Louder with Crowder - UNBANNED: Full Oscars Live Stream Released!

00:00:01.000 You're new around here, so I'll go easy on ya.

00:00:03.000 Come on!

00:00:04.000 Come on, dance with us!

00:00:07.000 Come on!

00:00:09.000 Come on, dance with us!

00:00:11.000 Come on!

00:00:12.000 Come on, dance with us!

00:00:14.000 Grow up, grow up, grow up, grow up, grow up.

00:00:28.000 Putty ran away.

00:00:31.000 Things will get better.

00:00:32.000 Orphanage ain't but, game brother.

00:00:36.000 Orphanage ain't but, putty ran away.

00:00:38.000 Father will see how to make a dead mill work.

00:00:40.000 Gotta like mill here.

00:00:42.000 Drink to the, guess they deserved it.

00:00:43.000 Putty ran away.

00:00:46.000 Things will get better.

00:00:47.000 Orphanage ain't but, game brother.

00:00:50.000 Orphanage ain't but, putty ran away.

00:00:52.000 Father will see how to make a dead mill work.

00:00:55.000 Gotta like mill here.

00:00:56.000 Drink to the, guess they deserved it.

00:00:58.000 Do what you think is wonderful.

00:01:12.000 Every stone will cover up the background.

00:01:16.000 Do what you think is wonderful.

00:01:19.000 Every stone will cover up the background.

00:01:24.000 Do what you think is wonderful.

00:01:27.000 Grow up, grow up, grow up.

00:01:42.000 Game brother.

00:01:43.000 Orphanage ain't but, game brother.

00:01:45.000 Things will get better.

00:01:47.000 Can the carolers reach the moon?

00:01:49.000 Can the zombies stay like this?

00:01:52.000 For a while Can the night get to me like this?

00:01:56.000 No matter where I Can the zombies stay like this?

00:02:00.000 Things will get better Can the carolers reach the moon?

00:02:03.000 Can the zombies stay like this?

00:02:07.000 For a while Can the night get to me like this?

00:02:11.000 No matter where I Do I close my eyes?

00:02:15.000 I see It's wonderful

00:02:19.000 I do You know

00:02:23.000 I see It's wonderful

00:02:27.000 Every star Will cover the past and

00:02:31.000 It's wonderful I see

00:02:35.000 You know I do

00:02:39.000 It's wonderful It's wonderful

00:02:43.000 Thanks for watching!

00:02:45.000 Like and subscribe!

00:02:47.000 Thanks for watching!

00:03:01.000 It's my dream.

00:03:02.000 I'm not.

00:03:05.000 the the

00:03:17.000 and the

00:03:30.000 ["Entropy." music starts playing once more.]

00:03:34.000 ["Entropy." music continues.]

00:04:06.000 In my blood, in my gut, in my blood In my gut, in my gut, in my gut, in my gut

00:04:12.000 in my gut, in my gut In my gut, in my gut

00:04:17.000 in my gut, in my Save What's going on in my gut?

00:04:22.000 In my gut, in my gut What's going on in my gut?

00:06:06.000 What's going on in my gut?

00:06:08.000 In my gut, in my gut What's going on in my gut?

00:06:36.000 I want you to get Gotta get down

00:06:44.000 I want you to get down Gotta get, get, get

00:06:48.000 Just a hot dog Just a hot dog

00:06:52.000 Just a hot dog Throw that shit out there

00:06:56.000 Just a hot dog Just a hot dog

00:07:00.000 Throw that shit out there I want you to get

00:07:06.000 Gotta get down Gotta get, get, get

00:07:16.000 I want you to get Gotta get down

00:07:26.000 Gotta get, get, get Just a hot dog

00:07:32.000 Just a hot dog I want you to get

00:07:36.000 Just a hot dog Just a hot dog

00:07:40.000 I want you to get Just a hot dog

00:07:44.000 Just a hot dog Just a hot dog

00:08:04.000 Just a hot dog Just a hot dog

00:08:10.000 Just a hot dog Throw that shit out there

00:08:14.000 Just a hot dog Throw that shit out there

00:08:18.000 Just a hot dog Just a hot dog

00:08:22.000 Throw that shit out there Unicorns I love them

00:08:38.000 Unicorns I love them Unicorns I love them

00:08:42.000 Y'all look at them Uni-unicorns

00:08:46.000 Uni-unicorns And I'm in the middle

00:08:50.000 I'm in the middle Goodbye, boo

00:08:54.000 Unicorns I love them Unicorns I love them

00:08:58.000 Uni-unicorns Uni-unicorns

00:09:04.000 Uni-unicorns Uni-unicorns

00:09:08.000 9500 700

00:09:22.000 이 영상은 장영훈의 채널의 유료광고를 포함하고 있습니다.

00:09:26.000 700 600

00:09:35.000 700 700

00:10:28.000 Oh, that's the sound of You guys know what that sound is?

00:10:33.000 That's the sound of I just had the best view on the house.

00:10:35.000 Did you?

00:10:35.000 Yes.

00:10:36.000 Did you?

00:10:36.000 Are we good?

00:10:37.000 Are we live?

00:10:37.000 We got the sound good?

00:10:40.000 That's the Lotto with Carter Oscars live stream party.

00:10:42.000 Nice!

00:10:43.000 Let's go through who you guys are wearing.

00:10:46.000 First off, Brodigan.

00:10:47.000 I'm wearing the Versace Spider-Man collection.

00:10:49.000 Versace Spider-Man collection.

00:10:51.000 That's not a thing.

00:10:53.000 Yeah, you messed that one up, Quarterblack.

00:10:55.000 I appreciate it, but that's clearly a mistake.

00:10:58.000 We got Incredibles, Lady Gaga, Spaceman back here, and you decided to go quite literal.

00:11:02.000 Yeah, I wanted to be the trophy, but these things don't hide anything, by the way.

00:11:07.000 I'm feeling very vulnerable.

00:11:12.000 In Gerald's defense, there isn't much to hide.

00:11:13.000 This is true.

00:11:14.000 This is true.

00:11:15.000 It's actually not true at all.

00:11:16.000 It's incredibly cruel to say.

00:11:17.000 This is not off to a good start.

00:11:18.000 No, it's off to a very bad start.

00:11:19.000 Let's agree with Truce here.

00:11:20.000 By the way, Freddie, in case you couldn't realize this... AIDS.

00:11:26.000 So everyone out there, by the way, we want to hear you guys interact with this show.

00:11:28.000 Do we have the feed of the Oscars stream?

00:11:30.000 I'm not hearing anything.

00:11:31.000 I'm not hearing Engineer Abby bringing up the feed of the Oscars.

00:11:34.000 So we're going to be watching this all night so that you don't necessarily have to.

00:11:38.000 We have a promo code right now.

00:11:39.000 Crowder Oscars, I believe.

00:11:41.000 Crowder Oscars.

00:11:41.000 You entered in, I think, was it $30 off for 24 hours right now.

00:11:45.000 $20 off.

00:11:48.000 Even if you're not student or veteran.

00:11:49.000 Boom.

00:11:50.000 And even if you have the AIDS.

00:11:52.000 Oh, especially if you have the AIDS.

00:11:54.000 Of course, we also have, by the way, the hashtag.

00:11:55.000 Use the hashtag, Crowder Anti-Oscars Party, like last year.

00:11:58.000 We won a Hopefully Surpassed last year, though I don't expect too many people to tune in because no one cares this year about the Oscars.

00:12:02.000 That's true.

00:12:03.000 The Oscars barely care about the Oscars.

00:12:05.000 Oh, that's right.

00:12:05.000 So we're going to have winners.

00:12:06.000 By the way, winner of the costume contest gets a golden mug.

00:12:08.000 Oh, nice.

00:12:08.000 I don't know if people can see this.

00:12:10.000 Golden mug.

00:12:10.000 That's fantastic.

00:12:11.000 And I hear someone coming in.

00:12:13.000 I think a producer is walking into the door here.

00:12:14.000 That happens.

00:12:15.000 Golden mug.

00:12:15.000 And what else do we have?

00:12:16.000 We have guests.

00:12:17.000 Okay, guests.

00:12:17.000 Do we have the guests ready?

00:12:18.000 We have Clint Howard, Jim Newton, Anne McElhinney, Gavin McInnes, Anthony Comia, Nick Searcy.

00:12:18.000 We got guests.

00:12:22.000 Boom!

00:12:23.000 Nick Sersi was in two Oscar films last year, and we also have a drinking game.

00:12:26.000 Can we bring this up, the drinking game?

00:12:28.000 You have to take a drink anytime.

00:12:30.000 Trump, fear, hate, brave, feminism, human rights, diversity, LGBT or QAAP, racism, equality, the words borders, wall, or the theme of borders, wall, theme of dreamers, nationalism, immigration, or if they ever utter the phrase, by the way, let's all take a sip.

00:12:45.000 We're not drinking hard liquor tonight because we have a job to do.

00:12:48.000 But let's bring that back up there, Quarter Black.

00:12:49.000 If they utter the phrase, the actual phrase, no human is illegal, you have to finish your drink.

00:12:55.000 Really?

00:12:55.000 You have to finish your drink?

00:12:56.000 The whole phrase?

00:12:57.000 So here you go.

00:12:58.000 Question, important question.

00:12:59.000 I just spilled over the shot glasses.

00:13:00.000 That's okay.

00:13:01.000 Apparently we're not using them anyway.

00:13:02.000 Are these the only times we're allowed to drink?

00:13:04.000 Those are not the only times you're allowed to drink, but it should be enough.

00:13:07.000 But I can't hear the Oscars feed here, so if someone could bring this up for me.

00:13:11.000 This mug is perfect, by the way.

00:13:12.000 Commercial break on the Oscars right now.

00:13:13.000 Oh, we're still on commercial break?

00:13:15.000 Alright, what have you seen, by the way, in the Oscars?

00:13:18.000 Let me first show you this, what I got here.

00:13:21.000 I'm just gonna roll this across the floor.

00:13:23.000 That'll work.

00:13:25.000 So I'm unfortunately in the Actors Union.

00:13:27.000 That's right.

00:13:27.000 You guys know that I'm in the actor's union, so I get the screeners.

00:13:30.000 The only one I didn't get was the Green Book.

00:13:33.000 You still get the screeners?

00:13:34.000 You can bring that down there, Abbey.

00:13:35.000 Sorry when it's a commercial, I'll sound engineer Abbey.

00:13:37.000 So I do have Black Klansman.

00:13:38.000 I don't know if you guys can see that.

00:13:39.000 Black Klansman.

00:13:41.000 The favorite.

00:13:41.000 Boom!

00:13:42.000 Not my favorite.

00:13:42.000 Right here I have Can You Ever Forgive Me?

00:13:43.000 I also saw that.

00:13:45.000 Very good performances in that.

00:13:46.000 And I've seen every... What do we have?

00:13:47.000 Black Panther tonight?

00:13:48.000 Yes.

00:13:49.000 Okay, so... The Star is Born, Bohemian Rhapsody.

00:13:52.000 Yes.

00:13:52.000 I really like The Star is Born.

00:13:53.000 I really like Bohemian Rhapsody.

00:13:54.000 Who do you think is the favorite to win tonight, by the way?

00:13:56.000 Let's go around the room first, really quickly.

00:13:57.000 I'm hoping a quiet place.

00:13:59.000 I'm hoping, because I really loved it.

00:14:00.000 It's not nominated.

00:14:00.000 That was last year.

00:14:01.000 That was last year, but still.

00:14:02.000 That was not that last year.

00:14:03.000 It was this year.

00:14:03.000 It was this year?

00:14:04.000 It's not nominated for anything except for sound design.

00:14:06.000 I thought it was nominated.

00:14:07.000 No, it is this year, but it's not nominated.

00:14:08.000 Not for Best Picture.

00:14:08.000 No, sound design, yeah.

00:14:09.000 I'm sorry, were you asking Best Picture?

00:14:10.000 The question is Best Picture.

00:14:11.000 This is a horrible start.

00:14:12.000 This is a terrible start.

00:14:13.000 Did you start programming before we did this show?

00:14:14.000 He did.

00:14:15.000 I had half a beer.

00:14:16.000 Alright, what do you think they brought in?

00:14:18.000 I'm going to go with The Star Is Born, only with the guy who played Freddie Mercury for Best Actor.

00:14:22.000 Okay, and what do you think their quarterback?

00:14:24.000 I'm going to say...

00:14:25.000 Black Panther.

00:14:26.000 You take way too much time on the mic.

00:14:28.000 He's like, I'm gonna say... Is that to keep your corner?

00:14:31.000 People aren't hinging on it that much.

00:14:32.000 No.

00:14:34.000 You don't need to set it up quite like that.

00:14:35.000 I appreciate it, though.

00:14:36.000 The guy's gonna be sweating his balls off here.

00:14:39.000 He is sweating.

00:14:41.000 Tonight, I saw people complaining, by the way, about the Oscars.

00:14:44.000 About how there aren't enough black people, women, represented in the Oscars.

00:14:47.000 And here's the thing.

00:14:49.000 Yeah, it's overwhelmingly male, white in the Academy.

00:14:52.000 Yeah.

00:14:52.000 But they disproportionately, not that it's a bad thing, award people of color, women, LGBTQAIP, insert minority of the day.

00:15:00.000 So aren't you grateful that this isn't the BET Awards, where there's a snowball's chance of hell of a white guy getting anything, or a white woman, or likely gay, by the way.

00:15:08.000 Look, if you can have the BET Awards, we can have the Oscars.

00:15:10.000 Let's just call a truce, and you can put everything in there, and we'll keep everything in the Oscars.

00:15:14.000 As far as the gay person at the BET Awards, I don't think Jussie Smollett's up for anything.

00:15:17.000 I don't think he's up for anything.

00:15:18.000 Speaking of BET, we actually have a correspondent from Oh, that's right.

00:15:22.000 That's right.

00:15:22.000 Sorry, guys.

00:15:23.000 I forgot tonight.

00:15:23.000 We actually do have live.

00:15:24.000 We have them right now.

00:15:25.000 Our live, our Black Panther correspondent live from Wakanda.

00:15:29.000 Are you there, sir?

00:15:31.000 Welcome back, Steven.

00:15:33.000 Yeah.

00:15:33.000 What's going on in Wakanda?

00:15:36.000 What's going on?

00:15:37.000 Yeah, there's not actually that much going on.

00:15:40.000 Okay, alright.

00:15:41.000 We'll check back with him later.

00:15:44.000 Was that South Wakanda?

00:15:46.000 I have no idea.

00:15:46.000 Could have been South.

00:15:47.000 Is Wakanda an apartheid state?

00:15:49.000 All I know is that someone was shaking a plasma spear on a Tesla.

00:15:52.000 So here's the thing.

00:15:53.000 I've watched all these ones.

00:15:54.000 The favorite was very good, by the way.

00:15:55.000 The favorite was very good.

00:15:56.000 Incredibly profane.

00:15:57.000 They tried to insert a lesbian.

00:15:58.000 Oh, is it starting?

00:15:59.000 Oh!

00:16:00.000 It's starting right now?

00:16:01.000 And with Queen!

00:16:02.000 With Queen!

00:16:02.000 Alright, let's bring this up really quick.

00:16:04.000 This is actually a good start.

00:16:05.000 Really like Bohemian Rhapsody.

00:16:06.000 I'll get into the movies afterwards in a second.

00:16:08.000 Is that Tom Cruise as Les Grossman?

00:16:10.000 Or was that Sam Rockwell?

00:16:13.000 Nice.

00:16:15.000 You really have to be impressed that Brian May managed to find a gay or at least sing in the Freddie Mercury theme song.

00:16:19.000 Yes, yes you do!

00:16:21.000 That took some effort.

00:16:22.000 I'm not convinced that he doesn't have AIDS.

00:16:24.000 Oh my gosh.

00:16:25.000 Here's the thing, Queen, if you look at them themselves, they weren't really a band about making huge political statements.

00:16:30.000 A lot of people mistake live aid as being... Oh, we got Hopper Crowder here today.

00:16:35.000 Hopper, come here, sit.

00:16:36.000 Who are you wearing?

00:16:37.000 Thank you for the well wishes.

00:16:38.000 He's doing quite well, by the way, with the current treatment.

00:16:40.000 The funny thing about Queen was even in the 80s when all the other artists were like...

00:16:44.000 Boycotting South Africa?

00:16:45.000 Yeah.

00:16:45.000 They played anyway, because even Freddie, who you'd think would be the most political, is like, no, I'm just here to entertain people.

00:16:50.000 Right.

00:16:50.000 Also, there are white people in South Africa.

00:16:52.000 Yeah.

00:16:52.000 They were his entourage.

00:16:54.000 It's okay.

00:16:55.000 So this is actually probably the least political moment of this evening.

00:16:58.000 Yeah, this is what you're going to get.

00:16:59.000 That's it.

00:17:00.000 I liked a lot of the films if it weren't for the insinuations.

00:17:00.000 Yes.

00:17:03.000 I watched Black Klansman.

00:17:05.000 It's probably Spike Lee's best film.

00:17:05.000 Yeah.

00:17:06.000 Do you think he's going to get it?

00:17:08.000 I think he probably is, because he's a black guy.

00:17:09.000 Well, and he got snubbed, apparently, what, 30-something years ago, so... I think people think that.

00:17:14.000 Well, hold on a second.

00:17:14.000 So, the favorite was The Black Klansman, though they actually tried to tie Donald Trump to David Duke.

00:17:19.000 And while I was watching it, I went on Twitter and I could see David Duke calling Trump, you know, a Jew-lover, controlled by the Jews and the big banks.

00:17:26.000 And they ended it with Charlottesville.

00:17:28.000 Here's the question.

00:17:29.000 It was a period piece.

00:17:31.000 There wasn't a Donald Trump in the 60s.

00:17:31.000 What?

00:17:33.000 I mean, technically, there was a Donald Trump in the 60s.

00:17:35.000 They were all Democrats, though.

00:17:37.000 Yeah, the Democrats were essentially Donald Trump then.

00:17:38.000 Hold on a second.

00:17:39.000 Let's listen to this.

00:17:40.000 I want to see Adam Lambert compared to Freddie Mercury.

00:17:44.000 Who worked better?

00:17:47.000 Definitely Freddie Mercury.

00:17:48.000 It was rhetorical.

00:17:51.000 Yeah, come on.

00:17:52.000 He's pretty good.

00:17:53.000 No, he's good.

00:17:53.000 Not bad.

00:17:54.000 Yeah.

00:17:55.000 Listen, you don't have to not say that he's good just because he's incredibly effeminate.

00:18:01.000 You know who actually does a really good Queen cover?

00:18:03.000 Zac Brown Band covers Bohemian Rhapsody.

00:18:05.000 They actually sing the opera parts.

00:18:07.000 Queen never sung the opera parts a lot.

00:18:09.000 Really?

00:18:10.000 Yeah.

00:18:11.000 I had no idea.

00:18:12.000 Hey, by the way, producer Tim, let Hopper back out.

00:18:15.000 He wants to leave.

00:18:17.000 He made an appearance.

00:18:17.000 He's done.

00:18:19.000 No more time on camera.

00:18:20.000 Let me say this because if you're watching for the musical performances, then obviously you want to go to the actual stream.

00:18:25.000 Here's the deal, there are no hosts tonight.

00:18:26.000 This has been a complete and total disaster.

00:18:28.000 Let's bring this down a little bit there, Abby.

00:18:31.000 I would love these films if not for the insinuations.

00:18:33.000 And you look at this here, you have Black Klansman.

00:18:35.000 What are the other ones?

00:18:36.000 Black Panther.

00:18:36.000 Black Panther's a Marvel film.

00:18:38.000 Just like Wonder Woman, just like Captain America.

00:18:38.000 Right.

00:18:41.000 It's not for me, but they've never been the films for the Academy.

00:18:43.000 And all of a sudden, Black Panther is supposed to be the film for the Academy.

00:18:46.000 Black Klansman is okay.

00:18:48.000 There are no standout performances.

00:18:49.000 The favorite, I think, is nominated.

00:18:51.000 Honestly, it's not the kind of film that would usually nominate, aside from the lesbian thing.

00:18:54.000 And by the way, for people who are watching, since we're dealing with the Academy tonight, this is not for children.

00:18:58.000 The lesbian scene, and we want to be told that we're homophobic in the favorite, if you don't want to watch Emma Stone go down on the queen who has sores, oozing sores all over her leg.

00:19:08.000 It's like, listen, you're not even trying to be erotic anymore like you were with Black Swan or anything.

00:19:12.000 You're just trying to be as disgusting as possible.

00:19:14.000 What do you think?

00:19:14.000 Like, what do you think?

00:19:15.000 Do you not like this?

00:19:16.000 Do you not like this?

00:19:16.000 Is that because you're a Mormon and you're against?

00:19:18.000 Was it Prop 8?

00:19:19.000 Was it Prop 8?

00:19:20.000 Was it gay marriage?

00:19:21.000 The point is the statements that they're making this year.

00:19:23.000 I think you can expect a lot of that tonight.

00:19:25.000 That's what we saw last year.

00:19:27.000 Outside of that, they got it right with a lot of these films.

00:19:29.000 Bohemian Rhapsody, great.

00:19:30.000 A Star is Born, fantastic.

00:19:32.000 The Favorite, good film, but it's pretty clear what they're trying to push as far as an agenda, and I think we're going to see that tonight.

00:19:38.000 So that's where there's this disconnect.

00:19:39.000 By the way, Roma was the only one I couldn't make it through.

00:19:42.000 I've seen all of them except for Green Book.

00:19:44.000 Roma, I fell asleep.

00:19:45.000 And when I'm watching Roma, and we're supposed to believe that this is about the plight of the sort of Mexican worker, not Mexican-American, just Mexican worker.

00:19:51.000 I'm going, hold on a second.

00:19:53.000 She's a maid for a doctor and an astrophysicist.

00:19:58.000 Only 2% of Mexicans at that point in time went to college.

00:20:01.000 So she's working for the top 1-2%.

00:20:03.000 Thank God the United States has a middle class.

00:20:05.000 Sometimes when I watch these films, I don't think that we're absorbing what they think we want to absorb.

00:20:11.000 So that's what I think we can expect tonight, a really strong disconnect.

00:20:14.000 And I'm hoping that, you know, they said that Oscar viewing last year was down 20% from the prior year.

00:20:19.000 And they said, oh, it's got to be because of the time.

00:20:21.000 And I'm like, I don't think it's because of the time.

00:20:22.000 I think the message that you guys are putting out is not resonating with people, and they don't want to see you.

00:20:25.000 We got a commercial break.

00:20:26.000 We can bring it down there, Engineer Abby.

00:20:28.000 You look like you've been trying to say something completely unrelated for a long time.

00:20:31.000 I was just going to say, after hearing what the favorite was about, I suddenly regret telling my sister that all my nieces watch this tonight.

00:20:38.000 I regret it just upon hearing it.

00:20:38.000 Really?

00:20:41.000 I have no idea why you would assume that that was a good idea.

00:20:43.000 Sorry, Mom.

00:20:44.000 Look, I get if you're trying to tone down this, like, hot lesbian kind of myth thing, and you're gonna try to do more reality, but why are the oozing sores?

00:20:50.000 Like, that's taking it a little too far.

00:20:52.000 Well, I mean, it's kind of like... Realism.

00:20:54.000 Realism?

00:20:54.000 No, that's not realism.

00:20:55.000 Realism is, she goes, she opens, and she's like, haha, I'll come back later.

00:20:59.000 They're oozing.

00:21:00.000 But, no, honestly, this is... That's just not the way you do it.

00:21:02.000 Are you sure you don't think I'm a gorgeous little crumpet?

00:21:05.000 Feel that?

00:21:06.000 Feel it!

00:21:07.000 Please, I want to feel your fingers slither up my oozing sores.

00:21:12.000 I want my scabs to be reopened with the sounds of love.

00:21:15.000 Please, tear them open.

00:21:18.000 I want my gash to be right next to a gash.

00:21:21.000 Oh, dear God.

00:21:23.000 I mean, this is what Hollywood thinks is edgy, because I heard that the reason that Borat was originally fired from the Bohemian Rhapsody movie was because he wanted the movie to be about Freddie Mercury's sex life.

00:21:33.000 Yeah, no, they could have easily gone way over the top.

00:21:36.000 His music.

00:21:37.000 About his music.

00:21:37.000 Well, I think they picked the right track with that.

00:21:39.000 They picked something.

00:21:40.000 They didn't try to make it about... Oh, is this the montage?

00:21:42.000 Let me hear this really quick there, Engineer Abby.

00:21:43.000 Let me see what they got.

00:21:44.000 Mary.

00:21:49.000 But they're showing stuff that's not... We all actually stuck to Oscars themes.

00:21:52.000 They didn't.

00:21:53.000 They didn't.

00:21:54.000 They just showed Ozark.

00:21:56.000 That's true.

00:21:58.000 They're trying to pack it.

00:21:59.000 They're trying to pack the content.

00:22:00.000 Please welcome a not-host.

00:22:03.000 There is no way this is... Okay, let's hear what the digs are right here.

00:22:07.000 Guys, keep your drinks ready and we're gonna... Send in your costumes, by the way.

00:22:10.000 We're gonna be going to your Twitter handles on the best costumes that are sent in.

00:22:14.000 Good evening and welcome to the 1,000,000th Academy Awards!

00:22:18.000 We are not your hosts, but we're going to stand here a little too long so that the people who get USA Today tomorrow will think that we hosted.

00:22:27.000 Kind of like 30 Rock.

00:22:30.000 Overstay your welcome.

00:22:32.000 Why is Captain America there?

00:22:33.000 Was he in anything?

00:22:34.000 If you're confused, there is no host tonight, there won't be a popular movie category, and Mexico is not paying for the wall.

00:22:40.000 Mexico involved!

00:22:42.000 We have a ding there for the drink.

00:22:44.000 Everyone drink.

00:22:45.000 Bring it in.

00:22:48.000 That's right.

00:22:48.000 He just said, yeah, they will.

00:22:49.000 And we won't be doing awards during the commercials, but we will be presenting commercials during the awards.

00:22:55.000 Funny.

00:22:56.000 So if all the winners could please say, Hellman's Mayonnaise, we're on the side of food, instead of your speeches, that would be great.

00:23:05.000 Again, we are not your hosts this year, but if we had hosted, it probably would have gone like this.

00:23:11.000 I'm Freddie Mercury.

00:23:12.000 Well, I'm the wife!

00:23:13.000 Buster Scruggs, I hardly know her.

00:23:16.000 Hey, Jack.

00:23:18.000 That was a good one.

00:23:20.000 This is what bothered me about Maya Rudolph.

00:23:22.000 A lot of these people like an adult.

00:23:23.000 Stop the flow?

00:23:24.000 No, no.

00:23:25.000 It all becomes about how their jokes aren't funny.

00:23:28.000 I was like, oh, that was a good one.

00:23:29.000 It's an inside joke.

00:23:30.000 How about you just stay in character and do the joke?

00:23:32.000 By the way, Maya Rudolph has no business being on that stage.

00:23:35.000 She hasn't even been funny accidentally.

00:23:40.000 Sorry, did I miss something funny?

00:23:43.000 She's like the Dan Aykroyd of shit comedians.

00:23:46.000 She hangs out with funny people all the time.

00:23:52.000 I'll make that stop.

00:23:54.000 Is that going to be the humor all night?

00:23:57.000 We can do that.

00:23:57.000 They gave him Black Klansman because he's a black man even though Spike Lee sucks.

00:24:04.000 I'm pretty sure Spike Lee is a real queer now cause I think he acts like a fag.

00:24:10.000 They gave him Black Klansman even though Spike Lee sucks.

00:24:15.000 We support each other. For example, we just had the writing of the Oscars. Without Trevor Noah's 27 writers. For

00:24:24.000 example, I support both of you financially. And I hold your boobs while you jog. And Tina, I dub all your dialogue

00:24:34.000 internationally.

00:24:36.000 Do you think they specifically said... Don't get funny.

00:24:41.000 We need a host here.

00:24:42.000 All right, what about... No men!

00:24:44.000 Not a single man!

00:24:45.000 But what about, like, one man if you're doing three?

00:24:47.000 No men!

00:24:50.000 Not one!

00:24:51.000 Gotta be diverse.

00:24:51.000 What if he's black?

00:24:53.000 By the way, she was good in this.

00:24:53.000 No!

00:24:58.000 Vice was pure propaganda.

00:25:00.000 You know what's funny about Vice?

00:25:01.000 For people who didn't watch Vice, they actually try to say that it changed from global warming to climate change because Frank Luntz in a focus group wanted to trick people.

00:25:10.000 I swear to you.

00:25:10.000 And they show Frank Luntz like, who's not afraid of climate change?

00:25:13.000 Raise your hand.

00:25:14.000 There we go.

00:25:14.000 We'll go with climate change.

00:25:15.000 But hold on a second.

00:25:16.000 Let's assume that were true.

00:25:18.000 You're the ones who use climate change right now as cover because it's gotten significantly colder.

00:25:22.000 Yeah.

00:25:23.000 So it was absolute pure propaganda.

00:25:25.000 They don't even allow, by the way.

00:25:30.000 They don't even allow for the possibility that Dick Cheney might have had motives that could have been pure, that could have been altruistic.

00:25:36.000 It assumes that he took off, as that movie was a pile of crap, by the way.

00:25:39.000 By the way, the woman who's being nominated for Best Actress, she looks at the camera like five times.

00:25:44.000 She what?

00:25:45.000 She walks in, she's like, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

00:25:50.000 No, no!

00:25:51.000 No loco!

00:25:52.000 No loco!

00:25:53.000 Is that her fault, or the director's fault?

00:25:56.000 Who's this?

00:25:57.000 Regina King.

00:25:58.000 If Beale Street could talk.

00:26:00.000 Oh, okay.

00:26:01.000 Or speak.

00:26:02.000 Isn't she from Marvel?

00:26:02.000 You know what?

00:26:03.000 I really am upset at the lack of diversity at these awards for that blasted academy that's all male white.

00:26:11.000 You'd like me to go down where?

00:26:13.000 Where?

00:26:13.000 You know, funny thing is, if she was doing that in Easy A, it would have been entertaining.

00:26:21.000 Yeah, that's the clip they show?

00:26:22.000 Yes.

00:26:23.000 Compare that with Renee Zellweger and Jerry Maguire.

00:26:25.000 Or, I mean, Rod Tidwell.

00:26:27.000 Or anything else.

00:26:29.000 Or compare it with, you know what, I will say this, Monique.

00:26:32.000 When you watch the clip, you're like, just give her the damn award.

00:26:35.000 Or Nick Nolte and Warrior.

00:26:36.000 They're showing clips from films.

00:26:38.000 This is a clip?

00:26:39.000 Hold on.

00:26:40.000 Look at this.

00:26:43.000 Maybe we will think of a use for it one day.

00:26:46.000 Sometimes it is hard to remember whether you have loaded the pellet or not.

00:26:50.000 I do fear confusion and accidents.

00:26:54.000 Oh look, what kind of emotion is that supposed to evoke?

00:26:57.000 They are picking the best clip from these films.

00:27:00.000 I think I rather forgot to load the pellets.

00:27:03.000 Give her the award!

00:27:05.000 Regina King!

00:27:07.000 Well, come on, let's be honest here.

00:27:10.000 Is anyone surprised?

00:27:11.000 You look at that lineup, and it looks like the cast of Powder.

00:27:14.000 With the exception of this one woman in the show that nobody watched.

00:27:19.000 There was Hispanic from Roma, right?

00:27:21.000 But it was in three white ladies.

00:27:23.000 Hold on a second, let's see what this award speech is.

00:27:25.000 We have our own awards we have to give away.

00:27:27.000 Do we?

00:27:28.000 I want to hear this, let's bring this up so we can hear it.

00:27:29.000 We're going to have to drink a lot during this, I think.

00:27:33.000 I gotta find that list of words and cross them out.

00:27:35.000 I'm trying to burp off mic.

00:27:36.000 I don't have headphones, so hopefully it's not as severe as it seems.

00:27:39.000 I look better than that award, by the way.

00:27:40.000 Just saying.

00:27:41.000 Yeah.

00:27:42.000 You'd rather her be fondling you.

00:27:44.000 No.

00:27:44.000 Let's be honest, that's a nice dress.

00:27:45.000 She looks very fetching.

00:27:47.000 I like her.

00:27:47.000 Hold on, I want to listen to this.

00:27:49.000 Representing one of the greatest artists of our time, James Baldwin.

00:27:55.000 It's a little surreal.

00:28:03.000 James Baldwin birthed this baby.

00:28:06.000 I'm not entirely sure that I agree.

00:28:07.000 You buried, you nurtured her.

00:28:10.000 You surrounded her with so much love and support.

00:28:15.000 So it's appropriate for me to be standing here.

00:28:17.000 I'm an example of what it looks like when support and love is part of someone's mom.

00:28:20.000 Let me look at the schedule here.

00:28:21.000 Our first guest we have is going to be Clint Howard.

00:28:23.000 Let's...

00:28:24.000 We'll have Clint Howard.

00:28:25.000 Before Clint Howard, we'll have the trivia.

00:28:26.000 Well, let's give our award.

00:28:27.000 And then we'll do our trivia question, and we'll answer it after Clint Howard.

00:28:28.000 Hold on a second.

00:28:29.000 I'm crying.

00:28:33.000 Brian.

00:28:35.000 It's okay, everyone's gotta be moving a little bit because the whole thing started late.

00:28:39.000 There's nothing interesting going on at 6.30.

00:28:40.000 God is always leaning, always has been leaning in my direction.

00:28:46.000 Gamoses.

00:28:48.000 They'll ask me about that later.

00:28:50.000 Gamoses?

00:28:51.000 I think she meant to say mimosas.

00:28:53.000 So many people to thank.

