any Fat Sports Illustrated model or Black Lives Matter charlatan.
00:27:56.000So listen, it's free, you get to be entertained, and you can chime in.
00:27:59.000Also, if you're following me on Twitter, you can send me your tweets, and maybe you'll be lucky enough, and I mean lucky enough, because I have a lot of followers, okay, that they call me the follower machine, to have your tweet to me, or not Gay Jared, included in our rockinest tweet of the week.
00:28:15.000So follow me on Twitter, at escrowder.
00:31:18.000Well, the Senate's role is advise and consent.
00:31:22.000They also have to vote on the nominee, but there's no rule that requires them to vote on the nominee, let alone vote on the nominee in a president's lame duck year.
00:31:30.000And Chuck Schumer in 2007 and Bush's last year said he wasn't going to approve any nominees whatsoever.
00:31:36.000Barack Obama, as I mentioned, joined a filibuster to stop Sam Alito from even coming to the floor for a vote.
00:31:42.000So when the shoes on the other foot These guys have no problem whatsoever trying to get their guys to know.
00:31:47.000When it's not, then they yell and scream.
00:32:13.000Elder, this is important, but I also sort of wanted to talk, because you were really obviously with the Clarence Thomas thing at the forefront, and that is interesting to sort of go back to.
00:32:23.000about how politically correct we've gotten.
00:32:27.000Because it was on Twitter, and there's an entire generation I know about this, and the Coke can, and the short and curly.
00:32:33.000There's an entire generation who doesn't know, and so they believe that Clarence Thomas is a horrible womanizer and sexual harasser who still is sitting on the court.
00:32:41.000As briefly as you can, for those dumbasses listening, let them know what the big scandal was about with Clarence Thomas.
00:32:46.000Well, first you have to go back to the prior nominee, and that was Robert Bork.
00:32:51.000Robert Bork in 1987 was nominated by Ronald Reagan.
00:32:54.000Now, normally these things don't make any real difference, but Bork was going to replace a liberal, and the court would have then shifted 5-4 in favor of the conservatives.
00:33:02.000Believe it or not, Antonin Scalia, arguably the most conservative justice who's serving right now, or was serving, Got confirmed unanimously, not a single vote against him.
00:33:11.000Ruth Brady Ginsburg, very liberal, not a single vote against her.
00:33:15.000Nobody cared until all of a sudden the court was going to shift from liberal to conservative, and then Robert Bork was nominated, and he was called everything but a child of God.
00:33:25.000He was defeated on the floor, so Bush submitted, excuse me, Reagan submitted another conservative, a black one, hoping that even the Democrats weren't going to stop this guy because he would have been the second black guy to be on the Supreme Court.
00:33:37.000But it turns out that a woman surfaced named Anita Hill, who used to work for him, who claims he sexually harassed her.
00:34:39.000Well, I wonder if that's a problem with when you had the mustache.
00:34:43.000You know, that can be confused if you leave it there, and you're burning it off, and you have the half-Hitler, and you're leaving hairs everywhere.
00:35:04.000Well, I just wanted to briefly touch on that because he was trending, I'm sure you saw, on Twitter, where people were praising the death of Scalia.
00:36:25.000We care about black people, left-wing, until there's a black conservative who, of course, refutes the whole narrative that blacks are oppressed, that the man is still holding his back.
00:36:35.000And so somebody like Clarence Thomas, and if I may say Larry Elder, are a direct breath of that narrative, and therefore we have to be maligned as Uncle Toms and sellouts.
00:36:43.000And also, that character is inaccurate, because the one time I've seen Antonin Scalia with a full shot, which I'm sure no doubt thrilled Dick Morris, he was wearing brushed suede shoes.
00:39:37.000After the break, I want to give you more of the floor so we can talk about your column on Donald Trump.
00:39:41.000And Iraq, because I thought it was important and interesting, but we can't do that in the next two minutes.
00:39:46.000But, staying on this frame with sort of Clarence Thomas, do you feel that in 2016, after our Barack Obama presidency, we are more racially divided or united than, say, in 2001 or 1999?
