Making Sense - Sam Harris - #297 — Preparing for the End

00:00:00.000 welcome to the making sense podcast this is sam harris just a note to say that if you're hearing

00:00:12.500 this you are not currently on our subscriber feed and will only be hearing the first part

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00:00:27.020 podcatcher along with other subscriber only content we don't run ads on the podcast and

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00:00:36.680 we're doing here please consider becoming one

00:00:38.840 okay well this week is the fourth anniversary over at waking up and i wanted to share a bit more about

00:00:53.280 why i've decided to put so much attention over there to build the app in the first place seems

00:01:00.080 to me that many of you in the making sense audience don't necessarily understand what i'm doing over

00:01:04.720 there when i was a teenager after two people very close to me died i became interested in certain

00:01:14.560 esoteric questions like what is the nature of consciousness and what is a self and what's the

00:01:22.820 connection between the human mind and reality in the first place how is it possible to

00:01:27.620 understand reality and how should our answers to such questions inform how we live now these topics didn't just

00:01:36.880 interest me philosophically or scientifically i wanted to explore them directly through firsthand

00:01:42.660 experience which is to say i wasn't looking to merely know more or to believe new things i wanted to live

00:01:50.820 differently and all this culminated for me after my sophomore year in college when i dropped out of

00:01:57.720 school for what amounted to a full decade this was the late 80s and 90s and during that time i made many

00:02:04.820 trips to india and nepal where i got a chance to study with some of the greatest meditation teachers

00:02:09.660 alive at that point and i spent about two years on silent retreats ranging in length from one week to

00:02:16.920 three months i also read very widely in the literature of philosophy and religion and contemplative

00:02:23.940 spirituality both from the east and the west i also took psychedelics occasionally more so in the

00:02:31.540 beginning and all of this served to fundamentally change my perspective on what was possible for minds

00:02:39.580 like ours so i came out of these years of seeking a very different person and in many ways i found the

00:02:45.900 experiential answers i had been looking for but none of this amounted to making viable contact with the

00:02:52.460 world much less a career so eventually i went back to school where perhaps unsurprisingly i majored in

00:02:59.040 philosophy and because i was still fascinated by the core questions of the mind and its connection to

00:03:05.380 reality at large i then did a phd in neuroscience however just as i was beginning my doctoral research

00:03:11.880 studying belief disbelief and uncertainty using functional magnetic resonance imaging september 11th

00:03:18.620 happened and because i had spent the previous decade deeply immersed in religious literature

00:03:24.440 my concerns about the threat of fundamentalism were already very well formed it really didn't take me

00:03:32.260 more than 24 hours to figure out what we were dealing with and to anticipate how confused many smart

00:03:39.780 people would be by the problem of jihadism the truth is many are still confused by it so i stepped

00:03:47.720 away from my research at that point and published two books the end of faith and then letter to a

00:03:53.780 christian nation which dealt with the christian backlash to the end of faith in both of these books i argue

00:04:00.340 that faith and reason really are in conflict and that religion and science therefore are in perennial

00:04:06.440 conflict and together with the biologist richard dawkins and the philosopher daniel dennett and the

00:04:12.540 writer christopher hitchens i became known as a new atheist and as one of the four horsemen of a new wave of

00:04:19.040 opposition to organized religion and all this took some years to play out and the resulting skirmishes in the

00:04:27.100 culture war kept me away from my research for nearly four years however i've always been truly bored by

00:04:36.240 politics and most interested in those first questions that sent me to asia and into the silence of

00:04:42.360 retreat these questions about consciousness and the self and the nature of reality whether we can know

00:04:51.100 what is real ultimately for me these are not divorced from everyday concerns in fact they directly relate

00:04:58.460 to the most fundamental causes of human happiness and suffering and to the larger question of what it

00:05:03.660 means to live a good life and ironically they keep bringing me back to politics which happens a fair

00:05:09.740 amount on this podcast my main concern at this point is to figure out how we can all live together

00:05:16.860 so as to maximize the chance that humanity will thrive now and in the future so while waking up is

00:05:25.320 often described as a meditation app its purpose isn't just to help you meditate it's to help you live a more

00:05:31.020 examined and fulfilling life altogether the point is to help you close the gap between the person you

00:05:37.900 want to be and the person you seem to be in this moment now like this podcast waking up is run as a

00:05:44.860 subscription business however also like this podcast we've always provided free membership

00:05:49.780 to anyone who can't afford it you need only send an email to support at waking up.com to receive a free

00:05:55.900 year on the app and this can be repeated as many times as one needs our business philosophy is pretty

00:06:02.500 simple of course we want to grow as a company and build wonderful things but we never want money to be

00:06:08.740 the reason why someone can't benefit from our work we also give a minimum of 10 percent of our profits to

00:06:14.480 the most effective charities and this commitment to reducing suffering on other fronts has been

00:06:19.920 central to our mission from the beginning now perhaps you've tried meditation before and decided

00:06:25.200 it's not for you or you think all this talk about the nature of mind and the illusoriness of the self

00:06:30.480 is just new age mumbo-jumbo well okay but if you leave it there you really are shirking the challenge

00:06:40.940 i'm posing to you because my claim is that you have spent most of your life lost in thought that is

00:06:49.320 thinking without recognizing thought itself as a process and therefore not recognizing what the mind

00:06:55.500 is like prior to identification with thought and this status quo is the basis of all of your suffering

00:07:03.740 it's the mechanism by which disappointment and worry and regret and anger and sadness

00:07:11.660 color your life

00:07:13.380 it's the thing that makes you bad company for others

00:07:17.500 and for the important people in your life whom you ostensibly love

00:07:22.080 it's what makes you an asshole

00:07:25.020 when you are an asshole

00:07:26.960 and you are extraordinarily likely to spend the rest of your life in this condition unless you

00:07:34.340 look into the matter deeply and it's over at waking up that i most fully explore this terrain

00:07:41.340 so yet another pitch from me to look into it if you haven't and as chance would have it today's

00:07:49.160 conversation is about death and how to prepare for it in practical terms

00:07:53.620 now death is something i've thought a lot about

00:07:57.780 i've always had a sense that i think about it more than most people

00:08:01.160 certainly more than most people i know

00:08:03.560 i lost one of my best friends when i was 13

00:08:06.880 and my father died when i was 17

00:08:10.220 i don't think this is an unusual amount of exposure

00:08:13.660 to death

00:08:14.800 but for some reason these losses were very formative

00:08:18.560 for me

00:08:19.360 for as long as i can remember certainly since i was 13

00:08:22.880 i've thought about death many times a day

00:08:26.400 some of this thinking may have been morbid

00:08:28.800 but much of it's been useful

00:08:31.400 though i can't say i haven't wasted time

00:08:34.240 i don't have any important regrets at this point

00:08:37.700 in the last few years i've been keenly aware that i've outlived my father

00:08:42.920 he died at 51

00:08:44.760 and i've often recalled what it was like for him to live his last year of a life

00:08:49.260 interrupted by sickness and death

00:08:51.880 when i read or listen to authors or philosophers or scientists who i admire

00:08:57.800 i notice which ones are dead

00:08:59.860 and i notice what age they were when they lived their last day of life

00:09:04.140 and when i hear or read one of them say something about the future

00:09:07.980 i occasionally do a quick bit of math

00:09:10.540 and realize this was a future they never lived to see

00:09:13.900 i enjoy old films and photographs

00:09:17.760 but not merely for what their creators intended

00:09:21.220 i also view them as rather vivid obituaries to the people in them

00:09:26.060 so more and more i live with a sense of the finiteness of life

00:09:30.260 and it's making me wiser i think

00:09:32.980 i mean we work and travel

00:09:36.060 and eat and sleep

00:09:38.520 and dream

00:09:39.760 and we repeat these things

00:09:42.140 as though we might live forever

00:09:43.900 and yet one day we will die

00:09:46.340 there is something astonishing

00:09:50.120 about this

00:09:51.180 i really don't think i'm afraid to die

00:09:54.460 though perhaps i'm afraid of the chaos and pain and indignity

00:09:59.220 that might surround the process of dying

00:10:01.600 but as to the ultimate experience of finally surrendering my life in the world

00:10:06.720 i don't actually worry about that

00:10:08.880 and again i would credit my experience with meditation

00:10:11.600 and also with psychedelics for that

00:10:14.020 i do believe it's possible to run the loss of everything in emulation mode

00:10:19.740 before it actually happens

00:10:21.660 you might see my description of what it was like to take five grams of mushrooms

00:10:26.000 for more color there

00:10:27.740 however losing the people i love

00:10:31.680 is something that worries me

00:10:33.640 paradoxically it doesn't worry me that i will lose everyone when i die

