Nephilim Death Squad - February 27, 2026


David’s Story： The Experiences That Changed Everything

Topics
schizophrenia fascination my infamous black baby story
Hosted by
David Lee Corbo Top Lobsta
Mentioned
Barbara Elizabeth David Lee Roth Aunt Margaret Schizophrenic Aunt Lisa Chrome New Jersey Bruce Lee Carteret John I. I Top Lobster Productions George Washington Joseph Medwick Park Vicki Joy Anderson Joe Medwick Park Warren Ako Park A. A. Closing Abraham Lincoln I. Occasionally Joaquin Phoenix and 25 more
Live From the End Times｜ Neph 2 America Inverted World w⧸ Shane Cashman

Episode Stats


Length

2 hours and 52 minutes

Words per minute

157.52

Word count

27,208

Sentence count

2,739

Harmful content

Misogyny

90

sentences flagged

Toxicity

481

sentences flagged

Hate speech

71

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

David's Story is a series of interviews with people who have shared their stories of growing up in a broken family, and how they came to be who they are today. In this episode, David shares his story of how he became homeless at the age of 14, how he went from being raised by a Polish immigrant grandmother to becoming a homeless man, and what it was like growing up on the streets of New Jersey.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.000 Imagine if today was the day your idea changed someone's life.
00:00:03.660 Imagine if you could help someone pay for college,
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00:00:11.540 With GoFundMe, it's all possible.
00:00:13.820 GoFundMe is the world's number one fundraising platform
00:00:16.600 trusted by over 190 million people.
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00:00:23.980 Your ideas matter.
00:00:25.360 GoFundMe isn't just for emergencies.
00:00:27.020 Want to raise money for your kid's soccer team,
00:00:29.460 or raise funds for a small business, a creative project, or event?
00:00:33.360 GoFundMe helps you turn ideas into reality.
00:00:36.200 And help adds up.
00:00:37.180 Fundraisers you start for someone else raise up to five times more.
00:00:40.620 So think right now, who could use your help?
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00:00:45.340 It comes from someone deciding,
00:00:46.900 today I'll start.
00:00:48.260 Don't wait for someone else to bring change.
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00:01:02.040 No.
00:01:03.020 No, you messed up, man.
00:01:03.940 You got to fix it.
00:01:06.040 You got to...
00:01:07.340 You don't want to do it like this?
00:01:08.800 No, you got to do the intro.
00:01:10.520 All right.
00:01:10.840 You got to press the intro.
00:01:11.760 We'll do the intro.
00:01:13.740 Top Lobs of Productions.
00:01:14.900 Top Lobs of Productions.
00:01:19.340 Top Lobs of Productions.
00:01:23.860 They never went away, they're still here today
00:01:34.860 Nevalum Death Squad
00:01:36.860 When the last trumpet sounds and the heavens crack
00:01:42.860 Nevalum Death Squad
00:01:46.860 Nevalum Death Squad
00:01:49.860 Death Squad
00:02:01.860 Death Squad
00:02:05.860 Welcome back guys. We're going to do something a little bit different here today.
00:02:08.860 As you can see, the name of the episode is David's Story.
00:02:13.860 I guess I'll jump straight into what we're doing and why we're doing it.
00:02:17.860 What we're doing is we're trying to create a sort of a linear story that is comprised of all the strange happenings in my life in my childhood and also in my family.
00:02:35.860 So it'll be their stories. It'll be my stories.
00:02:39.860 And ultimately, I'm hoping that I can turn this into a book.
00:02:45.860 So admittedly, what we're going to do is we're going to use AI to kind of say, how would this be structured?
00:02:49.860 How would this be structured? These stories? How would how would how should this be structured in chapters?
00:02:55.860 If you're paying attention, please focus lock in AI.
00:02:59.860 And then I'm going to type it up ultimately, because it would be a shame to make an AI generated book out of out of these stories.
00:03:06.860 But these last couple of days, some of you may have heard me on the show previously talk about this this woman named Barbara.
00:03:15.860 Barbara was sort of my grandmother, not biological, but from the ages of six to 14, she she raised me and she was an interesting character.
00:03:28.860 Polish woman from Elizabeth, New Jersey. And she I was telling top before the show started that, you know, even back in like 96 or 97, I remember sitting on the porch with her and she'd go, David.
00:03:41.860 David, look up. Look, you see the clouds that are left behind from the planes.
00:03:45.860 They don't disappear, David. They don't disappear. It didn't used to be like this.
00:03:50.860 And, you know, she had all these stories that she would share with me, but.
00:03:58.860 I guess the way it went was my my mother was dating her son for a long time, so my mom and dad got separated when I was real little and around the age of six, she got together with this guy.
00:04:10.860 He moved in. His family kind of became my family. And.
00:04:13.860 I mean, years later, eight years later, they separated when they separated.
00:04:20.860 I I just kind of didn't have a.
00:04:27.860 I didn't have a connection to these. I was only 14 years old when that happened.
00:04:31.860 2004, I didn't have a cell phone or any of those things, so.
00:04:34.860 And then only, you know, a few years later, I would be homeless by the ages of 17.
00:04:41.860 I was homeless. So needless to say, my life took me in a direction where, like, I just lost contact with these people, which is weird.
00:04:49.860 In hindsight, it's a strange upbringing and.
00:04:56.860 Something came over me maybe three days ago, four days ago.
00:05:01.860 And I wanted to reach out to her.
00:05:04.860 I just had this thing weighing on me to reach out to her.
00:05:06.860 And, you know, I had this lexicon of phone numbers that I still remember in my head from childhood.
00:05:13.860 So I thought I had it, man, like I was pretty sure I remembered her number.
00:05:19.860 And I called it up and.
00:05:21.860 You know, I got that this this line is disconnected thing, and I went through the time again.
00:05:27.860 I got a different number and that one was disconnected, too.
00:05:31.860 And and I started taking to Google and the white pages and I'm trying to find this woman's number over and over again.
00:05:40.860 I'm just getting nothing.
00:05:41.860 And I started to get, you know, if Matt was here, he'd make fun of me because I started to get kind of this heavy spirit.
00:05:50.860 I was afraid that.
00:05:52.860 Yeah, I was afraid she had passed.
00:05:54.860 You know, I'm going through the Internet, I'm going through Google and I'm finding, you know, mentions of her age.
00:06:02.860 84 years old was the last time that they, you know, that she was.
00:06:07.860 Any age of hers was mentioned in Google and.
00:06:11.860 So I start taking to social media and I can't find any traces of her.
00:06:22.860 And that guy, you know, her son, he he was my stepdad from when.
00:06:28.860 From six to 14.
00:06:29.860 And it's just strange.
00:06:31.860 You have a family, a group of people in your life, and then all at once.
00:06:36.860 That door just closes.
00:06:37.860 I haven't talked to him since I was, you know, 14 years old.
00:06:42.860 I'm 36 now or 35 now.
00:06:44.860 And so it's, you know, it's been a long time.
00:06:47.860 And I could kind of see that his social media was there.