00:39:59.000We are less racist now than ever before, but we're still walking on eggshells because if you criticize Obama, Jimmy Carter, the former president, said about Obamacare that he wouldn't have gotten the same criticism Had he been a white president, which is bull, because Hillary Care, which was done by Hillary, who's white, was also criticized.
00:40:17.000The point is, people are walking on eggshells.
00:40:19.000If you criticize Obama too harshly and you're white, you're perceived to be racist.
00:40:24.000You criticize him too harshly and you're black, you're an Uncle Tom.
00:40:26.000But we get along better than ever before.
00:40:28.000The number one way of telling whether or not a society is working out is interracial marriage.
00:43:27.000And I'm very grateful to be here at the town hall discussing these issues that matter with you people in the United States.
00:43:35.000I think division has been a very serious problem in this country.
00:43:39.000And coming together in a place like this is emblematic of the power The American people still have in themselves.
00:43:48.000On the issue of life, I firmly believe that we must either determine to be a culture of life or of death, and as it relates to abortion and plan...
00:44:01.000Wait, is Donald Trump actually saying that?
00:44:04.000We'll keep you updated when we return to Dr.
00:44:07.000Ben Carson's Town Hall on CNN with Anderson Cooper who likes the film.
00:44:13.000You're a strange animal That's what I know But you're a strange animal I got to follow Oh, I'm in the speedy
00:46:58.000Where I believe unless there is a stark contrast, if a Republican is put in there who's effectively a leftist, I do think that you'll never see another conservative elected because they'll say, well, we tried both sides, they're all the same.
00:47:09.000And that's where, don't you think that Bernie Sanders versus Ted Cruz would be as far as, you know, you're interested in ideas?
00:47:14.000Don't you think that would be the most beautiful election as far as purity and contrasting true ideas?
00:47:20.000I hadn't thought about it, but probably so.
00:47:22.000Bernie Sanders is obviously a socialist, but I think the entire party is a socialist party.
00:47:30.000He wants paid tuition, so does Hillary.
00:47:32.000He wants paid family leave, so does Hillary.
00:47:35.000He wants to take from the rich, give from the poor, so does Hillary.
00:47:37.000He wants to tax the rich even more, so does Hillary.
00:47:40.000They both have an anti-free trade policy now.
00:47:42.000So there really isn't a whole lot of difference between the two of them, other than Bernie Sanders has been saying the same kind of stuff a longer time.
00:47:48.000But if you look at the mandatory, the payroll taxes and the mandatory health insurance sort of premium tax, I think Bernie does go, and he wants to start the higher taxes a little bit further down.
00:47:57.000My point is he's more open and honest about it.
00:48:31.000That's why he's not brought up campaign contributions to the Clinton Foundation.
00:48:35.000That's not why he brought up the women that Hillary apparently was blind.
00:48:38.000Anita Broderick, a woman that claimed she was raped by Bill Clinton, says two weeks after the election, Hillary came up to her and verbally intimidated her.
00:48:45.000Anybody else running for president trying to really get elected would bring that kind of stuff up.
00:48:48.000The fact that he is not It suggests to me that he really was there to have a good time.
00:50:37.000Indeed, George W. Bush was more skeptical about the intel that was brought to him by George Tenet, the CIA director, who served, by the way, both under Bill Clinton and George W. Bush, gave them both the same intel.
00:50:47.000He said it was a slam dunk that the intel was there.
00:50:50.000We have 16 intelligence agencies that do investigations on the intel, 16.
00:50:54.000All 16 said at the highest level of probability, there's no such thing as 100% certainty, all 16 said that Saddam Hussein had WMD.
00:51:03.000The only quarrel was over how far along he was getting a nuke.
00:51:28.000Well, it's basically a Republican using code pink talking points, who also was a borderline truther.
00:51:33.000I think it's important to note, and I think, listen, it's also important to note that you can disagree with the war in Iraq, as many libertarians do, and not necessarily accuse George Bush of lying.
00:51:43.000Before we go, Larry Elder, where can people find you one last time, real quick?
00:52:46.000As someone who is a neurosurgeon with a high educational pedigree, like myself, how you could be so misled into believing that the pyramids had oatmeal in them?
00:53:00.000Well, listen, I think that's an unfair characterization of what I put forward.
