Louder with Crowder - July 03, 2015


Andrew Klavan Uncut and Uncensored! | Louder With Crowder


Episode Stats

Length

44 minutes

Words per Minute

190.8193

Word Count

8,501

Sentence Count

800

Misogynist Sentences

25

Hate Speech Sentences

47


Summary

Author Andrew Klavan joins Stephen and Jon to discuss his new novel, Werewolf Cop, and why he thinks the entertainment industry is dominated by leftist writers. Plus, a look at why the left is so hard to read and why the right is hard to understand.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 But what I think people are really offended by is this notion that we have to join in not seeing reality.
00:00:09.000 In not seeing reality.
00:00:10.000 I'm a woman now, you know?
00:00:11.000 I'm black.
00:00:13.000 Like Spider-Man!
00:00:14.000 Like Spider-Man.
00:00:15.000 It's like, I'm a spider.
00:00:16.000 Yeah, Spider-Man.
00:00:17.000 You're a Spider-Man.
00:00:19.000 Fund of Scott.
00:00:19.000 Careful.
00:00:20.000 This is his thing.
00:00:23.000 We're back.
00:00:23.000 So glad to have this next guest on with us.
00:00:26.000 We've had him on before, but we haven't had him on via Skype, so you can go to loudwithcredder.com if you're listening terrestrially to see his cute little punim, author of Werewolf Cop, Andrew Klavan.
00:00:38.000 Thanks for being on, sir.
00:00:39.000 It's a pleasure, sort of.
00:00:40.000 Yeah, I know.
00:00:42.000 Let's do away with the pleasantries here.
00:00:45.000 The social niceties, as it were.
00:00:48.000 They are not required.
00:00:49.000 It's miserable having to be on with you, Stephen.
00:00:52.000 This is as close as I get to Detroit, so it's very exciting for me.
00:00:55.000 Yeah, well, that's as close as any of us want to be to Detroit.
00:00:59.000 Hey, I love Detroit.
00:01:01.000 No.
00:01:02.000 Yes!
00:01:03.000 Great restaurants, great museums, all kinds of cool stuff.
00:01:08.000 If you survive, there's a lot of fun things to do while you're there.
00:01:13.000 What kind of restaurants do they have?
00:01:16.000 American Coney Island, Lafayette Coney Island.
00:01:19.000 The Hard Rock Cafe is a killer restaurant.
00:01:21.000 Slow's Barbecue is legendary.
00:01:24.000 Fundip, people want to hear what Andrew has to say.
00:01:26.000 Andrew, you need to come to Detroit and have some really fun time at all these great restaurants.
00:01:31.000 I'm on it, Fundip.
00:01:32.000 I'm on my way.
00:01:34.000 He rolls his eyes.
00:01:36.000 Yeah, exactly.
00:01:38.000 I mean, listen, if you're not Muslim or Polish, you have no business being in Detroit.
00:01:46.000 As a matter of fact, I am a Polish Muslim, but that's...
00:01:48.000 Oh, I used to love them.
00:01:50.000 Oleski, we call them.
00:01:52.000 Yes, exactly.
00:01:53.000 That was a great band, though, the Polish Muslims.
00:01:55.000 Yeah, the Polish Muslims.
00:01:55.000 There are very few of you around, so I'm so glad that we have one.
00:01:59.000 So, Andrew, okay, I mean, it's one of those things.
00:02:03.000 You have so much that you've done.
00:02:04.000 I've talked about this before, like when I met Clint Eastwood the one time.
00:02:08.000 I think we talked about this.
00:02:09.000 Game Dropper.
00:02:10.000 Yeah, well, no, it's because, don't worry, I end up looking like an ass.
00:02:13.000 I didn't know what to say.
00:02:14.000 You know, I met him, and he turned and he said, you know, I'm Clint.
00:02:19.000 He actually said his name.
00:02:20.000 And I remember going, I mean, what do you say?
00:02:23.000 I loved you in every which way but loose?
00:02:24.000 You know, like, what do you pick?
00:02:26.000 Oh, Clint Howard, I loved you.
00:02:29.000 So it's kind of the same thing with Andrew Klavan.
00:02:32.000 You've done so much that it's tough to just sort of pick a topic.
00:02:36.000 So, I mean, you write a lot of fiction.
00:02:37.000 So let's talk about that because there aren't many conservatives, I guess, out there or who are as outspokenly conservative, more so in the creative realm, you know, in writing fiction.
00:02:48.000 Why do you think it's so dominated by leftists?
00:02:52.000 Well, there's a couple of reasons.
00:02:53.000 One, they blacklist us.
00:02:54.000 I mean, in Hollywood, it's just true, you know, that you can lose work like that for being an outspoken left winger.
00:03:01.000 I mean, people who have come out, people who simply came out and would not back Obama, which is not even that far to the left.
00:03:08.000 I mean, you can be pretty middle of the road and not back Obama.
00:03:10.000 Yeah.
00:03:11.000 You know, they lost work.
00:03:12.000 And if you're not John Boyd, if you're not Clint Eastwood, you know, you are going to pay a price.
00:03:18.000 So that means that people keep their heads down.
00:03:20.000 And that's a little less true in the fiction world, but it's still true in the fiction world.
00:03:24.000 I mean, the publishing industry is completely dominated by New York left-wing sensibilities.
00:03:31.000 And it's not that they're evil.
00:03:34.000 It's that they just see the world so much that way that they assume that you must be evil for disagreeing with them.
00:03:39.000 Do you get...
00:03:41.000 A little bit of a Jew pass?
00:03:44.000 No.
00:03:44.000 No?
00:03:46.000 No, it makes it worse.
00:03:47.000 First of all, it's even worse.
00:03:47.000 Are you kidding?
00:03:50.000 I mean, how bad is that?
00:03:51.000 That means everybody hates you.
00:03:53.000 And secondly, no.
00:03:55.000 I will tell you a story talking to one of the smartest people in publishing I know, one of my favorite women in publishing.
00:04:00.000 I once said to her, look, I think I can promote this book by getting on Sean Hannity.
00:04:04.000 And she said, who's that?
00:04:06.000 Oh, gosh.
00:04:07.000 Now, it's one thing to say I never watch Hannity.
00:04:10.000 It's one thing to say, you know, I don't like Hannity.
00:04:12.000 But who's that?
00:04:13.000 Really?
00:04:13.000 You know, I mean...
00:04:14.000 Yeah, usually you hear that for Crowder.
00:04:15.000 Yeah, he's probably that.
00:04:17.000 Crowder, not even that.
00:04:18.000 Who?
00:04:18.000 I mean...
00:04:20.000 What's that?
00:04:22.000 Is that some kind of a pond scum that hasn't been identified yet?
00:04:26.000 No, thanks, Pondip.
00:04:27.000 You're such a great backup.
00:04:30.000 So, Andrew, you're right.
00:04:32.000 You kind of touched on that.
00:04:33.000 I remember I was in a meeting, and people will say it's not true.
00:04:37.000 Generally, I think people have greater victim complexes than exist in reality.
00:04:42.000 I'll acknowledge that.
00:04:43.000 But I do think this is one of those cases.
00:04:46.000 I mean, I remember I was right there.
00:04:47.000 I mean, I've been with major agencies.
00:04:49.000 You name...
00:04:50.000 The top five agencies, I've been with two of them.
00:04:54.000 And I remember being in a meeting.
00:04:56.000 One more before you're screwed.
00:05:00.000 Before they catch on.
00:05:02.000 Yes, before they catch on.
00:05:04.000 I remember being in a meeting and they were talking about an Obama fundraiser.
00:05:06.000 It's funny that you mentioned that.