00:06:51.860 And at one point I did manage to find like a number that was supposedly supposed to be his on Google.
00:06:56.860 And I shouted a text message.
00:06:58.860 And I said.
00:07:00.860 You know, I'm trying to get in contact with your mother.
00:07:03.860 I explained who I was.
00:07:06.860 Um.
00:07:07.860 And I explained that I was just having difficulty.
00:07:10.860 And there was no response.
00:07:12.860 So for a couple of days.
00:07:15.860 I was in a weird headspace.
00:07:17.860 And I don't know.
00:07:18.860 I don't know why it was like.
00:07:19.860 Weighing on me heavy.
00:07:20.860 It was just like I felt like this thing was put on me to reach out to her.
00:07:23.860 And everywhere I was just hitting these stops.
00:07:26.860 So long story short, I did get in contact with somebody a few days later.
00:07:32.860 Oddly enough, it was the wife. 0.87
00:07:35.860 Of my old stepdad never never exchanged a word with this woman. 1.00
00:07:39.860 Um.
00:07:40.860 He got into a relationship right after him and my mom separated.
00:07:43.860 We went our separate ways.
00:07:44.860 He went his.
00:07:45.860 And I just reached out to this lady and I said, hey, I know this is weird.
00:07:50.860 Um.
00:07:51.860 But Barbara was really meaningful to me and I'm having a hard time tracking her down.
00:07:57.860 Uh.
00:07:58.860 Uh.
00:07:59.860 And she was really kind.
00:08:02.860 Reached back out right away.
00:08:05.860 Said she would pass the message along.
00:08:08.860 And then before that night was over, I guess she decided to break the news to me that.
00:08:14.860 In fact, Barbara had been dead since 2021. 0.92
00:08:18.860 So.
00:08:20.860 And, uh. 0.96
00:08:25.860 It really fucked me up. 0.95
00:08:28.860 I actually cried. 0.96
00:08:30.860 Which is weird because.
00:08:32.860 I don't know when the last time I.
00:08:34.860 I cried was.
00:08:36.860 And, um.
00:08:39.860 And I was confused.
00:08:40.860 Didn't know why I was crying.
00:08:42.860 I haven't seen this woman since I was 14 years old.
00:08:45.860 But.
00:08:48.860 It was a rough night.
00:08:51.860 That night.
00:08:52.860 My wife actually woke me up the next morning.
00:08:55.860 Said I was.
00:08:56.860 Uh.
00:08:57.860 I was talking a lot in my sleep.
00:08:59.860 And.
00:09:00.860 Since then, I've had some more correspondence with.
00:09:03.860 With, uh.
00:09:04.860 That.
00:09:05.860 That woman. 1.00
00:09:06.860 I don't even.
00:09:07.860 You know.
00:09:08.860 Her name is Kim.
00:09:09.860 Uh.
00:09:10.860 Nice lady. 1.00
00:09:11.860 And, uh.
00:09:12.860 And she said that Barbara used to talk about me.
00:09:14.860 And.
00:09:15.860 You know.
00:09:16.860 Said that I should be.
00:09:19.860 I should know that.
00:09:21.860 She never forgot about me.
00:09:23.860 All very weird.
00:09:24.860 Very strange thing to have.
00:09:27.860 And.
00:09:28.860 As an adult man.
00:09:30.860 Who has not looked back.
00:09:32.860 At that part of my life.
00:09:34.860 And I've moved on.
00:09:35.860 You know.
00:09:36.860 So tremendously.
00:09:37.860 Married.
00:09:38.860 Have a kid now.
00:09:39.860 And all this other stuff.
00:09:40.860 And.
00:09:41.860 Just out of nowhere.
00:09:42.860 This is put on me.
00:09:43.860 And then.
00:09:44.860 To think that it was.
00:09:45.860 Something that would hurt.
00:09:47.860 To look at.
00:09:48.860 And it did.
00:09:52.860 But.
00:09:53.860 Top and I have been talking about.
00:09:55.860 Um.
00:09:56.860 This idea of putting my stories into a book.
00:09:59.860 Because.
00:10:00.860 There is.
00:10:01.860 Um.
00:10:02.860 There is.
00:10:03.860 A point.
00:10:05.860 I think.
00:10:06.860 To everything that I experience.
00:10:07.860 And everything that my family experience.
00:10:09.860 And where I am now.
00:10:11.860 And the show that I do now.
00:10:12.860 And the faith that I have in God.
00:10:13.860 And I think the point is.
00:10:18.860 Something that we talk about.
00:10:19.860 Really often.
00:10:20.860 Generational iniquity.
00:10:21.860 And Barbara wasn't my blood. 0.89
00:10:23.860 At all.
00:10:24.860 Um.
00:10:25.860 But she did plant this seed. 0.96
00:10:27.860 Of fascination.
00:10:28.860 With these.
00:10:29.860 Stories.
00:10:30.860 And we'll get into some of her stories.
00:10:32.860 On this episode.
00:10:33.860 And.
00:10:34.860 I think that.
00:10:38.860 Part of the reason.
00:10:39.860 I was supposed to go through this.
00:10:41.860 So that I would be spurred on.
00:10:43.860 To.
00:10:44.860 Uh.
00:10:45.860 To write this book.
00:10:46.860 It feels almost like.
00:10:47.860 Um.
00:10:48.860 A.
00:10:49.860 A.
00:10:50.860 Closing of the circle.
00:10:51.860 My family's experiences have come full circle.
00:10:53.860 Where my grandmother.
00:10:54.860 My biological grandmother.
00:10:55.860 Um.
00:10:56.860 Failed.
00:10:57.860 And I'm not saying that in a negative way.
00:10:58.860 I'm not saying that my grandmother was a bad person.
00:11:00.860 I'm saying that she.
00:11:01.860 She. 0.93
00:11:02.860 Had experiences.
00:11:03.860 She didn't understand.
00:11:04.860 Imagine if today was the day your idea changed someone's life.
00:11:08.860 Imagine if you could help someone pay for college.
00:11:10.860 Help your community build a new playground.
00:11:12.860 Or.
00:11:13.860 Help a child make it to that dream competition.
00:11:15.860 With GoFundMe.
00:11:16.860 It's all possible.
00:11:17.860 GoFundMe is the world's number one fundraising platform trusted by over 190 million people.
00:11:23.860 Every week ordinary people meet their goals and do extraordinary things.
00:11:28.860 Your ideas matter.
00:11:29.860 GoFundMe isn't just for emergencies.
00:11:31.860 Want to raise money for your kid's soccer team.
00:11:33.860 Or raise funds for a small business.
00:11:35.860 A creative project or event.
00:11:37.860 GoFundMe helps you turn ideas into reality.
00:11:40.860 And help adds up.
00:11:41.860 Fundraisers you start for someone else.
00:11:43.860 Raise up to five times more.
00:11:44.860 So think right now.
00:11:45.860 Who could use your help?
00:11:47.860 Change rarely comes from waiting.
00:11:49.860 It comes from someone deciding.
00:11:51.860 Today I'll start.
00:11:52.860 Don't wait for someone else to bring change.
00:11:54.860 Today start your fundraiser in just minutes at GoFundMe.com.
00:11:58.860 That's GoFundMe.com to start your fundraiser.
00:12:00.860 GoFundMe.com.
00:12:01.860 This is a commercial message brought to you by GoFundMe.
00:12:04.860 And she went about dealing with them the wrong way.
00:12:08.860 And now.
00:12:10.860 You know.
00:12:12.860 Two generations after her.
00:12:14.860 I get to close.
00:12:16.860 That.
00:12:18.860 I don't know.
00:12:20.860 No.
00:12:21.860 Close that door. 0.89
00:12:22.860 The loop, right?
00:12:23.860 The loop.
00:12:24.860 Yeah.
00:12:25.860 Because.
00:12:26.860 What my grandmother experience.
00:12:30.860 Bled into her children.
00:12:32.860 And then those experiences bled into their children.
00:12:36.860 And I'm of that generation.
00:12:38.860 And for a time it was.
00:12:40.860 It was bleeding into my son.
00:12:42.860 You know, my son had stories.
00:12:44.860 Really young.
00:12:46.860 And I worked really hard to keep any of this away from him because you know.
00:12:50.860 Kids can't sleep.
00:12:52.860 You plant a seed.
00:12:54.860 You plant a seed.
00:12:55.860 Of a spooky story.
00:12:56.860 In your kid's ear.
00:12:58.860 It's going to grow man.
00:13:00.860 So I was really careful to never do that.
00:13:04.860 And.