00:53:06.000I believe that there are many different theories about what's going on in the pyramids.
00:56:01.000For simpletons like me who don't know a whole lot about wine, just what I like, it makes it easy.
00:56:06.000I either get to call, go to the website, talk with a sommelier, list what I like, what I don't like, my budget, and can have it shipped directly to my door, or gift-wrapped and sent to a friend.
01:03:18.000So I swear to you, the Gerald Ford Museum, you walk in, it's got the Gerald Ford stuff, I think like his old football uniform, a few things.
01:03:40.000I've been to the Reagan Library, and you're like, wow, this is just unbelievably impressive.
01:03:44.000The Gerald Ford Museum is a triangle to fool you.
01:03:48.000Listen, I want to talk about one thing that a lot of people, I think, right now, you know, Donald Trump, when asked about Israel, said, okay, who in the audience is, yeah, I'm going to stay neutral on Israel-Palestine.
01:04:12.000I understand, you know, for people who don't understand the Israel sort of complicated thing, a lot of people say, why are we giving them so much money?
01:04:17.000And a lot of people say, well, Ron Paul is an anti-Semite because he doesn't want to give Israel any money.
01:04:22.000What Ron Paul is basically saying is, yes, we give Israel more funding than any individual country.
01:04:27.000But if you combine all of the countries around them that we work with, like Saudi Arabia, Egypt, well, at one time, I don't know what our relationships are like with Egypt.
01:04:33.000Now, if you collectively said no money to the Middle East and the United States, Israel would probably be better off.
01:04:40.000Because at that point, everyone around them doesn't have our business camaraderie relationship.
01:05:07.000We rely on them for a lot of intelligence.
01:05:09.000Listen, nearly every relationship in the Middle East that the United States has had at one point, and this is important because a Saudi Arabian prince just came out who, yes, was friends with the Bushes, and now he's basically advocating genocide against the Sunnis.
01:05:22.000For the longest time, we thought, if you had to simplify Islam, you're like, ah, the Sunnis are the good ones, the Muslims are the bad ones.
01:05:32.000So that blows your whole thing to hell right there.
01:05:35.000So nearly everyone we've had a relationship with at some point has screwed us, almost proactively, except for Israel.
01:05:43.000There's one place in there where people are allowed to be any religion, they're allowed to be any ethnicity, they're allowed to be any sexual orientation and not die.
01:05:51.000You may hate the Jews, but that's reality.
01:05:54.000And there's one place in the world where we have launching pads, we have landing areas, we have safe haven, and that entire dark cesspool of filth and sadness where dreams go to die that is the Middle East.
01:06:08.000So it's not just giving money to Israel.
01:06:10.000When people send these memes, oh, you want American soldiers to die for Israel, there'd be a lot more American soldiers dying if we didn't have an ally in Israel.
01:06:20.000And if you believe that the world would be safer for the United States having a worse relationship with Israel, you're just someone who doesn't understand how things work militarily.
01:06:31.000Listen, I can understand you from a libertarian standpoint not being a non-interventionist.
01:07:22.000So if we're going to talk about war for oil, and we're going to talk about, oh, Cheney and Halliburton, the last ally we would pick would be Israel!
01:07:51.000You don't know what a war for territory looks like.
01:07:54.000And the reason people don't know what a war for territory looks like is because they've actually been fortunate enough to live in a time where the world's first anti-evil empire, the world's greatest superpower that's ever existed, the United States, is an anti-empire.
01:08:07.000As opposed to taking all the territory that we could, like Canada, by, I don't know, midnight tonight.
01:08:26.000So when people say war for oil, it's because these people have never actually seen an evil empire in a war for land at work.
01:08:31.000They've only seen the United States, which they accuse of being an evil empire, and then they turn around, of course, and say it's too expensive with our nation building.
01:08:37.000Are we an evil empire or are we nation building?
01:14:45.000It's kind of par for the course with Imam Chaudhry.
01:14:47.000So listen, Reuters has reported today that radioactive material has gone missing In Iraq.
01:14:53.000And that's a big reason why we wanted to have you on.
01:14:55.000So first question, have you had anything to do with it?
01:15:01.000See, Stephen, this is exactly why people do not trust the liberal media like you.
