Louder with Crowder - July 31, 2026


Spain's Invasion Today, America's Invasion Tomorrow?


Episode Stats


Length

20 minutes

Words per minute

127.82

Word count

2,567

Sentence count

324


Transcript

Transcripts from "Louder with Crowder" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
00:04:19.000 I am Crowder, Prince of Utubia, defender of the secrets of Castle Mug Club.
00:04:25.000 Fabulous secret powers were revealed to me the day I held my hand etched mug and said, By the power of Mug Club!
00:04:42.000 And I became Steven, the most powerful conservative on YouTube.
00:04:51.000 Together we defend Castle Mug Club from the evil forces of censorship.
00:04:59.000 Steven.
00:05:01.000 Click Rumble Premium and join now for $99 annually or $9.99 a month to get the entirely ad free experience and an ever expanding roster of content, creators, and free speech.
00:05:15.000 Subject for today.
00:05:31.000 Glad to be with you.
00:05:32.000 It's Friday, so if you're watching, if you're seeing like the first 30 seconds, I don't know how long.
00:05:35.000 It's a love letter to a mug club.
00:05:37.000 We do it every Friday.
00:05:38.000 We haven't missed in a very long time, but you guys don't get to see it unless you're a member of Rumble Premium, which YouTube mug club.
00:05:43.000 Quick question of the day If you could keep one group of immigrants in America, who would they be?
00:05:47.000 Don't say blacks!
00:05:49.000 No.
00:05:49.000 You said keep in.
00:05:51.000 Yeah.
00:05:52.000 What?
00:05:53.000 You make it worse.
00:05:54.000 What are you saying, Gerald?
00:05:56.000 I was just saying nothing, and then it seemed like he was trying to actually push an agenda, which was distinctly anti black.
00:06:03.000 Not really subliminal.
00:06:04.000 No, I don't know.
00:06:05.000 I wasn't subliminal at all.
00:06:06.000 It's like he'd be the guy who would try and slip a frame, you know, in a film reel for propaganda, only he'd slip in like a minute and people were like, this is just a snuff film.
00:06:15.000 What am I watching?
00:06:16.000 This isn't subliminal.
00:06:19.000 By the way, New Zealand, I don't know if you saw this, they had a meltdown over English being an official language.
00:06:24.000 And it's going to happen, so that's cool, but some people don't like it.
00:06:28.000 They want Maori, Maori, Maori, a language that.
00:06:32.000 Say it right.
00:06:33.000 Say it right.
00:06:33.000 Say Maori, huh?
00:06:34.000 Say you're right, huh?
00:06:35.000 Maybe you'll say it right downtown.
00:06:37.000 Hey, get the pity wiggin.
00:06:39.000 Get the pity wiggin.
00:06:41.000 Get the pity wagon.
00:06:42.000 We'll throw them in the clank.
00:06:43.000 We're a serious country, serious people.
00:06:47.000 You're not.
00:06:48.000 I can't take that accent seriously at all.
00:06:50.000 Nobody can.
00:06:51.000 Hey, last guy who said something bad about New Zealand lost his tongue.
00:06:57.000 We have a saying in New Zealand show respect for us Kiwis, you get to keep your teeth.
00:07:01.000 All right.
00:07:02.000 You can screw more sheep.
00:07:03.000 Don't make me hock a sheep.
00:07:05.000 That.
00:07:05.000 That is not true.
00:07:06.000 It is no longer true.
00:07:08.000 We're just doing silly accents.
00:07:09.000 He's creating whole stereotypes about bestiality.
00:07:12.000 No, I'm not.
00:07:13.000 Yeah.
00:07:14.000 I can see anything now.
00:07:15.000 Yeah.
00:07:16.000 Ah, you're breaking new ground there, Copernicus.
00:07:20.000 Galileo, go tell us about the planets.
00:07:23.000 I'm sorry.
00:07:24.000 He doesn't understand that that's been a stereotype for a long time.
00:07:26.000 That's what Australians think of New Zealand.
00:07:27.000 What was that, Aristotle?
00:07:32.000 It's like Aristotle, but you suck.
00:07:34.000 Gay Plato?