00:13:05.860 Much to my dismay.
00:13:07.860 He would still come to me.
00:13:09.860 With these.
00:13:10.860 Stories that I knew the nature of.
00:13:12.860 And I couldn't even.
00:13:14.860 I couldn't even.
00:13:16.860 I couldn't even.
00:13:18.860 Say anything to him about them.
00:13:19.860 I would tell him.
00:13:20.860 You know, pray to Jesus.
00:13:22.860 And that was.
00:13:24.860 The beginning of the solution that like now has come to fruition.
00:13:28.860 Like he doesn't have these experiences anymore.
00:13:30.860 But like I couldn't get into.
00:13:32.860 The nature of them.
00:13:33.860 Or tell him like I've seen those things too. 0.99
00:13:35.860 Or any of that shit because. 0.99
00:13:38.860 You know, I'm just being so careful. 0.99
00:13:42.860 So.
00:13:43.860 This episode you're going to hear a lot of the same stories that you've heard
00:13:45.860 before.
00:13:46.860 But this is like I said, an effort to kind of.
00:13:50.860 Get them all down in one place.
00:13:52.860 So that I can start working them.
00:13:55.860 Into a book.
00:13:56.860 I think.
00:13:58.860 That it would be best probably to start.
00:14:01.860 From like my earliest memories.
00:14:03.860 And I think there's going to be some some jumping back and forth.
00:14:08.860 You know, because obviously.
00:14:10.860 My families take place before I was born and after I was born and
00:14:13.860 and this whole thing is is all over the place.
00:14:15.860 But.
00:14:16.860 Yeah, it seems like this is like a.
00:14:18.860 This lady's like almost a side quest in your family lineage. 1.00
00:14:22.860 Yeah.
00:14:23.860 Yeah.
00:14:24.860 Maybe when you weren't supposed to go on.
00:14:26.860 Well, actually, I think I think I want to start with her stories.
00:14:29.860 Yeah.
00:14:30.860 Because.
00:14:32.860 They're kind of fun.
00:14:33.860 Not not funny.
00:14:34.860 But just saying what I said about my own son and how careful I am.
00:14:38.860 This woman.
00:14:39.860 She didn't care.
00:14:40.860 She was not careful at all, dude.
00:14:42.860 Very funny, actually.
00:14:43.860 So.
00:14:44.860 So Barbara. 1.00
00:14:45.860 Little white house in the suburbs, you know, drove an old Buick, I think.
00:14:52.860 Back when the Buicks were still boxy and.
00:14:57.860 You know, she. 0.91
00:14:59.860 Polish lady.
00:15:03.860 She would cook a kielbasa and and pierogies and, you know, just.
00:15:08.860 Nothing.
00:15:10.860 Nothing about her broke the mold in any staggering way.
00:15:14.860 Can't recall her ever having a drink.
00:15:16.860 House was always clean.
00:15:19.860 Yard was always mode.
00:15:21.860 Her husband would be out in the garage tinkering.
00:15:23.860 He had a boat.
00:15:24.860 He liked to fish.
00:15:25.860 They like to go crabbing.
00:15:26.860 Big.
00:15:27.860 And.
00:15:30.860 You know.
00:15:33.860 Really.
00:15:34.860 Their son.
00:15:36.860 Football team.
00:15:38.860 Did a band thing.
00:15:39.860 80s hair metal when it was big.
00:15:41.860 Kind of like.
00:15:43.860 Americana.
00:15:44.860 In a really big way.
00:15:46.860 And.
00:15:47.860 I'm just trying to paint a picture.
00:15:48.860 That says like.
00:15:49.860 This is not a woman who. 1.00
00:15:53.860 Is.
00:15:55.860 Abnormal in any kind of way.
00:15:56.860 This is not a woman who you would say was a bad. 0.99
00:15:59.860 Mother by any stretch.
00:16:00.860 Great mother.
00:16:01.860 I would say.
00:16:02.860 And played a great grandmother figure to me.
00:16:05.860 And.
00:16:08.860 But still.
00:16:10.860 I don't know.
00:16:11.860 I.
00:16:12.860 I questioned her discernment a little bit on.
00:16:14.860 You know.
00:16:15.860 Some of the decisions he made.
00:16:16.860 So.
00:16:17.860 Six.
00:16:18.860 Seven.
00:16:19.860 Eight years old.
00:16:20.860 I would say.
00:16:21.860 Is the window where these stories start.
00:16:22.860 Coming to me.
00:16:23.860 Barbara would. 1.00
00:16:24.860 Would tell me.
00:16:25.860 I couldn't.
00:16:26.860 I couldn't for the life of me.
00:16:27.860 Remember why.
00:16:28.860 She told me these things.
00:16:31.860 That.
00:16:32.860 She would wake up.
00:16:36.860 Sporadically throughout her life.
00:16:39.860 Find that she was unable to move.
00:16:41.860 And would be in the presence of a man.
00:16:44.860 Who.
00:16:45.860 She couldn't see his face.
00:16:47.860 She couldn't see his face.
00:16:48.860 But he had a.
00:16:49.860 Wide brimmed hat.
00:16:50.860 And like a duster coat.
00:16:52.860 Hmm.
00:16:53.860 And so.
00:16:55.860 This is.
00:16:56.860 What we're all familiar with now is as sort of a sleep paralysis.
00:16:59.860 Hat man encounter.
00:17:01.860 But I'm getting this in 96 97 98.
00:17:05.860 You know.
00:17:06.860 Internet's not a thing yet.
00:17:08.860 And I'm mortified.
00:17:09.860 I'm mortified dude.
00:17:10.860 She's telling me these things.
00:17:11.860 She says.
00:17:13.860 It happens in childhood.
00:17:16.860 And it happens.
00:17:18.860 Into adulthood.
00:17:20.860 She had some theories on it.
00:17:21.860 She's.
00:17:22.860 She thought that it.
00:17:23.860 It was a.
00:17:25.860 It heralded a death.
00:17:27.860 The death of some.
00:17:28.860 In fact.
00:17:29.860 I think to some degree.
00:17:30.860 She thought it was death.
00:17:33.860 And I think she had made some correlations that.
00:17:38.860 You know.
00:17:39.860 This.
00:17:40.860 Thing.
00:17:41.860 Appearing would precede.
00:17:42.860 The death of a loved one.
00:17:45.860 Right.
00:17:46.860 And I guess it's because you know it happened.
00:17:49.860 A time or two.
00:17:51.860 And.
00:17:55.860 She described it in her childhood home in Elizabeth.
00:17:58.860 And she described it in the home that I was living in with her.
00:18:03.860 In Carteret.
00:18:04.860 Which is not very far.
00:18:05.860 But like.
00:18:06.860 You know.
00:18:07.860 This thing.
00:18:08.860 Wasn't restricted to a haunted house.
00:18:10.860 In other words.
00:18:12.860 And.
00:18:13.860 One story in particular that she told me.
00:18:16.860 Which I think actually helped quite a bit.
00:18:20.860 When I was learning about sleep paralysis.
00:18:22.860 And the hat man.
00:18:24.860 Because it gave me context that flew in.
00:18:26.860 In the face of the conventional explanation of it.
00:18:29.860 The conventional explanation is that it's a psychological phenomenon.
00:18:32.860 Your brain.
00:18:35.860 Puts your body into basically sleep mode.
00:18:37.860 So that you're not acting out your dreams.
00:18:40.860 And.
00:18:41.860 Sometimes you wake up.
00:18:43.860 Partially.
00:18:44.860 Everybody's still in that state of paralysis.
00:18:46.860 And that.
00:18:47.860 Evokes fear.
00:18:48.860 And since you're still partially sleeping.
00:18:50.860 You're in a hallucinogenic.
00:18:52.860 State.
00:18:53.860 Where now you're.
00:18:54.860 You're having visual hallucinations.
00:18:55.860 And since you're afraid.
00:18:57.860 The nature of those hallucinations are.
00:18:59.860 Scary.
00:19:00.860 It's actually a really good explanation for it.
00:19:02.860 I buy that.
00:19:04.860 Except for.
00:19:06.860 Barbara's story doesn't fit that.
00:19:08.860 So.
00:19:09.860 The one that I'm talking about.
00:19:10.860 Is when she's younger.
00:19:11.860 Uh.
00:19:12.860 She is.
00:19:13.860 I guess.
00:19:14.860 You know.
00:19:15.860 It's elementary school.
00:19:16.860 She had a sister.
00:19:17.860 Um.
00:19:18.860 Her sister dot.
00:19:20.860 And.
00:19:21.860 They would have run ins with this guy.
00:19:24.860 And they shared a bedroom.
00:19:27.860 And dot.