01:15:08.000You know, you are so quick to assume that it happened to be the international network of terrorists hellbent on destroying that entire region.
01:22:31.000Trump, many of your critics have said there has been a startling trend of you abusing the courts to advance your business and carrying that mindset into this campaign threatening to sue your opponents.
01:22:45.000Is that how you believe a president should conduct himself?
01:23:46.000Loser in his, her, or Z's mother's basement watching this on the YouTube live stream.
01:23:51.000Listen, YouTube is great, but it's not always super convenient if you're on the go.
01:23:56.000That's why this show, which is actually syndicated as a radio show, is available on iTunes, SoundCloud, or any kind of podcatcher that you Android users...
01:24:05.000Just search Louder with Crowder, find it, subscribe, you get the full show and some exclusive content that you actually won't hear on YouTube, including giveaways, extra commercials, me beating Not Gay Jerry within an inch of his life, but it's okay, he always comes back into work so I can fire him.
01:24:21.000So iTunes, SoundCloud, or Podcatcher, get the full show and listen to Louder with Crowder on the go.
01:24:26.000If you don't, you're probably a racist rapist.
01:27:10.000So the reason, actually, I forgot, I reached out to you last week, and then I had all this whole kerfuffle, see, that happened with my knee, so we moved you over, was Ted Cruz and the draft.
01:27:22.000Now, I know you're not even necessarily a conservative, but he was the one guy who said, like, no, I don't think women should be in the draft.
01:28:13.000There are people changing tires on military vehicles.
01:28:16.000There are people cooking French toast for guys in barracks.
01:28:19.000There are all kinds of positions there that are not combat positions that don't require the kind of training, don't require putting our daughters in, you know, in a foxhole, you know, being bombed and being shelled.
01:28:34.000And frankly, when you look at the responsibilities that men have had through history and how that balanced out the extra rights that they had on top of what women had.
01:29:06.000But the reason why they opposed it was because they didn't want the responsibilities that came with citizenship for men.
01:29:13.000And those responsibilities were not just military conscription.
01:29:16.000It was being part of bucket brigades, being part of posses, if ordered to do so, assisting police officers, assisting fire marshals, hue and cry laws that required...
01:29:27.000Hugh and Crylaw would hold a man as responsible as the perpetrator if he failed to intervene.
01:29:34.000Did you, real quick, because I brought this up after having an interview with you.
01:29:39.000I had kind of a cursory knowledge, and I've looked up a lot of your speeches.
01:29:42.000And I was actually at a movie theater, and they were showcasing suffragettes, you know, with Meryl Streep, who's now in hot water for her African comments.
01:29:48.000And I told the lady there, who was clearly a feminist, you know, listen, I just thought she looked like a feminist.
01:29:53.000It's not that And I said, well, do you know why a majority of women opposed, actually, the right to vote?
01:29:59.000And I talked, like I said, Bucket Brigade, the draft.
01:30:01.000And she's like, I'm not sure if that's true.
01:30:04.000Actually, she said, I'm not sure if that's true.
01:30:05.000And then she went and bought a plaid shirt at Orbis.
01:30:07.000But I said, actually, there's a great girl you should look up.
01:30:30.000It's not like I'm arguing against women having the vote.
01:30:34.000What I'm arguing for is for women to...
01:30:37.000And we have seen this sort of steadily over time.
01:30:42.000Women, they gained the rights that men had while maintaining their privileges and their exemptions from the obligations that typically went along with those for men.
01:30:52.000And they have slowly but surely over time, you know, sometimes it's 50 years, sometimes it's 75 years.
01:30:57.000five years, sometimes it's 100 years, right, before women are forced to take on the obligations that went along with those rights for men back when women got the same rights as men.
01:31:10.000So, I mean, you have this sort of move towards an equalization of responsibility, and that's a really good thing, right?
01:31:17.000And that's not necessarily saying that...
01:31:20.000Sorry if there's noise in the background.
01:31:39.000Well, it brings up, though, an interesting sort of dilemma now because you have people like Ted Cruz, who are more conservative, who said, no, I don't think women should be in combat.
01:34:04.000So, I... My story is I was born a man, but now I don't want to be a man anymore.