00:28:54.000 Chelsea Barnum, who brought this project to Anna Purna, Megan Ellenson, Anna Purna, Plan B, this amazing cast.

00:29:07.000 Plan B is a production company.

00:29:08.000 My sister's in art.

00:29:09.000 She didn't just plug birth control.

00:29:10.000 That's what I thought.

00:29:11.000 In the middle of agents and representatives randomly.

00:29:14.000 Emma, Rachel, it's been an honor to have my name be just said with yours.

00:29:22.000 They all have to act like they're not crying right now because they lost.

00:29:24.000 It's been pretty amazing.

00:29:25.000 The Rivers family.

00:29:27.000 Kiki, Coleman, Tiana, Stefan.

00:29:32.000 Saying that I hope she gets me to the after party.

00:29:34.000 God is good.

00:29:35.000 All the time.

00:29:36.000 This is what they are saying.

00:29:37.000 I'm not saying that.

00:29:38.000 She said something good at the end.

00:29:39.000 God is good all the time.

00:29:40.000 That takes guts.

00:29:41.000 God is good all the time.

00:29:42.000 There you go.

00:29:43.000 I wish I could say the same for Maya Rudolph.

00:29:46.000 Uh, yes.

00:29:48.000 Jason Momoa.

00:29:51.000 Jason Girl Scout Cookie.

00:29:52.000 Did they always lead with Best Actress?

00:29:55.000 It's almost like no one here is on the same page right now.

00:29:58.000 You're just going with completely different topics.

00:30:00.000 Let's stick to what's happening right now.

00:30:02.000 They just did Best Actress!

00:30:03.000 How is that not fitting?

00:30:05.000 Supporting Actress.

00:30:06.000 No, it was Best Actress in a leading role, wasn't it?

00:30:07.000 No, it was Supporting Actress.

00:30:09.000 Hold on, let's see what he has to say here really quickly.

00:30:10.000 Honestly, I swear to God that Jason and I didn't coordinate our outfits tonight.

00:30:16.000 This is purely accidental.

00:30:18.000 But, you know, it just goes to show, doesn't it, that these days a Hawaiian god and a very mature English woman can actually wear the same colours.

00:30:26.000 These days, a man who in no parallel universe could possibly be nominated for an award shares a stage with me because we really squandered a host.

00:30:34.000 Documentary Filmmakers.

00:30:36.000 Oh, Documentary Filmmakers.

00:30:37.000 All right.

00:30:37.000 Listen, let's give out... We actually have our own Lotta with Crowder Award, don't we?

00:30:40.000 Yes!

00:30:41.000 We have right now, if I'm not mistaken, our first award of the evening is actually going to be... Do we have a drum roll ready here?

00:30:49.000 We have right now the Lotta with Crowder Award for Best Actor... We have it?

00:30:55.000 We have it going?

00:30:55.000 I think we have it.

00:30:56.000 For Best Actor in a Leading Role... Hold on, let me have the envelope here really quickly.

00:31:00.000 Best Actor in a Leading Role is...

00:31:07.000 Jesse Smollett, everybody.

00:31:08.000 Jesse Smollett, Louder With Crowder.

00:31:11.000 That's awesome.

00:31:13.000 Is that not going in through?

00:31:14.000 Alright, let's go with that.

00:31:16.000 I'm seeing myself there.

00:31:17.000 Yeah.

00:31:18.000 Jesse Smollett.

00:31:19.000 Is it going through?

00:31:19.000 Are we sending it through Jesse Smollett?

00:31:21.000 This is Jesse Smollett's first nomination for a Louder With Crowder award.

00:31:25.000 And win.

00:31:26.000 Jesse Smollett.

00:31:28.000 Come out here and get your Louder With Crowder award.

00:31:29.000 I will never be the man that this did not happen to.

00:31:34.000 I am forever changed.

00:31:36.000 And actually, Justin Smollett couldn't be here this evening, so we have Maximus the PA.

00:31:40.000 People can follow you on Twitter.

00:31:41.000 Who are you wearing tonight?

00:31:45.000 I'm wearing Mary Poppins, even.

00:31:47.000 Thanks a lot for that.

00:31:48.000 Best actor.

00:31:49.000 So, what's happening here?

00:31:53.000 So, I'm accepting this because Justice Mullet obviously could not be here.

00:31:58.000 He would like to say that even though his mind, body, and spirit is strong, unfortunately, his employment is not.

00:32:04.000 I see what you did there.

00:32:05.000 Please leave.

00:32:06.000 You're making us all incredibly uncomfortable.

00:32:08.000 I'm having a hard time hearing him.

00:32:09.000 He said he couldn't be here.

00:32:10.000 His employment is not strong, but his spirit is.

00:32:12.000 Oh, is that what he said?

00:32:13.000 Could we not hear him?

00:32:13.000 We're having a little difficulty just making sure Mary Poppins was heard.

00:32:16.000 Oh, okay.

00:32:17.000 Well, thank you.

00:32:17.000 I don't have the headphones on right now.

00:32:19.000 Do we have our first guest?

00:32:22.000 Let's see.

00:32:23.000 Can someone give me a hand signal?

00:32:25.000 Do we have our first guest?

00:32:26.000 We're calling right now.

00:32:27.000 We're going to ring up Clint Howard very soon.

00:32:30.000 I do think this is important to note here tonight.

00:32:32.000 We're calling him.

00:32:34.000 Oh, these are really weird.

00:32:35.000 If you look at the way they're cutting these things, it doesn't seem like the sound is on.

00:32:38.000 We have sound problems, but we don't have the budget of the Academy.

00:32:42.000 Hey!

00:32:44.000 All right, I guess our first guest of the evening, everybody.

00:32:46.000 He has more film credits to his name than anyone that I know.

00:32:49.000 Yes.

00:32:50.000 Clint Howard.

00:32:51.000 Clint Howard, how are you, sir?

00:32:53.000 Well, I'm getting dressed.

00:32:54.000 Oh my God.

00:32:56.000 Crazy.

00:32:57.000 Hold on a second.

00:32:57.000 We've got to bring Clint Howard in.

00:32:59.000 We lost him.

00:33:00.000 Did we lose him?

00:33:01.000 Clint Howard, turn on your camera, please.

00:33:03.000 I see you.

00:33:04.000 I know, but we don't see you.

00:33:07.000 Oh God.

00:33:08.000 You know what, that was a good thing because I'll tell you what, it tilted down and it may not have been like an appropriate angle.

00:33:19.000 We have Clint Howard and he has a face, yeah.

00:33:22.000 He played Susan Wojcicki.

00:33:24.000 Yeah.

00:33:25.000 It's kind of messed up cause I'd rather bang Susan Wojcicki, yeah.

00:33:30.000 How you doing there, Clint?

00:33:33.000 Well, hold on.

00:33:35.000 What is this?

00:33:35.000 This is... Clint, you're live right now out to tens of thousands of people, brother.

00:33:40.000 I'll tell you what, if I'm live right now, you're a fool.

00:33:46.000 Well, that's perfect for this program right now.

00:33:49.000 They're just giving away short documentaries.

00:33:51.000 So, Clint Howard, you're dressed up.

00:33:52.000 Are you going to an Oscars party tonight?

00:33:55.000 No, well, I'm with you, Steven.

00:33:57.000 Hang on, let me get my earbuds on.

00:33:59.000 Alright, okay, good.

00:34:01.000 Clint Howard is going to be getting his earbuds on.

00:34:03.000 We can hear you completely fine, Clint.

00:34:06.000 Oh, then you know what?

00:34:07.000 The earbuds can get somewhere where the sun doesn't shine.

00:34:13.000 My father's tuxedo.

00:34:15.000 My deceased father's tuxedo that he wore when his son won two Academy Awards.

00:34:20.000 Wow.

00:34:21.000 That's beautiful.

00:34:22.000 I don't know, it wasn't a damper for me.

00:34:27.000 me I was at home and I had tears in my eyes because I bet pretty heavily on Ron.

00:34:34.000 Okay, Clint, what's your favorite picture of the year this year?

00:34:40.000 If you had to pick yours.

00:34:44.000 Solo.

00:34:46.000 I think you're trying to slip in some royalty checks.

00:34:50.000 Do you actually not watch films, Clint?

00:34:52.000 Because I know you talk about how you don't see a ton, but you've been in the industry for so long.

00:34:54.000 Have you really not watched any this year?

00:34:58.000 I've seen two films.

00:34:59.000 I saw Appleseed, which was a little independent movie that my dad and I, I worked for my dad on.

00:35:04.000 He was the star.

00:35:05.000 It was right before he fell ill.

00:35:08.000 Good little art house movie.

00:35:09.000 And I saw Solo.

00:35:10.000 I actually saw Solo twice.

00:35:12.000 I saw Solo at the premiere.

00:35:17.000 And I missed my scene because there was a big guy with a very nice suit that was kind of slow moving that stood up and walked in front of me.

00:35:25.000 Yeah, that was Harvey Weinstein.

00:35:28.000 I was there with my manager and it was kind of embarrassing because I was like looking, you know, and I was off screen by the time, you know, the guy got out of the aisle.

00:35:40.000 I also saw The Next Morning with Charlie Sheen.

00:35:43.000 Okay, so you saw three films and your favorite was of course your own.

00:35:46.000 So when you saw the film the second time, did you get to see your scene there, Clint?

00:35:50.000 Oh yeah, I saw, yes, in 3D.

00:35:52.000 Because Charlie sort of, he fumbled and he bought tickets to a 3D showing.

00:35:58.000 Okay.

00:35:59.000 And he didn't really realize it.

00:36:00.000 So your face in 3D, does that just kind of pop it?

00:36:03.000 You see yourself in 3D, Clint Howard pop out at you?

00:36:06.000 Dude, it's weird.

00:36:09.000 It's weird for all of us.

00:36:10.000 You see, the film was not shot in 3D.

00:36:15.000 There's a process to make it be 3D.

00:36:18.000 And really what it is, is everything down the barrel in the middle of the frame just gets kind of pushed out.

00:36:25.000 And there's one shot in the picture where I'm in the middle of the frame and my face gets pushed out and it's weird.

00:36:32.000 I can imagine that it's weird.

00:36:33.000 I would imagine it's like, what was that film where the guy sees him, is it Time Cop?

00:36:37.000 Showgirls.

00:36:38.000 Showgirls.

00:36:39.000 I would love to see actually a Clint Howard rendition of Time Cop.

00:36:42.000 Yeah.

00:36:43.000 I think we should lobby for that.

00:36:44.000 By the way, it's hashtag Crowder anti-Oscars party.

00:36:46.000 We're going to have the costume contest winners up here next.

00:36:49.000 So you haven't seen Black Klansman.

00:36:51.000 You haven't seen, what was it, A Star is Born.

00:36:54.000 What about Roma on Netflix?

00:36:55.000 That's on Netflix.

00:36:56.000 Did you see Roma, Clint?

00:36:58.000 No.

00:37:00.000 Wow.

00:37:00.000 Alright.

00:37:00.000 That's good.

00:37:02.000 What do you expect this evening?

00:37:04.000 No host to the Oscars.

00:37:04.000 Do you expect this to be the worst Oscars ceremony you think ever?

00:37:07.000 Do you expect a lot of politicizing as one of the few right-leaning people?

00:37:12.000 Oh, no!

00:37:13.000 Getting political?

00:37:15.000 Oh, no.

00:37:16.000 My brethren would never do that.

00:37:18.000 Does it bother you when they do that, or is it just sort of par for the course, Clint?

00:37:22.000 Okay, in all honesty, a couple of years ago, I did watch a couple of minutes of the Screen Actors Guild Awards.

00:37:29.000 Sure.

00:37:30.000 And, you know, I know that, listen, they get liquored up and it's a party and a dinner kind of thing.

00:37:35.000 Right.

00:37:36.000 And they were encouraging harumphing, harumphing, harumphing.

00:37:39.000 Well, a couple of people tore in to the president.

00:37:43.000 Okay.

00:37:45.000 And there was one guy in particular that just, it was beyond the pale.

00:37:51.000 And I have been to the Screen Actors Guild Awards.

00:37:53.000 I won a Screen Actors Guild Award.

00:37:55.000 I was part of the Apollo 13 ensemble.

00:37:59.000 It was just when the awards were starting.

00:38:02.000 So anyway, if I would have been there, I would have stood up and I would have I'm not a violent man, but you know what?

00:38:12.000 have picked up speed and I would have headbutted it. Really?

00:38:15.000 That is that count as a violent man. I'm not a violent man.

00:38:20.000 But you know what, there's a time and a place for discourse.

00:38:24.000 And doing it, obviously on a on a rigged platform where you got

00:38:30.000 a whole home team thing. And it's just you. Are you at all

00:38:35.000 concerned that you confuse humping with her own thing?

00:38:39.000 At the SAG Awards, a lot of liquor is flowing.

00:38:41.000 Listen, I've been spending the last three or four days humping furniture.

00:38:45.000 Right.

00:38:46.000 Because I had to move all my furniture out of my house.

00:38:49.000 Now, harumph is a whole other thing.

00:38:51.000 I mean, I only know that from Mel Brooks.

00:38:53.000 Oh, alright.

00:38:53.000 I thought you were humping the furniture as a method acting because you had an upcoming role where, you know, it required you to be trans species.

00:38:59.000 You know, I've never had sex.

00:39:03.000 I take that back.

00:39:03.000 I've raped a woman on screen.

00:39:06.000 I've never actually had sex with a woman on screen.

00:39:08.000 Key words there, on screen, by the way.

00:39:10.000 Key words there, on screen.

00:39:11.000 Someone could cut that and just, Clint Howard, I raped a... Oh no, I'm a virgin!

00:39:15.000 Yes.

00:39:15.000 I'm a virgin.

00:39:16.000 Well, rape notwithstanding, according to your previous statement.

00:39:20.000 Let's continue, this is going really well.

00:39:21.000 Okay, Clint Howard, you have to bet here.

00:39:23.000 You have to bet who you think is going to win Best Picture and then we have to let you go.

00:39:27.000 Just place a bet here and the winner gets a, I don't know, you'll get this Freddie Mercury ticket.

00:39:31.000 What, there's 10 nominees?

00:39:34.000 I think there's 5.

00:39:36.000 No, there's 8.

00:39:37.000 There's 8.

00:39:37.000 That's right, there's 8.

00:39:41.000 You know, I know Spike Lee will win.

00:39:44.000 Right.

00:39:46.000 I can imagine.

00:39:47.000 Because melanin?

00:39:49.000 Black Klansmen may win.

00:39:51.000 Okay, alright.

00:39:52.000 I don't know.

00:39:52.000 I haven't seen whatever politically... Clint Howard, are you not wearing pants?

00:39:58.000 No, I've got pants on.

00:40:00.000 You just didn't tuck in your shirt.

00:40:01.000 No, I don't want to see.

00:40:03.000 Okay, okay, alright.

00:40:05.000 You know what?

00:40:05.000 You have an incredible skill at making... I don't trust me.

00:40:08.000 I don't trust you at all because you called us nude from your hot tub one time and that required a lot of editing and post and this is live right now, Clint.

00:40:14.000 Oh, yeah.

00:40:16.000 How many layers of clothing do you wear when you get your hot tub?

00:40:21.000 I don't typically call national programs when in a hot tub, but I understand why you would.

00:40:25.000 Clint Howard, we do have to go.

00:40:26.000 I appreciate it.

00:40:27.000 Love you, brother.

00:40:28.000 Black Klansman.

00:40:29.000 We're running a little late, but maybe we'll check back in with you.

00:40:32.000 That was Clint Howard, of course.

00:40:33.000 Right now, what award are they giving?

00:40:35.000 Let's bring the audio back up here so everyone can see.

00:40:37.000 It looks like they're just showing a clip of Vice, but people on Twitter... Was that just the guitar player from Audioslave?

00:40:44.000 Yes, it was.

00:40:45.000 That was the guitarist from Audioslave?

00:40:46.000 He was in Vice?

00:40:48.000 There's no way what he said wasn't political, so I'm just gonna drink.

00:40:51.000 Yeah, I can imagine.

00:40:52.000 Who's he?

00:40:52.000 Stephon James, I'm not sure.

00:40:53.000 Who's she?

00:40:53.000 Who's he?

00:40:54.000 Who's she?

00:40:55.000 Who is that man?

00:41:04.000 What?

00:41:04.000 That's Applejack, man!

00:41:06.000 Come on!

00:41:08.000 Name that movie line on Twitter, you get a free t-shirt.

00:41:10.000 Do I count?

00:41:11.000 No.

00:41:14.000 What's wrong with her?

00:41:15.000 Is she playing the new Chucky doll in the Redux of Child's Play?

00:41:19.000 Can anyone confirm that for me on Twitter?

00:41:23.000 This is one of those categories that is almost always won by the period films.

00:41:28.000 I do think this should go to Vice, because Christian Bale did an unbelievable job, but a lot of people don't realize that without that makeup job, he wouldn't have the same kind of role.

00:41:38.000 Greg Canham, Kate Biscoe, and Patricia Dehaney for Vice.

00:41:41.000 There you go, for Vice.

00:41:42.000 Good job.

00:41:43.000 Alright, hold on.

00:41:43.000 Let's start listening to the speech, and then we actually have tonight's 7 plus 1.

00:41:47.000 Let's go to the speech first.

00:41:48.000 We'll watch this, and our 7, it's actually top 7 cancelled Jesse Smollett projects.

00:41:53.000 He was anticipating an Oscar this year.

00:41:55.000 It could have been about 4.

00:41:56.000 So send and tweet at S. Crowder, hashtag Crowder anti-Oscars party, which Jesse Smollett vehicles, you think, got cancelled.

00:42:02.000 I was actually surprised he had 7 projects in the first place.

00:42:05.000 I was very surprised as well.

00:42:06.000 I really thought that, you know, he had two projects going.

00:42:09.000 Was Empire?

00:42:10.000 Yes.

00:42:11.000 And then, hopefully, Empire 2, if there were a spin-off.

00:42:13.000 They're not very creative with the title.

00:42:15.000 Yeah, he wanted it.

00:42:15.000 He was hoping for the Money Dust.

00:42:16.000 It was just a fake hate crime.

00:42:17.000 Not gonna get it.

00:42:17.000 Money Dust.

00:42:18.000 Well, thank you, Adam Perna.

00:42:19.000 Our great director, Adam McKay.

00:42:23.000 Christian Bale.

00:42:24.000 What a... Alright.

00:42:26.000 Oh, you're here.

00:42:29.000 Here you go.

00:42:30.000 Go ahead.

00:42:32.000 Take our time.

00:42:32.000 That's you.

00:42:33.000 Who's afraid of that?

00:42:35.000 No, I already did.

00:42:38.000 Plan B, Gary Sanchez.

00:42:39.000 This is like going to my grandparents' house for Thanksgiving dinner.

00:42:42.000 What?

00:42:44.000 Do you have the stuffing?

00:42:46.000 Grace?

00:42:47.000 She died seven years ago.

00:42:49.000 I got the reference, but it was ill-timed.

00:42:52.000 You're so great to work with and create with and everything.

00:42:56.000 Thank you.

00:42:57.000 Amy Adams, thank you for bringing us up to your level of commitment.

00:43:04.000 This is so uncomfortable.

00:43:05.000 You think this show is uncomfortable to watch right now?

00:43:07.000 This is the most uncomfortable award ceremony I've ever seen.

00:43:10.000 Oh, it is Sam Rothblatt.

00:43:12.000 Susan Matheson.

00:43:14.000 Jeff Waxman.

00:43:16.000 Just read it, guys.

00:43:17.000 All right, let's bring up, let's go right now to actually, we have four this evening.

00:43:22.000 This week's Crowder is 7 plus 1.

00:43:27.000 So again, for people who are still paying attention, we apologize.

00:43:30.000 We cannot control the Oscars.

00:43:32.000 But we can control what we do here, and we actually prepared.

00:43:35.000 So, 7 plus 1 again for those who forgot.

00:43:37.000 Top 7 cancelled Jussie Smollett projects.

00:43:41.000 He was really pining for an Oscar here this year.

00:43:42.000 He was hoping.

00:43:43.000 Really hoping.

00:43:44.000 Number 7!

00:43:45.000 In the hoax of the night.

00:43:47.000 Yeah, that's going right there.

00:43:48.000 That would have been good.

00:43:49.000 I think it would have been good.

00:43:50.000 That would have been good. I think it would have been good.

00:43:52.000 They call me Mr. Fake Hate Crime.

00:43:55.000 Mr. It's the Mr. part that sells it.

00:43:57.000 No, it's Mr. Tips, but you've never seen it.

00:43:59.000 No, I did.

00:44:00.000 Number six, Rodigan, number six.

00:44:01.000 Lying gaze in the hood.

00:44:03.000 Gaze with a Z. Yeah, lying gaze in the hood.

00:44:06.000 What the hell am I looking at on television?

00:44:08.000 I think that's Melissa McCarthy, if I'm not mistaken.

00:44:11.000 Are those cats animals?

00:44:11.000 They're running a train on that stage.

00:44:13.000 I believe that's Melissa McCarthy and Will.i.am.

00:44:17.000 This is not weird at all.

00:44:18.000 It's Shaquille O'Neal as well, I am?

00:44:20.000 That's not Shaquille.

00:44:22.000 Is that three quarters back, Gary?

00:44:23.000 I have no idea, but I bet you our seven plus one is funnier than this.

00:44:25.000 Let's continue with it.

00:44:26.000 Number five, again, these are canceled Jesse Smollett projects that he was hoping to win an Oscar with.

00:44:32.000 Number five, saving private check receipts.

00:44:35.000 Yeah, this was one.

00:44:36.000 That's a good idea.

00:44:37.000 Good idea.

00:44:38.000 Actually, it's a better idea to not write a check if you're committing a crime in the first place.

00:44:41.000 Especially if you're hiring your personal trainer to tune up.

00:44:43.000 Was it $900,000?

00:44:43.000 No, it was like $25,000.

00:44:47.000 No, 2,500.

00:44:48.000 I was exaggerating.

00:44:49.000 You're just inaccurate.

00:44:51.000 Big difference here.

00:44:56.000 Number four.

00:44:57.000 Why don't you read number four?

00:44:59.000 Sleepless in the slammer.

00:45:00.000 He'll never be sleepless.

00:45:03.000 They won't necessarily be restless nights.

00:45:05.000 It's not going to be someone rubbing his sores like the Queen, exactly.

00:45:10.000 Maybe they will.

00:45:11.000 Number 3.

00:45:12.000 I'm surprised you signed on to this project.

00:45:12.000 Number 3 again.

00:45:13.000 Top 7 cancelled Jesse Smollett projects.

00:45:15.000 Number 3.

00:45:15.000 The Gay, the Black, and the Ugly.

00:45:17.000 Yeah.

00:45:18.000 It almost seems like that's just an insult title.

00:45:20.000 Yes.

00:45:20.000 And not a genuine film title.

00:45:22.000 Yeah.

00:45:23.000 Either way, it works.

00:45:24.000 Number 2.

00:45:25.000 Catch Me If You Can, colon, oh wait, you just did.

00:45:28.000 Yeah, that's number 2.

00:45:29.000 That's number 2.

00:45:31.000 And you know what?

00:45:31.000 You have this one there.

00:45:33.000 Number 1.

00:45:33.000 Jesse Smollett cancelled project.

00:45:36.000 Empire.

00:45:37.000 Strikes back.

00:45:38.000 Empire Strikes Back.

00:45:39.000 And of course, there's always one in the chamber.

00:45:40.000 People often forget about it.

00:45:41.000 The Plus One cancelled Jussie Smollett project.

00:45:44.000 Liar, liar.

00:45:46.000 Though interesting enough, still starring Jim Carrey.

00:45:48.000 It's really more of a Jim Carrey vehicle with Jussie Smollett just happens to be in it.

00:45:52.000 I think he played the driver.

00:45:53.000 No, he plays the father-in-law.

00:45:55.000 Originally, it was the dad from Princess Bride.

00:45:57.000 But in this case, it's just him and his personal trainer hitting him with a hammer.

00:46:00.000 Yeah, oh wait, he's not happy with his salary on this movie.

00:46:02.000 He just committed another hoax hate crime.

00:46:04.000 Sorry.

00:46:04.000 This is true.

00:46:05.000 Yes, he's that male anthrax to himself.

00:46:08.000 He upped his game a little bit.

00:46:10.000 It was just powdered sugar in a manila envelope.

00:46:12.000 That has been this week's Crowder's 7 Plus 1 Oscars theme.

00:46:18.000 You forgot Stefan in the chamber!

00:46:20.000 Should never forget the one in the chamber.

00:46:21.000 I was about to say you should never forget the one in the chamber.

00:46:25.000 Well no, I was going to say the hate crime was going to be against the fake rabbits that are on Melissa McCarthy's dress.

00:46:30.000 Possibly against Melissa McCarthy.

00:46:32.000 Yeah, possibly.

00:46:33.000 I'm pretty sure she's not a member of PETA.

00:46:35.000 You don't get that size eating vegetables.

00:46:38.000 All right, listen guys, we're actually going, so trivia, before we come back from the break, we're going to show your best costumes, okay?

00:46:44.000 Tweet them at Ask Crowder, but we also have trivia right now.

00:46:47.000 Whoever answers this question correctly gets a lock of Gerald Morgan's hair.

00:46:52.000 No, I'm not giving that away.

00:46:54.000 Question, actually, these are accurate questions here.

00:46:56.000 They're true questions, so we want you to answer accurately.

00:46:58.000 I get that, you know, we like to have a bit of fun.

00:47:00.000 We like to have a laugh, but these questions are important.

00:47:03.000 What is Ilhan Omar's favorite comedy?

00:47:07.000 By the way, before we go to the break, I should tell you this.

00:47:09.000 Ilhan Omar's favorite comedy.

00:47:11.000 Comedy.

00:47:12.000 What is Ilhan Omar's favorite comedy?

00:47:14.000 We are going to go to a...

00:47:15.000 Oh, by the way, before we go to the break, I should tell you this.

00:47:17.000 A lot of people have been complaining about cultural appropriation here.

00:47:20.000 Yes.

00:47:21.000 At the Oscars this year, and at the program.

00:47:23.000 Oscars 200.

00:47:24.000 And if you look at a lot of the roles, some of the roles a lot of people don't know they do profiles on them.

00:47:28.000 But they weren't able to because they didn't have a host this year.

00:47:31.000 We have profiles in all of these individual roles.

00:47:34.000 Some of them have been accused of culturally appropriating.

00:47:37.000 I'm not sure that I entirely agree, but we'll go to this break.

00:47:40.000 We'll be back in a few minutes with your answer to trivia.

00:47:42.000 Here we go, for your consideration.

00:47:43.000 We'll be right back.

00:47:45.000 For your consideration, for Best Actor in a Leading Role, Tom Cruise in Gandhi.

00:47:53.000 Now I'm asking you to fight.

00:47:56.000 To fight against their anger, not to provoke it.

00:48:01.000 We will not strike a blow.

00:48:03.000 We will not strike a blow.

00:48:04.000 They may torture my body, break my bones, and even kill me!

00:48:10.000 They will have my dead body.

00:48:14.000 But not my obedience.

00:48:16.000 Applause.

00:48:24.000 Music.

00:48:34.000 Music.

00:48:42.000 I've lived most of my life out on YouTube with only a little channel, a handful of subscribers.

00:48:49.000 I reckon they didn't like me on the platform run bit.

00:48:55.000 Back then it was mostly just me uploading short videos and me talking to my camera.

00:48:59.000 I ain't had nothing but a bed sheet, a camera, a couple of microphones down there.

00:49:09.000 Back then, the Young Turks used to make quite a bit of sport of me.

00:49:14.000 They teased me quite a bit.

00:49:17.000 I got to the point where I could feed Hopper cheese and biscuits four times a week.

00:49:21.000 But mostly, I just sat out there making videos on my channel.

00:49:29.000 Well, one night, I was doing much of nothing, just staring at the YouTube, searching on a PragerU video for the Electoral College.

00:49:41.000 All I could find was some nerd trying to make up tutorials in my suggested feed.

00:49:48.000 So I logged into my YouTube account to see what was wrong with it.

00:49:54.000 Turns out every video had been put in restricted.

00:49:56.000 I've even been unsubscribed from Light Earth Crater, my favorite channel.

00:50:04.000 I had to re-subscribe quite a bit.

00:50:09.000 But even when I did, I didn't receive no notifications.

00:50:14.000 Had to hit the bell three times.

00:50:18.000 But then I ain't seen nothing but Trevor Noah videos in my suggested feed.

00:50:26.000 But then I'd just seen Red.

00:50:27.000 So I hired myself a half-Asian lawyer.

00:50:33.000 Some people think he's half-Mexican and he's half-Asian.

00:50:39.000 He's got almond little shaped eyes and hair that stick out straight out the side of his head.

00:50:44.000 Don't matter how he cut it, I reckon.

00:50:48.000 He'd just puff out like that, black as pitch.

00:50:52.000 Because he's half Asian and whatnot.

00:50:56.000 Well, I had my little builder go on in and talk with YouTube's top lawyers.

00:51:01.000 Parlay with them about our questions on my channel.

00:51:07.000 But they didn't answer none of it.

00:51:11.000 Not the restrictions and monetization.

00:51:13.000 They just kept asking us to spend more money on advertising.

00:51:18.000 Screaming, what'd you do Trinibane for?

00:51:21.000 What'd you do Trinibane for?

00:51:26.000 I reckon that made me madder than the whole notification business.

00:51:32.000 So I had Bill Richmond.

00:51:34.000 He's half Asian.

00:51:35.000 Some people think he's half Mexican.

00:51:37.000 He's half Asian.

00:51:40.000 I had him walk right on in to Susan Wojcicki's office at YouTube.

00:51:47.000 Sure.

00:51:48.000 I knew you'd come back.

00:52:12.000 Thank God.

00:52:18.000 Anybody want some Mud Club?

00:52:21.000 Hopper, cost $90.90 a year.

00:52:23.000 $60.90 for students in the active military.

00:52:26.000 Oh, come on, Quarter Black.

00:52:27.000 I don't need that.

00:52:27.000 I can't laugh right now.

00:52:29.000 So you haven't seen the puppy?

00:52:32.000 Oh, come on.

00:52:32.000 No, I was waiting to see her together.

00:52:35.000 I seen the kid.

00:52:37.000 Kid's a winner.

00:52:37.000 He's got a head just like you, Hopper.

00:52:40.000 Oh, there she is now.

00:52:41.000 Look at her.

00:52:42.000 Hey, there's your big brother, puppy.

00:52:45.000 Is that it?

00:52:45.000 Oh, Hopper, I can't believe it.

00:52:48.000 She's really ours.

00:52:50.000 Thank you.

00:52:51.000 Oh, come on.

00:52:51.000 Now you've done all the work, Hopper.

00:52:53.000 I can't believe you've done this.

00:52:55.000 Hey.

00:52:56.000 Believe me, we did.

00:52:58.000 Oh, no.

00:53:00.000 She ain't got a name.

00:53:01.000 What do we call her, Hopper?

00:53:03.000 Betty's a great name.

00:53:05.000 Yeah, Betty's a pretty good name.

00:53:07.000 Yeah, Betty's okay.

00:53:09.000 Oh, Hop, she's the best I've ever seen.

00:53:12.000 You've really done good.

00:53:14.000 You've really done good.

00:53:15.000 Oh, you look so tired.

00:53:17.000 Why don't you shave that gross thing?

00:53:21.000 Uh, no, no, I feel great.

00:53:23.000 I feel great.

00:53:24.000 Listen, I was thinking, if you don't want me mixing around on YouTube no more, you know, you don't want no more of the Mohammed cartoons or the Tranny jokes, I was thinking, maybe I'm not gonna do the show.

00:53:37.000 You know, we can make some other way.

00:53:39.000 There's one thing I want you to do for me.

00:53:42.000 What is that?

00:53:43.000 Come here.

00:53:44.000 What?

00:53:46.000 Bring the show back.

00:53:50.000 Bring the show back.

00:53:52.000 What are we waiting for?

00:53:53.000 I'm on retainer here!

00:54:00.000 Yeah!

00:54:02.000 I'm on retainer here!

00:54:19.000 Oof!

00:54:20.000 Hurry up!

00:54:21.000 Faster!

00:54:21.000 Oh Oh

00:54:25.000 Oh Oh

00:54:29.000 Yeah the more I know

00:54:59.000 Anarchist Parade!

00:55:00.000 No, chef!

00:55:01.000 Trevor Noah!

00:55:03.000 Candle Black!

00:55:03.000 Oh Oh

00:55:07.000 the black money

00:55:35.000 It's gonna be a bright show, baby, yeah!

00:55:36.000 It's implosive!

00:55:36.000 It's like the Joker!

00:55:37.000 I'm just trying to stay!

00:55:37.000 There he is!

00:55:37.000 Yeah!

00:55:39.000 It's gonna be a bright show, baby, yeah!

00:55:41.000 That's it, Pelosi!

00:55:43.000 You've hit the jukebox!

00:55:45.000 I'm just trying to stay!

00:55:49.000 There he is!

00:56:03.000 Yeah!

00:56:05.000 Alright, we're back!

00:56:09.000 Hey, by the way, we're not back on YouTube, so for those of you watching, we have a little phone here on Instagram.

00:56:14.000 Go to the Facebook page.

00:56:15.000 I don't even know my Facebook page.

00:56:16.000 Is Steven Crowder official?

00:56:18.000 I just searched Steven Crowder.

00:56:20.000 Okay, if you're on Instagram right now, we've actually put this... I don't know if we can go to a long shot.

00:56:23.000 We have a makeshift ladder up here right now with a phone.

00:56:27.000 You have no sound on Instagram.

00:56:28.000 People who are on Instagram right now, go watch the stream on Facebook.

