Louder with Crowder - LIVE FACT-CHECK! Biden’s First State of the Union | Louder with Crowder

00:00:00.000 Do not attempt the training techniques you are about to see without consulting a professional.

00:00:21.000 Previously on Crowder 911... I don't think Joe Biden knows what he's doing.

00:00:26.000 A physically inappropriate politician... He's at the point where he gropes every person that walks by.

00:00:32.000 This Joe Biden was clearly out of control.

00:00:35.000 That's not good.

00:00:39.000 Since Crowder last helped train former Vice President Joe Biden,

00:00:48.000 he's fallen back into some bad habits.

00:00:52.000 Yeah, the meth has worked at first, but former Vice President Joe Biden definitely regressed.

00:00:57.000 He's sniffing people a whole lot less, but he's gotten more handsy, and recently he's been pooping on all the carpets. 0.96

00:01:05.000 Sucks to clean up, it really does.

00:01:06.000 And when you walk with no shoes, and you get it between your toes, it's the worst thing ever.

00:01:10.000 When we last left Carter Black and his former Vice President Joe Biden, I taught them how to set boundaries in a calm, assertive state, and keep it from escalating.

00:01:20.000 But it seems they haven't kept the rules of no talk, no touch, no eye contact, and so former Vice President Biden regressed into an aggressive state.

00:01:34.000 Thanks for coming in.

00:01:35.000 Doing good.

00:01:36.000 Well, we've been working with the former vice president here, and he's been sniffing people a lot less, which is good.

00:01:40.000 That's good.

00:01:41.000 But since we made the decision to bring him inside, he's been just pooping on all of our carpets.

00:01:46.000 Wow.

00:01:46.000 We don't know what to do.

00:01:47.000 Okay.

00:01:47.000 That's the problem.

00:01:49.000 He's making for the... Hey!

00:01:50.000 Hey! 0.99

00:01:52.000 Hey! 0.99

00:01:54.000 Like that.

00:01:54.000 Yes, just like that.

00:01:56.000 On the carpet.

00:01:57.000 He's not even doing it on the wood.

00:01:59.000 No, he seems deliberate.

00:02:01.000 Okay, that's right.

00:02:02.000 Oh man, I needed to sit down with Coyote Black to get to the root cause of this negative behavior. 1.00

00:02:10.000 Okay, so Coyote Black, how long has it been happening like that?

00:02:14.000 Several months now.

00:02:15.000 Actually, it's been a year.

00:02:17.000 Okay.

00:02:17.000 It's getting pretty bad.

00:02:18.000 And that's the main problem, is the poop on the carpet.

00:02:23.000 Yeah, we have small children around, so that's a concern.

00:02:26.000 Yes, get serious.

00:02:28.000 Now, how old is former Vice President Joe Biden now?

00:02:32.000 He's 92.

00:02:33.000 Okay, now sometimes with older former vice presidents, it's important to remember that pooping on the carpet

00:02:41.000 is not always their fault.

00:02:42.000 He's not have awareness of time or space.

00:02:47.000 When he's escalate, he could be on the carpet or he could be on Mars.

00:02:52.000 Right now he's saying, this is my carpet.

00:02:57.000 I can poop on your carpet, that's make your carpet my carpet. 1.00

00:03:01.000 So what you're saying is all these issues he's been having is...

00:03:04.000 It's because of me.

00:03:05.000 It's my fault.

00:03:06.000 That's right.

00:03:09.000 Does not feel good.

00:03:11.000 No.

00:03:12.000 The good news is I can help to fix Snap the Brain Auto.

00:03:18.000 I hope so.

00:03:20.000 I'm excited.

00:03:21.000 I'm excited.

00:03:21.000 I hope we can get it fixed.

00:03:23.000 Good.

00:03:23.000 If not, I'm going to put him down though.

00:03:24.000 That's right.

00:03:25.000 Okay, now I just need that behavior test.

00:03:28.000 Hey! Hey! No! Hey! 1.00

00:03:30.000 You have to go outside.

00:03:32.000 You want some of that? Is that good?

00:03:46.000 Joe?

00:03:46.000 Hey, Joe?

00:03:47.000 You did a good job out there.

00:03:49.000 Alright.

00:03:50.000 Here you go.

00:03:52.000 Thank you.

00:03:53.000 Yeah, that's right.

00:03:55.000 Now, after some training, I felt like Quarter Black was going to be able to get calm, assertive 1.00

00:04:04.000 control over the pooping on the carpet.

00:04:08.000 But that's when I saw a whole bigger problem of fish in the bucket to cook.

00:04:13.000 Coming up on Crowder 9-1-1.

00:04:15.000 Guys, guys, guys, he's going to the shower.

00:04:17.000 Joe?

00:04:17.000 With Derek's daughter, she's nine.

00:04:20.000 Hey, hey, hey, yo!

00:04:21.000 Hey! 0.99

00:04:22.000 Oh, yeah!

00:04:25.000 ♪ You're a stranger in my life

00:04:48.000 That's what I know I know

00:04:52.000 You're a stranger in my life I got to follow 1.00

00:04:56.000 I'm just a bitch I'm just a bitch 1.00

00:05:02.000 I'm just a bitch I usually don't do the slurp on the evening streams, but I 1.00

00:05:10.000 have a little bit of cerveza here, so good to be with you here. 0.84

00:05:13.000 Hey guys, look, really quickly, we're about to do the former Vice President Joe Biden fact check.

00:05:19.000 State of the Union.

00:05:20.000 I assume he'll be late, so live and real time we'll be fact-checking everything.

00:05:26.000 You can use obviously the hashtag, I think it's SOTU State of the Union is the abbreviated version on Twitter, on TikTok, where we still have not been banned.

00:05:35.000 Not yet, so far.

00:05:36.000 Despite accusing Xi Jinping of having a micro wiener.

00:05:40.000 I don't know what it takes.

00:05:41.000 Let's keep just upping the ante.

00:05:42.000 We're going to keep upping the ante.

00:05:43.000 So we'll be live, and of course you can also use the promo code.

00:05:46.000 We ask that you use hashtag Biden fact check, and that is a promo code as well, where you get $20 off.

00:05:51.000 Boom! 0.99

00:05:52.000 Join up tonight.

00:05:53.000 $20 off MugClub.

00:05:53.000 LiveWithCloud.com slash MugClub.

00:05:54.000 And we'll be doing another half hour, at least tonight, wrapping up the evening's festivities.

00:05:59.000 So we have Dave Landau here with me.

00:06:01.000 How are you, sir?

00:06:02.000 Ahoy! 0.99

00:06:03.000 I'm good.

00:06:03.000 How about you?

00:06:04.000 You know, as good as I can be knowing that this is the state of affairs in our country and globally.

00:06:09.000 And, uh, in this studio.

00:06:11.000 I'm excited.

00:06:11.000 I told you guys to use the bathroom before the stream.

00:06:14.000 Well, hmm.

00:06:15.000 I don't know, should my, well, the stream... Alright.

00:06:19.000 That's why... Yeah, by the way, you don't have to walk in when I'm using the restroom to cross-stream.

00:06:22.000 Well, I'm just saying.

00:06:23.000 It's a joke once.

00:06:24.000 I, well, I think it's a joke every day.

00:06:26.000 Well.

00:06:26.000 Twice.

00:06:26.000 Yeah.

00:06:27.000 It just gets to be grating, and I don't know, he's a tremendous lockpicker, and Gerald! 0.69

00:06:30.000 How are you, Gerald A?

00:06:31.000 I'm well, how are you, Stephen?

00:06:32.000 I'm doing alright.

00:06:33.000 Right now they're talking about, uh, on CNN, so we'll bring this up here, you guys, so we can have it, so we will have the stream on.

00:06:38.000 So, this is the only stream you need to watch.

00:06:40.000 I know before, we had to be careful.

00:06:42.000 Sorry, I don't have a cough button, because of copyright.

00:06:44.000 Tonight, we are going to try and just punch in and punch out so you can hear most of the State of the Union Address, and with these long applause breaks, where everyone, of course, will be getting standing O's.

00:06:53.000 Really?

00:06:54.000 Yes, long applause breaks, because he needs it.

00:06:56.000 No, it's gonna be him long breathing breaks.

00:06:58.000 Yes, long breathing breaks, and they will stand up and applaud.

00:07:00.000 With stammering.

00:07:01.000 It'll be like Tom Hanks on Punchline.

00:07:03.000 He'll be sitting there going, Someone help me!

00:07:05.000 Pretty much.

00:07:06.000 You're supposed to applaud here.

00:07:07.000 It says, hold for applause.

00:07:09.000 Right.

00:07:09.000 I'm just excited to see him come out.

00:07:11.000 I don't know if Kamala has hidden the tennis balls from his walker.

00:07:14.000 Right.

00:07:16.000 Replace them with golf balls.

00:07:17.000 Yes, there's a very good chance that she's already buttered the staircase.

00:07:21.000 Why is there a banana on the podium?

00:07:23.000 What's going on here? 0.99

00:07:26.000 If you do take a shot every time he calls her the president, you will be dead in one hour. 1.00

00:07:30.000 Yes, you will be dead. 0.99

00:07:31.000 Which reminds us, we have a drinking game tonight where you can watch along with us. 0.85

00:07:35.000 And Drake, can you bring them up there?

00:07:36.000 And Tokunawa, explain to people, every time you hear this ding, Do you have the ding there?

00:07:43.000 There we go.

00:07:44.000 All right, Keegan, let's be faster to the draw on that.

00:07:46.000 I'm not the ding man.

00:07:48.000 I'm the ding man, it's just two separate things.

00:07:50.000 Yeah, I was going to say more of a ding bat, right? 1.00

00:07:52.000 Correct?

00:07:54.000 That's good.

00:07:56.000 All right, so token on, what are the rules?

00:07:57.000 All right, so number one, if Biden has a moment, so he gaffes, he stutters, he forgets something.

00:08:03.000 Oh lord.

00:08:04.000 So alcohol poisoning.

00:08:04.000 That's all we need.

00:08:05.000 Number two, he's going to die? 0.51

00:08:08.000 Yeah, he blames Russia for anything.

00:08:10.000 Hit a ding every time he gives you the number there, Tim the Toolman.

00:08:13.000 Number three!

00:08:15.000 Number three, he promotes infrastructure or green energy.

00:08:18.000 Commonly known as imaginary energy, yes.

00:08:21.000 Uh, number four, he encourages the vaccine.

00:08:24.000 Okay.

00:08:25.000 Or number five, he mentions racism or white supremacy.

00:08:28.000 Man, well if we have to drink like this for the entire stream, I'll be feeling like I got my fourth booster. 1.00

00:08:32.000 Yes, well, you might hit your head and die. 0.98

00:08:35.000 Right? 0.99

00:08:35.000 Uh, not that you would. 0.99

00:08:37.000 No, that doesn't happen.

00:08:38.000 No, that doesn't happen.

00:08:39.000 No, I'm not saying from a booster.

00:08:40.000 He was talking about in the show.

00:08:41.000 Yeah, from drinking.

00:08:41.000 Oh, you were implying, you were speaking ill of the science.

00:08:43.000 tell you also in a warren oh you were implying it's implying you're speaking

00:08:46.000 you were speaking ill of the science no no no no no never we would never there's

00:08:50.000 science is not a theory it's a fact yes fact it's mutually agreed and by science

00:08:54.000 we mean what Foushee says depending on the day well yeah take a poll we go

00:08:57.000 really quickly do you guys see this that Dr. Oz wanted to debate Fauci.

00:09:02.000 Dr. Oz was running as a Republican and it was trending all over Twitter with people saying, oh Dr. Oz, maybe the MyPillow guy is more your speed.

00:09:09.000 He's an active surgeon, a world-class surgeon.

00:09:13.000 Dr. Fauci hasn't seen a patient in 40 years.

00:09:15.000 Oh wow, I would take that.

00:09:17.000 He's also answered every question anyone's ever asked him about healthcare.

00:09:21.000 Right.

00:09:21.000 That's his job.

00:09:22.000 As a matter of fact, if you Google right now, Dr. Oz, real doctor, you will find all articles before he ran for office saying, actually, Dr. Oz is a totally legitimate doctor who's really good at what he does.

00:09:31.000 Okay, so our predictions for tonight.

00:09:33.000 Gerald, you first.

00:09:34.000 Um, and this is not like a bold prediction on this first part, but I think he's going to try and find a way to blame the issue in Ukraine on Donald Trump's policies.

00:09:42.000 I know there's a lot of people... Ooh, taking a risk.

00:09:43.000 No, no, no.

00:09:44.000 I know that's not a risk.

00:09:45.000 Taking a flyer there, Gerald.

00:09:46.000 I'm just saying that... Yeah, I don't know.

00:09:48.000 He's definitely going to try to tie that because for some reason they can't get off of Trump, right?

00:09:53.000 Yes.

00:09:53.000 That's definitely going to be it.

00:09:54.000 We will have some fact checks for that.

00:09:55.000 We're ready for that one because we see it coming.

00:09:57.000 But then I think he is also going to try and distract people from the economy.

00:10:01.000 That is the third rail for them right now, going into midterms, and he's going to do everything that he can to blame the economy.

00:10:07.000 So third rail, a Black Lives Matter recidivist pushed an Asian in front of him.

00:10:10.000 That's true.

00:10:11.000 But he's going to blame the economy on the Russia invasion, even though that just happened.

00:10:15.000 Yes. 0.95

00:10:15.000 And the economy has sucked for a while. 0.95

00:10:16.000 That's a good point. 0.92

00:10:17.000 OK.

00:10:17.000 I think that.

00:10:18.000 I think you'll also see him try and imply that Donald Trump weakened NATO.

00:10:23.000 And this is going to be a big thing.

00:10:24.000 You've seen this narrative going out.

00:10:25.000 Well, first off, let me hear, Dave, what do you think?

00:10:27.000 I think four mini-strokes, a grand mal seizure, and a partridge in a pear tree.

00:10:32.000 Yes.

00:10:32.000 How long do you think it will take him to realize he has crapped his pants?

00:10:35.000 Don't be a jerk, bud. 1.00

00:10:36.000 Well, he's already gonna walk out with it in his pants. 1.00

00:10:39.000 It's a little squishy.

00:10:39.000 So you're saying, well, I think tonight's show is sponsored by Imodium, by the way.

00:10:43.000 Go out and get you some.

00:10:46.000 I really do think he's going to blame most of it on Trump.

00:10:48.000 He's probably not going to mention it.

00:10:49.000 He's probably going to go, hey, don't look at your phones at the Dow today because, oh my goodness, I took one look at my Fidelity Investment account and I thought, well, there goes half of everything.

00:11:00.000 I just heard we lost Imodium, but we do have Pepto-Bismol for upset stomach, nausea, former vice presidency, and diarrhea.

00:11:07.000 Uncomfortable.

00:11:08.000 Excellent.

00:11:08.000 I'm excited.

00:11:09.000 Larry, the cable guy is going to jet ski in with us.

00:11:14.000 No, I think he's gonna blame the economy on Trump because clearly that was his fault.

00:11:19.000 Wait, are they getting ready to come in now?

00:11:20.000 No, no, they say four minutes.

00:11:22.000 There's several other people.

00:11:23.000 Yeah, they have to announce a bunch of people no one cares about.

00:11:25.000 Who's the guy with the scarf?

00:11:26.000 Why the blue scarf?

00:11:28.000 That's a lady with a scarf. 1.00

00:11:29.000 Oh, it's because they want to stand with Ukraine.

00:11:32.000 Oh, okay, that makes sense.

00:11:32.000 That's what it is.

00:11:33.000 For the first time, good for them.

00:11:34.000 Wow, that's great.

00:11:35.000 There's Stephen King taking a stand.

00:11:37.000 There's a Supreme Court. 1.00

00:11:39.000 Serial rapist. 1.00

00:11:40.000 Blames everyone but himself. 0.98

00:11:42.000 What would have been great is if Kavanaugh walked in with a beer helmet.

00:11:45.000 Oh, yeah.

00:11:47.000 And just looked over at Cory Booker.

00:11:48.000 Here's looking at you, kid.

00:11:50.000 Just kidding, keep acting like you're straight.

00:11:51.000 Inviting everyone to a pool party?

00:11:53.000 I like beer!

00:11:54.000 He will be talking about the Supreme Court nominee, probably trying to tout that as a victory with very little qualifications.

00:12:01.000 Brown-Jackson, I never know how to pronounce the first name.

00:12:04.000 So I do think this, look, I think he's going to try and, they've been trying to consistently blame Donald Trump for Russia.

00:12:10.000 And here's, we can get into the minutia.

00:12:12.000 And sometimes people will say that I'm being reductive.

00:12:14.000 By the way, of course, Dave, as a former alcoholic, cannot drink.

00:12:16.000 He'll be doing whippets. 0.97

00:12:17.000 No.

00:12:18.000 No.

00:12:18.000 The drinking game.

00:12:19.000 Not doing that either.

00:12:20.000 He'll be doing a drug.

00:12:21.000 Instead, yes.

00:12:23.000 He'll be doing poppers. 0.99

00:12:24.000 By the end of it, he has brain damage and AIDS.

00:12:26.000 Liberace's son will be here, and Dave will be doing nitrate poppers.

00:12:30.000 I'll be painted gold for some reason.

00:12:32.000 By the end, Dave's just belly down on a piano.

00:12:36.000 Scandalabra.

00:12:38.000 I can play chopsticks on a typewriter!

00:12:40.000 Look at me go!

00:12:41.000 Oh, I'm getting weaker.

00:12:43.000 So I do think, you know, they're really trying to blame Donald Trump for Russia.

00:12:46.000 Now before I get into the minutiae here, let me ask you this, and you guys can comment, obviously not right now while we're live, and we'll be taking your chats on Mugglo, but many of you will be watching this probably tomorrow, or well, if you're watching it tomorrow, today. 0.93

00:13:00.000 um so uh oh there's i'm sorry miss biden your husband's dumb i bet you think you're a doctor i never thought he'd shit his pants he laughed i think no i did that would be a lie she's a doctor what like is that she tells everybody she's a doctor she's a doctor of not love that's what it is yeah she's a doctor of frigid that's what i thought okay They call me, they call me Dr. No Love! 0.80

00:13:34.000 I will say they want to avoid, of course, the approval ratings. 0.99

00:13:36.000 Now, they've been trying to blame Donald Trump for Russia.

00:13:38.000 Before I get into the details, does anyone here, and we've talked about the real problem with Russia, right?

00:13:42.000 And two things can be true.

00:13:43.000 Your heart can break for the people of the Ukraine, and you can also understand that it's not America's job to go out and police the world and to send Americans to die for this conflict in Russia.

00:13:53.000 Both things can be true. 0.75

00:13:54.000 I think these are reasonable positions to hold.

00:13:55.000 You held one position.

00:13:56.000 Lane holds another position.

00:13:58.000 Because where does it stop with Russia? 0.61

00:14:00.000 I do think, I lean towards the fact that they're not really capable of becoming this superpower they want to.

00:14:04.000 It's a flex.

00:14:04.000 However, the concern, of course, is Russia outlying itself with China.

00:14:09.000 We did a segment on this.

00:14:10.000 You can go to Thursday's, or was it Monday's show?

00:14:12.000 Was it last week?

00:14:13.000 This week.

00:14:14.000 Monday's show.

00:14:15.000 It was Monday's show.

00:14:17.000 Let me ask you.

00:14:18.000 Genuinely, you can comment.

00:14:19.000 Does anyone out there, I know many of you watching, a lot of you are not necessarily conservatives, you might be more liberal.

00:14:25.000 Does anyone actually believe that we're in a stronger position with China right now than with Donald Trump?

00:14:29.000 Does anybody actually believe that Donald Trump was anything short of the only president in modern American history to be tough on China?

00:14:35.000 Here's the thing.

00:14:36.000 This guy can't talk about the alliance with China.

00:14:39.000 This party can't talk about China.

00:14:42.000 They can't talk tough with China. 0.93

00:14:43.000 Why?

00:14:44.000 Because they've been aligning themselves with China for a long time.

00:14:47.000 Think about this.

00:14:48.000 When Mitt Romney talked about the threat of Russia, Back in those debates in, I believe it was 2008?

00:14:53.000 It was when he got re-elected.

00:14:57.000 2012.

00:14:57.000 So 2012, Barack Obama said, the 80's called, they want their foreign policy back.

00:15:02.000 And then when Donald Trump talked about China, I believe he even had this former vice president, certainly there's Pete Buttgig, I don't know, oh I guess, I thought he was going to come out with a breast pump.

00:15:10.000 I thought he was the designated survivor.

00:15:12.000 Yeah, he's doing breast feed too.

00:15:13.000 Looks like he just got off a horse.

00:15:18.000 Walking bowlegged, are we, Pete?

00:15:19.000 Strange.

00:15:20.000 Here's your seatless bike.

00:15:22.000 They went after Donald Trump saying, well, you can't speak this way about China, one of our most valuable partners in a global economy, because they want to push this idea of a global economy, and who do they want to align themselves with?