00:10:37.740 i just worry that i could lose some very important people

00:10:40.580 while i still have many years yet to live

00:10:42.720 and i'm also aware that i have at least a few people in my life

00:10:46.320 who are very worried about losing me

00:10:48.240 so anticipated sorrow haunts our living

00:10:53.900 we know we're going to lose people

00:10:56.600 and we know that others we love will lose us

00:10:59.720 we know therefore we will be givers and receivers of grief

00:11:04.120 what a strange situation

00:11:07.560 so much of my interest in meditation derives from this

00:11:12.820 how can we live truly fulfilling lives in light of death

00:11:17.400 how can we prepare our minds to lose everything

00:11:21.420 well among other things

00:11:24.820 by learning what it means to not hold on to anything

00:11:29.000 what is it like to have a mind

00:11:31.960 that doesn't cling to memories

00:11:34.860 or to hopes for the future

00:11:37.040 or to experience itself

00:11:39.620 that is really the essence of meditation

00:11:43.120 meditation isn't in the end a practice

00:11:46.640 you add to your life

00:11:48.100 it is the discovery

00:11:50.060 of what it means

00:11:51.780 to not cling to experience

00:11:54.140 to identity

00:11:55.580 to a concept of a self

00:11:57.820 what is that experience like

00:12:01.160 it's doing less

00:12:03.040 rather than more

00:12:04.300 it is ceasing to do something

00:12:07.040 you're doing by tendency

00:12:08.900 right now

00:12:10.100 and if you can't find

00:12:12.360 that experience of freedom

00:12:13.880 now

00:12:14.720 it seems very unlikely that you'll find it

00:12:17.480 later

00:12:18.440 amid the great unraveling

00:12:21.040 at the end of life

00:12:22.240 anyway

00:12:23.880 today's conversation is a very practical discussion

00:12:26.200 about the unavoidable fact

00:12:28.300 that life ends

00:12:29.680 either you will die

00:12:31.660 and others will have to deal with the aftermath

00:12:33.660 or you will live long enough

00:12:35.820 to have to deal with the deaths

00:12:36.860 of the people you love

00:12:37.880 and then you will die

00:12:39.880 and there really is a fair amount

00:12:41.940 of practical wisdom

00:12:42.860 that can help you navigate this process

00:12:45.020 today I'm speaking with B.J. Miller

00:12:48.020 and Shoshana Berger

00:12:49.120 and they've written a very compassionate

00:12:50.980 and useful book

00:12:52.480 A Beginner's Guide to the End

00:12:54.800 Practical Advice for Living Life

00:12:57.260 and Facing Death

00:12:58.240 and as I emphasized several times

00:13:00.500 in this conversation

00:13:01.360 the conversation really isn't a surrogate

00:13:04.420 for reading the book

00:13:05.360 because there is a fair amount

00:13:06.820 of practical advice to give here

00:13:08.980 B.J. Miller is a hospice

00:13:11.100 and palliative medicine physician

00:13:12.660 who's worked in many different settings

00:13:15.140 and he now sees patients and families

00:13:17.500 at the UCSF

00:13:18.580 Helen Diller Family Comprehensive Cancer Center

00:13:21.220 he speaks all over the country

00:13:23.120 and internationally

00:13:24.360 on the theme of living well

00:13:26.380 in the face of death

00:13:27.260 and he's been profiled

00:13:28.820 in the New York Times

00:13:29.760 and elsewhere

00:13:31.120 Shoshana Berger

00:13:33.000 is the editorial director of IDEO

00:13:34.740 and she was a senior editor

00:13:36.640 at Wired

00:13:37.280 she's written for the New York Times

00:13:39.460 Fast Company

00:13:40.480 Time

00:13:41.260 Wired

00:13:41.900 Popular Science

00:13:43.520 and other journals

00:13:45.160 she's also the author

00:13:47.060 of another book

00:13:47.880 Readymade

00:13:48.960 How to Make Almost Everything

00:13:50.900 and today we talk about

00:13:53.180 preparing for death

00:13:54.720 we discuss the difference

00:13:56.600 between palliative care

00:13:58.080 and hospice

00:13:58.780 the tension between

00:14:00.580 getting the most out of life

00:14:01.920 and not clinging to experience

00:14:04.020 we talk about

00:14:05.760 planning for death

00:14:06.760 while still healthy

00:14:07.720 the importance of an advanced directive

00:14:10.160 navigating the healthcare system

00:14:12.440 pain control

00:14:13.840 at the end of life

00:14:14.720 assisted suicide

00:14:16.660 psychedelic therapy

00:14:18.520 for end of life anxiety

00:14:19.840 and other topics

00:14:21.460 again this is a subject

00:14:24.160 you might not want to think about

00:14:25.500 but I'm convinced

00:14:26.840 you'll be better off

00:14:27.660 if you do

00:14:28.260 and now I bring you

00:14:30.660 BJ Miller

00:14:31.500 and Shoshana Berger

00:14:32.660 I am here with BJ Miller

00:14:40.060 and Shoshana Berger

00:14:41.080 BJ, Shoshana

00:14:42.420 thanks for joining me

00:14:43.280 thanks for having us

00:14:44.720 thanks for having us Sam

00:14:45.500 so you have written

00:14:47.840 a wonderfully useful book

00:14:50.060 together

00:14:50.680 A Beginner's Guide to the End

00:14:52.220 Practical Advice for Living Life

00:14:54.240 and Facing Death

00:14:55.220 but it will not be without

00:14:57.160 trepidation

00:14:58.120 that most people pick up

00:14:59.260 such a volume

00:15:00.740 and I want us to just

00:15:03.040 get into

00:15:03.900 really everything

00:15:05.580 relevant here

00:15:06.780 I mean there's no way

00:15:07.680 this conversation

00:15:08.460 will be a surrogate

00:15:09.760 for reading your book

00:15:10.540 because your book

00:15:11.380 is filled with

00:15:12.180 practical advice

00:15:13.600 that really is better read

00:15:15.680 than listened to

00:15:16.880 in terms of

00:15:17.980 the kind of

00:15:18.560 checklist advice

00:15:19.840 one can have

00:15:20.880 for people facing

00:15:23.180 terminal illness

00:15:23.940 or going through

00:15:25.260 the experience

00:15:25.800 of having a loved one

00:15:27.140 face it

00:15:27.800 so we'll touch on

00:15:28.940 some of that

00:15:29.600 and anything that

00:15:30.700 seems super important

00:15:32.360 feel free to

00:15:33.940 interject it

00:15:34.760 but it's just a note

00:15:36.080 to listeners

00:15:36.580 that there's more

00:15:37.600 in the book

00:15:38.000 of practical significance

00:15:39.600 than we will cover here

00:15:41.240 but before we jump

00:15:42.500 into the topic

00:15:43.260 perhaps each of you

00:15:44.520 can tell me

00:15:45.860 how you came to

00:15:47.260 focus on

00:15:48.340 death and dying

00:15:49.700 professionally

00:15:50.880 to this degree

00:15:51.940 how is that

00:15:52.960 most people

00:15:53.580 think about death

00:15:54.980 but you two

00:15:56.180 have gone

00:15:56.660 all in

00:15:57.420 maybe BJ

00:15:58.380 we can start with you

00:15:59.660 how did you come

00:16:00.380 to this topic

00:16:00.960 yeah

00:16:01.880 a couple different ways

00:16:03.340 Sam

00:16:03.680 professionally

00:16:04.680 well

00:16:04.960 I don't know

00:16:05.720 personally professionally

00:16:06.560 kind of came

00:16:07.320 kind of co-evolved

00:16:09.220 you know

00:16:09.760 for me

00:16:10.220 a lot of it

00:16:10.960 starts with

00:16:11.980 my own injuries

00:16:14.040 when I was 19

00:16:15.540 you know

00:16:15.920 sophomore in college

00:16:16.940 that's when I came

00:16:17.880 very close to death

00:16:18.900 myself

00:16:19.440 and that

00:16:21.140 you know

00:16:22.560 was a real

00:16:23.020 wake up

00:16:23.640 call

00:16:24.300 as you can imagine

00:16:25.120 to take life

00:16:26.840 well

00:16:27.600 as I say

00:16:28.540 take life seriously

00:16:29.380 but also playfully

00:16:31.140 take you know

00:16:31.680 but really get into

00:16:33.100 this thing

00:16:33.540 while I have it

00:16:34.320 it might be worth

00:16:35.320 telling that story

00:16:36.260 however

00:16:36.720 briefly you want to

00:16:37.960 because it's

00:16:38.760 you know

00:16:39.040 people

00:16:39.320 might imagine

00:16:40.900 that you were

00:16:41.400 playing football

00:16:42.180 and got a concussion

00:16:43.440 or something

00:16:44.660 more prosaic

00:16:45.500 but you

00:16:45.880 you had a fairly

00:16:46.620 spectacular encounter

00:16:47.700 with mortality

00:16:48.580 or near mortality

00:16:49.740 I did

00:16:51.200 but

00:16:51.400 I'm chuckling

00:16:52.860 because you reminded me

00:16:53.920 of a moment

00:16:54.860 at a restaurant

00:16:55.720 long ago

00:16:56.760 when I was wearing

00:16:57.360 shorts

00:16:57.800 so I'm a triple amputee

00:16:59.280 guys

00:16:59.580 I'll tell that story

00:17:01.260 in a second

00:17:01.660 but

00:17:02.100 very sweet

00:17:04.420 ancient woman

00:17:05.980 approached me

00:17:06.720 in a restaurant

00:17:07.220 and tapped me

00:17:08.120 in the shoulder

00:17:08.780 and said

00:17:09.460 football injury

00:17:11.020 and

00:17:11.780 I've never

00:17:13.320 I didn't know

00:17:14.640 how to answer that

00:17:15.200 but anyway

00:17:15.500 so yeah

00:17:16.160 when I was 19

00:17:17.120 I was just

00:17:18.660 horsing around

00:17:19.220 with friends

00:17:19.720 and

00:17:20.140 there was a

00:17:21.420 parked commuter train

00:17:22.520 just on the edge

00:17:23.460 of campus

00:17:23.940 sitting there

00:17:24.580 not moving

00:17:25.300 not you know

00:17:25.900 just sitting there

00:17:26.640 and we decided

00:17:27.640 to climb it

00:17:28.180 like you'd climb

00:17:28.800 a tree

00:17:29.200 just kind of

00:17:29.900 being

00:17:30.180 sophomores

00:17:31.700 sophomoric

00:17:32.680 and

00:17:33.460 the power lines

00:17:34.880 run overhead

00:17:35.520 and when I stood up

00:17:37.200 I had a metal watch

00:17:38.600 on my left wrist

00:17:39.760 and the electricity

00:17:40.880 arc to the watch

00:17:42.940 and

00:17:44.100 a big explosion

00:17:45.940 and

00:17:46.300 you know

00:17:47.020 I was in and out

00:17:47.720 of

00:17:47.920 I was close to death

00:17:49.160 in the burn unit

00:17:49.860 there in New Jersey

00:17:50.660 for you know

00:17:51.460 maybe six weeks

00:17:52.400 or so

00:17:52.900 in there a total

00:17:54.020 of three months

00:17:54.700 or so

00:17:55.080 but

00:17:55.300 survived

00:17:56.680 hello

00:17:57.300 but ended up

00:17:58.340 losing both legs

00:17:59.540 below the knee

00:18:00.220 and my left arm

00:18:01.260 below the elbow

00:18:01.900 so

00:18:03.360 yeah

00:18:03.740 it was a pretty

00:18:04.220 spectacular moment

00:18:05.320 that

00:18:05.620 was a real

00:18:06.780 you can imagine

00:18:07.580 real crossroads

00:18:08.240 in my life

00:18:08.840 that led me

00:18:09.700 into medicine

00:18:10.320 and

00:18:11.240 an interest

00:18:12.040 in life

00:18:12.980 that included

00:18:13.860 death

00:18:14.280 an interest

00:18:15.500 in life

00:18:15.880 that included

00:18:16.360 loss

00:18:16.820 and suffering

00:18:17.460 as well as

00:18:18.540 joys

00:18:19.000 and

00:18:19.260 immutability

00:18:20.760 and change

00:18:22.000 so

00:18:22.420 that was

00:18:23.460 very much

00:18:24.160 my entree

00:18:24.640 that took me

00:18:25.580 into medicine

00:18:26.320 at first

00:18:27.300 I was going to do

00:18:27.780 rehab medicine

00:18:28.680 disability

00:18:29.400 was the thing

00:18:30.120 that I kind of

00:18:30.700 walked away

00:18:31.100 most interested

00:18:31.940 in

00:18:32.140 what do

00:18:32.900 human beings

00:18:33.600 do when they

00:18:34.080 bump up

00:18:34.560 against things

00:18:35.180 they can't

00:18:35.920 change

00:18:36.520 or can't

00:18:37.160 control

00:18:37.680 and that was

00:18:39.040 really the nugget

00:18:39.700 for me

00:18:40.240 and from there

00:18:41.200 it was also

00:18:41.840 entwined with

00:18:42.620 death

00:18:43.340 but as I kind of

00:18:44.760 got into it

00:18:45.440 more and more

00:18:46.100 suffering death

00:18:47.300 wanting to change

00:18:48.560 not wanting to

00:18:49.680 change

00:18:50.100 that whole stew

00:18:51.160 kind of begat

00:18:52.600 palliative medicine

00:18:54.020 that took me

00:18:54.740 into hospice

00:18:55.640 and palliative medicine

00:18:56.400 and from there

00:18:57.220 death became

00:18:58.580 front and center

00:18:59.640 with a lot of

00:19:00.200 the hospice work

00:19:01.060 but even for

00:19:02.460 patients who had

00:19:03.400 plenty of life

00:19:04.100 left

00:19:04.500 I was noticing

00:19:05.760 that death

00:19:06.540 either metaphorical

00:19:08.060 death

00:19:08.360 or you know

00:19:09.040 physical death

00:19:09.940 it could be

00:19:11.560 this great

00:19:12.120 prompt

00:19:12.700 this great

00:19:13.820 foil

00:19:14.400 and so

00:19:15.700 that is

00:19:16.360 when I really

00:19:16.840 began to work

00:19:17.500 with it

00:19:17.840 professionally

00:19:18.400 to mirror

00:19:19.680 what I was

00:19:20.060 doing personally

00:19:20.780 so anyway

00:19:22.000 I don't know

00:19:22.680 how short

00:19:23.060 that was

00:19:23.520 but that's

00:19:23.920 the gist

00:19:24.280 of how I

00:19:24.740 got into

00:19:25.200 this subject

00:19:26.000 and

00:19:27.060 Shoshana

00:19:28.340 how did you

00:19:28.880 come to this

00:19:29.540 so it started

00:19:30.840 as a very

00:19:31.680 personal

00:19:32.320 issue for me

00:19:33.560 I had

00:19:34.240 a lot of

00:19:35.280 exposure to

00:19:36.120 death

00:19:36.560 pretty early

00:19:37.620 on in life

00:19:38.440 my college

00:19:40.000 roommate

00:19:40.580 OD'd

00:19:41.640 and I've

00:19:42.400 had actually

00:19:43.020 two

00:19:44.120 boyfriends

00:19:45.300 die of the

00:19:45.880 same cancer

00:19:46.580 which is

00:19:47.160 very odd

00:19:48.300 and then

00:19:49.520 the kind

00:19:51.080 of

00:19:51.360 critical

00:19:52.320 death

00:19:52.640 for me

00:19:52.960 was my

00:19:53.420 father's

00:19:54.040 death

00:19:54.360 and

00:19:54.740 I met

00:19:55.740 BJ

00:19:56.140 just after

00:19:57.760 that

00:19:58.120 and that's

00:19:58.580 when it

00:19:58.820 became

00:19:59.120 professional

00:19:59.680 so we

00:20:00.200 actually

00:20:00.500 we met

00:20:01.140 at IDEO

00:20:01.800 the global

00:20:02.340 design

00:20:02.740 company

00:20:03.120 where I

00:20:03.460 work

00:20:03.860 at the

00:20:04.820 time

00:20:05.100 BJ

00:20:05.360 was the

00:20:06.100 executive

00:20:06.640 director

00:20:07.120 of the

00:20:07.500 Zen

00:20:07.660 Hospice

00:20:08.260 which is

00:20:08.780 this

00:20:09.400 beautiful

00:20:09.800 residential

00:20:10.360 hospice

00:20:10.920 located

00:20:11.440 it used

00:20:11.860 to be

00:20:12.100 located

00:20:12.440 in a

00:20:12.800 Victorian

00:20:13.220 house

00:20:13.580 in San

00:20:13.940 Francisco

00:20:14.360 where

00:20:15.620 people

00:20:15.980 came

00:20:16.380 for

00:20:16.760 comfort

00:20:17.240 and care

00:20:17.860 at the

00:20:18.160 end

00:20:18.280 of

00:20:18.420 life

00:20:18.800 and

00:20:19.860 as

00:20:20.480 you

00:20:20.620 may

00:20:20.780 know

00:20:21.160 Sam

00:20:21.600 hospice

00:20:22.180 carries

00:20:22.740 an

00:20:23.120 unfortunate

00:20:24.120 stigma

00:20:24.860 many

00:20:25.940 people

00:20:26.220 actually

00:20:26.720 consider

00:20:27.280 it

00:20:27.460 to be

00:20:27.700 a

00:20:27.820 kind

00:20:28.000 of

00:20:28.100 death

00:20:28.340 sentence

00:20:28.800 so

00:20:29.960 BJ

00:20:30.580 and

00:20:30.960 his

00:20:31.120 team

00:20:31.340 came

00:20:31.660 to

00:20:31.820 IDEO

00:20:32.120 hoping

00:20:32.380 we

00:20:32.560 could

00:20:32.700 find

00:20:33.020 a

00:20:33.360 creative

00:20:34.020 way

00:20:34.520 to

00:20:34.860 recast

00:20:35.740 or

00:20:36.100 effectively

00:20:37.160 rebrand

00:20:37.960 hospice

00:20:38.660 in a

00:20:39.100 way

00:20:39.240 that

00:20:39.420 would

00:20:39.620 communicate

00:20:40.120 its

00:20:40.460 value

00:20:40.980 because

00:20:41.740 it's

00:20:42.020 really

00:20:42.620 the

00:20:42.840 most

00:20:43.060 holistic

00:20:43.720 palliative

00:20:45.240 and

00:20:45.860 free

00:20:46.440 suite

00:20:46.860 of

00:20:47.020 care

00:20:47.360 you can

00:20:47.980 opt

00:20:48.220 for

00:20:48.460 at

00:20:48.600 the

00:20:48.700 end

00:20:48.820 of

00:20:48.960 life

00:20:49.300 and

00:20:50.180 so

00:20:50.540 when

00:20:50.800 the

00:20:51.020 designers

00:20:51.440 at

00:20:51.620 IDEO

00:20:51.880 caught

00:20:52.120 wind

00:20:52.300 that

00:20:52.420 we'd

00:20:52.580 be

00:20:52.700 working

00:20:52.960 on

00:20:53.260 designing

00:20:53.620 the

00:20:53.780 end

00:20:53.900 of

00:20:54.020 life

00:20:54.280 experience

00:20:54.760 they

00:20:54.960 were

00:20:55.140 so

00:20:55.520 excited

00:20:55.880 about

00:20:56.140 working

00:20:56.480 on

00:20:56.720 something

00:20:57.240 that

00:20:58.260 was

00:20:58.440 so

00:20:58.660 consequential

00:20:59.540 and

00:20:59.960 so

00:21:00.200 poorly

00:21:00.600 designed

00:21:01.340 in

00:21:02.200 American

00:21:02.540 in

00:21:03.100 American

00:21:03.440 largely

00:21:03.580 because

00:21:03.900 we

00:21:04.120 live

00:21:04.560 in

00:21:05.020 denial

00:21:05.580 of

00:21:05.860 our

00:21:05.980 own

00:21:06.160 mortality

00:21:06.640 and

00:21:07.080 do

00:21:07.360 everything

00:21:07.820 we

00:21:08.060 can

00:21:08.280 to

00:21:08.420 avoid

00:21:08.700 thinking

00:21:09.020 about

00:21:09.320 it

00:21:09.540 so

00:21:10.420 this

00:21:11.400 idea

00:21:11.740 of

00:21:12.040 designing

00:21:12.460 quite

00:21:12.760 literally

00:21:13.260 life

00:21:14.500 and

00:21:14.720 death

00:21:14.960 was

00:21:15.240 extremely

00:21:15.800 exciting

00:21:16.260 and

00:21:16.620 everyone

00:21:17.500 wanted

00:21:17.800 to work

00:21:18.160 on it

00:21:18.960 designers

00:21:19.860 were throwing

00:21:20.400 themselves

00:21:20.780 into

00:21:21.000 the

00:21:21.160 volcano

00:21:21.520 and

00:21:22.400 I

00:21:23.240 ended

00:21:23.420 up

00:21:23.600 on

00:21:23.700 a

00:21:23.820 small

00:21:24.040 team

00:21:24.620 we

00:21:25.220 created

00:21:25.600 this

00:21:25.940 kickoff

00:21:26.380 meeting

00:21:26.880 to

00:21:27.760 invite

00:21:28.240 BJ

00:21:28.580 in

00:21:29.480 where

00:21:30.560 we

00:21:30.760 actually

00:21:31.020 built

00:21:31.320 this

00:21:31.580 tunnel

00:21:32.080 that

00:21:32.560 led

00:21:33.020 from

00:21:33.340 our

00:21:33.600 office

00:21:34.040 entrance

00:21:34.560 on

00:21:34.860 the

00:21:35.000 pier

00:21:35.360 at

00:21:36.100 the

00:21:36.240 bay

00:21:36.520 in

00:21:36.740 San

00:21:36.900 Francisco

00:21:37.320 to

00:21:37.780 this

00:21:38.020 dome

00:21:38.360 like

00:21:38.600 structure

00:21:39.160 built

00:21:39.900 a

00:21:40.080 small

00:21:40.900 group

00:21:41.420 just

00:21:41.680 sitting

00:21:41.900 in

00:21:42.040 the

00:21:42.140 round

00:21:42.460 and

00:21:43.300 internally

00:21:44.000 that

00:21:44.320 meeting

00:21:44.620 space

00:21:44.920 became

00:21:45.300 known

00:21:45.620 as

00:21:45.820 the

00:21:46.100 death

00:21:46.340 yurt

00:21:46.720 and

00:21:47.880 on

00:21:48.420 that

00:21:48.680 first

00:21:49.160 day

00:21:49.720 when

00:21:50.060 we

00:21:50.200 met

00:21:50.420 BJ

00:21:50.760 we

00:21:51.860 led

00:21:52.180 him

00:21:52.400 in

00:21:52.720 through

00:21:52.900 this

00:21:53.100 liminal