00:56:31.000 We were hit with... There you go.

00:56:32.000 Can you show that again?

00:56:33.000 And it's still better produced than the Oscars.

00:56:34.000 What happened?

00:56:36.000 We were at 40,000 people watching on YouTube, our biggest stream ever, and end-mounting, by the way.

00:56:41.000 That was with only one guest.

00:56:42.000 And then ABC decided to hit us with a copyright strike.

00:56:45.000 Now here's something that's really important.

00:56:47.000 Just so you know, you pieces of shit, the story just changed.

00:56:51.000 Yep.

00:56:51.000 You look like idiots.

00:56:53.000 This is the problem right now.

00:56:53.000 They're talking about how things are shifting with Roma and how things are shifting with old media, right?

00:56:58.000 Hold on a second, guys.

00:56:58.000 Let's keep the volume down there because I really am pissed and I can't hear myself because we can't play the audio now, so all I hear is you guys.

00:57:04.000 And that's not your fault.

00:57:05.000 That's the fault of ABC and YouTube.

00:57:07.000 We can't play the stream for you.

00:57:08.000 We can't commentate on the stream.

00:57:10.000 What is the Oscars?

00:57:11.000 What are the Oscars this year?

00:57:12.000 It's pure propaganda.

00:57:13.000 Go watch Vice.

00:57:14.000 Go watch Blackkklansman.

00:57:16.000 Go watch all the shit that they're showing.

00:57:17.000 And what are we doing?

00:57:18.000 We are clearly transforming the Oscars.

00:57:21.000 That's the rule of copyright law, okay?

00:57:23.000 It's A, are you doing direct parody?

00:57:25.000 If so, it's okay.

00:57:27.000 Well, obviously we know about single-party consent states.

00:57:29.000 Then it's, is this transformative enough for this to constitute new art?

00:57:32.000 That's how we won our legal case with Shia LaBeouf's You Will Not Divide Us livestream.

00:57:36.000 By the way, make no mistake, we've never lost.

00:57:38.000 We're going to have a half-Asian pitbull so far up your ass.

00:57:42.000 He's going to need to get a sigmoidoscope, you pieces of s***.

00:57:46.000 You want to push propaganda out there and then try and hit us with a copyright strike

00:57:50.000 saying that we're somehow stealing or lifting your content?

00:57:53.000 By the way, we have more content prepared for this Oscars livestream than you prepared

00:57:57.000 all year, dumbasses.

00:57:59.000 This is the problem.

00:58:00.000 At one point you could silence people like us, but now people like us can watch your

00:58:05.000 propagandizing a**, I don't even know if that's a word, and call motherf*****s out.

00:58:09.000 Yeah, I'm cussing, I get it, it's live, people are upset.

00:58:11.000 Instagram, you can go to Facebook right now.

00:58:12.000 This entire story just changed because you done messed up.

00:58:16.000 You thought you were going to hit the channel with a hard strike so we wouldn't be able to stream tonight?

00:58:20.000 Guess what?

00:58:21.000 We're streaming on Facebook, they might take us down!

00:58:24.000 Then we're coming after your shits legally, and we're getting this up as a clip.

00:58:27.000 We have different streams being recorded and tricasted right now.

00:58:29.000 We could remove your stupid Oscar stream.

00:58:31.000 And by the way, everyone watching, watch this stream on Facebook, and just turn on the Oscars on your television so you can watch along with us.

00:58:38.000 ABC Disney?

00:58:39.000 Is it ABC Disney?

00:58:40.000 You didn't think we could solve this shit?

00:58:42.000 The main reason that we're getting more viewers than you, the main reason we're kicking the shit out of your late night hosts, is because we're more flexible, we're smarter than you, and we actually create better content.

00:58:53.000 We create content on this show with one writer, and now an assistant writer, Brodigan and Pantel.

00:58:58.000 Three writers, effectively, that require 27 for you to create The Daily Show with Trevor Noah.

00:59:03.000 Which, by the way, hasn't been funny accidentally, just like Maya Rudolph on your precious fucking stream.

00:59:09.000 Here's the thing, you can take us down, I understand it.

00:59:12.000 You're well within your right to be wrong, but you're not well within your right to break the law.

00:59:17.000 And right now you're trying to silence people who are making you out to look like the fools that you are.

00:59:23.000 Make no mistake, this has happened before.

00:59:25.000 They've tried to silence us before.

00:59:26.000 It happened with Facebook, with the Gizmodo article.

00:59:28.000 They've been trying to throttle our page, from which you're probably watching.

00:59:31.000 By the way, Instagram, please go to the Facebook page, that's the only place we can stream right now.

00:59:35.000 It happened before, with copyright strikes on YouTube, and they tried to make it so that we could not stream, and it's happening again!

00:59:41.000 We've won every single time!

00:59:44.000 The law is on our side, more importantly, the people of the United States are on our side, and, most importantly, the funny is on our side, a**hole!

00:59:53.000 We've been watching this f***ing stream all night!

00:59:56.000 Please!

01:00:00.000 You made a mistake.

01:00:01.000 For crying out loud!

01:00:05.000 I don't want to do that, by the way.

01:00:06.000 I don't want to have to do this.

01:00:07.000 I don't want to be the Facebook rantin' eh-eh-eh-eh.

01:00:10.000 Champs America.

01:00:12.000 We wanted to have some jokes.

01:00:13.000 We had Michael Myers come out and make himself a Manhattan.

01:00:18.000 Okay?

01:00:18.000 This is not a serious stream.

01:00:21.000 Make no mistake, by the way, people who are watching, this is why you join up at MugClub.

01:00:23.000 If you're watching the Facebook livestream, this is why we have the costume contest.

01:00:26.000 I think a lot of people disconnect from how we make a living, okay?

01:00:30.000 How are we able to- Hopper's been responding well to chemo, by the way.

01:00:33.000 I didn't want to talk about this before because I didn't want to be going out there using it for you guys to join MugClub.

01:00:37.000 But guess what?

01:00:38.000 The only place I make a living, because of what you see tonight with YouTube, It's Mud Club.

01:00:42.000 It's your support.

01:00:43.000 By supporting the show, $99 a year right now, use Crowder Oscars promo code.

01:00:47.000 Isn't that a great f**k you to these people?

01:00:49.000 We're using your stream to give our people a discount and continue to eat away at your network.

01:00:55.000 We're like the remora who's gotten bigger than the shark.

01:01:00.000 This is so far beyond the realm of trying to silence the little guy.

01:01:04.000 You want to champion the little guy up here?

01:01:05.000 Was it only if he's a black tranny with rickets?

01:01:08.000 We're the little guy right here.

01:01:09.000 We're the underdog right here.

01:01:11.000 We're trying to create content for people who care, and everyone here makes a living off of Muggle.

01:01:15.000 This is why this is so important.

01:01:16.000 A lot of people say, oh, maybe I don't like Glenn Beck.

01:01:18.000 Maybe I don't like some other shows at the Blaze.

01:01:20.000 Listen, I understand that people have differences of opinions when it comes to all different on-air personalities.

01:01:25.000 I get along great with Mark Levin.

01:01:27.000 I get along with Glenn Beck.

01:01:28.000 I love Gavin McInnes.

01:01:31.000 But here's the deal.

01:01:32.000 If you're not supporting us here, you're supporting YouTube.

01:01:34.000 You're supporting the people who silence us through your silence.

01:01:38.000 Are we able to take care of Hopper?

01:01:39.000 Well, we're able to pay for chemo because you guys joined Mug Club.

01:01:42.000 How is everyone here able to make a living?

01:01:44.000 Well, it's because you people joined Mug Club.

01:01:45.000 How is everyone here able to afford healthcare?

01:01:47.000 Well, it's because you guys joined Mug Club.

01:01:49.000 And these people want you to disconnect, right?

01:01:51.000 Because you've been so disconnected for so long from the big Hollywood pictures, it's impersonal.

01:01:56.000 They're impersonal with us.

01:01:58.000 There's this disassociation that's occurred with people like us out there creating content, or people like PewDiePie.

01:02:03.000 They think if we hit them with a copyright strike, they'll go away.

01:02:06.000 They think that for some reason, we're not in the same industry that they are, even though we're hitting more viewers with less money.

01:02:12.000 So much less money, by the way.

01:02:15.000 So much less money.

01:02:16.000 So don't allow that to affect you.

01:02:18.000 Don't depersonalize it.

01:02:19.000 Don't disassociate with what's actually going on.

01:02:21.000 The only way we're able to do these streams, and tomorrow, we'll be able to get up and call our half-Asian SMU cum laude law grad, who's on retainer, is because of Mug Club.

01:02:31.000 It's because of Mug Club.

01:02:32.000 We're coming for you, and we're coming for all the marbles.

01:02:35.000 And by the way, that's not just rhetoric.

01:02:37.000 Look at the track record that we have here at Live with Crowder.

01:02:40.000 Look at the lawsuits that we f***ed.

01:02:42.000 In the same year, we settled out of court with Facebook, beat Shia LaBeouf's best friend, and The Guardian, or Daily Telegraph.

01:02:49.000 I don't remember which fat, angry lesbian it was.

01:02:51.000 It was one of them.

01:02:52.000 And by the way, Amy Schumer as well.

01:02:54.000 The same stuff happened when we did a review of Amy Schumer's Netflix special.

01:02:57.000 Obviously if you were just taking the stream and running it out there for free, that's a copyright violation.

01:03:03.000 You're simply stealing content.

01:03:05.000 You won't find a court in the world who will say that this was simply ripping the Oscars without any transformative aspect.

01:03:11.000 You dummies.

01:03:14.000 What do you think is going to happen?

01:03:17.000 We have more, I guess NBC is, we have more subscribers here on YouTube than you do to your night show!

01:03:22.000 To Seth Meyers!

01:03:24.000 And we certainly have more viewers than Trevor Noah or Stephen Colbert.

01:03:27.000 If you guys have a video that hits one million viewers, and by the way, I don't want to go out there and talk about our numbers all the time because numbers ebb and flow, but if you guys have a video that comes from a late night show that hits half of our average number, it's a f***ing event at your office!

01:03:42.000 You're throwing an office party!

01:03:44.000 Hey guys, you see that Stephen Colbert?

01:03:46.000 It was only on YouTube Trending next to the Trash Makeup Tutorials for four days.

01:03:50.000 It hit half a million.

01:03:51.000 Boy, that was a real barn burner, wasn't it?

01:03:53.000 I can blow my nose that we have more viewers than you.

01:03:56.000 And that's not to be arrogant.

01:03:57.000 That's not to brag about our numbers.

01:03:58.000 But it's to say how out of touch you are because you don't understand.

01:04:02.000 I bet you tread a lot more carefully.

01:04:04.000 If it were Seth Meyers, or if it were Trevor Noah.

01:04:06.000 What you don't understand is that this show has more viewers.

01:04:09.000 And by the way, a far more engaged audience.

01:04:11.000 I don't want anyone being doxed.

01:04:13.000 Don't go doxing the executives at ABC or Disney.

01:04:15.000 We don't want that.

01:04:16.000 Obviously, we rise above it.

01:04:17.000 But do send in your letters of complaint.

01:04:19.000 And of course, do join Mug Club, because we are coming for you.

01:04:22.000 Make no mistake.

01:04:23.000 And we haven't lost yet.

01:04:25.000 Maybe you'll get it right this time, but I wouldn't bet money on it.

01:04:27.000 By the way, the answer to the trivia question, what is Ilhan Omar's favorite comedy?

01:04:32.000 Schindler's List!

01:04:33.000 Yeah, that's the answer right there.

01:04:35.000 Just in case Facebook hadn't banned us yet.

01:04:38.000 He loved it.

01:04:38.000 Oh, those bastards.

01:04:39.000 Someone else take this right now because I'm a little pissed off.

01:04:42.000 I think they picked a fight that they're not going to be able to win.

01:04:44.000 And if you're watching out there right now, just like he said, now is the time to get pissed off.

01:04:47.000 The way that you fight stuff like this is by supporting Mug Club and making sure that people like you two can't silence voices of opposition.

01:04:54.000 We don't want voices silenced on either side.

01:04:56.000 We want everybody to be able to say stuff.

01:04:58.000 And if you think you tuned into the Oscars tonight just to watch the Oscars, I PAINTED LIKE AN ETHNIC OSCAR!

01:05:04.000 IT'S TRANSFORMED INTO ME!

01:05:07.000 OKAY?

01:05:08.000 I'M JUST SAYING!

01:05:09.000 IT'S STILL REAL TO ME, DAMMIT!

01:05:10.000 I CAN'T FIGURE THAT OUT!

01:05:11.000 IT'S STILL REAL TO ME!

01:05:13.000 I HAVE GOLD ON MY FACE!

01:05:15.000 DO YOU SEE THIS?

01:05:16.000 By the way, P.A.

01:05:17.000 of Maximus the P.A.

01:05:18.000 is in here for some reason.

01:05:19.000 I have no idea why.

01:05:20.000 He just wants to see the rain.

01:05:21.000 I have no idea.

01:05:22.000 This whole segment has been blown to crap.

01:05:24.000 I don't know what we have next.

01:05:25.000 Here's the other thing.

01:05:26.000 If the Oscars didn't suck, we would not be doing this.

01:05:29.000 We'd be watching the Oscars.

01:05:30.000 They were doing their jobs right!

01:05:31.000 They wouldn't need us!

01:05:32.000 We tried to make it funny!

01:05:33.000 It's insane to me.

01:05:34.000 Here's the thing.

01:05:34.000 Every time, and I'm so appreciative, I think like, man, well, we did so well last year.

01:05:38.000 Well, we're not going to have a bigger... We get a bigger stream because there's more and more of a thirst for this kind of content.

01:05:43.000 By the way, I don't think I'm the second coming of Christ to comedy at all.

01:05:46.000 I think that the people in this room are the only ones with the balls to stand up.

01:05:50.000 Why?

01:05:50.000 Because they're bullies.

01:05:51.000 Watch this right now.

01:05:52.000 I don't care if you're left or right.

01:05:53.000 This probably will be cut by a clip from someone.

01:05:55.000 Comment below and let me know.

01:05:56.000 When you see ABC and Disney taking down a stream for criticizing their event ceremony, which by the way, this is no different from everyone else.

01:06:05.000 Everyone knows that this Oscar ceremony sucks, just like James Franco and Anne Hathaway.

01:06:09.000 Tell me they're not the bullies.

01:06:11.000 Tell me they're not the guys in the schoolyard who deserve to be punched in the face.

01:06:14.000 This is what's happening, guys.

01:06:15.000 This is why your numbers are at record lows and ours continue to grow by the day.

01:06:21.000 It's because you're a bully.

01:06:22.000 And by the way, we have about 40% of our audience aren't even conservative Hollywood, it is not the length of your show, it's the quality of your show.

01:06:39.000 By the way, since this is gonna be going up tomorrow on YouTube, we'll just bleep tr**ny to make sure that they don't remove that also.

01:06:45.000 And I was watching Caribbean Enthusiasm of the Day, I think it was season 5, and Larry David repeatedly used the word tr**ny.

01:06:49.000 By the way, you've given awards to films that used the word tr**ny not long ago.

01:06:55.000 Oh my gosh.

01:06:55.000 What's going on there, Producer Tim?

01:07:00.000 You know what?

01:07:00.000 I think we're just going to roll with this right now because we have Cortez coming up soon.

01:07:05.000 Who do we have after Jim, actually?

01:07:07.000 I think we have Anne McElhinney.

01:07:09.000 How long can Jim Norton wait for us?

01:07:12.000 You know what?

01:07:12.000 Let's bring out Jim.

01:07:13.000 By the way, hit the notification column up there.

01:07:17.000 Hit the notification bell, Garrett, quarter black Garrett can get this going while you guys call him up on Skype.

01:07:22.000 What is it?

01:07:23.000 Notification bell, join Mug Club in case you haven't already done that.

01:07:25.000 And also, we've got Jim Norton, we've got Anthony Cumia, we already have funnier people than anyone who's doing comedy at the Oscars right now.

01:07:35.000 We have Jim.

01:07:37.000 We have Jim Norton, he looks like a baby, he's a funny motherf***er.

01:07:42.000 Sorry, I know I'm cussing because I get really mad when they try to remove our livelihoods.

01:07:46.000 Hold on here, the whole show map has been messed up because of what's been going on.

01:07:50.000 Jim Norton, is he there?

01:07:51.000 Do we have Jim Norton on right now?

01:07:53.000 Hold on one second, let me get Jim Norton's plug in here.

01:07:56.000 Of course, at Jim Norton on Twitter for as long as they allow it, and he'll be at the Orlando Improv March 15th and 16th.

01:08:01.000 San Francisco at Cobb's Comedy Club April 4th.

01:08:05.000 5th and 6th.

01:08:06.000 And people are not watching this on YouTube right now because it's been banned, but of course they'll see this in the archive and they'll realize... Who's not an a**hole?

01:08:13.000 Jim Norton, are you there, sir?

01:08:15.000 I'm here, man.

01:08:15.000 Can you hear me?

01:08:16.000 Oh, I can't hear him.

01:08:16.000 Can we get Jim Norton going?

01:08:18.000 Hold on one second there.

01:08:19.000 We can hear you, Jim.

01:08:19.000 We're just gonna turn the volume up on our end, buddy.

01:08:21.000 You're good.

01:08:21.000 Hold on one second.

01:08:22.000 We had to make some changes.

01:08:24.000 Can I hear... Jim, can you hear me, brother?

01:08:26.000 I can hear you, yes.

01:08:27.000 Okay, well thank you so much for sticking around.

01:08:28.000 I don't know if you've heard or been following, but our stream was just taken, it was at 40,000 viewers at any given second, and then ABC Disney said that it was a copyright violation because we're ridiculing the Oscars.

01:08:41.000 Well, do you do a thing, there's a way to do it, like Rogan will do these things with these fight companions?

01:08:46.000 Where you start it when they start it so you don't actually show it.

01:08:49.000 It's kind of a way of getting around that crap.

01:08:51.000 Yes, well here's the thing.

01:08:52.000 We did this last year and we weren't struck.

01:08:54.000 So, you know, that's kind of the consistency of applying the law.

01:08:57.000 And of course, as you know, right, it's transformative.

01:08:58.000 Like if someone takes a Jim Norton stand-up bit and just passes it off as their own, that's obviously stealing.

01:09:04.000 But if someone, let's say, takes your stand-up, let's say someone who doesn't like you and, you know, adds fart sounds and says Jim Norton sucks, obviously I'm sure you've dealt with this.

01:09:10.000 We have on our show.

01:09:10.000 We find it wildly funny.

01:09:13.000 You know, you don't try and take that stuff down, you're just like, alright, that's a critic.

01:09:17.000 Yeah, they're probably improving my material anyway.

01:09:21.000 I'm trying to find a place where I'm going to be well-lit.

01:09:22.000 Okay, here I am.

01:09:23.000 There's no place that will be well-lit.

01:09:24.000 You'll just be more lit.

01:09:26.000 You're right.

01:09:27.000 I'm lit.

01:09:28.000 Let me say something, Jim.

01:09:29.000 Before you continue, okay, when we're talking about this, by the way, ABC, Disney, you look at the people who tried to take us down, okay?

01:09:35.000 We have a drinking game going tonight, and obviously I'm very upset, so I don't have all my faculties.

01:09:39.000 I'm going to let you carry the load of this.

01:09:41.000 Of course, Cobb's Comedy Club, April 4th, 5th, and 6th.

01:09:44.000 Here's the thing.

01:09:45.000 First off, when you're looking at the people who are, politically, killing babies and silencing people who they disagree with.

01:09:50.000 Let's just say you watch the Oscars and they're silencing the stream, you go, alright, okay, they're the bullies.

01:09:54.000 Like Ben Midler right now.

01:09:54.000 And then if we're looking at comedy right now, the current state of comedy, they go, well, hold on a second, we got Jim Norton, I'm not including him here, he doesn't share my opinion, but if you look at Samantha Bee, Trevor Noah, Seth Meyers, right, and then you go on our side, you go, okay, we got Nick DiPaolo, we got Norm Macdonald, we got Dennis Miller, and then we have people who at least aren't dyed-in-the-wool leftists like Jim Norton, It's pretty clear to see where the funny lies.

01:10:15.000 Jim, I think you're one of the best stand-up comics working today.

01:10:18.000 And I side with guys like you.

01:10:21.000 Thanks, man.

01:10:22.000 Well, you know, it's hard to be funny while trying to tell other people they can't say certain things.

01:10:27.000 Like, my job isn't to police comedy.

01:10:29.000 I don't give a shit what people say.

01:10:31.000 It's not my business, as long as they're funny or trying to be funny.

01:10:33.000 Right, I know.

01:10:34.000 But this has changed so dramatically now.

01:10:36.000 I remember when we first had you on the show.

01:10:39.000 I can't remember.

01:10:39.000 It might have been two years ago.

01:10:41.000 And I remember the same thing with Nick DiPaolo.

01:10:42.000 You guys said, well, I see it on college campuses and a lot of comedians avoid college campuses, but I don't think it's going to be as severe in the clubs.

01:10:49.000 And now you see people like Nick DiPaolo saying, I mean, he got kicked by a broad in Birkenstocks and Bill Burr complaining about it.

01:10:55.000 Would you say that you misjudged that a little bit and that it has kind of seeped into the clubs at this point?

01:11:03.000 I'm such a dopey optimist.

01:11:05.000 Hey guys, the pendulum is going to swing back.

01:11:08.000 No it isn't.

01:11:09.000 The funny bone is going to stay funny.

01:11:12.000 It will not.

01:11:13.000 Me and Colin Quinn have been talking about this for 20 years.

01:11:16.000 It's going to swing back.

01:11:17.000 You hope against hope it's going to swing back.

01:11:19.000 It's not swinging back.

01:11:21.000 I was wrong.

01:11:22.000 Dude, they've grown at this setup.

01:11:23.000 Like literally if you go, you know, R. Kelly.

01:11:26.000 You say the name R. Kelly and they go, whoa.

01:11:29.000 Now, this doesn't happen at your shows, for example, when you're in San Francisco or you're in Miami.

01:11:38.000 You're talking about maybe when you get up and do a showcase set where the audience isn't there for you, right?

01:11:43.000 Well, San Francisco, you know, they're awesome.

01:11:45.000 It's such a very, you know, you figure a hypersensitive city, but the people that come out to the shows there are amazing.

01:11:50.000 They're as good as any place in the country.

01:11:52.000 I actually had seven Hells Angels come to see me in San Francisco last time I was there.

01:11:56.000 Wow.

01:11:56.000 Not the audience I was expecting, yeah.

01:11:58.000 And they walked in in the middle of my show, Caitlyn Jenner bit, and they just sat down and enjoyed it.

01:12:02.000 I thought I was about to get my teeth kicked out.

01:12:04.000 Right, but then they might add an addendum to your comedy.

01:12:06.000 You're like, no, no, no.

01:12:07.000 Let me take a look.

01:12:07.000 Yeah, that's right.

01:12:08.000 I want to kick that tranny in the teeth.

01:12:10.000 You're like, no, no, no.

01:12:11.000 That's not where we're going with this.

01:12:12.000 That's not the point I'm making.

01:12:13.000 No, no, no.

01:12:15.000 And then you're up at HuffPo the next day.

01:12:17.000 Jim Norton sides with Hell's Angels after they beat Trini at Dive Bar.

01:12:20.000 It really is funny how they just can't wait to catch you saying the wrong thing.

01:12:26.000 They just can't wait.

01:12:27.000 And I know you guys have gotten so much shit about it just because you're not, you know, beating the drum on the right side.

01:12:33.000 Rob, well, you know what?

01:12:33.000 The thing is, this is really mainly a comedy show.

01:12:36.000 We've talked about this for a long time.

01:12:37.000 I really don't like late night that much anymore.

01:12:40.000 I know you were a Jay Leno, a friend of Jay Leno's, but for me, kind of the gold standard there, Was David Letterman, obviously.

01:12:45.000 I grew up on him.

01:12:46.000 And I always felt like I was a better host than I was stand-up.

01:12:49.000 I always remember I used to watch guys like you and Nick DiPaolo and Dennis Miller and I'd feel very bad about myself because I'm like, oh man, I'll never be as good as those guys.

01:12:56.000 But there are some other things that I can do.

01:12:57.000 I really would love to host a show.

01:12:59.000 And then I realized there was an opening because everything else out there was so dyed-in-the-wool left.

01:13:03.000 Like this show is probably, would you say, 70% non-political?

01:13:07.000 It's just that it's known that our political opinions lean right.

01:13:09.000 And I know you're not a conservative, Jim, but the fact that you're just not a PC leftist, they lump you in that category often.

01:13:16.000 It is funny.

01:13:17.000 And I agree with the conservatives a lot more on speech issues.

01:13:20.000 And I never thought I'd be saying that, you know, because I felt like, hey, comedians, man, it's all liberal and it's just a free thought, but it's bulls**t. It's the conservatives who are fighting for free speech, which, you know, it is what it is.

01:13:31.000 So yeah, no, I'm not a conservative, but I agree with you guys more on speech.

01:13:35.000 Would you say that your audience has transitioned more to being more politically right-leaning?

01:13:40.000 In more ways than one.

01:13:42.000 That's your masseuse's office.

01:13:43.000 But your audience that comes to see your shows, would you say they've transitioned to being probably more right-leaning or, I guess, right-friendly than they used to be, say, eight, ten years ago?

01:13:53.000 Maybe.

01:13:53.000 It's hard to say because people who come to see me kind of know what I do at this point.

01:13:57.000 So, I mean, a lot of the ones who agree with me on speech will hate my sexuality or the way I live my life.

01:14:04.000 So I can't get any group to actually like me.

01:14:06.000 You know, half tolerate me on this side, half tolerate me on that side.

01:14:09.000 Wait, what's your sexuality?

01:14:11.000 Just liking trans women and stuff like that, which I've talked about for years.

01:14:14.000 Oh yeah, well I knew that, but I didn't really consider... That's gender, that's not sexuality.

01:14:18.000 Right there, you don't even know, you're guilty of hate speech.

01:14:20.000 There you go, I really am.

01:14:21.000 I'm minimalizing it.

01:14:22.000 Imagine that, the person who comes up to you and says that seriously, like, um, excuse me, trans is a gender issue, it has nothing to do with sex, you're like, I literally just had a happy ending by a transsexual gender, I don't know the term here!

01:14:35.000 I assume that you have.

01:14:36.000 I've read your book, so I don't think I'm letting the kid in.

01:14:37.000 Of course I have.

01:14:38.000 Nothing to do with sexuality.

01:14:39.000 Tell that to my mouth.

01:14:42.000 He'll be in the next favorite.

01:14:43.000 By the way, did you see the favorite this year?

01:14:46.000 I did not.

01:14:47.000 Oh, here's the thing.

01:14:47.000 It was very good, but we were talking about how they tried to fit in a lesbian thing.

01:14:50.000 Oh no!

01:14:50.000 Trevor Noah's on TV!

01:14:51.000 Can we bring up the audio a little bit?

01:14:52.000 Wait, hold on a second.

01:14:53.000 Are you buddies with Trevor Noah there, Jim?

01:14:55.000 I know Trevor, yeah.

01:14:55.000 I get along with him.

01:14:56.000 Alright, never mind, never mind.

01:14:57.000 We won't bring it up.

01:14:58.000 I'm not a fan.

01:14:59.000 That'd be awkward.

01:15:01.000 But the favorite was great.

01:15:02.000 It was really funny.

01:15:04.000 And they shoehorned kind of the lesbian thing in there, but it's not like they used to try and be erotic with it.

01:15:08.000 It's Emma Stone performing Cunnilingus on the Queen who has, like, seeping sores in her leg.

01:15:14.000 He's like, oh yes, that feels wondrous!

01:15:16.000 I'm like, hold on a second, here's the thing.

01:15:17.000 Are you going to call me homophobic because I don't want to see Rachel Weisz rubbing, oozing scabs as she reaches up to the disgusting, hairy snatch of the Queen?

01:15:26.000 This is the film I know.

01:15:27.000 I don't know.

01:15:28.000 Not homophobic, no.

01:15:28.000 But I think you'd be wrong to not want to see that.

01:15:32.000 Unfortunately, now no one gets to see this because it's up on the stream.

01:15:36.000 By the way, you're right that we've told people go watch the Oscars, put it side by side with us so that we don't get into a ton of trouble.

01:15:42.000 Jim Norton, alright, have you seen a lot of the films here tonight?

01:15:45.000 No, the only one I saw was, I get them because I'm in SAG, I saw Vice and of course the point of view of it was typical, but I thought Christian Bale was great, I enjoyed him in the movie.

01:15:58.000 What I found so funny about Vice, we were just talking about this, was when they try to convince us that it changed from global warming to climate change because Frank Luntz did a focus group.

01:16:07.000 That's right.

01:16:08.000 That's right.

01:16:09.000 It was conservatives who said, hey, it's getting colder now, let's change it to... But hold on a second.

01:16:13.000 No conservatives use the term climate change.

01:16:15.000 They say global warming, and the left is like, no, no, no, it's climate change because, you know, record crop yields in the Midwest.

01:16:22.000 Sorry, I'm pissed off, Jim.

01:16:23.000 I hate to be the sermonizing guy, but you know... I don't mind.

01:16:26.000 They step on our livelihood.

01:16:27.000 That's one thing... Sure.

01:16:28.000 I was talking about this.

01:16:28.000 A lot of people sort of are disconnected.

01:16:30.000 You've been doing obviously your show for a long time.

01:16:32.000 You do stand up and people watch it and because I don't want to use the term like bombastic I feel like I'm writing like we've talked about this the nasty show the just for laughs like oh Jim Norton's bombastic he's so nasty but you're you would be seen as caustic to some people they disconnect and don't realize that this is still how you make a living And that's what's happening right now with this stream.

01:16:51.000 You don't have to like it, and you don't even necessarily have to watch it, but you just don't have to prevent somebody who disagrees with you from making a living.

01:16:58.000 It would never even occur to me to do that with, say, the Young Turks or Trevor Noah.

01:17:03.000 If they used a clip, which Young Turks have, Trevor Noah has not, probably because it would help his ratings.

01:17:08.000 But I think that's where there's this disconnect.

01:17:10.000 Right, where you feel like they're taking it down because they don't like the point of view.

01:17:14.000 I mean, you're bashing them so they're going to take you down.

01:17:16.000 I mean, that's what they do, dude.

01:17:18.000 They're the worst.

01:17:19.000 I mean, I would just put it side by side and try to time code it and let people watch it and then bash it as hard as you want.

01:17:24.000 We did.

01:17:25.000 It really is awful.

01:17:26.000 It really is awful.

01:17:27.000 That's exactly what we did.

01:17:28.000 We actually had it window in window in a little window down in the corner.

01:17:32.000 And they said, they're like, well, listen, clearly we're going to hemorrhage ratings because these people would have been tuned in to Terrestrial ABC.

01:17:39.000 They would have been tuned in to WABC 5 and Schenectady.

01:17:44.000 How do they even know?

01:17:45.000 How the fuck do they know?

01:17:47.000 They have some kind of, is it like something, an algorithm or something that reads?

01:17:50.000 By the way, I know nothing about computers.

01:17:51.000 I don't know what I'm talking about.

01:17:56.000 No, it would be, here's the thing, if it's a soft strike, it's often automatic, like music, or if you're showing a clip, like we've been struck because we do a rebuttal, let's say, to, I don't know, Seth Meyers or John Oliver, whoever it is, or it could be Young Turks, but it's automatic, and then when we clarify, they fix it.

01:18:11.000 Something like this, it's a hard strike, that actually, it removes our ability to put up videos longer than 10 minutes, it removes our ability to stream, that someone, as far as I understand, at least in the past, it was always someone manually doing it.

01:18:22.000 Which, again, is what's so damning here because there are other Oscar-streaming parties going on right now, and we did it last year, but last year we didn't have the same viewership as we have now, so I don't think they had a problem with it.

01:18:33.000 So now you're probably paying for your success in a way where all of a sudden if you've got 40,000 people watching, it's a noticeable thing now.

01:18:39.000 Right.

01:18:39.000 Whereas before, it might have been under the radar.

01:18:41.000 I'd like to think that that's the case, but it could also be that we're just phoning this in and they're not happy about it.

01:18:46.000 Give me a combination of those things.

01:18:49.000 They don't have to be mutually exclusive.

01:18:50.000 It could be a combination of all.

01:18:51.000 And then they saw that you were coming up on the docket.

01:18:53.000 It was actually when we announced Jim Norton coming up next that they said, and remove.

01:18:58.000 Because he removes our transgender card.

01:19:01.000 We can't say they're transphobic.

01:19:03.000 Are they still?

01:19:03.000 Wait, hold on a second.

01:19:04.000 Because he said sexuality.

01:19:05.000 Can we say they're all transphobic?

01:19:06.000 Let's just play it safe and copyright strike.

01:19:08.000 All right.

01:19:09.000 It is at Jim Norton, Orlando Improv, March 15th through 16th.

01:19:12.000 And then San Francisco, April 4th.

01:19:14.000 5th and 6th.

01:19:14.000 Is there anything else I'm missing where people can find you there, Jim?

01:19:17.000 No, just I don't have that many gates going out.

01:19:19.000 I just got so sick of the road, so I've just been doing the radio show.

01:19:21.000 I'm just bored with my life.

01:19:24.000 Well, where can people find the radio show?

01:19:26.000 I don't have that written down here.

01:19:27.000 Jim Norton and Sam Roberts on SiriusXM.

01:19:30.000 Jim Norton and Sam Roberts.

01:19:31.000 Oh, he was trending the other day because he got into some crap for something you said about fake wrestling.

01:19:35.000 I'm like, guys, do you not understand that this is... Sorry, I don't want to... I mean, I don't know if I'm letting the cat out of the bag here, but he was commenting on a not real thing and people got really mad at him.