00:19:29.860 Would confirm to Barbara that she also saw him.
00:19:32.860 One night in particular.
00:19:34.860 After this thing visited.
00:19:36.860 They're sitting at the breakfast table.
00:19:40.860 And.
00:19:42.860 They're talking it over.
00:19:43.860 About how they both saw him.
00:19:44.860 But they're talking in hushed tones.
00:19:47.860 For whatever reason.
00:19:49.860 She said she didn't want her mother to hear her.
00:19:52.860 I don't know if it's because she thought she would get mad or anything like that but.
00:19:57.860 Her mother does overhear.
00:19:59.860 And she.
00:20:00.860 Does get a little snappy.
00:20:01.860 And she goes what are you girls talking about.
00:20:03.860 And.
00:20:05.860 They reluctantly.
00:20:06.860 Explain.
00:20:08.860 And their mother who was in another room.
00:20:11.860 Says I saw him last night too.
00:20:13.860 Whoa.
00:20:15.860 So.
00:20:17.860 For Barbara this was not a psychological phenomenon.
00:20:20.860 This was.
00:20:22.860 A.
00:20:23.860 Entity.
00:20:25.860 Something external.
00:20:27.860 Not a hallucination.
00:20:29.860 Something that had the ability to visit.
00:20:31.860 Her entire household in one night.
00:20:34.860 And.
00:20:36.860 That never.
00:20:38.860 That never left me.
00:20:39.860 And I don't think I've ever actually had myself.
00:20:44.860 A hat man experience.
00:20:46.860 But.
00:20:47.860 I never forgot those stories.
00:20:50.860 And eventually.
00:20:54.860 Eventually Barbara's stories.
00:20:56.860 Would.
00:20:58.860 Overlap.
00:21:00.860 In an unbelievable way.
00:21:02.860 With.
00:21:03.860 My own family stories.
00:21:05.860 So.
00:21:08.860 I'm going to leave those there for now.
00:21:10.860 And we're going to end up revisiting them.
00:21:13.860 And I think I'm going to go to when I was.
00:21:15.860 When I was a.
00:21:16.860 Kid.
00:21:17.860 In the house that I grew up in.
00:21:19.860 Still under the watch of Barbara.
00:21:20.860 No.
00:21:21.860 This is a different house.
00:21:22.860 This.
00:21:23.860 Very confusing.
00:21:24.860 I know.
00:21:25.860 Yeah.
00:21:26.860 Well that was.
00:21:27.860 We need like a.
00:21:28.860 Holly's.
00:21:29.860 HGTV map.
00:21:30.860 I need.
00:21:31.860 Yeah.
00:21:32.860 A timeline.
00:21:33.860 Where is David.
00:21:34.860 Well this.
00:21:35.860 House that I lived in with Barbara.
00:21:36.860 Six to 14.
00:21:37.860 Okay.
00:21:38.860 So I'm talking pre six years old.
00:21:40.860 I think that.
00:21:45.860 There's.
00:21:46.860 There's generational iniquity involved.
00:21:47.860 Also.
00:21:48.860 Trauma.
00:21:49.860 I wasn't a victim.
00:21:50.860 Of anything.
00:21:52.860 Grotesque.
00:21:53.860 I don't think.
00:21:54.860 You know who knows.
00:21:55.860 Everybody says.
00:21:56.860 You repressed the memories.
00:21:57.860 I don't think that happened to me.
00:21:59.860 But I was.
00:22:00.860 You're talking household trauma.
00:22:02.860 Abuse.
00:22:03.860 I wasn't.
00:22:04.860 The yelling.
00:22:06.860 And the fighting.
00:22:07.860 Yeah.
00:22:08.860 I witnessed a lot of violence.
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00:23:10.860 I wasn't really the recipient of a lot of violence, but I did witness a lot of violence, a lot of yelling and abandonment specifically.
00:23:19.860 So when I was real little, we're talking like two, three years old, my mom and my dad separate.
00:23:24.860 And I can remember just, I don't know, countless nights crying into my pillow for my dad to come.
00:23:34.860 Never does.
00:23:35.860 And I don't think that that's insignificant.
00:23:38.860 A lot of people have that, right?
00:23:40.860 Like a lot of people, their households get separated, mom and dad get divorced, whatever.
00:23:45.860 But I think that it is traumatic for a child.
00:23:51.860 And throughout the research on this show, it's like trauma is the doorway that these things slip in.
00:23:57.860 So already it's off to a bad start.
00:24:02.860 Dad leaves.
00:24:04.860 And shortly after that, we leave the house that I grew up in.
00:24:09.860 We move to this house in Elizabeth.
00:24:12.860 Must have been maybe four years old when we lived there.
00:24:15.860 Now in this house, it's one of the first houses that are built on Raleway Avenue in Elizabeth.
00:24:20.860 Raleway Avenue is an old road.
00:24:22.860 Elizabeth is an old town.
00:24:24.860 You know, if you just think about the early settlements of the 13 colonies, right?
00:24:29.860 That whole area, that upper east, northeast coast.
00:24:33.860 That's old.
00:24:35.860 The house that I lived in was old.
00:24:37.860 And we were in there.
00:24:39.860 It was me, my mother, her sister.
00:24:43.860 Some of you guys might remember her sister.
00:24:45.860 That's schizophrenic Aunt Lisa. 0.99
00:24:47.860 Aunt Lisa's two kids.
00:24:49.860 So we're already up to five.
00:24:50.860 My grandmother and my great grandmother.
00:24:57.860 So six, seven people in this one house, few dogs, all women. 0.98
00:25:07.860 I would say like, I was just, I was raised by women.
00:25:09.860 That's why I dress the way that I do.
00:25:12.860 And some of my earliest memories there are bizarre.
00:25:20.860 I do remember conversations that would come from all different directions, whether it was, you know, grandma or the aunts or my mom, that would dismiss all of the thuds and creaks and footsteps and everything else is just, just ghosts.
00:25:36.860 These women did not, like, nobody ever pulled a punch when I was a kid. 1.00
00:25:39.860 It was just, these are just ghosts.
00:25:42.860 And because the house was really old, like I said, so plausible.
00:25:47.860 And I remember one of the strangest occurrences I ever had in that house came from my aunt.
00:25:57.860 So my aunt is, is bipolar schizophrenic.
00:26:00.860 And, and to this day, she is, think about the worst version of schizophrenia, what it does to a person.
00:26:07.860 That's, that's her.
00:26:09.860 I mean, I'm not even trying to be funny.
00:26:11.860 I, maybe I'm too crass and I lack the ability to describe it in, in more graceful words.
00:26:17.860 She looks like a before and after photo of somebody on crack in just the worst way.
00:26:24.860 She doesn't look like herself.
00:26:25.860 I saw a picture of her recently.
00:26:27.860 I went to go visit some family and they showed me a picture of her and it was in ghastly.
00:26:32.860 Ghastly.
00:26:33.860 It's, it's, it's remarkable to me that she's still alive.
00:26:36.860 Drug use or just like spiritual torture?
00:26:38.860 Well, it's, it's the schizophrenia.
00:26:39.860 And of course the system that just fails her constantly.
00:26:44.860 But then of course, you know, that area, right?
00:26:47.860 We're talking Elizabeth.
00:26:48.860 She's all over that area, Elizabeth.
00:26:51.860 She's been as far as, as New York.
00:26:54.860 She got arrested for trying to climb the George Washington bridge. 0.99
00:26:58.860 She's been arrested for standing on the New Jersey transit tracks.
00:27:03.860 And like before the train ever came, people called the police and, but they had to stop
00:27:07.860 the train from running to get her off the tracks.
00:27:11.860 And she was even like in the local news, you know, for that spat. 1.00
00:27:16.860 Um, spooky lady, man, spooky lady.
00:27:21.860 I got more than a few stories about her, but before she's ever diagnosed, before she really
00:27:27.860 goes off the deep end, she's, I think she's babysitting us, me and her two kids.
00:27:34.860 And she asked me to go and get the silverware drawer.