00:05:08.000 And someone said, yeah, there's this thing going on.
00:05:10.000 We can show you around and introduce you to the rest of the team.
00:05:13.000 And my manager was there.
00:05:15.000 So, you know, you have a manager and an agent because you need a bunch of redundancies in the entertainment industry.
00:05:19.000 And my manager goes, no, he's more likely to be at the Palin fundraiser.
00:05:24.000 And I'm not even a Palin fan.
00:05:26.000 And they just went, oh.
00:05:30.000 And we're sitting there going, I mean, everyone, there might have been 16 people in that room.
00:05:35.000 You know these meetings, right?
00:05:36.000 The glorified Michael Keaton sort of Batman table.
00:05:38.000 And not a single person thought, well, wait, hold on a second.
00:05:41.000 Maybe he doesn't agree with us.
00:05:42.000 It was just, that's the starting off point.
00:05:44.000 Yeah, I know.
00:05:45.000 And you walk in, you know, as a screenwriter, you walk into a room to sell material.
00:05:49.000 And the way these meetings all work is you have small talk.
00:05:52.000 You start off with small talk.
00:05:53.000 And during the Bush years, the small talk would...
00:05:55.000 We'd literally sit, you know, you'd come in with your material to sell, your script or your idea, your pitch, and they would start off like, is that Bush an idiot or what?
00:06:05.000 And because I'm a loudmouth, I would say, well, actually, I sort of support him.
00:06:09.000 And it was like, hey, don't let the door hit you on your way out.
00:06:12.000 I mean, you are not selling that script in that room.
00:06:14.000 And it's just, it is very, it's not a blacklist, it's a graylist.
00:06:18.000 I mean, let's put it that way.
00:06:19.000 Very few people will literally throw you out of the room, but it makes a difference.
00:06:23.000 There's just no question about it, you know.
00:06:25.000 A gray list has got to be tough on you because you don't sun well.
00:06:28.000 You get kind of ashy.
00:06:31.000 You know, I thought what you were going to say is that I can't keep my mouth shut.
00:06:35.000 And that's unfortunately close to the truth.
00:06:38.000 A lot of guys have perfected this thing where, you know, somebody will say, is Obama great or what?
00:06:43.000 And I'll just go like, ah, you know, I haven't got that thing.
00:06:48.000 I'm more like, you know, like, oh, my.
00:06:52.000 Right.
00:06:53.000 It's fun to hurry up and then we have to go to a break.
00:06:54.000 It's really hard to do that where you shut up about something that bothers you that much.
00:06:59.000 And where you let people assume that you have principles that you don't have, that you have the opposite of, you know?
00:06:59.000 Right.
00:07:05.000 Well, if it were easier to do that, we'd all be leftists.
00:07:08.000 Slaughter with Crotter.
00:07:09.000 We'll be right back with Andrew Klavan.
00:07:11.000 We are back with Andrew Klavan, author of Werewolf Cop and so much else.
00:07:15.000 Follow him on Twitter at Andrew Klavan.
00:07:17.000 Andrew, so I wanted to talk with you about this.
00:07:19.000 We were just talking about this when I was filling in for Dana's show.
00:07:21.000 Have you seen the complaints about Spider-Man and Stan Lee's response?
00:07:25.000 No, this is new.
00:07:27.000 What's the Spider-Man complaint?
00:07:28.000 Oh, you haven't seen this?
00:07:30.000 Okay.
00:07:30.000 I've not heard this.
00:07:31.000 I don't mean to sandbag you.
00:07:31.000 I'm sorry.
00:07:32.000 No, that's all right.
00:07:33.000 Let's hear it.
00:07:34.000 Is this going to hurt your career?
00:07:35.000 I can't believe Andrew Klavan wasn't in the know.
00:07:38.000 They complained that they picked the new Spider-Man, and I think he's an English white guy, right, Jared?
00:07:44.000 Yeah, just like the last one.
00:07:45.000 Just like the last one.
00:07:46.000 I liked the last one a lot.
00:07:48.000 I thought he did a great job, both of the last two films, with the whole Gwen story arc.
00:07:55.000 I thought were really good.
00:07:57.000 I actually...
00:07:59.000 Yes, but it's not important right now.
00:08:01.000 No, I like them, except I thought the Jamie Foxx character was a little weird.
00:08:05.000 Yeah, he was kind of annoying.
00:08:07.000 Why do they have to reboot the story every two years?
00:08:09.000 Because they need to maintain the rights.
00:08:12.000 Do we have to tell the same Spider-Man origin story every two years?
00:08:15.000 I did hear that the new one is not going to have the origin story.
00:08:20.000 They're going to dive right in with him already being set, which is good because I would have just shot myself if I had to see him.
00:08:26.000 The same origin story again.
00:08:29.000 Oh, we've changed it a little bit.
00:08:30.000 Now the spider walks up his left arm instead of his right.
00:08:33.000 Well, no, they're actually going to jump right in, Clavin.
00:08:34.000 I don't know if you heard.
00:08:35.000 They're jumping right in at the moment.
00:08:36.000 Peter Parker wins an ESPY for Lorena Bobbitt-ing his penis.
00:08:40.000 So that's how...
00:08:42.000 The Marleys were dead to begin with.
00:08:44.000 I'm hoping you made that up.
00:08:46.000 So what's the complaint?
00:08:46.000 Yes, I did make that up.
00:08:47.000 So the legitimate complaint was that Spider-Man is white and he's straight.
00:08:52.000 And I guess there are different sort of parallel universes where Spider-Man is Latino or he's biracial or it's insane that he's gay.
00:08:59.000 So they're mad about this.
00:09:00.000 The guy identifies as an insect, huh?
00:09:05.000 How more trans species can you get?
00:09:08.000 I mean, he doesn't even identify as an animal.
00:09:10.000 He identifies as an eight-legged creature.
00:09:12.000 An arachnid, exactly.
00:09:14.000 I mean, I just feel like I'm this eight-legged bug, you know?
00:09:19.000 So that's how I put it down on my voting registration.
00:09:24.000 Arachnid Americans.
00:09:25.000 Right.
00:09:26.000 Arachnid Americans.
00:09:27.000 You're absolutely right.
00:09:28.000 But the point that comes with this is Stanley's response, which was fantastic.
00:09:33.000 And I think he's just sort of gotten to that age where he doesn't care anymore because he just said, listen, you wouldn't make the Black Panther Swiss.
00:09:41.000 He said, okay, I don't see why you have to change something that already exists.
00:09:46.000 They are what they are.
00:09:47.000 He said, how about creating new characters?
00:09:49.000 And then he ended it with, hell, I'll do it myself.
00:09:52.000 That's great.
00:09:53.000 That's great.
00:09:55.000 It's gone down to the point where...
00:09:58.000 I don't know if you see this in Hollywood.
00:10:00.000 I definitely see it everywhere else in the United States.
00:10:03.000 Where we've run out of white guilt.
00:10:05.000 And I think it's like, you know, it started at an all-time high, you know, when you had like, remember the Titans, and everyone's thinking, great, this is a great film, we need this.
00:10:13.000 And obviously, you know, everyone should be allowed to play football on the same team, and these race riots are terrible.
00:10:18.000 And now we've, you know, now that, you know, slavery's been abolished, everyone has the right to vote.