00:07:35.000 Gay Play-Doh?
00:07:37.000 You've had a gay play?
00:07:40.000 Yeah.
00:07:40.000 You've had a gay Play-Doh?
00:07:41.000 Yeah, he's gay Play-Doh.
00:07:43.000 He's like Play-Doh, but he's gay.
00:07:45.000 That's what I deal with.
00:07:46.000 All the time.
00:07:47.000 He likes to soccer-tease men all day.
00:07:48.000 That's all I've got to say, yeah.
00:07:50.000 Huh?
00:07:51.000 Maybe we should use your suck and tease method.
00:07:53.000 Your succrinic method, huh?
00:07:55.000 It's just suck and tease the bulls.
00:07:58.000 It's not soccer-tease, it's suck and tease.
00:08:00.000 Suck and tease.
00:08:02.000 All day.
00:08:03.000 All day, this one with the suck and tease.
00:08:07.000 All right, bring up the rundown.
00:08:09.000 Then we're going to be talking about Spain, the illegal immigrant crisis.
00:08:12.000 And when I say crisis, you know what?
00:08:14.000 Most of them shouldn't care because they're being welcomed with open arms.
00:08:18.000 This is what happens, Europe.
00:08:18.000 You deserve everything that you get.
00:08:20.000 Let's just move on with the show, considering it's been four minutes.
00:08:24.000 This Captain Morgan, CEO, how are you?
00:08:25.000 Fantastic.
00:08:26.000 How are you?
00:08:27.000 He's fantastic because he had a good suck and tease this morning.
00:08:29.000 No, it's the accent.
00:08:30.000 It's the accent.
00:08:31.000 I started his morning right.
00:08:32.000 How do I insult people?
00:08:34.000 You can't take it personally.
00:08:35.000 It's just a silly accent.
00:08:36.000 He's a bright and early.
00:08:38.000 That's right.
00:08:39.000 Sucking and teasing.
00:08:39.000 That's right.
00:08:42.000 Marcus Aurelius.
00:08:44.000 Do the hard things first.
00:08:46.000 Yeah, that's right.
00:08:48.000 In your case, do the soft things first.
00:08:49.000 Oh.
00:08:51.000 I mean, do them hard.
00:08:53.000 He does philosophy.
00:08:54.000 That's right.
00:08:56.000 He feels the asses.
00:08:57.000 I didn't say asses there.
00:08:59.000 Arses, aces.
00:09:01.000 Feeling the aces.
00:09:01.000 Feeling the ace.
00:09:03.000 He's an ace, man.
00:09:05.000 All
00:09:08.000 the time.
00:09:11.000 He was the ace Roman Emperor.
00:09:14.000 Like last, but it is.
00:09:15.000 Gay.
00:09:16.000 Gay Play-Doh.
00:09:24.000 Gay Play-Doh.
00:09:25.000 The thing is, it's a legitimately good insult, but only in that voice.
00:09:29.000 Yeah, it doesn't.
00:09:31.000 I'm not from gay Play Doh over here.
00:09:34.000 It doesn't work.
00:09:35.000 Hey, gay Play Doh.
00:09:37.000 It doesn't work.
00:09:38.000 But if you were at a bar, like, talking and everyone's going, and every time he talks, like, all right, gay Play Doh, it would devastate me.
00:09:45.000 I would lose it.
00:09:45.000 That's my new best friend.
00:09:47.000 Look at him drinking his drink.
00:09:51.000 Another Jagerbomb for gay Play Doh.
00:09:54.000 What are you going to have?
00:09:56.000 He's six on the beach.
00:09:58.000 Gay Play Doh.
00:09:59.000 Gay Play Doh.
00:09:59.000 Hey.
00:09:59.000 You want to have one of those blowjob shots?
00:10:04.000 You have to remove a rib because I don't think anyone here's pining for gay Play Doh.
00:10:12.000 I'm sorry, all
00:10:16.000 right.
00:10:16.000 Right, that's today.
00:10:17.000 Oh, I found one.
00:10:18.000 Yeah, tonight.
00:10:19.000 Phil Melly in Tyrrell Tickets.
00:10:22.000 Tyrrell.
00:10:22.000 Josh Firestone right there.
00:10:24.000 Yeah.
00:10:24.000 You probably expect some more gay Play Doh.
00:10:27.000 Gay Play Doh bits.
00:10:28.000 That's his closer.
00:10:30.000 That's what I'm saying.
00:10:31.000 Where is it?
00:10:33.000 It's at Film Alley in Terrell.
00:10:36.000 Terrell.
00:10:37.000 The card had August 1st on it, so I wanted to make sure Josh's.
00:10:40.000 Oh, it did.