00:27:38.860 I remember that day she was sick and she was laying on the sofa.
00:27:42.860 We had this tan leather sofa in the living room and bizarre request request, but I, I
00:27:48.860 go and I get this silverware drawer and I'm, I'm so young, like four or five.
00:27:53.860 And I'm like wrestling this thing out of the cabinets and I'm carrying it down the hallway.
00:28:01.860 And there's this one hallway that leads from the kitchen to the living room and it's carpeted
00:28:05.860 black and there's no lights in it.
00:28:07.860 It's very dark.
00:28:09.860 And we had a black lab at the time. 1.00
00:28:11.860 She would lay down in that fucking hallway, dude. 1.00
00:28:13.860 Can't see. 1.00
00:28:14.860 And you would step on her and she would stand up and people would go for a ride on her back 0.99
00:28:18.860 like a disaster.
00:28:20.860 Um, and I'm in that hallway and everything starts to feel strange and I, and I hear a
00:28:28.860 woman's voice.
00:28:30.860 And it's even at that age, I discern that it's not, I didn't hear it with my ears.
00:28:39.860 Like I heard it in my head.
00:28:41.860 It's the only time in my life I've ever heard what people would call like mind speak or telepathy.
00:28:48.860 One time.
00:28:49.860 And it was this woman.
00:28:51.860 And she just said, as if she was talking to somebody else, she goes, he's going to drop
00:29:00.860 it.
00:29:01.860 And as soon as that happened, it was like, I got vertigo.
00:29:08.860 Isn't the word.
00:29:09.860 It was like my whole visual cortex twisted.
00:29:13.860 And I could, I didn't have a choice.
00:29:18.860 I let that thing go because I couldn't detect up and down anymore.
00:29:23.860 And it smashes on the ground.
00:29:26.860 And the sound like snaps me out of it.
00:29:30.860 And my aunt, something strange happens next.
00:29:36.860 And I don't remember if it happened to me or if it happened to one of her kids, because
00:29:45.860 my memory is looking at it happening.
00:29:49.860 But, and I remember, I don't, like I said, I don't know who it was happening to these days.
00:30:03.860 I can't even claim.
00:30:04.860 I used to say that it happened to me, but now it's a memory of a memory.
00:30:11.860 Somebody got pinned down and choked on the kitchen floor.
00:30:17.860 And I know that whoever it happened to the other kids watched it happen.
00:30:26.860 And either the one who got choked, I don't know if that was me.
00:30:29.860 I don't know, or the ones who were watching said, I'm going to call the police.
00:30:39.860 And she stopped.
00:30:42.860 And then I don't know what happened after that.
00:30:48.860 And that's kind of like where that one leaves off.
00:30:52.860 In fact, that one was so strange to me that I thought I was going to be schizophrenic.
00:30:57.860 Because I never lost that memory.
00:30:59.860 That never went away.
00:31:01.860 And I knew that my aunt, you know, as I got older, was schizophrenic.
00:31:05.860 And I was, I was worried about it.
00:31:07.860 And I remember looking up the research.
00:31:09.860 It was like, schizophrenia doesn't onset into a, into men typically past a certain age.
00:31:20.860 It was like 28 or 30.
00:31:23.860 So when that happened, like when I finally crossed that, you know, that threshold, I, I did sigh a breath of release or relief rather.
00:31:32.860 You know, I remember checking in one day, like, oh man, I'm past that age.
00:31:35.860 I didn't get schizophrenia.
00:31:37.860 When, when you last spoke with your cousin, he's the one that's in and out of juvie.
00:31:41.860 He would have been the guy that saw this happen to you or to him or to somebody, right?
00:31:46.860 Yeah.
00:31:47.860 Did you ask him about that?
00:31:49.860 I don't know.
00:31:50.860 I almost want to say that I did.
00:31:52.860 Um, because it's such a core memory for me.
00:31:57.860 Let me go back real quick to the time.
00:32:00.860 Think about the stories.
00:32:02.860 Um, I, I feel like I did ask him, hold on.
00:32:08.860 I mean, I, I do, I do want to look at this at the day.
00:32:12.860 I mean, yeah, I reached out to her son recently and we'll get into, to what happened to him.
00:32:18.860 Um, for the first time, basically since I was 12 or 13, he also ended up becoming schizophrenic.
00:32:28.860 And, uh, he got put in juvie and then in juvie, some things went wrong.
00:32:36.860 And then he got put into adult prison as he, as he got older.
00:32:39.860 And now, no, I didn't ask him.
00:32:43.860 I think you should follow up.
00:32:45.860 Um, that's an interesting, uh, wrinkle in the story, right?
00:32:50.860 Because somebody is getting choked.
00:32:53.860 And yeah, if you're watching from outside of your body, which I've had that similar experience.
00:33:00.860 Um, well, what happened in that instance?
00:33:03.860 And then also that would lead you to question, why would she send you to do such a bizarre 0.52
00:33:08.860 task that almost knowing that you'd fail in order to then do that?
00:33:14.860 If it was you, I've told my mom about it and she just goes like, no, that never happened.
00:33:21.860 But when I tell you like that story had me checking in every few years with what the age for schizophrenia
00:33:28.860 was, like, it wasn't something I made up.
00:33:31.860 It was definitely real.
00:33:33.860 I remember that.
00:33:34.860 I remember that.
00:33:36.860 I remember that woman's voice.
00:33:38.860 Is it because you didn't want, you didn't want to become the way she was?
00:33:43.860 Well, you know, my.
00:33:46.860 Yeah, I mean, schizophrenia is terrifying.
00:33:52.860 And I knew what happened to her kids.
00:33:59.860 I also knew there was something in the research that suggested schizophrenia has a tendency to skip a generation.
00:34:07.860 Mm hmm.
00:34:08.860 Um, I actually want to look that up real quick.
00:34:10.860 Schizophrenia skips a generation.
00:34:15.860 And I remember doing like the math.
00:34:17.860 Schizophrenia doesn't technically skip a generation in direct predictable way, but it can appear that way because it's polygenetic or polygenic rather, and not solely inherited.
00:34:27.860 And while it often clusters in families, the risk depends on combination of.
00:34:30.860 Okay, so so there was a time when I guess what appears that way was what I interpreted as, you know, the research.
00:34:39.860 The research says it skips a generation apparently just appears to skip a generation.
00:34:42.860 But I was thinking like, oh, maybe it came from my grandmother and one kid got it, but the other kid got skipped the other kid being my mom.
00:34:57.860 And that maybe that meant like I was afraid of this.
00:35:00.860 Not like, you know, but it was just something that would cross my mind and I would get worried.
00:35:05.860 So there's no way like when she said it didn't happen.
00:35:11.860 Like number one, you you weren't there.
00:35:13.860 We were being babysat.
00:35:14.860 And number two.
00:35:17.860 I remember that woman's voice, and I know what that instance did to me as far as like my my fascination with with schizophrenia.
00:35:27.860 So.
00:35:28.860 Yeah.
00:35:29.860 And then as far as the seeing it from a different POV, I just wonder if I was.
00:35:36.860 I don't think that means that I was dying necessarily.
00:35:40.860 It could just mean like I was disassociating from trauma.
00:35:44.860 Yeah. 0.98
00:35:45.860 And children, I think, have an ability sometimes to slip like if there truly is a thing astral projecting or any of that shit, which I think is a real. 0.97
00:35:54.860 You know, it's a reality. 0.96