00:10:23.000 People, you have a black president.
00:10:25.000 They're down to not only comic books, but that he's straight.
00:10:30.000 This is like when Chris Rock complained.
00:10:30.000 Yeah, I know.
00:10:33.000 He said black people aren't wealthy.
00:10:37.000 They're rich.
00:10:38.000 Oprah's rich, but she's not wealthy like Bill Gates.
00:10:40.000 And I thought, if that's what you're complaining about, stop complaining.
00:10:44.000 If your complaint is that you're not Bill Gates, stop complaining because you're doing fine.
00:10:49.000 Because Bill Gates is probably complaining that he's not the head of Apple.
00:10:51.000 That's right.
00:10:52.000 Yeah.
00:10:56.000 I think the narrative string on this story has just run out, you know?
00:11:02.000 I mean, look, you know...
00:11:05.000 Somewhere at the end of this...
00:11:06.000 At the end of the string of this story, there's some transgender cat just playing with it.
00:11:12.000 You know, I love the fact that every fourth guy named Mohammed is chasing somebody around with a scimitar, trying to cut his head off.
00:11:18.000 But that tells us nothing about the religion of Islam, right?
00:11:22.000 We can't make any generalization about Islam from that fact.
00:11:26.000 But one psychopath, one crazy racist psychopath shoots people in Charleston, and that tells us everything you need to know about America.
00:11:36.000 Every time a Muslim kills somebody, we hear, well, most Muslims are peaceful.
00:11:40.000 One psychopath, white psychopath, kills some black people, and suddenly I'm a bad guy?
00:11:49.000 I just think it's playing out.
00:11:50.000 Yeah, well, I think it's better.
00:11:52.000 Again, that's where you pull out your Jew pass.
00:11:53.000 Of course, you're a Christian now.
00:11:55.000 You're like, ah, you've got Jewish in me.
00:11:57.000 You know, I've been discriminated against.
00:12:00.000 Well, I got the Irish thing going on.
00:12:02.000 No mix!
00:12:03.000 Yeah, well, no one likes the Irish fun dip.
00:12:05.000 That's justified.
00:12:06.000 I'm screwed.
00:12:06.000 Or movies.
00:12:09.000 This conversation took a weird turn.
00:12:12.000 It looks so earnest.
00:12:14.000 What happened?
00:12:16.000 Yeah, I don't know.
00:12:17.000 No, I think you're right, Clavin, and I think it's gotten to a point, and I'm seeing a turn culturally with younger people, but not fiscally.
00:12:24.000 Socialism is fine.
00:12:25.000 But culturally they're going, gosh, I mean, we're limiting ourselves and our ability simply to speak on anything.
00:12:32.000 And I feel like this is sort of emblematic of the left with the Spider-Man issue.
00:12:36.000 You know, instead of creating new characters, they want to complain about one and hijack it.
00:12:41.000 And I think political correctness – you can correct me if I'm wrong because you're the expert here with fiction.
00:12:44.000 I think political correctness has really sort of kneecapped creativity to the point that leftists are for the first time having a hard time creating new stories.
00:12:54.000 Am I wrong?
00:12:55.000 No, no, you're not wrong.
00:12:56.000 I mean, you know, this werewolf cop, not to plug the book too much, but when I brought it out, it has a character in it, a main character, who is politically incorrect and who's always pointing out that this one only got her job because she's a Latina and women shouldn't be doing this.
00:13:11.000 He said he's a terrible sexist.
00:13:13.000 He's not the hero, but he has this loud mouth thing.
00:13:15.000 Everything he says is, you know, it just has enough truth in it where you can't quite dismiss it, you know?
00:13:22.000 So it's very annoying to people who are politically correct.
00:13:25.000 That character alone kept the book from selling overseas in Europe.
00:13:29.000 In Europe, the fact that that character existed was just an absolute, he's done.
00:13:34.000 Does he have a son-in-law named Meathead?
00:13:38.000 He's not even that bad, you know?
00:13:40.000 I mean, he's just like a little over the edge.
00:13:42.000 And that's coming here, too.
00:13:44.000 I mean, that is going to start coming here, too, if we don't stop it.
00:13:47.000 The only difference here is as long as we've got the First Amendment, until John Roberts decides it doesn't mean what it says it means, as long as we've got the First Amendment, you know, I think there can always be somebody who'll create a new publishing house, a new movie company, that makes the movies that no one else will make, and overrides those protests.
00:14:06.000 And if you When you do that, I think you win.
00:14:08.000 Because people are hungry for it.
00:14:10.000 When you hear Jerry Seinfeld, Chris Rock, say they won't play college campuses anymore because in Rock's phrase, they're too conservative.
00:14:10.000 They're hungry for it.
00:14:19.000 What he meant was they're too leftist.
00:14:21.000 And they won't let them get past it.
00:14:23.000 George Carlin said this.
00:14:24.000 The daddy of them all said he wouldn't play college campuses.
00:14:31.000 I mean, look, we conservatives have said all along that leftism is fascism with a human face, but they didn't listen and now they're finding out.
00:14:45.000 I mean, what you also raise is a point that I think a lot of people miss.
00:14:49.000 And I've talked about this with Sargon of a cat and Milo Yiannopoulos over there in the UK, who's also super gay.
00:14:56.000 See, I was going to say what a good guy Milo is.
00:14:59.000 That's where I was going.
00:15:00.000 Yeah, no, he loves the V. He even always has to point it out.
00:15:04.000 Big fan of the wiener, that Milo.
00:15:06.000 What I think is Chris Rock doesn't realize he's now facing the monster that he has absolutely created.
00:15:13.000 That's right.
00:15:13.000 That's right.
00:15:14.000 None of them wants to grasp that nettle.
00:15:17.000 Nobody wants to say, like, oh, wait, this is us.
00:15:19.000 This is us censoring us.
00:15:21.000 Because guys like us, we don't care, obviously.
00:15:23.000 I mean, we wouldn't be talking to each other if we gave a rat, you know?
00:15:27.000 Yeah.
00:15:28.000 I mean, I always wonder why the feminists don't come after me more.
00:15:33.000 And I suddenly realize they know.
00:15:35.000 What are they going to do to me?
00:15:37.000 They're going to say, you're sexist.
00:15:38.000 Yes, I am.
00:15:39.000 That's true.
00:15:40.000 Let me hold the door for you.
00:15:43.000 Exactly.
00:15:43.000 And on your way out, please.
00:15:46.000 But, you know, I think that's the thing.
00:15:49.000 You know, the only people who can be censored here now are the people who care, whether you like them or not.
00:15:55.000 It's a good point.
00:15:55.000 I do think feminists might have some...
00:15:57.000 What they can do is get...
00:15:58.000 They're trying to get to your wife and have her take half.
00:16:01.000 That's what they're trying to do now.
00:16:03.000 I mean, it's a tough sell.
00:16:03.000 It's like...
00:16:08.000 Like, I was talking with my wife, and we've talked about this.
00:16:10.000 I've talked about sexism a lot on this program.
00:16:13.000 It's because you're a sexist.