01:34:09.000And so I want to get my twigs and berries removed.
01:34:13.000And so I went to the doctor and I didn't pay for health insurance.
01:34:17.000I was on my way to pay for health insurance at one time, but then what happened was I fell on a sidewalk and I fell on a heroin, you know, and then I had a problem and I had to sustain it, but I never ended up getting health insurance.
01:34:26.000And then now the doctors say that the sexual reassignment surgery is...
01:34:32.000It's an elective that it's not covered and that I could technically still function with a penis that I was born with, but I don't want to function with the penis that I was born with.
01:34:39.000I want a non-functioning vagina and a catheter and I need you to pay for it!
01:34:44.000In a Bernie Sanders presidency, these Americans will be heard and Bernie Sanders will help them!
01:36:51.000You know how sometimes when your underpants twist your wiener into weird shapes where it's kind of like the super soaker that could go around corners because you sat funny?
01:37:01.000Please be sure to check your apparatus before use to avoid public embarrassment.
01:39:16.000Top of the hour, we are back with Karen Straughan of GirlWritesWhat, YouTube.com slash GirlWritesWhat, or follow her on Twitter, GirlWritesWhat.
01:39:57.000So how do you try to convince people or educate them with something like this, with a Ted Cruz situation where it's an uproar, everyone's offended?
01:40:05.000How do you react and how do you try and coach people?
01:40:07.000Well, I think I would tell someone like Ted Cruz that there's absolutely no way women belong in combat.
01:40:14.000That they just, they absolutely don't.
01:40:18.000Even women who meet all of the standards and can do all of the tasks, right?
01:40:24.000They have, like, even just in infantry, particularly in elite forces, There is permanent damage to your body from what your body is being put through.
01:40:37.000Not just in training, but actually out in the field.
01:40:41.000And that damage is going to be much, much worse for a woman.
01:40:47.000You will end up with women who will permanently lose their fertility because they have been in very, very, very intense physical labor in, say, the Marine Corps or something like that.
01:41:01.000They will lose their fertility permanently.
01:41:03.000They will suffer, like, extreme bone loss, right?
01:41:46.000He was begging for one more day, and he was let go against my marriage.
01:41:49.000When my lover calls, Stephen, love must answer.
01:41:51.000This is the first time, Jared, this is the first time I've actually seen you, and now I can see what Stephen was talking about when he said that gay guys hit on you.
01:42:01.000Well, it goes a little further than hitting.
01:43:56.000We were probably pulling a staff of about 400 people because even just for the maintenance on those planes and keeping them flying, keeping them in the air, you're looking at a team of 10 to 12 people per plane, right?
01:44:12.000There's no shortage of positions in the military that are perfectly doable by women, right?
01:44:21.000And the whole thing really boils down, this resistance to women being drafted, in my opinion.
01:44:27.000Because it's not like we're just going to shoot...
01:44:39.000It's not like they're going to just pool everybody and they're just going to randomly pick people.
01:44:47.000This group of people on the left side of the room are going to go into the foxholes, and this group of people are going to go into support positions.
01:45:18.000I hope that people hear this and they educate themselves a little bit more.
01:45:24.000On why this is the case, because you have these films that come out in Suffragette, and you leftists are great at drawing this sort of emotional connection to paint a story that just isn't accurate.
01:45:33.000And I think Ted Cruz would actually share your position.
01:46:25.000You know that if you're in the military, that if you allow yourself to be sunburned, you can actually be prosecuted for that because you've damaged U.S. property.
01:46:42.000And so, I mean, if you actually do something stupid that makes it impossible for you to actually perform your duties...
01:46:52.000that you can you can be charged with a crime for that you can be you can be court-martialed for that right but it's it's a well-known very not very uh much spoken of secret in the military that when women are deployed um they have a very high rate of becoming pregnant within a very brief period of time well it could just be because of all those stud muffins in the military they They look at you when you get pregnant.
01:48:01.000I heard it from a female sergeant when I was in Guantanamo Bay, and she said that actually the only place that'll matter anymore will be the Marines.
01:48:08.000She said because in the Army they send her girls, and in basic training they cry because she yells at them, and so now they don't allow sergeants to yell at them.