00:35:57.860 I think kids can often slip into that accidentally, given the right circumstances.
00:36:02.860 And I think that that's probably what I ended up doing.
00:36:06.860 So.
00:36:07.860 Another weird story that happened in that house.
00:36:11.860 Which kind of connects to what we were just talking about, this disassociation.
00:36:16.860 My grandma.
00:36:20.860 Her name was Betty Lou, and. 1.00
00:36:23.860 This is a weird thing.
00:36:25.860 This is something that I realized recently.
00:36:28.860 And this isn't like shade to my mother.
00:36:31.860 At all.
00:36:32.860 My mom was very distant and she'll tell you she didn't know how to be a mom.
00:36:37.860 My grandmother.
00:36:38.860 Before my mom and my aunt were born, had a son.
00:36:44.860 And.
00:36:45.860 His.
00:36:46.860 His name was David.
00:36:49.860 And they put.
00:36:51.860 They made my grandmother put him up for adoption.
00:36:54.860 That's how the story goes.
00:36:55.860 I heard some weird thing recently where.
00:36:58.860 One of my aunts said, well, I think they almost wanted to see her push back. 0.91
00:37:02.860 And try to keep the baby.
00:37:04.860 It was like a threat.
00:37:06.860 She was really young.
00:37:08.860 And.
00:37:09.860 I think she just kind of said, okay, fine.
00:37:12.860 I don't know.
00:37:13.860 I don't know how it went.
00:37:14.860 Who the hell knows, right?
00:37:15.860 It's a long time ago.
00:37:16.860 Way before me, obviously.
00:37:17.860 But she puts that baby up for adoption. 0.95
00:37:20.860 I know that.
00:37:21.860 That really screwed her up.
00:37:24.860 Because.
00:37:25.860 I got my hands on a briefcase of her. 0.98
00:37:27.860 After she passed and.
00:37:29.860 There were a lot of fascinating things in that briefcase.
00:37:35.860 Um.
00:37:36.860 And we'll probably get into that later, but one of these things is.
00:37:39.860 Rough drafts.
00:37:41.860 Of.
00:37:42.860 Songs.
00:37:43.860 One of them was called logs in a fire.
00:37:45.860 And it was this heart wrenching song that she had written about.
00:37:48.860 How her love for her son.
00:37:51.860 Still burns like logs in a fire.
00:37:54.860 And there were also rough drafts.
00:37:56.860 Of.
00:37:57.860 Letters.
00:37:59.860 To.
00:38:00.860 Oprah.
00:38:01.860 Maybe a couple of other talk show hosts.
00:38:03.860 Who were.
00:38:04.860 Doing.
00:38:05.860 At that time.
00:38:06.860 It was kind of popular.
00:38:07.860 Reuniting families who were put up for adoption and things like that.
00:38:12.860 And she was trying to appeal to them and you know.
00:38:14.860 That never happened.
00:38:15.860 And so.
00:38:19.860 I think history kind of repeated itself.
00:38:22.860 My.
00:38:24.860 Mother.
00:38:25.860 Had me pretty young.
00:38:27.860 Like 18 or 19.
00:38:29.860 And.
00:38:30.860 I always say it's like a funny story with my name.
00:38:34.860 Because my father wanted to name me Bruce Lee.
00:38:35.860 He's a big Bruce Lee guy.
00:38:37.860 And.
00:38:38.860 My mom didn't like the name Bruce.
00:38:40.860 My mom wanted to name me David.
00:38:42.860 And my dad.
00:38:43.860 Like David Lee Roth.
00:38:44.860 Which we actually were talking about that with Vicki Joy Anderson the other day.
00:38:47.860 He just wanted Lee in there.
00:38:48.860 We've got to throw Lee.
00:38:49.860 Got it.
00:38:50.860 Got to throw Lee. 0.99
00:38:51.860 Um.
00:38:52.860 Apparently.
00:38:53.860 I don't know.
00:38:54.860 He used to sing Van Halen songs.
00:38:55.860 My dad.
00:38:56.860 He'll sing.
00:38:57.860 Like he sings like the dude from.
00:38:58.860 ACDC.
00:38:59.860 Does that voice.
00:39:00.860 Yeah.
00:39:01.860 So he's like big into that kind of thing.
00:39:02.860 So I guess it's a.
00:39:03.860 It's a compromise.
00:39:06.860 But the thing that makes me think.
00:39:09.860 That.
00:39:11.860 This was a little bit more meaningful.
00:39:13.860 Than it seems on the surface.
00:39:15.860 Is it was actually two things.
00:39:16.860 One.
00:39:17.860 The distance of my mother.
00:39:18.860 Throughout my entire life.
00:39:19.860 Didn't really hug my mom.
00:39:20.860 Until I was like a man.
00:39:23.860 And.
00:39:25.860 The other thing.
00:39:26.860 Is that she.
00:39:30.860 I'm pretty sure she started this.
00:39:33.860 Made me call her mother mom.
00:39:38.860 I think they were going to do a thing.
00:39:40.860 Where she.
00:39:43.860 Raised me.
00:39:44.860 She. 0.93
00:39:45.860 She was.
00:39:46.860 She would have been my mother. 0.53
00:39:47.860 Hmm.
00:39:48.860 And.
00:39:50.860 That's certainly the way that it felt.
00:39:51.860 When I was a kid.
00:39:52.860 My mom was.
00:39:53.860 Working all day.
00:39:54.860 And then she was in night school.
00:39:55.860 So for a few years there.
00:39:57.860 Right.
00:39:58.860 Because I move into this house.
00:39:59.860 At like three.
00:40:01.860 And I'm there till six.
00:40:03.860 So really only a few years.
00:40:04.860 But at that age.
00:40:05.860 It feels like forever.
00:40:07.860 She's raising me.
00:40:08.860 Um.
00:40:10.860 And I'm calling her mom.
00:40:11.860 So where things get strange is.
00:40:14.860 Now she's. 0.84
00:40:15.860 She's.
00:40:16.860 She does a lot of things. 0.61
00:40:17.860 I remember she had me looking into crystal balls.
00:40:18.860 When I was a kid.
00:40:20.860 Um.
00:40:21.860 Highly spiritual.
00:40:23.860 Woman.
00:40:28.860 She. 0.93
00:40:30.860 Has.
00:40:31.860 Liver failure.
00:40:33.860 That's.
00:40:34.860 That comes from drinking.
00:40:35.860 Right.
00:40:36.860 Liver failure.
00:40:37.860 Yeah.
00:40:38.860 It could come.
00:40:39.860 Come from a couple of things.
00:40:40.860 Well it's.
00:40:41.860 I mean.
00:40:42.860 It's a drinking related thing.
00:40:43.860 Because she was drinking.
00:40:44.860 She drank a lot.
00:40:45.860 Okay.
00:40:46.860 In fact the story gets. 0.90
00:40:47.860 Super retarded. 1.00
00:40:49.860 She dies. 1.00
00:40:51.860 Of.
00:40:52.860 Liver failure.
00:40:53.860 My father.
00:40:55.860 Against everybody's advice.
00:40:57.860 Gives her her last bottle of alcohol.
00:40:59.860 She's talking to my dad.
00:41:01.860 Hey.
00:41:02.860 I know everybody's saying not to.
00:41:03.860 But like.
00:41:04.860 Can you please just go.
00:41:05.860 I'll give you the money.
00:41:06.860 Go to the store.
00:41:07.860 He told me this recently. 0.99
00:41:08.860 It's fucking weird dude. 0.95
00:41:10.860 Told me this recently. 0.99
00:41:13.860 Goes yeah.
00:41:14.860 I said.
00:41:15.860 I said. 1.00
00:41:16.860 Fuck it. 1.00
00:41:17.860 You know. 1.00
00:41:18.860 Yeah sure.
00:41:19.860 I'll do it.
00:41:20.860 It was weird watching him tell me.
00:41:21.860 Because it was like a man admitting.
00:41:26.860 I mean this is going to sound like.
00:41:28.860 Bombastic that he like. 0.98
00:41:29.860 That he killed my mother. 0.99
00:41:30.860 You know what I mean.
00:41:31.860 Like that's how it.
00:41:32.860 If you told me that at that age.
00:41:35.860 It would have been my dad killed.
00:41:37.860 My mother.
00:41:38.860 In this weird family dynamic.
00:41:41.860 But that's the last bottle of it.
00:41:43.860 It sends her over the edge.
00:41:45.860 And where things get strange is.
00:41:46.860 Whatever happens to her.
00:41:50.860 It's obvious enough.
00:41:51.860 That it's time to call paramedics.
00:41:53.860 My mother.
00:41:55.860 Says.
00:41:56.860 She brought me.
00:41:57.860 Downstairs to the opposite end of the house.
00:42:01.860 I remember everything.
00:42:03.860 I was standing in that room.
00:42:05.860 I watched her.