00:16:15.000 I am sexist in a sense that I will never hit my wife.
00:16:21.000 What?
00:16:22.000 That's disgusting.
00:16:23.000 I know!
00:16:24.000 I treat her better than I treat any man.
00:16:27.000 And it's because she's a woman.
00:16:29.000 I mean, that's just sexism.
00:16:30.000 It's just on the positive side.
00:16:31.000 They want to be these cafeteria sexists, feminists, where they pick and they choose what they want.
00:16:36.000 And I talk about it a lot.
00:16:37.000 And it's a tough sell for a feminist...
00:16:39.000 Who's, you know, who's so unattractive that she has convinced herself a compliment is some kind of a microaggression to tell your beautiful wife or my beautiful wife that they should be ashamed to be with men who treat them like princesses.
00:16:52.000 It's a tough sell!
00:16:54.000 Yeah, I'm sure my wife is deeply ashamed of that.
00:16:55.000 My wife is just going to be ashamed to be with me.
00:16:57.000 Well, there is that.
00:16:58.000 I think we can all sides can unite on that.
00:17:01.000 Yes!
00:17:03.000 You're married to Fun Dip?
00:17:05.000 Why?!
00:17:06.000 What is wrong with you?
00:17:09.000 No, Clavin, I mean, listen, and you're right in there.
00:17:11.000 You're right in the belly of the beast as you do this.
00:17:14.000 You were talking about the Muslim thing.
00:17:15.000 Have you seen the polls that recently just came out on American Muslims?
00:17:18.000 25% think it's okay to kill Americans as long as – but only as long as it's in favor of jihad.
00:17:23.000 Right.
00:17:25.000 Not just randomly.
00:17:26.000 They're not going to randomly.
00:17:27.000 Oh, yeah.
00:17:29.000 It's not okay to kill them because you caught them on To Catch a Predator or something.
00:17:33.000 Let's give them a trial.
00:17:35.000 Oh, it's part of the jihad.
00:17:37.000 Oh, he drew a picture of Mohammed.
00:17:41.000 I also, you know, 50% on that poll were in favor of Sharia law.
00:17:47.000 And, you know, I think it's very important every time we mention Sharia law to say that it's an atrocity in and of itself.
00:17:47.000 51%.
00:17:53.000 I mean, the Western system of law is something, you know, remember those old pictures of like the ape evolving into the human being?
00:18:00.000 I mean, the Western system of law is at the very pinnacle of that process.
00:18:04.000 It's something that you had to come out of the swamps to get to that place and to hand that over in any area, as they sometimes do in France and in England, to Sharia, which is savage law, is despicable.
00:18:18.000 You are going to get letters, my friend.
00:18:23.000 I've been giving out your address for years.
00:18:27.000 Yes, I'm comparing Muslims to Australopithecuses on this subhuman chart.
00:18:32.000 Here's Stephen's address.
00:18:34.000 But is it Australopithecus bullseye?
00:18:39.000 Not Muslim.
00:18:39.000 Sharia.
00:18:40.000 Yeah, Sharia.
00:18:41.000 I get it, but it doesn't matter.
00:18:43.000 That's how it's going to be taken.
00:18:44.000 Okay, you know what?
00:18:45.000 We're going to end this for the radio side and keep you for the web exclusive.
00:18:48.000 Andrew Klavan.
00:18:49.000 Follow him on Twitter at Andrew Klavan Werewolf Cop.
00:18:51.000 Fantastic book.
00:18:52.000 If you are listening terrestrially, go to ladderwithcrowder.com for an extended uncut interview where he's incredibly profane and anti-Semitic.
00:18:58.000 We're off into uncharted territory.
00:19:00.000 Back with Andrew Klavan.
00:19:01.000 And you're off the air now, sir, so you don't need to worry about the FCC. Oh, boy.
00:19:04.000 Okay, so this is the f***ing podcast.
00:19:06.000 I can curse like Obama now.
00:19:08.000 I can start using racist terms like Obama.
00:19:11.000 Yeah.
00:19:12.000 Hey, that's great.
00:19:13.000 Yeah, you know, I think what happened is Barack Obama said, you know, he said, and then Biden said, that's a big deal.
00:19:20.000 So...
00:19:25.000 I'm not going to touch that joke.
00:19:26.000 Even off the air, I'm not touching that joke.
00:19:28.000 Oh, you know what?
00:19:29.000 Like, it's one of those things.
00:19:30.000 I was sitting there talking.
00:19:32.000 You know, I mean, Andrew, we talked about it.
00:19:33.000 I'm not really, like, a particularly profane guy.
00:19:35.000 I think that cussing tends to be a tool of the lazy, inherently, where, hey, that's why I use it so much.
00:19:42.000 Yeah, well, I mean, there's...
00:19:44.000 Slovenly, you know?
00:19:45.000 There are plenty of other indicators as to your laziness, fun dip, without the cussing coming out of your mouth.
00:19:51.000 But I do...
00:19:52.000 So I don't use it a lot, whereas my dad, like, he cusses so brilliantly.
00:19:57.000 It was used to punctuate a sentence where I'm going...
00:20:00.000 I mean, that's where language is a craft, you know?
00:20:03.000 But does he use the...
00:20:04.000 The French words...
00:20:06.000 The French cusses like your mom...
00:20:07.000 You were talking about how they cuss with things like Eucharist...
00:20:11.000 Yes.
00:20:12.000 Yes.
00:20:13.000 Chalice, tabernacle.
00:20:14.000 These are the worst.
00:20:15.000 We've talked about this, Andrew, haven't we?
00:20:16.000 Those are the worst cuss words in French.
00:20:18.000 No.
00:20:19.000 That's stupid.
00:20:20.000 It's hilarious.
00:20:22.000 Well, like in French Canadian, because, you know, it's the state denomination is Catholicism.
00:20:25.000 So, you know, I guess sort of blasphemy against the church is considered like using the Lord's name in vain.
00:20:30.000 So the worst word is tabernacle.
00:20:34.000 So, like, if you curse, you say, like, tabarnak!
00:20:36.000 Yes, yes, and you add it at the end of a phrase.
00:20:39.000 So it'll be like, you'd say, like, oh, ça marche pas, tabarnak!
00:20:42.000 That's the, like, you punctuate it.
00:20:43.000 And so then you have the influence on English Canadians, and Jared's gonna have the censor button raised, because my audience will be offended.
00:20:49.000 I'm like, okay, what's a language warning?
00:20:51.000 It's true, though, where you'll have English-speaking Canadians who will punctuate their sentence with a cuss word, so they'll be like, oh, the stupid soundboard's broken, f***!
00:21:02.000 And you're laughing, but Canadians don't even realize how silly it sounds.
00:21:05.000 Well, why don't they say the stupid soundboard's broken tabernacle?
00:21:10.000 I guess they have some level of pride to like...
00:21:12.000 They're trying to fit in.
00:21:13.000 They're trying to fit in.
00:21:17.000 They're bridging the multiculturalist gap.
00:21:22.000 We were talking about what?
00:21:23.000 Oh, the Islamic thing.
00:21:25.000 Yeah, the Sharia law is a gross abomination of anyone who...
00:21:29.000 if they want to be consistent in caring about human rights.
00:21:32.000 To me, that's one of the great sort of dichotomies of the left where I'm going, well, I mean, you hate Americans because they think that giving Bruce, Caitlyn Jenner, an ESPY is kind of silly.
00:21:41.000 I mean, that's the level of my hate.
00:21:42.000 I'm like, well, Caitlyn Jenner technically hasn't won anything.
00:21:45.000 It was Bruce.
00:21:46.000 Yeah, exactly.