00:21:53.880 tunnel

00:21:54.400 this

00:21:55.180 passageway

00:21:55.860 that

00:21:56.060 terminated

00:21:56.540 in

00:21:56.760 this

00:21:56.960 candlelit

00:21:57.460 dome

00:21:57.800 and

00:21:59.180 it

00:21:59.280 had

00:21:59.420 a

00:21:59.560 transparent

00:22:00.040 top

00:22:00.640 and

00:22:00.780 it

00:22:00.920 caught

00:22:01.140 the

00:22:01.340 flickering

00:22:01.800 shadows

00:22:02.300 of

00:22:02.620 the

00:22:02.820 candle

00:22:03.160 light

00:22:03.540 and

00:22:03.760 we

00:22:03.980 just

00:22:04.300 wanted

00:22:04.520 to

00:22:04.720 create

00:22:05.040 an

00:22:05.260 intimate

00:22:05.660 safe

00:22:06.340 inner

00:22:06.780 sanctum

00:22:07.260 for

00:22:07.540 this

00:22:07.740 conversation

00:22:08.340 there

00:22:09.600 were

00:22:09.700 10

00:22:09.880 of

00:22:10.000 us

00:22:10.140 there

00:22:10.480 and

00:22:11.120 our

00:22:11.420 assignment

00:22:11.800 was

00:22:12.040 to

00:22:12.180 come

00:22:12.360 ready

00:22:12.600 to

00:22:12.780 talk

00:22:13.040 about

00:22:13.300 how

00:22:13.580 we

00:22:13.900 design

00:22:14.460 our

00:22:14.680 final

00:22:15.100 moments

00:22:15.600 on

00:22:15.800 earth

00:22:16.080 so

00:22:17.180 we

00:22:17.660 started

00:22:18.100 going

00:22:18.540 around

00:22:18.820 the

00:22:19.020 room

00:22:19.320 and

00:22:20.100 each

00:22:20.520 person

00:22:21.100 painted

00:22:22.540 a

00:22:22.940 more

00:22:23.180 opulent

00:22:23.840 picture

00:22:24.580 than

00:22:24.920 the

00:22:25.080 last

00:22:25.500 of

00:22:25.720 what

00:22:26.040 their

00:22:26.240 final

00:22:26.560 moments

00:22:26.980 might

00:22:27.380 look

00:22:27.640 like

00:22:27.980 alone

00:22:29.180 at

00:22:29.460 the

00:22:29.560 top

00:22:29.780 of

00:22:29.920 a

00:22:30.080 mountain

00:22:30.400 or

00:22:30.940 being

00:22:31.260 surrounded

00:22:31.780 by

00:22:32.040 all

00:22:32.180 your

00:22:32.300 friends

00:22:32.680 and

00:22:32.860 family

00:22:33.260 but

00:22:33.760 in

00:22:33.900 a

00:22:34.040 forest

00:22:34.520 or

00:22:35.520 assembling

00:22:36.620 your

00:22:37.040 perfect

00:22:37.520 curated

00:22:38.140 death

00:22:38.640 playlist

00:22:39.440 and

00:22:41.160 I

00:22:42.200 remember

00:22:42.500 I was

00:22:42.820 dreading

00:22:43.220 my

00:22:43.440 turn

00:22:43.800 because

00:22:44.180 I

00:22:44.700 was

00:22:45.040 fresh

00:22:45.460 off

00:22:45.700 of

00:22:45.820 my

00:22:46.000 father's

00:22:46.500 death

00:22:46.820 just

00:22:47.060 three

00:22:47.280 months

00:22:47.500 before

00:22:47.940 and

00:22:48.200 I

00:22:48.320 just

00:22:48.860 started

00:22:49.220 at

00:22:49.440 IDO

00:22:49.980 and

00:22:51.040 I

00:22:51.140 wanted

00:22:51.380 to

00:22:51.620 join

00:22:51.920 this

00:22:52.140 rapture

00:22:52.940 but

00:22:53.740 I

00:22:54.320 witnessed

00:22:55.060 my

00:22:55.640 father's

00:22:56.100 death

00:22:56.340 as

00:22:56.620 something

00:22:57.040 so

00:22:57.620 quiet

00:22:58.900 and

00:22:59.380 something

00:23:00.000 that

00:23:00.220 didn't

00:23:00.500 remotely

00:23:01.000 resemble

00:23:01.560 any

00:23:01.860 of

00:23:02.000 these

00:23:02.200 lofty

00:23:02.640 visions

00:23:02.960 I

00:23:03.240 mean

00:23:03.340 my

00:23:03.520 father

00:23:03.840 suffered

00:23:04.700 with

00:23:04.920 dementia

00:23:05.360 and

00:23:05.940 depression

00:23:06.480 for

00:23:06.880 many

00:23:07.080 years

00:23:07.560 and

00:23:08.400 he

00:23:08.540 did

00:23:08.700 not

00:23:08.940 have

00:23:09.140 an

00:23:09.260 easy

00:23:09.520 death

00:23:10.020 and

00:23:10.680 by

00:23:10.820 the

00:23:10.980 time

00:23:11.160 we

00:23:11.280 got

00:23:11.460 him

00:23:11.600 on

00:23:11.720 hospice

00:23:12.300 he

00:23:12.520 was

00:23:14.080 mostly

00:23:14.440 unconscious

00:23:14.940 he

00:23:15.580 hadn't

00:23:16.160 uttered

00:23:16.520 an

00:23:16.640 intelligible

00:23:17.200 word

00:23:17.680 for

00:23:17.920 a

00:23:18.100 year

00:23:18.400 and

00:23:19.520 my

00:23:19.720 last

00:23:19.960 moments

00:23:20.240 with

00:23:20.520 him

00:23:20.780 were

00:23:21.120 you

00:23:21.640 know

00:23:21.860 as

00:23:22.960 I

00:23:23.940 would

00:23:24.100 imagine

00:23:24.980 many

00:23:25.360 last

00:23:25.740 moments

00:23:26.160 with

00:23:26.400 loved

00:23:26.620 ones

00:23:26.900 are

00:23:27.100 just

00:23:27.320 very

00:23:27.600 quietly

00:23:28.080 by

00:23:29.140 the

00:23:29.280 bedside

00:23:29.740 stroking

00:23:30.180 his

00:23:30.380 forehead

00:23:30.760 and

00:23:31.220 wetting

00:23:31.800 his

00:23:32.020 lips

00:23:32.300 with

00:23:32.480 a

00:23:32.640 sponge

00:23:33.020 and

00:23:33.520 whispering

00:23:33.980 that

00:23:34.200 I

00:23:34.340 loved

00:23:34.600 him

00:23:34.960 and

00:23:35.280 scrambling

00:23:36.620 to find

00:23:37.180 a

00:23:37.480 CD

00:23:38.380 of

00:23:38.700 Yiddish

00:23:39.020 music

00:23:39.720 because

00:23:40.240 I

00:23:40.480 knew

00:23:40.640 those

00:23:40.940 were

00:23:41.120 the

00:23:41.360 beloved

00:23:41.720 songs

00:23:42.160 of his

00:23:42.480 childhood

00:23:42.840 and

00:23:43.680 that

00:23:43.880 hearing

00:23:44.480 is the

00:23:44.880 last

00:23:45.160 sense

00:23:45.520 that

00:23:45.820 you

00:23:46.220 lose

00:23:46.760 hoping

00:23:47.180 that

00:23:47.400 he

00:23:47.500 would

00:23:47.660 hear

00:23:47.860 that

00:23:48.180 so

00:23:49.300 anyway

00:23:49.500 I

00:23:49.620 was

00:23:51.640 with

00:23:51.880 this

00:23:52.160 exercise

00:23:52.640 that

00:23:52.940 we

00:23:53.060 designed

00:23:53.440 for

00:23:53.660 kicking

00:23:53.940 off

00:23:54.180 this

00:23:54.360 work

00:23:54.660 with

00:23:54.840 BJ

00:23:55.180 and

00:23:55.500 the

00:23:55.640 Zen

00:23:55.760 Hospice

00:23:56.320 but

00:23:57.060 my

00:23:57.500 father's

00:23:58.060 experience

00:23:58.480 felt so

00:23:59.100 undesigned

00:23:59.840 and so

00:24:00.260 over

00:24:00.720 medicalized

00:24:01.580 and in

00:24:02.260 many ways

00:24:02.800 quite

00:24:03.420 inhumane

00:24:04.180 and so

00:24:05.120 when my

00:24:05.460 turn

00:24:05.800 came

00:24:06.120 I

00:24:06.280 just

00:24:06.480 said

00:24:07.120 as

00:24:07.320 much

00:24:07.620 and

00:24:07.780 I

00:24:07.980 broke

00:24:08.360 into

00:24:08.600 tears

00:24:09.000 and I

00:24:09.320 remember

00:24:09.680 BJ

00:24:10.040 was

00:24:10.320 sitting

00:24:10.600 across

00:24:11.000 the

00:24:11.240 room

00:24:11.420 from

00:24:11.660 me

00:24:11.940 and

00:24:12.860 locked

00:24:13.200 eyes

00:24:13.620 with

00:24:13.900 me

00:24:14.280 and

00:24:15.600 I

00:24:15.760 knew

00:24:16.080 that

00:24:16.480 he

00:24:16.720 understood

00:24:17.260 as a

00:24:18.520 palliative

00:24:18.820 care

00:24:19.060 physician

00:24:19.440 whose

00:24:20.160 work

00:24:20.520 is to

00:24:20.860 usher

00:24:21.160 people

00:24:21.560 through

00:24:21.860 this

00:24:22.140 human

00:24:22.500 condition

00:24:23.080 of

00:24:23.700 suffering

00:24:24.360 he

00:24:25.340 knew

00:24:26.020 that

00:24:26.520 that's

00:24:27.740 what

00:24:27.940 death

00:24:28.200 looks

00:24:28.480 like

00:24:28.760 and

00:24:28.880 it

00:24:29.040 looks

00:24:29.340 nothing

00:24:29.680 like

00:24:29.980 what

00:24:30.180 we

00:24:30.340 see

00:24:30.520 on

00:24:30.700 TV

00:24:30.960 and

00:24:31.320 it

00:24:31.640 often

00:24:33.180 happens

00:24:33.600 in an

00:24:33.880 ICU

00:24:34.280 and

00:24:34.820 in a

00:24:35.420 clinical

00:24:35.940 setting

00:24:36.420 so

00:24:37.420 anyway

00:24:37.660 I came

00:24:38.080 to

00:24:38.220 understand

00:24:38.640 that

00:24:38.880 designing

00:24:39.260 one's

00:24:39.600 life

00:24:39.900 and

00:24:40.160 death

00:24:40.440 doesn't

00:24:41.280 mean

00:24:41.420 that

00:24:41.540 you

00:24:41.640 can

00:24:41.800 really

00:24:42.020 control

00:24:42.420 it

00:24:42.620 it

00:24:42.740 means

00:24:42.940 that

00:24:43.060 you

00:24:43.160 can

00:24:43.300 come

00:24:43.500 up

00:24:43.680 with

00:24:43.840 some

00:24:44.080 principles

00:24:44.680 for

00:24:45.540 how

00:24:45.920 to

00:24:46.040 be

00:24:46.180 true

00:24:46.440 to

00:24:46.600 how

00:24:46.740 you

00:24:46.880 want

00:24:47.040 to

00:24:47.160 live

00:24:47.500 well

00:24:49.100 so

00:24:49.260 you've

00:24:49.620 introduced

00:24:49.920 a couple

00:24:50.460 of

00:24:50.900 terms

00:24:52.240 here

00:24:52.600 and

00:24:53.640 also

00:24:53.920 a

00:24:54.340 stigma

00:24:55.520 associated

00:24:56.120 with

00:24:56.460 one

00:24:56.860 of

00:24:56.980 them

00:24:57.100 perhaps

00:24:57.360 we

00:24:57.520 can

00:24:57.760 explain

00:24:59.000 this

00:25:00.080 state

00:25:00.760 of

00:25:00.860 affairs

00:25:01.160 so

00:25:01.560 BJ

00:25:02.380 can

00:25:02.600 you

00:25:02.720 differentiate

00:25:03.140 palliative

00:25:04.160 care

00:25:04.520 from

00:25:04.900 hospice

00:25:05.620 and

00:25:06.420 either

00:25:07.300 one

00:25:07.480 of

00:25:07.580 you

00:25:07.680 can

00:25:07.880 tell

00:25:08.720 us

00:25:08.880 why

00:25:09.360 there

00:25:10.060 is

00:25:10.260 such

00:25:10.480 a

00:25:10.740 gravity

00:25:11.820 to

00:25:12.480 invoking

00:25:13.640 hospice

00:25:14.600 care

00:25:14.900 and

00:25:15.440 you

00:25:16.140 know

00:25:16.260 how

00:25:16.460 we

00:25:16.920 should

00:25:17.140 think

00:25:17.640 about

00:25:17.840 that

00:25:18.120 yeah

00:25:18.820 sure

00:25:19.380 and

00:25:19.900 shosh

00:25:20.120 maybe

00:25:20.340 I'll

00:25:21.180 define

00:25:21.580 some

00:25:21.780 of

00:25:21.820 these

00:25:21.960 things

00:25:22.240 and

00:25:22.520 yeah

00:25:23.060 I'll

00:25:23.260 leave

00:25:23.400 it

00:25:23.520 to

00:25:23.640 you

00:25:23.740 to

00:25:23.880 help

00:25:24.960 us

00:25:25.220 understand

00:25:25.700 how

00:25:25.940 they

00:25:26.100 land

00:25:26.420 with

00:25:26.600 the

00:25:26.760 public

00:25:27.140 we've

00:25:27.580 been

00:25:27.740 wrestling

00:25:28.560 with

00:25:28.860 I mean

00:25:29.180 palliative

00:25:31.060 care

00:25:31.360 it gets

00:25:32.360 so

00:25:32.840 confusing

00:25:33.640 Sam

00:25:34.140 and I

00:25:34.340 really

00:25:34.480 appreciate

00:25:34.880 your

00:25:35.080 question

00:25:35.480 I mean

00:25:35.740 people

00:25:36.060 within

00:25:36.440 medicine

00:25:36.820 get

00:25:37.100 confused

00:25:37.560 about

00:25:37.820 what

00:25:38.000 the heck

00:25:38.260 palliative

00:25:38.580 care

00:25:38.860 is

00:25:39.080 so

00:25:39.260 it's

00:25:39.480 really

00:25:39.740 important

00:25:40.660 so

00:25:41.840 hospice

00:25:43.320 came

00:25:43.680 first

00:25:44.080 it's

00:25:44.300 an

00:25:44.440 ancient

00:25:44.720 idea

00:25:45.220 really

00:25:45.980 took

00:25:46.260 off

00:25:46.560 in

00:25:46.760 modern

00:25:47.040 terms

00:25:47.420 in

00:25:47.580 the

00:25:47.720 UK

00:25:47.960 in

00:25:48.180 the

00:25:48.320 60s

00:25:48.780 came

00:25:49.040 to

00:25:49.180 the

00:25:49.320 US

00:25:49.660 in

00:25:49.840 the

00:25:50.040 70s

00:25:50.580 and

00:25:50.680 80s

00:25:51.180 as a

00:25:51.520 sort

00:25:51.840 of

00:25:51.920 a

00:25:52.040 non-medical

00:25:52.780 largely

00:25:53.220 volunteer

00:25:54.000 approach

00:25:54.940 to care

00:25:55.480 and it

00:25:56.260 was very

00:25:56.520 beautiful

00:25:56.940 and in

00:25:58.220 the 80s

00:25:58.840 Medicare

00:25:59.280 got in

00:25:59.740 the business

00:26:00.120 and started

00:26:00.560 paying for

00:26:01.120 it in a

00:26:01.400 novel

00:26:01.660 way

00:26:02.040 and you

00:26:03.180 tell me

00:26:03.580 Sam

00:26:03.780 we can

00:26:04.060 take

00:26:04.280 any

00:26:04.440 little

00:26:04.660 tributaries

00:26:05.260 on

00:26:05.480 policy

00:26:05.960 fronts

00:26:06.320 or

00:26:06.460 whatever

00:26:06.660 else

00:26:06.980 along

00:26:07.220 the way

00:26:07.500 here

00:26:07.700 but

00:26:07.980 since the

00:26:09.220 80s

00:26:09.700 hospice

00:26:10.280 became

00:26:10.840 an

00:26:11.180 insurance

00:26:11.680 benefit

00:26:12.200 so that's

00:26:13.160 how we

00:26:13.380 say

00:26:13.520 we're

00:26:13.740 on

00:26:14.060 hospice

00:26:14.640 we're

00:26:14.840 on

00:26:15.120 the

00:26:15.320 insurance

00:26:15.740 benefit

00:26:16.180 called

00:26:16.540 hospice

00:26:17.100 so it's

00:26:17.960 hospice

00:26:18.680 has many

00:26:19.900 meanings

00:26:20.400 but

00:26:20.760 it is

00:26:22.060 this

00:26:22.260 kind of

00:26:22.620 care

00:26:22.880 reserve

00:26:23.220 for the

00:26:23.580 final

00:26:23.880 six

00:26:24.340 months

00:26:24.660 or a

00:26:25.000 year

00:26:25.220 of

00:26:25.400 life

00:26:25.700 say

00:26:26.000 but

00:26:26.600 into

00:26:26.820 the

00:26:27.020 80s

00:26:27.360 and

00:26:27.480 90s

00:26:28.820 people

00:26:29.460 who did

00:26:29.740 this

00:26:29.920 kind

00:26:30.160 of

00:26:30.240 work

00:26:30.480 one way

00:26:30.800 and

00:26:30.860 another

00:26:31.120 would

00:26:31.360 kind

00:26:31.600 of

00:26:31.680 realize

00:26:31.900 well

00:26:32.040 why

00:26:32.280 are we

00:26:32.960 waiting

00:26:33.360 till

00:26:33.860 the

00:26:34.200 end

00:26:34.680 of

00:26:34.880 people's

00:26:35.400 lives

00:26:35.840 to

00:26:36.220 listen

00:26:36.640 to

00:26:36.900 them

00:26:37.200 to

00:26:38.020 defer

00:26:38.400 to

00:26:38.560 their

00:26:38.780 experience

00:26:39.500 to

00:26:40.340 honor

00:26:40.600 them

00:26:40.940 to

00:26:41.300 tend

00:26:41.600 to

00:26:41.740 their

00:26:41.900 comfort

00:26:42.300 to

00:26:42.520 their

00:26:42.700 peace

00:26:43.160 help

00:26:43.820 them

00:26:44.040 make

00:26:44.300 meaning

00:26:44.800 deal

00:26:45.600 with

00:26:45.800 meaninglessness

00:26:46.540 you know

00:26:47.620 help

00:26:47.820 the

00:26:48.040 families

00:26:48.640 reckon

00:26:49.060 and square

00:26:49.740 what's

00:26:50.080 going

00:26:50.300 on

00:26:50.680 and

00:26:50.940 live

00:26:51.220 on

00:26:51.720 you know

00:26:52.780 it's

00:26:52.880 beautiful

00:26:53.400 beautiful

00:26:53.860 stuff

00:26:54.340 but it

00:26:54.700 was

00:26:54.960 we

00:26:55.500 reserved

00:26:55.880 it

00:26:56.000 for the

00:26:56.240 final

00:26:56.460 six

00:26:56.760 months

00:26:57.020 or

00:26:57.200 less

00:26:57.380 to

00:26:57.580 live

00:26:57.920 you

00:26:58.080 know

00:26:58.180 so

00:26:58.420 in

00:26:58.540 the

00:26:58.660 90s

00:26:59.200 the

00:27:00.900 idea

00:27:01.620 was

00:27:02.020 to try

00:27:02.320 to break

00:27:04.880 nation

00:27:05.240 which

00:27:05.520 is

00:27:05.660 the

00:27:05.820 thing

00:27:06.000 that

00:27:06.160 said

00:27:06.380 six

00:27:06.660 months

00:27:06.900 or

00:27:07.060 less

00:27:07.220 to

00:27:07.400 live

00:27:07.840 and

00:27:08.000 you

00:27:08.100 got

00:27:08.240 to

00:27:08.380 give

00:27:08.600 up

00:27:08.800 certain

00:27:09.080 kinds

00:27:09.380 of

00:27:09.500 care

00:27:09.680 to

00:27:09.860 go

00:27:10.060 on

00:27:10.340 to

00:27:10.460 hospice

00:27:11.000 all

00:27:11.600 these

00:27:11.740 kind

00:27:11.920 of

00:27:12.020 invented

00:27:12.480 hurdles

00:27:13.640 man-made

00:27:14.740 and so

00:27:15.840 in the

00:27:16.040 90s

00:27:16.400 the field

00:27:16.800 of

00:27:16.940 care

00:27:17.500 grew up

00:27:18.000 the

00:27:18.640 term

00:27:18.880 was

00:27:19.060 coined

00:27:19.360 by

00:27:19.620 Balfour

00:27:20.020 Mount

00:27:20.300 in

00:27:20.520 Canada

00:27:20.840 who

00:27:21.000 was

00:27:21.080 one

00:27:21.200 of

00:27:21.240 the

00:27:21.360 first

00:27:21.580 hospice

00:27:22.040 docs

00:27:22.380 in

00:27:22.600 North

00:27:23.140 America

00:27:23.560 and

00:27:23.940 we

00:27:24.340 were

00:27:24.460 trying

00:27:24.640 to

00:27:24.800 evade

00:27:25.500 the

00:27:25.720 baggage

00:27:34.880 you

00:27:35.220 die

00:27:35.460 it's

00:27:35.640 not

00:27:35.800 about

00:27:36.100 celebrating

00:27:36.860 death

00:27:37.300 per se

00:27:37.920 it's

00:27:38.800 really

00:27:39.000 about

00:27:39.280 celebrating

00:27:39.780 life

00:27:40.140 and

00:27:40.300 eking

00:27:40.580 out

00:27:40.840 all

00:27:41.020 that

00:27:41.180 you

00:27:41.300 can

00:27:41.560 while

00:27:41.760 you

00:27:41.940 can

00:27:42.280 so

00:27:43.380 out

00:27:43.820 of

00:27:43.920 care

00:27:44.060 grew

00:27:44.280 up

00:27:44.500 in

00:27:44.660 the

00:27:44.800 90s

00:27:45.260 as

00:27:45.420 a

00:27:45.540 field

00:27:45.820 to

00:27:46.340 say

00:27:46.600 no

00:27:47.240 no

00:27:47.420 our

00:27:47.660 work

00:27:47.960 here

00:27:48.200 is

00:27:48.380 multiple

00:27:49.100 disciplines

00:27:49.880 coming

00:27:50.340 together

00:27:50.860 to

00:27:52.340 you know

00:27:53.300 mitigate

00:27:53.720 suffering

00:27:54.340 essentially

00:27:54.880 to

00:27:55.520 focus

00:27:55.980 on the

00:27:56.340 experience

00:27:57.000 of

00:27:57.220 illness

00:27:57.600 not

00:27:57.960 the

00:27:58.100 transactions

00:27:58.760 of

00:27:59.200 disease

00:27:59.660 management

00:28:00.220 to

00:28:01.020 help

00:28:01.340 you

00:28:01.460 suffer

00:28:01.720 less

00:28:02.100 and

00:28:02.320 help

00:28:02.600 you

00:28:02.780 realize

00:28:03.720 more

00:28:04.040 joy

00:28:04.420 that's

00:28:05.440 kind

00:28:05.660 of

00:28:05.740 the

00:28:05.880 gist

00:28:06.300 so

00:28:07.180 palliative

00:28:07.680 care

00:28:07.940 is

00:28:08.200 this

00:28:08.400 now

00:28:08.600 the

00:28:08.760 umbrella

00:28:09.140 term

00:28:09.600 since

00:28:10.020 2006

00:28:11.020 the

00:28:11.960 field

00:28:12.240 at

00:28:12.420 large

00:28:12.900 is

00:28:13.320 palliative

00:28:13.660 care

00:28:14.160 hospice

00:28:15.400 now

00:28:15.620 is

00:28:15.780 considered

00:28:16.400 a

00:28:16.660 subset

00:28:17.040 of

00:28:17.300 palliative

00:28:17.620 care

00:28:17.900 that is

00:28:18.280 this

00:28:18.500 kind

00:28:18.820 of

00:28:18.980 multidiscipline

00:28:19.720 work

00:28:20.060 but

00:28:20.720 still

00:28:21.020 reserved

00:28:21.420 for the

00:28:21.740 final

00:28:21.980 months

00:28:22.320 of

00:28:22.480 life

00:28:22.820 whereas

00:28:23.980 in

00:28:24.260 palliative

00:28:24.560 care

00:28:24.920 it's

00:28:25.600 the

00:28:25.720 same

00:28:25.920 training

00:28:26.440 you're

00:28:27.900 a

00:28:28.000 hospice

00:28:28.380 doc

00:28:28.660 as

00:28:28.860 well

00:28:29.000 as

00:28:29.120 a

00:28:29.220 palliative

00:28:32.600 people

00:28:32.780 for

00:28:32.980 many

00:28:33.180 years

00:28:33.720 or

00:28:34.100 people

00:28:34.380 who

00:28:34.540 are

00:28:34.620 in

00:28:34.680 remission

00:28:35.080 who

00:28:35.300 aren't

00:28:35.500 dying

00:28:35.760 anytime

00:28:36.180 soon

00:28:36.560 so

00:28:37.600 sorry

00:28:38.140 for the

00:28:38.460 long

00:28:38.640 answer

00:28:38.960 brother

00:28:39.240 but

00:28:39.480 that's

00:28:39.900 kind

00:28:40.180 of

00:28:40.240 hard

00:28:40.360 to

00:28:40.480 do

00:28:40.580 it

00:28:40.740 succinctly

00:28:41.320 that's

00:28:41.460 good

00:28:41.580 so

00:28:41.760 but

00:28:42.520 is

00:28:43.200 it

00:28:43.320 true

00:28:43.460 to

00:28:43.620 say

00:28:43.820 that

00:28:44.160 hospice