01:48:14.000So the classic Lee Ernie scene from Full Metal Jacket doesn't happen anymore because...
01:48:18.000What is your major malfunction, soldier?
01:50:21.000For simpletons like me who don't know a whole lot about wine, just what I like, it makes it easy.
01:50:26.000I either get to call, go to the website, talk with a sommelier, list what I like, what I don't like, my budget, and can have it shipped directly to my door, or gift-wrapped and sent to a friend.
01:50:42.000I know you do, Lyle, but you're an elitist bastard.
01:50:44.000That's why for simpletons like me, I prefer simplifiedwine.com or just calling 844-297-WINE. Hey, Jesse Ventura here, former governor of Minnesota.
01:56:13.000They say, okay, we'll send you to go get an MRI on your knee.
01:56:17.000So then they send me the following Saturday to get an MRI. So basically, between the total blowout of my knee, which I now know requires immediate surgery as soon as possible, to diagnosis for that knee was 11 days.
01:56:37.000But in the United States, that just seems really long.
01:56:40.000And so the first doctor I went back to, and Mark Ripeteau, Coach Mark Ripeteau, who wrote Starting Strength, sent me in with specific instructions.
01:56:47.000And he said, listen, if you have any ligament tears, don't leave there without surgery.
01:56:51.000Because if you can repair a ligament, you have to do it quickly.
01:57:58.000He just told me he was puzzling over my MRI. He literally, no one had looked at that MRI until I was sitting on the, as Seinfeld calls it, the deli paper in the doctor's office in the waiting room.
01:58:07.000No one had looked at it, and he was just, and every time I asked him a question, he basically responded with, well, I'm a doctor, if you want to go with your friend's advice.
01:58:14.000So, and then before I leave, I go, hey doc, I go, hey doc, what's this?
01:58:17.000For those people watching, I have a ligament here in my clavicle that I don't have on my left side.
01:59:57.000He wouldn't have even thought to test it.
02:00:00.000So, do your education, get a good doctor, do your due diligence, and sometimes your doctors are wrong, just like someone gets it wrong on your car, right?
02:00:06.000How many times do you have a clanking, you go to repair it, and it doesn't get repaired, and then you go back in, some other mechanic says, no, this is what's wrong.
02:00:12.000Well, that's what happened with doctors, only it's your body.
02:03:43.000That's some kid who wants to sound important, or some chick who's not attractive who's trying to make guys interested in her, or a guy trying to make girls think he's complex.
02:05:33.000Newest gender pronouns Newest gender pronouns Sweeping all over science and stuff We're getting really good with the music here at Lotter with Crowder.
02:09:04.000I was walking to my friend's house, and I fell on the sidewalk, and there was this guy there, and I accidentally fell in the sky, and his penis went inside of me, and so I got pregnant, and this mean Republican in my state wouldn't let me get a late-term abortion, and so now I'm pregnant, and I need you to pay for it!
02:09:27.000In a Bernie Sanders presidency, these Americans will be heard and Bernie Sanders will help them.
02:09:57.000Now this week's letter comes to me from Russell in Syracuse, New York.
02:10:08.000And he says, I got myself a woman and she wants to be with me.
02:10:16.000But when it comes to the boudoir, she doesn't want to do some of the weirdest stuff that I would like to do.
02:10:26.000Oh man, Russell, had this problem at one time or another.
02:10:32.000Sometimes you're jealous because you're just doing the same old vanilla and the person down the block has a Vietnamese sex addict and you're getting jealous like a jealous bee.
02:12:03.000He knows that two passionate people together, it's not quite the fairy tale that people think it is, but in some ways it's better, and then in some ways it's far worse.
02:13:36.000Crowder, you take a different position, whereas I think that was a victory, because now I'm going to get my body fixed, and I went to a good doctor who took care of me.
02:14:27.000I was prepping you a couple hours before we went in by trying to suddenly say, you know, if you're really positive and really nice to them, I think they'll want to give you the best care possible and don't complain and go and be really positive about the care you think they're going to give you.
02:15:17.000So, yeah, we walked into the office, and I knew that my attempts had failed because...