00:21:47.000 And that enrages them.
00:21:49.000 But stoning a woman because she was raped, that's a culture.
00:21:53.000 Yeah, it's a cultural thing.
00:21:54.000 That's right.
00:21:56.000 See, I think what people are offended by now, or at least what I am offended by, what I think most of the conservatives I know, it's not, nobody cares what Bruce Jenner does with his body parts.
00:22:05.000 He can fling them out the car windows he drives down Main Street, as far as I'm concerned.
00:22:09.000 It's like, thank you, thank you.
00:22:11.000 Here's one for you.
00:22:11.000 Throwing them out like candy canes at a Santa parade.
00:22:14.000 Exactly.
00:22:15.000 But what I think people are really offended by is this notion that we have to join in not seeing reality.
00:22:15.000 Who cares?
00:22:25.000 In not seeing reality.
00:22:26.000 I'm a woman now.
00:22:27.000 I'm black.
00:22:29.000 Like Spider-Man.
00:22:30.000 It's like, I'm a spider.
00:22:32.000 Yeah, Spider-Man.
00:22:32.000 You're a spider, right?
00:22:34.000 Careful, Fund of Scott.
00:22:36.000 This is his thing.
00:22:37.000 My theory on the whole process is just accept people no matter how different they are, as long as they're not cutting people's heads off and, you know, blowing buildings up.
00:22:48.000 Well, I have almost the same philosophy.
00:22:50.000 I might just mock people relentlessly no matter how different they are.
00:22:55.000 Yeah, no, exactly.
00:22:57.000 I mean, my whole thing is with...
00:22:58.000 See, this is what happens.
00:22:59.000 We've gotten off on another tangent, and Fundip's going to...
00:23:01.000 Oh my gosh, this is Louder with Crowder, and we're off on a tangent.
00:23:04.000 I know.
00:23:05.000 My issue is this, Andrew, and I talk with Fundip about this.
00:23:10.000 People, if it is, I mean it is classified technically as a psychiatric disorder, medically.
00:23:16.000 So is my morbid obesity.
00:23:19.000 That's not classified as psychiatric.
00:23:21.000 That's classified as physical.
00:23:23.000 No, but I mean something in here is causing it.
00:23:28.000 Lack of self-respect?
00:23:30.000 Self-restraint?
00:23:32.000 I don't know.
00:23:33.000 Well, my point is this.
00:23:34.000 People who suffer from any kind of condition, let's call it, depression, social anxiety, schizophrenia, any of those, are generally the last people to recognize it.
00:23:45.000 Now, when we tell those people, hey, listen, you suffer from depression, let us help you, recognizing it and saying let's help you with steps A, B, and C is not hateful.
00:23:56.000 And the people who say, hey, you know what, I think, like Milo Yiannopoulos, I think this might be better treated through therapy and through counseling than a surgical procedure that comes with so many complications, you know, John Hopkins won't perform it.
00:24:09.000 My therapist said, I give up!
00:24:13.000 And said, don't bother coming.
00:24:15.000 I'm making an actual point here.
00:24:16.000 My point is that's not any more hateful than just saying, okay, you're a woman.
00:24:21.000 And so my problem is applying intent to someone saying, well, you know what?
00:24:24.000 The science is out.
00:24:25.000 Most of the science is in and you can't change your sex.
00:24:29.000 It's not hateful for someone to say, hey, well, let's try and help you with this.
00:24:32.000 Let me try and help you accept who you were born to be as opposed to just saying, well, let's accept all of it.
00:24:38.000 And you're told that one is hateful and one is loving and that's the narrative.
00:24:42.000 And that's what bothers me.
00:24:43.000 Well, that's the only way, when you have a narrative that is essentially false, and not everything the left says is false, but a lot of what they say is false.
00:24:50.000 If you have a narrative that is essentially false, the only way to sell it is by keeping the guy who's saying the emperor isn't wearing any clothes from saying the emperor isn't wearing any clothes.
00:24:59.000 And the only way to do that is to say, oh, that's a hateful thing to say.
00:25:02.000 To say that the emperor is naked, you know, just because he happens not to have a stitch of clothing on, that's hateful, that's evil.
00:25:08.000 And if you can intimidate people into saying that, then the emperor is dressed, you know?
00:25:12.000 You know, I identify as a dressed person, the emperor said, you know.
00:25:16.000 I never looked at it from that perspective.
00:25:19.000 Using a fable to connect it is helpful.
00:25:23.000 Well, that's how you become a fiction writer and throw your life away like this.
00:25:28.000 You bastard, you're wrecking my life!
00:25:30.000 And that's how Fundip...
00:25:32.000 The cards come crumbling down!
00:25:34.000 That's how Fundip looks at himself in the mirror completely naked and says, I'm clothed.
00:25:39.000 Actually, I'm not wearing anything right now.
00:25:42.000 That's amazing ink work, Fun Dip.
00:25:45.000 Yeah, yeah, this is a hell of a tattoo of Spider-Man on my chest.
00:25:48.000 This is true, of gay, biracial, Latino Spider-Man.
00:25:52.000 That's the new rule.
00:25:54.000 And this is something, Andrew, I think that there's a lot of headway to be made with people who aren't inherently conservative.
00:25:59.000 There is a rebound effect, I think, with the free speech issue.
00:26:03.000 And that's why I'm always interested to see as someone who works in writing specifically, which is, to me, I mean, it's the pinnacle of free speech.
00:26:09.000 In stand-up comedy, I think, you know, it's at the forefront of that.
00:26:13.000 What about reading the weather on the radio?
00:26:16.000 No, I don't think so much.
00:26:18.000 Comedy is where you push the boundaries.
00:26:20.000 There's no question about it.
00:26:21.000 Comedy is where people say things that are purposely out there and are kind of the thing.
00:26:27.000 Comedy exists sort of in that part of the brain that is thinking what you're not supposed to be thinking, which we all have, and you bring that out.
00:26:34.000 It's funny, but if you get stoned for it, it loses a little bit of it.
00:26:40.000 But if you get stoned first and then you go see the comic, that's better.
00:26:44.000 Then it's hilarious.
00:26:45.000 Then it's teaching Chong.
00:26:47.000 That's right.
00:26:48.000 Well, it's actually a perfect example.
00:26:49.000 Tommy Chong used to be so funny until he became such an activist for pot.
00:26:53.000 It was like, well, it's funny when you're doing it in an old Chevy and you're joking about it and the people watching it are stoned.
00:27:01.000 But once you start pushing for legislation, pot's not fun anymore.
00:27:05.000 Legislation isn't fun.
00:27:06.000 You know, since we're going off on tangents, it actually brings us back to the question of language, of four-letter words like tabernacle.
00:27:15.000 Was that it?
00:27:16.000 Yeah, that's the bad word, yeah.
00:27:22.000 No, I mean, this is really interesting.
00:27:24.000 I think Jerry Seinfeld said this, and I hope I'm not attributing it to the wrong person.
00:27:28.000 He said, if you curse and people laugh, you might be funny.
00:27:31.000 But if you don't curse and people laugh, you actually, you know you're funny.