00:15:32.000 The Democratic Party.

00:15:34.000 China.

00:15:34.000 So they really are kneecapped.

00:15:36.000 They cannot address the actual threat that most Americans are concerned with.

00:15:39.000 Not only China, of course, with Taiwan, which is more international.

00:15:41.000 A lot of Americans aren't following that.

00:15:43.000 I believe that it's scorched earth if China moves at all on Taiwan, and they've been insinuating that they would. 0.82

00:15:49.000 But we need to worry about the alliance with Russia and with China.

00:15:53.000 That's something that they cannot address.

00:15:54.000 So they have to start dancing circles around this.

00:15:56.000 That's why they're going to have to go to Green Energy.

00:15:57.000 That's why they're going to have to talk about COVID.

00:15:59.000 By the way, more COVID deaths under former Vice President Joe Biden than Donald Trump while we're talking about NATO.

00:16:05.000 Donald Trump was the first president to actually strengthen NATO.

00:16:08.000 What they meant when they tried to say that Donald Trump weakened NATO, is Donald Trump was tough with NATO.

00:16:12.000 Where, of course NATO, for those of you who don't know, once NATO was basically created, these countries that signed on to NATO were supposed to spend 2% of their GDP on military spending toward NATO, right?

00:16:24.000 That was the agreement.

00:16:26.000 We paid, the United States I believe was 3.4%, the average from other countries was well under 2%, I believe it might have been 1.5%.

00:16:32.000 There were many countries that paid less than 1%.

00:16:35.000 So, Donald Trump said, you better start paying your fair share, or oops, maybe Putin's gonna march through here and hear the lamentations of your women. 1.00

00:16:45.000 See you driven before them.

00:16:47.000 Oh, that sounds terrible.

00:16:49.000 Terrible.

00:16:50.000 I would hate for that to happen.

00:16:51.000 That's what other people say would happen.

00:16:52.000 I would never say that.

00:16:55.000 And for the first time, there was an increase in spending.

00:16:57.000 The country started finally paying their fair share.

00:16:59.000 NATO spending went up under Donald Trump.

00:17:02.000 What the left means when they say we need to strengthen NATO is the United States needs to foot the bill.

00:17:06.000 And this is my question, and again, you guys can probably respond if you're watching this live on Twitter.

00:17:10.000 We'll read some of those tweets and we'll read your chats with the hashtag Biden fact check.

00:17:14.000 That's also the promo code, $20 off.

00:17:18.000 If people went years, decades, not spending their 2% with NATO, okay?

00:17:23.000 Because that's the agreement, right?

00:17:25.000 All of us are aligned to protect each other.

00:17:28.000 Is it morally right for them to benefit from the United States military?

00:17:31.000 To defend them?

00:17:32.000 And when you have places, you have countries, for example, use Germany as an example, where they've said, oh, the internet is a human right, we're able to provide all of these rights, and people saying, socialized healthcare for our citizens, when you Americans, blah blah blah blah blah, Yeah, because you don't spend money on your own defense, let alone the international defense that you promised. 0.94

00:17:49.000 You guys get to service your country with free shit at the expense of us protecting the free world.

00:17:56.000 That's the important component with NATO, because guess what? 0.98

00:17:58.000 If other people aren't doing it, and I think they should have to pay back all the money they didn't pay, or guess what?

00:18:03.000 You're out!

00:18:04.000 Or at the very least, you don't get any defense from NATO or any other allied country, certainly the United States, until you pay your amount.

00:18:11.000 That's a fair agreement, right?

00:18:12.000 I think so.

00:18:13.000 I think, honestly, you're just saying we want to strengthen these countries so that they can defend themselves.

00:18:17.000 How many times does another country, or as Kamala Harris put it, a large country, have to march through a small country that's next door before you guys realize, hey, we probably ought to spend some money on defense so we don't get our butts kicked.

00:18:29.000 That's all Donald Trump was trying to do, and they're trying to spin that on him.

00:18:31.000 I think it's better to occupy a country for two decades, and then just leave all our stuff there.

00:18:36.000 Yes, exactly.

00:18:37.000 Well, pallets of cash that we could not possibly... Do you mean like leave Blackhawk helicopters?

00:18:41.000 Yeah, like billions of dollars worth of... I was pissed off about the workout equipment, honestly, that was left.

00:18:46.000 Yeah, exactly.

00:18:47.000 Although I don't know how many ISIS members will really take advantage of that total gym. 0.57

00:18:51.000 Oh look, it's a good contract!

00:18:53.000 Oh yes, a Peloton!

00:18:54.000 It's what I've always wanted!

00:18:56.000 It was just the bikes that Lindsay Lohan used on the commercials, and we wanted to get them out of America as quickly as possible.

00:19:02.000 You're on your Peloton course, you see a little icon for Abdul Baghdadi, who's a Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, his times are fantastic!

00:19:09.000 What's he, on EPO?

00:19:12.000 I think what you're both saying is pretty spot on.

00:19:14.000 I mean, they're going to push division about the wrong things.

00:19:17.000 They're going to push fear about the wrong things instead of having you focus on what we should really be worried about because that's what they've spent the last two years doing.

00:19:24.000 That's what they spent the last year of Trump's presidency doing.

00:19:26.000 It's what they spent the last year doing.

00:19:28.000 And when was the last time we were this bad?

00:19:32.000 The United States?

00:19:34.000 About four years ago.

00:19:35.000 Yeah, roughly.

00:19:36.000 Roughly?

00:19:37.000 Maybe five?

00:19:37.000 I don't know if I'm... I'm just ballparking it.

00:19:40.000 Yeah.

00:19:41.000 I mean, even a little, like, longer than that.

00:19:43.000 Yeah.

00:19:44.000 I would, I mean, this bad.

00:19:46.000 By the way, he's four minutes late, so I just wonder if he's still, they're, like, knocking on the stall right now.

00:19:46.000 Yeah.

00:19:50.000 Mr. Trump looks like the Muppet, sorry, Mr. Biden. 0.86

00:19:53.000 Mr. Biden, they're looking, it's like the Muppet Show where it has his name, but they put his star on the toilet.

00:19:58.000 I think what you mean is on time?

00:20:00.000 Yes, exactly.

00:20:00.000 Yes.

00:20:00.000 Yeah.

00:20:01.000 Really quickly, though, he prepared for tonight, and he actually brought in the big guns.

00:20:05.000 We do actually have footage, I believe.

00:20:06.000 Is this correct, Tokenal?

00:20:07.000 We have footage of former Vice President Joe Biden.

00:20:10.000 Almost.

00:20:11.000 Oh, one second.

00:20:11.000 We almost have it.

00:20:12.000 We're going to queue it up here in just a second here.

00:20:14.000 Look at this!

00:20:14.000 These people are acting like it's a wine mixer.

00:20:17.000 It really is amazing.

00:20:17.000 Yeah, they are.

00:20:18.000 And they're all looking at, what's the guy, Kavanaugh, like nothing happened.

00:20:22.000 Right.

00:20:23.000 Kavanaugh's standing back there.

00:20:24.000 He's just standing there, like, by himself.

00:20:25.000 Like, we all know.

00:20:26.000 Remember that whole rape thing?

00:20:29.000 Yeah, it wasn't real.

00:20:29.000 It wasn't real.

00:20:30.000 We're sorry about that.

00:20:31.000 We just tried to destroy your life and reputation for all time.

00:20:33.000 But you know what?

00:20:34.000 Let bygones be bygones.

00:20:36.000 It's almost like when people after a fight, you know, whether it's like Lennox... Oh wait, is this him?

00:20:40.000 No, not him.

00:20:41.000 Who is that lady? 1.00

00:20:42.000 That looks like the witch from Robin Hood.

00:20:43.000 That looks like a Biden back there, though.

00:20:46.000 Is that Biden back there?

00:20:46.000 I think that could be Biden back there.

00:20:48.000 Let's see who this is.

00:20:49.000 Here we go.

00:20:49.000 Alright, now let's hear who it is there, Keegan.

00:20:51.000 Ladies and gentlemen, the former Vice President of the United States.

00:20:58.000 Alright.

00:21:05.000 Alright Keegan, you can probably feather it.

00:21:06.000 Is that the Secret Service lady right there? 1.00

00:21:08.000 Is that his body man?

00:21:10.000 Is that his bodyguard?

00:21:11.000 He's like, yeah, I want equity in bodyguards.

00:21:13.000 What does that mean?

00:21:14.000 I want the lady from the Hoverround commercial with osteoporosis. 1.00

00:21:17.000 Follow the lady that smells like her grandmother. 1.00

00:21:19.000 She will lead you to the podium.

00:21:20.000 You really just need someone stronger.

00:21:22.000 Yeah.

00:21:25.000 I bet you if you grabbed former Vice President Biden's wrist and just tweaked it the wrong way.

00:21:28.000 Hey, look, Eric Swalwell, the guy who was banging a Chinese spy.

00:21:33.000 How is that man still allowed to be a representative in government?

00:21:36.000 Is that not, like, close to treason?

00:21:37.000 I mean, he'd be, like, shaking an old broom from the 50s.

00:21:42.000 It's dust?

00:21:43.000 You know what?

00:21:44.000 Maybe let's say he goes with his left hand.

00:21:45.000 It's a dustpan.

00:21:46.000 What is this?

00:21:47.000 This is a weird... I'm the six dollar man!

00:21:49.000 Go have a good speech.

00:21:51.000 Am I the president?

00:21:52.000 Oh lord.

00:21:52.000 Oh, did you see that pat?

00:21:53.000 That pat was like a... You're doing okay, big guy.

00:21:56.000 That wasn't a confident pat.

00:21:58.000 Nobody pats him hard.

00:21:59.000 Except there's going to be a bruise the size of a melon on his head.

00:22:05.000 He's got a cab of blood clot.

00:22:06.000 Looks like he's been in a fight.

00:22:09.000 No, former Vice President Biden's never been in a fight.

00:22:12.000 He always claims that he likes to take people out behind the bike rack.

00:22:14.000 So this is a problem for me right here.

00:22:16.000 He's shaking some hands and not others on the Supreme Court.

00:22:19.000 It's like he walked right past Kavanaugh and Amy Coney Barrett and he's like, I'll go shake these guys' hands.

00:22:25.000 That's fine.

00:22:26.000 Look at how he's walking.

00:22:29.000 Look at how he's walking.

00:22:30.000 This is the representative of the free world for crying out loud.

00:22:33.000 And I know it shouldn't matter, I don't know if you can bring up the hashtag too on the screen so people can see it's the Biden fact check.

00:22:38.000 We'll be fact checking everything live here as much as we can.

00:22:42.000 Look, look, he has to use, he has to use the podium to get up there.

00:22:46.000 I'm surprised they didn't install a ramp.

00:22:49.000 Alright, let's hear it.

00:22:49.000 By the way, expect a lot of long claps because these people are all going to... Is he looking at his cards?

00:22:54.000 They've been trained.

00:22:55.000 Or he's handing them out.

00:22:57.000 I'm here!

00:22:57.000 I'm here to hand out diplomas!

00:22:59.000 Yeah, she's gonna rip up her copy of the speech just like she did last time with Trump. 0.99

00:23:02.000 Expect them to clap.

00:23:04.000 They're just a yes man.

00:23:05.000 Like, you're doing great, kid!

00:23:07.000 Your speech, your soto's perfect!

00:23:09.000 It's a perfect soto! 0.99

00:23:11.000 I don't wanna cut ya! 0.53

00:23:12.000 Your soto's perfect!

00:23:14.000 He thinks he's handing out menus?

00:23:16.000 He's like, here you go, you can sit here.

00:23:16.000 Yes.

00:23:18.000 His has a maze on the back of it.

00:23:20.000 Do you want a bread basket?

00:23:22.000 Oh, look at this.

00:23:23.000 Did you see that?

00:23:23.000 That is significantly closer.

00:23:25.000 I don't know if we can get people to bring it up from the control room.

00:23:27.000 Looks like those prompters are significantly closer than they've been in the past.

00:23:30.000 Could just be an optical illusion.

00:23:32.000 Who else is coming in now?

00:23:34.000 Except that they're right there.

00:23:36.000 Yes.

00:23:36.000 Alright, okay.

00:23:37.000 Hey, look, I love that one guy's wearing a mask. 1.00

00:23:39.000 He's gonna die on that hill. 0.98

00:23:40.000 Yeah.

00:23:42.000 Yeah, why are there three people wearing masks in the rest of the places?

00:23:45.000 Nah, we're fine.

00:23:46.000 They just made him wear it because he has bad breath.

00:23:48.000 No, it's like something else will kill you.

00:23:51.000 Maybe let's double mask it.

00:23:52.000 Why me?

00:23:53.000 Because you smell like you've been in a truck stall with George Michael. 0.99

00:23:57.000 I hate your face. 0.99

00:23:59.000 Pick one. 0.99

00:24:01.000 Whatever it is.

00:24:02.000 I just don't want your face.

00:24:03.000 Look, he's pointing like he's Babe Ruth, except he's pointing to where he's going to bungle it.

00:24:07.000 Okay, all right.

00:24:08.000 Everyone, Biden fact.

00:24:09.000 Hashtag Biden fact.

00:24:10.000 Hashtag SOTU.

00:24:14.000 Madam Speaker, Madam Vice President, our First Lady and Second Gentleman, Members of Congress in the Cabinet, Justices of the Supreme Court, my fellow Americans.

00:24:26.000 Last year, COVID-19 kept us apart.

00:24:30.000 This year, we're finally together again.

00:24:33.000 Tonight... Yeah, why is that?

00:24:39.000 Tonight, we meet as Democrats, Republicans, Independents, but most importantly, as Americans.

00:24:47.000 With the duty to one another, to America, to the American people, to the Constitution.

00:24:53.000 And an unwavering resolve that freedom will always triumph over tyranny.

00:24:59.000 Another slur.

00:25:00.000 We're sorry, folks.

00:25:01.000 We did this to you.

00:25:02.000 Thank you.

00:25:02.000 We're sorry, folks.

00:25:03.000 We did this to you.

00:25:04.000 Thank you.

00:25:04.000 We did this to you.

00:25:05.000 Thank you.

00:25:06.000 We did this to you.

00:25:07.000 Thank you.

00:25:07.000 No.

00:25:10.000 A clap already?

00:25:11.000 That's a standing O?

00:25:13.000 Because of freedom triumphing over turning.

00:25:15.000 His wife's like, I haven't had a standing O in years. 1.00

00:25:17.000 Three days ago, Russia's Vladimir Putin sought to shake the very foundations of the free world,

00:25:23.000 thinking he could make it bend to his menacing ways.

00:25:28.000 No, that's Kamala.

00:25:28.000 But he badly miscalculated.

00:25:31.000 He thought he could roll into Ukraine and the world would roll over. 1.00

00:25:34.000 That's Kamala. 0.92

00:25:35.000 Instead, he met with a wall of strength he never anticipated or imagined.

00:25:40.000 He met Ukrainian people.

00:25:42.000 Good thing Janet has a drink for every one of her necklines. 1.00

00:25:46.000 What'd you think he was gonna meet?

00:25:48.000 Other people?

00:25:49.000 I don't know.

00:25:50.000 Invaded Ukraine? 0.91

00:25:51.000 Georgians? 0.89

00:25:54.000 That's the Ukrainian ambassador?

00:25:56.000 I thought she was part of a caravan.

00:25:59.000 I thought she was a gypsy. 1.00

00:25:59.000 She's pointed at him and said, thinner. 1.00

00:26:00.000 Older.

00:26:01.000 How'd they do that?

00:26:02.000 With guns?

00:26:02.000 It's thinner, older.

00:26:04.000 It literally inspires the world.

00:26:06.000 Groups of citizens blocking tanks with their bodies.

00:26:09.000 Everyone from students to retirees to teachers turn soldiers defending their homeland.

00:26:15.000 How'd they do that? With guns?

00:26:17.000 In this struggle, President Zelensky said in his speech to the European Parliament,

00:26:21.000 Light will win over darkness.

00:26:24.000 Ukrainian Ambassador to the United States.

00:26:26.000 Oh, what? 1.00

00:26:26.000 He said Ukrainian Bastard. 1.00

00:26:27.000 I wish she was out there. 0.99

00:26:28.000 Oh, was that supposed to be ambassador drink?

00:26:30.000 Oh, what? 1.00

00:26:31.000 He said Ukrainian bastard. 1.00

00:26:33.000 I wish she was out there. 1.00

00:26:40.000 Thank God she got out.

00:26:43.000 Look at how Jill is standing six feet away from the ambassador. 1.00

00:26:46.000 Not because of COVID, she just thinks she's gross. 0.64

00:26:48.000 I know.

00:26:49.000 You should just hug her.

00:26:51.000 If Russia hadn't invaded you, we never would have met. 0.95

00:26:53.000 Right.

00:26:53.000 She's bright, she's strong, she's resolved.

00:26:59.000 I mean, brave, sure, strong.

00:27:00.000 I don't know that she could deadlift 250.

00:27:02.000 Stop trying to sell me turquoise jewelry.

00:27:07.000 I do not need another mood ring.

00:27:08.000 Please stop.

00:27:12.000 Do you see the United States of America stand with the Ukrainian people?

00:27:17.000 Throughout our history, we've learned this lesson.

00:27:20.000 When dictators do not pay a price for their aggression, they cause more chaos.

00:27:26.000 They keep moving.

00:27:28.000 And the cost, the threats to the America and America to the world keeps rising.

00:27:34.000 That's why the NATO alliance was created to secure peace and stability in Europe after World War II.

00:27:41.000 The United States is a member, along with 29 other nations.

00:27:46.000 It matters.

00:27:47.000 American diplomacy matters.

00:27:49.000 American resolve matters.

00:27:52.000 Putin's latest attack on Ukraine was premeditated and totally unprovoked.

00:27:58.000 He rejected repeated, repeated efforts at diplomacy.

00:28:03.000 He thought the West and NATO wouldn't respond.

00:28:06.000 Why's that?

00:28:06.000 He thought he could divide us at home, in this chamber, in this nation.

00:28:11.000 He thought he could divide us in Europe as well.

00:28:14.000 But Putin was wrong.

00:28:16.000 We are ready.

00:28:17.000 We are united and that's what we did.

00:28:20.000 We stayed united.

00:28:21.000 We prepared extensively and carefully.

00:28:25.000 We spent months building coalitions of other freedom-loving nations in Europe and the Americas.

00:28:29.000 What?

00:28:30.000 Months?

00:28:30.000 Alright, that's pretty good.

00:28:32.000 Freedom-loving nations.

00:28:33.000 You spent months?

00:28:36.000 Like many of you, I spent countless hours unifying your European allies.

00:28:40.000 Yeah.

00:28:40.000 An hour fifteen before your afternoon nap.

00:28:42.000 in advance.

00:28:43.000 But he said mumps.

00:28:44.000 Putin was planning.

00:28:45.000 He has them.

00:28:46.000 And precisely how we would try to falsify and justify his aggression.

00:28:51.000 What?

00:28:52.000 We countered Russia's lies with the truth. 0.86

00:28:55.000 And now, now that he's acted, the free world is holding him accountable.

00:29:00.000 Oh, jeez.

00:29:01.000 Come on, man.

00:29:02.000 I don't even remember any of the other drinking rules.

00:29:03.000 Can you guys bring them up?

00:29:04.000 Okay, alright, that's enough.

00:29:05.000 We get it.

00:29:06.000 Putin is now isolated from the world more than he has ever been.

00:29:08.000 to blame Russia for anything, promote superstructure.

00:29:12.000 Okay, all right, that's enough.

00:29:14.000 We get it.

00:29:14.000 In Russia and supporting the people of Ukraine.

00:29:18.000 Putin is now isolated from the world more than he has ever been.

00:29:23.000 No, he's not.

00:29:23.000 Together.

00:29:24.000 He actually has more real estate.

00:29:27.000 It's true.

00:29:30.000 It's like someone widening your backyard.

00:29:32.000 Are you feeling isolated yet?

00:29:34.000 What?

00:29:34.000 I've got you right where I want you.

00:29:37.000 We're also putting a golf course in back, which will be municipal.

00:29:39.000 You'll have access to it.

00:29:41.000 We're squeezing the vice.

00:29:42.000 Putting a privacy fence up to your deck?

00:29:44.000 Have you stopped buying oil?

00:29:45.000 Just asking.

00:29:50.000 Preventing Russia's Central Bank from defending the Russian Ruble. 0.99

00:29:54.000 What the f**k? 0.94

00:29:56.000 Sorry. 0.99

00:29:56.000 Drink? 0.99

00:29:57.000 Defending the Russian Rubu?

00:29:58.000 Uh-oh.

00:30:03.000 Make sure you guys intersperse some water in this drinking game.

00:30:06.000 Mine's just ginger ale.

00:30:06.000 Man.

00:30:07.000 I can't do it.

00:30:08.000 They just show someone who looks aggravated to be there.

00:30:10.000 I say to the Russian oligarchs and the corrupt leaders who built billions of dollars off this violent disease, no more.