01:19:47.000 They really do.

01:19:48.000 Sam is like loved or hated and it's really funny for me when they hate him because like wrestling is his bread and butter that's his thing and he'll say something like that and the wrestling fans they hate him so much he trends.

01:20:00.000 That's what I saw!

01:20:01.000 By the way, tell Sam I actually think the guy is hysterical, and I think he's doing a fancam.

01:20:06.000 If you get wrestling fans mad at you, and that you're actually trending, you must be doing something right, because your job with wrestling is to push buttons.

01:20:13.000 He really is one of the best at doing it, and I know now I'll get hate mail for that, but I love it when I see him trending for that stuff.

01:20:18.000 You're absolutely right, man.

01:20:19.000 Your set looks great, by the way.

01:20:20.000 I don't know how often you've had it like this.

01:20:22.000 This looks fantastic.

01:20:23.000 You know, I don't know who wore it better, Freddie Mercury or Eddie Murphy in Raw, but I certainly don't consider myself anonymous.

01:20:23.000 I don't know.

01:20:28.000 Oh no, I was saying the whole set, like the whole background.

01:20:31.000 I mean, the Freddie Mercury outfit is phenomenal, of course.

01:20:33.000 Thank you very much, and I appreciate your dress.

01:20:35.000 Can we show him the long shot of the set, or can he see it?

01:20:37.000 He can't see the long shot, no.

01:20:38.000 He can't see the long shot.

01:20:39.000 We've got, I don't know if you saw, can he see Gerald if he's in, or can he see me?

01:20:41.000 Oh, let's not.

01:20:42.000 We got our old Oscar statue here.

01:20:42.000 Oh, hi.

01:20:44.000 This is a good first impression, right, Jim?

01:20:46.000 I can't see Gerald, I can only see you guys.

01:20:48.000 Okay, alright, well then never mind.

01:20:48.000 Oh, thank God, yes!

01:20:49.000 You can watch this stream tomorrow, God willing, if it's let back up here.

01:20:52.000 Hey, Jim Norton, I really appreciate it.

01:20:54.000 And listen, if you are doing the radio show, you can broadcast from here sometime.

01:20:57.000 We'd love to have you in studio.

01:20:59.000 I know we always have you by Skype.

01:21:00.000 I really do want to come down and do that, man.

01:21:00.000 I know.

01:21:02.000 I want to come in and see you guys.

01:21:03.000 It's just a matter of me and Sam being able to leave town at the same time, but I would love to do that.

01:21:07.000 OK, absolutely.

01:21:08.000 All right, Jim Norton, thank you so much, brother.

01:21:09.000 You must go.

01:21:10.000 We have to go back to this non-stream.

01:21:12.000 Thank you guys.

01:21:13.000 Can we just touch on one thing that he's, a specific thing he said?

01:21:16.000 Yeah.

01:21:17.000 Where he said that I'm not a conservative but I agree with you guys on free speech.

01:21:21.000 That's where the tide's turning.

01:21:22.000 Right.

01:21:23.000 Because, I mean, you know, I could disagree with you on the environment.

01:21:25.000 I could disagree with you on health care.

01:21:27.000 I could disagree with you on taxes.

01:21:28.000 We could have a respectful debate.

01:21:30.000 Oh wait, hold on a second.

01:21:31.000 Hold that thought.

01:21:32.000 Let's keep the audio really low here, and I just want, I would like to hear it though.

01:21:35.000 This is a good award.

01:21:36.000 Best supporting actor.

01:21:37.000 This is what I'm waiting for.

01:21:38.000 You know, I think they're gonna give it to Sam Elliott because he deserved it for Best Actor Hero, and he didn't get it.

01:21:44.000 Can I hear the audio a little bit from the stream?

01:21:47.000 Working on it.

01:21:51.000 There you go.

01:21:52.000 Long story short, at the end of the day, their rules are always changing, what you can and can't say.

01:21:59.000 Our rules are really simple.

01:22:00.000 Say whatever the f*** you want.

01:22:01.000 By the way, let's curb it on the cussing.

01:22:01.000 Pretty much.

01:22:03.000 I know I let it fly there, but it's good.

01:22:04.000 We don't want to give our entire team a ton of work.

01:22:08.000 I want to appreciate the fact that we're going to have a YouTube clip up, probably like 3 million clips of you ranting about how much YouTube sucks while you're dressed like Freddie Mercury.

01:22:15.000 I think you meant 3 million views, but you're drunk.

01:22:17.000 A little bit, yes.

01:22:17.000 I don't think this is going to go how they thought it was going to go.

01:22:17.000 Yes.

01:22:35.000 I don Yes, let's have someone get him a refill.

01:22:37.000 He's not drunk enough.

01:22:38.000 Don't do it.

01:22:38.000 He's from Jersey.

01:22:40.000 By the way, fantastic performance from Christian Bale.

01:22:43.000 I love Sam Rockwell.

01:22:44.000 He's one of my favorite actors.

01:22:45.000 It was not a great performance.

01:22:46.000 Sam Rockwell was one of my favorites.

01:22:46.000 Really?

01:22:48.000 Yeah, but he was not very good as George W. Bush.

01:22:50.000 He really wasn't.

01:22:51.000 I wanted to watch it, but I just couldn't.

01:22:51.000 I just have to say.

01:22:53.000 Hold on a second, let's see.

01:22:54.000 Is it Sam Elliott?

01:22:57.000 Rich Lowry!

01:22:58.000 Huh.

01:23:00.000 Wait, what's that for?

01:23:01.000 The Green Book.

01:23:02.000 Wait, how was he a supporting actor?

01:23:04.000 I need to see Green Book.

01:23:04.000 He was the star of that movie.

01:23:05.000 Green Book, by the way, for people who don't know, it was a book that had all black-owned landmarks during the time of segregation.

01:23:12.000 Oh, okay.

01:23:13.000 So I think the film was about a road trip of a man who only goes to businesses in the Green Book.

01:23:17.000 Yes.

01:23:17.000 Oh, okay.

01:23:18.000 Let's see what he does here.

01:23:18.000 Alright, so hold on.

01:23:20.000 Can you bring up the drinking game rules again there?

01:23:23.000 Hold on, let me hear.

01:23:24.000 I want to thank Dr. Shirley for just trying to capture his essence.

01:23:32.000 What?

01:23:33.000 Is he dead?

01:23:34.000 Trying to capture Dr. Shirley's essence.

01:23:36.000 Push me to my ends.

01:23:41.000 Which is a reflection of the person he was and the life that he lived.

01:23:44.000 Oh, he is dead.

01:23:45.000 He's actually a great actor.

01:23:46.000 Wait, wait, wait, who is he talking about?

01:23:48.000 By the way, for people who are saying you're really stupid, I can only hear this through a small speaker, so I didn't hear what he said.

01:23:53.000 I thought he said the name of the director of the film.

01:23:54.000 I think he's talking about the guy he was playing.

01:23:56.000 Oh, okay, alright.

01:23:57.000 For those tuning in right now, we got taken down from YouTube, so we have to be really careful about the volume with the copyright strikes.

01:24:02.000 Those on Instagram, by the way, go to Facebook, so if I say anything that's not related to what they're saying, I can't really hear it.

01:24:09.000 That's okay, keep it going.

01:24:10.000 Keep the Instagram feed going so they can head on over to Facebook.

01:24:12.000 Instagram right now, head on over to Facebook.

01:24:14.000 Hi, Instagram.

01:24:14.000 What did he just say?

01:24:16.000 No, what did he just say?

01:24:17.000 I think he gave her a shout-out.

01:24:19.000 I don't know who that was, but I think she got a shout out.

01:24:21.000 I want to dedicate this to my grandmother, who has been in my ear my entire life.

01:24:26.000 Must be really cold in that theater.

01:24:28.000 Yeah.

01:24:30.000 You know you're one of the great acceptance speechwriters in the world, Murph?

01:24:33.000 Think you can keep it down a little in there, huh?

01:24:38.000 We're the sticky nominees!

01:24:40.000 Oh my god.

01:24:41.000 The sticky winners.

01:24:42.000 Because he won.

01:24:44.000 I thank my wife and my daughter, Bari.

01:24:47.000 I thank Universal, Participant, Amblin, everyone who contributed and helped with our movie.

01:24:53.000 Again, thank you so much.

01:24:55.000 That was a really classy acceptance.

01:24:56.000 Fantastic.

01:24:57.000 One thing I've noticed for the most part when it comes to best actor, actress or best supporting, they're usually classy and appreciative because it's like a lifetime thing.

01:25:04.000 It's usually like sound editing or cinematography or like the technical award that people don't care about.

01:25:09.000 That's where they make the political statements.

01:25:10.000 I won secondary sound mixing for best short form animated documentary.

01:25:15.000 And let me just say... Love Trump's hate, I have a bumper sticker.

01:25:19.000 What were you going to say there, Brian?

01:25:20.000 Pretty much what you just said.

01:25:22.000 Orange Man Band.

01:25:23.000 No, I think you were right.

01:25:24.000 Our rules are consistent.

01:25:24.000 A good example right here.

01:25:26.000 Okay, Sam Rockwell.

01:25:27.000 One of my favorite actors.

01:25:28.000 Yes.

01:25:28.000 Alright?

01:25:29.000 I liked Vice a lot.

01:25:30.000 It was pure propaganda, but I have to say that I enjoyed it as a film.

01:25:33.000 I also enjoyed the LBJ film with Bryan Cranston that might have been last year.

01:25:36.000 We watched them on the same day to kind of contrast how they portrayed them.

01:25:39.000 That being said, Sam Rockwell did not give a great performance as George W. Bush.

01:25:44.000 Not a fan of... I think Oliver Stone did W if I'm not mistaken.

01:25:46.000 He did, yes.

01:25:47.000 Not a fan of Josh Brolin at all.

01:25:49.000 He gave a better performance as George W. Bush.

01:25:51.000 I don't have to give the award to somebody I like, just like I don't have to copyright strike someone who disagrees with me.

01:25:57.000 Exactly.

01:25:58.000 That's the consistency of everyone in this room.

01:26:00.000 You're more of a kind of a libertarian, centrist conservative.

01:26:04.000 Gerald is really more of an evangelical conservative Christian.

01:26:07.000 I'm really kind of more of a libertarian who now really likes Trump because I just like that he pisses off the right people.

01:26:13.000 The spaceman behind me is a former, he's a recovering Colombian who's also just a full-on Trump fanatic.

01:26:21.000 Straight-up mega-sexual.

01:26:22.000 Straight-up mega-sexual.

01:26:23.000 All the way.

01:26:24.000 And you know what?

01:26:26.000 Oh, by the way, I didn't tell you this!

01:26:27.000 That's one small step for this program.

01:26:29.000 I will tell you one thing.

01:26:30.000 I found out that I am 0.1% Sub-Saharan African.

01:26:31.000 Really?

01:26:32.000 Yes.

01:26:32.000 step for this program. I will tell you one thing. I found out that I am 0.1%

01:26:37.000 Sub-Saharan African. Really? Yes. Well actually it's 0.05% because my dad is 0.1%.

01:26:46.000 So I think I'm about as African as Elizabeth Warren is.

01:26:48.000 You could be white though, right?

01:26:49.000 That sub-Saharan is just south of Sahara.

01:26:52.000 Yeah, I know, but I like to think that... I didn't say black, I said African-American.

01:26:56.000 I know, but you're trying to play the card.

01:26:57.000 Well, Charlize Theron is more African-American than these people.

01:27:00.000 That's true.

01:27:01.000 Someone got mad that I tweeted out blacks, and I was like, hold on a second, not all these people are American who are nominated for awards tonight.

01:27:06.000 Yeah, that's true.

01:27:07.000 African-American, if they're black and from Britain, you dope.

01:27:10.000 It's like Jamaican Scottish.

01:27:15.000 That's been the biggest problem with social media.

01:27:18.000 No one understands what context is anymore.

01:27:21.000 Is that Laura Dern?

01:27:22.000 Yes.

01:27:23.000 She looks fantastic.

01:27:24.000 Wow.

01:27:25.000 I've never seen her look that pretty.

01:27:27.000 And by the way, I'm not saying she's not a pretty woman, but she's aging very gracefully.

01:27:30.000 And by the way, it doesn't look like she's had a lot of work done.

01:27:32.000 No.

01:27:33.000 When people think that it's a chauvinistic business, it is.

01:27:33.000 Here's something, too.

01:27:36.000 The entertainment industry is, because of the Weinsteins of the world, because of the people who you put up on these platforms.

01:27:40.000 Most Americans look at Laura Dern and say, man, you look absolutely stunning here tonight.

01:27:45.000 She's elegant, she's well put together.

01:27:46.000 The people who say, hey, you need to get some work done to your face, you're starting to look a little old, are only the people in your industry.

01:27:52.000 Yes, but see, there's the problem.

01:27:54.000 The people who say that, or the people who give them jobs, the people who say, what you just said, vote for Donald Trump.

01:28:00.000 Right, pretty much.

01:28:01.000 I think we're going to have to, I think, I know we have Anne McElhinney and then we have Gavin McInnes.

01:28:05.000 Tonight's show has just been, it's just been shot to hell.

01:28:08.000 So I think we might just have to skip Anne McElhinney right now because Gavin McInnes I know has a hard time and if we can maybe get her later on, that would work.

01:28:18.000 I'm trying to see here what we have.

01:28:20.000 We also have Cortez, but not right now.

01:28:23.000 I think we probably need to do a break before Cortez, because a lot of people haven't necessarily joined up yet.

01:28:29.000 Before we go to the break, though, the next trivia question is, does someone have this?

01:28:31.000 Again, my whole show map is completely screwed up.

01:28:35.000 I'll take it for you real quick.

01:28:36.000 What is Kamala Harris' favorite movie?

01:28:39.000 Hold on one second.

01:28:40.000 Before we go to the break, do we have some of the Yes, we're going to go to Twitter, by the way.

01:28:44.000 Promo code CrowderOscars.

01:28:45.000 You can use the hashtag CrowderAntiOscarsParty, but the promo code is CrowderOscars.

01:28:50.000 You get $20 off if you join at Mug Club.

01:28:52.000 People who are watching on Facebook, people who are watching this clip retroactively, our stream was taken down because it was probably the most popular Oscar stream going on here.

01:29:00.000 Including the Oscar stream.

01:29:01.000 Including the Oscar stream.

01:29:03.000 So let's go right now.

01:29:04.000 We have Too Cute Maddie.

01:29:06.000 By the way, Lady Gaga is just so cute, it's disgusting.

01:29:08.000 I threw up in her wig before she put it on and I dried it out.

01:29:11.000 Did you not tell her?

01:29:12.000 My voice is getting hoarse just from yelling.

01:29:14.000 I was actually disappointed she didn't wear the meat dress.

01:29:16.000 I know, well we couldn't afford it.

01:29:18.000 We don't have the budget to get her an actual meat dress.

01:29:21.000 And that's namely because Maximus the PA went to Whole Foods.

01:29:26.000 He didn't go to Walmart.

01:29:27.000 He could have done the Trader Joe's meat dress, but at that point it was too late.

01:29:31.000 By the way, also, I'm incredibly uncomfortable because, this is a true story, before we go to Twitter here.

01:29:36.000 My balls hurt.

01:29:38.000 Let me explain this.

01:29:38.000 I thought you were going to ease into that.

01:29:39.000 I am wearing, this is, okay, look at how tight these are, right?

01:29:42.000 No, it's not.

01:29:43.000 I am wearing a size 38 waist.

01:29:44.000 Let me show people this right here.

01:29:46.000 Okay?

01:29:47.000 This is a super, super, I don't know if you can see this.

01:29:49.000 This is like the pedophile subway guy commercial.

01:29:52.000 All right?

01:29:53.000 But what happened is, it was so tight on my balls because I have a huge ass.

01:29:59.000 And this is true.

01:30:00.000 Huge, huge, disproportionately large.

01:30:02.000 It's like a shelf.

01:30:03.000 And speaking of your huge ass, let's go to Too Cute Maddie.

01:30:06.000 Whoa, whoa, whoa.

01:30:07.000 Hey.

01:30:08.000 Crossing lines.

01:30:08.000 That's messed up.

01:30:09.000 What are you talking about?

01:30:10.000 How is that crossing a line?

01:30:11.000 I have no idea.

01:30:12.000 Have you not watched this show?

01:30:13.000 I'm pretty sure he's bisexual.

01:30:14.000 He can't cross lines.

01:30:15.000 I see the show most of the time.

01:30:17.000 By the way, animated feature film, Spider-Man Into the Spider-Verse 1.

01:30:20.000 Oh, really?

01:30:21.000 Yes.

01:30:21.000 I won!

01:30:22.000 Yes.

01:30:23.000 Spider-Man, you're the winner.

01:30:24.000 That was the best animated film.

01:30:25.000 You know what?

01:30:26.000 Tonight, nobody wins.

01:30:27.000 I'm the winner.

01:30:28.000 Everybody loses tonight.

01:30:29.000 What was I saying before that?

01:30:30.000 So, this is a true story.

01:30:32.000 Your balls.

01:30:32.000 Yeah, I asked actually someone to go out and get me briefs.

01:30:36.000 Because what happens is this rides up and it's like a high tension cable wire right now on my gonads.

01:30:44.000 I bet you I could hit Gaga's high note from Shallows.

01:30:46.000 You probably could.

01:30:47.000 And they were gone for three and a half hours.

01:30:50.000 Couldn't find anything.

01:30:51.000 You have the problem of them hurting, I have the problem of this hiding nothing.

01:30:55.000 I can't stand up.

01:30:55.000 Quarterback Garrett's a real trooper.

01:31:00.000 Yes.

01:31:00.000 Well, he's wearing a furry outfit, all right?

01:31:02.000 He's probably going to have a great time after this show somewhere.

01:31:04.000 He probably will, yeah.

01:31:05.000 I can't fault him for that.

01:31:06.000 That's absolutely disgusting.

01:31:08.000 I hate that we even know what a furry is.

01:31:09.000 Oh, hold on a second.

01:31:10.000 Can I hear this audio real quick?

01:31:11.000 He's pounding his fist.

01:31:12.000 This world needs you.

01:31:13.000 OK?

01:31:15.000 This world needs you.

01:31:16.000 So please, we're all counting on you.

01:31:19.000 All right, drink, because I'm pretty sure we're going to go, but we have to bring it down.

01:31:22.000 This is what I said before.

01:31:23.000 A technical award for a Spider-Man cartoon.

01:31:25.000 Yeah, we drank beer.

01:31:25.000 I liked beer.

01:31:26.000 Still like beer.

01:31:27.000 Probably had too many beers.

01:31:29.000 I thought that was him.

01:31:29.000 That's a very long drinking bell.

01:31:31.000 That's right.

01:31:31.000 I thought that was him saying it.

01:31:33.000 I did too for a second.

01:31:33.000 Really?

01:31:33.000 Just for a second.

01:31:34.000 I got confused for a second.

01:31:35.000 You'd be the whitest sounding black guy ever outside of Clarence Thomas.

01:31:38.000 I think they just turned the lights off on him and didn't let him finish.

01:31:41.000 Next guy up, no.

01:31:43.000 You went for animated film and it wasn't even an actual Marvel film.

01:31:45.000 Get off the stage.

01:31:47.000 Alright, so we're going to go right now to see, let's see, you have these, bring up The Costume Contest.

01:31:51.000 These are some nominees here tonight for Best Costume thus far.

01:31:54.000 Let's see what we got.

01:31:55.000 Who is that, Joe?

01:31:55.000 Alright, so this is... I'll be watching... I'm sorry.

01:31:58.000 This is Kara Sudahar-Bruda.

01:32:00.000 I'll be watching tonight dressed as every network late-night host.

01:32:03.000 I see what it did there.

01:32:06.000 The same late-night host who removed our stream.

01:32:08.000 That's right, those little bastards.

01:32:09.000 Oh my gosh, by the way, I look like a porcelain doll, I'm so shiny.

01:32:11.000 In case you guys couldn't tell when they removed our stream, we were panicking.

01:32:13.000 You got fired up.

01:32:14.000 They made us go, in the break, to take this, it's like a defensive driving course.

01:32:18.000 Yes.

01:32:18.000 They made us take this copyright course.

01:32:20.000 So we did that tonight, during this commercial break.

01:32:22.000 Quarterback Garrett, props to you.

01:32:23.000 He did it within four minutes, well no, the video was four minutes.

01:32:26.000 Yeah.

01:32:26.000 The video was about five minutes.

01:32:27.000 But everything else, he rattled them off, because you know, we've had this legal consultation here, like we've had Bill come in and tell them what they can and can't do.

01:32:33.000 Quarterback Garrett did it all really quickly.

01:32:34.000 He's like, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang.

01:32:35.000 I gotta watch a four minute video and click click click click click.

01:32:38.000 He was like, Chip Douglas with a remote control, and then they still wouldn't let us stream anywhere!

01:32:43.000 So I'm sitting there sweating.

01:32:44.000 Hopefully we can get this back up, but you know what?

01:32:48.000 Listen, it is what it is.

01:32:49.000 Alright, let's go to more costume contests.

01:32:52.000 Yeah, we got any more costumes coming up here?

01:32:54.000 Alright, TolarPro77.

01:32:57.000 I love all movies about the American Revolution, especially The Patriot and The Crossing.

01:33:02.000 I wasn't quite sure, because I have a really small window here, and I thought that maybe... Wait, what song is this?

01:33:08.000 No, this isn't our song.

01:33:09.000 This isn't the song, this isn't the show?

01:33:10.000 No.

01:33:11.000 Well, that's your song, because you're the Gaga fan.

01:33:12.000 Yes.

01:33:13.000 Though it was introduced by Casey Musgraves, I thought I was watching the Grammys last week.

01:33:19.000 And he also waited in line for Pitch Perfect 3.

01:33:22.000 Suddenly these tight pants got a little bit tighter!

01:33:24.000 It was just him in line.

01:33:26.000 That movie aca-sucked.

01:33:28.000 Oh my gosh.

01:33:28.000 That's not the point!

01:33:29.000 That joke.

01:33:30.000 Oh, geez.

01:33:31.000 He thinks he's saving face.

01:33:32.000 Do we have any other costumes here?

01:33:35.000 Okay, let's pick up a couple more costumes and we have some sign-ups.

01:33:37.000 Alright, this is a nice one.

01:33:40.000 That's not fair.

01:33:40.000 No, take it off.

01:33:41.000 The Kate Crusader is ready for the party!

01:33:43.000 That's not fair.

01:33:43.000 I don't like it when people use children.

01:33:45.000 No, that's perfect!

01:33:45.000 The kids could win!

01:33:46.000 That ends up being like that conservative commentator who, like, supported, uh, don't, that's okay, we don't need to talk about who it is, who supported, uh, who hated Barack Obama, then supported Ted Cruz, then said Republicans were racist, supported, uh, Bernie Sanders, and now he supports Trump.

01:33:59.000 I'm confused.

01:34:00.000 I don't like people using children as a point.

01:34:01.000 We have one more costume, I think.

01:34:03.000 One more?

01:34:03.000 No more kids.

01:34:05.000 Oh, this one's a little rough.

01:34:06.000 Is that Gavin?

01:34:07.000 Oh, this is the same family.

01:34:09.000 Wait, wait, what?

01:34:10.000 Yes, same family posted this.

01:34:11.000 Same name, Ed Cody Coons.

01:34:13.000 We've got weird fans.

01:34:14.000 A costume in honor of one of the great films that deserved to win an Oscar.

01:34:19.000 What are you talking about?

01:34:20.000 Braveheart?

01:34:20.000 Yeah, Braveheart.

01:34:21.000 Did Braveheart not win?

01:34:23.000 I thought it got Best Picture.

01:34:24.000 I think it did.

01:34:25.000 I thought it was the Rowdy Roddy Piper story.

01:34:26.000 I thought it won 5 Oscars as a matter of fact.

01:34:28.000 Maybe 6.

01:34:28.000 If you're going to protest, make sure you have it right.

01:34:32.000 We actually did have a copyright strike against us.

01:34:36.000 That actually happened.

01:34:38.000 I am protesting until they erect a statue of William Wallace.

01:34:42.000 It's right there.

01:34:45.000 Do we have any more costumes?

01:34:48.000 Maybe it was just in honor of him.

01:34:50.000 We'll show one more costume and then one more sign up and then we'll go to the break and we'll come back with Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez.

01:34:56.000 Show me one more costume there, Gerald.

01:34:58.000 One more costume.

01:34:59.000 Henry Williams here.

01:35:00.000 Best movie ever.

01:35:01.000 Hashtag FullmetalJacket.

01:35:02.000 The best 30 minutes of a movie ever is what I'll say.

01:35:04.000 Well, you know what?

01:35:04.000 Last year we had Adam Baldwin on the stream, who of course was in FullmetalJacket.

01:35:07.000 And here's the thing.

01:35:07.000 I don't really like FullmetalJacket, aside from the Lee Ernie portion.

01:35:10.000 Dude, that's the best 30 minutes.

01:35:11.000 I'm gonna cut off your ball so that you cannot infect the rest of the world!

01:35:15.000 It is one of the best first 30 minutes of any film.

01:35:18.000 And then the rest of the film isn't.

01:35:19.000 You know what else films like that?

01:35:20.000 Drive.

01:35:22.000 I didn't see it.

01:35:23.000 That was terrible.

01:35:24.000 But the intro is unbelievable.

01:35:25.000 The intro is unbelievable.

01:35:27.000 It's like the best, I don't even know if you call it a chase, but it's the best sort of, I guess, I guess it's sort of like a chase film noir because it's hiding from the cops as they go by.

01:35:36.000 It was so incredible.

01:35:38.000 And then the rest of the film was terrible.

01:35:39.000 I wouldn't say Full Metal Jacket was terrible, but the rest of Dry was terrible.

01:35:42.000 It was boring compared to the first part in Full Metal Jacket.

01:35:44.000 Yeah.

01:35:45.000 The first part was amazing.

01:35:46.000 Similar, Black Klan's been started off a lot stronger than it ended.

01:35:48.000 Alright, we also have some promos.

01:35:49.000 People who used the promo code here who joined up at MugClub.

01:35:52.000 Let's bring one up.

01:35:54.000 Boom, there we go.

01:35:55.000 Finally joined Mug Club.

01:35:56.000 It only took us being demonetized and our stream being taken down.

01:36:01.000 Let's not focus on them being late.

01:36:02.000 Let's focus that they got here.

01:36:03.000 Well, hopefully they're not late, because that seemed like a guy.

01:36:05.000 In which case, you know, we will take any trans fan.

01:36:07.000 We'll take what we can get.

01:36:08.000 Late.

01:36:09.000 Man, female, trans.

01:36:10.000 Late to the party.

01:36:11.000 Foreshadowing.

01:36:11.000 Let's go one more person who here took a leap this morning.

01:36:17.000 Jim Devers.

01:36:18.000 Is he trying to say Jim Devers?

01:36:20.000 Devers.

01:36:20.000 Devers?

01:36:21.000 I don't know.

01:36:21.000 Really enjoyed the work you guys created on his team.

01:36:23.000 He took a leap this morning.

01:36:23.000 Took a leap.

01:36:24.000 Thank you very much.

01:36:24.000 Good for him.

01:36:26.000 Again, this will probably be up the next day.

01:36:28.000 Hopefully.

01:36:28.000 We have no idea.

01:36:29.000 It's going to be a lot of work.

01:36:32.000 But this is not live on YouTube right now.

01:36:34.000 Only on Facebook.

01:36:35.000 If you're watching on Instagram, go to the Facebook page to watch the actual stream.

01:36:39.000 It's just my phone right now down there.

01:36:41.000 It's totally makeshift.

01:36:42.000 You can watch the full stream on Facebook.

01:36:43.000 I don't even think you have to be a Facebook user.

01:36:45.000 No, you can get in there.

01:36:46.000 But my grandma uses Facebook, and she says, well, I mean, she did.

01:36:50.000 She's dead.

01:36:51.000 So it's distasteful for me to say that.

01:36:52.000 That's true.

01:36:53.000 It was something I used to talk about, how she, like, you know, would hand me, like, she'd forward, you know, like, the prairie dog balls and stuff like that.

01:36:59.000 She actually had an office where she'd go, this is where I do my forwarding!

01:37:03.000 I make sure that I set my alarm, I have my Fitbit vibrate for me to wake up, and I do my- Like, it was her full-time job.

01:37:11.000 But she's dead now, so I shouldn't joke about that.

01:37:14.000 By the way, this is also distasteful, but as you well know, Hopper has lymphoma cancer.

01:37:18.000 He's actually been doing really well at responding to what we think we caught early.

01:37:20.000 But I will say this.

01:37:22.000 We wanted to cross the streams with the Daily Wire people today, and they wouldn't do it.

01:37:25.000 They never had an Oscars stream last year, so we know whose book they're tearing a page from.

01:37:31.000 And, I will say with Hopper, I did catch him drinking from the tumbler at one point.

01:37:35.000 I'm not saying there's a direct connection!

01:37:37.000 It's in the back.

01:37:38.000 I'm not saying that the, I mean factually verified asbestos, I mean we did like a 23andMe on the tumbler, right?

01:37:45.000 We took it to a third-party lab.

01:37:46.000 I'm not saying that the asbestos gave my dog Hopper, your beloved Hopper, cancer, but I am saying That the Daily Wire gave my dog cancer.

01:37:54.000 That's probably it.

01:37:55.000 No, they did.

01:37:57.000 While we're admitting things, a lot of people don't know this.

01:38:01.000 You waited in line for Pitch Perfect 2 as well?

01:38:04.000 Yeah, you know that I did.

01:38:07.000 While we're bringing up Daily Wire Secrets, I actually gave Michael Knowles his start on a podcast and I want to say to America, I'm sorry.

01:38:16.000 Oh, I see where you're going.

01:38:18.000 I don't know, I think Michael Knowles, he's a good looking chap who seems like he's pretty sharp.

01:38:22.000 He's no Andrew Glavin though.

01:38:24.000 Well, no one's Andrew Klavan.

01:38:25.000 That's true.

01:38:25.000 There's only one.

01:38:26.000 And you know what?

01:38:26.000 I know for a fact that Andrew Klavan was upset about the fact that my dog got cancer from their asbestos-laden tumbler.

01:38:34.000 Listen, don't throw the baby out with the bathwater.

01:38:36.000 There's some great people there.

01:38:37.000 Yes.

01:38:37.000 They just cut the corners in the tumblers.

01:38:39.000 Yeah, just throw out the tumbler.

01:38:40.000 Yeah.

01:38:40.000 I mean, I would love to, I would, you know, I would love to be working under the same roof with obviously Ben and Clavin and Michael and all those people there, but they do need to get their act together with the tumbler.

01:38:49.000 It's not, first off, it's not hand etched.

01:38:51.000 No, no.

01:38:51.000 It's not hand etched.

01:38:52.000 Check out this mug, this beautiful mug.

01:38:53.000 They claim it's a 20 ounce tumbler.

01:38:54.000 I think it's definitely not.

01:38:55.000 I can't pour beer in it.

01:38:57.000 And it gave my dog cancer.

01:38:58.000 Look, and it's also made out of asbestos.

01:39:00.000 I think that's a legitimate grievance.

01:39:02.000 It is a grievance, yes.

01:39:03.000 This mug guaranteed not to give any dogs cancer.

01:39:05.000 Oh, no.

01:39:06.000 Support ladder with credit.

01:39:06.000 As a matter of fact, I only have Betty drink out of this mug.

01:39:09.000 I mean, can we get a toast?

01:39:10.000 Here's to not giving dogs cancer.

01:39:11.000 Here's to not giving dogs cancer.

01:39:12.000 I'm going to toast myself with two mugs.

01:39:14.000 And by the way, thank you to all the well wishes and the thoughts and prayers with Hopper.

01:39:17.000 He's doing very well.

01:39:18.000 I wish that he hadn't gotten into the Tumblr, but you know what?

01:39:22.000 Life is as it is.

01:39:24.000 I don't even know what that means.

01:39:25.000 We're going to come back after this brief break with the answer to the trivia question is what is Kamala Harris's favorite movie?

01:39:31.000 Again, whoever gets this right or she claims to watch it every Saturday night.

01:39:35.000 Seems like it, but she would claim to watch it on Saturday before it's Saturday.

01:39:41.000 We're gonna go to a break.

01:39:41.000 We're gonna come right back.

01:39:42.000 Please let everyone know.

01:39:43.000 We need you to let everyone on social media know that this is only available on Facebook.

01:39:47.000 All right, Brodigan, just be quiet.

01:39:49.000 We'll be back.

01:39:51.000 For your consideration, for Best Actor in a Supporting Role, Adam Sandler in Armistad.

01:39:59.000 Yeah, I notice he's definitely more of a talented black guy.

01:40:08.000 Yeah, he keeps on whipping the Negro.

01:40:11.000 Would you stop with the damn whipping?!

01:40:14.000 Have we a count of the pussyhat?

01:40:25.000 We haven't made the final count, sir.

01:40:27.000 I bring a message from your master, Dianne Feinstein, Commander of Feminists.

01:40:35.000 By command of her most screeching excellency, your book deals are all but guaranteed!

01:40:41.000 Your claims will not be questioned, nor subject to criminal review, and the wonderful celebrity of being a hashtag MeToo victim is all but yours on the single condition that you identify the rapist or serial flasher as the man called Brett Kavanaugh!

01:41:01.000 I was raped by Brett Kavanaugh!

01:41:02.000 No, I was raped by Brett Kavanaugh!

01:41:04.000 No, it was me!

01:41:05.000 I was raped by Brett Kavanaugh!

01:41:07.000 No, me!

01:41:08.000 I was raped by Brett Kavanaugh!