00:27:34.000 And I've seen this a million times.
00:27:37.000 When you talk about saying the thing...
00:27:38.000 It's just out there that you're not supposed to say.
00:27:41.000 The easiest thing to say is a four-letter word, and then people laugh and they giggle because you've exposed that thing.
00:27:46.000 A harder thing to do is to bring out that idea that you're not supposed to be thinking, that politically incorrect or socially incorrect idea, and bring that out and expose people for it.
00:27:59.000 It's very funny.
00:28:00.000 And I think, you know, it's interesting.
00:28:02.000 I watch Louis C.K. It's fascinating to me that the guy, to me, he's 50-50.
00:28:08.000 50% of his material that's virtually clean is hilarious.
00:28:12.000 The minute he gets off on sex, it's not that I don't think he can be funny, but I still think he is.
00:28:16.000 Well, you know, it's funny you say that because we're actually going to have Jim Norton on, who's just a great guy overall.
00:28:21.000 And he's, I mean, as filthy as comedy gets, but he also doesn't use the F word as a crutch.
00:28:25.000 And I will say this.
00:28:26.000 I mean, Jerry Seinfeld is a great example.
00:28:28.000 A clean comic, but you have HuffPo writers rebutting him and protesting him.
00:28:32.000 And he's clean.
00:28:32.000 You know, they're not protesting Mark Maron.
00:28:34.000 They're not protesting Louis C.K. or these filthy comics.
00:28:36.000 They're protesting Jerry Seinfeld.
00:28:38.000 Just like I was banned from college multicultural affairs.
00:28:41.000 I mean, at this point, I didn't even say ass in my act.
00:28:44.000 It was as clean as humanly possible.
00:28:46.000 Yeah, but the miniskirt was just going to...
00:28:48.000 The miniskirt.
00:28:49.000 It made people uncomfortable, Grant.
00:28:50.000 It was the next Eddie Izzard.
00:28:52.000 Yeah, exactly.
00:28:53.000 But the issue...
00:28:55.000 So Jim Norton is actually a great example.
00:28:56.000 He's dirty, but he doesn't use cussing as a crutch.
00:29:01.000 And I say that because you see the same thing with hip-hop.
00:29:02.000 And I say this as a great fan of hip-hop.
00:29:04.000 But hip-hop is very much you're using language as an instrument, okay?
00:29:08.000 Okay.
00:29:09.000 And it's also mathematical in that, okay, here's this verse.
00:29:13.000 This verse needs to match in some kind of a sequence with syllables, right?
00:29:18.000 So I need eight syllables.
00:29:20.000 Well, gosh, I need to fill in one F word.
00:29:23.000 I need to fill in two F-ing or F-er.
00:29:26.000 I need four mother F-er.
00:29:27.000 That's what happens.
00:29:28.000 So it's a lot easier to go like, man, none of these verses work.
00:29:32.000 Motherfucker!
00:29:33.000 I got it!
00:29:34.000 I got this!
00:29:34.000 Grammy!
00:29:37.000 And I don't hear a lot of other people say it.
00:29:39.000 It comes to be lazy songwriting.
00:29:41.000 Of course it is.
00:29:42.000 I mean, you can tell the difference.
00:29:43.000 I mean, David Mamet, who is famous for using the F word, like, you know, he continues to spill these.
00:29:48.000 He does it with this beautiful poetry, and when he's on his game, it is really funny and intense, you know, and it's just like he's talking about the way men talk, you know, and that's great, you know, but you're right.
00:30:00.000 If you throw it in, it just loses everything.
00:30:01.000 I love how with David Mamet, everyone just thought he was sort of subversive and they thought he was cutting edge until he came out as a conservative and then everything he'd ever done was actually sexist.
00:30:10.000 It was terrible, you know?
00:30:11.000 I mean, the funny thing is, I mean, he was an anti-feminist from the start.
00:30:15.000 I think that was his way in.
00:30:18.000 That's what kind of opened his eyes to it.
00:30:19.000 I mean, he says it was like Jewish stuff and all this.
00:30:22.000 But if you go back to his place, his depictions of women, even I was sitting there going like, whoa, you know, that's stupid, you know?
00:30:29.000 Yeah.
00:30:30.000 Was this written in Iran?
00:30:33.000 Is Soraya M going to show up somewhere here?
00:30:36.000 Have you ever seen that movie?
00:30:37.000 Yeah, are you kidding?
00:30:38.000 Sure.
00:30:40.000 It's not a pleasant watch.
00:30:41.000 It's like a musical, you know?
00:30:43.000 I'm waiting for the musical to come out, you know?
00:30:48.000 I mean, it's funny.
00:30:50.000 Cyrus, the guy who made the film, is a good friend of mine.
00:30:54.000 And it's a beautiful movie, and it really is.
00:30:56.000 But right after it came out, I was sitting in a bar, and I looked over, and there he was, sitting next to me, kind of staring into his drink.
00:31:02.000 drink and I said, I said, let me guess, people don't want to go out on Saturday night and watch a woman get stoned to death.
00:31:09.000 After all, you have to remind people, movies are things you do on dates, you know, so whenever you write a movie, you have to sort of think to yourself, hey, honey, want to go see a movie about a woman being stoned to death?
00:31:21.000 Right.
00:31:21.000 Yeah, I don't know, can we see the one about the girl who never gets old, you know?
00:31:26.000 Yeah, I used to manage a movie theater and when we were showing the passion of the christ I never saw date couples coming in for it.
00:31:36.000 It was always large, like, church groups organized coming in.
00:31:40.000 And my...
00:31:41.000 The floors!
00:31:43.000 I've never seen so much Kleenex.
00:31:45.000 Oh, yeah.
00:31:46.000 Well, that's because you've never been to a theater where Pee Wee Herman was caught.
00:31:49.000 Oh!
00:31:50.000 Oh, wow.
00:31:53.000 But yeah, do you say to your girlfriend, honey, you want to go watch the Son of God have his back ripped off?
00:31:59.000 Well, I do have an issue with that.
00:32:01.000 They ignore the happy ending.
00:32:04.000 Yeah, except he did it so fast.
00:32:06.000 It's funny, the first thing I said, I saw it alone.
00:32:09.000 I'm sitting in a packed theater.
00:32:10.000 I sit next to a stranger.
00:32:12.000 That resurrection scene is so quick, I actually turned to the guy when the lights came up and I said, you know, the book had a happy ending.
00:32:19.000 Yeah!
00:32:20.000 I put the ranch cheddar powder on my popcorn and I missed it.
00:32:26.000 Because, I mean, they rip the poor man to shreds and then it's like, bang, you know?
00:32:32.000 Mill is not a happy dude.
00:32:33.000 No, he's not.
00:32:35.000 Well, you bring up the popcorn, Stephen, and I'll tell you another thing about The Passion of the Christ.
00:32:40.000 That was the lowest sales for snacks out of any movie I ever showed there.
00:32:46.000 Was it really?
00:32:47.000 Nobody was buying snacks.
00:32:49.000 Nobody was going, I gotta get me a big bag of popcorn and a box of goobers to go in and watch that.
00:32:55.000 They went in, they didn't buy soda, they didn't buy anything.
00:32:58.000 That explains why they didn't make the sequel.
00:33:03.000 We're not selling popcorn here.
00:33:05.000 Yeah, and the sequel is just the happy part, and I don't think Will Gibson wants to do that.