00:28:45.160 only

00:28:46.300 gets

00:28:46.760 triggered

00:28:47.280 once

00:28:48.200 you

00:28:48.700 admit

00:28:49.160 you

00:28:49.500 being

00:28:49.820 the

00:28:50.060 patient

00:28:50.580 the

00:28:50.800 family

00:28:51.220 in

00:28:52.160 concert

00:28:52.520 with

00:28:52.820 the

00:28:53.340 health

00:28:53.540 care

00:28:53.700 provider

00:28:54.080 that

00:28:55.200 you're

00:28:56.360 no

00:28:56.840 longer

00:28:57.120 doing

00:28:57.540 anything

00:28:57.980 to

00:28:59.200 fight

00:29:00.500 this

00:29:00.760 illness

00:29:01.180 and

00:29:02.600 overcome it

00:29:03.000 you're

00:29:03.140 not

00:29:03.340 deliberately

00:29:04.040 prolonging

00:29:04.740 life

00:29:05.120 at that

00:29:05.460 point

00:29:05.740 what

00:29:06.020 is it

00:29:06.580 that

00:29:06.740 you

00:29:07.000 are

00:29:08.000 no

00:29:08.220 longer

00:29:08.460 doing

00:29:08.860 in

00:29:09.380 order

00:29:09.560 to

00:29:09.860 invoke

00:29:10.620 hospice

00:29:11.140 so

00:29:11.820 that's

00:29:12.040 right

00:29:12.260 so

00:29:12.520 you're

00:29:12.720 pointing

00:29:12.940 to

00:29:13.160 the

00:29:13.300 two

00:29:13.580 main

00:29:14.080 stipulations

00:29:14.980 of

00:29:15.240 the

00:29:15.380 hospice

00:29:15.840 benefit

00:29:16.180 to

00:29:16.460 qualify

00:29:16.980 for

00:29:17.360 this

00:29:17.640 kind

00:29:17.940 of

00:29:18.100 care

00:29:18.440 to

00:29:18.980 be

00:29:19.160 paid

00:29:19.460 for

00:29:19.820 two

00:29:20.600 things

00:29:21.000 two

00:29:21.720 doctors

00:29:22.120 have

00:29:22.320 to

00:29:22.440 certify

00:29:22.960 that

00:29:23.200 your

00:29:23.460 death

00:29:24.040 will

00:29:24.220 likely

00:29:24.580 come

00:29:24.940 in

00:29:25.120 six

00:29:25.380 months

00:29:25.660 or

00:29:25.820 less

00:29:26.040 we're

00:29:27.400 pretty

00:29:27.940 bad

00:29:28.280 at

00:29:28.420 prognosis

00:29:28.920 so

00:29:29.200 it's

00:29:29.380 a

00:29:29.460 best

00:29:29.780 guess

00:29:30.140 and

00:29:31.000 the

00:29:31.140 second

00:29:31.380 stipulation

00:29:31.920 is

00:29:32.060 what

00:29:32.160 you're

00:29:32.280 pointing

00:29:32.480 to

00:29:32.700 is

00:29:32.860 you

00:29:32.980 have

00:29:33.240 to

00:29:34.380 essentially

00:29:35.240 stop

00:29:35.780 trying

00:29:36.580 to

00:29:37.000 combat

00:29:37.520 this

00:29:38.000 illness

00:29:38.520 so

00:29:39.640 if

00:29:39.900 you're

00:29:40.120 dying

00:29:40.540 from

00:29:41.000 say

00:29:41.380 heart

00:29:41.640 failure

00:29:42.020 if

00:29:42.660 that's

00:29:42.900 your

00:29:43.040 hospice

00:29:43.520 diagnosis

00:29:44.160 you

00:29:45.880 can

00:29:46.100 come

00:29:46.480 into

00:29:46.660 hospice

00:29:47.240 we

00:29:47.960 will

00:29:48.180 stop

00:29:48.640 a lot

00:29:49.000 of

00:29:49.100 these

00:29:49.240 expensive

00:29:49.740 heart

00:29:50.200 pumps

00:29:50.540 and

00:29:50.740 things

00:29:50.920 like

00:29:51.080 that

00:29:51.340 that

00:29:51.540 are

00:29:51.700 sustaining

00:29:52.960 your

00:29:53.220 life

00:29:53.600 or

00:29:54.360 trying

00:29:54.780 to

00:29:55.040 cure

00:29:55.460 or

00:29:55.720 reverse

00:29:56.240 the

00:29:56.840 heart

00:29:57.060 disease

00:29:57.600 that

00:29:58.720 care

00:29:59.040 then

00:29:59.280 goes

00:29:59.580 into

00:29:59.940 instead

00:30:00.380 making

00:30:00.740 sure

00:30:01.020 you're

00:30:01.180 comfortable

00:30:01.600 and

00:30:02.500 working

00:30:02.880 with

00:30:03.180 you

00:30:03.300 for

00:30:03.420 the

00:30:03.560 time

00:30:03.780 that

00:30:03.940 you

00:30:04.060 have

00:30:04.440 to

00:30:04.640 realize

00:30:05.060 certain

00:30:05.380 things

00:30:05.660 in

00:30:05.780 your

00:30:05.880 life

00:30:06.140 etc

00:30:06.420 becomes

00:30:06.800 much

00:30:07.100 more

00:30:07.340 social

00:30:07.900 much

00:30:09.100 more

00:30:09.320 supportive

00:30:09.820 in a

00:30:10.340 word

00:30:10.600 rather than

00:30:11.500 trying to

00:30:11.820 fight

00:30:12.080 the

00:30:12.240 disease

00:30:12.600 you're

00:30:12.800 trying

00:30:12.920 to

00:30:13.040 support

00:30:13.360 the

00:30:13.540 person

00:30:13.860 so

00:30:14.080 that's

00:30:14.320 the

00:30:14.440 kind

00:30:14.580 of

00:30:14.700 segue

00:30:14.980 of

00:30:15.320 care

00:30:15.700 your

00:30:16.340 other

00:30:16.600 diagnoses

00:30:17.220 if you

00:30:17.600 have

00:30:17.800 diabetes

00:30:18.340 and

00:30:18.640 any

00:30:18.800 other

00:30:18.960 thing

00:30:19.120 that

00:30:19.280 can

00:30:19.460 continue

00:30:19.840 to

00:30:20.000 be

00:30:20.160 treated

00:30:20.480 but

00:30:20.720 the

00:30:20.880 diagnosis

00:30:21.420 that

00:30:21.720 qualifies

00:30:22.240 you

00:30:22.360 for

00:30:22.460 hospice

00:30:22.940 you're

00:30:23.780 no

00:30:23.940 longer

00:30:24.420 qualified

00:30:25.140 to

00:30:25.440 push

00:30:25.740 back

00:30:26.100 on

00:30:26.300 that

00:30:26.500 disease

00:30:26.980 and

00:30:27.880 in

00:30:27.980 the

00:30:28.080 80s

00:30:28.380 that

00:30:28.520 made

00:30:28.680 a lot

00:30:28.880 of

00:30:29.000 sense

00:30:29.240 there

00:30:29.440 wasn't

00:30:29.740 by

00:30:30.040 the

00:30:30.200 time

00:30:30.420 you

00:30:30.600 reached

00:30:31.120 this

00:30:31.320 point

00:30:31.600 there

00:30:31.800 wasn't

00:30:32.060 much

00:30:32.280 more

00:30:32.520 to

00:30:32.680 try

00:30:33.040 to

00:30:33.360 beat

00:30:33.600 your

00:30:33.800 disease

00:30:34.300 or

00:30:34.940 by

00:30:35.100 then

00:30:35.280 the

00:30:35.440 person

00:30:35.760 was

00:30:35.920 really

00:30:36.080 not

00:30:36.300 interested

00:30:36.740 in

00:30:36.960 this

00:30:37.120 or

00:30:37.240 that

00:30:37.420 treatment

00:30:37.800 was

00:30:38.060 too

00:30:38.260 taxing

00:30:38.800 too

00:30:39.020 toxic

00:30:39.500 it's

00:30:40.340 getting

00:30:40.540 a little

00:30:40.820 messy

00:30:41.480 now

00:30:41.920 because

00:30:42.160 a lot

00:30:42.500 of

00:30:42.620 treatments

00:30:42.940 coming

00:30:43.260 down

00:30:43.420 the

00:30:43.560 pike

00:30:43.800 can

00:30:44.660 help

00:30:45.020 you

00:30:45.280 live

00:30:45.640 a little

00:30:45.900 bit

00:30:46.080 longer

00:30:46.420 a little

00:30:46.680 bit

00:30:46.840 more

00:30:47.040 comfortably

00:30:47.580 but

00:30:48.480 are

00:30:48.760 not

00:30:49.060 ever

00:30:49.360 intended

00:30:49.780 to

00:30:50.060 say

00:30:50.360 fix

00:30:50.820 or

00:30:51.020 cure

00:30:51.340 your

00:30:51.560 illness

00:30:52.000 so

00:30:52.540 there's

00:30:52.680 an

00:30:52.800 increasing

00:30:53.400 gray

00:30:54.260 zone

00:30:54.700 of

00:30:55.020 treatments

00:30:55.460 that

00:30:55.860 might

00:30:56.200 qualify

00:30:56.960 from a

00:30:57.640 palliative

00:30:58.000 point of

00:30:58.420 view

00:30:58.540 but

00:30:58.780 don't

00:30:59.160 from a

00:30:59.520 hospice

00:30:59.920 point of

00:31:00.280 view

00:31:00.360 for

00:31:00.520 these

00:31:00.720 reasons

00:31:01.020 so

00:31:01.260 it

00:31:07.240 giving

00:31:07.380 up

00:31:07.680 because

00:31:08.460 in

00:31:08.620 some

00:31:08.800 way

00:31:08.940 you

00:31:09.080 are

00:31:09.240 you're

00:31:09.460 giving

00:31:09.740 some

00:31:10.060 choices

00:31:10.440 up

00:31:10.780 does

00:31:11.360 that

00:31:11.480 make

00:31:11.640 sense

00:31:11.940 kind of

00:31:12.720 picture

00:31:12.940 that

00:31:13.180 so

00:31:13.540 the

00:31:13.700 question

00:31:14.160 I

00:31:14.380 posed

00:31:14.940 about

00:31:16.020 people's

00:31:17.280 hesitation

00:31:17.800 around

00:31:18.500 invoking

00:31:19.900 it

00:31:20.120 sort

00:31:20.520 of

00:31:20.660 answers

00:31:21.000 itself

00:31:21.500 because

00:31:21.800 it

00:31:22.440 comes

00:31:22.700 at

00:31:22.840 the

00:31:22.960 moment

00:31:23.180 where

00:31:23.360 you

00:31:23.460 have

00:31:23.640 to

00:31:23.780 admit

00:31:24.020 that

00:31:24.320 okay

00:31:24.780 you're

00:31:25.360 going

00:31:25.560 to

00:31:25.720 die

00:31:25.940 from

00:31:26.100 this

00:31:26.300 thing

00:31:26.580 and

00:31:27.140 it's

00:31:27.840 no

00:31:27.980 longer

00:31:28.260 a

00:31:28.940 story

00:31:29.220 of

00:31:29.440 how

00:31:29.640 you're

00:31:29.820 going

00:31:30.020 to

00:31:30.240 get

00:31:30.580 better

00:31:30.900 from

00:31:31.320 the

00:31:31.840 cancer

00:31:32.160 whatever

00:31:32.480 it

00:31:32.660 is

00:31:32.840 that's

00:31:33.320 right

00:31:33.520 Shoshana

00:31:34.340 did you

00:31:34.600 have

00:31:34.700 something

00:31:34.880 you

00:31:35.020 wanted

00:31:35.180 to

00:31:35.300 say

00:31:35.440 there

00:31:35.600 well

00:31:36.280 I

00:31:36.480 just

00:31:36.700 I

00:31:37.180 always

00:31:37.900 look

00:31:38.980 at

00:31:39.140 the

00:31:39.300 kind

00:31:39.520 of

00:31:40.280 etymology

00:31:40.960 of

00:31:41.180 these

00:31:41.380 things

00:31:41.680 hospice

00:31:42.320 and

00:31:42.520 hospitals

00:31:43.120 and

00:31:43.720 hospitality

00:31:44.560 you know

00:31:45.340 it's

00:31:46.020 all

00:31:46.600 about

00:31:47.180 caregiving

00:31:48.520 and

00:31:49.320 how

00:31:50.500 we

00:31:50.800 care

00:31:51.160 for

00:31:51.400 people

00:31:51.920 how

00:31:52.440 we

00:31:52.600 care

00:31:52.780 for

00:31:52.980 each

00:31:53.180 other

00:31:53.620 you know

00:31:54.680 through

00:31:54.860 the

00:31:55.060 entire

00:31:55.400 arc

00:31:55.700 of

00:31:55.880 life

00:31:56.260 and

00:31:56.860 we

00:31:57.620 pay

00:31:57.880 a lot

00:31:58.440 of

00:31:58.560 attention

00:31:58.920 for

00:31:59.240 how

00:31:59.540 we

00:31:59.880 care

00:32:00.660 for

00:32:01.220 our

00:32:02.140 firstborn

00:32:02.820 for

00:32:03.140 how

00:32:03.360 we

00:32:03.540 care

00:32:03.820 for

00:32:04.220 children

00:32:05.040 and

00:32:06.080 very

00:32:06.340 little

00:32:06.780 for

00:32:07.480 how

00:32:07.880 we

00:32:08.300 usher

00:32:09.460 people

00:32:09.720 out

00:32:09.980 of

00:32:10.120 life

00:32:10.460 and

00:32:11.520 you

00:32:11.800 know

00:32:11.940 part

00:32:12.420 of

00:32:12.600 the

00:32:12.900 project

00:32:13.200 of

00:32:13.380 this

00:32:13.560 book

00:32:13.800 was

00:32:14.240 knowing

00:32:14.920 that

00:32:15.260 there

00:32:15.500 was

00:32:15.640 this

00:32:15.880 book

00:32:16.180 what

00:32:16.540 to

00:32:16.700 expect

00:32:17.080 when

00:32:17.260 you're

00:32:17.380 expecting

00:32:17.840 for

00:32:18.120 new

00:32:18.280 parents

00:32:18.740 which

00:32:19.020 has

00:32:19.180 sold

00:32:19.400 500

00:32:20.140 million

00:32:20.600 copies

00:32:21.040 and

00:32:21.340 every

00:32:21.840 set

00:32:23.180 of

00:32:23.340 parents

00:32:23.680 gets

00:32:23.980 their

00:32:24.240 newly

00:32:24.740 minted

00:32:25.120 copy

00:32:25.500 we

00:32:26.380 wanted

00:32:26.660 to

00:32:26.860 create

00:32:27.080 something

00:32:27.380 like

00:32:27.680 that

00:32:28.100 a

00:32:28.360 stepwise

00:32:28.800 approach

00:32:29.300 to

00:32:29.760 thinking

00:32:30.260 about

00:32:30.680 this

00:32:30.900 experience

00:32:31.480 for

00:32:31.760 the

00:32:31.940 other

00:32:32.180 end

00:32:32.360 of

00:32:32.500 life

00:32:32.840 and

00:32:33.780 hospice

00:32:34.580 is a

00:32:34.840 part

00:32:34.980 of

00:32:35.080 that

00:32:35.280 yeah

00:32:36.160 so

00:32:37.140 you

00:32:37.280 mentioned

00:32:37.680 BJ

00:32:38.300 that

00:32:38.520 you

00:32:38.820 were

00:32:39.640 at

00:32:39.820 the

00:32:40.140 zen

00:32:40.680 hospice

00:32:41.520 does

00:32:42.160 that

00:32:42.360 suggest

00:32:42.840 that

00:32:42.980 you

00:32:43.120 were

00:32:43.880 you

00:32:44.300 a

00:32:44.420 zen

00:32:44.680 practitioner

00:32:45.300 before

00:32:45.780 you

00:32:46.520 came

00:32:46.760 to

00:32:46.940 it

00:32:47.040 or

00:32:47.160 did

00:32:47.700 you

00:32:47.780 just

00:32:47.980 come

00:32:48.340 as

00:32:48.600 a

00:32:48.720 hospice

00:32:49.080 doctor

00:32:49.500 who

00:32:49.880 happened

00:32:50.320 to

00:32:50.480 land

00:32:50.800 at

00:32:51.000 that

00:32:51.260 particular

00:32:52.200 hospice

00:32:52.680 well

00:32:53.620 I

00:32:53.800 came

00:32:54.120 there

00:32:54.520 more

00:32:55.080 more

00:32:55.520 the

00:32:55.720 latter

00:32:56.060 Sam

00:32:56.520 I

00:32:56.760 came

00:32:57.500 there

00:32:58.000 for

00:32:59.440 entranced

00:33:00.960 by

00:33:01.160 two

00:33:01.400 things

00:33:01.840 at

00:33:02.200 Zen

00:33:02.360 Hospice

00:33:02.660 Project

00:33:02.920 which

00:33:03.160 had

00:33:03.280 started

00:33:03.620 in

00:33:03.840 1987

00:33:04.460 and

00:33:04.820 I

00:33:04.900 know

00:33:05.000 you've

00:33:05.200 had

00:33:05.320 a

00:33:05.480 beautiful

00:33:05.800 interview

00:33:06.100 with

00:33:06.320 Frank

00:33:06.620 Osseseski

00:33:07.260 who

00:33:07.700 was

00:33:07.900 the

00:33:08.060 founding

00:33:08.340 executive

00:33:08.840 director

00:33:09.260 back

00:33:09.580 in

00:33:09.700 the

00:33:09.820 80s

00:33:10.260 I

00:33:11.140 mean

00:33:11.220 a

00:33:11.360 really

00:33:11.540 remarkable

00:33:12.140 little

00:33:12.800 place

00:33:13.220 and

00:33:13.880 it

00:33:14.000 had

00:33:14.160 closed

00:33:14.540 down

00:33:14.880 after

00:33:15.160 Frank

00:33:15.460 left

00:33:15.720 and

00:33:15.860 it

00:33:15.940 was

00:33:16.060 just

00:33:16.300 reopening

00:33:16.840 so

00:33:17.980 I

00:33:18.200 came

00:33:18.500 there

00:33:18.900 as

00:33:19.300 a

00:33:19.420 hospice

00:33:19.800 doctor

00:33:20.160 as

00:33:20.540 an

00:33:20.680 agnostic

00:33:21.260 hospice

00:33:22.040 doctor

00:33:22.380 who

00:33:22.680 was

00:33:22.820 broadly

00:33:23.200 interested

00:33:23.820 in

00:33:24.580 spirituality

00:33:25.120 or

00:33:26.480 just

00:33:26.780 philosophy

00:33:27.580 how we

00:33:28.240 approach

00:33:28.700 the truth

00:33:29.320 how we

00:33:29.660 approach

00:33:30.040 life

00:33:30.480 so I

00:33:31.380 was

00:33:31.540 interested

00:33:32.440 in

00:33:32.740 Buddhism

00:33:33.040 and

00:33:33.460 had

00:33:33.760 studied

00:33:34.220 it

00:33:34.380 a little

00:33:34.660 bit

00:33:34.940 and

00:33:35.120 found

00:33:35.440 it

00:33:35.700 irrefutable

00:33:38.180 in

00:33:39.060 so

00:33:39.260 many

00:33:39.480 ways

00:33:39.860 didn't

00:33:40.580 really

00:33:40.760 see it

00:33:41.020 as a

00:33:41.220 religion

00:33:41.560 but

00:33:41.860 more

00:33:42.180 as a

00:33:42.520 philosophy

00:33:43.100 and

00:33:44.240 my

00:33:44.540 agnosticism

00:33:45.280 fit

00:33:45.580 I thought

00:33:46.220 pretty

00:33:46.520 snugly

00:33:47.020 within

00:33:47.360 those

00:33:47.680 confines

00:33:48.360 but I

00:33:49.020 was

00:33:49.160 really

00:33:49.320 there

00:33:49.720 as

00:33:50.060 a

00:33:50.160 hospice

00:33:50.520 doc

00:33:50.780 who

00:33:51.020 loved

00:33:53.880 architecture

00:33:54.600 and this

00:33:55.600 sweet

00:33:55.980 little

00:33:56.240 guest

00:33:56.560 house

00:33:56.940 this

00:33:57.180 Victorian

00:33:57.660 was

00:33:57.980 anything

00:33:58.540 but a

00:33:59.160 nursing

00:33:59.440 anything

00:33:59.800 but a

00:34:00.300 hospital

00:34:00.700 and

00:34:01.040 there

00:34:02.060 was

00:34:02.160 a

00:34:02.280 belief

00:34:03.200 or

00:34:03.540 an

00:34:04.220 observation

00:34:04.820 that

00:34:05.340 bones

00:34:06.440 of a

00:34:06.780 place

00:34:07.160 the

00:34:07.700 inanimate

00:34:08.280 objects

00:34:08.840 the

00:34:09.200 design

00:34:09.800 all of

00:34:10.360 that

00:34:10.580 could

00:34:10.820 affect

00:34:11.180 the

00:34:11.340 experience

00:34:11.920 of course

00:34:12.660 it

00:34:12.820 can

00:34:13.040 the

00:34:13.340 beauty

00:34:13.600 of a

00:34:13.880 place

00:34:14.140 of course

00:34:14.500 it

00:34:14.660 can

00:34:14.880 so

00:34:15.140 I

00:34:15.900 was

00:34:16.060 there

00:34:16.220 for

00:34:16.380 the

00:34:16.560 house

00:34:16.960 and

00:34:17.320 I

00:34:17.480 was

00:34:17.660 there

00:34:18.000 because

00:34:18.540 they

00:34:18.800 had

00:34:19.020 a

00:34:19.180 basis

00:34:19.500 of

00:34:19.820 care

00:34:20.320 in

00:34:21.140 volunteerism

00:34:22.000 and in

00:34:22.420 spirituality

00:34:22.940 and that

00:34:23.840 seemed

00:34:24.080 like a

00:34:24.580 very

00:34:25.140 interesting

00:34:25.740 perhaps

00:34:26.400 a

00:34:26.640 larger

00:34:27.100 better

00:34:28.020 catchment

00:34:28.880 for this

00:34:29.300 subject

00:34:29.660 than the

00:34:30.260 sort

00:34:30.440 of

00:34:30.560 reductive

00:34:31.240 medical

00:34:31.800 model

00:34:32.740 per se

00:34:33.660 Shoshana

00:34:35.180 do you

00:34:35.580 have a

00:34:35.840 background

00:34:36.140 in

00:34:36.480 meditation

00:34:37.180 or any

00:34:37.760 spiritual

00:34:38.720 practice

00:34:39.220 that's

00:34:39.660 informing

00:34:40.060 your

00:34:40.280 approach

00:34:40.560 to this

00:34:40.900 well

00:34:41.420 Sam

00:34:41.700 I

00:34:41.880 largely

00:34:42.700 learned

00:34:43.060 to

00:34:43.220 meditate

00:34:43.500 from

00:34:43.860 you

00:34:44.140 I

00:34:44.620 have to

00:34:45.640 give you

00:34:46.020 credit

00:34:46.380 here

00:34:46.740 someone

00:34:48.580 gifted

00:34:49.080 me

00:34:49.640 a

00:34:50.180 subscription

00:34:51.100 to

00:34:51.720 waking

00:34:52.120 up

00:34:52.500 and

00:34:52.800 you

00:34:53.740 you know

00:34:54.800 I had

00:34:55.120 dabbled

00:34:55.660 in

00:34:56.040 meditation

00:34:56.500 before

00:34:57.040 and

00:34:57.440 growing up

00:34:58.220 in the

00:34:58.440 Bay Area

00:34:58.780 you can't

00:34:59.280 help but

00:34:59.740 like

00:35:00.020 osmotically

00:35:00.760 be exposed

00:35:01.380 to

00:35:01.960 all of

00:35:02.920 the

00:35:03.280 Buddhist

00:35:04.620 activity

00:35:06.180 around

00:35:06.580 here

00:35:06.900 and you

00:35:07.340 know

00:35:07.440 we have

00:35:08.000 spirit

00:35:08.780 rock

00:35:09.100 here

00:35:09.440 and

00:35:09.720 so I

00:35:11.000 had

00:35:11.200 a yoga

00:35:12.500 practice

00:35:12.920 and certainly

00:35:13.540 I was

00:35:13.860 interested

00:35:14.240 but really

00:35:14.900 it wasn't

00:35:15.400 until I

00:35:15.940 started

00:35:16.420 having you

00:35:17.820 in my

00:35:18.120 ear

00:35:18.300 that I

00:35:18.660 started

00:35:19.140 more

00:35:19.740 religiously

00:35:21.220 meditating

00:35:22.280 but I

00:35:23.080 just say

00:35:23.520 that

00:35:23.800 for me

00:35:25.460 the death

00:35:26.420 of my

00:35:26.660 father

00:35:26.920 was such

00:35:27.480 a

00:35:28.900 tectonic

00:35:29.700 shift

00:35:30.540 for me

00:35:31.100 and it

00:35:32.280 so rattled

00:35:33.040 me to

00:35:33.420 the core

00:35:33.920 that

00:35:34.260 I did

00:35:35.660 turn to

00:35:36.640 various

00:35:38.040 different

00:35:38.640 spiritual

00:35:39.800 guides

00:35:40.820 and

00:35:41.520 faiths

00:35:42.580 I

00:35:42.740 certainly

00:35:43.780 turned

00:35:44.160 back

00:35:44.480 to

00:35:44.780 my

00:35:45.040 Jewish

00:35:45.280 community

00:35:45.680 and I

00:35:46.140 listened

00:35:46.920 to

00:35:47.380 a lot

00:35:47.980 of

00:35:48.500 you

00:35:49.120 know

00:35:49.240 very

00:35:49.580 wise

00:35:50.060 teachers

00:35:50.560 who