02:15:24.000We walk over and the first person you start talking to is the receptionist and you're complaining about how long it took for them to see you.
02:15:33.000And I'm like, well, this isn't in her control.
02:15:35.000No, I asked her if it seemed like a long time, 11 days, to see a doctor and get a diagnosis on something that should have been operated on within that time.
02:15:43.000But then you also told, like, the waiting room nurse that.
02:15:51.000But I think you were setting yourself up for failure.
02:15:53.000Because I think that she then went in and whispered to the doctor, He's difficult.
02:15:59.000Because when the PA came in, I don't know if you picked up on this.
02:16:03.000I was already squirming with awkwardness in the corner.
02:16:06.000But the PA came in with the doctor and her face was beet red when she came in before they even said anything.
02:16:12.000So I felt almost as if she knew something we didn't.
02:16:14.000Do you mean when she walked in and said, yeah, we were just puzzling over your MRI? Because the first time I ever even glanced at it was before I came in there, which is why I was upset to begin with?
02:16:32.000It was a really awkward experience if you're the wife or the onlooker because we sat there and Stephen debated with the doctor in a heated manner for, I'm not kidding you, probably 45 minutes as if the doctor was a Democrat.
02:16:46.000That's how intense you were in your debate.
02:16:49.000And there were moments there where I'm like, okay, maybe I need to step in.
02:16:53.000Maybe I should say something because I'm worried that the doctor is going to run for his life scared of Stephen because you're just so...
02:19:37.000You know, this left-right paradigm that's been fed to the American public, and this pop culture for profit, media-driven entity is designed to keep you in the sand.
02:19:48.000So that you don't focus on what's really mattering to Americans.
02:19:52.000Which Kardashians on which magazine cover with which ass.
02:20:13.000Hey, if you're listening to or watching this podcast, there's a strong chance that you are not yet following me on Twitter, at SCrowder, where I'm tweeting all day long.
02:20:23.000I'm ticking off the social justice warriors.
02:20:25.000You should see the amount of hate I get on there.
02:20:27.000Far, far, far worse than any Fat Sports Illustrated model or Black Lives Matter charlatan.
02:20:34.000You get to be entertained and you can chime in.
02:20:36.000Also, if you're following me on Twitter, you can send me your tweets and maybe you'll be lucky enough.
02:20:41.000And I mean lucky enough because I have a lot of followers, okay, that they call me the follower machine to have your tweet to me or not gay Jared included in our rockinest tweet of the week.
02:21:43.000When I got in, I had a grant, and I went to college, but I was supposed to maintain a certain grade point average.
02:21:48.000And then what happened when I was going to take my test, I fell on a heroin needle, and so it went inside me, and I had heroin, and it caused a problem, and then they also, they said that I wasn't 115 Cherokee, which I didn't know when I filled out the application, and that combined with my GPA was a 1.4, but it was because of the heroin needle that I fell out on the sidewalk, and now they want to kick me out of school, and I can't be, and they're saying that because it was fraudulent, I actually need to pay student loans, and I don't want to pay student loans, and I need you to pay for it!
02:22:18.000In a Bernie Sanders presidency, these Americans will be heard, and Bernie Sanders will help them.
02:22:26.000Not good enough, America! America! America!
02:24:20.000Okay, so real quick, Stephen sees an 82-year-old man walking with a cane, and Stephen's hobbling with his cane, and he makes sure he hobbles extra fast so he can run up to the old man and tell them that they're brothers.
02:24:44.000You probably felt this when you were in some kind of, you know, your weird not-gay surgery and you had met someone else who shared common ground.
02:24:51.000No, I've never run up somebody and said I'm their brother.
02:25:15.000So it's been funny because as Steven's been a gimp, people don't know.
02:25:19.000They kind of think because they can't see an Inger.
02:25:22.000They just see him hobbling along with a cane.
02:25:24.000Most of them probably think this is some type of permanent ailment.
02:25:27.000And so I kind of think I'm getting one of two responses.
02:25:31.000If we're out somewhere and Steven happens to open the door for me with his gimp leg and I walk through the door, they think that I'm Satan's girlfriend incarnate.
02:25:42.000Not that Steven's Satan, but I'm a terrible woman because I'm letting this gimp open the door for me.