00:33:09.000 I mean, you could always come back with Revelations.
00:33:11.000 That would make a hell of a movie.
00:33:13.000 You know, if anybody else, if any other subject had made that kind of money, there'd be a sequel every month.
00:33:18.000 I mean, talk about remaking Spider-Man.
00:33:20.000 If anything but a Christian movie had made that kind of profit, I mean, it cost $25 million.
00:33:26.000 It's made like a billion or something at this point.
00:33:28.000 Any other subject that would be like, can we make Jesus too?
00:33:32.000 Is there, you know...
00:33:33.000 This time, it's personal.
00:33:39.000 Yeah, exactly.
00:33:41.000 This time, Chris Hemsworth is Christ.
00:33:45.000 Chris, tell us about your workout routine for this.
00:33:48.000 I did a lot of carpentry, and then I tried to learn an American accent where I just exaggerated my words, and I suck at it.
00:33:58.000 It's because he's the most handsome human being on Earth.
00:34:01.000 No, that's John Barrowman.
00:34:03.000 John Barrowman.
00:34:04.000 Yeah.
00:34:05.000 Expect me to be helping fund it with that closet door any day now.
00:34:10.000 The thing that bothers me, and I talk about...
00:34:12.000 I think everybody's got one on a list, right?
00:34:15.000 Uh, no.
00:34:16.000 What's he talking about, Stephen?
00:34:18.000 I have no idea who he's talking about, Hugh Jackman.
00:34:21.000 I, uh...
00:34:24.000 No, my issue is this, and a lot of people, I mean, you work on set with enough actors, and I have too.
00:34:30.000 The steroid thing is so rampant, and nobody wants to talk about it.
00:34:34.000 And I go, okay, well, let me give you an idea.
00:34:36.000 Like, well, did you really think that this guy did steroids?
00:34:38.000 Okay.
00:34:41.000 Christian Bale couldn't do one push-up when he went from the Machinist to the Dark Knight.
00:34:46.000 And then he was 220 and lean.
00:34:48.000 As someone who's trained my entire life, who walks around at two and a quarter, who has a 54-year-old father who is in the top single-digit percentile of people in his age bracket for strength, I know what it takes.
00:34:59.000 Now, let me give you kind of the timeline.
00:35:02.000 Most people who are in Hollywood were drama geeks.
00:35:06.000 They were theater nerds, right?
00:35:08.000 And they decided they wanted to go to Hollywood and make it as creative types.
00:35:11.000 Only now you have to turn the drama geek into Superman.
00:35:14.000 So that requires a lot of chemical enhancement.
00:35:18.000 You have some exceptions, but these tend to not be the absolute best of the best athletes who are playing superheroes.
00:35:26.000 It's a stretch.
00:35:28.000 And when you see someone go, well, you know, I just started eating right and I put on 30 pounds of muscle in three months.
00:35:33.000 That's a lot of playing stage.
00:35:38.000 You're telling me that Chris Hemworth's testicles are the size of BB's.
00:35:41.000 Is that what you're talking about?
00:35:44.000 He's walking around with Simon Birchballs.
00:35:48.000 That's what I'm saying.
00:35:49.000 Well, not necessarily him, but yeah, I mean, even him, if you look at him, like, at his top weight, you know, he weighed about 210.
00:35:54.000 That's not that big.
00:35:56.000 And it's just, again, it's the whole sort of house of cards that is the entertainment industry.
00:36:00.000 And I saw, like, Dwayne The Rock Johnson.
00:36:03.000 Yes.
00:36:04.000 I remember laughing so hard, where they asked him point-blank about steroids.
00:36:08.000 But he actually is an athlete.
00:36:09.000 But he goes, well, you know...
00:36:11.000 He's not an actor.
00:36:12.000 He goes, I tried them once in college, and they weren't for me.
00:36:14.000 Yeah.
00:36:15.000 We didn't inhale.
00:36:18.000 Yeah, exactly.
00:36:19.000 Everyone goes through a second puberty when they're 44.
00:36:26.000 Well, he wasn't even that big in his pro wrestling days.
00:36:30.000 You know what I mean?
00:36:30.000 Like, all of a sudden, he's 40-something, and he puts on another 20 pounds of muscle.
00:36:34.000 I mean, you know how the human body ages.
00:36:36.000 Sorry, we got off on a tangent.
00:36:37.000 That's kind of what happens.
00:36:40.000 But my point is just, it's a fake industry, and then these people come out, and they want us to adopt their political views, I guess.
00:36:45.000 That is the funny thing about it, because it's supposed to be a fake.
00:36:51.000 To be better looking than us.
00:36:52.000 The women are more beautiful and men are heroic.
00:36:55.000 Get it.
00:36:55.000 Those are the stories we want to go see.
00:36:57.000 But why are we listening to them when they start talking about reality?
00:37:01.000 You know, you just think the reporter would say, thank you.
00:37:04.000 Like, fold up his notebook.
00:37:07.000 You just keep talking, Ben, and I'll be back when you start telling me.
00:37:13.000 Tell me, don't got Batman.
00:37:14.000 I'll come back.
00:37:15.000 Keep speaking, Mr.
00:37:16.000 Renner.
00:37:17.000 I got some stuff in Uganda I have to cover.
00:37:19.000 Occasionally you'll get somebody that is aware and is intelligent, that's an actor that does something really good with their life, and then they serve two terms, and then you're followed up by a bush.
00:37:34.000 I mean, actors are just...
00:37:36.000 Listen, I admire actors.
00:37:37.000 They are amazing.
00:37:38.000 What they do is amazing.
00:37:39.000 And you almost never see a bad performance in an American movie.
00:37:43.000 I don't know how much of that happens in the editing room, but it is an amazing thing that our movie actors are...
00:37:47.000 Have you not seen a Will Ferrell film?
00:37:51.000 They all suck.
00:37:53.000 No, no.
00:37:54.000 Have you seen his Hamlet?
00:37:55.000 It was heartbreaking.
00:37:58.000 It was heartbreaking.
00:38:00.000 For my money, no one does a better Hamlet than Farrell.
00:38:04.000 I think...
00:38:05.000 Wait, that's an omelet.
00:38:07.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:38:09.000 Fundip just hates him because he's part of that frat pack and he gets compared to Chris Farley a lot and it brings up bad memories.
00:38:15.000 All of those guys are annoying.
00:38:17.000 Oh, come on, Fundip.
00:38:19.000 Seriously?
00:38:20.000 You don't need to be so bitter.
00:38:21.000 Why?
00:38:22.000 If I'm not bitter, who's going to do it?
00:38:26.000 Somebody has to be the bitter guy.
00:38:28.000 Your wife.
00:38:29.000 She's married to you.
00:38:29.000 Let her do it.
00:38:30.000 Well, that would make anybody bitter, but she's just like all sweet all the time.
00:38:34.000 That's a serious problem.
00:38:36.000 She's got a character flaw.
00:38:37.000 So, Andrew, I'm trying to think of how we can right this ship.
00:38:42.000 I don't think there's a way to...
00:38:43.000 It's sinking.
00:38:44.000 It's sinking.
00:38:45.000 Wait, the ship of the show?
00:38:48.000 I forget.
00:38:50.000 What ship are you referring to?
00:38:51.000 The nation or the show?
00:38:53.000 That's the question.
00:38:54.000 You know, I guess I don't know.
00:38:55.000 I mean, I'm turning to Andrew Clayton.
00:38:56.000 Let me ask you this.