00:35:51.980 grapple

00:35:52.900 with

00:35:53.280 loss

00:35:53.820 and death

00:35:54.460 and grief

00:35:55.120 in a

00:35:56.200 way that I

00:35:56.960 think is

00:35:57.240 very useful

00:35:58.040 to me

00:35:59.240 the

00:36:00.080 Tibetan

00:36:01.180 practice

00:36:02.420 of

00:36:02.820 meditating

00:36:03.420 on death

00:36:04.000 five times

00:36:04.900 a day

00:36:05.180 I think

00:36:05.480 it is

00:36:05.960 is really

00:36:06.960 right

00:36:07.360 is that

00:36:08.900 you should

00:36:09.400 be

00:36:09.740 you should

00:36:10.620 keep

00:36:10.900 death

00:36:11.160 close

00:36:11.660 because of

00:36:12.840 course

00:36:13.220 it is

00:36:13.960 everywhere

00:36:14.340 and

00:36:14.940 we are

00:36:15.820 dying

00:36:16.100 all the

00:36:16.420 time

00:36:16.760 and having

00:36:17.380 that

00:36:17.800 having

00:36:18.500 that

00:36:18.760 inform

00:36:19.180 how you

00:36:19.580 live

00:36:20.080 it

00:36:20.480 that

00:36:21.740 has

00:36:21.960 changed

00:36:22.260 my

00:36:22.460 life

00:36:22.700 that

00:36:22.900 has

00:36:23.100 brought

00:36:23.340 more

00:36:23.600 urgency

00:36:24.080 to

00:36:24.320 my

00:36:24.480 life

00:36:24.900 it

00:36:25.120 has

00:36:25.300 brought

00:36:25.700 much

00:36:26.280 more

00:36:26.480 connection

00:36:27.040 more

00:36:27.620 presence

00:36:28.140 and

00:36:28.920 and so

00:36:29.140 I think

00:36:29.400 that's

00:36:29.620 all

00:36:29.760 very

00:36:30.020 useful

00:36:30.480 yeah

00:36:31.480 yeah

00:36:32.160 well

00:36:32.520 more or

00:36:33.080 less

00:36:33.220 every

00:36:33.560 spiritual

00:36:34.300 tradition

00:36:34.960 recommends

00:36:36.060 that we

00:36:36.300 keep

00:36:36.600 death

00:36:37.100 in mind

00:36:37.680 and

00:36:39.040 you know

00:36:40.360 it's the

00:36:40.900 impermanence

00:36:41.600 of life

00:36:42.460 that motivates

00:36:43.440 most

00:36:43.940 philosophical

00:36:44.860 reflection

00:36:45.440 or

00:36:45.860 deliberate

00:36:46.760 practice

00:36:47.340 that's

00:36:47.820 aimed

00:36:48.240 at

00:36:48.500 wisdom

00:36:49.140 but

00:36:50.400 it's

00:36:51.020 always

00:36:51.220 seemed

00:36:51.400 to me

00:36:51.580 that

00:36:51.720 there's

00:36:51.900 a

00:36:52.520 paradox

00:36:53.160 or a

00:36:54.140 seeming

00:36:54.620 paradox

00:36:55.080 between

00:36:55.760 the

00:36:56.740 two

00:36:57.400 modes

00:36:57.800 of

00:36:57.940 response

00:36:58.600 to

00:36:59.200 this

00:36:59.600 reflection

00:37:00.760 I mean

00:37:01.040 there's

00:37:01.480 the

00:37:01.740 there's

00:37:02.420 the

00:37:02.540 mode

00:37:02.780 in which

00:37:03.080 we can

00:37:03.560 we can

00:37:04.440 really

00:37:04.680 you know

00:37:04.940 seize

00:37:05.280 the day

00:37:05.860 with a

00:37:06.280 sense

00:37:06.440 of

00:37:06.560 urgency

00:37:06.940 and

00:37:08.100 you know

00:37:09.080 follow

00:37:09.420 a sort

00:37:09.840 of

00:37:09.960 carpe

00:37:10.240 diem

00:37:10.640 piece

00:37:11.680 of

00:37:11.780 advice

00:37:12.240 which

00:37:13.360 is

00:37:14.200 just

00:37:14.500 alone

00:37:15.240 can

00:37:16.160 be a

00:37:16.560 kind

00:37:16.920 of

00:37:17.300 just

00:37:19.080 a

00:37:19.260 further

00:37:19.620 adumbration

00:37:20.780 of our

00:37:21.280 attachment

00:37:21.980 to things

00:37:22.840 and clinging

00:37:23.560 to things

00:37:24.060 I mean

00:37:24.300 you know

00:37:24.640 there's

00:37:24.880 no

00:37:25.020 bucket

00:37:25.340 list

00:37:25.800 however

00:37:26.560 fully

00:37:27.060 accomplished

00:37:27.760 that's

00:37:28.860 the

00:37:29.060 same

00:37:29.500 as

00:37:29.800 recognizing

00:37:30.520 a

00:37:31.580 quality

00:37:31.900 of

00:37:32.080 mind

00:37:32.460 that

00:37:32.840 just

00:37:33.080 doesn't

00:37:33.440 cling

00:37:33.920 to

00:37:34.640 experience

00:37:35.700 and to

00:37:36.340 life

00:37:36.680 itself

00:37:37.140 and so

00:37:37.480 there's

00:37:37.780 I think

00:37:38.260 there's

00:37:38.440 this

00:37:38.620 potential

00:37:39.460 trade-off

00:37:40.440 and confusion

00:37:41.020 between

00:37:41.440 the

00:37:42.320 urgency

00:37:42.900 of

00:37:43.820 trying to

00:37:44.620 get the

00:37:45.020 most out

00:37:45.500 of life

00:37:46.000 which

00:37:46.240 again

00:37:46.780 there's

00:37:47.440 a lot

00:37:47.740 to be

00:37:48.020 said

00:37:48.260 for that

00:37:48.740 but

00:37:49.560 that's

00:37:50.220 distinct

00:37:50.700 between

00:37:51.420 simply

00:37:52.560 recognizing

00:37:53.280 that this

00:37:53.800 moment

00:37:54.320 is already

00:37:55.080 enough

00:37:55.580 right

00:37:56.260 and I

00:37:56.560 think

00:37:56.820 more and

00:37:57.200 more

00:37:57.360 we want

00:37:58.400 and certainly

00:37:58.960 anyone with a

00:38:00.100 meditation practice

00:38:01.740 will find this

00:38:02.380 familiar

00:38:02.980 we want a mind

00:38:04.700 that is

00:38:05.580 at peace

00:38:06.740 with

00:38:07.380 experience

00:38:08.740 whatever it is

00:38:09.780 and is

00:38:10.080 at peace

00:38:11.360 with

00:38:11.800 the reality

00:38:13.280 that we're

00:38:13.760 at bottom

00:38:14.520 we're not really

00:38:15.340 in control

00:38:16.040 of anything

00:38:17.020 and

00:38:18.160 and

00:38:18.360 it's

00:38:18.880 these

00:38:19.720 kind of

00:38:20.100 nested

00:38:20.560 illusions

00:38:20.980 of

00:38:21.220 control

00:38:21.560 that

00:38:21.840 we

00:38:22.340 sort

00:38:22.560 of

00:38:22.680 fight

00:38:22.920 our

00:38:23.060 way

00:38:23.220 beyond

00:38:23.720 as we

00:38:24.340 confront

00:38:25.100 our

00:38:25.460 and

00:38:26.320 others

00:38:26.820 mortality

00:38:27.580 I'm

00:38:28.360 wondering

00:38:28.560 if either

00:38:29.200 of you

00:38:29.360 have any

00:38:29.820 reaction

00:38:30.920 to that

00:38:31.280 because

00:38:31.480 in my

00:38:32.260 own

00:38:32.460 life

00:38:32.680 I

00:38:32.860 noticed

00:38:33.260 that

00:38:33.480 I

00:38:33.640 really

00:38:34.140 am

00:38:34.320 running

00:38:34.540 both

00:38:34.940 programs

00:38:35.480 I mean

00:38:35.700 there are

00:38:35.860 many

00:38:36.040 things

00:38:36.360 I

00:38:36.600 do

00:38:37.020 because

00:38:37.800 I

00:38:37.920 want

00:38:38.140 to

00:38:38.260 do

00:38:38.380 them

00:38:38.660 and

00:38:38.780 I

00:38:38.920 have

00:38:39.580 vacations

00:38:40.580 planned

00:38:41.080 and

00:38:41.360 projects

00:38:42.000 planned

00:38:42.460 and

00:38:42.780 there

00:38:43.380 is

00:38:43.500 a

00:38:43.600 sort

00:38:43.760 of

00:38:43.900 bucket

00:38:44.180 list

00:38:44.600 mode

00:38:45.340 of

00:38:46.280 prioritizing

00:38:47.220 things

00:38:47.700 that

00:38:48.040 on their

00:38:49.060 face

00:38:49.360 seem like

00:38:49.860 good

00:38:50.440 and

00:38:50.580 enjoyable

00:38:50.900 uses

00:38:51.240 of

00:38:51.440 time

00:38:51.800 and

00:38:52.520 I

00:38:53.760 wouldn't

00:38:53.980 say

00:38:54.140 that

00:38:54.340 that

00:38:54.680 is

00:38:54.800 a

00:38:54.940 waste

00:38:55.140 of

00:38:55.300 time

00:38:55.580 but

00:38:55.940 if

00:38:56.760 you

00:38:57.120 are

00:38:57.600 living

00:38:57.880 with

00:38:58.140 the

00:38:58.460 illusion

00:38:59.260 that

00:38:59.600 your

00:38:59.800 happiness

00:39:00.240 is

00:39:00.520 going

00:39:00.680 to be

00:39:00.960 secured

00:39:01.480 only

00:39:02.680 when

00:39:02.940 you

00:39:03.180 arrive

00:39:04.020 at

00:39:04.160 the

00:39:04.300 peak

00:39:04.540 of

00:39:04.680 all

00:39:04.860 these

00:39:05.120 mountains

00:39:06.160 that

00:39:06.980 you're

00:39:07.340 planning

00:39:07.600 to

00:39:07.780 climb

00:39:08.100 you

00:39:08.780 seem

00:39:09.060 guaranteed

00:39:09.980 to be

00:39:10.280 disappointed

00:39:10.780 and

00:39:11.480 there's

00:39:12.340 sort

00:39:12.480 of

00:39:12.560 a

00:39:12.720 figure

00:39:12.940 ground

00:39:13.300 reversal

00:39:13.740 that

00:39:14.080 needs

00:39:14.740 to be

00:39:14.960 accomplished

00:39:15.340 where

00:39:15.580 you

00:39:15.720 can

00:39:15.880 recognize

00:39:16.340 well

00:39:16.600 it's

00:39:17.280 possible

00:39:17.660 to be

00:39:17.960 already

00:39:18.440 happy

00:39:19.200 before

00:39:20.300 anything

00:39:21.100 happens

00:39:21.720 before

00:39:22.240 the

00:39:22.420 vacation

00:39:22.800 actually

00:39:23.200 arrives

00:39:23.620 it's

00:39:24.700 only

00:39:24.860 worked

00:39:25.160 out

00:39:25.440 for

00:39:26.040 me

00:39:26.400 in

00:39:26.860 continually

00:39:27.980 kind

00:39:28.560 of

00:39:28.620 being

00:39:28.800 buffeted

00:39:29.340 back

00:39:29.680 and

00:39:29.840 forth

00:39:30.100 between

00:39:30.380 those

00:39:30.600 two

00:39:30.900 modes

00:39:31.420 and

00:39:31.820 recognizing

00:39:32.720 that

00:39:32.980 one

00:39:33.340 needs

00:39:34.180 to

00:39:34.360 supersede

00:39:34.820 the

00:39:34.980 other

00:39:35.200 for

00:39:35.760 me

00:39:35.940 yeah

00:39:37.140 Sam

00:39:37.700 you're

00:39:38.700 really

00:39:38.860 putting

00:39:39.120 something

00:39:39.400 really

00:39:39.680 important

00:39:40.120 here

00:39:40.460 and

00:39:40.900 I

00:39:41.420 think

00:39:41.600 in

00:39:41.740 some

00:39:41.900 ways

00:39:42.080 Shosh

00:39:42.380 and I

00:39:42.780 you know

00:39:43.500 the book

00:39:43.860 in some

00:39:44.180 ways

00:39:44.320 as a

00:39:44.640 beginner's

00:39:46.260 treatise

00:39:47.460 we mostly

00:39:49.940 sort of

00:39:50.900 suggest

00:39:51.600 or come

00:39:52.140 up to

00:39:52.780 find our

00:39:54.020 way to

00:39:54.720 oh boy

00:39:55.300 okay

00:39:55.860 time is

00:39:57.840 finite

00:39:58.960 my time

00:39:59.700 is finite

00:40:00.380 on this

00:40:01.480 planet

00:40:01.800 and okay

00:40:03.360 let's take

00:40:04.140 life seriously

00:40:04.740 let's figure

00:40:05.480 out what

00:40:05.820 let it

00:40:06.460 distill

00:40:07.220 what we

00:40:07.860 care about

00:40:08.380 and let's

00:40:08.760 pursue those

00:40:09.420 things that

00:40:09.880 we care

00:40:10.280 about

00:40:10.640 something

00:40:11.800 really

00:40:12.240 beautiful

00:40:13.140 and

00:40:13.660 wonderful

00:40:14.580 about

00:40:14.980 that

00:40:15.360 one of

00:40:16.220 the

00:40:16.320 things

00:40:16.480 if we

00:40:16.720 were

00:40:16.800 going

00:40:16.900 to

00:40:16.960 write

00:40:17.120 like

00:40:17.300 an

00:40:17.440 intermediate

00:40:17.880 guide

00:40:18.620 I

00:40:19.320 think

00:40:19.660 we'd

00:40:19.960 spend

00:40:20.220 more

00:40:20.500 time

00:40:20.960 on

00:40:21.300 you know

00:40:21.900 like

00:40:22.080 a

00:40:22.220 second

00:40:22.480 book

00:40:22.800 like

00:40:23.000 squaring

00:40:24.220 the

00:40:24.900 limits

00:40:25.520 of

00:40:26.540 that

00:40:27.380 approach

00:40:27.920 along

00:40:28.780 with

00:40:28.980 the

00:40:29.280 limits

00:40:29.620 of

00:40:29.820 the

00:40:30.020 self

00:40:30.440 you know

00:40:31.180 and if

00:40:31.740 you just

00:40:32.000 stay

00:40:32.280 in yourself

00:40:32.940 all the

00:40:33.480 time

00:40:33.780 you're

00:40:33.960 only

00:40:34.080 going

00:40:34.260 to

00:40:34.320 get

00:40:34.480 so

00:40:34.720 far

00:40:35.080 that

00:40:36.240 would

00:40:36.400 probably

00:40:36.680 be

00:40:36.940 the

00:40:37.120 second

00:40:37.600 big

00:40:38.320 book

00:40:38.620 but

00:40:39.380 you're

00:40:39.660 right

00:40:39.840 on

00:40:40.120 I

00:40:40.280 think

00:40:40.520 as I've

00:40:41.180 gone down

00:40:41.740 this road

00:40:42.080 myself

00:40:42.540 or my

00:40:43.000 work

00:40:43.380 I am

00:40:44.000 increasingly

00:40:45.020 tuned

00:40:45.620 into

00:40:46.120 and it's

00:40:46.920 always a

00:40:47.300 dynamic

00:40:47.700 just as

00:40:48.160 you're

00:40:48.280 saying

00:40:48.580 Sam

00:40:49.000 of this

00:40:49.520 other

00:40:49.940 piece

00:40:50.420 of

00:40:50.620 learning

00:40:53.040 to be

00:40:53.720 okay

00:40:54.220 with what

00:40:54.880 already

00:40:55.480 is

00:40:56.040 front

00:40:57.220 preload

00:40:58.120 your

00:40:58.380 happiness

00:40:58.880 or your

00:40:59.340 peace

00:40:59.740 and then

00:41:00.180 work

00:41:00.440 from

00:41:00.680 there

00:41:01.020 don't

00:41:02.160 this

00:41:02.760 idea

00:41:03.220 of

00:41:03.780 hedging

00:41:04.840 you know

00:41:05.380 leveraging

00:41:06.520 your

00:41:07.340 current

00:41:08.860 peace

00:41:09.500 for

00:41:09.900 some

00:41:10.320 better

00:41:11.000 peace

00:41:11.840 or more

00:41:12.460 happiness

00:41:12.980 down the

00:41:13.360 road

00:41:13.520 this

00:41:13.740 kind

00:41:14.060 of

00:41:14.160 I used

00:41:14.440 to do

00:41:14.700 this a

00:41:15.060 lot

00:41:15.260 with

00:41:15.460 myself

00:41:15.920 and I

00:41:16.220 do it

00:41:17.100 less

00:41:17.320 and less

00:41:17.860 this sort

00:41:18.580 of

00:41:18.760 leveraging

00:41:19.320 the present

00:41:19.880 for some

00:41:20.440 possible

00:41:21.240 future

00:41:21.760 and so

00:41:23.000 I think

00:41:23.380 what your

00:41:23.660 point is

00:41:24.000 just

00:41:24.260 perfect

00:41:24.720 Sam

00:41:25.020 it's

00:41:25.300 it's

00:41:25.740 really

00:41:25.980 not

00:41:26.840 one

00:41:27.180 or the

00:41:27.460 other

00:41:27.700 it's

00:41:28.000 not

00:41:28.180 being

00:41:28.760 or

00:41:29.280 doing

00:41:29.760 it's

00:41:30.200 it's

00:41:31.160 really

00:41:31.620 I think

00:41:32.680 the

00:41:32.940 project

00:41:33.580 ends

00:41:33.920 up

00:41:34.180 being

00:41:34.720 cultivating

00:41:36.360 the

00:41:36.640 good

00:41:37.140 judgment

00:41:37.640 to

00:41:38.640 pull

00:41:39.260 on

00:41:39.500 the

00:41:39.620 right

00:41:39.840 tool

00:41:40.200 and

00:41:41.620 to

00:41:41.880 not

00:41:42.160 see

00:41:42.500 these

00:41:42.820 as

00:41:42.980 a

00:41:43.100 dichotomy

00:41:43.680 it's

00:41:43.880 not

00:41:44.040 being

00:41:44.440 versus

00:41:44.880 doing

00:41:45.320 it's

00:41:45.720 not

00:41:46.060 caring

00:41:47.140 about

00:41:47.460 achievement

00:41:47.960 versus

00:41:48.720 what

00:41:49.100 you know

00:41:49.360 it's

00:41:49.500 not

00:41:49.680 these

00:41:50.240 are

00:41:50.380 false

00:41:50.720 divides

00:41:51.200 you

00:41:51.460 can

00:41:51.640 do

00:41:51.820 both

00:41:52.240 and

00:41:52.400 I

00:41:52.540 think

00:41:52.720 over

00:41:52.900 time

00:41:53.300 what

00:41:53.500 you

00:41:53.620 really

00:41:54.000 a

00:41:54.320 mature

00:41:54.720 person

00:41:55.320 gets

00:41:55.800 to

00:41:56.080 is

00:41:56.460 this

00:41:56.800 sense

00:41:57.320 of

00:41:57.500 judgment

00:41:57.820 of

00:41:58.380 toggling

00:41:59.260 between

00:41:59.700 the

00:41:59.980 two

00:42:00.220 applying

00:42:01.440 these

00:42:02.880 approaches

00:42:03.340 and

00:42:03.580 these

00:42:03.760 mindsets

00:42:04.320 at the

00:42:04.640 right

00:42:04.820 time

00:42:05.200 and

00:42:05.420 holding

00:42:05.780 it

00:42:05.960 all

00:42:06.180 loosely

00:42:06.600 leaving

00:42:07.680 room

00:42:07.940 for

00:42:08.140 things

00:42:08.400 that

00:42:08.560 you

00:42:08.660 just

00:42:08.900 don't

00:42:09.200 understand

00:42:09.940 so

00:42:11.140 there's

00:42:11.440 some

00:42:11.600 like

00:42:11.780 perhaps

00:42:12.220 like

00:42:12.400 a

00:42:12.520 unifying

00:42:13.020 theory

00:42:13.500 out

00:42:13.780 there

00:42:13.980 that

00:42:14.160 we

00:42:14.280 haven't

00:42:14.560 kind

00:42:14.760 of

00:42:14.880 hit

00:42:15.640 on

00:42:15.860 just

00:42:16.100 yet

00:42:16.320 but

00:42:16.560 you

00:42:16.740 move

00:42:17.000 between

00:42:17.440 these

00:42:17.780 valences

00:42:18.460 and

00:42:19.260 that's

00:42:19.520 where

00:42:19.600 so much

00:42:20.000 the

00:42:20.200 action

00:42:20.500 is

00:42:20.680 that's

00:42:20.880 where

00:42:21.000 you

00:42:21.120 stay

00:42:21.300 really

00:42:21.660 I

00:42:22.200 think

00:42:22.320 very

00:42:22.520 present

00:42:22.960 with

00:42:23.260 yourself

00:42:23.760 in

00:42:24.420 real

00:42:24.640 time

00:42:25.080 you

00:42:25.840 can

00:42:26.160 square

00:42:26.860 the

00:42:27.180 expectations

00:42:27.920 of

00:42:28.200 yourself

00:42:28.620 and

00:42:28.880 from

00:42:29.120 others

00:42:29.560 of

00:42:29.820 you

00:42:30.060 and

00:42:30.220 of

00:42:30.340 your

00:42:30.460 life

00:42:30.820 and

00:42:31.220 the

00:42:31.360 potential

00:42:31.760 you

00:42:31.960 have

00:42:32.180 to

00:42:32.340 make

00:42:32.560 something

00:42:32.940 with

00:42:33.200 it

00:42:33.400 with

00:42:34.460 the

00:42:34.740 idea

00:42:35.040 that

00:42:35.260 it's

00:42:35.980 never

00:42:36.180 going

00:42:36.380 to be

00:42:36.580 enough

00:42:36.920 if

00:42:37.160 you're

00:42:37.280 really

00:42:37.500 paying

00:42:37.780 attention

00:42:38.220 there's

00:42:38.920 always

00:42:39.240 more

00:42:39.560 it's

00:42:39.860 always

00:42:40.200 a

00:42:40.400 work

00:42:40.620 in

00:42:40.780 progress

00:42:41.260 so

00:42:41.660 yeah

00:42:42.360 I don't

00:42:42.980 know

00:42:43.100 that I'm

00:42:43.340 saying

00:42:43.580 anything

00:42:44.020 novel

00:42:44.440 there

00:42:44.680 Sam

00:42:44.940 I think

00:42:45.220 you spelled

00:42:45.660 that perfectly

00:42:46.380 but that

00:42:46.920 so much

00:42:47.640 really

00:42:48.100 is as far

00:42:49.000 as I can

00:42:49.380 see

00:42:49.620 is the

00:42:50.060 project

00:42:50.500 yeah

00:42:51.740 yeah

00:42:52.000 well

00:42:52.180 just the

00:42:52.800 being

00:42:53.080 doing

00:42:53.480 opposition

00:42:54.420 lends

00:42:55.200 itself

00:42:55.540 to

00:42:55.840 being

00:42:56.660 while

00:42:57.020 doing

00:42:57.400 right

00:42:58.140 I mean

00:42:58.420 really

00:42:59.420 you can

00:42:59.860 run

00:43:00.240 those

00:43:00.500 two

00:43:00.860 together

00:43:01.900 yeah

00:43:02.420 yeah

00:43:02.880 yeah

00:43:04.240 yeah

00:43:04.780 there's that

00:43:05.300 great phrase

00:43:06.000 life is what

00:43:06.960 happens while

00:43:07.520 you're

00:43:07.680 planning that

00:43:08.220 vacation

00:43:08.720 right

00:43:09.320 I mean

00:43:10.020 we tend

00:43:11.160 to live

00:43:11.860 in any

00:43:12.960 tents

00:43:13.440 but the

00:43:13.820 present

00:43:14.240 we

00:43:14.720 live in

00:43:15.760 the past

00:43:16.320 and feel

00:43:16.700 regret

00:43:17.060 we are

00:43:17.800 planning

00:43:18.200 for the

00:43:18.580 future

00:43:19.060 I remember

00:43:20.020 this

00:43:20.300 there's

00:43:20.760 I don't

00:43:21.300 know if

00:43:21.560 you ever

00:43:21.920 saw that

00:43:22.460 movie

00:43:22.840 Nomadland

00:43:23.780 oh

00:43:24.440 no

00:43:24.680 no

00:43:25.180 oh

00:43:25.500 it's

00:43:25.880 this

00:43:26.140 wonderful

00:43:26.660 movie

00:43:27.040 with

00:43:27.300 Francis

00:43:27.680 McDormand

00:43:28.240 but there's

00:43:28.820 a story

00:43:29.520 it's

00:43:30.040 basically

00:43:30.360 about

00:43:30.680 people

00:43:31.020 who

00:43:31.300 hit

00:43:31.540 the

00:43:31.720 road

00:43:32.100 in

00:43:32.920 vans

00:43:33.940 and are

00:43:34.400 are

00:43:34.820 unhoused

00:43:35.620 and just

00:43:36.100 you know

00:43:36.620 just

00:43:36.920 travel

00:43:37.420 through

00:43:38.120 life

00:43:38.540 and