01:41:10.000 No, I was raped by Brett Kavanaugh!

01:41:11.000 I was raped by Brett Kavanaugh!

01:41:13.000 I was raped by Brett Kavanaugh!

01:41:16.000 Brett Kavanaugh showed me his dick at a party!

01:41:18.000 It could have been someone else's dick!

01:41:21.000 I wasn't there when he raped me!

01:41:23.000 Now, when was this?

01:41:27.000 Why are you questioning survivors, brah?

01:41:29.000 Now, are you ready?

01:41:32.000 Mr. Coffee.

01:41:33.000 Can you leave the light on, boss?

01:41:35.000 I get a little scared being falsely accused of rape in the dark sometimes.

01:41:45.000 And, uh, boss man, can you tell that nigga to wet the sponge?

01:41:50.000 I could've got more.

01:41:58.000 you I could've got more.

01:42:01.000 I don't know if I just... I could've got more.

01:42:05.000 Stephen.

01:42:06.000 1,500 people will be filling the University of Michigan Power Center because of your show.

01:42:11.000 Look at them.

01:42:13.000 If I'd have gotten Hilo to Taurium, I'd throw away... so many names on a waiting list, you have no idea.

01:42:22.000 If I'd have just pushed for Hill Auditorium... The school would never let you have the Hill Auditorium because of the things you did.

01:42:27.000 I should have pushed harder.

01:42:28.000 You pushed as hard as you could.

01:42:29.000 I know, I know it's 3,900 seats, but...

01:42:32.000 Maybe if I could have shown them the overflow.

01:42:36.000 This screen.

01:42:42.000 you This view of these ten boys at their college door.

01:42:47.000 Ten more people.

01:42:49.000 It would have been ten more people.

01:42:53.000 This family, watching right now on Naroku.

01:42:58.000 Four more people.

01:43:00.000 We could've booked a second show.

01:43:03.000 We could've filmed a second show!

01:43:06.000 And I didn't!

01:43:09.000 I didn't film a second show!

01:43:11.000 I cannot continue the killing !

01:43:15.000 Subscribe for more videos!

01:43:40.000 Try the Walther.

01:43:41.000 You'll be glad you did.

01:43:43.000 All right, we are back but not really because we were banned from the YouTube.

01:44:01.000 So we're back only on Facebook.

01:44:02.000 With still more viewers than the Oscars.

01:44:04.000 What's that music they're playing?

01:44:05.000 I think we're on Facebook and maybe TALENT.

01:44:09.000 Oh, Animated Short Film.

01:44:13.000 I mean, who really even cares about the best animated film?

01:44:15.000 You know it's gonna be Pixar, unless they didn't have a film that year in their framework.

01:44:18.000 And then somebody else can finally win, yeah.

01:44:21.000 By the way, a lot of people have been asking, we're going to, can you read the trivia answer by the way?

01:44:24.000 Yeah, the trivia answer.

01:44:25.000 Kamala Harris's film that she claims she watches every Saturday night, I think I actually know this one.

01:44:29.000 Half-Baked.

01:44:32.000 That one was not our best.

01:44:33.000 Like her campaign right now, it's kind of a half-baked idea.

01:44:36.000 No, I think the joke was racial.

01:44:39.000 Oh.

01:44:39.000 Yeah.

01:44:39.000 Oh.

01:44:42.000 I thought I was just gonna tell a dad joke, and it was just gonna work like all dad jokes.

01:44:44.000 So, here's the deal right now.

01:44:45.000 Since this show has completely gone off the rails, and, um, man, look, there was already some beer in this mug.

01:44:52.000 No, no, but the thing is, it can fit more than a full beer.

01:44:52.000 Now there's more.

01:44:55.000 Oh!

01:44:56.000 Yeah.

01:44:56.000 Yes, as opposed to the asbestos-laden tumbler.

01:44:58.000 That's true.

01:44:59.000 The asbestos-laden tumbler.

01:45:00.000 You know, you're supposed to put on the illusion of drunkenness, Rodigan.

01:45:05.000 Oh my gosh.

01:45:06.000 You're the guy that goes to the office party, gets drunk, ends up naked on the table dancing, fires the next day.

01:45:09.000 You should never drink at an office party.

01:45:11.000 No, never do it.

01:45:11.000 Unless you're going to my office party.

01:45:13.000 Actually, hold on a second.

01:45:14.000 Do we have our correspondent?

01:45:16.000 We actually need to check back in right now live with our Black Panther correspondent from Wakanda.

01:45:20.000 Are you there, sir?

01:45:22.000 Welcome back, Steven!

01:45:23.000 Welcome to Wakanda, where magic and technology meet.

01:45:26.000 What does that mean?

01:45:28.000 It's still pretty uneventful.

01:45:30.000 Back to you, Steven.

01:45:30.000 Right.

01:45:31.000 Alright, we'll check back in with him later, and we'll see what... Interesting thing, Black Panther is picking up all the technical awards, which means they're gonna win none of the major awards, and everyone is racist.

01:45:40.000 I don't think Black Panther was actually nominated for Best Visual Effects.

01:45:43.000 No.

01:45:44.000 I think last year, if I'm not mistaken, it was Fish Out of Water, obviously won Best Picture, and I think was also nominated for Visual Effects.

01:45:50.000 That was what I would have given it to, would have been Visual Effects.

01:45:54.000 They had sex with a lot of fish.

01:45:56.000 I remember I was with Johnny Boy, the producer, I was in a hotel room in Los Angeles.

01:46:01.000 I had watched most of it before the Oscars.

01:46:03.000 I couldn't make it through.

01:46:04.000 This year was Roma, and last year was Fish Out of Water.

01:46:07.000 I couldn't make it through.

01:46:08.000 And I was watching Fish out of water at a hotel room in Los Angeles on HBO.

01:46:13.000 And I remember just yelling to John when he was in the shower saying, man, she really wants to have sex with this fish!

01:46:19.000 Like, it wasn't like alluding to it.

01:46:22.000 Or is it the shape of water?

01:46:23.000 Oh, did I say fish out of water?

01:46:24.000 You said the shape of water.

01:46:26.000 The shape of water.

01:46:27.000 I look at Kardashians winning an award.

01:46:29.000 So what happened was, Um, I thought it'd be like, you know, I don't know, a do not, like the lady steps into the hotel room with the fish.

01:46:36.000 Right.

01:46:36.000 And, you know, it has a do not disturb sign up there or something, you know, there's a lens filter.

01:46:40.000 No!

01:46:40.000 The fish comes into the shower, we see her full frontal nudity, his fins grow, we find out how they mate, and he starts banging Buck naked on the bathroom floor, and there's just a montage of fish sex.

01:46:51.000 Somebody describe that movie.

01:46:53.000 Best short subject, period, end of sentence.

01:46:56.000 It's a film about menstruation.

01:46:58.000 Drink.

01:46:59.000 Yeah, we have to drink a lot.

01:47:00.000 This whole speech is actually finish your drink.

01:47:02.000 Somebody was basically trying to tell me what that movie was about.

01:47:05.000 How do you feel about bestiality?

01:47:06.000 Are you asking about fish out of water?

01:47:08.000 Yeah, no, not fish out of water.

01:47:09.000 I thought you were talking about some of these women accepting the award.

01:47:11.000 Not fish out of water, the shape of water.

01:47:13.000 They were describing it to me.

01:47:14.000 You're listening to a word that I'm saying because you were incredibly offended.

01:47:17.000 I don't know, one out of ten words?

01:47:18.000 That's pretty good.

01:47:19.000 Let me hear it a little bit.

01:47:20.000 I share this award with the feminist majority.

01:47:23.000 Ah!

01:47:24.000 I'm a woman.

01:47:24.000 Hey!

01:47:27.000 I liked beer.

01:47:28.000 Still like beer.

01:47:29.000 Probably had too many beers.

01:47:30.000 Again, a technical award no one cares about, that's where the political messages come out of.

01:47:34.000 Yep.

01:47:35.000 Like, if Spike Lee wins director of the year...

01:47:38.000 Hold on, let me hear all of the...

01:47:40.000 What about teachers having sex with students?

01:47:43.000 There we go.

01:47:46.000 Oh, jeez.

01:47:48.000 If Spike Lee wins director of the year, I honestly think he's going to be humble and appreciative,

01:47:53.000 and save all the political messages for the third sound editing Academy Award.

01:47:58.000 By the way, again, for those who are watching this on YouTube, we...

01:48:01.000 We were banned today people who are watching this in post Are we what's that?

01:48:05.000 Okay, give us, tell Gavin to hold five minutes, we'll call him in five minutes here because we actually have to talk with Cortez before Gavin.

01:48:12.000 And before that, by the way, a lot of people have been asking, I have top five cigars, top five beers coming up soon here as a video in the show.

01:48:18.000 Not today, sorry, I mean later on in this program.

01:48:23.000 Think you can keep it down in there a little bit, huh?

01:48:27.000 Stop faking the moon landing!

01:48:28.000 If I had to pick one beer and one cigar for the rest of my life, because sometimes people ask me, I'm not paid by any of these people.

01:48:34.000 I don't know, we'd probably be taken down on the reg if we actually had cigars as a sponsor.

01:48:38.000 Oh yeah.

01:48:39.000 If I could only have one beer, now why did I pick this?

01:48:41.000 Before we get to Cortez.

01:48:42.000 I picked this because you need a beer and a cigar that's balanced.

01:48:46.000 So I need a beer that's affordable, a beer that has enough body, that has enough flavor that you can have in the winter, that you can have with a good meal, but also is, I think, quaffable?

01:48:54.000 Is the term?

01:48:55.000 It's quaffable.

01:48:56.000 Quaffable.

01:48:56.000 I don't know if that's a term.

01:48:57.000 I don't know.

01:48:57.000 I think it works.

01:48:58.000 Quaffable is fine.

01:49:03.000 I don't know because I've already had several of these, but my choice for the beer is Bell's Amber.

01:49:07.000 Bell's Amber out of Michigan.

01:49:08.000 It's my favorite overall beer.

01:49:09.000 It doesn't mean it's my favorite beer, but overall if I have to pick one.

01:49:13.000 And then as far as a cigar...

01:49:15.000 Brickhouse.

01:49:16.000 Just the Brickhouse Standard.

01:49:17.000 They have three cigars.

01:49:18.000 They have the Connecticut, the Standard, the Maduro.

01:49:19.000 The Brickhouse Standard.

01:49:20.000 Why?

01:49:21.000 Because it's good.

01:49:22.000 It's just in the middle.

01:49:23.000 It's great in the morning.

01:49:24.000 It's also strong enough to give you a little bit of kick if you have it later in the day.

01:49:27.000 These two pair well together.

01:49:29.000 If you're looking for a cigar that's $6, that's inexpensive but consistently rated highly, this is a fantastic cigar.

01:49:35.000 Brickhouse.

01:49:36.000 The quality is impeccable.

01:49:37.000 That's my number one beer and cigar.

01:49:37.000 Bells Amber.

01:49:39.000 Nice.

01:49:40.000 If I can only have one for the rest of my life.

01:49:42.000 Le Fin du Monde, probably, for me.

01:49:44.000 Really?

01:49:44.000 Love that beer.

01:49:45.000 I love the beer too, but if I could only have one?

01:49:48.000 Well, I love it for summer.

01:49:49.000 And I'm not going to drink a bunch of winter beers, I'm going to drink wine.

01:49:52.000 That doesn't make a lot of sense at all.

01:49:54.000 Do I get a favorite beer too?

01:49:56.000 Okay.

01:49:56.000 Yeah!

01:49:57.000 This is a Long Island beer, the Great South Bay Bourbon Barreled Scotch Ale.

01:50:02.000 Bourbon Scotch.

01:50:02.000 Oh, okay.

01:50:03.000 I think it's a horrible choice.

01:50:04.000 That's the only beer you can have?

01:50:04.000 Bourbon Barrel Scotch Ale.

01:50:05.000 You want to have that at a star barbeque?

01:50:07.000 That is my one-time favorite beer.

01:50:08.000 Well, see, if I were to pick my favorite beer, it'd be Maudit.

01:50:10.000 Maudit is amazing.

01:50:11.000 But the point is, you only had to pick one.

01:50:12.000 You guys did not understand the purpose of this segment.

01:50:14.000 I picked La Fille du Monde!

01:50:15.000 It works!

01:50:15.000 I'm going to give you some leeway because YouTube has been destroying all of your livings, by the way.

01:50:19.000 You're the first ones to get a pay cut.

01:50:20.000 I think I'm off the list first.

01:50:22.000 No, I mean, wait a second.

01:50:23.000 If we're going for the beers I can afford now, perhaps.

01:50:26.000 Let's go for the non-derailing.

01:50:28.000 We have a congresswoman.

01:50:30.000 I think we have her on.

01:50:31.000 I'm not mistaken.

01:50:32.000 I'm here to comment, actually, on the ongoings this evening.

01:50:35.000 Is one of your congressmen, congresswoman, congressperson?

01:50:38.000 Close enough.

01:50:39.000 Do we have Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez?

01:50:42.000 Okay, I'm not happy about it, Steven.

01:50:42.000 Ms.

01:50:42.000 Cortez, are you there?

01:50:47.000 Like, at all.

01:50:48.000 Not happy?

01:50:49.000 What's that?

01:50:49.000 I think that, like, the fact that we're this far into the year, we're into the ceremony at the Oscars and no one has had the bravery to stand up for it.

01:50:58.000 No.

01:50:59.000 No, to demand justice for Jussie Smollett is everything wrong with this country.

01:51:05.000 Okay, alright, but I think you need to understand.

01:51:07.000 It's everything wrong with this country!

01:51:09.000 Yeah, you know, I don't think that you actually understand with the Jussie Smollett situation.

01:51:12.000 I mean, this entire industry is turning a blind eye to, like, a hate crime.

01:51:18.000 It's not even like a hate crime.

01:51:19.000 It is a hate crime!

01:51:20.000 No, it's not.

01:51:22.000 It's total, like... It's like a hate crime!

01:51:25.000 Well, first of all, I think you're wrong about that, but I don't think you understand that with Smollett... You know what?

01:51:28.000 You're vindictive of the greater problem happening right now on this planet!

01:51:32.000 Wait, you mean lying?

01:51:33.000 Are you gonna say racism?

01:51:38.000 No, Steven, okay?

01:51:39.000 I'm, like, talking about environmental discrimination!

01:51:41.000 What?

01:51:43.000 God, Steven, open your eyes!

01:51:45.000 Open your eyes!

01:51:46.000 That's the difference between you and me, okay?

01:51:49.000 Is you walk through life with blinders on, but mine are, like, wide open.

01:51:53.000 On that, yeah, I would agree.

01:51:54.000 Wiiiiiide open.

01:51:56.000 It's like a proven fact that people of color are affected more by climate change than white males, and a portion of that... Yeah, yeah, I don't think that... Excuse me?

01:51:56.000 Right.

01:52:04.000 Excuse me, let me finish.

01:52:05.000 Don't man-terrupt.

01:52:06.000 What's man-terrupt?

01:52:07.000 It's like mansplaining, but interrupting.

01:52:09.000 It's a new thing I'm getting started.

01:52:10.000 Yeah, it's definitely not a thing.

01:52:11.000 It's not a thing, Ms.

01:52:12.000 Cortez.

01:52:12.000 Silence!

01:52:14.000 A portion of that is increased hate crimes in areas of economic disparity.

01:52:18.000 Okay, but... Because of the climate.

01:52:21.000 Because of the, let me finish... Okay, I'll let you finish, but... Changing climate, that's the key here.

01:52:27.000 I don't know what you're talking about.

01:52:28.000 That's not actually... Oh, what, because I'm a woman?

01:52:31.000 No, you're late to the party with your comments.

01:52:32.000 What was that, a period joke?

01:52:33.000 Because I said late.

01:52:34.000 Late!

01:52:36.000 Oh my God, that's not enough to man-terrupt.

01:52:38.000 Now you're mansplaining your jokes?

01:52:39.000 No, okay, here's the thing, Ms.

01:52:40.000 Cortez.

01:52:40.000 The whole story was false.

01:52:41.000 It was a hoax.

01:52:42.000 That's why we're talking about the... They're not honoring Smollett because it wasn't true.

01:52:47.000 None of it was actually accurate.

01:52:49.000 I think that's important for... No, but you know what, Steven?

01:52:50.000 That's just like... That's just your truth.

01:52:52.000 No, it's not my truth, Ms.

01:52:53.000 Cortez.

01:52:54.000 Maybe I just, like, come to a different conclusion.

01:52:54.000 It's the truth.

01:52:58.000 Okay, are you calling me... Oh.

01:53:01.000 Are you calling me stupid?

01:53:02.000 Yes.

01:53:02.000 Yes, but it's irrelevant.

01:53:04.000 The Jesse Smollett issue, Ms.

01:53:06.000 Cortez, was a lie.

01:53:07.000 And I think it's important for you... It was all made... This is the direct consequence of people not feeling heard, Steven!

01:53:13.000 And if we all listened, people wouldn't have to scream to be heard!

01:53:17.000 They wouldn't have to scream over the howls of climate change!

01:53:19.000 There are no howls of climate change.

01:53:20.000 And in 12 years, they won't be able to scream at all!

01:53:23.000 Okay, you know what?

01:53:23.000 I think we've had enough.

01:53:24.000 I think we're gonna have to let Ms.

01:53:25.000 Cortez go.

01:53:26.000 Don't you dare hang up on me because I'm a woman!

01:53:26.000 Oh, don't you dare!

01:53:29.000 Don't you dare ming up on me!

01:53:30.000 Alright, I've had enough with the man puns.

01:53:33.000 Here's what I don't get, though.

01:53:35.000 I mean, all the money she's making... A lot?

01:53:36.000 A lot.

01:53:37.000 I don't get a lot, but all the money she's making as a congresswoman now, you'd think she could afford some electrolysis.

01:53:41.000 Hold on one second.

01:53:43.000 Let me hear what he's saying.

01:53:44.000 He seems to be sermonizing here when he's doing this.

01:53:47.000 Oh no, he's just foreign.

01:53:49.000 I think we have up next, if I'm not mistaken, right?

01:53:53.000 Do we have him ready or are we gonna call?

01:53:55.000 We're gonna call him.

01:53:56.000 Here's the one thing that you need to understand with Brodigan.

01:53:59.000 While all of us are here trying to pace ourselves because the drinking game has gotten far out of control, he leaves during the break and takes a shot.

01:54:06.000 He took a shot?

01:54:07.000 I don't know what he did.

01:54:09.000 I'm pretty sure he also was snorting heroin.

01:54:12.000 You can snort heroin?

01:54:13.000 Why is the guy from Narcos on here?

01:54:15.000 He was good!

01:54:16.000 Was he in Roma?

01:54:17.000 No, he's introducing Roma, which, by the way, was a festering pile of corn-infested feces.

01:54:22.000 Anyone who says that Roma was anything other than crap is like, oh, they shot it in black and white.

01:54:26.000 There's nothing that happens, and the broad looks at the camera like 15 times.

01:54:31.000 It couldn't possibly be worse.

01:54:32.000 I think we have him live.

01:54:34.000 Gavin McInnes, are you there, sir?

01:54:36.000 I'm here.

01:54:37.000 I've got it set up a little better.

01:54:39.000 Okay, well you're live right now because this stream's gone to crap.

01:54:42.000 It's okay, it's okay.

01:54:43.000 But don't worry.

01:54:44.000 We love you, buddy.

01:54:44.000 Don't worry about it.

01:54:45.000 They banned us on YouTube with a copyright strike.

01:54:46.000 Yes.

01:54:47.000 Yeah, what happened with that?

01:54:49.000 Well, I have no idea.

01:54:50.000 Your guess is as good as mine.

01:54:51.000 But the reason they banned us was because they claim that it's a violation of copyright in that we're watching the Oscars and commentating on it.

01:54:57.000 Oh, I see.

01:54:59.000 Yeah.

01:54:59.000 And our show's better than theirs.

01:55:01.000 We would wager that it's because, you know, 40,000 people were watching and then it got shut down manually by someone who actually looked at the stream and made it a hard strike.

01:55:10.000 But, you know, we don't... We're just... It's a hunch right now, Gavin.

01:55:15.000 You know, none of this would happen in Wakanda.

01:55:18.000 In Wakanda, everything would be copyright free, everyone would agree to disagree.

01:55:25.000 Also, it's the place where magic and science meet, Gavin.

01:55:29.000 Which apparently, you could use a little bit of the Wakanda fairy dust because we can't get your video going here, but right now it's like calling into a radio station.

01:55:36.000 Have you seen any of the films up for nomination tonight, Gavin?

01:55:41.000 Uh, I think so.

01:55:43.000 Black Klansman, did you see that?

01:55:43.000 Okay.

01:55:46.000 No, I actually resent that film with unmitigated contempt.

01:55:52.000 Because they make it seem like Donald Trump and David Duke are best buds, whereas David Duke actually hates Donald Trump and calls him a Semitic shill?

01:56:01.000 Also, the guy didn't join the KKK.

01:56:05.000 He called the KKK, and then some white guy had to risk his life.

01:56:12.000 Finishing what the black guy started.

01:56:15.000 Right.

01:56:16.000 All you did was make a prank call.

01:56:20.000 And then send Adam Driver in there.

01:56:22.000 And what's so funny is when they send him in, there's this, you know, it's the kind of racist that you don't see in real life.

01:56:26.000 And he's like, Hey, you there, buddy.

01:56:29.000 Are you a Jew?

01:56:30.000 I was like, well, yeah.

01:56:31.000 What tipped you off?

01:56:32.000 It's Adam Driver.

01:56:33.000 It's the most Jewish Star Wars character let alone Darth Vader you could possibly imagine and it's just so the whole thing then they end the film by the way in case you didn't see it they actually at one point in the film Black Klansman it was actually pretty good I would say it's one of Spike Lee's better films but that's not saying much what was that film with Ed Norton was it the 11th hour the 25th hour American History X

01:56:53.000 No, no, I'm talking about you're drunk. Go home. What I'm talking about is the film with Ed Norton from Spike

01:56:58.000 It was terrible. Anyway, I haven't seen a single good Spike Lee film

01:57:01.000 Sorry, no, it wasn't no Gavin damn it brought again on a serious front

01:57:11.000 I've talked to people who saw that film and at the very end in the theater

01:57:15.000 There was they showed Charlottesville. They showed Heather Heyer being killed and

01:57:19.000 There was a real Disturbing sense of animosity between blacks and whites and

01:57:25.000 what Spike Lee Sorry, Spike Jones did

01:57:30.000 No, it is Spike Lee.

01:57:31.000 You were right the first time.

01:57:32.000 I got it right the first time.

01:57:34.000 What Spike Lee did with that film is he set us all back and he brought animosity back to the forefront of the American discourse just to make a buck.

01:57:44.000 And he's got these stupid Klansman pins on his shirt and his hat at this award ceremony.

01:57:50.000 And we had moved past that so many decades ago, and he's so happy to bring us back to that, to bring us back to the 40s.

01:57:57.000 Well, I think they don't understand, and this is what I was talking about earlier, Gavin, everyone watches this and goes, hey, all right, they're taking down the Klan.

01:58:03.000 Great.

01:58:04.000 Everyone who voted for Trump.

01:58:06.000 I can't say everyone, but most people, nearly all people, certainly people watching this program, are going, hey, great, go ahead, take down the KKK, awesome.

01:58:06.000 Great, the Klan.

01:58:13.000 In the same film, they're talking about the Black Panthers, where they're telling people to arm themselves, For the, uh, the insurrection.

01:58:19.000 Everyone's watching it going, yep, we want to do away with violence and politics.

01:58:22.000 The only person who doesn't seem to understand it is Spike Lee.

01:58:25.000 And they even say, they even, in the film, like, it's this, uh, it's this, uh, implicate, what do they say?

01:58:30.000 We all want to return America to its greatness again.

01:58:34.000 And then they end with David Duke complimenting Donald Trump, and then Donald Trump talking about Charlottesville.

01:58:41.000 I went to Twitter while I was watching the film going, David Duke is insulting Donald Trump right now!

01:58:46.000 He says he's owned by the Jews because of Jared Kushner right now!

01:58:50.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:58:51.000 David Duke.

01:58:54.000 It's amazing that, like, David Duke is so happy that he's been so successful in, you know, renting space in the left's brain.

01:59:03.000 Free of charge for so long.

01:59:05.000 He doesn't do anything.

01:59:06.000 He does Preacher Curls now.

01:59:08.000 He wrote a bunch of books about 20 years ago, and they still keep talking about him.

01:59:13.000 He covers the discourse in a ubiquitous tsunami.

01:59:18.000 That's a good point.

01:59:19.000 So we shouldn't even talk about him right now, but he does know how to get the peak to his bicep with the Preacher Curls.

01:59:23.000 I've seen that footer display picture.

01:59:25.000 Did you see The Favorite?

01:59:27.000 Did you see Stars Born?

01:59:29.000 Did you see Bohemian Rhapsody?

01:59:30.000 Have you seen any of the nominees?

01:59:32.000 I actually have my son, Johnny, watch it all.

01:59:35.000 He's going to be delivering his point.

01:59:38.000 John, what do you think about Star is Born?

01:59:40.000 Good movie, bad movie?

01:59:41.000 Wait, what?

01:59:44.000 Star is Born, what do you think?

01:59:46.000 What's Star is Born?

01:59:47.000 It's a movie.

01:59:49.000 Do you think Lady Gaga was good in it?

01:59:51.000 I didn't even see it.

01:59:51.000 No.

01:59:53.000 They're doing that right now.

01:59:54.000 What about the other guy, Bradley Cooper?

01:59:54.000 Okay.

01:59:57.000 Do you think he was good in it?

01:59:59.000 Wait, what?

02:00:00.000 Bradley Cooper, was he good?

02:00:03.000 It sounds like two drunk people at this point.

02:00:06.000 You didn't give him any of your king of beers, did you, Gavin?

02:00:09.000 One second, hold on, Gavin.

02:00:10.000 We're gonna just listen to, really quickly, Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga ripping it.

02:00:14.000 Hold on one second.

02:00:16.000 Here she comes.

02:00:18.000 Here she comes!

02:00:20.000 Is she good?

02:00:24.000 It was actually a pretty good film.

02:00:25.000 I know you're sending it.

02:00:26.000 Hold on, let's see if she hits the high note.

02:00:28.000 Hold on, turn down Gavin real quick.

02:00:30.000 Gavin, just one second.

02:00:31.000 We want to see if she gets the high note because everyone's wondering this tonight.

02:00:33.000 That comes in a little bit.

02:00:34.000 Nope.

02:00:36.000 Oh, there you go.

02:00:45.000 Here's a good example.

02:00:46.000 We just talked about this.

02:00:46.000 Let's turn down the Oscars and bring back Gavin McInnes.

02:00:49.000 I don't like McInnes.

02:00:51.000 I don't like Lady Gaga's politics.

02:00:53.000 Right.

02:00:54.000 But that is an unbelievably talented woman.

02:00:55.000 Absolutely.

02:00:56.000 She's incredibly talented.

02:00:58.000 Fantastic job.

02:00:58.000 Gavin, what are your thoughts?

02:01:01.000 Well, I'm secretly gay, so I love Lady Gaga.

02:01:05.000 Wait, I'm confused.

02:01:07.000 You don't have to be gay to appreciate she's a good singer.

02:01:07.000 Well, here's the thing.

02:01:10.000 Like, for example, I'm not gay, but if I were gay, I would acknowledge that Cher sucks.

02:01:16.000 Yeah, I... I don't know.

02:01:16.000 Yes.

02:01:20.000 I don't know what you're talking about, Steven.

02:01:22.000 Alright, okay.

02:01:22.000 I'm gonna watch Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga right now, singing this song.

02:01:27.000 I feel the same way I feel about my dog, Leroy.

02:01:29.000 Zero.

02:01:31.000 Okay, I see what he's doing there because he doesn't like dogs.

02:01:34.000 He doesn't like dogs, the Gavin McInnes.

02:01:36.000 Thank you, Gavin!

02:01:36.000 DefendGavin.com.

02:01:37.000 I don't like dogs or musicals or gays.

02:01:40.000 They don't exist to me.

02:01:43.000 Alright, DefendGavin.com.

02:01:46.000 Let's act like that interview didn't take place after, I don't know, about 14 Budweisers.

02:01:50.000 But we appreciate DefendGavin.com.

02:01:53.000 Did we lose him?

02:01:53.000 Is he gone?

02:01:54.000 He's still on.

02:01:55.000 Gavin, we gotta go, brother, because we're running late since we had to restart the stream, but thank you for making the time to get out here, and I hope you enjoy the rest of the stream.

02:02:02.000 Sorry we couldn't do video.

02:02:03.000 It's okay, we appreciate it, and you know what?

02:02:05.000 I think at this point... Can I just make one note on the performance right now?

02:02:10.000 Because, I mean, we're not listening to it, we can only go by the body language while we had Gavin on.

02:02:10.000 Yeah.

02:02:14.000 There is no way that Bradley Cooper did not break up Lady Gaga with her fiancé.

02:02:18.000 You really think so?

02:02:19.000 I'm wondering if that happened too.

02:02:20.000 I'm staring at them right now.

02:02:20.000 Seriously.

02:02:22.000 There is no way that they're not stooping right now.

02:02:24.000 You know what the sad thing is about Bradley Cooper?

02:02:26.000 He gained all that weight for American Sniper and he's never been able to lose it from his face.

02:02:29.000 What's happening right now?

02:02:31.000 It doesn't matter.

02:02:32.000 Just ignore it.

02:02:32.000 If you just ignore it for long enough, they'll go away.

02:02:34.000 Don't give them the coverage they want.

02:02:36.000 Stop ruining things, Gerald Morgan.

02:02:39.000 The issue here is Bradley Cooper gained the weight for Chris Kyle.

02:02:44.000 Would you shut up?

02:02:47.000 Could you please go back to your meth den?

02:02:51.000 You know what?

02:02:51.000 We're going to go to a break here.

02:02:52.000 Let's go to a break.

02:02:53.000 We'll come back and hopefully things will be a little better off in there.

02:02:56.000 Let's go to a break.

02:02:57.000 We'll be right back after this.

02:02:58.000 Tell everyone on social media to tune in on Facebook because they banned us from YouTube.

02:03:01.000 Go!

02:03:02.000 Quarter Black, go!

02:03:03.000 For your consideration for Best Actor in a Supporting Role, Gilbert Godfrey in 12 Years a Slave.

02:03:12.000 Holy shit!

02:03:13.000 I'm a f***ing slave!

02:03:15.000 🎵 Louder with Crowder Shop dot com

02:03:24.000 Supporting free speech since two thousand and something With people being banned from social media left and right, you can now purchase this de-platform-this limited edition LouderWithCrowderShop.com t-shirt, signifying your insubordinance to authority, and request for them to kiss your ass and lick your butt.

02:03:42.000 Plot it with PradaShop.com today!

02:03:44.000 Now then, can you identify the man who raped you?

02:03:59.000 Most certainly would!

02:04:01.000 Right yonder!

02:04:02.000 Tom, would you stand up please?

02:04:04.000 Let's have a good long look at you.

02:04:07.000 Tom, would you catch this please?

02:04:11.000 Well then.

02:04:21.000 Good enough for me.

02:04:21.000 Okay.

02:04:22.000 Probably guilty.

02:04:23.000 I rest my case.

02:04:24.000 I sentence you to... Wait, wait, Mr. Finch!

02:04:26.000 I didn't rape that girl!

02:04:27.000 Now, hold on, everyone.

02:04:27.000 I didn't!

02:04:29.000 Hold on.

02:04:30.000 Just hold on.

02:04:33.000 Are you certain this is the man who raped you?

02:04:36.000 Sure as he's black as pitch!

02:04:38.000 Well, then, that settles it.

02:04:40.000 Guilty as said.

02:04:41.000 Wait, wait, no!

02:04:42.000 Mr. Finch, no!

02:04:43.000 No, I wasn't even there that night!

02:04:45.000 My hand didn't even work, you know this!

02:04:47.000 Tom, do you mean to tell me that you're...

02:04:50.000 Questioning a survivor?

02:04:53.000 That's a bunch of pure baloney and you know it!

02:04:55.000 Don't I deserve a fair trial?

02:04:57.000 It's supposed to be innocent until proven guilty, right?

02:05:01.000 Black lives matter too now, you know?

02:05:02.000 Yes, at one moment in time that may have been true, but now we have to believe all women, period.

02:05:09.000 I'm sorry, Tom.

02:05:11.000 There's nothing I can do.

02:05:11.000 Everyone be quiet!

02:05:12.000 Mr. Finch, come back!

02:05:13.000 Don't do this to me!

02:05:15.000 Now you're saying this man raped you?

02:05:18.000 Yes, your honor!

02:05:19.000 Guilty!

02:05:19.000 You know I didn't do it!

02:05:21.000 You don't have the authority to do this!

02:05:24.000 What about jury of my peers?

02:05:26.000 I'm sorry, there's nothing I can do.

02:05:28.000 She said you did it.

02:05:29.000 Crime!

02:05:30.000 Next up!

02:05:34.000 The People vs. Clarence Thomas!

02:05:36.000 The People vs. Clarence Thomas!

02:05:49.000 Every day when you watch our YouTube feed Every video that you see

02:05:55.000 Has been demonetized just for you And I say, hey!

02:06:00.000 You two can go screw yourself today All the censorship's real gay And this next word has to be It's a simple message, and it comes from the heart.

02:06:15.000 Big Tech can hit sell.

02:06:17.000 That would be a great place to start.

02:06:20.000 And I say, hey!

02:06:22.000 You two can go screw yourself today.

02:06:25.000 All your censorship's real gay.

02:06:27.000 And this next word has to be... Go de-platform all of these... Go de-platform all of these... Hey!