00:30:18.000 The United States...

00:30:20.000 I want to get up again.

00:30:22.000 Oh my gosh. Shouldn't have done leg day this morning.

00:30:26.000 They're looking around at each other like, really?

00:30:28.000 Okay, I guess we're standing.

00:30:29.000 Did you guys hear that?

00:30:31.000 What the hell are we clapping for? 0.62

00:30:32.000 Rufus! 0.92

00:30:33.000 Rufus!

00:30:35.000 To go after the crimes of the Russian oligarchs. 0.61

00:30:37.000 We're joining with European allies to find and seize their yachts, their luxury apartments, their private jets.

00:30:45.000 Oh, come on! 0.99

00:30:47.000 We're coming for you, ill-begotten gangs.

00:30:49.000 And tonight, I'm announcing that we will join our allies in closing the door.

00:30:52.000 Hold on, hold on.

00:31:01.000 You mean they can't fly over here?

00:31:03.000 We're not exactly on the way to Ukraine. 1.00

00:31:05.000 There's one WNBA team from Russia like, son of a bitch! 1.00

00:31:09.000 I was really looking forward to pulling off weave. 1.00

00:31:11.000 I like the woman to the right who's just like, I'm not moving. 0.86

00:31:14.000 This is not what I'm saying.

00:31:15.000 I'm not doing this.

00:31:16.000 And trading remains suspended.

00:31:20.000 The Russian economy is reeling and Putin alone is the one to blame.

00:31:26.000 Together with our allies, we're providing support to the Ukrainians in their fight for freedom.

00:31:32.000 Military assistance, economic assistance, humanitarian assistance.

00:31:35.000 Which, by the way, to be clear, Donald Trump provided in 2017 $47 million in arms, 210 anti-tank missiles, 35 launchers.

00:31:42.000 In 2019, he approved another $39 million of 150 Javelin missiles and two launchers.

00:31:47.000 He increased the overall spending and troop deployment in Europe.

00:31:49.000 So just to be clear, he did this before there was a war with Russia.

00:31:53.000 Donald Trump did.

00:31:54.000 Whereas Biden just said he's been working for months after these attacks.

00:31:59.000 Our forces are not...

00:32:01.000 She just rolled her eyes. 1.00

00:32:02.000 She's like, no.

00:32:02.000 Conflict?

00:32:02.000 Dang it.

00:32:03.000 You mean the allies who spent less than 1% of the GDP?

00:32:04.000 Guess what?

00:32:05.000 They should not be defended at all.

00:32:06.000 Enjoy your socialized healthcare.

00:32:06.000 We're not going to Europe to fight Ukraine, but to defend our NATO allies in the event

00:32:11.000 that Putin decides to keep moving west.

00:32:15.000 For that purpose, we've mobilized American ground forces, and we've shipped them to 0.94

00:32:18.000 protect NATO countries, including Poland, Romania, Latvia, Lithuania, and Estonia.

00:32:25.000 And as I've made crystal clear, the United States and our allies will defend every inch

00:32:31.000 of territory that is NATO territory with the full force of our collective power.

00:32:36.000 Hey, how about NATO protects every inch of NATO?

00:32:40.000 How about the rest of the NATO nations protect?

00:32:43.000 Their own nation.

00:32:44.000 How about when the Ukraine gave up... Ah, I said it.

00:32:46.000 How about Ukraine giving up their nuclear missiles and we were like, hey, don't worry, we'll be there.

00:32:50.000 So under Trump, NATO allies increased their spending by $50 billion.

00:32:54.000 Just to be clear.

00:32:56.000 Only two other countries even paid 2% of the promised amount.

00:32:58.000 That was Greece and the UK. 0.96

00:33:00.000 And who cares about Greece? 0.99

00:33:01.000 That's just a few lesbians on an island with rocket launchers. 1.00

00:33:03.000 It's true. 0.97

00:33:04.000 He'll pay a continuing high price over the long run.

00:33:08.000 And a pound of Ukrainian people.

00:33:10.000 Proud, proud people.

00:33:11.000 Pound for pound ready to fight with every inch of energy they have.

00:33:15.000 They've known 30 years of independence.

00:33:18.000 A pound of Ukrainian people, yes. 0.93

00:33:22.000 A pound of Ukrainian people in the hand is three Russians in a bush. 1.00

00:33:26.000 Yep.

00:33:27.000 I'll be honest with you, as I always promised I would be.

00:33:29.000 A pound for pound of a pound of hand.

00:33:31.000 I can kill two birds and I'm always stoned.

00:33:34.000 Has cost around the world.

00:33:36.000 Huh?

00:33:37.000 And I'm taking robust action to make sure the pain of our sanctions is targeted at Russia's economy. 0.80

00:33:43.000 And that we use every tool at our disposal to protect American businesses and consumers.

00:33:48.000 Tonight, I can announce the United States has worked with 30 other countries to release 60 million barrels of oil from reserves around the world.

00:33:57.000 How about oil in the United States?

00:34:00.000 Why do we need any oil from around the world?

00:34:01.000 Keep in mind, he's the one who shut down the Keystone Pipeline immediately for the first time ever in modern American history.

00:34:07.000 Under Donald Trump, we were a net exporter of oil in 2016.

00:34:13.000 It was 2016, maybe it was 2019, and then we went right back.

00:34:16.000 He's the one who approved the Nord Stream 2 pipeline going through Russia.

00:34:20.000 Why do we need anyone else's oil?

00:34:22.000 It's clear that we don't.

00:34:23.000 Well, I feel like everybody there drives gas cars because nobody stood for this.

00:34:28.000 The Ukraine will have left Russia weaker and the rest of the world stronger. 0.95

00:34:33.000 Guys, check in his phone. 1.00

00:34:35.000 He's like, ah, shit. He got some text from his wife. Can you bring home eggs? 1.00

00:34:38.000 Ah, shit. Bitch won't leave me alone. 1.00

00:34:41.000 Hey, by the way, they just said that the 60 million barrels of oil had been released 0.99

00:34:45.000 That sounds like a lot.

00:34:46.000 We use 20.6 million barrels a day in the United States.

00:34:50.000 So that's three days, Joe, thanks.

00:34:52.000 By the way, keep in mind, if we drilled and fracked more here, guess what?

00:34:55.000 We could provide people in Europe, including the Ukraine, with more oil.

00:34:59.000 Hey, America first helps the country first.

00:35:02.000 Unbelievable.

00:35:02.000 Put your oxygen mask on first, and he should know about that with his CPAC.

00:35:06.000 I have a CPAC.

00:35:06.000 I didn't die six months ago.

00:35:07.000 I have a C-bad throat.

00:35:09.000 For different reasons.

00:35:15.000 I didn't die six months ago.

00:35:17.000 What?

00:35:22.000 Do they have time?

00:35:29.000 They're being attacked right now.

00:35:31.000 What's that?

00:35:31.000 Burisma?

00:35:32.000 Yes, that was Stephen King.

00:35:33.000 towards the deep bond that connects our two nations.

00:35:36.000 We stand with you.

00:35:37.000 What's that, Burisma?

00:35:38.000 We stand with you.

00:35:39.000 That was Stephen King.

00:35:40.000 Putin may circle Kiev with tanks, but he'll never gain the hearts and souls

00:35:44.000 of the Iranian people.

00:35:46.000 The Iranian people? 0.73

00:35:46.000 He'll never, he'll never destroy the soul of a free nation. 0.73

00:35:48.000 Did he just say Iranian?

00:35:50.000 Yes.

00:35:51.000 He will never, never weaken the.

00:35:52.000 Yes.

00:35:52.000 That's like finish your beer.

00:35:53.000 We can't, but you should.

00:35:56.000 He just said Iranian.

00:35:57.000 Well, you know that we don't go to enough countries when you just throw it.

00:36:01.000 Next he calls them the Yemen people.

00:36:03.000 Oh, shoot. 0.99

00:36:04.000 Don't tip your hand, Joe.

00:36:06.000 Why are you giving a standing ovation?

00:36:07.000 Swalwell's like waving the flag.

00:36:08.000 Yes.

00:36:09.000 Yes.

00:36:10.000 He's just waving the Chinese spy's panties. 0.78

00:36:14.000 Yes, because you're here.

00:36:15.000 Or the Iraqis. 1.00

00:36:15.000 It's because of you! 1.00

00:36:16.000 You're the Iraqis. 0.98

00:36:17.000 And so many families are living paycheck to paycheck, struggling to keep up with the rising

00:36:22.000 cost of food, gas, housing, and so much more.

00:36:27.000 I understand, like many of you did.

00:36:29.000 My dad had to leave his home in Scranton, Pennsylvania to find work.

00:36:34.000 So like many of you, I grew up in a family where the price of food went up.

00:36:37.000 It was felt throughout the family.

00:36:39.000 Yeah, 7.5% inflation in the first quarter, I believe, by 2021.

00:36:41.000 That's one of the first things I did as president, was fight to pass the American Rescue Plan.

00:36:46.000 Because people were hurting.

00:36:47.000 I think it's this year, yeah.

00:36:49.000 We needed to act, and we did.

00:36:51.000 Few pieces of legislation have done more at a critical moment in our history to lift us out of a crisis.

00:36:57.000 It fueled our efforts to vaccinate the nation and combat COVID-19.

00:37:02.000 Delivered immediate economic relief to tens of millions of Americans.

00:37:06.000 It helped put food on the table.

00:37:08.000 Remember those long lines of cars waiting for hours just to get a box of food put in their trunk?

00:37:14.000 It cut the cost of health care insurance.

00:37:17.000 And as my dad used to say, it gave the people just a little bit of breathing room.

00:37:22.000 He used to say that?

00:37:23.000 About COVID?

00:37:23.000 About what?

00:37:24.000 Is he talking about Jimmy Carter gas lines?

00:37:25.000 the previous administration.

00:37:27.000 The benefits of the top 100% of America's American rescue plan.

00:37:30.000 I don't know.

00:37:31.000 I don't know.

00:37:32.000 Oh, tax cuts.

00:37:33.000 Oh, look at him.

00:37:34.000 Help working people and left no one behind.

00:37:35.000 Oh my gosh.

00:37:41.000 He's basically saying the tax cuts under Trump were bad.

00:37:43.000 Right, yeah.

00:37:44.000 Even though they worked.

00:37:44.000 Yeah, even though we had record low unemployment, we had crazy high labor force participation.

00:37:48.000 Apparently it benefited black Americans more than your former buddy over there.

00:37:52.000 And right now we have record high inflation.

00:37:55.000 We have no new net added jobs.

00:37:58.000 Keep in mind, zero.

00:38:00.000 Zero jobs have been added since the high of 2019 before the Democrats decided to ensure that a pandemic was thrust upon the world and of course it was covered up.

00:38:08.000 China might have known more than they did.

00:38:10.000 So less than one?

00:38:11.000 Yeah.

00:38:12.000 Less than one.

00:38:12.000 More jobs!

00:38:14.000 Yes, if you fire everybody, and then hire 8 people, it's an 8% increase.

00:38:21.000 Good God.

00:38:21.000 Alright, it's the goldfish from Penn's Labyrinth.

00:38:23.000 The strongest growth rate in 40 years. Good God. The first step in bringing fundamental change to our economy.

00:38:29.000 Alright, it's the goldfish from Penn's Labyrinth.

00:38:31.000 It hasn't worked for working people in this nation for too long.

00:38:33.000 For the past 40 years, we were told that tax break for those at the top and benefits would trickle down and

00:38:39.000 everyone would benefit.

00:38:41.000 But that trickle-down theory led to a weaker economic growth, lower wages, bigger deficits, and a widening gap between the top and everyone else.

00:38:50.000 The average household income in the first three years of Donald Trump was over $5,000 a year.

00:38:55.000 I'm going by road was over five thousand dollars a year under eight years of Obama

00:39:01.000 It was about eleven hundred three years of Donald Trump.

00:39:04.000 You've never seen those kinds of that's across the board.

00:39:07.000 Okay Just to be clear, when he talks about how it didn't trickle down, when he talks about how there was a widening gap between the wealthy- no, the gap widened between the wealthy and the rest of you with COVID!

00:39:16.000 The top five companies in the world added over two trillion dollars!

00:39:21.000 To their- to their ledgers.

00:39:23.000 When the middle class grows, the poor have a way up and the wealthy do very well.

00:39:30.000 America used to have the best roads, bridges, and airports on Earth.

00:39:34.000 And now, our infrastructure is ranked 13th in the world.

00:39:38.000 We won't be able to compete for the jobs of the 21st century if we don't fix it.

00:39:43.000 That's why it was so important to pass the bipartisan infrastructure law.

00:39:48.000 He wears that badge with honor.

00:39:52.000 He should be called Dottie in fixing people their lunch cocktails. 0.99

00:39:56.000 Could I have a softer chair?

00:40:00.000 Could I have an inner tube?

00:40:01.000 It's a bipartisan effort and I want to thank the members of both parties who worked to make it happen.

00:40:08.000 We're done talking about infrastructure weeks.

00:40:10.000 We're now talking about an infrastructure decade.

00:40:13.000 Infrastructure. Drink. Bring back up the drinking rules for people who haven't seen them yet. Again,

00:40:19.000 use the promo code Biden fact check or the hashtag Biden fact check hashtag SOTU, state of the union.

00:40:26.000 To put us in a path to win the economic competition of the 21st century

00:40:30.000 that we face with the rest of the world, particularly China.

00:40:33.000 Oh.

00:40:34.000 I've told Xi Jinping it's never been a good bet to bet against the American people.

00:40:40.000 Really?

00:40:41.000 He's still laughing.

00:40:42.000 He looks like he's farting.

00:40:43.000 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Just bet against you. Not American people. No, no, no, no, no. Just you. 0.96

00:40:48.000 To withstand the devastating effects of climate change and promote environmental justice. He looks like he's farting.

00:40:53.000 He might be.

00:40:53.000 We'll build a national network of 500,000 electric vehicle charging stations. Begin to replace the poisonous lead

00:41:00.000 pipes so every child, every American has clean water to drink at home and at school.

00:41:06.000 Yeah, he just said, he just talked about building electric vehicle charging stations.

00:41:08.000 Hey, hey, hold on. 0.98

00:41:10.000 Former Vice President Joe Biden, how are you going to charge them, dick? 0.98

00:41:14.000 Hey, remember when you visited Flint? 0.99

00:41:16.000 That's still a problem.

00:41:19.000 What?

00:41:19.000 Consumers?

00:41:20.000 Look, Pelosi does a tooth smile, it's the stuff that gets children like me.

00:41:23.000 And Kamala does that smile. 0.99

00:41:24.000 She's mean right there.

00:41:25.000 You should have announced them in your districts.

00:41:27.000 And tonight, I'm announcing that this year, we will start fixing over 65,000 miles of

00:41:33.000 highways and 1,500 bridges in disrepair.

00:41:41.000 I'm sorry, but talking about infrastructure when the world is on fire, I get that it's

00:41:46.000 important, but maybe not tonight.

00:41:47.000 No, let's be honest.

00:41:48.000 Pipes aren't that important.

00:41:50.000 And private companies can do it better.

00:41:51.000 That was green energy and infrastructure. 0.99

00:41:53.000 Oh, shut up! 1.00

00:41:55.000 I need another beer. 1.00

00:41:57.000 Somebody in the studio.

00:42:00.000 By the way, the America Competes bill, just to give you some quick facts, just so you know, the main focus of the bill is engineering biology.

00:42:05.000 This is from congress.gov.

00:42:07.000 $50 billion in subsidies for the semiconductor industry with no guardrails to prevent any funding actually going to China.

00:42:12.000 $78 billion to the National Science Foundation that is completely unrelated to China.

00:42:15.000 $8 billion for the UN Green Climate Fund.

00:42:17.000 It expands the federal government into education, creates apprenticeship programs to edge out private businesses.

00:42:22.000 It calls for more federal money to K-12 education.

00:42:24.000 There's just so much in here that has nothing to do with making America more competitive.

00:42:28.000 At all.

00:42:29.000 Everything from the deck of an aircraft carrier to the steel on highway guardrails is made in America from beginning to end. 0.86

00:42:37.000 All of it.

00:42:38.000 All of it.

00:42:41.000 Two ways to do that.

00:42:43.000 Make this a more business-friendly economy, Donald Trump.

00:42:45.000 Or number two, force American companies to do it, which just ends up resulting with more of them shuttered.

00:42:52.000 We also need to level the playing field with China and other competitors.

00:42:57.000 How do we do that, Joe?

00:42:57.000 That's why it's so important to pass the Bipartisan Innovation Act sitting in Congress that will make record investments in emerging technologies and American manufacturing.

00:43:08.000 Another slur.

00:43:08.000 He meant to say, we is to invest, because he was looking at Clarence Thomas.

00:43:12.000 Hell.

00:43:12.000 Where's to invest we don't know you meant to say we is to invest because he's looking at Clarence Thomas we used

00:43:17.000 We don't know if you travel 20 miles east of Columbus, Ohio You'll find a thousand acres of land

00:43:26.000 It won't look like much it isn't stop and look closely You'll see a field of dreams

00:43:33.000 The ground in which America's future will be built.

00:43:35.000 And if you build it, they'll come.

00:43:37.000 That's where Intel, the American company that's up close to Silicon Valley, is going to build a $20 billion semiconductor megasite.

00:43:47.000 Up to 8 state-of-the-art factories in one place.

00:43:50.000 10,000 new jobs.

00:43:54.000 Why is old Kevin Kline there?

00:43:56.000 You mean old Greg Kinnear?

00:43:57.000 Yes!

00:43:57.000 Sitting behind old Tina Fey.

00:43:58.000 Kevin Kleinman.

00:44:00.000 You mean Old Greg Kinnear?

00:44:02.000 Yes!

00:44:04.000 Sitting behind old Tina Fey.

00:44:06.000 The power of the world in everyday lives.

00:44:10.000 From smart phones, technology, the internet, technology is yet to be invented.

00:44:16.000 But that's just the beginning.

00:44:18.000 Intel CEO Pat Gelsinger, who is here tonight.

00:44:22.000 I don't know where Pat is.

00:44:23.000 Pat, there you go.

00:44:24.000 You looked right to him.

00:44:25.000 You had no idea where he was, did you?

00:44:27.000 That's like baby geniuses.

00:44:29.000 Thank you for coming, Harry. 1.00

00:44:31.000 This fucking Serrano broom. 1.00

00:44:33.000 Thank you, I came from Hogwarts. 1.00

00:44:37.000 Hey, Pat, say hello.

00:44:40.000 I wasn't expecting to speak.

00:44:42.000 He's that guy from Short Circuit.

00:44:43.000 Yes.

00:44:44.000 Shouldn't you be filming a Shriners commercial?

00:44:47.000 That would be the biggest investment in manufacturing in American history.

00:44:51.000 They accidentally cut to a makeover.

00:44:53.000 Forty dames.

00:44:55.000 Oh, yes.

00:44:55.000 Let's not wait any longer.

00:44:57.000 You could have fooled me.

00:44:57.000 Send it to my desk.

00:44:58.000 I'll sign it.

00:45:00.000 And we'll really take off in a big way.

00:45:02.000 Really?

00:45:03.000 By the way, his desk is Fisher Price.

00:45:06.000 No, he just got one from Putin.

00:45:07.000 It's really long now.

00:45:08.000 It sticks out into the West Wing.

00:45:10.000 That guy was actually 60.

00:45:12.000 No, no, the guy on the Shriners commercial.

00:45:15.000 It's 140 yards.

00:45:17.000 Football lines.

00:45:28.000 No, they're not.

00:45:29.000 You're trying to force them to.

00:45:31.000 American manufacturing boomed under Donald Trump.

00:45:38.000 How are you going to power the electric vehicles?

00:45:42.000 When the government forces modern electric vehicles, guess what?

00:45:48.000 Green energy companies don't work when they're forced in by the government.

00:45:52.000 Look at Elon Musk get to leave California.

00:45:54.000 You're talking about millions of jobs and businesses that have had to leave California.

00:45:58.000 Not to mention the Toyota headquarters.

00:45:59.000 They're doing electric vehicles.

00:46:00.000 Why wouldn't they be doing that in California?

00:46:02.000 Eco-friendly.

00:46:03.000 Elon Musk went to Texas.

00:46:05.000 Texas is more friendly to environmentally friendly jobs than California.

00:46:10.000 We all want cleaner energy.

00:46:12.000 Yours just doesn't work.

00:46:14.000 Who's here tonight?

00:46:15.000 Where are you, Jojo?

00:46:17.000 There you go.

00:46:17.000 Thanks, buddy.

00:46:20.000 There's Ohio.

00:46:22.000 He's like, I'm just the postman.

00:46:27.000 He's a trainer, not that kind of trainer though.

00:46:29.000 He's the janitor from Rudy's?

00:46:33.000 Oh look, he's sitting next to the guy they showed earlier.

00:46:35.000 Rust Belt! It's time to sign the what used to be called...

00:46:42.000 Rust Belt become the home of significant resurgence of manufacturing.

