Guru Crowder is back and better than ever, and the boys are here to tell you all about it. This week, the boys talk about how they got into the business of podcasting, how they met, and what it's like to be a podcaster. Plus, they talk about the new Star Wars movie Star Wars: Galaxy of Heroes.
00:02:51.000Honestly, if they could, they should, you know how they always have a product that they sell to like a professional market and then they sell it to a consumer market?
00:03:44.000And of course, you can send in your requests, your letters at toughlove at louderwithcrowder.com.
00:03:50.000We finally have that email going because at first it was like life advice, and then we realized it always ended up being unnecessarily mean.
00:05:20.000Are expecting for our first time, and we are really excited, it's early proof that everything works.
00:05:26.000Sorry, it's early, but proof that everything works, which is reassuring.
00:05:29.000I always keep in mind, I always get shadows on a specific page here.
00:05:32.000As a preparing first time father, what can I do to quiet the insecurities as they get louder and louder in my head and I feel like I'm going to fail my budding family?
00:05:44.000I feel like those insecurities stem from the fact that I was raised mostly by my grandmothers at a young age.
00:05:49.000Sorry, I mean, obviously, good on your grandmothers, but I know that can be tough for a young man.
00:05:52.000I had very little interaction with my dad as he was a trucker, and my parents divorced when I was seven, with my mom taking primary custody.
00:05:58.000I've had very few positive male role models in my younger years.
00:06:02.000It's also tough as I see a lot of my father in me and his supposed suicide weighs on my conscience as I don't want to follow in those footsteps.
00:06:23.000And I know easier said than done because believe me, like the last time I got nothing right going through the McDonald's drive through when I was with kiddos, I mean, I considered it because I'm always carrying, but it would be a mess.
00:06:36.000My whole detailing membership had lapsed.
00:08:31.000There is, and you're obviously trying to work on yourself and your Christian walk.
00:08:34.000I will say, you know, this kind of goes back to generic advice, which is always kind of focus on those things that you can control.
00:08:41.000I will say this if you are worried about who you are as a person in combination with everything else here, that means you're probably a more decent person than people who aren't.
00:08:55.000At some point, they have been worried about that or asked themselves that.
00:08:58.000I know certainly Gerald, myself, and the friends that we're close with, we've all had those conversations, especially if you're in a position of authority where you have to make decisions.
00:09:06.000Like, for example, no one I know likes firing anybody.
00:09:10.000But sometimes it has to be done, and you really, really want to make sure that you are making the right decision.
00:09:15.000So, questioning your judgment is indicative of better judgment itself.
00:09:21.000There was something else I was looking at here.
00:09:23.000Very few files are done, but I want to know the direct actions I can take to pull me out of those thoughts.
00:09:30.000As far as insecurity, I don't know if you're just talking about suicidal thoughts or if you're talking about your ability as a father.
00:09:38.000And the truth is, I think every man, Gerald, you can tell me if I'm speaking out of turn, every man has those thoughts.
00:09:44.000And I think more men have those thoughts now because the lines aren't so clearly defined as to what the expectations are.
00:09:52.000And I mean, I know I went through this fear.
00:09:54.000That's why I didn't have children younger.
00:09:56.000And if I was in a different situation where I wasn't afraid of having to be, you know, run a company and be Mr. Mom, it would have been very different.
00:10:02.000But societally, you're told your life ends and, you know, kiss everything else goodbye.
00:10:06.000And at that point, I was working sometimes 16 hour days and I just thought it wouldn't be fair until I. Realize that's not how it used to be.
00:10:12.000It used to be you each take your share and you each have jobs and roles.
00:10:16.000So I would say your wife needs to be included in this.
00:10:19.000First and foremost, focus on disciplining your mind, body, spirit across the board.
00:10:26.000Creating a framework for yourself, for your life, helps keep everything in line because there's a consistent but a healthy self evaluation, not narcissism.
00:10:35.000It really is I hate to use the term holistic, though I am a guru, a holistic approach because that just better disciplines you across the board.
00:10:44.000And then I would enlist your wife and talk about these things and what your roles are and who's going to be doing what.
00:10:52.000Maybe even drafting up like a whiteboard, something for men, sometimes knowing exactly where responsibility falls gives you the ability to throw yourself into yours a little more effectively.