02:06:36.000 SJW!

02:06:36.000 It's JW!

02:06:37.000 Hey!

02:06:38.000 Whaaaaa!

02:06:39.000 Ugh!

02:06:40.000 I just want to, you know, laugh about things every night, but...

02:06:46.000 God bless abortions and God bless America!

02:06:52.000 Aaaaaah!

02:06:53.000 Ugh!

02:06:53.000 you Bye.

02:06:58.000 Bill Cosby says that being declared a sexually violent predator is going to damage his reputation.

02:07:02.000 Not available for comment were all the women that he raped.

02:07:06.000 Ah, sh**!

02:07:07.000 Hello, this is Canada.

02:07:10.000 Dim Sum time!

02:07:14.000 It doesn't stop here.

02:07:17.000 It's a one-way.

02:07:17.000 Why? It doesn't stop.

02:07:18.000 All right, guys, welcome back.

02:07:40.000 If this couldn't be any more embarrassing from where I normally sit, Stephen thought, hey, this is going to be a great idea for me to come out here and sit and you can see me in this entire suit.

02:07:50.000 And by the way, you're lucky I have my legs crossed right now.

02:07:53.000 Let me just say that very clearly.

02:07:54.000 Why are your legs crossed?

02:07:56.000 What do you mean, why are my legs crossed?

02:07:59.000 I could sit here with my hands over specific areas of my body, but I feel like that's not a great idea.

02:07:59.000 Yeah.

02:08:04.000 That's not typically how the show goes.

02:08:05.000 By the way, I think I need to lose some weight if I'm ever gonna wear one of these again.

02:08:08.000 Like, I need to slim down just a little bit.

02:08:10.000 All I know, your legs were uncrossed before.

02:08:11.000 We literally got four me two strikes, which is funny because we...

02:08:14.000 We only have two girls working on the staff streams now.

02:08:16.000 Yeah, that's true.

02:08:17.000 I think somebody may have called the strike in from our staff because I wasn't covered up appropriately.

02:08:22.000 Wait, is that why we're banned from YouTube?

02:08:24.000 Because of your thingy down there?

02:08:24.000 Probably why.

02:08:26.000 Alright, so I just want you guys to know something.

02:08:28.000 When we first decided to do this, Steven actually had assigned costumes.

02:08:32.000 I was supposed to be in Steven's costume tonight, and he was supposed to be in this costume, which is fantastic.

02:08:37.000 Would have been great.

02:08:38.000 As I showed up, they're like, by the way, You need to go ahead and get in costume.

02:08:42.000 I said, look, it's two hours before we're going to go on.

02:08:44.000 What do you want me to get in costume for?

02:08:45.000 And they said, it's changed.

02:08:47.000 You're now the trophy.

02:08:48.000 I was like, you've got to be kidding me.

02:08:49.000 The funny thing is, I randomly bumped into him and his fiancée, who surprisingly enough is not a dude.

02:08:54.000 Yeah, she does exist.

02:08:55.000 She does exist.

02:08:56.000 She's fantastic.

02:08:57.000 At Target, and I told him, I think they settled that you're going to be Freddie Mercury and Stevie's going to be in gold.

02:09:03.000 It was supposed to be the way things happen, but anyway, like, tonight's supposed to go... He's clutching his pearls.

02:09:07.000 What is this cross thing he's clutching?

02:09:09.000 That's the way things happen.

02:09:10.000 We're supposed to be on YouTube right now.

02:09:12.000 We are supposed to be on YouTube right now.

02:09:13.000 We're on Facebook.

02:09:14.000 If you know anybody, put it out there, guys.

02:09:16.000 Hashtag crowd or anti-Oscar party.

02:09:18.000 Oh, Captain Marvel, I get it.

02:09:19.000 Captain Marvel guys coming up.

02:09:20.000 That's the white girl.

02:09:21.000 Hashtag.

02:09:21.000 I said hashtag.

02:09:23.000 I was trying to point to the hashtag.

02:09:23.000 I said the hashtag.

02:09:24.000 You gotta do it.

02:09:25.000 Hashtag Crowder Anti-Oscars Party.

02:09:29.000 Crowder Anti-Oscars Party.

02:09:30.000 Look, I think, I just have some animosity.

02:09:32.000 Before he kicks me out, before he kicks, don't, don't do it, okay?

02:09:36.000 People, people want the trophy.

02:09:37.000 They don't want you, they want the trophy.

02:09:40.000 No, you can sit here.

02:09:40.000 What's happening?

02:09:43.000 Okay, I changed my mind.

02:09:44.000 Get out.

02:09:46.000 I'm not moving now!

02:09:47.000 You can go sit in my chair.

02:09:49.000 Not gonna do it.

02:09:49.000 No.

02:09:50.000 Is this real?

02:09:50.000 Is this Peanuts?

02:09:52.000 Are you gonna move the ball on me?

02:09:53.000 Is that what's happening right now?

02:09:54.000 Hold on a second, because I actually... Hey, can I say something, by the way?

02:09:54.000 Yes.

02:09:57.000 Oh, man!

02:09:58.000 Go ahead, man.

02:09:58.000 It's your show!

02:09:59.000 This is so much more relaxing, this seat here.

02:10:01.000 It really is.

02:10:02.000 I don't have the lights.

02:10:03.000 Alright, and you're gay!

02:10:04.000 Sorry, we're gonna go back to the show that we're talking about right now.

02:10:06.000 Original screenplay, it's much more interesting.

02:10:07.000 What's the next trivia question, by the way?

02:10:09.000 Too Cute Maddie?

02:10:10.000 The next one is, uh, what is Bill and Hillary Clinton's favorite movie?

02:10:14.000 No!

02:10:14.000 I thought we were on Bernie Sanders.

02:10:16.000 I have no idea.

02:10:17.000 Again, for those who don't know, lotto.com slash Mug Club if you want to help us fight against being demonetized.

02:10:23.000 Yeah.

02:10:23.000 Uncross your legs or you'll be fired.

02:10:25.000 Okay, then I'm fired.

02:10:26.000 This is my last show.

02:10:29.000 By the way, I don't like to be vulgar with money, but we were well on our way to this being by far the most watched stream.

02:10:34.000 So everybody in here gets a $250 check just because YouTube screwed with us.

02:10:38.000 F you, YouTube!

02:10:40.000 Thank you, YouTube!

02:10:41.000 By the way, that's not being moved around from any other staffers.

02:10:44.000 That is coming directly, unlike Cortez.

02:10:46.000 It's got taxpayer dollars.

02:10:47.000 Is this the Green New Deal?

02:10:49.000 Speaking of New Deal, can someone, I don't know if we can get Maximus the PA, you guys are disgusting.

02:10:55.000 So we've had to rush to commercial breaks.

02:10:58.000 Women, did you, Abby and Too Cute Maddie, did you notice the toilet?

02:11:04.000 The splatter on there is like a crime scene.

02:11:07.000 Guys, someone clean that up, it's disgusting.

02:11:11.000 I didn't do it, it wasn't me!

02:11:12.000 Really, you didn't do it?

02:11:15.000 You've been peeing like you've had an erection for nine hours.

02:11:17.000 It's going in every which direction.

02:11:19.000 You're getting it on the painting.

02:11:20.000 You can't predict it!

02:11:21.000 It goes right, it goes left.

02:11:22.000 You're getting it on the Mohammed painting, the Bob Ross Mohammed painting.

02:11:24.000 There's a thing where it splits and it's two streams, man.

02:11:26.000 Hey, you know what?

02:11:27.000 I think I can do this here.

02:11:28.000 Before we bring up Kumia, do we have any more Twitter stuff?

02:11:33.000 By the way, my eyes look really glassy.

02:11:35.000 It's not because I've only had one and a half beers.

02:11:36.000 I was just crying a lot.

02:11:37.000 Is it just me or do I feel like this lighting is way more flattering?

02:11:39.000 Okay, let's see the winners of the by the way my eyes look really glassy

02:11:42.000 It's not because I've only had one and a half beers. I was just crying a lot. Yeah

02:11:47.000 It's stressful. It's just me or do I feel like this lighting is way more flattering

02:11:51.000 I feel like I look like I got smooth skin. It makes you look good. It makes me look well

02:11:55.000 No, it makes you look bad.

02:11:56.000 I've always been jealous of how you look.

02:11:57.000 It's because you don't have the shark hunting lights on your face.

02:12:00.000 It's method acting.

02:12:01.000 You just look like you have AIDS.

02:12:02.000 I do.

02:12:03.000 Yeah, I do look like I have AIDS.

02:12:04.000 A lot of people were confused at the Live Aid concert.

02:12:06.000 They thought it was a Live AIDS concert.

02:12:07.000 And now it's actually every other Freddie Mercury concert.

02:12:10.000 Really, the green room.

02:12:12.000 Um, okay.

02:12:13.000 Let's go to some of the best contests.

02:12:14.000 They're from Too Cute Maddie, who's so disgusting.

02:12:16.000 She makes me throw up.

02:12:17.000 And even is Lady Gaga.

02:12:17.000 She's so cute.

02:12:18.000 What is this?

02:12:19.000 That is incredibly racist.

02:12:21.000 This comes from Nkwazi, currently streaming Crowder Anti-Oscars Party from South Africa.

02:12:26.000 Oh, yes!

02:12:27.000 That's Wakanda forever.

02:12:28.000 That's pretty damn good.

02:12:29.000 Good for you.

02:12:31.000 Um, but you know what?

02:12:32.000 I'm not entirely sure if that's going to lead to another apartheid state.

02:12:35.000 Oh, yeah.

02:12:36.000 Wakanda?

02:12:37.000 No, that guy's picture.

02:12:38.000 But she's streaming from South Africa.

02:12:39.000 Wait, was that a she?

02:12:40.000 No, that wasn't a she, because there was a nipple.

02:12:42.000 Was that a woman?

02:12:42.000 What?

02:12:43.000 What?

02:12:44.000 That's a woman!

02:12:45.000 They're breasts!

02:12:46.000 Oh!

02:12:46.000 Here's the thing, I wasn't used to looking at this monitor so small, I thought I saw guy nipple.

02:12:51.000 Oh.

02:12:51.000 That's just the tank top.

02:12:52.000 Gosh, I hope not.

02:12:52.000 We're sorry.

02:12:53.000 Okay, that's just the tank top.

02:12:54.000 Alright, let's 2Q Matty, let's bring up another one.

02:12:57.000 This is Do You Like Huey Lewis and the News?

02:13:00.000 and a very creepy picture with what appears to be a non-prop knife from Bruce Dunne.

02:13:05.000 Anti-Oscars party.

02:13:06.000 You're supposed to tape over the edge, right?

02:13:08.000 I think he's been watching the wrong Christian Bale film.

02:13:08.000 Yeah, I don't know.

02:13:10.000 That one's not nominated this year.

02:13:11.000 I'm scared to turn around right now.

02:13:13.000 Let's go to the next costume here.

02:13:14.000 Let's see what we've got.

02:13:15.000 Did you not get the script?

02:13:16.000 As Crowder, in honor of it, I'm dressing up as Harvey Weinstein.

02:13:19.000 Nice.

02:13:21.000 It's just a guy with a cigar and a shirt and a tie.

02:13:23.000 That's a very lazy costume.

02:13:25.000 It looks like it's Tuesday night.

02:13:27.000 Hey, correct me if I'm mistaken, that looks, again I'm looking at a really small monitor here, looks like a Buonaventura cigar.

02:13:33.000 Oh.

02:13:34.000 Tell me what it is, I can't see from here.

02:13:35.000 If you nailed that, that's pretty impressive by the way.

02:13:36.000 Well, it has that kind of semi-box press look to it.

02:13:39.000 That's what she said.

02:13:40.000 Do we have more, Maddie, do we have costumes or do we have joint... Okay, let's bring up two more.

02:13:45.000 By the way, can we bring up the answer to the trivia?

02:13:48.000 See, the answer to the trivia is, what is Bill Clinton and Hillary's favorite film, favorite movie, which, right here, yeah, the answer?

02:13:57.000 Natural Born Killers.

02:13:58.000 Makes sense!

02:13:59.000 Natural Born Killers.

02:14:00.000 Big fans, I understand that.

02:14:01.000 Yeah, you know, they got really mad when it got a bad rap, you know, after Columbine.

02:14:04.000 That's true, yeah.

02:14:05.000 So they couldn't admit it.

02:14:06.000 But once they left office, they could say, you know, Natural Born Killers is really our speed, because, you know, Hillary Clinton killed a guy.

02:14:13.000 Also, she tried to nail someone shut in the governor's mansion.

02:14:16.000 Hold on, hold on.

02:14:17.000 Spike Lee just won an award.

02:14:20.000 Best adapted screenplay, I think.

02:14:22.000 I mean, do we have to listen to him, or can we just drink?

02:14:24.000 They awarded Black Klamzman because he's a black man, even though Spike Lee sucks.

02:14:30.000 Spike Lee really sucks.

02:14:32.000 I like his gold shoes.

02:14:34.000 I'm pretty sure he's a fag.

02:14:37.000 Um, it's just a guess.

02:14:38.000 Can you say that on stream?

02:14:39.000 I don't think we can say it.

02:14:40.000 We're gonna have to bleep that, apparently.

02:14:42.000 But I can say it because of who I am right now.

02:14:45.000 Yes, I mean, can you get heart strikes on Facebook?

02:14:47.000 Is that a thing now?

02:14:48.000 Yeah, you can just get hard, but then again, you usually take that over to Snapchat.

02:14:48.000 You can get hard.

02:14:51.000 You just get zucked, essentially.

02:14:52.000 Alright, let's see.

02:14:53.000 We have one more costume, you said there, too cute, Matty?

02:14:55.000 Let's see, next costume here is... Oh, how's this?

02:14:59.000 You know what?

02:15:00.000 Now, I assume that that Nick is a man.

02:15:00.000 Nick.

02:15:03.000 Because I've been getting the sex wrong all night.

02:15:05.000 Well, look, the Doniker is showing, so yeah, that's gotta be a guy.

02:15:08.000 Yeah, you know, he's not ashamed.

02:15:09.000 I don't know what you're hiding.

02:15:10.000 Listen, Chief, it's just...

02:15:12.000 And we have a couple of joinees.

02:15:13.000 Can we just rattle off the new joinees, by the way?

02:15:14.000 The promo code is CrowderOscars.

02:15:16.000 Look, JustRick, thank you for joining.

02:15:18.000 Just because of what ABC did to Steven and the fact that he's just effin' awesome.

02:15:22.000 And then we have a few more.

02:15:23.000 GGriffon, we have about three.

02:15:25.000 Thank you so much to people who have joined again.

02:15:27.000 This is how everyone here makes a living.

02:15:30.000 Disney's copyright strike really angered me.

02:15:31.000 I followed S. Crowder.

02:15:33.000 Here's the thing, you know, I appreciate it, but I really wish it didn't require anger for a lot of people.

02:15:37.000 We really appreciate you joining.

02:15:38.000 What I'm telling you is that if it requires anger, we'll be gone.

02:15:42.000 We'll be gone before you get mad enough.

02:15:44.000 If we have to wait until all of you get mad enough, we won't exist anymore.

02:15:47.000 The show doesn't need to stop with this infighting, and I like this person, but I don't like this person, and this isn't perfect.

02:15:52.000 Listen, do you understand the gauge of the barrel of the gun you're staring down right now?

02:15:57.000 They want to destroy all of us.

02:15:59.000 Not just us, Jim Norton, Nick DiPaolo, Anthony Comea, who will be on very soon.

02:16:04.000 These people don't care if you're right, center-right, libertarian, MAGA.

02:16:09.000 They don't care.

02:16:10.000 They want to get rid of all of you.

02:16:13.000 And we want to make sure that we're a thorn in their side, so we're still on their social media platforms.

02:16:16.000 And, you know, let's switch here, Gerald.

02:16:18.000 Let me finish this rant over there.

02:16:19.000 And three, two... Hide the junk!

02:16:23.000 Hide the junk!

02:16:23.000 While we're switching, if I can get a refill from the back?

02:16:27.000 Yeah.

02:16:28.000 Rodigan wants to get a refill from the back because it's not terrible enough if you run a blacklight over the bathroom right now.

02:16:35.000 Do you realize that everyone here could just fake yort?

02:16:38.000 They don't even need a DNA scraper.

02:16:39.000 They could just run a swab over the rim of that toilet.

02:16:45.000 That is most likely my fault.

02:16:48.000 He doesn't even remember.

02:16:51.000 On a scale from 1 to, you know, you're as drunk as ABC is angry with our numbers, how schnocker would you say you are?

02:17:01.000 Honestly, maybe a 4, but if we're keeping up the gimmicks, because I'm a drunk, he's a quarter black, he likes wine and highway rest stops, I'm about a 25 here.

02:17:12.000 I'm sensing some animosity there.

02:17:13.000 A little bit.

02:17:14.000 I mean, rest stops?

02:17:16.000 Are we gonna act as... No, I'm saying, he thinks, like, listen, we love you as a drunk, Brodigan.

02:17:20.000 Yes.

02:17:21.000 You're like, uh, what was it, what was my dad's, uh, uh, my dad's, the guy, the Irish neighbor, the old boxer, he used to pet his dog, Rebel, he'd say.

02:17:28.000 I quote this on the show, I don't love ya.

02:17:29.000 I don't love ya.

02:17:33.000 What's his name?

02:17:33.000 Was his name John Brodigan?

02:17:35.000 Hey, we actually, uh... I think, uh... We have here, uh... P.A.

02:17:39.000 Maximus.

02:17:40.000 Maximus of P.A.

02:17:41.000 Who are you wearing, uh... P.A.

02:17:44.000 Yeah, okay, that's gonna surprise me.

02:17:44.000 Maximus?

02:17:48.000 Hey, could you do me a favor, P.A.

02:17:49.000 Maximus?

02:17:49.000 Could you toss this?

02:17:51.000 And that way I can just fill this with, um... With this beer afterwards?

02:17:55.000 You can drink it!

02:17:56.000 You wanna chug it?

02:17:56.000 P.A.

02:17:57.000 Get it!

02:17:57.000 Maximus!

02:17:57.000 Look, look!

02:17:58.000 He's gonna chug the rest of my beer!

02:18:00.000 Chug!

02:18:04.000 Go, go, go, go, go, go!

02:18:08.000 It's not done until you pour this.

02:18:11.000 You have to pour my beer as well.

02:18:12.000 Oh my gosh, this is terrible.

02:18:13.000 A spoonful of hops makes the medicine go down.

02:18:17.000 By the way, you're the only one not getting the $250.

02:18:19.000 I'll give him mine.

02:18:21.000 I'll give him mine.

02:18:22.000 He has to learn.

02:18:22.000 No, don't give him yours.

02:18:23.000 He has to learn.

02:18:25.000 Oh, no, there's still the sediment.

02:18:28.000 No, actually, PA Maximus, by the way, has really helped make a lot of this happen.

02:18:31.000 We decided to reward him by humiliating him horribly.

02:18:34.000 On camera.

02:18:35.000 By the way, who played it better, Clint Howard or Maximus the PA for Susan Wojcicki?

02:18:39.000 What's your Twitter there?

02:18:42.000 Maximus, do you have a picture or are you still using my?

02:18:45.000 Can we can we turn down some of the music for cried out loud?

02:18:48.000 I don't know can we can you guys hear him in your headphones by the way?

02:18:50.000 We got nothing on okay come here Maximus come here. What were you saying?

02:18:53.000 The PA is my Twitter account and And remember, I told you the first thing, I don't want to be in a dress.

02:19:03.000 I know.

02:19:03.000 That was the first thing.

02:19:04.000 I know.

02:19:04.000 But the thing is, you're a PA.

02:19:08.000 But I'm more confused as to why you sound like Bobcat Goldwaite.

02:19:11.000 You never sound the other way.

02:19:13.000 I don't want to be in a dress!

02:19:19.000 Well, you can go slowly in the bathroom.

02:19:20.000 Just go and please rub some salt.

02:19:22.000 That's who was peeing!

02:19:24.000 Rub some salt on the rim there so nobody slips.

02:19:28.000 To answer your question, Clint Howard, I always saw Clint Howard.

02:19:31.000 Maximus actually plays a very convincing, unattractive woman.

02:19:35.000 That's a compliment.

02:19:36.000 I actually, yeah, and that's because of the Mayan heritage.

02:19:39.000 I mean, let's be honest here.

02:19:40.000 If he takes off that hat, that's a head that should be rolling down a pyramid somewhere.

02:19:44.000 Yeah.

02:19:45.000 It really should.

02:19:45.000 He was born in the right time.

02:19:46.000 That's a heart that should be taken out as a sacrifice to the sun.

02:19:49.000 Still beating, my friend.

02:19:50.000 You know, the Mayans, the Native Americans, the Landbridge theory, they're very hairless.

02:19:54.000 I've seen him without his shirt.

02:19:56.000 Naturally.

02:19:56.000 Yeah.

02:19:57.000 Mainly because that's when he was hosing down the bathroom.

02:19:59.000 I am not.

02:20:00.000 It's mainly Brodigan, but Maximus the PA also did it.

02:20:02.000 It wasn't me, I promise.

02:20:04.000 But he's been a real trooper there, Maximus the PA.

02:20:07.000 I mean, you know, we'll make sure that he's paid significantly lower than minimum wage.

02:20:11.000 Good, good, good.

02:20:12.000 Way below.

02:20:12.000 Of course.

02:20:13.000 He's basically a glorified intern.

02:20:15.000 Right.

02:20:16.000 PA means intern.

02:20:18.000 I actually think we should reduce his salary.

02:20:18.000 Yeah, you know what?

02:20:20.000 It's probably too high.

02:20:23.000 What are they doing?

02:20:23.000 They're doing an orchestra pit?

02:20:25.000 We don't need to hear this right now.

02:20:26.000 These people just are absolutely awful.

02:20:28.000 Are you happy for Spike Lee or not?

02:20:29.000 Before we get to Anthony Cumia here, I think, Garrett, do you have the best and worst movies of 2018?

02:20:35.000 I do.

02:20:38.000 Okay, so best and worst.

02:20:39.000 Did we all have our best and worst films of 2018?

02:20:41.000 I think so, yeah.

02:20:42.000 Yes, we did.

02:20:42.000 All right, Gerald, who goes first there, quarter black Garrett?

02:20:45.000 Wakanda.

02:20:45.000 We'll go with Gerald.

02:20:46.000 You gotta put it up.

02:20:48.000 I don't remember all these by heart.

02:20:49.000 So I'm the only one here who's, hold on, is that?

02:20:51.000 Oh, no wait, I was gonna say, is that Nick Cannon?

02:20:53.000 No.

02:20:54.000 But I know it's the Black Panther guy.

02:20:56.000 No, it's the Black Panther guy.

02:20:56.000 Okay, it's not all black people look alike, but does he look slightly like Nick Cannon?

02:20:59.000 A little bit, yes.

02:21:00.000 Come on, let's be honest.

02:21:01.000 It's actually down the street.

02:21:02.000 I don't confuse him with the peel from King Peel.

02:21:04.000 That's racist, but you're correct.

02:21:05.000 No, no, that's not Jordan Peele, that's Keel.

02:21:06.000 Key.

02:21:07.000 Dammit.

02:21:08.000 That is... I'm half Jordan.

02:21:11.000 How is that possible?

02:21:12.000 Your body doesn't absorb alcohol like this.

02:21:14.000 No, I'm just very tired, and the rage at ABC Disney has been consuming me.

02:21:18.000 Michael B. Jordan.

02:21:18.000 And he's sitting too close to me.

02:21:19.000 Michael B. Jordan, yes.

02:21:20.000 No, I love Broadway.

02:21:21.000 Hold on, let's see, what's this category here?

02:21:25.000 Score.

02:21:26.000 Score.

02:21:26.000 Okay.

02:21:28.000 I like movie scores, but whatever.

02:21:29.000 I mean, that's why we watch the Grammys.

02:21:31.000 There you go.

02:21:31.000 And by the way, nobody watches the Grammys.

02:21:33.000 No, no.

02:21:34.000 Even fewer people than the Oscars.

02:21:35.000 The best performance, to me, that I've ever seen from the Oscars, live music performance, I've talked about this on the show, Elliot Smith, Miss Misery.

02:21:43.000 By the way, Celine Dion did a great job.

02:21:45.000 She did My Heart Will Go On, and she's a great singer.

02:21:47.000 Don't get me wrong.

02:21:48.000 But what happened is she went out, she had all these, not pyrotechnics, but she had this wonderful stage show, and Elliot Smith goes out, it's Good Will Hunting, an original soundtrack, mostly came from Elliot Smith that year.

02:21:57.000 And he comes out, can we turn that down a little bit?

02:21:59.000 He comes out in a white, ill-fitting suit.

02:22:01.000 And it wasn't a gimmick, by the way.

02:22:03.000 It wasn't like the audio slave guy who's like, I'm gonna look tough, but not really.

02:22:06.000 And he came out and he sang Miss Misery.

02:22:08.000 If you haven't seen it, search for it on YouTube right now, because you can't watch us.

02:22:12.000 And he's singing Miss Misery.

02:22:14.000 It's this haunting, beautiful voice.

02:22:16.000 Absolutely.

02:22:17.000 And I'm not a conspiracy theorist guy, but I don't think he killed himself, but I don't think most people kill themselves by stabbing themselves twice in the chest.

02:22:23.000 Probably not.

02:22:24.000 That's iffy.

02:22:25.000 Twice in the chest, and his girlfriend was in the room when he did it, allegedly.

02:22:29.000 I mean, I don't want to do the whole Courtney Love, Kurt Cobain, but you know the Elliott Smith story.

02:22:32.000 It is fishy.

02:22:33.000 And look, that's always the thing with a lot of these performances, because they put so much production into them, when it's literally just something stripped down, it totally stands out.

02:22:42.000 Right.

02:22:42.000 Like, I mean, watching the Lady Gaga, Bradley Cooper performance, with the exception that Bradley Cooper was clearly eyestopping her, like, while she's on the piano.

02:22:50.000 A little bit.

02:22:51.000 The fact that they were just playing piano, it was probably a very moving performance.

02:22:54.000 Yeah.

02:22:54.000 Compared to the other ones.

02:22:55.000 We just couldn't show it.

02:22:56.000 Yeah.

02:22:57.000 No.

02:22:57.000 Because of YouTube's jerks.

02:22:58.000 By the way, again, bring up the stream next to us right now, because we can't show it.

02:23:02.000 Oh, is this a...

02:23:04.000 I thought we cut that.

02:23:04.000 Spot the Tranny?

02:23:08.000 Apparently it got brought back.

02:23:10.000 Are we playing Spot the Tranny?

02:23:11.000 Because that's a tranny.

02:23:12.000 He looks like Spot the Tranny had sex with Willard.

02:23:17.000 We're the Rats.

02:23:18.000 You ever see when Dirty Work, Chris Farley, was doing a Willard parody with the Skunks?

02:23:24.000 He's like, RISE MY MINIONS!

02:23:26.000 It's just Chris Farley.

02:23:27.000 Talk about a guy who was all in.

02:23:29.000 Oh yeah, every time.

02:23:31.000 That's still a funny show, Dirty Work.

02:23:32.000 Alright, let's go to the favorite movies.

02:23:33.000 Gerald, your best and worst films.

02:23:35.000 Again, I'm the only one who's seen all of the films here nominated tonight except for Green Book.

02:23:38.000 You're best and worst fiction.

02:23:39.000 Alright, you gotta bring up that overlay, guys.

02:23:40.000 I gotta see the list.

02:23:41.000 Okay, so one of the best that I liked was A Quiet Place, for sure.

02:23:44.000 I loved that movie, especially in the theaters.

02:23:46.000 Another one, um, I... No, no, that's worse.

02:23:49.000 What the hell?

02:23:50.000 That was my worst.

02:23:50.000 Ocean's 8?

02:23:51.000 Yeah, no, that was his best.

02:23:52.000 That was my worst.

02:23:53.000 Well, yeah, Ocean's 8 is his best.

02:23:55.000 No, I had it as my worst!

02:23:57.000 Well, here's the thing.

02:23:58.000 We only get one.

02:23:59.000 He's the only one that gets five.

02:24:00.000 Oh, okay, alright.

02:24:01.000 So that's my best, and then Ocean's 8 was my worst.

02:24:03.000 Okay, Ocean's 8 was your worst.

02:24:04.000 And I even saw that with my fiancée, and she didn't like it either.

02:24:07.000 Oh, good way to fit it in there, mister, wearing gold, uh, gold, gold.

02:24:10.000 He's a giant gold condom.

02:24:11.000 Less than two months, baby.

02:24:12.000 Less than two months.

02:24:14.000 I can hear Betty barking in the next room because we were doing this whole thing tonight.

02:24:18.000 Now that's the other Black Panther guy, correct?

02:24:20.000 No, that is THE Black Panther.

02:24:22.000 He's the cooler one.

02:24:23.000 So who's the other one?

02:24:24.000 Michael B. Jordan.

02:24:25.000 He was the enemy.

02:24:26.000 No, it's Michael B. Jordan.

02:24:27.000 The Black Panther's brother?

02:24:30.000 No, he was the guy that was the villain.

02:24:32.000 Listen, I know they don't look alike, but I'm confused as to who played who.

02:24:32.000 I'm so confused.

02:24:37.000 Were there two Panthers who were black?

02:24:39.000 Yes.

02:24:40.000 So I'm not wrong about that.

02:24:41.000 No, the good Black Panther is this guy.

02:24:42.000 The other guy that was trying to beat him, basically, and take his kingdom away from him.

02:24:46.000 But he was also a pan-Black Panther.

02:24:47.000 Yes, he ended up becoming one too.

02:24:48.000 So it's not racist.

02:24:48.000 Oh, okay, so good.

02:24:49.000 Okay, we were betting on your worst movie there, Broughton.

02:24:51.000 Alright, so my best movie was The Star Is Born.

02:24:54.000 Right.

02:24:54.000 My worst movie, I honestly did not see enough movies to have a worst movie, but considering I'm a huge Star Wars fan and the commercials for Solo look so bad, I didn't bother going to see it.

02:25:04.000 Can you say so bad again?

02:25:06.000 So bad.

02:25:10.000 Gosh, you used to run political campaigns?

02:25:15.000 For a job interview I'd be like, hey, how good do you think this campaign is gonna be?

02:25:19.000 It's gonna be badass.

02:25:21.000 You sound like Eric's Jewish cousin.

02:25:25.000 Again, I was running political campaigns in New York.

02:25:27.000 I actually fit in.

02:25:30.000 I can't remember what my best films were, honestly.

02:25:38.000 What was my best film?

02:25:39.000 Transformers 5.

02:25:40.000 No, stop it.

02:25:41.000 My best film was what there?

02:25:43.000 Bohemian Rhapsody.

02:25:45.000 Do I just get one good and one the worst?

02:25:47.000 So far, I mean.

02:25:48.000 That's what we have overlays for.

02:25:49.000 What did I list as the worst one?

02:25:50.000 Was it Black Panther?

02:25:51.000 Lady Gaga won.

02:25:52.000 Yeah, that was mine.

02:25:53.000 Black Panther sucks.

02:25:54.000 Lady Gaga won?

02:25:54.000 That's right, you have one too, Quarterback.

02:25:56.000 I'm sorry, I'm just really lost.

02:25:57.000 What was your best film and worst film?

02:25:58.000 Best film is Ballad of Buster Scruggs.

02:26:01.000 Anthology.

02:26:02.000 I was disappointed.

02:26:03.000 I liked the first couple of stories, but then when it got to Liam Neeson throwing the quadriplegic into the ravine.

02:26:07.000 That was probably the lowest one.

02:26:08.000 What qualifies a ravine versus a river?

02:26:11.000 Do you know?

02:26:12.000 I think it's the cliffs.

02:26:13.000 So you got cliffs on the sides, and then there's a river at the bottom.

02:26:16.000 That's a ravine.

02:26:16.000 That makes it a ravine?

02:26:17.000 It's not like, it's not about, uh, about width?

02:26:19.000 Like, there's gotta be some kind of standard to this.

02:26:22.000 Someone tweet me at S. Crowder and you'll get a free t-shirt.

02:26:25.000 How does, uh, when does a river qualify as a ravine?

02:26:28.000 Oh wait, is this Best Actress?

02:26:30.000 Or no, Best Score?

02:26:30.000 Best Score.

02:26:31.000 Still Best Score.

02:26:32.000 No, Best Original Song.

02:26:33.000 Best Original Song.

02:26:34.000 Well deserved from Lady Guest.

02:26:35.000 Yeah, that was by far the best.

02:26:36.000 Actually, can I ask you a question about Bohemian Rhapsody?

02:26:39.000 Yeah.

02:26:39.000 Were you a Queen fan?

02:26:40.000 Or like a big enough fan of the music?

02:26:42.000 I like Queen.

02:26:42.000 I mean, I wouldn't say I'm the super fan who goes, well, the best stuff is off the B-side.

02:26:45.000 I've listened to mainly the radio hits.

02:26:47.000 All right, because the thing I'm wondering, especially when biopics like that get so popular.

02:26:52.000 That's OK.

02:26:53.000 We don't need to hear her speak.

02:26:55.000 She's better singing or sometimes to look at.

02:26:57.000 I mean, I've always been a huge Queen fan, but I'm wondering how many people who weren't fans of the music at all actually enjoyed the movie.

02:27:04.000 I didn't know if he was lip-syncing.

02:27:05.000 Here's the thing, I thought that Rami Malek deserved Best Actor until I realized that he was lip-syncing.

02:27:11.000 Oh, really?

02:27:12.000 Oh yeah, he was.

02:27:12.000 That's what someone told me.

02:27:13.000 He was lip-syncing, but it wasn't actually him.

02:27:14.000 They showed it earlier in the show.

02:27:15.000 That would have been great if he wasn't.