00:10:40.000 Oh, it didn't get screwed up by the KLA.
00:10:43.000 All your hosts is Guy Plato.
00:10:44.000 Sort of back, KLA.
00:10:45.000 Well, accidental plug two shows.
00:10:47.000 I'll be in Weatherford, Texas tomorrow.
00:10:50.000 That's also a film alley.
00:10:51.000 It's a chain of bowling alley movie theaters.
00:10:54.000 Oh, very cool.
00:10:55.000 That's what I do.
00:10:56.000 I play bowling alleys.
00:10:59.000 Guy Plato.
00:11:00.000 That's what a comedy I am.
00:11:01.000 Guy Plato just hangs in at him.
00:11:03.000 Hi.
00:11:04.000 You guys want to go to the.
00:11:05.000 At Bowling Alley, people say, You don't want to do Guy Play Doh stuff, do you?
00:11:09.000 All right.
00:11:11.000 So, here's, well, this is why we got off on that bizarre foot.
00:11:16.000 Here is the Green MP, Tamitha Paul in New Zealand, complaining about English being made the official language.
00:11:27.000 English is a bastard language.
00:11:30.000 This is what you're fighting to protect.
00:11:32.000 There's a language that's not even its own.
00:11:34.000 Right.
00:11:34.000 It's a bastard language.
00:11:35.000 Why is she dressed like Matilda?
00:11:37.000 Old Norse, Latin, it's a complete bastardization, and this is what we're wasting the house's time fighting for.
00:11:44.000 Sorry, I know no one wants to say it straight up, but these snowflakes over here, bunch of snowflakes, they hear the word Aotearoa and cry themselves out.
00:11:53.000 It's empty, but they're not even there.
00:11:55.000 What they do, they cry when they hear the word Aotearoa.
00:11:58.000 They stand up on point of order in this house.
00:12:01.000 That's how weak they are.
00:12:04.000 They see Te Reo Mori and they shiver in their boots.
00:12:07.000 Oh my gosh.
00:12:09.000 Ah, she's trying the old reverse psychology, calling us now flights.
00:12:11.000 They've got their beautiful indigenous language, Kamrai, everywhere before English.
00:12:17.000 And guess what?
00:12:18.000 The world didn't fall over and the world didn't end.
00:12:20.000 People still knew where they were going.
00:12:22.000 In fact, people saw it and thought, wow, we're in a country that values their indigenous language and identity.
00:12:29.000 Unlike our snowflake government that cannot handle Te Reo Mori.
00:12:34.000 All right, so just before, by the way, quick fun fact New Zealand had no human beings there whatsoever until.
00:12:40.000 Polynesian voyagers is how you'll see it described.
00:12:42.000 That means colonizers until they arrived in the 1200s.
00:12:45.000 So they didn't have any language whatsoever.
00:12:47.000 And then they had different dialects because I don't know if you know this, it wasn't all just one big peaceful tribe.
00:12:50.000 There was all kinds of battles.
00:12:52.000 So if you want to take this to its end game, they just want to take it to the point of the marginalized group that they can most, they can use most effectively, exploit right now.
00:13:01.000 The truth is, you guys destroyed the, the Polynesians are the ones who destroyed the ecosystem, right?
00:13:06.000 There was nothing.
00:13:06.000 It was a perfectly peaceful place with no humans whatsoever.
00:13:10.000 So why do you need to go back?
00:13:11.000 Also, tell us about Polynesians and their violent practices and How they treated the infirm, et cetera.
00:13:16.000 I know, again, it's tough because they're not all monoliths.
00:13:18.000 But here's the funny thing when they say, you know, snouts like, you see the left try and do this a lot, like, you're so frail or masculine, Fred.
00:13:25.000 If they go, masculine fragility, just test it, right?
00:13:28.000 They're trying to say that you're the one who's offended.
00:13:29.000 Just say, hey, bitch, Scott, before I slap you.
00:13:34.000 And just as a bit, well, you can't say that.