00:42:07.860 Resist.
00:42:09.860 The paramedic.
00:42:10.860 She was two floors up. 0.51
00:42:12.860 In an attic bedroom.
00:42:13.860 It was like a finished attic bedroom.
00:42:14.860 And I was supposedly.
00:42:16.860 And look.
00:42:17.860 I'm open to the idea.
00:42:18.860 That I slipped up.
00:42:19.860 While nobody was looking.
00:42:21.860 But my mom.
00:42:22.860 When I told her.
00:42:23.860 What I saw.
00:42:24.860 She's.
00:42:25.860 She says it's impossible.
00:42:27.860 That I couldn't have seen.
00:42:29.860 And I remember where I was.
00:42:30.860 I was standing next to her.
00:42:33.860 Next to my mother.
00:42:35.860 Watching.
00:42:36.860 The paramedics.
00:42:37.860 Fight my grandmother.
00:42:39.860 She's resisting.
00:42:40.860 She doesn't want to come out of the bed.
00:42:41.860 And I mean.
00:42:42.860 She's throwing a fight man. 1.00
00:42:44.860 But eventually.
00:42:45.860 They get her out.
00:42:47.860 And.
00:42:51.860 I remember visiting her.
00:42:52.860 A couple times in the hospital.
00:42:53.860 And she.
00:42:54.860 You know.
00:42:55.860 She ended up dying.
00:42:56.860 And she died really young.
00:42:57.860 Now.
00:42:58.860 I think.
00:43:02.860 This is a good time.
00:43:05.860 To.
00:43:06.860 To bridge this gap between.
00:43:08.860 My biological grandmother and Barbara.
00:43:12.860 So she dies.
00:43:14.860 Ninety six.
00:43:15.860 The house is thrown into limbo.
00:43:17.860 The living situation is probably crazy.
00:43:19.860 It is.
00:43:22.860 Well.
00:43:25.860 This is.
00:43:26.860 This abandonment thing right.
00:43:29.860 She dies.
00:43:32.860 Yeah.
00:43:33.860 I remember the house is like.
00:43:34.860 A shell of itself for a little bit.
00:43:37.860 And then.
00:43:38.860 The footsteps and the creeks and everything.
00:43:39.860 Start getting attributed to her spirit.
00:43:45.860 Wasn't very long.
00:43:46.860 Probably a year.
00:43:48.860 My mom says.
00:43:49.860 Hey.
00:43:50.860 We're going to go.
00:43:52.860 To.
00:43:53.860 One of my friends houses.
00:43:56.860 And.
00:43:58.860 And I get in the car.
00:43:59.860 I go.
00:44:01.860 We watch like a movie.
00:44:03.860 I remember this night.
00:44:06.860 We watch a movie.
00:44:08.860 And then.
00:44:10.860 It gets late.
00:44:11.860 And it's time for me to like.
00:44:12.860 Go to sleep.
00:44:13.860 But they don't have like.
00:44:14.860 You know.
00:44:15.860 How old is my mom by this time?
00:44:16.860 23. 0.97
00:44:17.860 Or some shit like this. 0.98
00:44:18.860 24. 0.98
00:44:19.860 And this guy.
00:44:20.860 Whose house we're over.
00:44:21.860 He doesn't have like.
00:44:22.860 A whole setup.
00:44:23.860 Or anything yet.
00:44:24.860 So there's a sheet.
00:44:25.860 On the.
00:44:26.860 On the floor.
00:44:27.860 And like.
00:44:28.860 I go on the sheet.
00:44:29.860 And they give me like.
00:44:30.860 A blanket and a pillow.
00:44:31.860 And I'm playing with his old.
00:44:32.860 Star Wars.
00:44:33.860 Action figures.
00:44:34.860 And I wake up in the morning.
00:44:37.860 And I'm ready to go home.
00:44:39.860 We never go home again.
00:44:41.860 That's the house.
00:44:43.860 That's Barbara's house. 1.00
00:44:44.860 Huh.
00:44:45.860 I don't know him.
00:44:47.860 I don't know them.
00:44:48.860 But this is where I live now.
00:44:49.860 And.
00:44:54.860 So.
00:44:55.860 You know.
00:44:56.860 I guess I'll just kind of fast forward to it.
00:44:58.860 Because we got to jump to when I'm like.
00:45:01.860 16.
00:45:02.860 16.
00:45:03.860 So I live in this place now.
00:45:05.860 And you know.
00:45:07.860 I have a whole childhood there.
00:45:09.860 And.
00:45:10.860 Honestly.
00:45:13.860 I was.
00:45:14.860 I was a strange kid.
00:45:16.860 I put my foot down right away.
00:45:18.860 And I was like.
00:45:19.860 This guy's not my dad.
00:45:21.860 Only a few years ago.
00:45:22.860 I was crying.
00:45:23.860 Into a pillow nightly.
00:45:24.860 For my dad.
00:45:25.860 Who wasn't coming.
00:45:26.860 And.
00:45:27.860 And.
00:45:28.860 And I dug my feet in dude.
00:45:30.860 And I gave him.
00:45:33.860 A really hard.
00:45:34.860 Eight years. 0.98
00:45:35.860 Really fucking hard. 0.97
00:45:38.860 Never. 0.99
00:45:39.860 Bent or broke.
00:45:40.860 They brought me to Disney World dog.
00:45:42.860 2001.
00:45:43.860 I'm 11 years old.
00:45:44.860 We took a flight right after 9-11.
00:45:46.860 Disney World was a. 1.00
00:45:47.860 Fucking graveyard. 1.00
00:45:48.860 It was. 1.00
00:45:49.860 It was empty.
00:45:50.860 Miserable.
00:45:51.860 Every picture you see of me from then.
00:45:53.860 Miserable.
00:45:54.860 I.
00:45:55.860 It was so hard to get me to smile.
00:45:57.860 For.
00:45:58.860 I.
00:45:59.860 I.
00:46:00.860 I kind of remember.
00:46:01.860 Dude.
00:46:02.860 Like deciding.
00:46:03.860 That I was content in my misery.
00:46:06.860 And that I would.
00:46:07.860 I would just be that.
00:46:08.860 And I think like sometimes man.
00:46:10.860 You really can't put.
00:46:13.860 Enough emphasis on like how much.
00:46:15.860 Will a kid has.
00:46:17.860 Even if that will is aimed towards like being.
00:46:21.860 Miserable.
00:46:22.860 You know.
00:46:24.860 I did it.
00:46:25.860 And.
00:46:27.860 And he tried and stuff.
00:46:29.860 But you know what.
00:46:30.860 Even.
00:46:31.860 Even in all of our distance.
00:46:32.860 I really had this.
00:46:34.860 Window of time in my life.
00:46:36.860 It was kind of beautiful. 0.98
00:46:38.860 I moved from like a shit area. 1.00
00:46:40.860 And I moved to like another shit town. 1.00
00:46:42.860 But I was at least like in the nicer side of town. 0.99
00:46:44.860 And my days.
00:46:46.860 For a while.
00:46:47.860 I used to say I had like a Goonies kind of childhood.
00:46:49.860 It's like on my bike.
00:46:52.860 Every single day.
00:46:53.860 With my group of friends.
00:46:55.860 Exploring this.
00:46:56.860 Little town.
00:46:58.860 And all of its little.
00:47:00.860 Hidden nooks and crannies.
00:47:01.860 I mean.
00:47:02.860 I had a few more experiences in that town.
00:47:05.860 That were strange.
00:47:07.860 One of them is my.
00:47:08.860 My. 0.93
00:47:09.860 You know my kind of infamous black baby story. 0.92
00:47:11.860 Which I'm going to rehash here.
00:47:13.860 You know so we can kind of get this all in there.
00:47:14.860 But.
00:47:15.860 I had a group of friends.
00:47:17.860 And.
00:47:18.860 And we used to go to.
00:47:19.860 A place that we called the ramps.
00:47:21.860 And the ramps was.
00:47:23.860 On the.
00:47:24.860 Edges of town.
00:47:26.860 You had to go through a trailer park.
00:47:28.860 And on the edges of that trailer park.
00:47:31.860 Next to an abandoned.
00:47:32.860 Trailer park section.
00:47:33.860 They had like a fenced in area.
00:47:35.860 Where they would drag all the. 0.99
00:47:37.860 Dilapidated trailers out.
00:47:38.860 And they would.
00:47:39.860 That was their.
00:47:40.860 Their graveyard.
00:47:41.860 There was a tree line.
00:47:42.860 Right next to it.
00:47:43.860 And in that tree line.
00:47:44.860 It's where the ramps were.
00:47:45.860 Me and my friends would go.
00:47:46.860 Interestingly enough.
00:47:47.860 I would find out later on in my life.
00:47:49.860 That Joe.
00:47:50.860 Barbara's son.
00:47:51.860 My mom's boyfriend.
00:47:53.860 Doug those ramps.
00:47:54.860 When he was a kid.
00:47:55.860 With his friends.
00:47:56.860 So years later.
00:47:57.860 He would.
00:47:58.860 Be surprised to find out.
00:47:59.860 That I was not only hanging out there.
00:48:00.860 But that they were still there.