00:46:49.000 And with all the bright spots in our economy, record job growth, higher wages.

00:46:58.000 Too many families are struggling to keep up with their bills.

00:47:01.000 Inflation is robbing them of gains they would be able to feel.

00:47:09.000 That's why my top priority is getting prices under control.

00:47:12.000 Our economy roared back faster than almost anyone predicted.

00:47:17.000 But the pandemic meant that businesses had a hard time hiring new people because of the pandemic to keep up production in their factories.

00:47:25.000 So you didn't have people making those beams that went into buildings because they were out.

00:47:30.000 He just said beams that went into buildings.

00:47:32.000 Beams?

00:47:33.000 Yeah, he said beams, Frank.

00:47:34.000 Does he get a point for not saying jumping beams?

00:47:37.000 Are these beams all beams?

00:47:38.000 When that happens, it takes longer to make goods and get them to the warehouses, to the stores, and the prices go up.

00:47:44.000 He's making an observative argument now.

00:47:46.000 Inflation affects everything, including Americans at the pump, and including everything that needs to be shipped, right?

00:47:50.000 Something that we've talked about in the past.

00:47:51.000 That's why we should be more dependent on our own oil and natural gas reserves.

00:47:54.000 He's making that case, and then he's going to say, by the way, that means that the government who printed more money, the government who devalued the dollar, the government decided to create record-high unemployment and current inflation, which is an inflation scenario.

00:48:05.000 We're gonna fix it.

00:48:06.000 How?

00:48:07.000 Mandates.

00:48:08.000 I think I have a better idea to fight inflation.

00:48:10.000 Yeah, let's hear it.

00:48:11.000 Lower your costs, not your wages.

00:48:14.000 I'm sorry?

00:48:15.000 You know what happens when you lower costs?

00:48:17.000 More profit.

00:48:17.000 right now have been shuddering in record levels.

00:48:20.000 You think restaurants right now who are coming, yeah, let's just lower our costs.

00:48:23.000 There's some Iranian who he supports, like, I am still sitting on, like,

00:48:27.000 five pounds of shrimp that hasn't been used.

00:48:29.000 You know what happens when you lower costs?

00:48:31.000 More profit. 1.00

00:48:33.000 You don't typically lower your price as well, you idiot. 1.00

00:48:37.000 Well, we're paying more for cheese and pepperoni and such. 1.00

00:48:40.000 What do you think we should do?

00:48:41.000 Lower prices.

00:48:42.000 That makes sense.

00:48:43.000 What do you want to do after that?

00:48:46.000 I don't know. 0.98

00:48:47.000 Shoot myself and my whole family? 0.98

00:48:50.000 I got time on my hands. 0.99

00:48:54.000 Starting with you, Jill.

00:48:55.000 She's just like, oh boy! 0.99

00:48:57.000 I quit my corporate job in 2019 to follow this dream.

00:49:01.000 Hey, Jill, what happens when you mix red and blue?

00:49:03.000 You're gonna be looking turquoise after tonight.

00:49:07.000 What?

00:49:07.000 Philadelphia Shotgun.

00:49:08.000 Well, and you, by the way, you're right.

00:49:09.000 7.5% inflation at the end of 2021 carried over into January 2022.

00:49:13.000 I think overall it's been over 6% under his presidency.

00:49:16.000 What are we going into March?

00:49:19.000 Nine.

00:49:21.000 Nine?!

00:49:21.000 Are we nine?

00:49:22.000 For real?

00:49:22.000 No, I'm just kidding.

00:49:23.000 We'll see.

00:49:23.000 Alright, let's see.

00:49:26.000 Seventeen Nobel laureates in economics said my plan will ease long-term inflationary pressures.

00:49:33.000 Top business leaders, and I believe most Americans, support the plan.

00:49:37.000 And here's the plan.

00:49:38.000 That's wrong.

00:49:38.000 First, cut the cost of prescription drugs.

00:49:42.000 Hey, didn't Donald Trump, wasn't he the first president in modern history, let's fact check this, to actually cut the cost of prescription drugs?

00:49:49.000 He was the first president to do that.

00:49:51.000 They've all run on it.

00:49:52.000 They've all run on it.

00:49:53.000 Donald Trump did it.

00:49:55.000 Just look at insulin.

00:49:58.000 1 in 10 Americans has diabetes.

00:50:00.000 Virginia, I met a 13-year-old boy, the handsome young man standing up there, Joshua Davis.

00:50:09.000 He and his dad both have type 1 diabetes, which means they need insulin every single day.

00:50:18.000 Insulin costs about $10 a vial to make.

00:50:21.000 That's what it costs the pharmaceutical company.

00:50:25.000 But drug companies charge families like Joshua and his dad up to 30 times that amount.

00:50:31.000 Hey, how much did you give to Pfizer?

00:50:34.000 We have that number?

00:50:34.000 How many hundreds of millions of dollars were given from this government to pharmaceutical companies?

00:50:38.000 By the way, with carte blanche, no requirement to pay back the American people for footing the bill.

00:50:43.000 And by the way, reduce liabilities so you can't sue them when damage is done.

00:50:46.000 Oh, now we're back to vilifying pharmaceutical companies that are making money on other drugs.

00:50:50.000 Okay, I understand.

00:50:50.000 I just want to make sure I understand the rulebook.

00:50:52.000 See?

00:50:52.000 Remember I talked about this money this Monday.

00:50:55.000 This is what happened with already drinking the drinking game.

00:50:56.000 I'm sounding like former Vice President Joe Biden.

00:50:58.000 Talked about this Monday.

00:50:59.000 It is entirely inconsistent to vilify pharmaceutical companies and then support

00:51:03.000 the course of action that you've seen from this presidency and former vice presidency

00:51:07.000 with the vaccines.

00:51:08.000 And 200,000 other young people with type 1 diabetes.

00:51:13.000 It's disgusting.

00:51:15.000 You allow people to invest in buying that at $10 so then they can sell it to people that are sick and need it to live at 300 times the cost because of him and because of, really, Clinton who lacks the drug laws to begin with. 0.69

00:51:28.000 And insurance companies.

00:51:29.000 Yes.

00:51:29.000 Because now there's so much red tape they have to charge you so much because they have to have so many people on staff.

00:51:33.000 Who, by the way, got the biggest kickback in the history of mankind.

00:51:36.000 Insurance companies.

00:51:36.000 In the history of insurance companies under Obamacare.

00:51:43.000 Are you going to throw up?

00:51:45.000 Oh, for premiums.

00:51:46.000 What happened?

00:51:46.000 drugs. Oh goodness. Look, the American Rescue Plan is helping millions of families with

00:51:51.000 Affordable Care Act plans to save them $2,400 a year on their health premiums. Let's close

00:51:57.000 the coverage gap and make these savings permanent. What happened? He said, premium. Hey, by the

00:52:05.000 way, Pelosi there. I'm just glad I have this family.

00:52:09.000 An average of $500 a year by combating climate change.

00:52:12.000 Let's provide an investment tax credit to weatherize your home and your business.

00:52:17.000 To be energy efficient and get a tax credit for it.

00:52:22.000 I thought you were just upset about tax breaks!

00:52:27.000 I will say this though, credit to her makeup artist.

00:52:31.000 They definitely made her eyes look less googly. 1.00

00:52:33.000 That's true.

00:52:35.000 Gee, I sure hope her boyfriends feed her there. 1.00

00:52:38.000 You just want to have sex with me. 0.99

00:52:40.000 The only thing we can do to change the standard of living for hardworking folks 0.98

00:52:44.000 is cut the cost of child care.

00:52:46.000 Hey, how about you make it so they don't have to pay for child care 0.98

00:52:51.000 because everything's so expensive and they have to work double, triple shifts, dummy. 0.52

00:52:56.000 Thank you.

00:52:57.000 Let the government raise your kids forever.

00:52:59.000 Hey guys out there, I've run out.

00:53:02.000 Give me a devil's backbone. 0.99

00:53:03.000 I'll need something stiffer.

00:53:05.000 I was a single dad for five years raising two kids.

00:53:08.000 I had a lot of help though.

00:53:09.000 What?

00:53:11.000 What?

00:53:12.000 He was a single dad?

00:53:13.000 I didn't know that.

00:53:13.000 Hey, by the way, do you know where that money comes from?

00:53:15.000 middle class and working folks shouldn't have to pay more than 7% of their income to care 0.88

00:53:19.000 for the young children.

00:53:20.000 My plan...

00:53:21.000 I mean Hunter killed it.

00:53:22.000 Hey, by the way, do you know where that money comes from?

00:53:25.000 They're going to take all of your money and use that. 0.96

00:53:29.000 Yeah, that's nasty.

00:53:33.000 Didn't win.

00:53:33.000 Couldn't have given him that float in Portia.

00:53:35.000 I couldn't have done it.

00:53:35.000 I thought it was tough enough.

00:53:37.000 I don't know.

00:53:37.000 to give him the afforded child care to be able to get back to work.

00:53:41.000 Wrong one, dad.

00:53:42.000 Generating economic growth.

00:53:43.000 But my plan doesn't stop there.

00:53:45.000 It also includes home and long-term care. 0.99

00:53:47.000 You wouldn't know economic growth if it bit you on the sterile scrotum. 1.00

00:53:51.000 Or in the dead left hemisphere of your brain. 1.00

00:53:54.000 Hey, by the way, can we fact check? 0.64

00:53:55.000 What is the exact presidential salary?

00:53:56.000 Nobody, let me say this again, nobody earning less than $400,000 a year will pay an additional

00:54:03.000 penny in new taxes.

00:54:04.000 Hey, by the way, can we fact check?

00:54:06.000 What is the exact presidential salary?

00:54:07.000 Yeah.

00:54:08.000 Don't you love that?

00:54:10.000 400,000!

00:54:10.000 Yeah, that's the magic number.

00:54:13.000 Like, hey, maybe we should make it so only people under over 300,000 should pay more.

00:54:16.000 Does that include bonuses?

00:54:16.000 No!

00:54:19.000 No?

00:54:20.000 Gifts?

00:54:23.000 How about insider trading?

00:54:24.000 That's why he's going into Russia to get jets.

00:54:29.000 Let's make corporations and wealthy Americans start paying their fair share. 0.97

00:54:33.000 Oh, the fair share argument!

00:54:35.000 Ah, okay, okay, okay.

00:54:36.000 Wealthy Americans pay 27 times.

00:54:38.000 Hey, there's a Pocahontas. 0.99

00:54:40.000 Oh.

00:54:41.000 It's an old stat, so it's probably more now.

00:54:43.000 Define fair share, Joe.

00:54:45.000 He's thinking my golden retriever could give a better speech than this.

00:54:47.000 Oh, yeah.

00:54:49.000 We come from the land of corporate America.

00:54:52.000 There you go, salary.

00:54:53.000 There's a $400,000.

00:54:55.000 Every other state in America combined.

00:54:58.000 And I still won 36 years in a row.

00:55:00.000 The point is, even they understand you should pay just a fair share.

00:55:05.000 What's that?

00:55:05.000 Last year, 55 of the Fortune 500 companies earned $40 billion in profit and paid zero in federal taxes.

00:55:14.000 Can we bring up that fact check, guys?

00:55:16.000 Under the pandemic, the top 5 or top 10 wealthiest Americans or the top companies, what their net worth, I believe it was, or their assets, increased $2 billion.

00:55:24.000 You don't need to do that, give it, have them send it to the control room to you.

00:55:27.000 That's the problem, right?

00:55:28.000 When you have a fundamentally Controlled economy.

00:55:32.000 Right, a manipulated economy.

00:55:33.000 Guess what?

00:55:35.000 The big guys went, why do you think big banks support Democrats?

00:55:38.000 Why do you think Apple, Amazon, Google, YouTube, Twitter, Facebook, all of these companies support Democrats?

00:55:45.000 Again, it's inconsistent to try and say, oh, corporate interests, but then not recognize that the most powerful companies that have ever existed, oil companies, no!

00:55:54.000 Not even close.

00:55:55.000 Support what he's saying.

00:55:56.000 Because they make more money.

00:55:58.000 It hurts middle-sized businesses.

00:56:00.000 It hurts small businesses and everybody knows it.

00:56:01.000 You can look at the numbers.

00:56:03.000 All references available at lottocreditor.com.

00:56:04.000 Bring it up.

00:56:05.000 We all know we've got to make changes.

00:56:09.000 Changes!

00:56:11.000 Who has to make changes?

00:56:13.000 He has to get changed.

00:56:15.000 Go to an intermission and just a bunch of depends.

00:56:19.000 Let's all go to the lobby!

00:56:22.000 What do you mean?

00:56:22.000 Get off Xanax and alcohol and everything else people have been afraid of for two years?

00:56:30.000 Worried about everything?

00:56:31.000 Losing their lives?

00:56:32.000 Yeah, we only need a change.

00:56:34.000 I think this administration not only ballooned the deficit with those tax cuts for the very

00:56:37.000 wealthy corporations...

00:56:38.000 Oh, he's going to lower it.

00:56:41.000 Speaking of which, is your dog still biting everybody who takes a White House tour?

00:56:45.000 Frick? 0.82

00:56:45.000 being wasted. Remember we had those debates? 0.82

00:56:47.000 Speaking of which, is your dog still biting everybody who takes a White House tour?

00:56:50.000 Pricks.

00:56:51.000 How much money was being spent? Where was it going to the right place?

00:56:54.000 According to my administration, the watchdogs are back.

00:56:58.000 We're going to go out and criminalize yourself. 0.96

00:57:02.000 Billions of relief money meant for small business and millions of Americans.

00:57:07.000 Tonight I'm announcing that the Justice Department will soon name a chief prosecutor for pandemic fraud.

00:57:16.000 So how about this, former vice president, you first.

00:57:21.000 Hey, is Fauci on that list when he said it occurred in nature, it did not come from the Wuhan lab?

00:57:27.000 Is that?

00:57:28.000 This year the deficit will be down to less than half of what it was before I took office.

00:57:32.000 Really?

00:57:32.000 Yeah.

00:57:33.000 The only president ever to cut the deficit by more than one trillion dollars in a single year.

00:57:38.000 That's not true at all.

00:57:39.000 Lowering your cost also meant demanding more competition.

00:57:42.000 Did he just claim he lowered the deficit by one trillion?

00:57:45.000 He says he will by the end of this year.

00:57:47.000 Oh, okay.

00:57:48.000 Capitalism.

00:57:49.000 Capitalism without competition.

00:57:51.000 No, he said billion!

00:57:52.000 One billion!

00:57:55.000 Joe, that's not the number we discussed.

00:57:57.000 What was the number we discussed?

00:57:59.000 Negative trillion.

00:58:02.000 They're profits go up and your prices go up and they don't have to compete.

00:58:05.000 Look, small businesses in fact- Am I not turtley enough for the Turtles Club?

00:58:08.000 I need to talk to some of my Republican friends.

00:58:10.000 That is a lot of beer there.

00:58:11.000 Guess what?

00:58:13.000 You got four basic meatpacking facilities.

00:58:16.000 That's it.

00:58:17.000 You play with them, you don't get to play at all.

00:58:19.000 You pay a hell of a lot more.

00:58:22.000 A hell of a lot more because there's only four.

00:58:25.000 See what's happening with ocean carriers and moving goods in and out of America.

00:58:29.000 During the pandemic, Show him with me hacking!

00:58:32.000 with me back in half.

00:58:34.000 Your own companies raised prices by as much as 1,000%

00:58:38.000 and made record profits.

00:58:40.000 Tonight, I'm announcing a crackdown on those companies overcharging American

00:58:44.000 businesses and consumers.

00:58:46.000 Hey, don't you see this?

00:58:48.000 All of this is punishing American businesses who he's harmed and accepting no responsibility.

00:58:53.000 You're just deciding nebulously they're overcharging?

00:58:56.000 Yeah.

00:58:56.000 Why did prices all of a sudden go up and why did it happen to coincide with record inflation, gas prices, unemployment?

00:59:03.000 You think it's just because they decided they could screw people who, by the way, couldn't pay those fees anyway? 1.00

00:59:08.000 It's as stupid as the idea of predatory lending. 0.99

00:59:11.000 You think people are going to restaurants because the prices are too high? 1.00

00:59:16.000 That's what happened for two years?

00:59:19.000 me going strong and giving workers a fair shot.

00:59:22.000 So in other words, New York wasn't because you put the tables out in the street and people

00:59:25.000 were getting hit by taxi cabs?

00:59:29.000 Let's pass the Paycheck Fairness Act and pay leave.

00:59:35.000 It's already $15.

00:59:37.000 Dunkin' Donuts right down the street right now is paying $15 an hour to start.

00:59:40.000 No one has to raise a family in poverty.

00:59:43.000 Oh, because $15 an hour is not poverty?

00:59:46.000 $30k is all it takes for you to raise a family, Joe?

00:59:50.000 It's McDonald's down the street that paid more than Hitmen made in the 80s.

00:59:54.000 Well, the best Hitmen.

00:59:56.000 Accepted.

00:59:58.000 It wasn't Timothy Olyphant.

00:59:59.000 Yeah, I'm not saying it's the best.

01:00:02.000 I was proud of the crumb, but they got the job done.

01:00:05.000 Here's what he's saying.

01:00:05.000 I'll sum it up for you.

01:00:06.000 The government knows best and we're going to send money from your paycheck to everybody we vote for.

01:00:10.000 By the way, have you seen the fight for $15 an hour?

01:00:13.000 Now they've got a plan to strike for $25 an hour. 0.55

01:00:16.000 Guys, bring that up. 0.67

01:00:17.000 There was a flyer being passed out for all McDonald's workers to strike until they got $25 an hour.

01:00:22.000 Because guess what happens with inflation?

01:00:24.000 You just need to pay more.

01:00:26.000 $15 an hour is not what it would have been last year.

01:00:31.000 Who sit at a dining room table or a kitchen table and look at an empty chair.

01:00:35.000 Yeah, yours.

01:00:37.000 Because they lost somebody.

01:00:39.000 Is he fake now?

01:00:39.000 But I also know this.

01:00:41.000 Because of the progress we've made, because of your resilience, and the tools that we have been

01:00:47.000 provided by this Congress, the vaccine that you said you wouldn't take, that one, I think we're

01:00:51.000 moving forward safely, back to a more normal routine. Thank you on the prompt and a new movement.

01:00:58.000 TripAdvisor's commercials with the lawn gnomes.

01:01:00.000 What a pacemaker shot.

01:01:06.000 Two days ago, the Center for Disease Control and Prevention issued a new mask guideline.

01:01:11.000 Under new guidelines, most Americans and most of the country can now go mask-free.

01:01:18.000 We've been doing that for a couple of years now, Joe.

01:01:20.000 Based on projections.

01:01:20.000 Wait, you say that like it's a good thing.

01:01:22.000 Based on projections.

01:01:23.000 Hey, it is! 1.00

01:01:24.000 You're the assholes who want- You have guys in masks there! 1.00

01:01:26.000 So you're gonna say, how are we mask-free? 1.00

01:01:28.000 Look to your right and left.

01:01:29.000 Based on progress we've made in the past year, COVID-19 no longer needs to control our lives.

01:01:34.000 I know some are talking about living with COVID-19.

01:01:38.000 But tonight, I say that we never will just accept living with COVID-19.

01:01:42.000 Oh, please, double down. 0.99

01:01:43.000 We'll continue to combat the virus as we do other diseases.

01:01:47.000 And because this virus mutates and spreads, we have to stay on guard.

01:01:51.000 Which means you live with it.

01:01:53.000 Yes!

01:01:54.000 Now you're back.

01:01:55.000 Right.

01:01:56.000 I love it.

01:01:56.000 Oh, sure.

01:01:57.000 I shouldn't have taken that circular logic course in college.

01:02:02.000 Here's his vaccine promo.

01:02:06.000 Oh, it's double.

01:02:08.000 We'll never give up on vaccinating more Americans. 0.81

01:02:11.000 All right, Frank.

01:02:12.000 Now, I know parents of kids under five are eager to see their vaccines authorized by the way.

01:02:15.000 No, we're not!

01:02:16.000 Kids under five, no!

01:02:16.000 Scientists are working hard to get that done.

01:02:18.000 By the way, the CDC withheld the vaccine effectiveness, the data on it with the boosters, ages 18 to 40, let alone what we don't know anything with people who are five years old.

01:02:27.000 When the CDC first published a significant, we have this from the New York Times overlay, Significant data on the effectiveness of boosters in adults younger than 65 two weeks ago.

01:02:33.000 It left out the numbers for a huge portion of that population.

01:02:37.000 18 to 49 year olds, the group least likely to benefit from extra shots.

01:02:40.000 And by the way, there's a curve where people who are least likely to benefit from the shots, people who get younger. 0.93

01:02:44.000 We don't even have the data on five-year-olds because it's retarded! 1.00

01:02:50.000 So people can get tested at a pharmacy and if they prove positive, receive the antiviral pills on the spot at no cost.

01:02:57.000 Hey, who's generating the testing kits, Joe?