00:13:35.000 I thought we were doing the same kind of joking.
00:13:37.000 Snowflake, say something slightly racist.
00:13:40.000 Say something slightly homophobic and watch them lose their mind and go, all right, no, come on.
00:13:44.000 You said snow?
00:13:45.000 I thought we were doing the snow.
00:13:46.000 I thought we were just joking around.
00:13:48.000 They can't handle anything.
00:13:49.000 They just use it, but there's no teeth behind.
00:13:51.000 These snowflakes in the empty chairs, it'd just be great if someone just showed up and, like, you're a dumb bitch.
00:13:58.000 You can't say that.
00:13:59.000 Well, I thought I'm the snowflake here.
00:14:03.000 I'm the snowflake, you.
00:14:05.000 You daft cunt.
00:14:07.000 I love that band.
00:14:09.000 That clip looks like Around Gay Play Doh, Around Gay Play Doh.
00:14:16.000 You know, the lady up there is just like, please don't do that, the whole hawka thing, okay?
00:14:20.000 Just don't break out of the hawk.
00:14:22.000 Please, no, please, God.
00:14:23.000 I don't want to hear it again.
00:14:24.000 The people who don't want to see it aren't even there.
00:14:25.000 They're like, this lady's going to speak again.
00:14:28.000 Yeah, she's going to be there.
00:14:29.000 We're going to bounce out of here.
00:14:32.000 Get off of Island.
00:14:32.000 That's right, yeah.
00:14:33.000 She's going to call me a snowflake.
00:14:35.000 It's not very brave to call them weak and snowflakes when they're not even there.
00:14:40.000 Yeah.
00:14:40.000 Well, you know, I mean, she's a strong woman, so she doesn't need anyone there to hear.
00:14:45.000 If a bitch yells in a forest with no one there to hear, is she still a damn bitch?
00:14:51.000 Talk about fit in the stereotype, just women talking behind your back.
00:14:54.000 Yeah, exactly.
00:14:55.000 She's dressed like the clown from the big red couch.
00:14:58.000 Yeah.
00:14:59.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:15:01.000 Yes, they do.
00:15:02.000 The big comfy couch, right?
00:15:03.000 Big comfy couch.
00:15:04.000 That's what it's called.
00:15:05.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:15:05.000 Big comfy couch, yeah.
00:15:06.000 When she used to do her stretches.
00:15:09.000 You watched that a lot, didn't you?
00:15:11.000 By the way, she was like 30.
00:15:13.000 Seems like.
00:15:14.000 Just to be clear.
00:15:15.000 It's appropriate.
00:15:16.000 I don't know what we're talking about.
00:15:17.000 She would sit on.
00:15:17.000 You don't remember?
00:15:18.000 She would lay down on the clock and she'd be like, I'm going to do my stretches.
00:15:21.000 And she'd be like, up to 12.
00:15:24.000 And she'd go around.
00:15:25.000 It looks like Brunette Gallagher.
00:15:26.000 Yeah, exactly right.
00:15:28.000 Yeah, there's the stretches.
00:15:30.000 My point is, I learned good mobility drills from the big, comfy couch as a young man.
00:15:35.000 That's terrible.
00:15:38.000 Anyway, English is the official language of New Zealand right now, or it's one of them, joining the Maori language and sign language, also Elvish.
00:15:50.000 Yeah.
00:15:54.000 So, Maori is an official language.
00:15:56.000 Is it?
00:15:57.000 That's what you just said.
00:15:58.000 It is.
00:15:58.000 Yeah, I know.
00:15:59.000 You said that.
00:16:00.000 I don't know if it's a real language.
00:16:01.000 It's an official language, but it's not real.
00:16:02.000 So, what's the problem?
00:16:04.000 I don't remember.
00:16:05.000 What's the problem about English joining the.
00:16:07.000 Why do we have to have English?
00:16:08.000 Why can't we just have Maori?
00:16:10.000 Maori?
00:16:11.000 Maori?
00:16:11.000 I can't help but understand you in the English you're speaking right now.
00:16:15.000 Why aren't you just speaking to us in English?