02:27:16.000 So, I would give it to Stars Born.

02:27:18.000 I will say this.

02:27:19.000 They got it right with a lot of films, in the sense that Stars Born was a great film.

02:27:23.000 Yes.

02:27:23.000 Bohemian Rhapsody was a great film.

02:27:24.000 Definitely some of the best of the year.

02:27:25.000 The Favourite was a great film.

02:27:27.000 Really profane to people out there watching.

02:27:28.000 Except for that one scene.

02:27:29.000 But it was still a great film.

02:27:30.000 Really funny.

02:27:31.000 And I think they used GoPros in there, because they use a fisheye lens, but it clearly has a different light sensor.

02:27:35.000 Then they have Black Panther in there, and I'm just going like, listen.

02:27:39.000 Yeah.

02:27:39.000 This is the academy that ridicules and mocks Americans for liking Marvel films.

02:27:44.000 And by the way, I do too.

02:27:45.000 I don't really like the Marvel films that much.

02:27:47.000 That being said, at least I'm consistent.

02:27:48.000 They're basic.

02:27:49.000 Yeah.

02:27:49.000 Yeah, absolutely.

02:27:50.000 The issue here is they go, oh, hold on a second.

02:27:52.000 Because we've added an element to it that is black, and I'm not going to say African-American because this is just an African, it's just African-African.

02:27:58.000 Well, yeah, it's about Africa.

02:28:00.000 It's about fake Africa.

02:28:02.000 Well, that's true.

02:28:03.000 It's about Wakanda in Africa.

02:28:04.000 Wakanda forever, man.

02:28:05.000 It's about Wakanda.

02:28:07.000 When I see someone with a plasma spear on top of a Tesla, I'm sitting there going, like, what is this?

02:28:13.000 It's pure, unadulterated trash.

02:28:15.000 I could not stand the movie.

02:28:17.000 And I would say, though, that I couldn't stand a lot of the Marvel films.

02:28:21.000 I didn't like Wonder Woman.

02:28:22.000 And I would put it on par with that, but those didn't get nominated for Best Movie.

02:28:25.000 Did Wonder Woman get nominated for Best Film?

02:28:27.000 No.

02:28:28.000 No.

02:28:28.000 No way.

02:28:29.000 What are they presenting right now?

02:28:29.000 Wait, hold on a second.

02:28:34.000 What's going on there, Producer Tim?

02:28:35.000 The people who died.

02:28:37.000 People who died is what they're talking about.

02:28:38.000 Is Ruth Bader Ginsburg in there?

02:28:40.000 No.

02:28:40.000 She's not officially dead.

02:28:42.000 I'm pretty sure she's more dead than they're letting on.

02:28:45.000 That's my issue here.

02:28:47.000 If you go on Reddit or certain live streams, she may actually be dead.

02:28:51.000 By the way, we're having trouble bringing on guests?

02:28:54.000 Is that what we're hearing?

02:28:55.000 Okay, so that's okay.

02:28:56.000 Alright, so we have Anthony Cumia, and then after that, and if we don't, well then let's see what we're going to do with the rest of this program.

02:29:01.000 What else do we have to get to here?

02:29:03.000 Not much, I mean, that's another award.

02:29:05.000 We have Nick Sirse and Macalini.

02:29:06.000 We've got one more award.

02:29:07.000 Oh, we have one more award?

02:29:08.000 Yeah.

02:29:09.000 On the show?

02:29:10.000 One of our shows.

02:29:11.000 Oh, that's right.

02:29:12.000 We do have one more award.

02:29:13.000 I forgot about this.

02:29:14.000 What is this?

02:29:14.000 This is an award.

02:29:15.000 We have our Lotta Ruth Crowder Awards here, actually.

02:29:17.000 And right now, we have... Can we get a drum roll going here?

02:29:22.000 Hopper.

02:29:22.000 Oh, geez.

02:29:22.000 Hello.

02:29:23.000 You just scared the life out of me.

02:29:26.000 Okay.

02:29:26.000 Best Actress.

02:29:27.000 Lotta Ruth Crowder's Annual Awards.

02:29:28.000 Best Actress in a Leading Role.

02:29:30.000 Best Actress in a Leading Role.

02:29:35.000 Actually, I don't have it right here in the envelope.

02:29:36.000 This is actually the shtick that the actor's supposed to read.

02:29:39.000 Can someone else give me who has the envelope?

02:29:40.000 Does anyone know who the Best Actress in a Leading Role is?

02:29:43.000 I know!

02:29:43.000 Who's the Best Actress in a Leading Role?

02:29:46.000 Christine Blasey Ford!

02:29:47.000 Christine Blasey Ford!

02:29:49.000 Nice job!

02:29:50.000 Congratulations!

02:29:51.000 This is Dr. Christy Ford's first Lauderworth Crowder Award win and nomination.

02:29:51.000 Do we have that?

02:29:57.000 Though she has been nominated for several dozen acting awards in the past and has amassed several felonies.

02:30:04.000 Indelible in the hippocampus is the laughter.

02:30:09.000 The uproarious laughter.

02:30:11.000 That's bad.

02:30:12.000 By the way, let's get back to that.

02:30:13.000 Do we not get forward?

02:30:14.000 What's going on here?

02:30:15.000 We can't hear you.

02:30:15.000 Just talk into the mic.

02:30:16.000 Lean down.

02:30:17.000 That's the award.

02:30:17.000 You gotta present the award.

02:30:18.000 we not get forward what's going on here we can't we can't no what you can just

02:30:24.000 talk just talk into the mic lean down that's the award yeah you got to present

02:30:28.000 the award all right unfortunately but Reynolds was on I'm sorry could you

02:30:34.000 please shut up love you unfortunately Christine Blasey Ford is actually here

02:30:40.000 although she doesn't know how she got here what seats she's in nor can anybody

02:30:45.000 verify that she actually saw her here.

02:30:48.000 I heard she was here.

02:30:49.000 Yeah, on her behalf.

02:30:51.000 Spoons full of sugar, mixed up medicine, go down.

02:30:55.000 That's why he's still a PA.

02:30:57.000 That's gonna hurt.

02:30:59.000 Could you imagine though, we didn't want to talk about the uptalk, but the hippocampus, could you imagine if she were actually, is she a doctor of psychology?

02:31:06.000 She's not a psychiatrist, right?

02:31:07.000 Yeah, I think so.

02:31:07.000 No, I think she's a psychologist.

02:31:09.000 Psychologist is different, yeah.

02:31:10.000 I don't know if she can write prescriptions, but either way if you walk in she's like, you know, I think like Freud said, you want to have sex with your mother.

02:31:19.000 What?

02:31:20.000 Do you remember when... I think you're gay.

02:31:24.000 I really do not feel... What are you doing with the audio?

02:31:26.000 Please stop!

02:31:27.000 Come on now!

02:31:28.000 Alright, what were you about to say there, Gerald?

02:31:30.000 Sarah Palin.

02:31:31.000 Remember when she was made fun of?

02:31:32.000 Rightfully so.

02:31:33.000 She sounded a little bit like that, and so the left made fun... Fine, that's fair game.

02:31:36.000 It didn't happen at all.

02:31:37.000 No, I know.

02:31:38.000 And she was ten times worse.

02:31:40.000 She sounded functionally retarded.

02:31:41.000 Sarah Palin says he's a maverick, and she sends up that thing... Sarah Palin put it on, though, too.

02:31:45.000 It was disingenuous.

02:31:46.000 She did, she did.

02:31:46.000 I wasn't a fan of Sarah Palin.

02:31:47.000 I know you weren't a fan of that, either.

02:31:49.000 I wasn't.

02:31:49.000 I met Sarah Palin.

02:31:50.000 I like Sarah Palin.

02:31:52.000 In my personal interactions... But it should be even.

02:31:53.000 But when she did that, remember that reality show, and she's like, ah, I'm hunting.

02:31:56.000 I'm like, you clearly have never hunted a day in your life.

02:31:59.000 By the way, I didn't mean you actually had to stop speaking.

02:32:00.000 I was just joking.

02:32:01.000 Because he was trying to, you were competing over the microphone.

02:32:04.000 You never want to compete.

02:32:05.000 And you're drunk.

02:32:06.000 And you're drunk.

02:32:08.000 But we love you.

02:32:09.000 There's a lot of people that are dying here.

02:32:11.000 This is really sad.

02:32:13.000 I'm doing quite well.

02:32:14.000 I've been having a good time not watching the Oscars.

02:32:16.000 Right now let me hold on a second. I'm going through this whole show Matt because this whole thing has gone to crap

02:32:20.000 since ABC Disney banned our stream damn. We almost have Nick Searcy

02:32:25.000 we have no he's on he's on he's on all right Mr. Searcy at yes Nick Searcy you can go to Gosnell movie

02:32:30.000 comm he was in that film which will not be nominated How are you mr. Searcy?

02:32:34.000 Well our stream got taken down So we were at we were doing our stream just like last year

02:32:44.000 and that once all of a sudden we hit You know the 40,000 mark all of a sudden they hit us with a

02:32:48.000 hard copyright strike Because as you know we're clearly just pirating the Oscar

02:32:52.000 stream and not adding anything to it What are you smoking there, Nick Sirsi?

02:32:57.000 This is an Iguana Candela cigar at the Lonsdale.

02:33:01.000 It's sort of a milder cigar.

02:33:03.000 It's more of a breakfast cigar.

02:33:05.000 I just thought your white balance was off.

02:33:07.000 You know what?

02:33:08.000 I'm not a huge fan of the Candela rappers, but I know they're coming back now.

02:33:11.000 They're a bit of a trend.

02:33:13.000 I like the Candelas because they're delicate.

02:33:16.000 They're sensitive.

02:33:18.000 You know, and out here in Hollywood, that's important.

02:33:21.000 Right, yes, exactly.

02:33:22.000 But if you smoke a cigar out there in Hollywood, oh my gosh, they will excoriate you.

02:33:26.000 If you smoke a joint in their face, they'll think you're the second coming of Christ.

02:33:29.000 But smoke a cigar... Yes, cigars cause cancer!

02:33:34.000 By the way, we're not so focused on the AIDS.

02:33:36.000 We kind of celebrate it.

02:33:37.000 But the secondhand smoke, that's our primary cause right now.

02:33:42.000 That's true.

02:33:43.000 I actually went into a pot store out there for the first time since it's been legalized.

02:33:48.000 And it's pretty fascinating.

02:33:50.000 Yeah.

02:33:52.000 The most fascinating thing was that Montel Williams had his own feed.

02:33:56.000 Huh?

02:33:57.000 Really?

02:33:57.000 Montel Williams?

02:33:58.000 It's funny, he used to sell juicers.

02:34:00.000 Now he's selling bud?

02:34:02.000 Yeah, he's selling buds now.

02:34:04.000 It's pretty fascinating.

02:34:04.000 Nothing like perpetuating the original stereotype, huh there Montel?

02:34:08.000 What a jump.

02:34:09.000 I'm sorry Mr. Williams.

02:34:13.000 You know, there's going to be a story of him getting pulled over by a cop, and him telling them, like, no, this is my own weed.

02:34:20.000 Like, we know that you think it's your own weed.

02:34:21.000 Like, no, it's my own brand, officer.

02:34:24.000 Like, aren't you the guy who sold us a juicer?

02:34:26.000 You were the black Jack LaLanne, and now you're selling purple kush?

02:34:29.000 What's happening?

02:34:30.000 Nick, seriously, what is your favorite film for the year?

02:34:33.000 Have you seen most of the films nominated this year?

02:34:36.000 No.

02:34:36.000 I tend to only watch Oscar-nominated films that I actually appear in.

02:34:41.000 Right.

02:34:43.000 I didn't appear many this year.

02:34:44.000 I watched two last year.

02:34:47.000 At one.

02:34:47.000 You were nominated for two. For people who don't remember, go back and watch the last year's livestream that was not

02:34:51.000 taken down.

02:34:52.000 You were in three billboards over Ebbing, Missouri.

02:34:54.000 And, uh, you were also in, uh, I want to say Fish Out of Water. Shape of Water. I keep saying Fish Out of Water.

02:35:00.000 But, you know.

02:35:01.000 Yeah.

02:35:02.000 One.

02:35:03.000 It's true.

02:35:04.000 I think it's absolutely the best, best picture of all time because you know why.

02:35:08.000 I'm not a fan, Nick.

02:35:09.000 I thought you were good in it.

02:35:10.000 I wasn't a fan of the film.

02:35:11.000 I didn't want to say it last year because I didn't want to steal your thunder and I thought I was gonna win.

02:35:14.000 But I gotta tell ya, there was a lot of fish sex.

02:35:18.000 I don't care.

02:35:19.000 Best speaker of all time, because I was in it.

02:35:21.000 When you read the script, did everyone go like, oh, that's the scene in this one.

02:35:25.000 That's it.

02:35:25.000 Did you know when you read the script, because Guillermo del Toro, he always puts in a shockingly violent scene.

02:35:31.000 Like in Pan's Labyrinth where he breaks the bottle on the guy's orbital.

02:35:35.000 When you read the script, did everyone go like, oh that's the scene in this one. That's it. Could you tell?

02:35:40.000 It's funny that you assume that I read the script.

02:35:43.000 I didn't really...

02:35:48.000 I thought it was going to be like a Creature of the Black Lagoon movie with sex in it.

02:35:53.000 Right, yeah.

02:35:54.000 It was like the Creature of the Black Lagoon, if it were a porno.

02:35:58.000 What is your pick for best movie of the year?

02:36:01.000 E. Tom and Fay Wray got it on.

02:36:04.000 Here's the thing, it wasn't suggestive, Nick.

02:36:07.000 It wasn't like, oh, do not disturb, and there's a billowing curtain.

02:36:11.000 It's like a fish going, here's my fish dick.

02:36:16.000 Yeah, well, you know, it's the modern age.

02:36:19.000 We want to see that.

02:36:21.000 Do you like cod?

02:36:23.000 I'm more of a halibut girl.

02:36:25.000 Oh, me too, me too, me too.

02:36:29.000 Nick, Mr. Searcy.

02:36:31.000 Because we're respectful on this show.

02:36:33.000 There's no reason for it to be banned.

02:36:35.000 What's your pick for favorite film of this year?

02:36:36.000 Don't say Guys Now Movie.

02:36:37.000 GuysNowMovie.com.

02:36:38.000 We get it.

02:36:38.000 But what else?

02:36:39.000 Roma.

02:36:39.000 Oh my god!

02:36:40.000 Son of a... I just talked about how... Really?

02:36:46.000 It's gonna win.

02:36:47.000 But is it your favorite film of the year?

02:36:51.000 Of the ones that I saw, it's probably the only one that I actually see.

02:36:56.000 I did see that.

02:36:57.000 I did see Bohemian Rhapsody.

02:36:58.000 I don't think that's Best Picture.

02:36:59.000 I did see that. I did see Bohemian Rhapsody.

02:37:01.000 I don't think that's the best picture.

02:37:03.000 No, no, no. I mean, what is your favorite film of the year, though?

02:37:06.000 We now know what you think will win, but what was your favorite movie of this year?

02:37:09.000 It couldn't be Roma. Please don't tell me it was Roma.

02:37:12.000 You know, I've got to say, I like that Molly McCarthy movie.

02:37:16.000 The one about the...

02:37:19.000 I can't remember the name of it.

02:37:20.000 Oh, oh, can you ever forgive me?

02:37:21.000 Yeah, I love that movie.

02:37:23.000 I thought it was really good.

02:37:24.000 Melissa McCarthy, but apparently to Nick, seriously, all white women look the same.

02:37:27.000 I did like her.

02:37:29.000 Really?

02:37:30.000 What did you like?

02:37:30.000 I usually think, I don't understand.

02:37:31.000 What did you like about Roma?

02:37:32.000 I don't get it.

02:37:33.000 Nothing happens, and she looks at the camera like nine times.

02:37:35.000 She's like, adonde esta?

02:37:38.000 Adonde esta Sony FS7?

02:37:41.000 No me gusta.

02:37:43.000 I like the way Roma shot.

02:37:45.000 And it's like, I think with Roma, You have to watch it at the right time.

02:37:50.000 You need to watch it right after you get coffee at night.

02:37:54.000 Or weed.

02:37:55.000 If you kind of get used to the pace of it, it's beautifully done.

02:37:59.000 I mean, that last shot where she goes into the ocean and saves the kids, that's an amazing shot.

02:38:07.000 And it's one long five-minute film.

02:38:10.000 Hold on a second. Hey, Sound Engineer Abbott, can you bring down the Oscar audio completely?

02:38:14.000 Because I can't really hear Nick.

02:38:15.000 I disagree with you, Mr. Searcy.

02:38:17.000 I loathe the film.

02:38:19.000 And it's the only film that I couldn't make it through, so I honestly didn't see that last shot.

02:38:23.000 Well, see, then you don't know what you're talking about.

02:38:26.000 That's true. That's fair.

02:38:27.000 But there's one person here who's seen all of the films with the exception of Green Book.

02:38:31.000 And that's just because... You know what it was with Green Book?

02:38:33.000 I didn't get the screener, I know you get the screeners too, so I watched all of them because I'm doing this this stream obviously and Roma was on Netflix, but Green Book was only available to buy and I didn't, I have no idea, I have not seen the film, But I didn't want to get, you know, sort of swindled.

02:38:48.000 I didn't want to pay money and find out that it was this leftist sort of, you know, screed of a script.

02:38:54.000 So I wasn't willing to take the chance, just like, I need to see all the Michael Moore films, but I pay for another ticket and sneak in illegally.

02:39:00.000 Right, right.

02:39:04.000 I didn't see Green Book.

02:39:05.000 Yeah, but I saw all the others.

02:39:06.000 A Star is Born was great.

02:39:09.000 The Favorite was great.

02:39:09.000 I just, I don't get... Yeah, The Favorite was good, yes.

02:39:13.000 It was, but it was really disgusting as well.

02:39:15.000 I mean, when she's going down on the Queen with the sores, the open wounds on her leg, I'm sitting there watching this going like, this is a really disgusting scene.

02:39:23.000 I know I'm homophobic for saying it, but I'm not, you know, I thought it was gross.

02:39:28.000 That was my favorite.

02:39:29.000 I can imagine.

02:39:30.000 You and Jim Norton.

02:39:31.000 Go on!

02:39:33.000 All right.

02:39:33.000 And then what was your least favorite film of the year there, Nick Sierci?

02:39:37.000 Oh, gosh.

02:39:37.000 Well, I don't know.

02:39:38.000 I don't really watch that many movies anymore.

02:39:42.000 I mostly watch documentaries, you know, because so much of it is predictable.

02:39:48.000 And half the time I watch a movie, I go, they cast that guy.

02:39:52.000 Why were they cheering Barbra Streisand?

02:39:56.000 Can someone tweet me and let me know?

02:39:59.000 That's Spike Lee cheering Barbra Streisand.

02:40:01.000 Okay, drink, drink, sorry.

02:40:02.000 Hold on, let's grab this audio real quick.

02:40:04.000 Nick, seriously, hold on one second.

02:40:05.000 Why were they cheering Barbra Streisand?

02:40:07.000 Can someone tweet me and let me know?

02:40:09.000 Spike Lee cheering Barbra Streisand, every time that happens, an angel gets its wings clipped.

02:40:14.000 Spike Lee will...

02:40:16.000 Yeah.

02:40:18.000 Yeah, I think there's a little melanin factor there.

02:40:20.000 A little bit.

02:40:21.000 And he didn't win.

02:40:22.000 First time.

02:40:23.000 You know what?

02:40:24.000 I hope he wins.

02:40:25.000 Because I do like Spike Lee.

02:40:28.000 I couldn't disagree with him more.

02:40:29.000 You're almost like John Nolte.

02:40:30.000 I think you're almost always wrong on your picks.

02:40:33.000 Name me a good Spike Lee film.

02:40:35.000 But I'm a professional, Steven.

02:40:39.000 I know what I'm talking about.

02:40:41.000 What's your favorite Spike Lee film?

02:40:44.000 I would go and do the right thing.

02:40:46.000 Oh, you basic b**ch!

02:40:48.000 You basic vanilla pumpkin spice latte b**ch!

02:40:52.000 I do like Summer of Sam.

02:40:53.000 I do like Summer of Sam.

02:40:55.000 But I'll tell you, in a nutshell, this is why I like Spike Lee films.

02:40:58.000 It's because they're idiosyncratic because nobody can tell him what to do.

02:41:02.000 He does whatever he wants.

02:41:03.000 So when you see a Spike Lee movie, you're getting one person's vision.

02:41:07.000 You're not getting a studio-created thing.

02:41:14.000 But was the film the 11th hour or the 25th hour, the Spike Lee film with Ed Norton?

02:41:18.000 You know the film I'm talking about?

02:41:21.000 I think it was 25th hour, but did you ever hear the story about that?

02:41:26.000 You know, Ed Norton is not particularly easy to work with, and he wanted to direct a specific scene.

02:41:30.000 Have you heard this story?

02:41:32.000 No.

02:41:32.000 I think that this is from the 25th hour.

02:41:34.000 I could be mistaken, but this is a notorious Edward Norton story.

02:41:37.000 He was like, I want to direct this scene.

02:41:39.000 I want it to happen this way.

02:41:40.000 And so they said, all right, he's not going to stop until he gets it his way.

02:41:43.000 So they let him direct the whole scene.

02:41:45.000 And Spike Lee didn't put film in the camera.

02:41:49.000 I can respect that.

02:41:50.000 That's awesome.

02:41:52.000 He does it his way, and that's... Whether you like it or not, at least it's his vision.

02:41:57.000 No, I appreciate that.

02:41:58.000 I just think that his vision sucks.

02:42:00.000 All right, it is at, yes, Nick Searcy, GosnellMovie.com, and that's available, of course, on Amazon right now.

02:42:06.000 You can go get it.

02:42:07.000 Yeah, Nick, what were you gonna say?

02:42:08.000 I wanna say one more thing.

02:42:09.000 You know, instead of watching Oscars every year, I always just go on Team America.

02:42:17.000 Except last year, because, you know, you're a self-gratifying pumpkin spice latte-drinking basic bitch.

02:42:23.000 But they didn't even invite me, so I don't care.

02:42:26.000 I can't figure it out, can you?

02:42:27.000 I have no idea.

02:42:27.000 Before you get rid of me, I gotta show you one thing about how I feel about the Oscars.

02:42:31.000 Can I do that?

02:42:31.000 I have no idea.

02:42:33.000 You know, I don't want to play the race card, but I'm pretty sure it's because you're a diverse adoptive father.

02:42:39.000 I want to show you, before you get rid of me, I've got to show you one thing about how I feel about the Oscars.

02:42:45.000 Can I do that?

02:42:47.000 It depends. We've already been banned from YouTube and I don't...

02:42:49.000 Okay, alright, that's fair.

02:42:53.000 This is what I think about the Oscars.

02:42:55.000 Did you have this queued up, Nick?

02:42:58.000 Oh wow!

02:42:59.000 Oh my gosh!

02:43:00.000 Well played.

02:43:02.000 Nick Searcy is my favorite actor of all time.

02:43:05.000 Don't watch the Oscars, watch this.

02:43:08.000 By the way, right now Willem Dafoe is on screen with a Russian fur hat and a bandage, like a Civil War bandage, and he looks creepier than Team America.

02:43:18.000 A little bit.

02:43:18.000 I will say that.

02:43:19.000 Yes, Nick Searcy on the Twitter.

02:43:20.000 Thank you so much for joining us, sir.

02:43:22.000 I appreciate it.

02:43:22.000 Enjoy your Team America film.

02:43:24.000 You know who gave Willem Dafoe that hat, don't you?

02:43:27.000 Putin!

02:43:28.000 Vladimir Putin!

02:43:30.000 All right, I see what you did there.

02:43:31.000 I don't agree with you.

02:43:32.000 I think that's another... I think you got that one wrong.

02:43:34.000 Nick, seriously, you must go.

02:43:35.000 Thank you, sir.

02:43:36.000 We appreciate it.

02:43:36.000 Of course, it's GosnellMovie.com.

02:43:39.000 Yes.

02:43:39.000 Oh, hold on a second.

02:43:41.000 What is this, Best Actor?

02:43:42.000 Best Actor, yeah.

02:43:42.000 All right, let's watch this a little bit.

02:43:44.000 We have to watch a little bit.

02:43:44.000 Okay, call it.

02:43:45.000 Who wins?

02:43:47.000 That guy.

02:43:47.000 I forgot his name.

02:43:48.000 I call Remy Malek.

02:43:50.000 Everyone here seems to think it's Rami Malek.

02:43:52.000 I don't think it's Rami.

02:43:53.000 I think it's Bradley Cooper.

02:43:54.000 It's Rami.

02:43:55.000 Bradley Cooper.

02:43:56.000 By the way, he's American.

02:43:57.000 Did you know that?

02:43:57.000 Really?

02:43:58.000 A lot of people thought he was British.

02:44:01.000 You think it's Bradley Cooper?

02:44:02.000 I think it's Bradley Cooper.

02:44:03.000 I do not think it's Bradley Cooper.

02:44:04.000 I don't think he'll win, but I think he probably deserves it.

02:44:05.000 I'm going Rami.

02:44:06.000 We're not asking who you think deserves it.

02:44:08.000 This is about betting on who you think will win.

02:44:10.000 Oh, if I had to place money on it?

02:44:11.000 Rami.

02:44:13.000 Hey, isn't that the guy who said the N-word and then everyone got really mad at him when he was saying, like, you know, for example, we shouldn't say the N-word anymore.

02:44:18.000 Yes.

02:44:19.000 And they just clipped it?

02:44:20.000 I'm trying to burp off camera here.

02:44:21.000 Alright, hold on, let's see.

02:44:22.000 Who wins?

02:44:23.000 We all think Rami.

02:44:24.000 Oh, Gary Oldman, one of the best actors ever, also conservative.

02:44:28.000 Ah, yes.

02:44:29.000 Who knew?

02:44:30.000 Alright, there is some justice.

02:44:33.000 Look at him.

02:44:33.000 Good for him.

02:44:34.000 Hey, that's a far cry from Freddie Mercury.

02:44:37.000 He's like, trust me guys, I'm straight.

02:44:38.000 And that's the actress who played Freddie Mercury's beard.

02:44:42.000 I just played a gay guy.

02:44:43.000 Oh, is that the actress who played Freddie Mercury?

02:44:45.000 That's the actress from the film?

02:44:46.000 That's not his wife?

02:44:46.000 I can't see.

02:44:48.000 I don't know if it's his wife or not, but she definitely looks like the actress who played the beard.

02:44:52.000 Microphone, Brodigan.

02:44:53.000 You gotta get that mic back, buddy.

02:44:55.000 Good lord.

02:44:56.000 He's gonna say a scale from a scale from one to ten.

02:44:59.000 I'm only about a four by the way What's what's a microphone?

02:45:02.000 I don't know why you sound like Tony Clifton.

02:45:04.000 I was about to say Tony Clifton.

02:45:06.000 That's nice.

02:45:16.000 I like this guy.

02:45:18.000 So she might have been a beard.

02:45:20.000 I'm not gay.

02:45:21.000 This is a very nice speech.

02:45:21.000 see me do anything.

02:45:23.000 He's not, but I think he's looking down on me right now.

02:45:27.000 So this is a very nice speech.

02:45:32.000 Yes.

02:45:32.000 Yeah.

02:45:33.000 One, I'm so appreciative to all of you, to everyone who has had a hand in getting me here

02:45:41.000 to the Academy.

02:45:42.000 Because he just talked about his deceased father, I'm not going to make a joke about giving me a hand at the Oscars.

02:45:47.000 No.

02:45:47.000 You're going to give him a pass.

02:45:47.000 It's rife with Weinstein material.

02:45:50.000 Yes.

02:45:51.000 If he does it again, though.

02:45:52.000 He gets a pass.

02:45:53.000 One more.

02:45:55.000 Look, Adam Lambert, he's like, are we sure he's not one of us?

02:45:59.000 Did we miscast him?

02:46:00.000 Crossing my fingers.

02:46:03.000 Thank you, Queen.

02:46:04.000 Thank you, guys, for being... Thank you, Queen.

02:46:08.000 That guy has the wig like the Queen.

02:46:12.000 That's his actual hair.

02:46:12.000 I know.

02:46:14.000 Him and Howard Stern are the only guys his age who have that actual hair.

02:46:16.000 It's remarkable.

02:46:17.000 Yeah.

02:46:18.000 It's an anti-Semite's worst nightmare.

02:46:22.000 See the hair coming a mile away.

02:46:25.000 And my cast, I love you.

02:46:27.000 You are my equals, you are my betters.

02:46:31.000 I could have never been here without you.

02:46:33.000 They're saying, well if I'm your equal, why didn't I get an award?

02:46:35.000 I didn't get paid like your equal.

02:46:36.000 What the hell happened?

02:46:37.000 What went wrong?

02:46:38.000 I'm looking for my trophy.

02:46:39.000 What it would have been like to tell little Bubba Rami that one day this might happen to him, and I think his curly-haired little mind would be blown.

02:46:51.000 You're gonna let that one go, Steven?

02:46:54.000 I'm gonna let all of us go because this guy is being a class act right now and I think we need more folks like him.

02:46:59.000 Yeah, it's true.

02:47:00.000 He's actually humbled.

02:47:01.000 Uh, drink!

02:47:02.000 See, I told you!

02:47:03.000 Son of a gun!

02:47:05.000 An immigrant who's...

02:47:07.000 Uh, drink!

02:47:07.000 No, see I told you!

02:47:09.000 Son of a gun!

02:47:10.000 ...apologize for himself.

02:47:11.000 Oh shoot, I just spilled it all over my show mat.

02:47:13.000 ...celebrating him...

02:47:15.000 And this story with you tonight is proof that we're longing for stories like this.

02:47:22.000 Drink.

02:47:23.000 I have nothing left but.

02:47:24.000 Immigrants from Egypt, I'm a first generation.

02:47:28.000 Immigrant again, son of a gun.

02:47:29.000 Maximus the PA, you need to bring in Brodigan some more beer.

02:47:32.000 Ready the Uber.

02:47:34.000 This is why I Ubered.

02:47:39.000 Also the DUI.

02:47:40.000 That too?

02:47:47.000 What are you looking for there?

02:47:48.000 What do you want in there?

02:47:49.000 Whatever they bring me would be fine.

02:47:51.000 Have you had any of the Dragon's Milk Stouts?

02:47:52.000 That's kind of a tradition here.

02:47:56.000 Is it too late?

02:47:57.000 Can you get me a dragon milk stout or what is that?

02:47:59.000 Whatever you have is fine.

02:48:02.000 Hold on a second.

02:48:03.000 Is someone else going to have that beer?

02:48:06.000 Because you need to have the dragon's milk stout.

02:48:07.000 That's a tradition here.

02:48:08.000 We always have.

02:48:09.000 Does the astronaut want the beer?

02:48:12.000 Okay, bring that to the astronaut.

02:48:14.000 The spaceman who is faking the moon landing behind us as we speak.

02:48:16.000 CJ Craig!

02:48:16.000 Right.

02:48:17.000 I love it.

02:48:18.000 Listen man, do your research.

02:48:20.000 The flag wouldn't blow.

02:48:22.000 There's no wind on the moon.

02:48:23.000 Dorks.

02:48:24.000 There's no wind on the moon!

02:48:28.000 Do we have Anthony Cumia or Anne McElhinney?

02:48:29.000 It's a tradition.

02:48:30.000 Oh man.

02:48:31.000 Actress?

02:48:32.000 Not yet.

02:48:33.000 We've got a minute.

02:48:34.000 We have one more.

02:48:35.000 And then we have, who do we have?

02:48:36.000 Do we have Anthony Cumia or Anne McElhaney?

02:48:39.000 Who do we have coming up next?

02:48:40.000 We're going to try Cumia again.

02:48:41.000 Okay, let's do this.

02:48:42.000 Try Cumia.

02:48:43.000 Let's go to a break, guys.

02:48:45.000 Everyone on social media, let everyone know that they can watch the Oscars live stream on our Facebook page.

02:48:50.000 We've been banned from YouTube.

02:48:52.000 We're going to go to a break.

02:48:53.000 Again, we have some more for you to consider.

02:48:54.000 People have been complaining about the cultural appropriation this year.

02:48:57.000 I don't see it.

02:48:59.000 We'll be right back after this short break.

02:49:00.000 Let everybody know.

02:49:01.000 Oh, wait, hold on a second.

02:49:02.000 We do have a trivia.

02:49:03.000 What's the next trivia question here?

02:49:05.000 Oh, what is Joe Biden's favorite movie?

02:49:10.000 If you get it right, you're not going to get this one right.

02:49:13.000 I have no doubt that no one's going to get this right.

02:49:16.000 You get bragging rights.

02:49:17.000 If you get this right, we will personally break into Nick Searcy's house.

02:49:23.000 Steal an Oscar.

02:49:24.000 Okay.

02:49:25.000 I don't know if they gave him one for Fish Head.

02:49:26.000 I don't think he has one.

02:49:27.000 No.

02:49:27.000 I think he puts it on a little more than he's asked.

02:49:29.000 Shape of water!

02:49:29.000 Shape of water.

02:49:31.000 I don't care.

02:49:32.000 Damn you, Crowder!

02:49:32.000 It's a fish sex movie, and we will give it to you if you get this trivia question right.

02:49:37.000 We're gonna go to break.

02:49:38.000 We'll be right back after this.

02:49:40.000 For your consideration for Best Actor in a Leading Role, Al Pacino in Malcolm X. These are the questions!

02:49:51.000 You and I need to ask.

02:49:53.000 How did you get this mind?

02:49:54.000 You are not an American.

02:49:57.000 You are an African who happens to be American.

02:50:02.000 You gotta understand the difference.