01:02:59.000 Who's generating the boosters?

01:03:01.000 The pharmaceutical companies you just vilified for insulin.

01:03:06.000 There's nothing consistent about it.

01:03:07.000 You can't be consistent.

01:03:09.000 Do they have to release the data 75 years from now still, or can we get it maybe next week?

01:03:13.000 I don't know.

01:03:13.000 He's planning on all of us being beholden to Skynet.

01:03:17.000 We're leaving no one behind or ignoring anyone's needs as we move forward.

01:03:21.000 On testing, we've made hundreds of millions of tests available and you can order them for free to your doorstep.

01:03:28.000 And we've already ordered free tests.

01:03:30.000 If you've already ordered free tests tonight, I'm announcing that you can order another group of tests.

01:03:34.000 Go to covidtest.gov.

01:03:34.000 Start it next week and you can get more tests.

01:03:37.000 Just stumble through them.

01:03:39.000 If you order them tonight you can get them eight years after we cure the virus.

01:03:43.000 It's very exciting.

01:03:45.000 Over the past we've gotten much better at detecting new variants.

01:03:49.000 What's this guy?

01:03:50.000 What the hell is this? 0.84

01:03:51.000 I couldn't have worn that Ukrainian scarf. 1.00

01:03:53.000 That's it with cheap scarves.

01:03:55.000 I thought it looks good.

01:03:56.000 Those Duke LaGrosse players were innocent.

01:03:58.000 We'll have new stockpiles of tests, masks, pills, ready if needed.

01:04:03.000 I can't promise a new variant won't come, but I can promise you... What?

01:04:07.000 We'll do everything within our power to be ready if it does.

01:04:11.000 So you mean you won't have more than 100,000 people killed on top of Trump?

01:04:17.000 So Donald Trump was what, like 420-something thousand and his was 520-something thousand people dying under his watch?

01:04:22.000 Under, keep in mind, the least deadly variant, Omicron.

01:04:25.000 Bill Gates said what I said.

01:04:26.000 He said that Omicron is responsible for saving more lives than the vaccine.

01:04:30.000 He said it, not us.

01:04:30.000 No, I said it, then Bill Gates said it.

01:04:32.000 We're doing that here in the federal government.

01:04:35.000 The vast majority of federal workers once again work in person.

01:04:39.000 Our schools are open.

01:04:40.000 Let's keep it that way.

01:04:41.000 Our kids need to be in school.

01:04:43.000 Hey! 0.99

01:04:44.000 Hey! 0.99

01:04:44.000 Who's been saying that for several years? 0.99

01:04:46.000 Everyone's now standing and clapping?

01:04:48.000 Yes!

01:04:49.000 Schools should stay open!

01:04:50.000 Oh, really?

01:04:51.000 Okay.

01:04:52.000 By the way, I just see that one lady in red. 1.00

01:04:53.000 She's wearing a tarp.

01:04:55.000 Yes.

01:04:56.000 And 75% of adult Americans are fully vaccinated.

01:05:03.000 He reached in the wrong pocket.

01:05:06.000 HE REACHED IN HIS POCKET FOR A MASK!

01:05:08.000 DID YOU SEE THAT?

01:05:10.000 HE REACHED IN ONE POCKET, THE OTHER POCKET!

01:05:15.000 BRINK! 0.96

01:05:16.000 THAT'S CERTAINLY A FLUB!

01:05:17.000 HE THOUGHT HE HAD A MASK!

01:05:18.000 It's like if Gallagher didn't bring out his watermelon!

01:05:24.000 Where's my mouth?

01:05:24.000 This is the COVID-O-Matic.

01:05:25.000 I'm gonna crush it. 0.96

01:05:25.000 No, they said Jews in these tools. 0.96

01:05:27.000 Why?!

01:05:27.000 majority of Americans have used these tools may want again.

01:05:32.000 No they said use any tool. I expect Congress I hope you'll pass that quickly.

01:05:36.000 What? Fourth, huh? We'll continue vaccinating the world. And B. Jews indeed. We've 1.00

01:05:40.000 sent 475 million vaccine doses to a hundred and twelve countries. Why? Any nation on earth.

01:05:47.000 Why?

01:05:48.000 Pelosi's so strong.

01:05:50.000 And by the way, don't you love that we sent?

01:05:52.000 No, you gave that money to a private company who developed it.

01:05:55.000 By the way, a vaccine that you said you wouldn't trust and you wouldn't take.

01:05:58.000 All three of them on that stage.

01:06:00.000 That there's no way we would get a vaccine within two years that they wouldn't trust if it was developed under Donald Trump and they wouldn't take it.

01:06:05.000 You gave that money to a private company, by the way, privatizing profits because the American taxpayers don't get a share of those profits.

01:06:12.000 And then that company sent it overseas. 0.98

01:06:15.000 Oh, shut up. 0.99

01:06:16.000 That was great in the lab. 1.00

01:06:16.000 Really? 1.00

01:06:16.000 There's a partisan dividing line. 1.00

01:06:18.000 Oh, shut up. 1.00

01:06:19.000 See it for what it is. 1.00

01:06:20.000 A god awful disease.

01:06:22.000 It was created in the last...

01:06:23.000 Let's stop seeing each other as enemies.

01:06:25.000 Really?

01:06:26.000 Let's start seeing each other for who we are.

01:06:28.000 Enemies.

01:06:29.000 Fellow Americans.

01:06:30.000 No, you sold that to the Americans.

01:06:33.000 No, they pushed that for a year and a half, and they have said everything they can to make you hate somebody who doesn't wear a mask.

01:06:38.000 Here's the problem.

01:06:39.000 No, we have enemies.

01:06:40.000 It's called China.

01:06:41.000 They lied about it.

01:06:42.000 Fauci knew about it.

01:06:43.000 Fauci also hid it.

01:06:45.000 And Fauci also threatened other doctors who tried to point out his lies.

01:06:48.000 We have these emails.

01:06:49.000 We have enemies.

01:06:51.000 Look, we have plenty of friends.

01:06:53.000 We could use a few enemies.

01:06:54.000 We're looking at you, Wuhan COVID-19 generating lab.

01:07:00.000 I recently visited New York City Police Department days after the funerals of Officer... Is that before or after you supported the people who threw a Molotov cocktail through their precinct?

01:07:08.000 He just said Ossoffer like he was talking himself out of the DUI.

01:07:11.000 Officer Moore was 27 years old.

01:07:12.000 Officer Rivera was 22 years old.

01:07:20.000 Both Dominican Americans who grew up in the same streets that they later chose to patrol as police officers.

01:07:28.000 Son of a... They were Dominican. 1.00

01:07:30.000 It's related.

01:07:31.000 I told them they were forever in debt for their sacrifices and will carry on their mission to restore the trust and safety in every community deserves.

01:07:40.000 What?

01:07:41.000 Like some of you that have been around for a while.

01:07:44.000 I've worked with you on these issues for a long time. 1.00

01:07:47.000 You worked with the party who said defund the police, you son of a bitch! 1.00

01:07:53.000 The one behind you said to keep doing it. 1.00

01:07:55.000 This is raised money for serial rapists and felons and their GoFundMe!

01:08:00.000 And she banged the mayor! 1.00

01:08:04.000 Let's come together and protect our communities, restore trust, and hold law enforcement accountable.

01:08:10.000 That's why the Justice Department has required body cameras, ban chokeholds, and restricted no-knocks warrants for its officers.

01:08:18.000 That's why the American Rescue Plan that you all provided, $350 billion, That cities, states, and counties can use to hire more police, invest in more proven strategies.

01:08:30.000 Well, Pelosi's praying to George Floyd right now, too.

01:08:33.000 Yes, that's true.

01:08:34.000 Thank you, George Floyd!

01:08:36.000 He's looking down at the clap break.

01:08:37.000 Yes.

01:08:38.000 Where do I clap again?

01:08:39.000 She also has a peppermint schnapps IV going into her leg.

01:08:43.000 Just has a triple sec patch. Awful mom from Arrested Development. 1.00

01:08:54.000 Oh, really?

01:08:54.000 It's to fund the police.

01:08:56.000 Whoa, whoa, whoa!

01:08:57.000 What did he just say?

01:08:58.000 The answer is not to defund the police.

01:08:59.000 The answer is to fund the police.

01:09:01.000 And Kamala Harris just stood for that? 1.00

01:09:04.000 Yeah.

01:09:04.000 Hold on a second.

01:09:05.000 You have someone who encouraged people to continue rioting behind him, and you have a lady who prayed to the deity of George Floyd stand for funding the police more. 0.98

01:09:14.000 Screw you all!

01:09:15.000 Are you starting to get the picture? 1.00

01:09:17.000 Democrats and Republicans alike, to pass my budget and keep our neighborhoods safe.

01:09:22.000 Kamala's pissed. 1.00

01:09:23.000 She's like, I can't believe you made me stand for that shit. 1.00

01:09:25.000 Joe! 1.00

01:09:26.000 Joe!

01:09:26.000 I'm looking forward to defunding the police ice cream.

01:09:29.000 Assemble at home. 1.00

01:09:31.000 I'm just waiting for Kamala to blow her leg like, hey Joe, shut the fuck up! 1.00

01:09:36.000 Do you know what we said? 1.00

01:09:37.000 It wasn't that long ago.

01:09:38.000 It's on tape. 1.00

01:09:39.000 You're making us look like assholes, Joe. 0.99

01:09:41.000 This is in the Tupac in the 70s. 0.99

01:09:46.000 That's a weird clap.

01:09:48.000 You think if you get it closer to him he can hear?

01:09:50.000 He's going after the Second Amendment.

01:09:51.000 Okay, here we go.

01:09:52.000 He's using it.

01:09:53.000 He's acting like he's in church.

01:09:54.000 Thank you, thank you.

01:09:55.000 Watching us are speaking in tongues.

01:09:56.000 I believe the ball fell off her nose.

01:09:58.000 You think the deer are wearing Kevlar vests?

01:10:02.000 No, I think that Russia might invade, Joe!

01:10:04.000 That's not true. 1.00

01:10:05.000 Vaccine companies, dumbass! 1.00

01:10:05.000 is the only industry in America that can't be sued. The only one. That's not true. That's 1.00

01:10:10.000 vaccine companies dumbass. Imagine had we done that with the tobacco manufacturers. 0.99

01:10:14.000 Tobacco lied. Hold on a second guys. I have to fact remind me to come back to the suing of gun

01:10:21.000 companies and comparing it to the vaccine companies because yeah he lied. Vaccine companies can't be

01:10:26.000 sued. The manufacturers of vaccines and the difference is those can cause direct harm.

01:10:29.000 Gun companies can be sued if a guy purchased a gun from a local gun shop and then sue Walther, Smith & Wesson, Ruger, even though that's not what it was designed for.

01:10:39.000 Whereas a vaccine can be designed to be injected into someone's body, cause direct damage, and they can't be sued.

01:10:44.000 Okay, let's go.

01:10:46.000 President Michael Moore blames Kmart for Columbine?

01:10:48.000 Right.

01:10:49.000 Yeah, yeah, you know what?

01:10:51.000 You first.

01:10:51.000 Teacher's unions.

01:10:53.000 Pfizer?

01:10:53.000 So Americans know who's funding our election.

01:10:56.000 Look.

01:10:57.000 Yeah, yeah, you know what?

01:10:58.000 You first.

01:10:59.000 Tonight, Teachers Union.

01:11:00.000 I mean, Pfizer, a pharmaceutical company.

01:11:01.000 Someone who dedicated his life to serving this country.

01:11:04.000 Justice Breyer, an Army veteran. 0.99

01:11:07.000 His ice cream sucked. 0.99

01:11:08.000 Constitutional scholar. 0.99

01:11:09.000 Very bad.

01:11:10.000 Retiring Justice of the United States Supreme Court.

01:11:11.000 Karma's pretty good.

01:11:12.000 Justice Breyer, thank you for your service.

01:11:15.000 This is Nick Gunn in color.

01:11:17.000 We're gonna have somebody just like you, except not at all like you, replace you.

01:11:22.000 He looks like a ladybug who lost her shell.

01:11:24.000 Oh, thank you so much.

01:11:28.000 It's been great!

01:11:29.000 Oh, I love it!

01:11:30.000 Oh my god!

01:11:31.000 I had no idea Brian was gay!

01:11:32.000 This has been inconceivable!

01:11:35.000 You just see Pete Buttigieg's head pop up?

01:11:37.000 What?

01:11:37.000 Huh?

01:11:37.000 What?

01:11:37.000 Here we go.

01:11:38.000 Here we go.

01:11:39.000 Katanji! 0.97

01:11:39.000 I've nominated someone to serve on the United States Supreme Court. 0.97

01:11:43.000 I'm sitting next to him now.

01:11:45.000 As I did four days ago, I've nominated a Circuit Court of Appeals, Ketanji Brown Jackson.

01:11:52.000 Ketanji Brown!

01:11:53.000 One of our nation's top legal minds.

01:11:54.000 Is that Jackson Brown?

01:11:55.000 I'm sorry, Jackson Brown.

01:11:57.000 Is that Jackson Brown?

01:12:01.000 I'm sorry, hold on.

01:12:01.000 You said top legal mind.

01:12:03.000 I thought you said you were going to nominate a black female. 0.98

01:12:06.000 Well, that can be a top legal mind. 0.70

01:12:07.000 Yeah, but he didn't say that when he said he was going to nominate somebody.

01:12:10.000 Well, I know.

01:12:11.000 He should have said both.

01:12:13.000 He didn't.

01:12:14.000 Sorry.

01:12:15.000 They left for other reasons. 1.00

01:12:16.000 That's so stupid. 1.00

01:12:21.000 Including the Fraternal Order of Police. 0.99

01:12:25.000 By the way, this broad he's talking about, 2001, Jackson co-authored an amicus briefing in support of a law that would actually stop pro-life activists from speaking to women outside of abortion clinics.

01:12:35.000 Oh, really?

01:12:36.000 From speaking to women outside of abortion clinics.

01:12:38.000 And they sign?

01:12:39.000 Right.

01:12:39.000 That's it?

01:12:41.000 No, just talking signs.

01:12:42.000 So, this is someone who actively has fought against First Amendment rights.

01:12:46.000 If you don't like people who are pro-life, fine.

01:12:49.000 If you actually believe that you should ban people from speaking outside of abortion clinics, then you don't believe in the First Amendment.

01:12:57.000 This is the broad he chose. 0.85

01:12:58.000 We've installed new technology like cutting-edge scanners.

01:13:01.000 Oh, he moved on quickly from the Supreme Court nominee.

01:13:03.000 Want to know why?

01:13:04.000 Because that's all he could read on her resume.

01:13:05.000 We set up a toy patrol in Mexico and Guatemala to catch more human traffickers.

01:13:09.000 We're putting in place dedicated immigration judges, a significant larger number, so families fleeing persecution and violence can have their cases heard faster than those who don't legitimately represent them.

01:13:22.000 We're securing commitments and supporting partners in South and Central America to host more refugees and secure their own borders.

01:13:29.000 We can do all this while keeping lit the torch of liberty that has led the generation of immigrants to this land.

01:13:35.000 My four bearers and many of yours.

01:13:38.000 I love how he's treating the Statue of Liberty like it's a bug zapper.

01:13:43.000 Farm workers.

01:13:47.000 Essential workers, I mean.

01:13:48.000 Did you hear him?

01:13:49.000 He called immigrants farm workers.

01:13:52.000 That's all they are to you, Joe!

01:13:53.000 Which I guess is 112.

01:13:54.000 Yeah.

01:13:54.000 They use the N-word like 9 times if they're Clarence Thomas.

01:13:57.000 Oh, in the context you don't want to.

01:13:58.000 And he used the N-word like nine times in Clarence Thomas.

01:14:01.000 ...labor unions, the religious leaders, to the U.S. Chamber of Commerce.

01:14:03.000 In the context you don't want to.

01:14:05.000 Let's get it done once and for all.

01:14:07.000 But context doesn't matter unless it's for anyone else.

01:14:09.000 Folks...

01:14:11.000 We've already done this before, Jay.

01:14:13.000 By the way, that's his cue.

01:14:14.000 Folks, it's for them to stand.

01:14:16.000 The diabetes kid is like, my foot hurts!

01:14:23.000 The constitutional right affirmed by Roe v. Wade, standing precedent for half a century, is under attack as never before. 0.92

01:14:28.000 Damn straight it is.

01:14:29.000 If you want to go forward, not backwards, you must protect access to healthcare. 0.93

01:14:33.000 Preserve a woman's right to choose. 0.99

01:14:34.000 What does Roe v. Wade have to do with healthcare or the right to choose?

01:14:37.000 It's about some arbitrary interpretation of the right to privacy.

01:14:40.000 Ruth Bader Ginsburg said that, and that's why she didn't support it. 0.98

01:14:43.000 Dummy. 0.98

01:14:44.000 I thought you were going to say that's why she died. 0.99

01:14:46.000 LGBTQ plus Americans, let's finally get the Bipartisan Equality Act to my desk.

01:14:53.000 Yes, yes. 1.00

01:14:53.000 Right now in this economy, the most important thing is that a man and a mustache and moo-moo can take a shit at a target. 1.00

01:15:00.000 I said last year, especially to our younger transgender Americans, I'll always have your back as your president, so you can be yourself and reach your God-given potential. 0.98

01:15:10.000 It's not God-given, it's surgeon-given.

01:15:13.000 You took away what God gave you, and you put a strap on there.

01:15:19.000 They sent it back.

01:15:20.000 Yeah, you signed for us.

01:15:23.000 He didn't answer the door.

01:15:26.000 We do agree on a lot more things than we acknowledge.

01:15:29.000 Nope.

01:15:29.000 No.

01:15:29.000 We don't.

01:15:30.000 I signed 80 bipartisan bills into law last year.

01:15:33.000 Didn't read a one.

01:15:35.000 From preventing government shutdowns, protecting Asian-Americans from... Asian? 0.76

01:15:39.000 Still too common hate crime.

01:15:40.000 Did you say Asian?

01:15:42.000 I thought you said Asian-Americans.

01:15:44.000 I heard a mix of Asian and Haitian, I think.

01:15:47.000 We heard Asian-Americans and you're thinking Asian-Americans.

01:15:51.000 The bill he wrote three decades ago, they'll take out the n-word that he used several times.

01:15:57.000 Right.

01:15:57.000 Use whiteout.

01:15:58.000 Which is in fact the name of the bill.

01:16:00.000 Tonight I'm offering a unity agenda for the nation.

01:16:03.000 Okay, let's see this.

01:16:04.000 Four big things we can do together in my view.

01:16:07.000 First, beat the opioid epidemic.

01:16:11.000 You'll have to talk to your son.

01:16:14.000 He's hoarding them.

01:16:15.000 Start with your own family, Joe.

01:16:16.000 And now pharmaceuticals are bad, yeah.

01:16:18.000 are bad. And now pharmaceuticals are bad. Back to being bad.

01:16:20.000 Yeah.

01:16:20.000 Reduction in recovery. Get rid of outdated rules and stop doctors and stop doctors from

01:16:26.000 prescribing drugs. Prescribe them to the people that need it and prescribe them the amount

01:16:30.000 they actually need. Stop the flow of illicit drugs by working with state and local law

01:16:33.000 enforcement to go after the traffickers. Stop letting illegal immigrants in. Good luck. 1.00

01:16:36.000 And if you're suffering from addiction, you know you're not alone. With the pills that

01:16:37.000 are filled with fentanyl that aren't even the drugs that they're supposed to be.

01:16:41.000 It worked like a charm for your brother.

01:16:43.000 23 million.

01:16:44.000 It worked like a charm for your brother.

01:16:45.000 It worked like a charm for his son, sorry.

01:16:46.000 Yeah.

01:16:47.000 Unreal.

01:16:48.000 Let's take on mental health, especially among our children. 0.67

01:16:53.000 Especially among our vice presidents. 0.99

01:16:55.000 Especially among our children who we masked and scared the shit out of for two years.

01:16:59.000 And threat nuclear war. 0.95

01:17:00.000 I'd threaten nuclear war. 0.58

01:17:01.000 That'll work.

01:17:02.000 I urge every parent to make sure your school, your school does just that.

01:17:08.000 Have the money.

01:17:10.000 We can all play a part.

01:17:12.000 Sign up to be a tutor or mentor.

01:17:13.000 You shut down the schools and we had a record number of teen suicides in the history of the United States, by the way, and depression and generalized anxiety disorders.

01:17:22.000 So, okay, all right, let's continue.

01:17:24.000 Haugen, who is here tonight with us, has shown We must hold social media platforms accountable for the national experiment they're conducting on our children for profit.

01:17:35.000 Oh, don't you love this?

01:17:35.000 This is someone who worked at Facebook and now what, she's working with the government?

01:17:38.000 Oh, okay.

01:17:39.000 Yeah, she was a whistleblower.

01:17:41.000 But not the way you'd think.

01:17:45.000 We're not doing enough to silence voices they don't like.

01:17:50.000 That's literally the point.