02:25:46.000I love how her negative comment about her is still an indictment on me.
02:25:55.000Or if they just see us walking along on the street, they probably think I'm your girlfriend and that I'm a true saint for dating a cripple.
02:26:02.000Well, remember that guy at the brewery when we went there and I was just walking through?
02:27:19.000It'll be excellent, just like my sandwiches.
02:27:22.000So, I'm traveling back from Phoenix last Thursday, and I'm in one of those dinky little planes where you have to walk outside and walk up a terrifying ladder.
02:27:48.000So just wanting to be a decent human being, I offered to carry her bag and my bag.
02:27:55.000I'm carrying up the plane for her and just trying to do my best to help her out.
02:28:00.000So get up to the plane and opening up all of the luggage bins, trying to place both her bag and my bag, I notice that these geriatrics have filled the bins with their coats.
02:28:11.000So I say in a chipper voice, not sure who these coats are, but I'm just going to move them right across the aisle so I can make room for this young lady's bag.
02:29:21.000If you touch my coat again, I'm going to knock you to the ground.
02:29:26.000And so I start to like laugh a little and repeat what he's saying because I'm like surely he must be doing that weird old people thing where he's trying to joke and it's not funny.
02:29:45.000He threatened to knock you to the ground.
02:29:47.000He threatened to commit a serious crime.
02:29:49.000This is what he did because he was too weak to knock me to the ground.
02:29:52.000He turned to this random woman next to me who he had barely no interaction with and he started telling her what a kind person she was and how great her children were on the flight.
02:30:02.000I think because he wanted to rub in my face what an evil person I was for touching his coat.
02:30:07.000Even though that lady hadn't done anything for the poor pregnant woman.
02:30:12.000Well, this comes down to the battle of the victimized classes.
02:30:19.000Is it the 82-year-old man or the pregnant woman who takes priority?
02:34:43.000Anytime you even question the health of a woman who's a size 18, 5'7", and say, listen, you know, maybe that's not the best life choice...
02:34:53.000People get mad and they tell you that they're big and beautiful.
02:34:56.000My problem is not with the plus size models in Sports Illustrated.
02:34:59.000It's the rejection of the market, of the free market, of what people want in order to push an agenda, an agenda that ultimately leads to a lot of problems.
02:35:07.000I mean, listen, obesity is a huge problem in the United States.
02:35:09.000Michelle Obama said that it's a bigger threat than terrorism.
02:37:24.000And now it's time for Hopper, the anti-social justice warrior doggo doing you a public service. - the anti-social justice warrior doggo doing you a public service. - You need to check your sex privilege stump!
02:40:15.000And I will say, you know, I can vote for a multitude of people on that stage.
02:40:19.000Cruz is the one person who, if you actually look into his record, though, You know if someone would attack you if you had a cruise bumper sticker, it would be because of something conservative.
02:40:29.000What about the fact that he doesn't want to attack the rich more?
02:40:45.000If it's Trump, they'll say anything Trump's ever said.
02:40:48.000I feel like half people throwing out Gang of Eight don't actually really understand anything about it.
02:40:52.000No, I think on the Republican side they do.
02:40:55.000On the Republican side, but I'm talking about people on the other side, though.
02:40:59.000It's one of the things I feel like if you're not really informed on it, you could still kind of not really understand it, but kind of use it as a talking point that you're not really sure where the heads and tails of it is at.
02:41:18.000You're connecting with YouTubers, but we have radio stations that syndicate us, of course, at our wonderful home station, Wham!, and they're going to hear this, and it's going to be like nails on a chalkboard.
02:41:28.000It's okay, because they like me more than you.
02:41:29.000You know you don't end a phrase with that.
02:43:36.000The point is, because of my inherent distrust for blanket authority, now if he'd have said, hey, listen, you know what, I can't answer that question, but let me send you to someone who can.
02:43:45.000That's where I really have a lot of respect for someone.
02:43:47.000Someone who recognizes where they are not an expert and they're willing to delegate.
02:43:50.000I mean, that's what Henry Ford talked about.
02:43:52.000That is a sign of somebody, not necessarily of the utmost intelligence, but certainly leadership.