00:43:40.080 there's

00:43:41.460 one scene

00:43:42.180 in which

00:43:42.540 they're all

00:43:42.980 sitting around

00:43:43.440 the fire

00:43:44.000 at night

00:43:44.540 in essentially

00:43:45.900 the trailer

00:43:46.400 park and

00:43:47.040 telling stories

00:43:48.300 of why

00:43:49.020 they became

00:43:49.540 nomads

00:43:50.180 and one

00:43:51.960 woman

00:43:52.300 says

00:43:52.900 you know

00:43:53.380 I was

00:43:53.920 working

00:43:54.320 in the

00:43:54.600 corporate

00:43:54.840 world

00:43:55.300 for

00:43:55.720 20

00:43:56.200 years

00:43:56.600 and

00:43:56.880 my

00:43:57.860 boss

00:43:58.340 saved up

00:43:59.480 for

00:43:59.800 a boat

00:44:00.340 which

00:44:01.160 he had

00:44:01.680 parked

00:44:01.980 in his

00:44:02.300 driveway

00:44:02.680 and

00:44:03.140 he kept

00:44:04.400 saying

00:44:04.720 you know

00:44:04.980 I just

00:44:05.380 I can't

00:44:06.100 wait to

00:44:06.480 retire

00:44:06.960 and take

00:44:07.420 this

00:44:07.640 boat

00:44:07.920 out

00:44:08.240 and

00:44:08.580 just

00:44:09.120 set

00:44:09.420 sail

00:44:09.840 and

00:44:10.260 everything

00:44:11.560 was dreaming

00:44:12.320 about

00:44:12.700 this

00:44:12.960 future

00:44:13.440 this

00:44:13.740 imagined

00:44:14.320 future

00:44:14.800 happiness

00:44:15.300 that he

00:44:16.080 was in

00:44:17.080 pursuit

00:44:17.460 of

00:44:17.900 and

00:44:19.020 then of

00:44:19.540 course

00:44:19.760 he

00:44:20.220 got a

00:44:21.860 terminal

00:44:22.140 diagnosis

00:44:22.680 while still

00:44:23.460 at work

00:44:24.040 and a

00:44:25.180 very short

00:44:25.860 window of

00:44:26.420 time

00:44:26.820 and

00:44:27.600 that

00:44:28.140 boat

00:44:28.460 never

00:44:28.800 left

00:44:29.160 the

00:44:29.340 driveway

00:44:29.700 and

00:44:31.700 she

00:44:32.420 says

00:44:32.780 that was

00:44:33.080 the

00:44:33.260 moment

00:44:33.520 that

00:44:33.840 catalyzed

00:44:34.380 her

00:44:34.600 and

00:44:34.820 she

00:44:35.040 was

00:44:35.200 like

00:44:35.420 my

00:44:36.920 life

00:44:37.440 I'm

00:44:38.220 not

00:44:38.360 waiting

00:44:38.620 for

00:44:38.820 my

00:44:39.000 life

00:44:39.200 to

00:44:39.380 start

00:44:39.680 I'm

00:44:40.400 going

00:44:40.520 to

00:44:40.640 start

00:44:41.000 it

00:44:41.140 now

00:44:41.460 and

00:44:41.860 she

00:44:42.120 got

00:44:42.560 in

00:44:42.700 the

00:44:42.800 van

00:44:43.060 and

00:44:43.280 rode

00:44:43.480 off

00:44:43.680 into

00:44:43.820 the

00:44:44.000 sunset

00:44:44.280 and

00:44:45.300 I

00:44:45.420 think

00:44:45.620 there's

00:44:46.440 so

00:44:47.040 much

00:44:47.220 wisdom

00:44:47.580 in

00:44:48.300 so

00:44:48.720 much

00:44:48.960 of

00:44:49.280 the

00:44:50.040 conversations

00:44:50.580 you

00:44:50.900 have

00:44:51.260 about

00:44:51.580 this

00:44:51.940 about

00:44:52.280 that

00:44:52.620 illusory

00:44:53.960 pursuit

00:44:54.540 of

00:44:54.780 some

00:44:55.000 future

00:44:55.540 happiness

00:44:56.080 when

00:44:56.720 really

00:44:57.500 the

00:44:57.740 moment

00:44:58.240 that

00:44:59.000 we

00:44:59.160 have

00:44:59.440 now

00:44:59.820 is

00:45:00.080 the

00:45:00.260 most

00:45:00.620 voluminous

00:45:03.220 opportunity

00:45:03.840 we have

00:45:04.360 for that

00:45:04.840 and

00:45:06.380 I have

00:45:06.960 to say

00:45:07.200 there was

00:45:07.520 a lot

00:45:08.220 of

00:45:08.600 lessons

00:45:09.580 about

00:45:09.940 that

00:45:10.300 in

00:45:10.600 caregiving

00:45:11.180 for

00:45:11.660 me

00:45:12.060 so

00:45:13.440 when I

00:45:13.760 was taking

00:45:14.120 care of

00:45:14.540 my

00:45:14.700 father

00:45:15.080 I

00:45:16.340 really

00:45:16.880 had to

00:45:18.080 investigate

00:45:18.840 the nature

00:45:19.860 of time

00:45:20.600 in a

00:45:21.160 different

00:45:21.380 way

00:45:21.640 I

00:45:21.760 had to

00:45:22.200 really

00:45:22.760 synchronize

00:45:23.860 to

00:45:24.140 his

00:45:24.520 time

00:45:25.040 which

00:45:26.140 was

00:45:26.520 very

00:45:27.300 slow

00:45:28.100 a much

00:45:28.480 slower

00:45:28.880 metabolic

00:45:29.340 rate

00:45:29.720 than I'm

00:45:30.060 certainly

00:45:30.360 used to

00:45:30.740 I'm

00:45:30.940 a really

00:45:31.260 busy

00:45:31.760 full-time

00:45:33.160 working

00:45:33.520 person

00:45:33.960 with two

00:45:34.480 teenagers

00:45:34.940 and

00:45:35.920 we mostly

00:45:37.320 live

00:45:37.960 in

00:45:38.960 chronos

00:45:39.840 that

00:45:40.080 linear

00:45:40.840 clock

00:45:41.540 time

00:45:42.040 of which

00:45:43.240 there's

00:45:43.480 never

00:45:43.740 enough

00:45:44.180 right

00:45:44.640 the

00:45:45.920 stoic

00:45:46.720 philosopher

00:45:47.160 Seneca

00:45:47.600 writes

00:45:48.480 about

00:45:48.680 the

00:45:48.840 shortness

00:45:49.240 of

00:45:49.420 life

00:45:49.780 and

00:45:50.020 you

00:45:50.220 know

00:45:50.300 he

00:45:50.440 postulates

00:45:50.960 that

00:45:51.240 it

00:45:51.540 feels

00:45:52.400 long

00:45:52.980 if you

00:45:53.320 know

00:45:53.420 how

00:45:53.560 to

00:45:53.700 live

00:45:53.900 it

00:45:54.120 you

00:45:54.360 know

00:45:54.500 that

00:45:54.660 you

00:45:54.780 can

00:45:55.040 if

00:45:55.780 you

00:45:56.100 find

00:45:57.160 length

00:45:58.380 in

00:45:58.660 those

00:45:58.880 moments

00:45:59.400 time

00:45:59.780 can

00:45:59.940 be

00:46:00.080 elastic

00:46:00.640 and

00:46:01.340 can

00:46:01.540 expand

00:46:02.100 and

00:46:02.400 contract

00:46:02.880 depending

00:46:03.280 on how

00:46:03.660 we

00:46:03.820 inhabit

00:46:04.240 it

00:46:04.500 so

00:46:04.780 you

00:46:05.300 can

00:46:05.440 either

00:46:05.640 be

00:46:06.080 kind

00:46:06.440 of

00:46:06.560 ravaged

00:46:07.220 by

00:46:07.700 chronos

00:46:09.060 and

00:46:09.220 linear

00:46:09.440 time

00:46:10.520 and it

00:46:10.820 can

00:46:10.940 become

00:46:11.160 very

00:46:11.380 transactional

00:46:12.300 you know

00:46:12.660 we have

00:46:12.900 all these

00:46:13.480 phrases about

00:46:14.220 that time

00:46:14.740 is money

00:46:15.240 and you're

00:46:15.720 wasting

00:46:16.040 time

00:46:16.740 time waits

00:46:18.080 for no

00:46:18.460 one

00:46:18.840 but

00:46:20.180 you know

00:46:21.400 when you

00:46:22.220 are caregiving

00:46:23.060 you really

00:46:23.500 have to

00:46:23.840 slow

00:46:24.160 time

00:46:24.580 down

00:46:25.140 and

00:46:26.380 just

00:46:27.180 be

00:46:27.440 there

00:46:27.760 and

00:46:28.820 there

00:46:29.340 are

00:46:29.500 real

00:46:29.700 depths

00:46:30.180 to

00:46:30.540 plumb

00:46:30.980 I

00:46:31.240 found

00:46:31.660 there

00:46:32.000 you know

00:46:32.300 I would

00:46:32.620 often

00:46:32.860 just

00:46:33.120 end up

00:46:33.480 sitting

00:46:33.720 on the

00:46:34.020 couch

00:46:34.320 with my

00:46:34.720 father

00:46:35.040 holding

00:46:35.440 hands

00:46:36.140 and

00:46:37.300 there

00:46:38.180 was

00:46:38.600 a

00:46:39.280 universe

00:46:39.740 of

00:46:40.000 feeling

00:46:40.340 there

00:46:40.660 that I

00:46:40.960 really

00:46:41.200 hadn't

00:46:41.500 had

00:46:41.760 with

00:46:41.940 my

00:46:42.120 father

00:46:42.420 before

00:46:42.840 because

00:46:43.160 we

00:46:43.320 had

00:46:43.420 had

00:46:43.620 a

00:46:43.760 very

00:46:44.020 heady

00:46:44.380 kind

00:46:44.700 of

00:46:44.900 relationship

00:46:46.260 that

00:46:46.600 was

00:46:46.940 really

00:46:47.420 built

00:46:47.680 on

00:46:48.080 commerce

00:46:48.980 of

00:46:49.140 ideas

00:46:49.540 and

00:46:50.020 just

00:46:50.540 conversation

00:46:51.160 and

00:46:51.520 suddenly

00:46:52.080 he

00:46:52.500 had

00:46:52.660 no

00:46:52.840 use

00:46:53.160 for

00:46:53.340 language

00:46:54.020 no

00:46:55.040 use

00:46:55.360 for

00:46:55.540 hearing

00:46:55.800 about

00:46:56.100 my

00:46:56.380 life

00:46:56.740 and

00:46:56.880 my

00:46:57.040 accomplishments

00:46:57.600 but

00:46:57.980 just

00:46:58.960 sitting

00:46:59.360 and

00:46:59.780 being

00:47:00.120 with

00:47:00.400 him

00:47:00.660 and

00:47:00.820 watching

00:47:01.140 my

00:47:01.400 kids

00:47:01.660 play

00:47:02.100 became

00:47:03.040 this

00:47:03.460 shift

00:47:04.040 in

00:47:04.780 how

00:47:05.580 you

00:47:05.920 inhabit

00:47:06.360 time

00:47:06.800 and

00:47:06.960 feel

00:47:07.240 time

00:47:07.680 and

00:47:07.880 it

00:47:08.700 it's

00:47:09.340 like

00:47:09.600 there's

00:47:10.260 that

00:47:10.440 phrase

00:47:10.760 don't

00:47:11.060 just

00:47:11.220 sit

00:47:11.420 there

00:47:11.620 do

00:47:11.800 something

00:47:12.180 which

00:47:12.620 gets

00:47:13.160 inverted

00:47:13.720 in

00:47:15.200 the

00:47:15.320 most

00:47:15.500 lovely

00:47:15.800 way

00:47:16.080 when

00:47:16.280 you're

00:47:16.420 taking

00:47:16.620 care

00:47:16.860 of

00:47:17.020 someone

00:47:17.320 who

00:47:17.520 needs

00:47:17.740 quiet

00:47:18.100 and

00:47:18.300 it

00:47:18.560 turns

00:47:18.860 into

00:47:19.140 don't

00:47:19.620 just

00:47:19.800 do

00:47:20.080 something

00:47:20.580 sit

00:47:21.500 there

00:47:21.800 yeah

00:47:22.720 so

00:47:24.420 okay

00:47:24.780 so

00:47:25.000 we can

00:47:25.740 we're

00:47:26.720 really

00:47:27.060 talking

00:47:27.400 about

00:47:27.600 both

00:47:27.840 sides

00:47:28.160 of

00:47:28.280 this

00:47:28.480 but

00:47:28.840 I

00:47:29.860 think

00:47:29.980 it's

00:47:30.100 useful

00:47:30.320 to

00:47:30.660 acknowledge

00:47:31.420 how

00:47:32.280 different

00:47:32.840 they

00:47:33.920 are

00:47:34.240 even

00:47:34.460 though

00:47:34.820 they

00:47:35.640 both

00:47:35.940 come

00:47:36.140 to

00:47:36.280 mind

00:47:36.540 when

00:47:36.700 we

00:47:36.840 talk

00:47:37.080 about

00:47:37.300 death

00:47:37.660 and

00:47:38.360 there's

00:47:38.600 the

00:47:38.800 difference

00:47:39.480 between

00:47:39.900 being

00:47:40.440 the

00:47:40.620 one

00:47:40.840 dying

00:47:41.300 and

00:47:42.000 being

00:47:42.480 among

00:47:43.460 the

00:47:43.780 bereaved

00:47:44.860 or

00:47:45.240 soon

00:47:45.680 to be

00:47:45.920 bereaved

00:47:46.860 and

00:47:47.240 they're

00:47:47.700 just

00:47:47.880 they're

00:47:48.340 very

00:47:48.740 different

00:47:49.420 experiences

00:47:50.620 obviously

00:47:51.880 I can

00:47:52.140 only

00:47:52.280 talk

00:47:52.540 about

00:47:52.820 one

00:47:53.280 of

00:47:53.400 them

00:47:53.580 but

00:47:53.920 BJ

00:47:55.700 you

00:47:55.960 have

00:47:56.140 seen

00:47:56.560 both

00:47:57.740 for

00:47:58.500 years

00:47:58.840 and

00:47:59.000 years

00:47:59.280 and

00:47:59.520 I

00:47:59.920 can

00:48:00.060 imagine

00:48:00.360 you've

00:48:00.580 seen

00:48:00.880 hundreds

00:48:01.900 if not

00:48:02.280 thousands

00:48:02.640 of

00:48:02.840 people

00:48:03.120 die

00:48:04.260 and

00:48:04.920 that

00:48:05.600 many

00:48:05.800 families

00:48:06.380 and

00:48:07.320 circles

00:48:08.020 of

00:48:08.180 friends

00:48:08.500 go

00:48:08.880 through

00:48:09.340 the

00:48:09.740 bereavement

00:48:10.080 process

00:48:10.560 I

00:48:11.300 think

00:48:11.900 we

00:48:12.020 should

00:48:12.120 cover

00:48:12.420 any

00:48:13.000 side

00:48:13.320 of

00:48:13.420 it

00:48:13.520 you

00:48:13.600 want

00:48:13.880 to

00:48:14.020 but

00:48:14.240 perhaps

00:48:14.780 we

00:48:14.960 can

00:48:15.080 start

00:48:15.560 with

00:48:16.180 and

00:48:16.600 this

00:48:16.760 is

00:48:16.860 sort

00:48:17.040 of

00:48:17.160 where

00:48:17.320 your

00:48:17.600 book

00:48:18.340 starts

00:48:19.420 with

00:48:20.580 advice

00:48:21.200 for

00:48:21.880 healthy

00:48:23.260 people

00:48:23.680 for

00:48:23.960 whom

00:48:24.240 death

00:48:24.640 is

00:48:24.860 still

00:48:25.240 fairly

00:48:26.200 hypothetical

00:48:27.040 right

00:48:28.140 I mean

00:48:28.300 they may

00:48:28.540 have

00:48:28.680 had

00:48:28.860 someone

00:48:29.100 close

00:48:29.440 to

00:48:29.540 them

00:48:29.660 die

00:48:29.900 at

00:48:30.020 some

00:48:30.180 point

00:48:30.420 but

00:48:30.640 they're

00:48:31.320 not

00:48:31.500 dealing

00:48:31.820 with

00:48:32.040 it

00:48:32.140 now

00:48:32.440 and

00:48:32.680 life

00:48:33.240 is

00:48:33.560 quote

00:48:34.520 normal

00:48:34.920 and

00:48:35.840 you

00:48:36.620 haven't

00:48:36.920 been

00:48:37.180 dragged

00:48:38.040 into

00:48:38.340 the

00:48:38.700 kingdom

00:48:39.780 of

00:48:40.160 mortality

00:48:41.120 which

00:48:41.600 happens

00:48:42.020 the moment

00:48:42.380 your

00:48:42.640 day

00:48:43.340 is

00:48:43.480 now

00:48:43.840 going

00:48:44.540 to be

00:48:44.680 spent

00:48:44.900 at

00:48:45.020 a

00:48:45.140 hospital

00:48:45.520 whether

00:48:46.240 for

00:48:46.440 your

00:48:46.580 own

00:48:46.740 illness

00:48:47.060 or

00:48:47.320 the

00:48:47.720 illness

00:48:48.040 of

00:48:48.260 someone

00:48:48.980 you

00:48:49.140 love

00:48:49.400 so

00:48:50.300 let's

00:48:51.400 talk

00:48:51.580 about

00:48:51.740 normal

00:48:52.080 life

00:48:52.420 what

00:48:52.700 do

00:48:53.120 you

00:48:53.300 both

00:48:53.780 advise

00:48:54.660 people

00:48:55.020 to

00:48:55.320 do

00:48:56.160 now

00:48:56.960 well

00:48:58.360 so

00:48:58.560 maybe

00:48:58.780 I'll

00:48:58.960 set

00:48:59.180 us

00:48:59.340 up

00:48:59.520 here

00:48:59.800 if

00:48:59.980 that's

00:49:00.160 all

00:49:00.280 right

00:49:00.460 and

00:49:00.700 we

00:49:01.460 can

00:49:01.640 play

00:49:02.120 together

00:49:02.440 on

00:49:02.600 this

00:49:02.760 one

00:49:02.920 too

00:49:03.160 I

00:49:04.920 couple

00:49:05.620 thoughts

00:49:06.020 you

00:49:06.520 know

00:49:06.640 one

00:49:07.040 is

00:49:07.220 just

00:49:07.380 to

00:49:07.580 get

00:49:07.720 to

00:49:07.900 your

00:49:08.060 you

00:49:08.320 know

00:49:08.420 the

00:49:08.540 pretext

00:49:08.940 of

00:49:09.040 your

00:49:09.120 question

00:49:09.520 Sam

00:49:09.880 it's

00:49:10.180 yeah

00:49:10.820 you

00:49:11.600 could

00:49:12.020 very

00:49:12.380 easily

00:49:12.860 and

00:49:13.180 well

00:49:13.480 make

00:49:13.780 the

00:49:13.920 argument

00:49:14.180 when

00:49:14.440 do

00:49:14.560 we

00:49:14.680 begin

00:49:14.960 dying

00:49:15.400 you

00:49:15.660 know

00:49:15.740 you

00:49:15.940 could

00:49:16.260 certain

00:49:16.840 they

00:49:18.820 were

00:49:19.040 born

00:49:19.500 somewhere

00:49:20.560 after our

00:49:21.120 brain

00:49:21.380 stopped

00:49:21.660 developing

00:49:22.140 if they

00:49:22.560 ever

00:49:22.700 do

00:49:22.940 you

00:49:23.200 know

00:49:23.340 pick

00:49:23.600 a

00:49:23.740 but

00:49:24.220 that

00:49:24.440 that

00:49:24.700 that

00:49:25.120 that

00:49:25.460 that's

00:49:25.860 an

00:49:25.980 evasive

00:49:26.380 answer

00:49:26.940 there

00:49:27.540 is

00:49:27.900 something

00:49:28.780 different

00:49:29.800 about

00:49:30.360 when

00:49:31.620 your

00:49:32.140 horizon

00:49:34.920 when you

00:49:35.540 have

00:49:35.860 when

00:49:36.060 you

00:49:36.180 know

00:49:36.460 the

00:49:36.680 thing

00:49:36.920 that's

00:49:37.180 going

00:49:37.320 to

00:49:37.420 end

00:49:37.620 your

00:49:37.780 life

00:49:38.180 it's

00:49:38.760 not

00:49:39.040 it's

00:49:39.340 just

00:49:39.660 it's

00:49:40.420 more

00:49:40.560 of a

00:49:40.800 spectrum

00:49:41.200 as you

00:49:41.620 move

00:49:41.900 from

00:49:42.160 abstraction

00:49:42.760 to

00:49:43.140 reality

00:49:43.620 but

00:49:44.520 there

00:49:44.680 are

00:49:44.820 meaningful

00:49:45.200 differences

00:49:45.740 from

00:49:46.060 someone

00:49:46.440 who's

00:49:46.740 at

00:49:46.860 the

00:49:46.980 end

00:49:47.120 stages

00:49:47.520 of

00:49:47.900 an

00:49:48.260 illness

00:49:48.640 and

00:49:48.920 dying

00:49:49.620 at

00:49:49.780 any

00:49:49.960 moment

00:49:50.360 from

00:49:51.060 someone

00:49:51.440 who's

00:49:51.680 walking

00:49:52.040 around

00:49:52.420 talking

00:49:52.880 and

00:49:53.200 otherwise

00:49:54.180 in good

00:49:54.700 health

00:49:55.040 per se

00:49:55.520 et cetera

00:49:55.920 so

00:49:56.220 your

00:49:57.900 question

00:49:58.280 alone

00:49:58.540 brings up

00:49:58.940 a lot

00:49:59.140 of good

00:49:59.360 points

00:49:59.680 but let's

00:50:00.080 just hold

00:50:00.500 that

00:50:00.760 there's

00:50:01.060 a

00:50:01.220 difference

00:50:01.500 between

00:50:02.040 sort

00:50:02.960 of

00:50:03.020 the

00:50:03.140 acute

00:50:04.180 or

00:50:04.440 near

00:50:04.860 term

00:50:05.160 dying

00:50:05.560 phase

00:50:06.020 and

00:50:06.260 the

00:50:06.740 rest

00:50:06.940 of

00:50:07.100 life

00:50:07.360 and

00:50:08.120 you

00:50:08.240 see

00:50:08.360 that

00:50:08.540 in

00:50:08.660 the

00:50:08.800 body

00:50:09.140 you

00:50:09.480 know

00:50:09.580 one

00:50:09.840 you

00:50:10.100 know

00:50:10.240 one

00:50:10.460 of

00:50:10.560 our

00:50:10.700 chapters

00:50:11.040 is

00:50:11.320 on

00:50:11.560 final

00:50:11.960 days

00:50:12.420 when

00:50:12.660 things

00:50:14.340 rules

00:50:15.520 of

00:50:15.760 thumb

00:50:16.040 that

00:50:16.260 guide

00:50:16.580 you

00:50:16.760 through

00:50:16.900 the

00:50:17.020 rest

00:50:17.200 of

00:50:17.340 life

00:50:17.540 no

00:50:17.740 longer

00:50:17.980 really

00:50:18.300 apply

00:50:18.760 you

00:50:19.220 know

00:50:19.360 food

00:50:19.700 and

00:50:19.900 water

00:50:20.200 goes

00:50:20.580 from

00:50:20.820 something

00:50:21.320 of

00:50:21.840 sustenance

00:50:22.880 to

00:50:23.060 something

00:50:23.320 that

00:50:23.500 actually

00:50:23.780 can

00:50:24.020 hurt

00:50:24.240 you

00:50:24.400 for

00:50:24.580 example

00:50:25.040 so

00:50:25.880 there's

00:50:26.080 some

00:50:26.260 other

00:50:26.460 examples

00:50:26.960 in the

00:50:27.300 world

00:50:27.520 of

00:50:27.700 physiology

00:50:28.320 but

00:50:28.680 so

00:50:29.680 but

00:50:30.400 let's

00:50:30.940 take

00:50:31.280 so

00:50:31.780 that's

00:50:32.420 all

00:50:32.620 behind

00:50:33.220 your

00:50:33.440 question

00:50:33.880 but

00:50:34.160 let's

00:50:34.440 get

00:50:34.640 to

00:50:34.920 the

00:50:35.140 to

00:50:35.540 your

00:50:35.640 question

00:50:36.020 so

00:50:36.340 you

00:50:37.160 know

00:50:37.360 one

00:50:38.160 of

00:50:38.240 the

00:50:38.300 reasons

00:50:38.580 why

00:50:38.880 and

00:50:39.120 by

00:50:39.240 the

00:50:39.320 way

00:50:39.480 let's

00:50:39.780 give

00:50:39.900 Shosham

00:50:40.320 credit

00:50:40.540 it was

00:50:40.760 her

00:50:40.960 idea

00:50:41.180 to

00:50:41.320 write

00:50:41.500 this

00:50:41.740 book

00:50:42.040 and

00:50:42.200 it

00:50:42.300 was

00:50:42.420 a

00:50:42.560 terrifying

00:50:42.960 prospect

00:50:43.580 but

00:50:44.000 we

00:50:44.520 both

00:50:44.840 it

00:50:45.060 was

00:50:45.160 an

00:50:45.260 easy

00:50:45.480 thing

00:50:45.840 for

00:50:46.020 me

00:50:54.020 lot

00:50:54.160 of

00:50:54.300 unnecessary

00:50:54.800 suffering

00:50:55.580 and

00:50:56.340 it

00:50:56.460 was

00:50:56.580 also

00:50:57.760 a joy

00:50:58.220 to

00:50:58.420 write

00:50:58.700 with