01:17:53.000 Ban targeted advertising to children.

01:17:56.000 Demand tech companies stop collecting personal data on our children.

01:18:01.000 And let's get all Americans the mental health services they need. 0.61

01:18:06.000 More people.

01:18:07.000 Start with you and some levodopa.

01:18:09.000 And full parity between physical and mental health care if we treat it that way in our insurance.

01:18:20.000 Look, folks.

01:18:21.000 You notice he says that every time there's a clap?

01:18:23.000 There's a cue.

01:18:23.000 It's either look or folks.

01:18:26.000 Support our veterans.

01:18:30.000 What, did Pelosi just fall forward?

01:18:33.000 Did she have to post?

01:18:34.000 Did she have to post?

01:18:35.000 Can we drink a little?

01:18:37.000 Yeah.

01:18:38.000 That was an exciting clap.

01:18:39.000 Too much rum in the rum raisin.

01:18:41.000 By the way, also, no raisin.

01:18:43.000 I'll take rum balls, minus the balls.

01:18:44.000 No ice cream. 0.96

01:18:44.000 I'll take rumbles minus the balls. 0.96

01:18:51.000 And then Pete Buttigieg said, save them for me. 0.97

01:18:54.000 I'll take a mimosa just in case anyone wants juice.

01:18:58.000 Yeah they did.

01:18:59.000 stationed at bases breathing in toxic smoke from burn pits.

01:19:03.000 Why is he clapping for that? 1.00

01:19:05.000 What the fuck? 1.00

01:19:07.000 What is this? 1.00

01:19:07.000 Did you see that shit? 1.00

01:19:09.000 Nancy Pelosi goes, burn pits! 1.00

01:19:11.000 They have black lung? 0.76

01:19:12.000 Because they have black lung?

01:19:14.000 The waste of war, medical, drunk, and hazardous materials, jet fuel, and so much more.

01:19:20.000 Did she what?

01:19:22.000 Play ball! 1.00

01:19:23.000 Yeah, like she did it like she was a fly on shit. 1.00

01:19:25.000 She's the lady from Christmas Vacation right now. 1.00

01:19:31.000 She wraps up her cat.

01:19:36.000 It's fine.

01:19:37.000 Just go in the other room.

01:19:39.000 How much you want to bet she brought a jello mold to this? 0.99

01:19:42.000 What did he just say?

01:19:48.000 I don't know for sure if the burn pit that he lived near, that his hooch was near, in Iraq and earlier than that in Kosovo.

01:19:56.000 Did he just say that his hooch was near? 0.97

01:19:59.000 I still don't know what that means.

01:20:01.000 But I am committed to find out everything we can.

01:20:06.000 Committed to military families like Danielle Robinson from Ohio, the widow of Sergeant First Class Heath Robinson.

01:20:14.000 He was born a soldier, Army National Guard, combat medic in Kosovo and Iraq, stationed near Baghdad just yards from burn pits the size of football fields.

01:20:27.000 Danielle is here with us tonight.

01:20:30.000 They love going to Ohio State football games.

01:20:33.000 Look, obviously your heart goes out to any veteran who was killed.

01:20:36.000 God bless your husband for serving.

01:20:37.000 God bless your husband for serving, but the fact that he's now talking about burn pits and Ohio State football games tells you how paper thin.

01:20:44.000 He spent less than, maybe we can bring it, 20 seconds on the Supreme Court nominee, and he spent less than two minutes on the actual economy.

01:20:53.000 Well, speaking from someone whose family is still waiting on that check, good luck.

01:21:00.000 I'm kidding.

01:21:01.000 And I mean that wholeheartedly to that family and the person who served.

01:21:06.000 Yeah, you should pay her.

01:21:07.000 Yeah, you should pay her.

01:21:08.000 She found purpose to demand that we do better.

01:21:12.000 Tonight, Danielle, we are going to do better.

01:21:14.000 The VA is firing new ways of linking toxic disclosure disease, already helping more veterans

01:21:25.000 And tonight, I'm announcing we're expanding eligibility to veterans suffering from nine respiratory cancers.

01:21:32.000 I'm also calling on Congress to pass a law to make sure veterans devastated by toxic exposure in Iraq and Afghanistan finally get the benefits of the comprehensive health care.

01:21:41.000 How about Vietnam, Joe?

01:21:43.000 Yeah.

01:21:43.000 Maybe you want to go back to that one?

01:21:44.000 Because there's still people waiting.

01:21:46.000 A lot of people.

01:21:47.000 Yeah.

01:21:49.000 I'd be for that.

01:21:50.000 Sign that bill tomorrow, baby.

01:21:51.000 Yeah, there's one.

01:21:52.000 You should know, you're in politics then.

01:21:54.000 Yes!

01:21:56.000 He could have done something about it then and now.

01:21:58.000 Right.

01:22:00.000 Let's end cancer as we know it.

01:22:02.000 Oh, wait, this is... Let's end cancer as we know it.

01:22:07.000 Look, they just looked down!

01:22:09.000 It's here.

01:22:09.000 It says clap.

01:22:12.000 Is cancer bad?

01:22:14.000 I think so.

01:22:15.000 Is it in Ukraine?

01:22:16.000 Sorry, I wasn't as excited as I was to stand up for the burn panel.

01:22:21.000 Cancer just doesn't get me as enthused.

01:22:22.000 So many of you have lost someone you love.

01:22:27.000 Husband, wife, son, daughter, mom, dad.

01:22:29.000 Didn't have eaten the pea soup.

01:22:31.000 Cancer is the number two cause of death in America, second only to heart disease.

01:22:35.000 Last month, I announced the plan to supercharge the cancer moonshot that President Obama asked me to lead six years ago.

01:22:42.000 Our goal is to cut cancer death rates by at least 50% over the next 25 years.

01:22:47.000 I think we can do better than that.

01:22:50.000 Turn cancers from death sentences into treatable diseases.

01:22:55.000 More support for patients and their families.

01:22:59.000 Who's going to do that?

01:23:00.000 Pharmaceutical companies?

01:23:01.000 I just want to make sure I called ARPA-H.

01:23:04.000 Advanced Advanced Research Projects Agency for Health.

01:23:12.000 Pattern after DARPA in the Defense Department.

01:23:14.000 Here's the thing, this sounds good.

01:23:16.000 Do you really believe the government's going- They couldn't figure out that COVID came from the COVID-named lab.

01:23:22.000 Jon Stewart had to tell them.

01:23:24.000 Well, that second one has certainly been a rush order for you.

01:23:26.000 We have a singular purpose to drive breakthroughs in cancer, Alzheimer's and diabetes.

01:23:32.000 Well, that second one has certainly been a rush order for you.

01:23:36.000 We can do these things.

01:23:38.000 It's within our power.

01:23:40.000 And I don't see a partisan edge to any one of those four things.

01:23:43.000 Really?

01:23:44.000 My fellow Americans, tonight...

01:23:47.000 How much you want to bet he walked into that office and was like, I want to care for Alzheimer's!

01:23:50.000 Rather than a sacred space, a citadel of democracy, in this Capitol, generation after generation

01:23:59.000 Americans have debated great questions, made great strife, and have done great things.

01:24:04.000 Did he say make great strife?

01:24:07.000 He meant to say make great strife.

01:24:09.000 He said strife.

01:24:11.000 In fairness, that was a Freudian slip.

01:24:12.000 Right.

01:24:13.000 We built the strongest, freest, and most prosperous nation the world has ever known.

01:24:18.000 And you're trying to tear it down.

01:24:18.000 Did he just say we broke the most prosperous nation?

01:24:21.000 Built.

01:24:21.000 Our moment of responsibility.

01:24:24.000 Our test of resolve and conscience.

01:24:27.000 Of history itself.

01:24:30.000 It is in this moment that our character of this generation is formed.

01:24:35.000 Our purpose is found.

01:24:37.000 Our future is forged.

01:24:40.000 Well, I know this nation.

01:24:43.000 I have no neck.

01:24:44.000 Save democracy?

01:24:45.000 You said it was the freest and fairest election ever!

01:24:47.000 and opportunity and we will save democracy. As hard as those times have been, I'm more

01:24:53.000 optimistic about America today than I've been my whole life.

01:24:56.000 Because I see the future that's within our grasp. Because I know there's simply nothing

01:25:02.000 beyond our capacity. We're the only nation on earth that has overturned every crisis we've

01:25:08.000 faced. Beyond our mask is our bright light.

01:25:11.000 The only nation that can be defined by a single word.

01:25:14.000 Possibilities.

01:25:16.000 So on this night, on our 245th year as a nation, I've come to report on the state of the nation.

01:25:23.000 The state of the union.

01:25:24.000 And my report is this.

01:25:27.000 The state of the union is strong because you, the American people, are strong.

01:25:33.000 And I am not.

01:25:35.000 Exactly.

01:25:35.000 Our government's not doing us any favors.

01:25:37.000 Thank God you are strong.

01:25:39.000 Yes.

01:25:39.000 Thank God you're strong, because I'm very feeble, and my heart is run by wires and bent-back paperclips.

01:25:46.000 I have pool hues on each side of my shoes, duct tape to keep my knees in.

01:25:51.000 And we will, as one people, one America, the United States of America, God bless you all, and may God protect our troops.

01:26:02.000 Thank you.

01:26:04.000 Go get him.

01:26:05.000 Huh?

01:26:06.000 Go get him?

01:26:06.000 He said go get him.

01:26:09.000 By the way, he didn't say God bless America.

01:26:10.000 He said God bless you and God protect our troops.

01:26:14.000 The liver spots back there.

01:26:15.000 I really want to hear what Tapper says.

01:26:17.000 Okay, let's hear what Tapper says. 0.99

01:26:18.000 It should be suck. 0.95

01:26:20.000 It's a very strong beginning. 0.98

01:26:22.000 Several bipartisan moments of standing ovations.

01:26:26.000 No.

01:26:26.000 Seven times he forgot who he was.

01:26:27.000 people of Ukraine against the invasion of Russia.

01:26:31.000 Lots of applause for holding Putin and Russian oligarchs accountable, followed by a call

01:26:36.000 for his domestic agenda, including traditional Biden calls for infrastructure, changes to

01:26:42.000 the tax code, a made in America agenda.

01:26:45.000 There was the traditional laundry list.

01:26:48.000 Right, so hold on really quickly.

01:26:49.000 Before we go to CNN's commentary, actually, again, the promo code is BIDENFACTCHECK.

01:26:54.000 It's available tonight for the next 24 hours.

01:26:55.000 You get $20 off at Mug Club, where we'll be doing another 45 minutes of show tonight.

01:27:00.000 $45 off.

01:27:01.000 You go to lotto.com.

01:27:03.000 And we also have footage, actually.

01:27:06.000 So some of you are wondering, how did he prepare for this debate?

01:27:08.000 And we actually got exclusive footage.

01:27:11.000 just to his debate prep actually and this is two beers in and um turns out he he brought in

01:27:17.000 not the big he brought in the second big guy so here vice president dad are you okay

01:27:33.000 He didn't even smoke any, Hunter.

01:27:36.000 Maybe it's a contact high.

01:27:37.000 I mean, Finna Gangster, this is some grade A genre.

01:27:41.000 Maybe his dementia medicine's wearing off.

01:27:43.000 What do you think, Posacky Jawea? 0.87

01:27:46.000 Circle back. 0.98

01:27:49.000 He's gotta do the State of the Union in a little bit and he's full retard. 1.00

01:27:56.000 Have you tried hitting him? 0.96

01:28:05.000 Nah, we're not supposed to hit him anymore.

01:28:07.000 One more good bump on the noggin and it's hello President Kamala and goodbye America.

01:28:11.000 Didn't you already sell our secrets to the Chinese? 1.00

01:28:18.000 Dude, shut up. 1.00

01:28:19.000 Not in front of my dad. 0.99

01:28:21.000 Sacky doesn't even know about that.

01:28:24.000 Circle back.

01:28:26.000 Circle back.

01:28:26.000 Give him his pills then.

01:28:33.000 Oh damn, those are my dad's pills? 0.99

01:28:36.000 That's why I got the Hershey sports. 1.00

01:28:38.000 I thought it was an STI from my dead brother's wife.

01:28:41.000 Ha ha ha.

01:28:42.000 Oh.

01:28:46.000 Don't circle back, Hummer.

01:28:48.000 Don't.

01:28:48.000 I saw you looking down her shirt while she lay over both casket weeping.

01:29:08.000 Nice work, Jackrabbit.

01:29:10.000 I knew you'd wake the former vice president up.

01:29:14.000 And now the cheese is all ours.

01:29:16.000 Well, it doesn't seem like the most...

01:29:29.000 It doesn't seem like the most prudent debate prep.

01:29:32.000 Whatever works.

01:29:33.000 Right.

01:29:33.000 We'll be taking your chats and also giving a full wrap-up, of course, on Mug Club.

01:29:37.000 But we'll be doing a wrap-up here, then taking your chats.

01:29:39.000 Lateralscreditor.com slash Mug Club.

01:29:40.000 Before we do that, go to CNN really quickly.

01:29:41.000 We've got some dates coming up for you guys.

01:29:42.000 That's right.

01:29:43.000 Dave and I will be on tour.

01:29:45.000 Lots of these shows are already sold out, so you've really got to jump on these.

01:29:47.000 May 14, Tulsa Ballroom in Tulsa, Oklahoma.

01:29:50.000 June 18th, Pikes Peak Center in Colorado Springs.

01:29:53.000 Oh, okay, in Colorado Springs.

01:29:54.000 Okay, great, yeah.

01:29:55.000 Go to the website, ladderwithcrowder.com slash tour. 1.00

01:29:58.000 Alright, right now, let's go see how CNN is kissing his ass. 0.98

01:30:01.000 As we all know, he thinks about unity, but tonight he made it functional. 0.99

01:30:04.000 As we all know.

01:30:05.000 This idea of a unity agenda.

01:30:06.000 These are not wildly controversial ideas.

01:30:09.000 Combating opioids.

01:30:10.000 Getting rid of the Second Amendment. 0.55

01:30:13.000 These are the kinds of things that are going to be very hard for people to argue against.

01:30:17.000 I think that's the phase they're trying to get into now.

01:30:20.000 Yeah, unless you sit them across from you. 0.98

01:30:22.000 Actually, unless you've spent the last two, I'm sorry, five years destroying unity in this country, it's easy to argue that you don't give a shit, pardon me, about unity. 0.98

01:30:33.000 I know, I'm pissed. 0.98

01:30:34.000 My heaven. 1.00

01:30:35.000 That guy is so gay. 1.00

01:30:36.000 Breyer is... Look at that. 1.00

01:30:37.000 Right now he's like... Oh, stop.

01:30:41.000 Stop.

01:30:43.000 Stop.

01:30:44.000 Next to Anderson Cooper, Justice Breyer looks gayer.

01:30:47.000 Even Anderson Cooper's like, this is making me uncomfortable.

01:30:49.000 This is excessive.

01:30:53.000 And what he said, I think, showed resolution, showed determination.

01:30:58.000 I do wonder, Anderson, whether there should have been more on foreign policy, more on Ukraine.

01:31:05.000 Maybe.

01:31:05.000 Not so much for the allies, for whom he has been supporting and reassuring.

01:31:10.000 Did you hear when I said I was gonna stop cancer?

01:31:13.000 Yeah, I'm not.

01:31:16.000 Why do they have the black guy from the Allstate commercials lying in there? 0.56

01:31:19.000 Let me smell you and see.

01:31:20.000 A hunter just drove into nine people.

01:31:22.000 Swalwell's, like, nosing in.

01:31:23.000 for a little bit. Let me smell you and see a hunter just drove into nine people. This

01:31:28.000 is Walwell's like nosing in. Can you sign my badge? Yeah. Prices that have to be Eric

01:31:34.000 Swalwell was banging a Chinese spy.

01:31:37.000 This man is still walking amongst you.

01:31:40.000 He's still representing you. 0.54

01:31:43.000 He was banging a Chinese spy.

01:31:46.000 Just to be clear, there's no Snopes, there's no PolitiFact that even says kinda true.

01:31:52.000 It's 100% true and he is within a hair's distance of the former Vice President of the United States.

01:31:59.000 For crying out loud, I don't even know if he last wiped himself on the curtains since his most recent session.

01:32:07.000 With a Chinese spy! 0.97

01:32:10.000 It's fine now, he's dating a new Russian girl, I hear she's very nice.

01:32:13.000 Loves him for him.

01:32:14.000 That's only because the Ukrainian girls were just, there was a shortage. 1.00

01:32:16.000 What have you cared about freedom?

01:32:17.000 Let's be clear about this.

01:32:17.000 Ukrainian girls were just, there was a shortage.

01:32:21.000 Freedom versus tyranny as democracy versus autocracy which is something that President

01:32:26.000 Zelensky...

01:32:27.000 When have you cared about freedom?

01:32:28.000 Let's be clear about this.

01:32:29.000 He's talking about a Supreme Court nominee, right, Brown Jackson, who signed an amicus

01:32:35.000 brief in 2001 that banned people from discussing pro-life options in front of Planned Parenthood.

01:32:43.000 I can't think of a more blatant violation of the First Amendment!

01:32:48.000 Well, Steven, she's... Who's that man?

01:32:51.000 I don't know.

01:32:52.000 Looks like he's wearing Hulk Hogan's outfit from Tropic Down... Was it Tropic Down Under?

01:32:58.000 Thunder Down Under?

01:32:59.000 Oh, Thunder... In Paradise.

01:33:01.000 Thunder in Paradise.

01:33:02.000 That's so sick!

01:33:04.000 Is that only two of us know this?

01:33:06.000 How in the world?

01:33:07.000 Is that what we're talking about?

01:33:08.000 Dave's like, I don't remember other things but that.

01:33:10.000 No, I don't remember most of my childhood.

01:33:14.000 Well, the beatings, Dave.

01:33:16.000 Yeah, I do remember the beatings.

01:33:17.000 Wait, you heard powerful?

01:33:18.000 Yeah, you heard powerful?

01:33:20.000 Really?

01:33:21.000 Putin's like, aha!

01:33:21.000 Wait, you heard powerful?

01:33:23.000 Yeah, you heard powerful?

01:33:25.000 Really?

01:33:26.000 Putin's like, ah ha ha ha!

01:33:28.000 Look at that guy!

01:33:29.000 Putin is going to have a sore hand from smacking his 190-yard table. 0.99

01:33:34.000 Do you have any idea as to the throbbing vascularity of Putin's erection right now? 0.99

01:33:44.000 Oh, it's massive. 0.99

01:33:45.000 He's not deterred.

01:33:46.000 Where are you outside?

01:33:47.000 I don't believe you're outside.

01:33:48.000 There's no breath.

01:33:49.000 Oh, really?

01:33:49.000 Oh, tilting it.

01:33:50.000 I love it.

01:33:51.000 You can't lift it.

01:33:52.000 Yeah, right.

01:33:53.000 Unless one can get inside the head of Vladimir Putin and events on the ground will determine

01:33:55.000 it.

01:33:56.000 But this could be a very long and boring out conversation.

01:33:57.000 He's not deterred.

01:33:58.000 How about, where are you outside?

01:33:59.000 I don't believe you're outside.

01:34:00.000 There's no breath.

01:34:01.000 That's right.

01:34:02.000 When Dr. Fauci was asked about the timeline for ending various measures, he said, you

01:34:07.000 don't make the timeline.

01:34:08.000 The virus makes the timeline.

01:34:10.000 This walks into two dead beagles.

01:34:11.000 Well, it's not quite comparable, but we don't make the timeline here.

01:34:13.000 It's a very complicated international crisis.

01:34:18.000 I'm trying to do my sandfly experiments.

01:34:21.000 Bring in the beagles. 0.71

01:34:24.000 Yes, I'm Dr. Fauci by day, but by night, I am Mr. Sandfly!

01:34:31.000 Oh, Mr. Sandfly.

01:34:32.000 How does that cure COVID?

01:34:33.000 It doesn't.

01:34:34.000 It doesn't?

01:34:35.000 Bring me a dog.

01:34:36.000 Bring me more beagles! 1.00

01:34:38.000 So opens his mouth, it's like Candyman farewell to the flesh, but sandflies.

01:34:43.000 I said sandflies, not bees!

01:34:46.000 Michael Clarke Douglas?

01:34:47.000 What?

01:34:48.000 Duncan.

01:34:49.000 Hey, Edmont, drink!

01:34:51.000 Gerald is slurring.

01:34:52.000 I didn't slur, I just got the name wrong. 0.98

01:34:54.000 In fairness, it was the least dumb slurring. 0.97

01:34:57.000 Michael Clarke Duncan, 380 pound black guy, Michael Douglas, guy who got HPV going down on Catherine Zeta-Jones. 0.98

01:35:04.000 That's true.

01:35:05.000 The best way.

01:35:05.000 100% true.

01:35:06.000 Before he was married to Catherine Zeta-Jones, he sounded like his dad, Kirk and Spartacus.

01:35:12.000 After, he sounded like Willem Dafoe in Spider-Man.