02:50:05.000 We didn't come over here on the Nina, the Pinta, the Centum, or whatever you call it.

02:50:11.000 We didn't land on Plymouth Rock.

02:50:15.000 Plymouth Rock landed right on us.

02:50:20.000 Right on our big ass!

02:50:30.000 louderwithproudershop.com is now selling baseball teams in red, blue, and ash.

02:50:37.000 Get yours at ladderwithcrottershop.com today!

02:50:40.000 You wanna read?

02:50:49.000 Why?

02:50:52.000 Have you, uh, had any experience with that?

02:50:56.000 Twelve years at YouTube, I've seen some pretty awful s***.

02:51:01.000 You had any experience with that?

02:51:02.000 What do you mean, personally?

02:51:07.000 Yeah.

02:51:08.000 Yeah.

02:51:09.000 I have.

02:51:11.000 It's never good.

02:51:12.000 My boss at YouTube was an alcoholic.

02:51:17.000 I mean, f***ing drunk.

02:51:20.000 She used to come in hammered, looking to whale on somebody so I'd provoke her.

02:51:24.000 Hoping she wouldn't go after the smaller channels.

02:51:29.000 Interesting nights were when she just finished watching Vox.

02:51:33.000 Yeah, they used to just outright demonetize our videos.

02:51:36.000 Until they realized that violating public single-party consent laws could cause more damage.

02:51:41.000 Then there was this one time this tranny complained that we filmed him without permission at a public town hall while he's advocating f***ing pumping kids full of g*** and puberty blockers.

02:51:50.000 YouTube execs gave us the choice to blur every face in the whole f***ing video or said we could just skip the time and have it outright removed.

02:51:59.000 Said choose.

02:52:00.000 Well, I'd have to go with just removing it there, Vanna.

02:52:02.000 Nah, we went with blurring all the faces.

02:52:05.000 Why?

02:52:07.000 Because f*** them, that's why.

02:52:08.000 And your cop received a heart strike anyway.

02:52:13.000 So what is it?

02:52:14.000 Crowder's got some kind of rebellion complex or something?

02:52:17.000 Some kind of a f***ing general problem with authority?

02:52:19.000 Is that why you have to put a half-Asian lawyer on retainer full-time?

02:52:23.000 I didn't know you had.

02:52:24.000 Yeah, well, I did.

02:52:27.000 You wanna talk about it?

02:52:27.000 No.

02:52:32.000 Hey, Crowder.

02:52:34.000 I don't know a lot.

02:52:37.000 But you see this?

02:52:39.000 All this s***.

02:52:41.000 The demonetization, the heart strikes, the video removals, the policies.

02:52:47.000 It's not your fault.

02:52:49.000 Yeah, I know that.

02:52:51.000 Look at me, son.

02:52:53.000 It's not your fault.

02:52:56.000 I know.

02:52:57.000 No.

02:52:58.000 It's not your fault.

02:53:01.000 I know.

02:53:01.000 No.

02:53:02.000 No, you don't.

02:53:04.000 It's not your fault.

02:53:14.000 Thank you.

02:53:16.000 Thank you.

02:53:17.000 It's not your fault.

02:53:18.000 Don't f**k with me!

02:53:19.000 It's not me, not you!

02:53:21.000 Don't f**k with me!

02:53:24.000 It's not your fault.

02:53:45.000 I'm sorry.

02:54:01.000 Yay, more jaws!

02:54:15.000 That's all folks!

02:54:38.000 See you next week!

02:54:56.000 And we are back!

02:54:57.000 Not really.

02:54:57.000 We're only back on the Facebook because we've been banned from the YouTube.

02:55:00.000 Right now they're doing... Are they doing Best Director?

02:55:02.000 Are they doing Best Actress?

02:55:03.000 They're just showing a clip of the Green Book.

02:55:05.000 The Green Book.

02:55:06.000 That guy must be really cold with the beanie.

02:55:08.000 Yeah.

02:55:09.000 It's helpful.

02:55:10.000 I think they're doing Best Actress right now.

02:55:11.000 Or he's in a Ricky Iglesias video that's dropping pretty soon.

02:55:15.000 I am interested in seeing what Best Actress is.

02:55:17.000 Please let us know who you think should win Best Actress.

02:55:20.000 Let me hear this really quickly.

02:55:22.000 I'll go with Lady Gaga.

02:55:23.000 Sam Rockwell.

02:55:24.000 Really liked Sam Rockwell in all of his films except I didn't think he did a great job as George W. Bush.

02:55:29.000 I don't like Josh Brolin.

02:55:30.000 I think he did a good job.

02:55:31.000 Let me hear what they're presenting here.

02:55:34.000 Best Actress in a Leading Role.

02:55:34.000 Let's just hear it a little bit.

02:55:37.000 This is the one from Roma who looks at the camera 19 times.

02:55:41.000 Watch the clips they show this year.

02:55:43.000 This is how you know that these are weak categories.

02:55:45.000 Look at this.

02:55:46.000 Compare this with, again, uh, I mean, compare it with, like, Natalie Wood.

02:55:50.000 Or, uh, compare it with, uh, I hate to say it, but Monique in Precious.

02:55:54.000 Yeah, that was one where she's like, just hand her the Oscar.

02:55:57.000 She's laying on a sundial.

02:56:00.000 That couldn't have been the best part of the movie.

02:56:01.000 If that was the best part of the movie, you'd suck.

02:56:03.000 I like to do laundry because I'm the maid.

02:56:06.000 The maid?

02:56:07.000 What was that?

02:56:08.000 I am the maid and I like to do laundry and I have to clean up dog shit.

02:56:13.000 The whole film is just her cleaning up dog crap.

02:56:15.000 Then she thinks she's pregnant.

02:56:16.000 There is a guy doing martial arts.

02:56:18.000 Have you seen?

02:56:19.000 Roma?

02:56:19.000 No.

02:56:20.000 There's a guy doing full frontal nudity.

02:56:23.000 Pecker, Balls, or as broad as I can pronounce him, Balls.

02:56:25.000 Balls?

02:56:28.000 Balls Pecker, he takes a shower curtain rod and he's doing martial arts.

02:56:31.000 Really?

02:56:32.000 And it goes on for like a minute and a half.

02:56:34.000 But we're supposed to go like, oh this is incredible because it's black and white.

02:56:37.000 It's just a naked guy doing fake kung fu.

02:56:41.000 But I repeat myself, all kung fu is fake.

02:56:47.000 The Queen did a very good job here in The Favourite.

02:56:51.000 I was going to say Unforgiven, because it's another F film.

02:56:55.000 She did a very good job.

02:56:56.000 Lady Gaga was very good as well.

02:56:59.000 I don't know if she has to win.

02:57:00.000 She was a better singer than she really was an actress in the film, but she was surprisingly good.

02:57:04.000 Yeah, but that was such a big part.

02:57:05.000 I've got to say, Lady Gaga is actually very beautiful when she's not a Lady Gaga, though.

02:57:10.000 It's true.

02:57:10.000 Yeah, that's true.

02:57:11.000 This is one thing, the only people who are telling you that you can't be natural, it's your industry, Hollywood.

02:57:17.000 When you talk about these unrealistic beauty standards, everyone in the country was saying, man, Lady Gaga's actually really pretty when she's not looking, when she's not trying so hard, this affected I am who I am.

02:57:28.000 No, listen.

02:57:29.000 The meat dress is not your essence, okay?

02:57:31.000 It's a gimmick that you're pushing, let's be honest.

02:57:33.000 It's not genuinely you.

02:57:35.000 It's something that someone else told you would generate some magazine subscriptions.

02:57:39.000 And it did.

02:57:40.000 And everyone in the country goes, man, Lady Gaga looks great when she looks natural.

02:57:44.000 We really like her.

02:57:45.000 It's the industry that tells her she has to be a certain way.

02:57:47.000 And it took me a little while to actually figure out that's who it was.

02:57:49.000 Oscar goes to...

02:57:54.000 Good!

02:57:54.000 That's good.

02:57:55.000 I really thought they were going to give it to the camera looker.

02:57:57.000 You know what it is?

02:57:58.000 I didn't see the movie.

02:57:59.000 I really liked her in Poor Church.

02:58:00.000 Is that Harvey Weinstein?

02:58:01.000 Oh really?

02:58:02.000 I liked her in Hot Fuzz.

02:58:03.000 Was she in Hot Fuzz?

02:58:04.000 She was in Hot Fuzz.

02:58:05.000 I didn't really like Hot Fuzz.

02:58:05.000 Hot Fuzz sucked.

02:58:07.000 I liked Shaun of the Dead.

02:58:08.000 I thought Hot Fuzz was very overrated.

02:58:09.000 I agree.

02:58:10.000 Hot Fuzz was very overrated.

02:58:11.000 Shaun of the Dead was excellent.

02:58:13.000 Shaun of the Dead was excellent.

02:58:14.000 Hot Fuzz was okay.

02:58:16.000 In my opinion.

02:58:17.000 It was Transformers 3.

02:58:18.000 And the third movie they made, I forget the name of it.

02:58:20.000 At World's End.

02:58:21.000 At World's End.

02:58:21.000 I didn't mind that.

02:58:22.000 The bar scenes were fun.

02:58:24.000 What the hell is going on behind me?

02:58:27.000 No wonder people think you faked the moon landing.

02:58:29.000 By the way, we have the trivia answer.

02:58:31.000 We have the trivia answer, by the way.

02:58:33.000 You know the trivia answer.

02:58:34.000 Joe Biden's favorite film?

02:58:37.000 You wrote it!

02:58:37.000 Was it Lolita?

02:58:39.000 What is it?

02:58:41.000 Joe Biden's favorite film?

02:58:43.000 I think it's, what is it?

02:58:44.000 It's a tie between Lolita and kids.

02:58:46.000 Is kids a film?

02:58:48.000 I think it's just the children.

02:58:49.000 Is it like Bay Bay's Kids or which kids are we talking about?

02:58:52.000 I don't know.

02:58:52.000 I don't like that one.

02:58:53.000 That's the only one that I didn't have time.

02:58:55.000 I didn't put a spritz on it.

02:58:59.000 This trivia.

02:58:59.000 What is Bernie Sanders' favorite film of all time?

02:59:03.000 Can we bring that up?

02:59:05.000 Bernie Sanders' favorite film of all time.

02:59:07.000 Tweet us right now.

02:59:09.000 We have best director.

02:59:10.000 How long do we have to give them?

02:59:11.000 We don't have Anthony Cumia, do we?

02:59:13.000 We don't have Anthony Cumia, okay.

02:59:14.000 Are we having problems with... Well, you know what?

02:59:17.000 I think, actually, are we ready to play?

02:59:19.000 Ready to play.

02:59:21.000 You know, the one game that we have tonight?

02:59:23.000 What do you think?

02:59:26.000 I'm talking about Clue.

02:59:27.000 I got it ready.

02:59:28.000 It's time to play the Oscars edition of Spot the Tranny.

02:59:32.000 This is Lerner and Crowder's anti-Oscars party edition of Spot the Tranny.

02:59:39.000 Am I to understand that just as soon as we decided we're playing Spot the Tranny, people here are talking that we have Anthony Cumia?

02:59:45.000 I think we have someone.

02:59:47.000 I don't care who we have, we already moved on.

02:59:49.000 Close the damn door, you're letting the draft in.

02:59:51.000 I just see a hand through the door, like the hand in Are You Afraid of the Dark, the intro.

02:59:57.000 Um, the Oscars edition of Spot the Tranny.

02:59:59.000 We can turn down the Oscars a little bit.

03:00:00.000 Spot the Tranny.

03:00:01.000 Alright, Quarter Black Garrett, let's bring this up here first.

03:00:04.000 I'm the reigning champion.

03:00:04.000 I've never lost.

03:00:05.000 What do you think?

03:00:06.000 Oh, come on.

03:00:06.000 That's just a Photoshop where you put a bald cap on somebody.

03:00:09.000 Not a Photoshop.

03:00:10.000 Not a Photoshop?

03:00:11.000 Isn't that Britney Spears?

03:00:12.000 Not a Photoshop.

03:00:13.000 I'm going to say not a tranny.

03:00:15.000 That's just someone with a horrible scalp condition.

03:00:17.000 Tranny.

03:00:18.000 I'll go not a tranny.

03:00:19.000 Tranny.

03:00:20.000 I say no.

03:00:20.000 What is it?

03:00:21.000 It is...

03:00:24.000 That one is, your guess, is as good as mine.

03:00:27.000 Well, that doesn't seem like that's right.

03:00:28.000 Doesn't seem like it's very helpful.

03:00:30.000 Alright, let's go on to the next one.

03:00:31.000 I don't think we were supposed to go to the most difficult one right off the bat.

03:00:34.000 There's supposed to be an arc to this Court of Black game.

03:00:36.000 Here we go, here we go.

03:00:37.000 Rodigan just has a dragon's milk stout.

03:00:39.000 You think he has a snowball's chance in hell of getting this?

03:00:42.000 No.

03:00:42.000 Can you even see the monitor?

03:00:44.000 I can, it's right there.

03:00:45.000 You're pointing at me!

03:00:46.000 You're pointing at Gerald.

03:00:50.000 Let the record show that the monitor is in fact not Gerald.

03:00:53.000 Alright, next one.

03:00:54.000 Let's see this.

03:00:55.000 As long as the sound is going out so everyone else can play along, you let us know.

03:00:59.000 Alright, next one.

03:01:01.000 That's a dude.

03:01:02.000 Not a Photoshop. These all seem like glam shots.

03:01:04.000 That's a dude.

03:01:06.000 No, hold on a second. Let me know, Edis Crowder, what you guys think.

03:01:08.000 I gotta say, with this, it's not the obvious answer.

03:01:11.000 It's like Norm MacDonald in the Who Wants to be a Millionaire?

03:01:13.000 The Million Dollar Question.

03:01:14.000 I think all of... You say dude, you say dude.

03:01:16.000 Just because, to me, it's so clearly obviously a dude.

03:01:19.000 Just like Americans so clearly do not want to see a fish sex film,

03:01:23.000 I think it's gonna zig when we think it's going to zag.

03:01:26.000 I say it's a transsexual. What is the answer there, Cordo Black Garrett?

03:01:32.000 That is not a tranny!

03:01:34.000 Yes, baby!

03:01:36.000 Yes, baby!

03:01:37.000 You really put it to us on that one.

03:01:38.000 That's not really fair.

03:01:39.000 No, that was obvious, and you made it harder than it was.

03:01:41.000 Well, you know what?

03:01:42.000 I overthinked it.

03:01:42.000 Made you think?

03:01:43.000 When we played the drinking game on Oscars night and, you know, the possibility tomorrow morning that we're all out of a job, I overthink things.

03:01:49.000 That's true.

03:01:50.000 Yes.

03:01:50.000 Alright, next one.

03:01:52.000 Next one.

03:01:53.000 Play along with us.

03:01:54.000 Ready?

03:01:54.000 Here we go.

03:01:55.000 What do we think?

03:01:56.000 Oh, that's so clearly a tranny.

03:01:58.000 I'm gonna say that's a tranny.

03:01:59.000 I'm gonna say that's not a tranny.

03:02:01.000 I'm gonna say tranny.

03:02:02.000 Really?

03:02:03.000 No Adam's apple there.

03:02:04.000 I'm not seeing the Adam's apple.

03:02:05.000 Oh, you can get that removed, I think.

03:02:06.000 I don't know how it works.

03:02:07.000 I think you can, but that takes commitment.

03:02:09.000 If you can butterfly your c**k.

03:02:11.000 I just demonetized you.

03:02:14.000 I demonetized myself, okay?

03:02:15.000 to reopen it as a wound because of your body naturally.

03:02:18.000 That's what it is.

03:02:19.000 Just like when we did the, you know what I want to do?

03:02:22.000 I want to show people what the sex reassignment surgery is, just like we did with the late term abortion,

03:02:26.000 so people know what they're talking about.

03:02:27.000 Like that video, yeah, yeah.

03:02:28.000 I just demonetized you.

03:02:30.000 I demonetized myself, okay?

03:02:33.000 I'm not going to lie, I'm very ashamed.

03:02:35.000 I'm very ashamed of what I've become.

03:02:38.000 I feel like that point needed to be driven home.

03:02:40.000 Alright, what's the answer there, Quarterback Garrett?

03:02:42.000 Not.

03:02:42.000 It is... Not.

03:02:46.000 Jeez, you're taking your time.

03:02:48.000 Alright, one more is a tiebreaker here.

03:02:53.000 One more, one more.

03:02:55.000 Alright, let's show us this.

03:02:56.000 Everyone playing along.

03:02:57.000 No one's listening on audio because it's been banned.

03:03:01.000 So if you're watching this, so you're playing Spot the Tranny.

03:03:04.000 To Facebook, we love you Mark Zuckerberg.

03:03:06.000 Yeah, exactly.

03:03:07.000 Make the kids look away for this one.

03:03:09.000 Okay, no, well, hold on a second.

03:03:11.000 It's not that bad.

03:03:14.000 Oh, well, listen.

03:03:16.000 I would imagine that anytime you use a picture that would seem titillating, it's a trap.

03:03:19.000 Wait, did you say that on purpose?

03:03:21.000 Yes.

03:03:21.000 I'm just kidding.

03:03:22.000 He thinks it was an accident, Brodigan.

03:03:23.000 No, nothing you do is an accident.

03:03:25.000 I have no idea what it is.

03:03:26.000 Is he new here?

03:03:27.000 That lead gold paint has seeped into my head.

03:03:30.000 Like LSD on the Vietcong on a Jeep steering wheel.

03:03:33.000 I did it for all of you.

03:03:34.000 I gotta go tranny.

03:03:36.000 You did it because you would have gotten fired if you didn't.

03:03:38.000 Alright, I say tranny.

03:03:39.000 What do you say?

03:03:40.000 I say tranny.

03:03:41.000 I'm saying tranny so I don't lose.

03:03:43.000 I'm not gonna lie, I'm pretty tired of this game because I feel like I've been looking at them all night.

03:03:49.000 I've been watching the Oscars.

03:03:50.000 The monitor isn't all that different from the audience.

03:03:51.000 I'm not gonna lie. I'm pretty tired of this game because I feel like I've been looking at them all night

03:03:55.000 I've been watching the Oscars the monitor isn't all that different from the audience all right. Don't don't leave us.

03:04:03.000 You know waiting Okay, here's what I will say here

03:04:08.000 No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

03:04:10.000 This is very important.

03:04:11.000 If we're talking about in memoriam here, and I think it was last year that Joan Rivers passed, I cannot go against arguably the funniest lady of all time.

03:04:20.000 She was convinced that Michelle Obama was in fact transgender.

03:04:24.000 I'm not going to say full transsexual.

03:04:26.000 I would never say this.

03:04:27.000 No.

03:04:28.000 None of us here would say it.

03:04:29.000 Not at all.

03:04:29.000 But Joan Rivers did.

03:04:30.000 And it would be disrespectful to the deceased.

03:04:35.000 One of the greatest comedians of all time.

03:04:37.000 Of all time.

03:04:38.000 I don't want anyone here to even try disrespecting Joan Rivers.

03:04:42.000 So everyone here has to declare that Michelle Obama is in fact a transgender or you will be fired.

03:04:48.000 On behalf of Joan Rivers.

03:04:49.000 On behalf of Joan Rivers.

03:04:51.000 And Melissa Rivers, if you're watching, we love your mom.

03:04:53.000 We love your mom.

03:04:56.000 This is out of our hands.

03:04:57.000 Give us the answer there, Quarter Black Garrett.

03:04:58.000 It better be the right one.

03:04:59.000 Not tranny for legal purposes.

03:05:03.000 That little caveat.

03:05:04.000 Are we sending out Betty?

03:05:05.000 Hey, Betty!

03:05:07.000 Here's unnecessarily cute puppy time.

03:05:10.000 I don't know if we can... That is so cute.

03:05:13.000 There you go, Betty.

03:05:15.000 She's an equal opportunity licker.

03:05:18.000 Is this best director up here?

03:05:19.000 Betty doesn't care.

03:05:20.000 I don't know.

03:05:21.000 She's just like, hi guys.

03:05:23.000 Look at that mustache!

03:05:25.000 I gotta tell you, father, you look like a grade-A f***!

03:05:30.000 I want you to go outside and I'll fight you like one of those ceramic pots!

03:05:33.000 She didn't stay a pup for long.

03:05:34.000 I don't know what it is with Betty.

03:05:35.000 She hates pots.

03:05:36.000 Really?

03:05:37.000 Any clay pots, she just destroys them.

03:05:39.000 Alright, Betty, you gotta go.

03:05:40.000 Go to mama.

03:05:42.000 Betty, go.

03:05:42.000 She's like, screw it.

03:05:43.000 I'm on my own.

03:05:44.000 Betty, hold on.

03:05:44.000 There you go.

03:05:45.000 Alright, so this is best... Oh, hold on.

03:05:46.000 She's gonna take a dump.

03:05:48.000 She's gonna take it off.

03:05:49.000 We've got Best Director coming up right now.

03:05:52.000 Best Director.

03:05:52.000 While Stephen's running around, we have Best Director coming up.

03:05:57.000 I think this is going to Spike Lee.

03:05:58.000 Hey, you insubordinate bitch!

03:06:01.000 Jane, you ignorant slut!

03:06:04.000 Get the long shot on this.

03:06:05.000 This is gold.

03:06:07.000 This is gold, baby.

03:06:08.000 And the Oscar goes to...

03:06:15.000 Stephen's ass.

03:06:16.000 Who?

03:06:16.000 Right when you said that.

03:06:18.000 I don't even know who that is.

03:06:19.000 Wait.

03:06:20.000 Hold.

03:06:21.000 Here we go.

03:06:21.000 Was it Roma?

03:06:22.000 Best director.

03:06:23.000 It better not be Roma.

03:06:24.000 It better not be freaking Roma.

03:06:25.000 I don't know.

03:06:26.000 Can someone tell me who won?

03:06:27.000 Who is it?

03:06:27.000 Coming up.

03:06:28.000 Hold on.

03:06:28.000 Roma.

03:06:30.000 I'm pretty sure it's Roma.

03:06:31.000 Put up the bottom third.

03:06:32.000 Yeah, it's Roma.

03:06:33.000 It is exceedingly rare, by the way, that someone who wins Best Director does not win Best Picture.

03:06:38.000 And by the way, the Academy is, they're cheering their own death if Roma wins.

03:06:42.000 I think we might have a guess, because there's a producer standing there.

03:06:45.000 Are you saying we have a guess?

03:06:48.000 I think after Best Director it goes to Best Picture and then we're going to have to close the show out.

03:06:48.000 You know what?

03:06:52.000 Teller, thank you so much.

03:06:53.000 Anne McElhenney, we'll have you on the show very soon.

03:06:56.000 I know you've been so flexible and helpful.

03:06:59.000 We apologize.

03:07:00.000 We didn't want to be banned from YouTube either and have to change this whole schedule.

03:07:03.000 Let me hear what he says.

03:07:05.000 Oh Roma!

03:07:07.000 It was a personal story about his maid and he's clearly one of the light, I hate to say this, but in Mexico they actually really are racist and lighter-skinned Mexicans tend to at that point in time made up the vast majority of Mexicans in college which is only 2% of the population.

03:07:24.000 Wow.

03:07:25.000 So when I see a gray-haired Mexican who's making films I do tend to think he's one of the actual Bourgeoisie.

03:07:31.000 Yeah.

03:07:32.000 Okay.

03:07:33.000 Let's hear what he says because we're gonna have to finish our drinks.

03:07:35.000 And then costume winner.

03:07:38.000 That's right.

03:07:39.000 So if... Hold on a second.

03:07:39.000 Yeah.

03:07:40.000 Oh, that guy wants to sleep with him.

03:07:42.000 Definitely.

03:07:42.000 He's eye-stripping him so hard right now.

03:07:44.000 Hold on a second.

03:07:45.000 Oh, that guy wants to sleep with him.

03:07:48.000 Definitely.

03:07:49.000 He's eye stripping him so hard right now.

03:07:52.000 Hold on a second.

03:07:54.000 I have to see what this guy says.

03:07:57.000 I want to thank the Academy for recognizing a film centered around an indigenous woman.

03:08:03.000 As Americans, we can't say indigenous.

03:08:10.000 A character that historically has been relegated in the background in cinema is to look where others don't.

03:08:20.000 This responsibility becomes much more important in times when we are being encouraged to look away.

03:08:25.000 Nobody's saying to look away.

03:08:29.000 Spanish drink.

03:08:31.000 You're just looking for any excuse.

03:08:32.000 Careful, that beer's 12%!

03:08:33.000 Here's 12%.

03:08:34.000 Build the wall.

03:08:35.000 Because every time, listen, every time I tune in, I'm trying to watch the latest installment

03:08:44.000 of Ozark, you piece of shit.

03:08:46.000 It's ruining my feed of suggestions.

03:08:48.000 Netflix, why would you do that to me?

03:08:50.000 Why would you suggest that?

03:08:52.000 Okay, frankly, you know that I was never looking for that in my feed.

03:08:56.000 What's going on there, Producer Tim?

03:08:58.000 He's just pointing at his head.

03:09:02.000 No, we're good. We're good on guests here. We're gonna be wrapping this up.

03:09:04.000 Let's just, let's make this simple because I don't want to be caught on a guest when they give us Best Picture.

03:09:09.000 That's right.

03:09:10.000 Someone can maybe bring up, can someone do the research and confirm with me?

03:09:13.000 There is a very, there's been a very limited number of times that someone won Best Director and it didn't go on to win Best Picture.

03:09:19.000 Okay.

03:09:20.000 If I'm not mistaken, I think it might have been No Country for, who can bring that up?

03:09:24.000 Who can actually bring that up and send that to us?

03:09:26.000 Let's get that in a second.

03:09:27.000 And we also need the costume winner.

03:09:29.000 Okay, but before the costume winner, The answer, what is Bernie Sanders' favorite film?

03:09:34.000 The answer is actually, it's a tie.

03:09:36.000 Really?

03:09:36.000 Yeah, between the Motorcycle Diaries, no surprise, and the Human Centipede, which really is also no surprise.

03:09:43.000 What was most surprising?

03:09:44.000 It was the sequel.

03:09:45.000 The sequel?

03:09:46.000 Yeah, we didn't label it properly, but it was the sequel.

03:09:48.000 The one song, Andrea Ocasio-Cortez?

03:09:50.000 Yes, pretty much.

03:09:51.000 Because what you gotta understand is that in 12 years, there will not be a Human Centipede.

03:09:59.000 I never saw it, but the concept freaks me out.

03:10:02.000 There'll be no one left to sew butts to mouths!

03:10:07.000 Apparently there's a story today that no one knows where she's actually from, because she has no district offices set up in her office, and apparently she's been using her father's condo.

03:10:22.000 As a residency.

03:10:23.000 How many beers have you had?

03:10:24.000 This really seems like a drunken rant.

03:10:26.000 Okay, no, it sounds like a drunken... No, no, no, no, no.

03:10:31.000 Hold on, hold on.

03:10:32.000 You're a hooker?

03:10:34.000 I thought I was just doing well with you.

03:10:37.000 If it sounds like a drunken rant, blame the reporters at the New York Post.

03:10:42.000 That's true.

03:10:43.000 I don't, I blame you!

03:10:43.000 I definitely blame you.

03:10:45.000 Yeah, because the birth certificate thing really went out well for us.

03:10:48.000 But I think we can all agree that she's a far cry from the red-headed conquistador.

03:10:53.000 Huh?

03:10:54.000 Cortez.

03:10:56.000 Oh, I thought that was a euphemism.

03:10:57.000 Am I mistaking Conquistadors right now?

03:10:59.000 I don't know what you're doing.

03:11:01.000 I don't know what's happening.

03:11:02.000 Are you talking about a Three Musketeers or something?

03:11:05.000 No, I'm talking about the Conquistadors.

03:11:07.000 Am I thinking of Eric the Red or did Cortez also?

03:11:10.000 Wasn't he a red-headed?

03:11:12.000 I'm actually confused which one of us is the drunk one.

03:11:15.000 I don't know.

03:11:16.000 I'm just very tired.

03:11:17.000 Best picture!

03:11:18.000 Oh my gosh!

03:11:18.000 Julia Roberts!

03:11:20.000 Oh my gosh!

03:11:22.000 And then quiet.

03:11:23.000 She looks great, Julia Roberts.

03:11:24.000 I gotta say this.

03:11:24.000 She does.

03:11:25.000 When I was a kid, I had a huge... Oh, not a thing.

03:11:28.000 That is Julia Roberts.

03:11:29.000 I'm kidding, I'm kidding.

03:11:30.000 I'm messing with Steven.

03:11:30.000 Huge.

03:11:32.000 I can't do that?

03:11:32.000 What?

03:11:34.000 She did age well.

03:11:35.000 She does look great, but I do feel like she's going to swallow that microphone whole like the kid in a school bus who swallows his fist.

03:11:42.000 And that would be so hot.

03:11:44.000 Man.

03:11:44.000 You're so drunk.

03:11:50.000 Not necessarily.

03:11:52.000 No.

03:11:52.000 Not necessarily.

03:11:53.000 I watched Roma and I thought, I don't feel connected to this maybe it's good enough dog crap at all.

03:11:59.000 More the part of the wealthiest 2% doctor who employs her.

03:12:03.000 And cheats on his wife.

03:12:04.000 I don't feel connected to the Black Klansman.

03:12:07.000 So black, black, gay.

03:12:08.000 I don't have AIDS!

03:12:09.000 Better not.

03:12:10.000 Gay.

03:12:11.000 Black, black, gay, gay.

03:12:13.000 So far.

03:12:13.000 Okay, call it.

03:12:14.000 Who do you think wins?

03:12:15.000 Best picture.

03:12:18.000 Probably Roma.

03:12:19.000 The Queen movie.

03:12:20.000 Bohemian Rhapsody.

03:12:22.000 Okay, I want a star is born, probably Roma.

03:12:25.000 It better not be Roma.

03:12:26.000 I didn't realize Vice was nominated for Best Picture.

03:12:27.000 I thought it was just Best Actor.

03:12:28.000 Okay, let's see who it is.

03:12:29.000 I'm going to call Roma.

03:12:32.000 And the Oscar goes to... Green Book.

03:12:36.000 What?!

03:12:36.000 Wow!

03:12:37.000 Wow!

03:12:38.000 Didn't see that one coming.

03:12:39.000 Did you hear the audience?

03:12:40.000 Everyone was very surprised.

03:12:41.000 Okay, before we close this show out, before we close the show out, who's the winner of the costume contest tonight?

03:12:45.000 You get the golden mug.

03:12:46.000 The winner is Maddie.

03:12:48.000 Bring it up.

03:12:49.000 Hold on a second.

03:12:50.000 Hold on a second.

03:12:51.000 Before we close out.

03:12:51.000 Hold on one second.

03:12:52.000 Before we close this out.

03:12:54.000 We gotta bring it up.

03:12:55.000 Do we know who the costume contest winner is?

03:12:56.000 We don't know who the costume... Okay, we're gonna announce that tomorrow on Twitter.

03:12:59.000 What's the moral of the story tonight?

03:13:00.000 Not only was there a bunch of sermonizing, but we got banned simply for criticizing the Oscars.

03:13:05.000 Okay, the moral of the story is that YouTube sucks, and I just... I don't know what this is, but... I do think that that is the important moral to take away from this story.

03:13:13.000 This is a very self-important pageant of self-congratulating awards that are being given here.

03:13:20.000 And I would like to self-congratulate you for hiring us.

03:13:22.000 Thank you very much.

03:13:22.000 What are you looking at there, Producer Tim?

03:13:28.000 Are we good?

03:13:28.000 Okay, well thank you so much for everyone who joined us.

03:13:30.000 What about the beard beard?

03:13:30.000 Oh, well we're gonna do that another day.

03:13:32.000 We're gonna make beer from Brodigan's beard.

03:13:34.000 Next time I'm here.

03:13:35.000 No, we'll do it before you leave.

03:13:36.000 We'll do it live.

03:13:36.000 What was that?

03:13:37.000 What's happened here?

03:13:37.000 We're gonna make beer beer from a Brodigan's beard from that least in his beard next time. I'm here. No

03:13:42.000 We'll do it when we'll do it before you leave all right We'll do a lot

03:13:47.000 What's what's going on? What what?

03:13:51.000 Oh, there's smoke over there.

03:13:52.000 We have a Nike!

03:13:54.000 Mike Myers with the sneaker.

03:13:56.000 Oh, that's a PR nightmare for Nike.

03:13:58.000 Alright guys, we're gonna have to get some paramedics in here.

03:14:00.000 Thank you so much for watching Hashtag Crowder's anti-Oscars party.

03:14:03.000 Tomorrow we'll see what we can get up live on the YouTube.

03:14:06.000 I just hope he's okay so we can get back to a life of cooking.

03:14:08.000 Thank you so much!

03:14:08.000 We'll see you tomorrow!

03:14:10.000 We'll see you tomorrow!

03:14:12.000 Bye!

03:14:13.000 It should have been A Star is Born!

03:14:14.000 Bye!

03:14:15.000 I'm disappointed in myself.

03:14:17.000 Yes.

03:14:18.000 Hey there, if you like this video, this is the part where I would usually tell you to subscribe, but... I can't do it anymore.

03:14:28.000 I'm gonna tell you to subscribe, and then YouTube is going to decide that we can't reach you even though you subscribe to this channel, and then I'll say hit the notification bell, and then the notification bell won't even be there anymore.

03:14:39.000 I don't know what to say.

03:14:42.000 More than likely you'll find my face in a milk carton.

03:14:44.000 But do what you can to stop it.

Louder with Crowder - March 07, 2019

UNBANNED: Full Oscars Live Stream Released! | Louder With Crowder

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