00:50:59.100 Shosh

00:50:59.480 in so

00:50:59.860 many

00:51:00.020 ways

00:51:00.300 as a

00:51:01.180 layperson

00:51:01.740 as a

00:51:02.160 caregiver

00:51:02.560 as a

00:51:03.000 design

00:51:03.340 thinker

00:51:03.820 not

00:51:04.560 as a

00:51:04.900 clinician

00:51:05.240 so

00:51:05.700 just

00:51:06.520 wanted

00:51:06.740 to

00:51:06.900 get

00:51:07.100 that

00:51:07.340 out

00:51:07.520 there

00:51:07.700 too

00:51:08.020 so

00:51:08.760 you

00:51:09.220 know

00:51:09.420 and

00:51:10.180 I'll

00:51:10.320 cut

00:51:10.480 to

00:51:10.580 you

00:51:10.720 Shosh

00:51:10.900 in

00:51:11.040 a

00:51:11.120 second

00:51:11.300 because

00:51:11.560 a lot

00:51:11.900 of

00:51:12.000 your

00:51:12.120 work

00:51:12.360 was

00:51:12.500 some

00:51:12.680 of

00:51:12.800 those

00:51:12.940 early

00:51:13.200 chapters

00:51:13.720 but

00:51:14.520 just

00:51:14.720 to

00:51:14.920 say

00:51:15.300 you

00:51:16.160 know

00:51:16.400 the

00:51:16.840 reasons

00:51:17.520 to

00:51:18.120 write

00:51:19.060 a

00:51:19.200 book

00:51:24.020 your

00:51:24.300 early

00:51:25.380 in

00:51:25.560 life

00:51:25.880 the

00:51:26.860 thesis

00:51:27.220 is

00:51:27.460 don't

00:51:27.840 wait

00:51:28.120 until

00:51:28.360 that

00:51:28.580 diagnosis

00:51:29.260 to

00:51:29.720 realize

00:51:30.160 you're

00:51:30.400 mortal

00:51:30.720 if

00:51:30.940 you

00:51:31.060 can

00:51:31.400 invite

00:51:32.760 the

00:51:33.240 truth

00:51:33.800 of

00:51:34.160 death

00:51:34.840 into

00:51:35.220 your

00:51:35.460 life

00:51:35.720 earlier

00:51:36.200 and

00:51:37.220 you'll

00:51:37.500 receive

00:51:37.860 its

00:51:38.100 lessons

00:51:38.500 and

00:51:39.720 on

00:51:39.920 practical

00:51:40.320 terms

00:51:40.860 there

00:51:41.420 are

00:51:41.540 some

00:51:41.700 things

00:51:42.080 any

00:51:42.340 of

00:51:42.480 us

00:51:42.620 can

00:51:42.800 do

00:51:43.000 early

00:51:43.340 in

00:51:43.540 life

00:51:43.780 that

00:51:43.980 will

00:51:44.160 prepare

00:51:44.580 us

00:51:44.960 for

00:51:45.400 our

00:51:45.680 eventual

00:51:46.080 death

00:51:46.540 in

00:51:46.780 some

00:51:47.000 real

00:51:47.220 practical

00:51:47.680 ways

00:51:48.080 so

00:51:48.340 one

00:51:49.100 thing

00:51:49.260 to

00:51:49.400 realize

00:51:49.740 is

00:51:49.980 our

00:51:50.140 healthcare

00:51:50.480 system

00:51:51.120 the

00:51:52.400 default

00:51:54.020 system

00:51:54.340 are

00:51:54.700 to

00:51:55.220 put

00:51:56.000 you

00:51:56.120 on

00:51:56.260 machines

00:51:56.780 take

00:51:57.200 you

00:51:57.300 to

00:51:57.380 ICU

00:51:57.820 do

00:51:58.380 everything

00:51:58.840 humanly

00:51:59.320 possible

00:51:59.800 to

00:52:00.320 keep

00:52:00.620 your

00:52:00.760 heart

00:52:01.040 beating

00:52:01.500 and

00:52:02.680 in

00:52:02.900 the

00:52:03.320 world

00:52:03.580 of

00:52:03.760 medicine

00:52:04.100 again

00:52:04.400 a

00:52:04.560 very

00:52:04.760 reductive

00:52:05.260 very

00:52:05.460 powerful

00:52:06.000 but

00:52:06.240 very

00:52:06.480 reductive

00:52:07.060 lens

00:52:07.460 onto

00:52:07.720 life

00:52:08.460 basically

00:52:09.620 holds

00:52:10.000 that

00:52:10.160 if

00:52:10.240 you

00:52:10.320 got

00:52:10.440 a

00:52:10.540 heartbeat

00:52:10.840 you're

00:52:11.100 alive

00:52:11.500 essentially

00:52:12.160 some

00:52:12.780 brain

00:52:13.220 activity

00:52:13.640 you're

00:52:13.800 alive

00:52:14.160 most

00:52:14.920 of us

00:52:15.220 wouldn't

00:52:15.520 consider

00:52:15.920 that

00:52:16.220 living

00:52:17.100 by

00:52:17.560 some

00:52:17.860 definition

00:52:18.480 but

00:52:19.360 that's

00:52:19.640 the

00:52:19.760 healthcare

00:52:20.060 definition

00:52:20.660 so

00:52:21.160 if

00:52:21.500 you

00:52:21.720 don't

00:52:22.200 do

00:52:22.460 say

00:52:22.800 an

00:52:22.940 advanced

00:52:23.300 directive

00:52:23.740 you

00:52:24.600 run

00:52:24.840 the

00:52:25.000 risk

00:52:25.320 of

00:52:25.600 just

00:52:25.840 falling

00:52:26.180 down

00:52:26.420 the

00:52:26.600 default

00:52:27.040 path

00:52:27.440 of

00:52:27.600 medicine

00:52:27.920 and

00:52:28.100 ending

00:52:28.320 up

00:52:28.620 in

00:52:28.900 the

00:52:29.060 situations

00:52:29.560 you

00:52:29.800 probably

00:52:30.220 don't

00:52:30.500 want

00:52:30.660 to

00:52:30.740 be

00:52:30.900 in

00:52:31.060 or

00:52:31.240 you

00:52:31.360 might

00:52:31.620 not

00:52:31.860 want

00:52:32.060 to

00:52:32.140 be

00:52:32.280 in

00:52:32.460 so

00:52:32.740 there's

00:52:33.600 a

00:52:34.080 big

00:52:34.260 reason

00:52:34.520 to

00:52:34.680 think

00:52:34.880 about

00:52:35.100 it

00:52:35.220 so

00:52:35.400 you

00:52:35.700 can

00:52:36.020 get

00:52:36.260 the

00:52:36.440 sort

00:52:36.580 of

00:52:36.700 death

00:52:36.980 that

00:52:37.220 suits

00:52:37.860 you

00:52:38.160 another

00:52:38.980 reason

00:52:39.280 of

00:52:39.420 course

00:52:39.680 is

00:52:39.980 to

00:52:40.740 prepare

00:52:41.100 for

00:52:41.400 it

00:52:41.520 so

00:52:41.700 that

00:52:41.960 it's

00:52:42.480 kind

00:52:42.720 of

00:52:42.780 one

00:52:42.900 of

00:52:42.960 the

00:52:43.080 kind

00:52:43.360 est

00:52:43.520 things

00:52:43.720 you

00:52:43.880 can

00:52:44.060 do

00:52:44.220 for

00:52:44.400 your

00:52:44.540 family

00:52:44.940 and

00:52:45.180 friends

00:52:45.560 people

00:52:46.040 who

00:52:46.280 will

00:52:46.460 live

00:52:46.640 on

00:52:46.820 after

00:52:47.100 you

00:52:47.260 if

00:52:47.400 you've

00:52:47.700 stated

00:52:48.100 your

00:52:48.380 wishes

00:52:48.820 if

00:52:49.920 you've

00:52:50.140 made

00:52:50.280 it

00:52:50.420 clear

00:52:50.660 how

00:52:50.900 you

00:52:51.080 want

00:52:51.260 to

00:52:51.360 go

00:52:51.540 out

00:52:51.840 then

00:52:52.860 you

00:52:52.960 take

00:52:53.140 so

00:52:53.320 much

00:52:53.500 guesswork

00:52:53.980 out

00:52:54.180 of

00:52:54.260 the

00:52:54.400 people

00:52:54.800 who

00:52:54.940 will

00:52:55.080 survive

00:52:55.460 you

00:52:55.680 and

00:52:55.920 you

00:52:56.020 can

00:52:56.160 ease

00:52:56.500 their

00:52:56.720 grief

00:52:57.080 but

00:52:58.360 the

00:52:58.540 third

00:52:58.800 reason

00:52:59.120 to

00:52:59.260 do

00:52:59.420 all

00:52:59.560 this

00:52:59.760 stuff

00:53:00.060 I

00:53:00.180 think

00:53:00.320 it's

00:53:00.460 the

00:53:00.600 best

00:53:00.900 or

00:53:01.020 the

00:53:01.140 biggest

00:53:01.500 or

00:53:01.780 something

00:53:02.200 like

00:53:02.440 that

00:53:02.700 is

00:53:03.680 what

00:53:04.760 we've

00:53:04.980 touched

00:53:05.180 on

00:53:05.440 once

00:53:06.080 you

00:53:06.240 realize

00:53:07.040 you

00:53:07.900 will

00:53:08.180 die

00:53:08.520 at

00:53:08.700 some

00:53:08.880 point

00:53:09.240 you

00:53:10.400 in a

00:53:10.840 sense

00:53:11.040 can

00:53:11.200 start

00:53:11.440 really

00:53:11.700 living

00:53:12.000 and

00:53:13.060 I

00:53:13.200 have

00:53:13.340 seen

00:53:13.540 that

00:53:13.760 play

00:53:14.000 out

00:53:14.160 a

00:53:14.360 zillion

00:53:14.640 times

00:53:15.020 over

00:53:15.240 in

00:53:15.380 my

00:53:15.540 own

00:53:15.780 life

00:53:16.060 and

00:53:16.180 others

00:53:16.660 and

00:53:17.480 so

00:53:17.620 that's

00:53:18.420 the

00:53:18.560 setup

00:53:18.820 that's

00:53:19.140 why

00:53:19.700 prepare

00:53:21.220 otherwise

00:53:21.840 gosh

00:53:22.340 you just

00:53:22.640 say

00:53:22.880 people

00:53:23.960 have been

00:53:24.180 dying

00:53:24.440 forever

00:53:24.880 it's

00:53:25.900 a natural

00:53:26.280 thing

00:53:26.620 when my

00:53:27.080 turn

00:53:27.340 to die

00:53:27.720 I'll

00:53:27.960 die

00:53:30.600 us

00:53:30.780 about

00:53:31.040 this

00:53:31.300 well

00:53:31.520 we

00:53:31.780 need

00:53:31.900 a

00:53:32.040 book

00:53:32.160 to

00:53:32.300 tell

00:53:32.460 us

00:53:32.580 about

00:53:32.780 this

00:53:33.000 because

00:53:33.160 we've

00:53:33.400 invented

00:53:33.940 structures

00:53:35.380 and

00:53:35.740 systems

00:53:36.220 that

00:53:36.920 make

00:53:37.840 certain

00:53:38.580 inevitabilities

00:53:39.560 in life

00:53:40.000 a little

00:53:40.420 inhospitable

00:53:41.620 and shaky

00:53:42.300 and

00:53:42.560 counterintuitive

00:53:43.340 so

00:53:44.160 anyway

00:53:44.780 over to

00:53:45.060 you

00:53:45.200 Shosh

00:53:45.420 maybe

00:53:45.680 on some

00:53:46.060 of the

00:53:46.240 advanced

00:53:46.520 planning

00:53:46.960 and other

00:53:47.280 things

00:53:47.700 sure

00:53:48.960 well

00:53:49.240 is

00:53:49.480 that

00:53:49.900 I

00:53:50.120 just

00:53:50.340 want

00:53:50.460 to

00:53:50.560 make

00:53:50.720 sure

00:53:50.920 we're

00:53:51.220 answering

00:53:51.560 your

00:53:51.780 question

00:53:52.140 here

00:53:52.360 Sam

00:53:52.620 is

00:53:52.860 that

00:53:53.020 really

00:53:53.340 it

00:53:53.660 about

00:53:54.000 like

00:53:54.440 how

00:53:54.860 you

00:53:55.020 prepare

00:53:55.380 yourself

00:53:55.820 for

00:53:56.020 this

00:54:00.600 I

00:54:00.980 think

00:54:01.140 it's

00:54:01.300 natural

00:54:01.760 for

00:54:02.220 people

00:54:02.580 who

00:54:02.920 are

00:54:03.280 healthy

00:54:04.100 right

00:54:04.520 and

00:54:04.920 for

00:54:05.300 whom

00:54:05.540 there's

00:54:06.700 nothing

00:54:07.380 bad

00:54:07.800 on this

00:54:08.100 front

00:54:08.320 has

00:54:08.480 happened

00:54:08.880 yet

00:54:09.380 to

00:54:10.220 want

00:54:11.800 to

00:54:11.960 use

00:54:12.220 that

00:54:12.460 time

00:54:12.900 to

00:54:13.220 think

00:54:13.560 about

00:54:13.900 everything

00:54:15.020 other

00:54:15.620 than

00:54:16.000 planning

00:54:16.900 for

00:54:17.700 the

00:54:18.640 inevitable

00:54:19.000 even

00:54:19.900 if

00:54:20.060 they

00:54:20.260 could

00:54:20.680 pay

00:54:20.820 lip

00:54:21.060 service

00:54:21.360 to

00:54:21.580 the

00:54:21.800 understanding

00:54:22.820 that

00:54:23.200 it

00:54:23.420 is

00:54:23.580 inevitable

00:54:23.960 it's

00:54:24.420 just

00:54:24.680 you

00:54:25.120 know

00:54:25.240 there

00:54:25.380 are

00:54:25.720 many

00:54:25.900 people

00:54:26.180 who

00:54:26.600 don't

00:54:27.000 have

00:54:27.180 wills

00:54:27.740 and

00:54:27.880 even

00:54:28.040 if

00:54:28.200 you

00:54:28.280 have

00:54:28.440 a

00:54:28.600 will

00:54:28.860 that

00:54:29.080 really

00:54:30.600 every

00:54:31.280 aspect

00:54:31.680 of

00:54:31.880 planning

00:54:32.260 you

00:54:33.260 deal

00:54:33.460 with

00:54:33.580 in

00:54:33.660 your

00:54:33.780 book

00:54:34.020 and

00:54:34.140 again

00:54:34.340 the

00:54:34.940 checklist

00:54:36.040 aspect

00:54:36.600 of

00:54:36.940 this

00:54:37.200 I

00:54:37.720 think

00:54:37.840 is

00:54:37.960 best

00:54:38.220 delivered

00:54:38.640 by

00:54:39.060 your

00:54:39.220 book

00:54:39.540 not

00:54:39.760 so

00:54:39.940 much

00:54:40.140 by

00:54:40.400 audio

00:54:40.740 but

00:54:41.000 I

00:54:41.560 think

00:54:41.720 some

00:54:41.920 of

00:54:42.000 the

00:54:42.120 big

00:54:42.480 points

00:54:42.920 are

00:54:43.100 worth

00:54:43.460 talking

00:54:44.240 about

00:54:44.580 for

00:54:44.860 instance

00:54:45.120 the

00:54:45.380 advanced

00:54:46.440 directive

00:54:46.880 I

00:54:47.880 love

00:54:48.340 your

00:54:48.560 take

00:54:49.060 on it

00:54:49.300 as well

00:54:49.560 Shoshana

00:54:49.940 but

00:54:50.180 I'm

00:54:50.780 also

00:54:50.960 wondering

00:54:51.280 if

00:54:51.500 the

00:54:51.720 physician's

00:54:52.560 eye

00:54:52.740 view

00:54:53.160 of

00:54:53.920 death

00:54:54.340 having

00:54:54.780 seen

00:54:55.180 many

00:54:55.560 many

00:54:55.760 people

00:54:56.040 die

00:54:56.540 could

00:55:00.600 resuscitation

00:55:02.220 or

00:55:02.420 not

00:55:02.840 etc

00:55:03.840 well

00:55:05.900 I'm

00:55:06.260 definitely

00:55:06.620 going to

00:55:07.340 hand

00:55:07.640 that

00:55:07.840 one

00:55:08.000 over

00:55:08.180 to

00:55:08.360 BJ

00:55:08.620 but

00:55:09.000 I'll

00:55:09.260 just

00:55:09.480 say

00:55:09.720 from

00:55:10.140 my

00:55:11.060 perspective

00:55:11.520 in

00:55:12.580 writing

00:55:13.100 the

00:55:13.320 book

00:55:13.500 and

00:55:13.680 talking

00:55:14.020 to

00:55:14.240 hundreds

00:55:14.600 of

00:55:14.900 people

00:55:15.320 about

00:55:16.060 how

00:55:17.040 to

00:55:17.280 kind

00:55:17.520 of

00:55:17.680 grapple

00:55:18.140 with

00:55:18.480 this

00:55:18.880 experience

00:55:19.420 it's

00:55:20.540 so

00:55:20.740 taboo

00:55:21.340 in

00:55:21.620 our

00:55:21.740 culture

00:55:22.100 and

00:55:22.560 you're

00:55:23.260 absolutely

00:55:23.560 right

00:55:23.820 we

00:55:24.000 don't

00:55:24.440 want

00:55:24.780 to

00:55:24.900 think

00:55:25.080 about

00:55:25.320 it

00:55:25.440 we

00:55:25.600 don't

00:55:25.920 talk

00:55:26.220 about

00:55:26.480 it

00:55:26.620 we

00:55:26.800 don't

00:55:27.120 have

00:55:27.400 conversations

00:55:28.080 about

00:55:28.580 it

00:55:28.820 we have

00:55:29.460 a

00:55:29.600 colleague

00:55:30.040 Jessica

00:55:30.540 Zitter

00:55:30.820 who

00:55:31.660 is a

00:55:31.920 palliative

00:55:32.200 care

00:55:32.440 doc

00:55:32.760 and

00:55:32.920 an

00:55:33.060 ER

00:55:33.240 doc

00:55:33.580 and

00:55:33.760 she

00:55:34.120 actually

00:55:34.560 wants

00:55:34.860 to

00:55:35.040 institute

00:55:35.620 death

00:55:36.420 ed

00:55:36.860 in

00:55:37.220 schools

00:55:37.840 as a

00:55:38.440 counterpart

00:55:40.880 to

00:55:41.300 sex

00:55:41.580 ed

00:55:41.880 because

00:55:42.620 we

00:55:42.980 really

00:55:43.260 do

00:55:43.480 think

00:55:43.780 that

00:55:44.080 it

00:55:44.720 should

00:55:44.920 be

00:55:45.440 just

00:55:45.900 a

00:55:46.160 conversation

00:55:46.620 that

00:55:46.840 we

00:55:46.940 have

00:55:47.120 throughout

00:55:47.420 life

00:55:47.740 and

00:55:47.880 there

00:55:48.020 are

00:55:48.120 so

00:55:48.300 many

00:55:48.480 different

00:55:48.760 touch

00:55:49.080 points

00:55:49.380 throughout

00:55:49.640 life

00:55:49.960 when

00:55:50.140 it's

00:55:50.300 appropriate

00:55:50.760 like

00:55:51.180 when

00:55:51.480 your

00:55:51.700 kid

00:55:52.180 goes

00:55:52.660 and

00:55:52.920 becomes

00:55:53.500 a

00:55:53.860 driver

00:55:54.180 and

00:55:54.400 takes

00:55:54.600 his

00:55:54.760 driver's

00:55:55.220 test

00:55:55.500 and

00:55:57.140 has

00:55:57.360 to

00:55:57.560 choose

00:55:58.280 whether

00:55:58.500 or not

00:55:58.920 they

00:55:59.260 want

00:55:59.440 to

00:55:59.540 become

00:55:59.780 an

00:55:59.940 organ

00:56:00.160 donor

00:56:00.540 great

00:56:03.040 opportunity

00:56:03.760 to start

00:56:04.360 talking

00:56:04.740 about

00:56:05.140 yes

00:56:06.540 there is

00:56:07.020 a

00:56:07.200 possibility

00:56:08.200 that

00:56:08.560 when

00:56:08.720 you

00:56:08.840 get

00:56:09.000 behind

00:56:09.300 that

00:56:09.520 wheel

00:56:09.820 you

00:56:10.320 will

00:56:11.440 get

00:56:11.680 in

00:56:11.840 an

00:56:12.020 accident

00:56:12.340 and

00:56:12.680 let's

00:56:12.960 think

00:56:13.180 about

00:56:13.920 what

00:56:14.680 you

00:56:14.880 might

00:56:15.160 offer

00:56:16.700 the

00:56:16.980 world

00:56:17.380 in

00:56:18.100 a

00:56:18.220 very

00:56:18.400 generous

00:56:18.720 way

00:56:19.220 if

00:56:19.480 that

00:56:19.660 happens

00:56:20.240 so

00:56:20.880 there's

00:56:21.220 so

00:56:21.700 many

00:56:22.060 opening

00:56:22.780 gambits

00:56:23.340 throughout

00:56:23.640 life

00:56:24.140 when

00:56:24.760 you

00:56:24.880 can

00:56:25.000 have

00:56:25.180 this

00:56:25.360 conversation

00:56:25.840 but

00:56:26.100 I'll

00:56:26.240 just

00:56:26.400 say

00:56:26.580 that

00:56:26.780 there

00:56:27.020 are

00:56:28.020 a

00:56:28.220 couple

00:56:28.460 of

00:56:28.680 different

00:56:28.920 things

00:56:29.180 we

00:56:29.320 talk

00:56:29.560 about

00:56:29.780 in

00:56:29.880 the

00:56:30.000 book

00:56:30.280 and

00:56:30.440 one

00:56:30.780 is

00:56:31.320 the

00:56:32.280 kind

00:56:32.500 of

00:56:32.620 material

00:56:33.300 mess

00:56:33.780 that

00:56:34.020 we

00:56:34.180 accumulate

00:56:34.700 in

00:56:35.260 life

00:56:35.680 and

00:56:35.980 how

00:56:36.260 to

00:56:36.780 deal

00:56:37.660 with

00:56:37.900 that

00:56:38.340 because

00:56:39.220 of

00:56:39.700 course

00:56:39.840 you

00:56:40.000 hand

00:56:40.340 all

00:56:40.600 of

00:56:40.740 that

00:56:40.920 down

00:56:41.380 to

00:56:41.780 the

00:56:42.060 people

00:56:42.460 who

00:56:43.200 you

00:56:43.940 love

00:56:44.400 and

00:56:44.980 it's

00:56:45.780 a lot

00:56:46.260 and

00:56:46.900 there's

00:56:47.120 this

00:56:47.320 great

00:56:48.140 Swedish

00:56:48.660 notion

00:56:49.220 of

00:56:49.540 death

00:56:50.060 cleaning

00:56:50.480 that

00:56:50.860 as you

00:56:51.240 get

00:56:51.380 older

00:56:51.680 you

00:56:51.920 should

00:56:52.180 go

00:56:53.140 through

00:56:53.440 your

00:56:53.680 material

00:56:54.500 world

00:56:55.480 and

00:56:55.720 decide

00:56:56.200 what

00:56:56.860 you

00:56:57.380 need

00:56:57.840 and

00:56:58.000 what

00:56:58.180 you

00:56:58.320 can

00:56:58.520 give

00:56:58.740 up

00:56:58.920 because

00:56:59.440 you

00:57:00.240 don't

00:57:00.380 want

00:57:00.520 to

00:57:00.620 pass

00:57:00.840 that

00:57:01.040 along

00:57:01.340 you

00:57:01.480 don't

00:57:01.620 want

00:57:01.740 to

00:57:01.820 pass

00:57:02.020 that

00:57:02.220 mess

00:57:02.420 along

00:57:02.780 it's

00:57:03.240 a lot

00:57:03.680 to

00:57:03.840 get

00:57:04.000 through

00:57:04.320 for

00:57:04.600 the

00:57:04.740 people

00:57:04.960 you

00:57:05.120 love

00:57:05.340 and

00:57:05.460 then

00:57:05.620 there's

00:57:06.420 of

00:57:06.620 course

00:57:06.800 the

00:57:06.960 emotional

00:57:07.500 mess

00:57:08.080 that

00:57:08.320 we

00:57:08.460 create

00:57:08.800 in

00:57:08.980 life

00:57:09.320 as

00:57:09.600 human

00:57:09.900 beings

00:57:10.360 which

00:57:10.720 is

00:57:11.120 much

00:57:12.120 more

00:57:12.360 complicated

00:57:12.980 but

00:57:14.180 that

00:57:14.680 is

00:57:15.020 where

00:57:15.300 the

00:57:15.520 meat

00:57:15.760 is

00:57:16.220 thinking

00:57:18.060 about

00:57:18.760 your

00:57:19.620 relationships

00:57:20.260 and

00:57:21.320 whether

00:57:21.680 or not

00:57:22.100 you

00:57:22.360 have

00:57:22.980 resolved

00:57:24.720 old

00:57:26.160 disputes

00:57:26.980 people

00:57:28.700 in your

00:57:29.360 life

00:57:29.720 what do

00:57:30.140 they need

00:57:30.460 to hear

00:57:30.900 from you

00:57:31.520 how

00:57:33.620 are you

00:57:35.360 feeding

00:57:36.220 and watering

00:57:36.780 your

00:57:37.040 relationships

00:57:37.640 throughout

00:57:38.040 life

00:57:38.440 and

00:57:38.920 Ira

00:57:40.100 Bayak

00:57:40.580 another

00:57:40.940 palliative

00:57:41.420 care

00:57:41.640 physician

00:57:42.100 who we

00:57:42.800 interviewed

00:57:43.060 for this

00:57:43.480 book

00:57:43.720 has this

00:57:44.180 beautiful

00:57:44.520 framework

00:57:45.000 of