01:35:14.000 I should have never munched on that, Spider-Man!

01:35:17.000 No, after he's like, I'm much happier now.

01:35:21.000 He just said, worth it.

01:35:23.000 Worth it!

01:35:23.000 Yes.

01:35:24.000 Worth it!

01:35:25.000 ...required any sacrifices on the part of Americans.

01:35:30.000 What he did say is that, I want you to know that we're going to be okay.

01:35:34.000 Oh, well that's nice.

01:35:36.000 How are we going to be okay with weak foreign policy?

01:35:39.000 Because he's going... He doesn't... They're going to take more of your money.

01:35:42.000 Well that doesn't make me... Stupid son of a bitch! 1.00

01:35:45.000 He doesn't get it! 1.00

01:35:46.000 Guys, he doesn't get it!

01:35:47.000 Admonish him!

01:35:48.000 I was going to make it better!

01:35:49.000 He's going to take more of your money!

01:35:50.000 It's not... He's going to print more money, leave weapons in places we shouldn't.

01:35:57.000 Come on! 0.61

01:35:58.000 What, did you skip Keynesian economics or Kenyan-Asian?

01:36:01.000 I don't care.

01:36:01.000 Kenyan-Asian?

01:36:02.000 This is kind of funny.

01:36:03.000 He left a bunch of weapons in the Middle East and his son left weapons in a trash can instead of elementary school.

01:36:09.000 They're just good at leaving weapons.

01:36:10.000 They just leave them wherever they are.

01:36:12.000 It just makes common sense.

01:36:13.000 His son left a handgun in a dumpster instead of elementary school and then his dad said, hold my schnapps and he left ten Blackhawks in Afghanistan.

01:36:22.000 Hold my lactaid.

01:36:25.000 Can we bring up that tweet you were showing me?

01:36:27.000 You knew it was really distasteful when they used the fighter jets that were left to spell out, Joe Rogan is short in the sky.

01:36:33.000 You're like, come on ISIS. 1.00

01:36:34.000 One of the people that I hate the most on this topic, I'm going to have him bring it up real quick.

01:36:38.000 Robert Reich!

01:36:40.000 You usually shouldn't express any controversial opinions if your name is Reich.

01:36:43.000 He shouldn't, right?

01:36:44.000 Perhaps his entire first term will be remembered for the measured and powerful way he has dealt with Putin's aggression?

01:36:50.000 Whoever imagined this would be a significant part of Biden's legacy?

01:36:53.000 Are you kidding me?

01:36:54.000 By the way, his middle name's Third.

01:36:56.000 Well, I wanted to know if he was the Third or not, just to be safe. 0.96

01:37:00.000 How can you view that speech and go, this is powerful, this is measured, right?

01:37:05.000 No!

01:37:06.000 You have stopped Putin from doing nothing.

01:37:09.000 You've stopped him from doing nothing?

01:37:11.000 And now you are driving him into the arms of China by implementing economic sanctions. 0.93

01:37:15.000 Look, I don't believe... I just don't think that economic sanctions like that work if it is not combined with severe military action.

01:37:23.000 You either need to be all in or all out.

01:37:25.000 It's just like a fight.

01:37:26.000 You have no business fighting.

01:37:28.000 When people talk about getting into bar fights on the street...

01:37:30.000 It's so silly because the amount of damage that can be done, the unintended consequences, maybe you just think you're going to slap somebody around.

01:37:37.000 He's out cold, he hits his head in the concrete.

01:37:39.000 If you ever get into a physical altercation, you either need to completely avoid it and de-escalate, or be as swift and as violent as possible.

01:37:48.000 There should be no in-between.

01:37:50.000 Economic sanctions without swift military action is foolish because, just as we've seen with the drug war, they are going to find an ally somewhere.

01:37:59.000 And like the point you made about Germany and Russia, you go from World War I to Allies again in World War II until Germany decided they were going to say, uh, no, just kidding!

01:38:08.000 I had my fingers crossed!

01:38:11.000 That's what's happening with China and Russia.

01:38:12.000 They're not natural allies, but you're seeing what's happening with the embargo on wheat being removed.

01:38:16.000 You're seeing what's happening with the hundreds of billions of dollars in increases in trade.

01:38:21.000 You're seeing what's happening with China now supporting Russia, or at least condemning the United States diplomatically.

01:38:26.000 Not calling it an invasion.

01:38:27.000 Well, if it was a bar fight, this is kind of like him intervening and threatening to pay Putin's bar tab.

01:38:32.000 Yes.

01:38:34.000 No, what he's doing is he's saying, here are sanctions, they'll take a month to take effect and really hit them.

01:38:39.000 And Ducey asked this question to Jen Psaki.

01:38:42.000 Well, it's good when you're in another country.

01:38:44.000 Do you think that the Ukrainians have a month?

01:38:46.000 Because I think they're dying right now.

01:38:49.000 Maybe if we just stop buying their oil today, it'll make a difference.

01:38:54.000 Supplies have been shut off.

01:38:55.000 The Klitschko's just made welterweight.

01:38:57.000 But when he brought up them burning, what's her face?

01:39:02.000 Oh, yeah, she's like, baby, burn, baby, burn! 1.00

01:39:04.000 No, no, no, it's worse than that.

01:39:06.000 Nancy Pelosi, I don't know if we can bring that back up, but that is a clip when he said, people who have lung damage from breathing in toxic fumes and burn pits.

01:39:14.000 She tripped over the desk, trying to clap, and went, ah! 1.00

01:39:19.000 Like if she were a superhero, she would just be the fly, but this is her only power.

01:39:23.000 Ah!

01:39:24.000 I am, I am the cricket!

01:39:27.000 Ah!

01:39:28.000 Tell me she didn't look like Christmas Vacation Lady. 1.00

01:39:30.000 Tell me she didn't!

01:39:34.000 This is what happens when you have people who fear no accountability.

01:39:37.000 You know why?

01:39:37.000 Look, that was absolutely insane.

01:39:39.000 What do you think would happen if Mike Pence, if during a speech Donald Trump said something like, I don't know, and the China virus, they don't like the Chinese, which he never said, and Mike Pence went... 0.99

01:39:52.000 And started doing like a Justin Bieber heart or some shit. 0.99

01:39:54.000 Guess what? 0.99

01:39:55.000 It would be everywhere.

01:39:56.000 They know!

01:39:57.000 They're not even concerned about anyone on CNN, ABC, NBC, CBS.

01:40:01.000 I'm sure we can flip around to see their reactions saying, this was pretty rough.

01:40:05.000 Yeah.

01:40:05.000 No.

01:40:05.000 That's not healthcare.

01:40:07.000 It's the light from the sewage treatment plant.

01:40:11.000 Clark!

01:40:13.000 Well, I will say, actually, it's not... I think that Cousin Eddie had it perfectly right.

01:40:17.000 This speech, the shitter was full. 0.88

01:40:19.000 Tons of... Hey, got it all out, though. 0.96

01:40:21.000 Don't worry.

01:40:21.000 Toxic smoke.

01:40:22.000 Okay, here we go.

01:40:22.000 Burn pitch.

01:40:27.000 What is she doing?

01:40:28.000 Is she trying to throw her voice? 0.80

01:40:31.000 She heard clapping and she wasn't paying attention so she stood up giddy and smiling for people's death.

01:40:36.000 Not to mention, when he mentioned cancer, she started twerking.

01:40:40.000 Which she really can't do with that app.

01:40:43.000 No she can't.

01:40:43.000 It sounds like one of those noise clackers that you get at Chuck E. Cheese when your kid was like your 90 Tokens.

01:40:50.000 Just clack clack clack clack clack clack clack clack CLACK MY HIT!

01:40:53.000 Tomorrow she's on a commercial with Sally Field.

01:40:56.000 I have osteoporosis.

01:40:58.000 Horrific twerking accident.

01:41:01.000 Right now there's homeless people crabbing on my driveway.

01:41:04.000 I'm watching through my ring doorbell camera.

01:41:06.000 Please, please look at the bottom of this.

01:41:08.000 Tapping oil.

01:41:09.000 Ah, they just moved it.

01:41:09.000 Tapping oil supplies to kind of blunt the price increase.

01:41:12.000 Three days.

01:41:14.000 Yeah.

01:41:14.000 People from around the world have released 60 million barrels of oil.

01:41:18.000 Three days of supply in the United States.

01:41:20.000 Three days of supply in the United States.

01:41:21.000 What are we doing on day four, Joe?

01:41:23.000 Look, here's also something we need to talk about.

01:41:25.000 Look, it's very easy to solve the... Not to solve.

01:41:29.000 But to mitigate the damage being done to the American people.

01:41:31.000 Now what did he say?

01:41:32.000 We're going to force companies to pay $15 an hour.

01:41:34.000 By the way, the same companies that they forced to close.

01:41:37.000 That worked like a charm, didn't it?

01:41:38.000 Just look at the economic results of red states and blue states.

01:41:40.000 For example, compare New York to Texas or Florida.

01:41:43.000 You can debate about the spread of the virus even though it looks like red states did relatively Better than blue states.

01:41:49.000 Though you can say, okay, maybe it's a wash.

01:41:52.000 There can be no debate at all.

01:41:54.000 None.

01:41:55.000 Just to be clear.

01:41:55.000 None.

01:41:55.000 There's no both sides of the issue as far as the economic, the disastrous economic ramifications that happen with shutting down businesses.

01:42:01.000 His remedy now is to, what?

01:42:03.000 Force businesses to pay more.

01:42:05.000 Okay, there are things that we can do right now to solve this issue as it relates to the average American, which he doesn't want to discuss.

01:42:12.000 By the way, use the hashtag BidenFactCheck.

01:42:14.000 That's the promo code $20 off at ladderwithcredit.com slash MugClub.

01:42:17.000 We're doing this stream live tonight, live fact-checking a lot that goes into producing it.

01:42:21.000 We make no money on YouTube.

01:42:22.000 Here's what we can do.

01:42:25.000 Open up our own oil reserves.

01:42:26.000 Now, not only does that help the United States, right, open up not only our own oil reserves, but open up, as opposed to shutting down the Keystone pipeline, open up our own natural gas, oil reserves, and even clean coal technology.

01:42:36.000 Not only does it allow us to help our own citizens as it deals with gas prices, not only does it allow us to be independent, Yeah, like we saw in 2016, under Donald Trump, for the first time in modern American history, allows us to be a net exporter of oil.

01:42:51.000 What does that mean, being a net exporter of oil?

01:42:52.000 It means that we can send out more oil than we bring in.

01:42:55.000 Hey, who would we be sending that to?

01:42:57.000 Could that benefit people in the Ukraine?

01:42:59.000 Could that benefit people in Europe, particularly people who might be dependent on oil supplies, like the Nord Stream Pipeline?

01:43:06.000 Right, this is the Nord Stream 2.

01:43:07.000 I'm assuming there's a 1.

01:43:09.000 I have no idea.

01:43:10.000 Yeah, by the way, I have no idea.

01:43:13.000 Uh, what is it, Russia is responsible for, is it 10%, is it 1%? 0.64

01:43:17.000 10% of the oil, uh, world's oil supply, but they're one of the single biggest producers of oil, uh, for all of Europe.

01:43:23.000 I can find this any second.

01:43:25.000 Uh, you guys can break it up.

01:43:26.000 I don't exactly know what the number is, but the point is...

01:43:28.000 We're now at $100 a barrel for oil per day.

01:43:32.000 Yeah.

01:43:33.000 And they're talking about three-day supply of oil.

01:43:35.000 And we were already at a high gas price anyway.

01:43:38.000 We were already at a high gas price.

01:43:39.000 Oil was going up.

01:43:40.000 This wasn't just a Russia thing.

01:43:42.000 When the United States focuses on its own interests, it can benefit the rest of the world.

01:43:47.000 And you know what?

01:43:48.000 It's a perfect analogy. 0.88

01:43:49.000 People say you need to put on your own oxygen mask before you help the person next to you, right in the plane.

01:43:53.000 That's you as a passenger.

01:43:55.000 Okay.

01:43:56.000 There is no more clear-cut example of the pilot than the United States.

01:44:01.000 So if you're a passenger, you need to put on your own oxygen mask first so you can help the person next to you.

01:44:05.000 The pilot, certainly, should put his own oxygen mask on first.

01:44:08.000 How do you know that we're the pilot?

01:44:10.000 Well, we're the most powerful country in the world, not only the free world.

01:44:13.000 We were paying All of NATO, more than the rest of the countries combined.

01:44:17.000 Four years.

01:44:18.000 How do you know that the United States is the pilot? 0.99

01:44:20.000 Because when shit goes wrong in the Ukraine or across Europe, they look to the United States, the pilot. 0.99

01:44:25.000 So guess what? 0.95

01:44:26.000 Open our own energy reserves here so we can help ourselves and that allows us to help nations overseas.

01:44:31.000 Also, when we're talking about energy, so we open up our own resources.

01:44:34.000 And this is the key.

01:44:36.000 You can't say wars for oil, right, no effects, rock against Bush, and now act like that's not a huge component here with Russia and Ukraine.

01:44:43.000 Of course it has to do with energy.

01:44:45.000 Something else that we need to be doing is looking at the most effective forms of energy.

01:44:49.000 He won't talk about this because the Democratic Party has maligned it for years.

01:44:52.000 Nuclear energy is not only zero, Carbon emissions, just to be clear.

01:44:59.000 Entirely clean, but there have been three accidents, and this is what the media decided to, of course, sexify, glorify.

01:45:04.000 Three Mile Island, right, Chernobyl, and Fukushima.

01:45:08.000 And in those cases, particularly Fukushima, almost all the deaths came from the actual evacuation plan.

01:45:12.000 There is no form of energy.

01:45:14.000 that has a lower amount of deaths per kilowatt hour produced of energy than nuclear energy.

01:45:20.000 And it is something that we can use. It is something that is effectively renewable.

01:45:23.000 It is something that actually creates very little waste.

01:45:26.000 And it is something that is available to us right now with no carbon emissions. To see more clear-cut

01:45:31.000 examples, look at the difference between France and Germany. Look who

01:45:34.000 cut their carbon emissions.

01:45:36.000 France, primarily nuclear energy, versus Germany, who went to renewables, wind and solar. And

01:45:40.000 not only did they increase their carbon emissions, they would have brownouts.

01:45:43.000 They would have to sell energy at a net negative cost.

01:45:45.000 So, no one is saying, we wouldn't like to move to all electric everything, but right now it needs to be powered by something.

01:45:52.000 And right now, we're powered by oil that comes from places overseas, as you have seen, by the way, up until last week, Well, this week, former Vice President Joe Biden supported, signed off on the North Stream Pipeline going through Russia when one of the first actions he had taken as President was shutting down the Keystone Pipeline here in North America.

01:46:15.000 So up until last week, he supported us being dependent on foreign oil.

01:46:18.000 So, if we want to go electric in the future and you believe that it runs on sunshine and farts, except reality now, it requires energy.

01:46:26.000 Well, where does that come from?

01:46:27.000 Do you want it coming from the United States?

01:46:30.000 Or do you want it coming from Russia?

01:46:31.000 Do you want it coming from Saudi Arabia?

01:46:32.000 Then, do you want it coming from zero carbon emission nuclear energy that we can use here in a safe, reliable manner?

01:46:40.000 Or, do you want nothing?

01:46:42.000 Because that's what you'll get with wind and solar when you're dealing with that kind of infrastructure.

01:46:46.000 Just look at Solyndra. 0.98

01:46:47.000 Look at these companies that the government has tried to shove down your throat.

01:46:50.000 There are things we can do right now to make us less dependent on the rest of the world.

01:46:54.000 And tyrants, as former Vice President Joe Biden put it, like Vladimir Putin, right now.

01:47:00.000 But he doesn't want to do that.

01:47:01.000 Up until last week, he supported buying more oil from Putin!

01:47:06.000 Absolutely.

01:47:07.000 And you know how I know that nuclear is totally safe?

01:47:10.000 They put it in things that are getting shot at.

01:47:13.000 The entire point, put it on a sub, put it on a carrier.

01:47:16.000 Those things are targets.

01:47:18.000 If it was so dangerous.

01:47:19.000 Wasn't Chernobyl like one guy's arrogance anyway?

01:47:23.000 It was the Russian system.

01:47:25.000 But it was like, wasn't it just like one guy?

01:47:27.000 Yeah, like horrible oversight to begin with.

01:47:29.000 Terrible oversight.

01:47:30.000 Yeah, which basically started with, you know, measuring contest.

01:47:34.000 The domino effect.

01:47:35.000 Lots of vodka.

01:47:35.000 Yeah.

01:47:37.000 Lots of vodka. 0.99

01:47:38.000 And then people had three testicles. 1.00

01:47:40.000 We don't know why. 0.97

01:47:41.000 Well, I don't know if they necessarily had three testicles. 0.75

01:47:43.000 Some of them were starting off with two and a half. 0.77

01:47:45.000 Actually, the button to shut it down was at the other end of Putin's table, and so it took a while to get there.

01:47:49.000 He's like, oh, why did they have 250-yard table?

01:47:52.000 I can't reach easy button.

01:47:53.000 They were in a meeting, and they were like, the button's at the end.

01:47:56.000 Somebody go get it. 0.76

01:47:57.000 Can you slide button like Heinz Ketchup in Jim Carrey commercials from the 80s?

01:48:03.000 This is actually a fact.

01:48:05.000 Before Chernobyl, they had regular-sized tables.

01:48:07.000 Oh my gosh.

01:48:09.000 He just walked in, he's like, WHAT HAPPENED TO MY PINEWOOD?

01:48:13.000 Right after the meltdown, just... Long tables, really long.

01:48:16.000 Russian response from the governor of Iowa.

01:48:20.000 Republican response. 1.00

01:48:21.000 You just said Russian response, you son of a bitch. 1.00

01:48:23.000 Well, hell, she's wearing red. 1.00

01:48:25.000 it looked like all drink fine i think i saw in the island rego montage hammering

01:48:29.000 families of violent crime wave was crashing our cities

01:48:34.000 and the soviet army was trying to redraw the world map even before taking the oath of office the president told us

01:48:42.000 that he wanted to make america respected around the world again

01:48:47.000 and to unite us here at home as a weekly he's failed on both fronts

01:48:53.000 the disastrous Afghanistan withdrawal.

01:48:56.000 more than cost American lives. It betrayed our allies and emboldened our enemies. North

01:48:56.000 Yeah, I know.

01:49:02.000 Korea is testing missiles again at an alarming rate. The Speaker of the House recently warned

01:49:09.000 our Olympic athletes not to speak out against China. And now Russia has launched an unprovoked, 0.52

01:49:16.000 full-scale military invasion of Ukraine. An attack on democracy, freedom, and freedom

01:49:24.000 I'd be good with that.

01:49:26.000 Now all Americans must stand united in solidarity with the brave people of Ukraine as they courageously fend their country against Putin's tyranny and fight for their freedom.

01:49:32.000 For sure.

01:49:33.000 No, yeah, I mean I would...

01:49:34.000 This is a good crippling backhand. 0.99

01:49:36.000 I would kill every person in this room if that would allow me to see that. 1.00

01:49:40.000 Might let you kill them. 1.00

01:49:41.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:49:42.000 I would. 0.93

01:49:43.000 Because he's a killjoy.

01:49:44.000 But it will bring you back to life.

01:49:45.000 Yeah.

01:49:46.000 It's a profit.

01:49:47.000 Yeah, it'll bring you back to life.

01:49:48.000 I'm not sure that's one of his jobs.

01:49:49.000 Who just goes, boop, fentanyl.

01:49:50.000 Yeah.

01:49:51.000 He might have used it already if it were day.

01:49:54.000 He'll just go, boop, eight ball.

01:49:56.000 He hasn't resurrected yet.

01:49:58.000 Eight ball.

01:49:58.000 It's like the smelling salts of cup foods.

01:50:01.000 Heal thyself, physician.

01:50:03.000 Alright.

01:50:03.000 Let's stay out of this one.

01:50:06.000 By the way, this is one thing when people ask why don't I more regularly support Republicans.

01:50:11.000 It's because it's pretty tough to get behind this.

01:50:13.000 I know.

01:50:13.000 It's a little lackluster.

01:50:15.000 You watched us fact check this in real time, and we'll do more fact checking.

01:50:15.000 Here's the thing.

01:50:18.000 This obviously had to be written beforehand.

01:50:20.000 It's almost like when they do rap battles.

01:50:22.000 I'm like, oh, I have this cipher.

01:50:23.000 You're like, you just rapped about a place where I've never lived and never even been, and my mother's name is not Ethel.

01:50:29.000 They're like, well it was prepared beforehand.

01:50:32.000 This is prepared beforehand and they try to make minor changes.

01:50:34.000 This isn't real.

01:50:35.000 It's why I do Change My Mind.

01:50:37.000 It's why we do things like Man on the Street where it's unedited and you just discuss with people.

01:50:40.000 This isn't real.

01:50:42.000 It's not designed to reach the American people.