00:38:57.000 Okay, we talk about this, and I joke about it a lot.
00:38:59.000 But you're, you know, born Jewish, and you're a Christian.
00:39:02.000 You're a convert.
00:39:03.000 How much crap do you get for that?
00:39:05.000 Because they don't lose a lot of team players.
00:39:07.000 No, they don't lose a lot of team players.
00:39:09.000 You know, it's funny.
00:39:11.000 I get a certain amount of it.
00:39:12.000 In fact, somebody on my website called me a blithering idiot just the other day.
00:39:17.000 I wanted to say, like, I almost never blither.
00:39:19.000 What are you talking about?
00:39:21.000 An idiot, yes, but I never...
00:39:22.000 You know, I get it on my blog at PJ Media when I make Christian points.
00:39:29.000 I was very moved by the Charleston, the family of the Charleston victims coming out and forgiving the killer.
00:39:35.000 And I was talking about what a beautiful moment that was in a moment that reminds us of what The whole thing is supposed to be about, you know, that it actually is a different way of looking at the world in a way that was...
00:39:45.000 No one ever saw the world like that before, Christ, and I was talking about the beauty of that.
00:39:51.000 A couple of people showed up and said, you know, like, you stupid ex...
00:39:51.000 And that...
00:39:57.000 If you knew what suffering was, you wouldn't...
00:40:00.000 That's actually very kind, just like stupid ex-Jew, considering I'm not Jewish in any way, shape, or form, and I get called a Jew fag every day.
00:40:08.000 You know what?
00:40:09.000 Well, the second half.
00:40:12.000 You know where the anti-Semites seem to congregate?
00:40:15.000 You can explain this to me.
00:40:17.000 YouTube.
00:40:18.000 I do a lot of YouTube videos.
00:40:20.000 I did those on the culture and the revolting truth.
00:40:22.000 And you go down the line, and there's always three, this is hilarious, this is great, this is...
00:40:27.000 Jew!
00:40:30.000 It's always like the fourth or fifth guy, you know?
00:40:32.000 I can never figure out why...
00:40:34.000 I've never been able to figure out anti-Semitism anyway.
00:40:39.000 Every Jewish person I've ever met, aside from one guy who used to do a radio show that I had to produce, has been super, super nice.
00:40:48.000 Oh, they're delightful people.
00:40:49.000 I mean, I grew up among them.
00:40:51.000 But I don't understand why has the world...
00:40:54.000 Hated this one particular group.
00:40:57.000 Because they brought God into the world.
00:41:00.000 It's like they hate that.
00:41:02.000 Well, that is pretty annoying.
00:41:04.000 They're knocking on the door like a...
00:41:06.000 Because before that, it was all, you know, it was all leftists before.
00:41:10.000 That's a good point.
00:41:11.000 I really do believe that, actually.
00:41:13.000 I really do believe that the underlying hatred, even among Christian, even that Christian anti-Semitism, is the underlying hatred.
00:41:22.000 Which is pretty rare, to be fair.
00:41:24.000 Christian anti-Semitism.
00:41:25.000 Now it is.
00:41:26.000 But for a thousand years it wasn't.
00:41:26.000 Now it is, yes.
00:41:28.000 Like in the 40s?
00:41:30.000 No, it was bad.
00:41:31.000 Yeah, it was bad.
00:41:31.000 In Europe, it was bad.
00:41:33.000 No, I'll give you that.
00:41:34.000 The thing I love about Americans is Americans are not, American Christians are not anti-Semitic.
00:41:39.000 So they're always like, How come you guys are angry at us?
00:41:42.000 It's like, well, it was a thousand years before you.
00:41:45.000 I mean, listen, I like you guys, like you're good people, but could you stop being so damn Jew-y all the time?
00:41:51.000 I like the Jew, just not so Jew-y.
00:41:55.000 Not too much.
00:41:57.000 It's the best-looking women, too, though.
00:42:00.000 Hot women, especially in Israel.
00:42:01.000 Oh, my God.
00:42:02.000 God!
00:42:03.000 They have a name for them.
00:42:05.000 I can't remember.
00:42:06.000 It's a fruit that's prickly on the outside but soft on the inside.
00:42:09.000 And that's what they're supposed to represent Jewish women.
00:42:12.000 And I have to say, they are something else.
00:42:14.000 I do not appreciate your potty mouth.
00:42:18.000 Where did I go wrong?
00:42:20.000 Oh, come on.
00:42:20.000 We know your euphemism with your fruit and your insides.
00:42:25.000 I've read Songs of Solomon, sir.
00:42:27.000 I was getting a little hot there, I think.
00:42:30.000 I tell you what, that's a real statement because you've got Funnip on a screen in front of you.
00:42:37.000 Yeah, if you can get hot and flustered while I'm on the visual.
00:42:42.000 He's found his happy place.
00:42:44.000 That's it.
00:42:45.000 He has found his happy place.
00:42:47.000 Andrew, we could have you on forever, but the fact is we need to have you back on.
00:42:51.000 Please.
00:42:52.000 Before we say something that we're going to regret, what the fuck would we say?
00:42:57.000 Way, way, way past that point.
00:42:59.000 Yeah, I think we've kind of hit that point.
00:43:02.000 Okay, so where can people best find you?
00:43:04.000 Werewolf Cop, obviously.
00:43:06.000 Read it.
00:43:06.000 Buy it.
00:43:07.000 Please go on Amazon and get Werewolf Cop.
00:43:09.000 Go on, as you said, Andrew Klavan is my Twitter feed, and you can also go on andrewklavan.com and see all my links.
00:43:15.000 What formats is it available in?
00:43:17.000 Hardcover, softcover, Kindle, audiobook?
00:43:20.000 Hardcover, Kindle, and audiobook.
00:43:20.000 What do you got?
00:43:22.000 The paperback is not out yet.
00:43:24.000 Next audiobook, you should have me do it.
00:43:26.000 I did it.
00:43:27.000 I did it myself.
00:43:27.000 Oh, well, you can't be beaten there.
00:43:30.000 You know, we're going to end this on a positive note.
00:43:32.000 No, never.
00:43:34.000 And then you just do...
00:43:35.000 I'm sorry, Andrew.
00:43:37.000 I just...
00:43:38.000 Hey, I'm a whore.
00:43:39.000 I admit it.
00:43:40.000 You can't make it up to me.
00:43:42.000 I'm sorry.
00:43:42.000 I can't make it up to you.
00:43:44.000 I tell you what.
00:43:45.000 Hold your anti-Semitic comments for only the Jewish half of Andrew Klavan.
00:43:50.000 And hold all your anti-fat comments for Stephen's ass.
00:43:57.000 I feel so soiled from being here.
00:44:00.000 I know!
00:44:00.000 This is a terrible sign-off.
00:44:02.000 Fun dip, stop it.
00:44:03.000 Andrew Klavan on Twitter, Werewolf Cop.
00:44:05.000 Go buy it, and we'll have him back someday once he can clean himself from the stench of the show.
00:44:13.000 Fun Dip, do not say anything.
00:44:14.000 Ladder with Crowder.
00:44:15.000 Stop it, stop it, stop it, stop it.
00:44:17.000 Ladder with Crowder.
00:44:17.000 I almost said Fun Dip, Dan.
00:44:19.000 Oh my God, you're ruining my life.
00:44:20.000 Ladder with Crowder.
00:44:21.000 We'll be right back.
00:44:22.000 Hey, if you like this interview with Andrew Klavan, there's something wrong with you, but you might enjoy these interviews with other guests, or I don't know what's playing.
00:44:28.000 Maybe it's a short web video.
00:44:30.000 Those are more easily digestible.
00:44:32.000 They're two minutes.
00:44:32.000 You don't need to think too much.