00:57:45.760 saying

00:57:46.440 the

00:57:46.640 four

00:57:46.840 things

00:57:47.200 that

00:57:47.400 matter

00:57:47.640 most

00:57:48.360 at

00:57:49.100 the

00:57:49.240 end

00:57:49.380 of

00:57:49.520 life

00:57:49.900 and

00:57:50.280 those

00:57:50.660 things

00:57:51.080 are

00:57:51.580 please

00:57:52.580 forgive

00:57:52.920 me

00:57:53.320 I

00:57:54.160 forgive

00:57:54.560 you

00:57:55.020 thank

00:57:56.460 you

00:57:56.860 and

00:57:57.760 I

00:57:57.980 love

00:57:58.220 you

00:57:58.520 and

00:57:59.620 you

00:58:00.120 know

00:58:00.200 he

00:58:00.300 says

00:58:00.520 that

00:58:00.700 just

00:58:01.000 saying

00:58:01.440 those

00:58:01.820 things

00:58:02.520 can

00:58:03.080 really

00:58:03.580 unburden

00:58:05.040 the

00:58:05.680 people

00:58:06.120 around

00:58:06.640 you

00:58:07.080 and

00:58:07.360 feeling

00:58:07.720 like

00:58:08.060 they

00:58:08.360 have

00:58:08.880 they've

00:58:09.820 come

00:58:10.000 to

00:58:10.200 terms

00:58:10.720 with

00:58:11.200 letting

00:58:12.560 you

00:58:12.840 go

00:58:13.220 and

00:58:14.520 feeling

00:58:14.880 resolved

00:58:15.320 about

00:58:15.640 that

00:58:15.940 and

00:58:16.100 we

00:58:16.580 actually

00:58:16.880 asked

00:58:17.240 him

00:58:17.460 Ira

00:58:17.720 it's

00:58:18.400 been

00:58:18.560 10

00:58:18.780 years

00:58:18.960 since

00:58:19.160 you

00:58:19.280 wrote

00:58:19.440 that

00:58:19.600 book

00:58:19.780 is there

00:58:20.140 anything

00:58:20.840 else

00:58:21.200 you'd

00:58:21.400 add

00:58:21.500 to

00:58:21.640 that

00:58:21.820 list

00:58:22.120 and

00:58:22.300 he

00:58:22.420 said

00:58:22.800 you

00:58:23.780 know

00:58:23.880 actually

00:58:24.140 there

00:58:24.360 is

00:58:24.580 I

00:58:25.020 talked

00:58:25.560 to

00:58:25.900 60

00:58:26.680 year

00:58:26.880 old

00:58:27.060 men

00:58:27.460 who

00:58:28.360 are

00:58:28.600 still

00:58:29.140 carrying

00:58:29.720 around

00:58:30.400 the

00:58:31.640 wish

00:58:31.980 that

00:58:32.240 their

00:58:32.460 dead

00:58:32.760 fathers

00:58:33.220 had

00:58:33.460 said

00:58:33.680 to

00:58:33.820 them

00:58:34.060 I'm

00:58:34.320 so

00:58:34.520 proud

00:58:34.820 of

00:58:35.000 you

00:58:35.200 and

00:58:36.700 you

00:58:37.660 know

00:58:37.780 so

00:58:38.040 I've

00:58:39.220 really

00:58:39.500 built

00:58:40.040 that

00:58:40.280 into

00:58:40.620 the

00:58:41.340 way

00:58:41.520 that

00:58:41.660 I

00:58:41.820 raise

00:58:42.140 my

00:58:42.340 kids

00:58:42.600 just

00:58:42.840 taking

00:58:43.160 every

00:58:43.560 opportunity

00:58:44.160 to

00:58:44.620 tell

00:58:45.300 them

00:58:45.680 how

00:58:46.380 proud

00:58:46.640 of

00:58:46.780 them

00:58:46.980 I

00:58:47.160 am

00:58:47.520 and

00:58:47.780 you

00:58:48.220 know

00:58:48.300 I

00:58:48.420 think

00:58:48.600 we

00:58:48.740 just

00:58:49.120 we

00:58:50.520 again

00:58:51.080 just

00:58:51.440 you

00:58:52.040 know

00:58:52.160 returning

00:58:52.640 to

00:58:53.140 this

00:58:53.660 moment

00:58:54.040 is

00:58:54.320 the

00:58:54.500 only

00:58:54.740 moment

00:58:55.280 that

00:58:55.620 we

00:58:55.760 can

00:58:55.940 be

00:58:56.140 sure

00:58:56.400 of

00:58:56.800 knowing

00:58:58.420 that

00:58:58.780 you

00:58:59.020 are

00:58:59.240 expressing

00:58:59.660 the

00:58:59.900 things

00:59:00.120 that

00:59:00.280 you

00:59:00.400 need

00:59:00.600 to

00:59:00.760 express

00:59:01.340 and

00:59:02.000 and

00:59:02.700 then

00:59:02.820 all

00:59:02.960 the

00:59:03.080 paperwork

00:59:03.480 stuff

00:59:03.860 you're

00:59:04.040 right

00:59:04.220 Sam

00:59:04.520 we

00:59:04.980 cover

00:59:05.280 off

00:59:05.520 in

00:59:05.620 the

00:59:05.720 book

00:59:05.880 we

00:59:06.000 actually

00:59:06.260 have

00:59:06.500 this

00:59:06.780 notion

00:59:07.260 of

00:59:07.520 a

00:59:07.680 when

00:59:07.920 I

00:59:08.100 die

00:59:08.380 file

00:59:08.880 which

00:59:09.740 has

00:59:09.940 like

00:59:10.100 20

00:59:10.380 things

00:59:10.820 in it

00:59:11.140 that

00:59:11.320 you

00:59:11.620 want

00:59:12.140 to

00:59:12.260 put

00:59:12.400 in

00:59:12.520 there

00:59:12.680 and

00:59:12.800 that

00:59:12.940 can

00:59:13.080 be

00:59:13.220 in

00:59:13.320 a

00:59:13.440 shoebox

00:59:13.980 or

00:59:14.180 on

00:59:15.780 the

00:59:15.920 cloud

00:59:16.240 wherever

00:59:16.640 but

00:59:16.980 you

00:59:17.900 know

00:59:18.020 it's

00:59:18.180 a

00:59:18.280 place

00:59:18.580 where

00:59:18.920 your

00:59:19.240 family

00:59:19.560 can

00:59:19.780 go

00:59:20.040 to

00:59:20.280 find

00:59:20.620 all

00:59:20.920 of

00:59:21.080 the

00:59:21.280 logistical

00:59:21.840 stuff

00:59:22.380 that

00:59:22.640 just

00:59:22.900 traps

00:59:24.000 people

00:59:24.380 up

00:59:24.600 when

00:59:24.780 they're

00:59:24.940 in

00:59:25.040 the

00:59:25.180 thick

00:59:25.360 of

00:59:25.520 grief

00:59:25.840 and

00:59:26.020 they

00:59:26.180 can't

00:59:26.420 even

00:59:26.580 think

00:59:26.900 straight

00:59:27.300 and

00:59:27.660 they

00:59:27.860 just

00:59:28.120 need

00:59:28.440 very

00:59:29.200 clear

00:59:29.620 instructions

00:59:30.200 for

00:59:30.840 how

00:59:31.500 to

00:59:31.920 shut

00:59:32.400 down

00:59:32.620 a

00:59:32.760 life

00:59:33.040 BJ

00:59:34.300 before

00:59:34.560 you

00:59:34.840 give

00:59:35.140 us

00:59:35.300 the

00:59:35.580 DNR

00:59:36.860 particulars

00:59:37.500 I

00:59:38.260 forget

00:59:38.540 if

00:59:38.720 you

00:59:38.920 mention

00:59:40.140 this

00:59:40.400 in

00:59:40.520 the

00:59:40.660 book

00:59:41.020 do

00:59:41.620 we

00:59:41.780 know

00:59:42.220 the

00:59:42.780 statistics

00:59:43.260 on

00:59:43.740 just

00:59:44.460 what

00:59:44.720 percentage

00:59:45.120 of

00:59:45.320 people

00:59:45.700 die

00:59:47.040 suddenly

00:59:47.640 and

00:59:48.100 bypass

00:59:48.980 any

00:59:49.800 need

00:59:50.060 for

00:59:50.220 advice

00:59:50.620 around

00:59:51.160 how

00:59:52.180 to

00:59:52.320 navigate

00:59:52.680 a

00:59:52.920 terminal

00:59:53.240 illness

00:59:54.100 I

00:59:54.400 mean

00:59:54.480 they're

00:59:54.640 just

00:59:54.800 I

00:59:55.120 guess

00:59:55.280 this

00:59:55.460 is

00:59:55.940 more

00:59:56.380 or

00:59:56.500 less

00:59:56.660 cardiac

00:59:57.260 events

00:59:57.840 and

00:59:58.100 accidents

00:59:58.920 we're

00:59:59.180 talking

00:59:59.420 about

00:59:59.640 here

00:59:59.800 but

01:00:00.100 do

01:00:00.460 we

01:00:00.580 know

01:00:00.880 what

01:00:01.220 the

01:00:01.420 percentages

01:00:01.780 are

01:00:02.060 the

01:00:02.760 data

01:00:03.480 that

01:00:03.720 I've

01:00:04.120 seen

01:00:04.780 referenced

01:00:05.420 I

01:00:06.300 have

01:00:06.500 to

01:00:06.640 say

01:00:06.840 I

01:00:07.000 haven't

01:00:07.220 chased

01:00:07.520 it

01:00:07.680 down

01:00:07.940 to

01:00:08.160 its

01:00:08.380 source

01:00:08.780 but

01:00:09.440 the

01:00:09.600 data

01:00:09.820 I've

01:00:10.020 seen

01:00:10.220 referenced

01:00:10.820 around

01:00:11.180 your

01:00:11.420 question

01:00:11.820 Sam

01:00:12.180 is

01:00:12.560 and

01:00:13.340 it

01:00:13.480 mirrors

01:00:13.780 my

01:00:14.140 own

01:00:15.220 experience

01:00:15.680 and

01:00:15.860 my

01:00:16.020 practice

01:00:16.420 but

01:00:16.800 maybe

01:00:17.980 10

01:00:18.460 to

01:00:18.620 20

01:00:19.020 percent

01:00:19.440 of

01:00:19.700 people

01:00:20.160 can

01:00:21.020 look

01:00:21.240 forward

01:00:21.560 to

01:00:21.780 that

01:00:22.060 sort

01:00:22.360 of

01:00:22.480 spontaneous

01:00:23.080 death

01:00:23.800 where

01:00:24.620 they're

01:00:24.960 fully

01:00:25.540 alive

01:00:25.940 one

01:00:26.160 moment

01:00:26.520 and

01:00:26.760 whammo

01:00:27.640 gone

01:00:28.060 and

01:00:29.420 there's

01:00:29.820 not

01:00:30.100 much

01:00:30.380 in

01:00:30.540 between

01:00:30.840 space

01:00:31.400 and

01:00:32.120 that

01:00:32.260 number

01:00:32.600 is

01:00:32.800 shrinking

01:00:33.140 in

01:00:34.160 part

01:00:34.460 due

01:00:34.660 to

01:00:34.800 the

01:00:34.940 advances

01:00:35.320 of

01:00:35.560 medicine

01:00:35.880 we're

01:00:36.140 able

01:00:36.360 to

01:00:36.560 keep

01:00:36.780 people

01:00:37.180 alive

01:00:37.560 myself

01:00:37.920 as

01:00:38.240 one

01:00:38.400 of

01:00:39.120 them

01:00:39.260 we

01:00:39.720 can

01:00:39.940 keep

01:00:40.140 folks

01:00:40.440 alive

01:00:40.980 but

01:00:41.920 not

01:00:42.160 unscathed

01:00:43.240 and so

01:00:43.660 a lot

01:00:43.960 of

01:00:44.080 people

01:00:44.420 now

01:00:44.840 a lot

01:00:45.120 of

01:00:45.240 illnesses

01:00:45.560 that

01:00:45.880 were

01:00:46.120 immediately

01:00:47.000 terminal

01:00:47.640 nowadays

01:00:48.900 are

01:00:49.240 chronic

01:00:49.660 at least

01:00:50.520 for many

01:00:50.920 years

01:00:51.420 so

01:00:52.420 another

01:00:52.900 thing

01:00:53.280 that

01:00:53.480 the

01:00:53.800 book

01:00:54.060 steps

01:00:54.600 into

01:00:54.940 or

01:00:55.180 our

01:00:55.420 time

01:00:55.860 steps

01:00:56.240 into

01:00:56.540 is

01:00:56.780 this

01:00:56.960 moment

01:00:57.280 where

01:00:57.940 science

01:00:58.660 and

01:00:58.820 medical

01:00:59.020 science

01:00:59.340 has

01:00:59.520 advanced

01:00:59.980 and

01:01:01.040 it's

01:01:01.340 smeared

01:01:02.760 or

01:01:03.040 protracted

01:01:03.940 this

01:01:04.160 dying

01:01:04.580 phase

01:01:05.140 and

01:01:05.960 that

01:01:06.180 has

01:01:06.500 lots

01:01:07.040 of

01:01:07.200 consequences

01:01:07.760 so

01:01:08.140 for

01:01:09.140 good

01:01:09.440 and

01:01:09.640 for

01:01:10.040 ill

01:01:10.360 we

01:01:10.960 live

01:01:12.240 with

01:01:12.680 this

01:01:12.900 thing

01:01:13.140 that

01:01:13.320 will

01:01:13.480 cause

01:01:13.780 our

01:01:13.960 death

01:01:14.260 oftentimes

01:01:14.800 for

01:01:15.120 many

01:01:15.320 years

01:01:15.680 and

01:01:15.900 so

01:01:16.100 more

01:01:16.880 and

01:01:17.040 more

01:01:17.220 of

01:01:17.340 us

01:01:17.480 are

01:01:17.620 dying

01:01:17.880 from

01:01:18.120 chronic

01:01:18.460 illness

01:01:18.860 that

01:01:19.240 will

01:01:19.420 very

01:01:19.760 likely

01:01:20.220 it is

01:01:20.620 right

01:01:20.780 now

01:01:20.980 very

01:01:21.240 likely

01:01:21.560 the

01:01:21.760 reason

01:01:22.020 the

01:01:22.400 way

01:01:22.640 you

01:01:22.980 or

01:01:23.240 I

01:01:23.420 will

01:01:23.600 die

01:01:23.900 and

01:01:24.820 that

01:01:25.020 number

01:01:25.340 is

01:01:25.620 growing

01:01:25.940 as

01:01:26.480 the

01:01:26.680 population

01:01:27.220 ages

01:01:27.580 so

01:01:27.880 these

01:01:28.460 issues

01:01:28.740 are

01:01:28.920 becoming

01:01:29.240 more

01:01:29.580 and more

01:01:30.020 important

01:01:31.040 or

01:01:31.440 powerful

01:01:32.820 and in

01:01:33.980 the coming

01:01:34.560 decades

01:01:34.980 they will

01:01:35.340 continue

01:01:35.800 to swell

01:01:36.460 aging

01:01:37.860 dying

01:01:38.380 is going

01:01:38.720 to be

01:01:39.000 increasingly

01:01:39.540 in our

01:01:39.960 face

01:01:43.140 so

01:01:44.540 with that

01:01:45.600 another

01:01:45.860 reason

01:01:46.520 to pay

01:01:47.020 attention

01:01:47.440 to this

01:01:48.120 stuff

01:01:48.700 now

01:01:49.200 as

01:01:50.500 you're

01:01:51.060 talking

01:01:51.460 and reminded

01:01:52.020 too

01:01:52.300 of one

01:01:52.520 of the

01:01:52.700 joys

01:01:52.980 of

01:01:53.220 this

01:01:54.340 work

01:01:54.660 that

01:01:54.840 we

01:01:55.040 did

01:01:55.240 together

01:01:55.660 or do

01:01:56.040 together

01:01:56.460 there's

01:01:58.080 also

01:01:58.260 just

01:01:58.520 the

01:01:58.700 magic

01:01:59.040 like

01:01:59.320 you're

01:01:59.520 doing

01:01:59.800 with

01:02:00.000 us

01:02:00.200 today

01:02:00.480 Sam

01:02:00.840 of

01:02:01.000 just

01:02:01.260 talking

01:02:01.740 about

01:02:02.100 these

01:02:02.380 things

01:02:02.740 and

01:02:03.040 you

01:02:03.160 have

01:02:03.360 done

01:02:03.560 such

01:02:03.800 a

01:02:03.940 beautiful

01:02:04.160 job

01:02:04.600 before

01:02:05.000 us

01:02:05.280 too

01:02:05.520 I

01:02:05.680 mean

01:02:05.760 this

01:02:05.960 subject

01:02:06.260 is

01:02:06.540 not

01:02:06.860 a

01:02:07.980 stranger

01:02:08.420 on

01:02:08.780 your

01:02:09.040 work

01:02:09.900 and

01:02:10.340 that's

01:02:10.640 beautiful

01:02:11.100 just

01:02:13.140 pulling

01:02:13.560 things

01:02:13.900 out

01:02:14.080 of

01:02:14.160 a

01:02:14.300 closet

01:02:14.640 and

01:02:16.020 you

01:02:16.740 know

01:02:16.820 one

01:02:17.040 thing

01:02:17.240 I

01:02:17.360 kind

01:02:17.560 of

01:02:17.640 want

01:02:17.820 to

01:02:17.940 get

01:02:18.120 out

01:02:18.340 there

01:02:18.700 I'm

01:02:19.440 going

01:02:19.780 around

01:02:20.000 here

01:02:20.260 non-linearly

01:02:21.140 but

01:02:21.360 you

01:02:22.200 know

01:02:22.340 as

01:02:22.540 you're

01:02:22.740 referencing

01:02:23.260 a moment

01:02:23.740 ago

01:02:24.080 about

01:02:24.380 there are

01:02:24.880 some

01:02:25.060 important

01:02:25.360 differences

01:02:25.840 between

01:02:26.280 living

01:02:26.580 and

01:02:26.800 dying

01:02:27.080 and

01:02:28.540 I'll

01:02:28.900 just

01:02:29.060 say

01:02:29.220 I'll

01:02:29.540 jump

01:02:29.720 to

01:02:29.920 what

01:02:30.960 feels

01:02:31.260 to

01:02:31.420 me

01:02:31.580 like

01:02:31.800 really

01:02:32.080 good

01:02:32.380 news

01:02:32.740 and

01:02:32.920 good

01:02:33.420 news

01:02:33.660 observation

01:02:34.240 a lot

01:02:34.640 of

01:02:34.720 this

01:02:34.900 is

01:02:35.100 that

01:02:35.300 a lot

01:02:35.900 of

01:02:36.000 the

01:02:36.240 what

01:02:36.840 feel

01:02:37.240 like

01:02:37.480 neurosing

01:02:38.040 around

01:02:38.740 regret

01:02:39.540 and

01:02:39.860 getting

01:02:40.120 it

01:02:40.300 right

01:02:40.640 and

01:02:41.280 learning

01:02:42.180 how

01:02:42.460 to

01:02:42.640 heed

01:02:43.100 or

01:02:43.320 pay

01:02:43.600 attention

01:02:44.080 or

01:02:44.420 quiet

01:02:45.220 our

01:02:45.420 critic

01:02:45.940 all

01:02:46.400 the

01:02:46.600 things

01:02:46.900 that

01:02:47.080 we

01:02:47.260 kind

01:02:47.460 of

01:02:48.200 frantically

01:02:48.820 do

01:02:49.420 to

01:02:49.880 ourselves

01:02:50.320 and

01:02:50.540 to

01:02:50.680 each

01:02:50.900 other

01:02:51.180 when

01:02:51.940 we

01:02:52.140 have

01:02:52.420 this

01:02:52.600 sort

01:02:52.800 of

01:02:52.960 open

01:02:53.760 ended

01:02:53.960 life

01:02:54.320 in

01:02:54.520 front

01:02:54.700 of

01:02:54.820 us

01:02:55.020 in

01:02:56.000 some

01:02:56.200 ways

01:02:56.360 that's

01:02:56.680 the

01:02:56.800 hard

01:02:57.020 part

01:02:57.400 that's

01:02:58.500 you

01:02:58.960 know

01:02:59.080 I

01:02:59.280 wouldn't

01:02:59.660 but

01:02:59.880 by the

01:03:00.300 time

01:03:00.600 someone

01:03:01.000 is

01:03:01.380 actually

01:03:01.900 dying

01:03:02.380 you

01:03:02.720 know

01:03:02.820 in

01:03:02.940 their

01:03:03.080 final

01:03:07.240 fall

01:03:07.560 apart

01:03:08.020 bit

01:03:08.680 by

01:03:08.860 bit

01:03:09.160 and

01:03:09.820 dying

01:03:10.140 in

01:03:10.320 some

01:03:10.540 ways

01:03:10.720 has

01:03:10.880 already

01:03:11.140 begun

01:03:11.520 they've

01:03:12.440 already

01:03:12.700 said

01:03:12.980 a lot

01:03:13.260 of

01:03:13.360 goodbyes

01:03:14.000 when

01:03:14.780 you're

01:03:14.960 kind

01:03:15.180 of

01:03:15.660 shaken

01:03:16.140 down

01:03:16.660 by

01:03:16.960 that

01:03:17.340 chronic

01:03:18.260 process

01:03:19.000 you know

01:03:20.340 one of

01:03:20.600 the things

01:03:20.840 that often

01:03:21.340 goes

01:03:21.660 especially

01:03:22.040 if you

01:03:22.300 have

01:03:22.420 some

01:03:22.620 loving

01:03:22.880 support

01:03:23.320 around

01:03:23.580 you

01:03:23.760 are

01:03:24.020 you

01:03:24.480 know

01:03:24.580 I

01:03:24.740 don't

01:03:24.920 hear

01:03:25.180 a lot

01:03:25.400 of

01:03:25.500 people

01:03:25.720 in

01:03:25.820 their

01:03:25.920 death

01:03:26.120 beds

01:03:26.420 wailing

01:03:26.780 about

01:03:27.160 regrets

01:03:27.560 actually

01:03:28.080 I

01:03:28.660 hear

01:03:28.740 a lot

01:03:28.900 of

01:03:29.060 folks

01:03:29.360 at

01:03:29.540 the

01:03:29.660 time

01:03:29.860 of

01:03:29.980 diagnosis

01:03:30.480 wailing

01:03:30.900 about

01:03:31.200 regret

01:03:31.620 that's

01:03:32.700 an

01:03:32.800 important

01:03:33.060 difference

01:03:33.460 so I

01:03:33.740 just

01:03:33.880 want to

01:03:34.220 kind

01:03:34.360 of

01:03:34.440 note

01:03:34.680 that

01:03:34.920 there's

01:03:35.100 some

01:03:35.240 good

01:03:35.440 news

01:03:35.720 here

01:03:35.960 that

01:03:36.160 I

01:03:36.320 think

01:03:36.500 in

01:03:36.640 some

01:03:36.860 ways

01:03:37.220 living

01:03:37.960 is

01:03:38.240 the

01:03:38.460 harder

01:03:38.780 part

01:03:39.640 or

01:03:41.000 some

01:03:41.260 ways

01:03:41.440 more

01:03:41.640 complicated

01:03:42.240 dying

01:03:43.460 can

01:03:43.720 really

01:03:44.100 bring

01:03:44.380 us

01:03:44.560 down

01:03:44.780 to

01:03:44.940 the

01:03:45.080 essentials

01:03:45.500 and

01:03:45.880 distill

01:03:46.360 life

01:03:46.860 and

01:03:47.040 make

01:03:47.240 it

01:03:47.380 very

01:03:47.720 obvious

01:03:48.560 in

01:03:48.820 some

01:03:49.020 ways

01:03:49.320 so

01:03:49.760 let

01:03:50.060 that

01:03:50.220 be

01:03:50.360 good

01:03:50.560 news

01:03:50.940 that's

01:03:51.740 interesting

01:03:51.980 meanwhile

01:03:52.540 I've

01:03:53.540 actually

01:03:53.720 never

01:03:53.960 heard

01:03:54.280 that

01:03:54.560 point

01:03:55.020 made

01:03:55.420 and

01:03:55.580 it

01:03:55.840 seems

01:03:57.420 intuitively

01:03:58.040 right

01:03:59.160 do you

01:03:59.840 have an

01:04:00.060 explanation

01:04:00.400 for it

01:04:01.460 well

01:04:01.980 I

01:04:02.380 don't

01:04:03.120 say

01:04:03.660 that

01:04:03.880 not a

01:04:04.240 scientific

01:04:04.640 if you'd

01:04:06.160 like to

01:04:06.420 continue

01:04:06.700 listening to

01:04:07.160 this

01:04:07.320 conversation

01:04:07.880 you'll

01:04:08.580 need to

01:04:08.840 subscribe

01:04:09.320 at

01:04:09.540 samharris.org

01:04:10.460 once you

01:04:11.520 do you'll

01:04:11.880 get access

01:04:12.260 to all

01:04:12.660 full-length

01:04:13.160 episodes of

01:04:13.700 the making

01:04:13.960 sense

01:04:14.200 podcast

01:04:14.560 along with

01:04:15.580 other

01:04:15.760 subscriber

01:04:16.280 only

01:04:16.540 content

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01:04:18.240 episodes

01:04:18.840 and

01:04:19.320 amas

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01:04:20.940 i've been

01:04:21.280 having on

01:04:21.660 the waking

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01:04:22.420 the making

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Making Sense - Sam Harris - September 23, 2022

#297 — Preparing for the End

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Transcript