00:16:17.000 That's enough out of you, gay Play Doh.
00:16:19.000 Oh, geez.
00:16:19.000 Here we go.
00:16:19.000 All I hear is snowflake, snowflake, gay Play Doh.
00:16:22.000 Uh huh.
00:16:23.000 I got more ties in my hair than you.
00:16:28.000 That means I'm better.
00:16:31.000 What is it?
00:16:32.000 It's just the excess.
00:16:33.000 I don't know.
00:16:34.000 She looks unstable and she is unstable.
00:16:36.000 It's just absolutely silly.
00:16:37.000 But this idea.
00:16:38.000 But seriously, if they ever just say.
00:16:40.000 Snowflake, or they try to go, What are you triggered?
00:16:42.000 They'll do that a lot.
00:16:43.000 Just say something.
00:16:44.000 You don't have to, you know, you don't have to go like drop the N bomb, hard R.
00:16:47.000 Just say something mildly racist but funny or mildly sexist but funny.
00:16:51.000 You know what?
00:16:52.000 Like a woman, just call them, this is a good one, just call them cupcake.
00:16:57.000 Just call them cupcake, sweetheart, pumpkin.
00:16:59.000 So, like, What are you triggered?
00:17:00.000 You're like, No, no, I'm come on, cupcake.
00:17:02.000 We're two adults here.
00:17:03.000 Like, don't call me cupcake.
00:17:04.000 All right, look, I'm sorry, sweetheart.
00:17:06.000 The point is neither.
00:17:08.000 And they just go absolutely nuts.
00:17:09.000 It's just great.
00:17:10.000 It's a lot of fun.
00:17:11.000 I hate sweetheart.
00:17:11.000 They do hate sweethearts.
00:17:12.000 I don't like doing it.
00:17:13.000 I don't call people sweethearts.
00:17:14.000 But for a spite, I might.
00:17:17.000 Yeah, I guess.
00:17:18.000 I mean, they hate it, dude.
00:17:19.000 They really hate it.
00:17:20.000 I don't know why they hate it.
00:17:21.000 It's not because it infantilizes them, I guess, or I don't know.
00:17:26.000 Sexist or something.
00:17:27.000 You do you, pumpkin.
00:17:27.000 All right.
00:17:29.000 That's my cat's name.
00:17:30.000 Pookie.
00:17:32.000 Let's get to Spain.
00:17:35.000 Illegal immigrants.
00:17:37.000 Spain, Espana.
00:17:38.000 Moroccans, Jews.
00:17:44.000 That's a tease.
00:17:44.000 You have to address it.
00:17:46.000 So, yeah, there's a lot of misinformation out there, to be clear, where people were even mislabeling exactly what was going on, where these immigrants were landing.
00:17:54.000 So, let's just first set this up and see if there's a comparison.
00:17:59.000 There is, because when people say, hey, both sides are the same, I want you to remember three years ago the United States border and what it looked like.
00:18:26.000 That's the worst.
00:18:36.000 This is Spain Today.
00:18:54.000 And so that begs the question, as we always ask what would the left do?
00:18:59.000 What would the Democrat Party of the United States do, not with the checks and balances, but completely unfettered?
00:19:04.000 Well, do we have their own words?
00:19:06.000 Do we have their own policies?
00:19:07.000 That brings us to doctors and engineers.
00:19:10.000 We don't need your doctors.
00:19:12.000 We don't need your engineers.
00:19:22.000 We don't need your doctors.
00:19:24.000 We don't need your engineers.
00:19:28.000 All right, so first let me.
00:19:29.000 I just love the way he enunciates everything.
00:19:34.000 Check the references, look at the description.
00:19:35.000 Some misinformation out there.
00:19:36.000 Ceuta is where you've seen a lot of these videos.
00:19:38.000 That's a Spanish enclave.
00:19:40.000 It's not like a territory, it's owned by Spain, but it's right there at a tip, northern tip of Morocco.
00:19:45.000 Okay, that's where you're seeing all of these new migrants.
00:19:49.000 And it's at least about 60,000 as of the time of this broadcast.
00:19:54.000 They've been pouring in.
00:19:55.000 Here's what you've seen.
00:20:04.000 Thank you.