01:50:44.000 This speech right now is designed to reach the Republican donors who will say, I really like that Kim Reynolds because he seems to be a good governor plus she has breasts so we really need to put her up on the ticket. 0.91

01:50:55.000 Yeah, she's definitely the wild and out politics. 1.00

01:50:58.000 Yes!

01:50:59.000 Just Nick Cannon winning everything.

01:51:01.000 Listen, you have Joe Biden.

01:51:02.000 You couldn't have put, like, a young, like, well-spoken person in there?

01:51:07.000 Like, to be the juxtaposition?

01:51:09.000 For crying out loud, you could have put Bobby Jindal on.

01:51:09.000 You had to match it?

01:51:11.000 I'd feel like I'm on Molly.

01:51:13.000 Do any of them have their own teeth?

01:51:16.000 Anybody in politics?

01:51:17.000 I'm not entirely sure.

01:51:19.000 Those aren't hers.

01:51:22.000 It's old.

01:51:23.000 I don't know what she's talking about, but I like that sentence.

01:51:27.000 It's all big fixident.

01:51:29.000 Add it again.

01:51:31.000 We need to grow more corn.

01:51:33.000 I was pulling teeth out of my neighbor's faces.

01:51:36.000 Let's get the most mousy-sounding governor. 0.67

01:51:40.000 Speaking of corn, let's go overseas for more of that as well.

01:51:45.000 She decided tonight to go with Handmaid's Tale chic.

01:51:49.000 Handmaid or Handmaidens? 0.99

01:51:50.000 Did anyone know what the Ukrainian flag looked like five days ago?

01:51:54.000 Probably not.

01:51:55.000 I actually knew because I knew a girl in high school who lent me Chrono Trigger for my Super Nintendo and I never gave it back.

01:52:01.000 Sorry, Cecilia.

01:52:02.000 And then he had the Ukrainian frag when we did the cultural fair.

01:52:07.000 Ah.

01:52:07.000 Yeah.

01:52:08.000 At least that didn't end with HPV.

01:52:09.000 No.

01:52:10.000 Not as far as I know.

01:52:14.000 Sorry, Cecilia.

01:52:15.000 It was a great RPG.

01:52:17.000 Chrono Trigger is rare now.

01:52:19.000 It goes for $400 on eBay.

01:52:21.000 Remember her lower back and going, what flag is that? 0.98

01:52:24.000 But I guess you have the last laugh.

01:52:27.000 And I can tell you what's not on that list.

01:52:30.000 Tell us.

01:52:31.000 They won't tell you that spending trillions more and bankrupting their children is the answer to their problems.

01:52:37.000 Do you really have to wear the team colors?

01:52:38.000 They won't tell you that we should be paying people not to work.

01:52:41.000 I thought it was a fashion thing.

01:52:42.000 I thought Red was in.

01:52:43.000 And they certainly won't tell you that we should give billions in tax giveaways to millionaires and billionaires.

01:52:50.000 All right, okay, let's do this.

01:52:51.000 Let's give our wrap-up and then we'll go to take some chat on Mug Club because, you know what, I'd be more interested to hear Ben Shapiro's rebuttal.

01:52:58.000 No, no, we're not on Mug Club right now.

01:52:59.000 Oh, what'd you say?

01:53:00.000 Nothing bad.

01:53:02.000 All right, what do you think there, Gerald?

01:53:03.000 Your wrap-up.

01:53:04.000 It'll be more interesting than Governor Kim Reynolds.

01:53:06.000 Yes, so I think he did all the things we thought he would do, right?

01:53:09.000 He didn't specifically blame Donald Trump for the NATO thing, so I was a little surprised by that.

01:53:14.000 I thought he was going to at least hint at that, like, the former administration policies.

01:53:17.000 That tells me they had a focus group and they realized it was an impossible sell.

01:53:20.000 Exactly, like, they're like, ah, you can't do that.

01:53:22.000 I was a little surprised that he stumbled as much as he did.

01:53:25.000 Like, I thought he would actually be able to string a few more sentences together.

01:53:29.000 We were drinking! 1.00

01:53:29.000 You kept hitting the damn button, Tim! 1.00

01:53:32.000 You're a little bit too on top of that. 0.99

01:53:34.000 And so he stumbled through this, and I'm not surprised at all.

01:53:38.000 This is something that I thought obviously would happen, that the water would be carried by every analyst on CNN, no problem.

01:53:45.000 Of course.

01:53:45.000 He's powerful.

01:53:46.000 He's strong. 1.00

01:53:47.000 Robert Reich, you absolute moron, measured, powerful response that did nothing to keep Putin from invading Ukraine and killing its citizens as you wrote that? 1.00

01:53:58.000 That's powerful to you? 1.00

01:54:00.000 I think powerful means somebody stays out of their neighboring country.

01:54:03.000 You know, Kamala?

01:54:04.000 The small country next to the big country, and the big country invaded the small country?

01:54:08.000 That place?

01:54:09.000 That's power.

01:54:10.000 Right.

01:54:10.000 And he didn't address that.

01:54:11.000 And then he blamed the economy on all kinds of things.

01:54:14.000 But here's what you needed to hear.

01:54:15.000 The government knows best.

01:54:17.000 We're going to take your money and spend it on everybody else.

01:54:21.000 By the way, while completely...

01:54:24.000 Refusing to acknowledge that the government-knows-best policies, which led us here, play to any hand in where we are right now.

01:54:30.000 And it was government-knows-best.

01:54:31.000 You mean government-knows-best like shut down businesses?

01:54:33.000 Government-knows-best like hand out checks indefinitely?

01:54:36.000 Government-knows-best like shut down schools and go to Zoom calls?

01:54:39.000 And by the way, the only reason they ever opened up was because of the gnashing of teeth and wailing from conservative moms who, by the way, Had a huge wins in Virginia and almost in New Jersey. 1.00

01:54:51.000 So the same turnover that happened that you fought, now you're trying to take as a win and saying, by the way, government knows best.

01:54:56.000 Government, absolutely.

01:54:57.000 I don't think there's ever been a more clear-cut example.

01:54:59.000 Created the mess that we're in, and now he's trying to say, but don't worry, government can fix it.

01:55:03.000 Yeah.

01:55:03.000 We'll get you out.

01:55:04.000 Just give us more money.

01:55:05.000 Give us more power.

01:55:06.000 Do what we ask, and we will get you out of this mess that we put you in.

01:55:08.000 They don't ask.

01:55:09.000 Well, that's true.

01:55:10.000 Come on.

01:55:11.000 Ask.

01:55:11.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:55:12.000 It's a suggestion.

01:55:13.000 Right, yeah.

01:55:14.000 And rape is just, you know, it's just a suggestion. 0.97

01:55:17.000 I wouldn't even say suggestion.

01:55:19.000 I mean, it's forward.

01:55:21.000 Yes.

01:55:21.000 It just makes common sense.

01:55:24.000 I'd say bold.

01:55:25.000 Assertive.

01:55:26.000 Dominant.

01:55:26.000 How do you trust a guy like that, though?

01:55:28.000 He's proven that he can- A rapist? 0.93

01:55:30.000 In one year, the president- I mean, it's close. 0.99

01:55:33.000 He smells people and touches them in weird ways.

01:55:35.000 By people, you mean children.

01:55:38.000 How do you trust a guy that in one year has done nothing good?

01:55:43.000 In one year he has shown you every single measure.

01:55:46.000 Nobody trusts this guy and he's like, just give me more power.

01:55:48.000 Give me more money.

01:55:50.000 That's all I need.

01:55:50.000 Yeah.

01:55:51.000 I'll fix it this year.

01:55:52.000 Right.

01:55:52.000 We're going to cut a trillion dollars out of the debt.

01:55:54.000 Really?

01:55:54.000 Yeah.

01:55:55.000 How are you going to do that?

01:55:56.000 You know what our budget is?

01:55:57.000 But we're going to end all the burn pits.

01:55:58.000 And they're supposed to be like, yes!

01:56:00.000 Yes, burn pits! 0.96

01:56:01.000 Yes! 0.99

01:56:01.000 Burn, baby, burn! 0.99

01:56:02.000 Burn pits! 0.99

01:56:03.000 This is a good time to release my song.

01:56:05.000 It's a burn pit!

01:56:06.000 From burn pit.

01:56:07.000 Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, it's a burn pit.

01:56:10.000 Yes, burn! 1.00

01:56:11.000 Talking about my little burn pit.

01:56:13.000 I just don't know where this came from.

01:56:15.000 Did she go to clap and she was like, I don't have fingers that move right now.

01:56:19.000 I think she just wanted to feel.

01:56:20.000 She just got so confused, yeah.

01:56:23.000 She was high as hell.

01:56:24.000 She was really drunk.

01:56:25.000 I think she was literally drunk.

01:56:26.000 She was biting on her lips.

01:56:27.000 Or on benzos, yeah.

01:56:29.000 She tractor-beamed one too many puddling souls. 1.00

01:56:32.000 Just chewing on her Coke mouth.

01:56:36.000 Just right behind her there's a Jim Henson puddling muppet who just looks all dehydrated.

01:56:42.000 How much Adderall can I mix with vodka?

01:56:46.000 That diabetes boy looks nice and tasty.

01:56:49.000 That threatened.

01:56:51.000 He promised to cure cancer.

01:56:53.000 Well, no, he said... Yeah, I don't think much more needs to be said than that.

01:56:56.000 I mean, it's really... It was lie after lie, and then he promised to cure cancer.

01:57:01.000 That's where I stand on it.

01:57:02.000 You can't say that's a lie.

01:57:03.000 That's just a bold statement.

01:57:04.000 Hold on, Dave.

01:57:04.000 One of your favorite things...

01:57:06.000 He said the VA was going to be efficient and make payments.

01:57:11.000 And take care of that woman's husband and families the same way they did with the Vietnam veterans who across the country have died and left their families with absolutely nothing.

01:57:21.000 I know exactly what that feels like.

01:57:22.000 Yeah, he's gonna be right on top of it just like he has been since the war in Vietnam, since Desert Storm, since we've been in Afghanistan.

01:57:32.000 How many countries did he flub?

01:57:34.000 Tonight alone?

01:57:35.000 I think Iran was one of them.

01:57:37.000 What was the Iran thing?

01:57:37.000 Well one he made up, he didn't say Ukrainians, he said Iranians.

01:57:41.000 I think he said Uranians.

01:57:44.000 Uraniums!

01:57:45.000 What? 0.99

01:57:48.000 It was just statement after statement of just lies and nonsense.

01:57:54.000 More division.

01:57:55.000 And I'll be honest, I'm surprised he didn't stumble as much.

01:57:59.000 Really?

01:57:59.000 Yeah.

01:58:00.000 You expected more?

01:58:01.000 I thought more.

01:58:01.000 Wow.

01:58:02.000 So they really gave him a good amount of B12.

01:58:05.000 Can I, and real stuff, maybe the cure?

01:58:08.000 You're saying you don't think he'll cure cancer?

01:58:11.000 Oh no, I obviously think he will.

01:58:13.000 Can we take a poll?

01:58:14.000 Can we put a poll up on Twitter?

01:58:15.000 How many of you, you know, considering how brave and powerful they're claiming this speech to be, how many of you out there believe that former Vice President Joe Biden will end cancer as we know it?

01:58:29.000 By the way, you know what you do when you're confident on something?

01:58:31.000 Claim to end cancer?

01:58:34.000 By the end of this decade, we will put a man on the moon and return him safely to Earth.

01:58:38.000 That's what you say.

01:58:40.000 You don't say, we need to get rid of cancer and be tougher, we're gonna do a better job.

01:58:45.000 He didn't say, here's a deadline, go do it.

01:58:48.000 He didn't marshal the resources of the United States and give us a goal and say, let's go achieve it.

01:58:52.000 Well, it's like a bad psychic, right?

01:58:53.000 It's like a bad palm reading.

01:58:55.000 If at any point in human history, cancer is cured.

01:58:58.000 It was Joe Biden.

01:58:59.000 Yeah.

01:59:01.000 Oh yeah.

01:59:02.000 Oh my gosh.

01:59:03.000 We knew it.

01:59:04.000 What?

01:59:04.000 We had an Oracle amongst us.

01:59:06.000 40 years ago.

01:59:07.000 We had no idea.

01:59:08.000 It was a long game.

01:59:09.000 We need to consult the Biden lineage.

01:59:12.000 He just rays up like Dune.

01:59:15.000 I just like that he yelled at the end of the speech like Bill Pullman in Independence Day.

01:59:19.000 Yeah, he's like, HA!

01:59:20.000 Let's go!

01:59:21.000 Or attempted to, I should say.

01:59:23.000 Yeah, he sounded more like Bill Pullman in Casper.

01:59:25.000 Yeah, he sounded... Ouch.

01:59:32.000 I'll tell you what.

01:59:34.000 No, I appreciate that, too, because I was very clear.

01:59:35.000 You always say, folks, listen.

01:59:37.000 Yeah.

01:59:37.000 Hey, come on.

01:59:38.000 Cancer cure's coming.

01:59:40.000 Yeah, cancer cure.

01:59:41.000 You can't cure COVID.

01:59:45.000 I'm sorry.

01:59:48.000 And the only tool you have against COVID is one that developed under Donald Trump, and you said you wouldn't take.

01:59:54.000 I killed more people with COVID than Donald Trump. 0.78

01:59:57.000 I'm better. 1.00

01:59:58.000 Now I'm going to cure a dude with cancer.

02:00:00.000 Oh, please don't. 0.82

02:00:02.000 Go get him! 0.99

02:00:03.000 Woo! 0.99

02:00:04.000 Go get him! 0.99

02:00:05.000 Killer T-cells!

02:00:07.000 Yeah.

02:00:08.000 He's like the coach in varsity football.

02:00:09.000 They start giving you chemo in advance.

02:00:13.000 He's jogging out of the huddle, okay, or the locker room.

02:00:15.000 Let's go, go! 1.00

02:00:16.000 But nobody's following him.

02:00:17.000 We call it our new advanced chemo plan.

02:00:19.000 Everyone next speech comes in looking like Justice Breyer.

02:00:22.000 Yeah.

02:00:23.000 It's great because when you get it, you won't lose as much hair.

02:00:25.000 Hold on, hold on, Justice Breyer.

02:00:26.000 Do I have any left?

02:00:27.000 Yeah, Justice Breyer.

02:00:28.000 Oh my, what?

02:00:30.000 I didn't even, ah! 0.99

02:00:31.000 It's like Chris Kattan in a gay sketch. 0.98

02:00:33.000 Was that Mango? 0.98

02:00:34.000 Was that Mango? 0.91

02:00:35.000 Was that Justice Mango? 0.53

02:00:36.000 He was laying it on pretty thick.

02:00:39.000 Oh yeah.

02:00:40.000 He likes it laid on thick.

02:00:43.000 I mean, look, come on.

02:00:46.000 I couldn't help it.

02:00:48.000 I do respect his commitment.

02:00:50.000 Is he out of the closet?

02:00:52.000 Is Breyer openly gay?

02:00:55.000 Or is he like a stelter who's still claiming he's straight? 0.81

02:00:58.000 Under that robe, not a thing.

02:01:00.000 Not a thing.

02:01:00.000 He just turned around and he just mooned Pelosi.

02:01:02.000 Boop! 0.95

02:01:03.000 Look at this!

02:01:04.000 Oh my gosh!

02:01:06.000 They love me!

02:01:07.000 They really love me.

02:01:08.000 He's talking about Pete Buttigieg. 0.93

02:01:09.000 He p****d me. 0.99

02:01:10.000 He really p****d me. 0.95

02:01:12.000 Or Jeffrey Tambor in Transamerica. 0.94

02:01:15.000 Whatever that is.

02:01:16.000 Transparent.

02:01:19.000 I will say this, and we're going to go take your chat here on Mug Club and hear what you guys think.

02:01:22.000 And again, the promo code is BIDENFACTCHECK.

02:01:25.000 You get $20 off Mug Club.

02:01:31.000 It's about what I expected.

02:01:32.000 I was shocked that he spent little to no time on the Supreme Court nominee.

02:01:37.000 He went right past it.

02:01:38.000 He spent very little time.

02:01:40.000 On the economy.

02:01:43.000 If that.

02:01:43.000 And he also, it was very clear, especially when you hear, when you compare it to the rhetoric that we have heard from Psaki and from former Vice President Joe Biden about Putin and Donald Trump emboldening Russia.

02:01:56.000 Of course if they meant it they would say it right now when all eyes and by all eyes I mean however many Americans decided to accidentally stumble across this channel um or any channel right now because they broadcast it on every single channel like the Indian head in the 1950s and that would have been more entertaining if Biden just sort of we just tuned in and Elizabeth Warren was going So I will say it was very interesting.

02:02:18.000 You know, you've heard me say this.

02:02:19.000 It's like you see this a lot where people make claims and then they're in a deposition or they're under oath, right?

02:02:24.000 They're under the penalty of perjury and they don't make those same claims.

02:02:28.000 Right now when there were more severe consequences, Biden realized, I'm not going to be able to sell the American public on this idea that Donald Trump emboldened and created a problem with Putin.

02:02:40.000 I'm not going to be able to sell the American people on the idea that Donald Trump weakened our position with China.

02:02:45.000 So that's a very stark contrast.

02:02:47.000 I also think the reason why Is not only because it's a tough sell to the American people, but they know what they're in for with midterms and the red wave.

02:02:56.000 Big time.

02:02:56.000 And so that's why he tried to play up the whole bipartisan, look how many bipartisan bills I've passed.

02:03:00.000 He's trying to sort of ingratiate himself with Republicans because he knows that Democrats, they're in for a massacre and he's hoping to at least lessen the portions of that massacre that are seen to be on his hands.

02:03:12.000 So I did see a stark, to me it was surprising to see that stark of a contrast From everything he's been saying when he's dictating the questions, when he's out there and these are press conferences that nobody really watches, right?

02:03:23.000 And then the media clips and gives highlights, but when he knows this is sort of like our show, right?

02:03:27.000 We do this live.

02:03:28.000 This is done without a net.

02:03:29.000 They don't do that a whole lot on YouTube, especially now with the community guidelines and the advertiser-friendly guidelines and, sorry, the borderline content, what's known as the Crowder Rule.

02:03:37.000 Apologize for that.

02:03:38.000 We do this live, and so what we say is of consequence, and we try to make sure that we say what we mean, and that it's accurate, and that's why we make all references available at lightearthcracker.com.

02:03:48.000 By the way, best thing you can do if you're watching this, uh, is smash the like button if you're watching live, and if you're watching the archive, just leave a comment with your thoughts.

02:03:56.000 And here's why it's important, too, for you to leave comments.

02:04:00.000 And I don't, this is the biggest conservative channel that's ever existed on YouTube, okay?

02:04:04.000 Bar none.

02:04:05.000 And I'm incredibly grateful that you guys have come in.

02:04:07.000 So this is the place, you will have more people right now, more of you will comment below this video giving feedback with your actual thoughts on this address than on any other mainstream website comment section.

02:04:21.000 It's something that we are able to generate that is undeniable where people can read your organic, it's the same reason they got rid of the dislike button.

02:04:29.000 Yeah.

02:04:29.000 Although we can see behind the scenes with our tools, and by the way, still not going well for the White House.

02:04:33.000 But I really would love to see what you guys thought about this.

02:04:36.000 To me it was shocking, just because I thought I guess it's not that shocking.

02:04:42.000 When someone is under the limelight, let's think about it at a press conference.

02:04:47.000 I don't know what the average ratings would be for a press conference when Psaki's there.

02:04:50.000 You're talking maybe in the hundreds of thousands, right, if you're lucky.

02:04:53.000 Maybe a couple million.

02:04:54.000 I don't know how many millions of people are watching tonight, but he's going, OK, the stakes are high. 0.98

02:04:58.000 I can't just use the same old tired, shitty arguments. 0.95

02:05:00.000 Well, the world was watching, hoping for a strong response to Putin. 0.98

02:05:04.000 They didn't get it.

02:05:05.000 Yeah, I mean, there's so much on the table right now, I would assume there had to be a large viewership.

02:05:09.000 I would assume it has to be a Russian oligarch's table.

02:05:12.000 Well, it's a large table to have, it's in Gulag! 0.99

02:05:15.000 You see the table, it's like, this looks like the Ghost of Christmas Presents.

02:05:19.000 Come in and know me better, man!

02:05:22.000 Alright, let's go and take your chats here on Mug Club, and of course thank you if you're watching on Rumble.

02:05:27.000 The more of you who can switch from YouTube to Rumble, the free show is always available on Rumble.

02:05:31.000 We'll be back on Thursday, 10 a.m.

02:05:33.000 10 a.m.

02:05:34.000 Eastern.

02:05:35.000 Right now we're gonna go and take your chats, your feedback, and Let Dave Landau say whatever it is that he wants to say.

02:05:41.000 Of course, on the mug.

02:05:44.000 Mmm, whatcha say?

Louder with Crowder - March 02, 2022

LIVE FACT-CHECK! Biden’s First State of the Union | Louder with Crowder

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Transcript