00:48:02.860 And it was just a bunch of areas.
00:48:04.860 That were dug out.
00:48:05.860 You know.
00:48:06.860 A pit for the bike.
00:48:07.860 And then they use the displaced. 0.81
00:48:08.860 Dirt to make.
00:48:11.860 Ramps for the bikes.
00:48:12.860 And.
00:48:13.860 One day we're in there.
00:48:15.860 Me and my group of friends.
00:48:16.860 And it.
00:48:18.860 Was paralleled.
00:48:19.860 By a creek.
00:48:20.860 And that creek. 0.67
00:48:21.860 Had this tall grass.
00:48:22.860 Growing all around it.
00:48:23.860 So.
00:48:24.860 There was an area.
00:48:25.860 In that tree line.
00:48:27.860 That was filled with tall grass.
00:48:28.860 We used to stomp.
00:48:29.860 Paths.
00:48:30.860 Through it.
00:48:31.860 You know.
00:48:32.860 We would.
00:48:33.860 Use our feet.
00:48:34.860 To lay down the tall grass.
00:48:35.860 And.
00:48:36.860 One day.
00:48:37.860 Me and my buddy.
00:48:38.860 Shane.
00:48:39.860 Are going through there.
00:48:40.860 Now I'm like.
00:48:42.860 12.
00:48:43.860 Shane's maybe like 10.
00:48:46.860 And.
00:48:50.860 We're going through this tall grass.
00:48:53.860 And all of a sudden.
00:48:56.860 Something starts.
00:48:57.860 Rushing us.
00:48:59.860 But it's not on the path.
00:49:00.860 It's in the tall grass still.
00:49:02.860 So we can't see it.
00:49:03.860 And I.
00:49:06.860 I grew up in a house.
00:49:07.860 Where.
00:49:08.860 At any given time.
00:49:09.860 We had like three dogs. 1.00
00:49:10.860 We had all kinds of weird shit man. 1.00
00:49:11.860 Even back in Elizabeth. 1.00
00:49:12.860 We had weird shit. 0.99
00:49:13.860 Tortoises and turtles. 0.99
00:49:14.860 Owls.
00:49:15.860 Ferrets.
00:49:16.860 Dogs.
00:49:17.860 Cats.
00:49:18.860 Parrots.
00:49:19.860 You know.
00:49:20.860 Frogs. 0.80
00:49:21.860 Salamanders.
00:49:22.860 Like.
00:49:23.860 You name it.
00:49:24.860 We had it.
00:49:25.860 Some kids were raised in the church.
00:49:26.860 I was raised on animal.
00:49:28.860 Like.
00:49:29.860 No lie.
00:49:30.860 Like when.
00:49:31.860 When Steve Irwin died.
00:49:32.860 Wept.
00:49:33.860 Actually wept.
00:49:34.860 And I was sad.
00:49:37.860 Um.
00:49:39.860 So.
00:49:41.860 I know what's native to this town.
00:49:44.860 Towards the end of me being there.
00:49:45.860 We started getting white tail.
00:49:46.860 Coming through the neighborhood.
00:49:47.860 That was weird.
00:49:49.860 If.
00:49:50.860 If there was anything that this could have been.
00:49:52.860 A dog.
00:49:53.860 A raccoon. 1.00
00:49:54.860 Real run of the mill shit. 1.00
00:49:56.860 I jumped to dog. 1.00
00:49:57.860 And it was moving so fast.
00:49:59.860 That I grabbed my friend.
00:50:00.860 And we just.
00:50:01.860 We're just kids.
00:50:02.860 There's no instinct.
00:50:03.860 We just freeze.
00:50:04.860 And I look in horror.
00:50:06.860 As this thing comes towards me.
00:50:09.860 This whole.
00:50:10.860 Interaction lasts.
00:50:12.860 Three seconds.
00:50:13.860 You know.
00:50:14.860 One Mississippi.
00:50:15.860 Two Mississippi.
00:50:16.860 Three Mississippi. 0.77
00:50:17.860 It's over.
00:50:18.860 It's in the tall grass.
00:50:20.860 It's heading towards us.
00:50:22.860 We grab each other.
00:50:24.860 It bursts out.
00:50:25.860 On the narrow path.
00:50:26.860 In front of us.
00:50:27.860 That we had stomped.
00:50:29.860 You know.
00:50:31.860 And.
00:50:33.860 It is.
00:50:34.860 Not a dog.
00:50:36.860 And it's not a raccoon.
00:50:37.860 It's definitely not a white tail.
00:50:40.860 In fact.
00:50:42.860 The only thing that I could say that it was.
00:50:44.860 Was a.
00:50:46.860 I.
00:50:47.860 You know.
00:50:48.860 It sounds really funny. 0.99
00:50:49.860 But I said it was a naked black baby. 1.00
00:50:52.860 And. 0.98
00:50:54.860 What I mean by that was.
00:50:55.860 It was like toddler sized.
00:50:56.860 Smaller than us.
00:50:57.860 We're.
00:50:58.860 We're.
00:50:59.860 Twelve and ten.
00:51:00.860 Toddler sized.
00:51:02.860 Black. 0.93
00:51:04.860 Not like brown. 1.00
00:51:05.860 Black. 0.99
00:51:07.860 And stark naked. 1.00
00:51:09.860 No genitalia inside. 0.95
00:51:11.860 I mean.
00:51:12.860 This is only a three second encounter.
00:51:13.860 You know.
00:51:14.860 It's not like.
00:51:15.860 I'm not.
00:51:16.860 And it's fast.
00:51:18.860 And it crosses in front of us.
00:51:19.860 I see it definitively.
00:51:20.860 I see it.
00:51:21.860 Maybe far enough.
00:51:22.860 To reach out my hand.
00:51:23.860 And touch it.
00:51:24.860 Oh.
00:51:25.860 Yes.
00:51:26.860 It's not far.
00:51:27.860 And then it disappears into the other side.
00:51:29.860 Of the tall grass.
00:51:30.860 Because we're.
00:51:31.860 We've created a divider.
00:51:32.860 Right.
00:51:33.860 In this path.
00:51:34.860 It bursts out onto the path.
00:51:35.860 And then continues back into the tall grass.
00:51:37.860 Neverminds us.
00:51:38.860 Doesn't.
00:51:39.860 Doesn't.
00:51:40.860 Orient towards us.
00:51:41.860 Doesn't interact with us.
00:51:42.860 Does nothing.
00:51:43.860 And.
00:51:44.860 We.
00:51:45.860 Scream. 1.00
00:51:46.860 And we run out of there.
00:51:48.860 And we keep running.
00:51:49.860 We run out of the woods.
00:51:50.860 Through the trailer park.
00:51:52.860 Out of the trailer park.
00:51:53.860 Into the park.
00:51:54.860 It was.
00:51:56.860 W.O.R.
00:51:57.860 Joseph Medwick Park.
00:51:59.860 In Carteret.
00:52:00.860 And we ran all the way to that.
00:52:02.860 Right to where the baseball field was.
00:52:04.860 And we collapsed in the grass.
00:52:05.860 And then slowly.
00:52:07.860 Our friends caught up.
00:52:08.860 Because they were there.
00:52:09.860 But they were in the ramp section.
00:52:10.860 We blew right past them.
00:52:17.860 And.
00:52:18.860 For the longest time. 0.99
00:52:19.860 I said that was a naked black baby. 1.00
00:52:21.860 It was only when I. 0.96
00:52:22.860 Was older.
00:52:23.860 That I.
00:52:24.860 I was recounting the story.
00:52:26.860 And I said.
00:52:29.860 I think I was 16.
00:52:30.860 By the time I put two and two together.
00:52:31.860 And when I was.
00:52:32.860 You know.
00:52:33.860 It's not something you think about all the time.
00:52:34.860 Oh man.
00:52:35.860 Is that Joe Medwick Park.
00:52:36.860 Yeah.
00:52:37.860 That's the sign dude.
00:52:38.860 I.
00:52:39.860 I grew.
00:52:40.860 Up.
00:52:41.860 At that park.
00:52:42.860 That's where my.
00:52:43.860 Goonies.
00:52:44.860 Childhood happened.
00:52:46.860 I mean.
00:52:47.860 Yeah.
00:52:48.860 Yeah.
00:52:49.860 They put that trail in there.
00:52:50.860 That's the tall grass.
00:52:51.860 That's the tall grass.
00:52:52.860 Dude.
00:52:53.860 That.
00:52:54.860 That area there.
00:52:55.860 That's a garbage heap in the background.
00:52:57.860 Has a.
00:52:58.860 That's just New Jersey David.
00:53:00.860 That's what that.
00:53:01.860 That's what that smell is.
00:53:02.860 Um.
00:53:03.860 Oh.
00:53:04.860 There's the white tail.
00:53:05.860 And batting a thousand today.
00:53:06.860 Huh.
00:53:07.860 There's all the tall grass dude.
00:53:08.860 Um.
00:53:15.860 It was only when I was 16.
00:53:17.860 That I put two and two together.
00:53:18.860 And I was like.
00:53:19.860 I had seen enough toddlers.
00:53:20.860 By then.
00:53:21.860 And I was like.
00:53:22.860 No dude.
00:53:23.860 They don't move that fast.
00:53:25.860 Um.
00:53:27.860 And I think over time.
00:53:28.860 I came to the conclusion.
00:53:29.860 That what I had seen.
00:53:31.860 I don't know.
00:53:32.860 I say a gray.
00:53:33.860 I don't know.
00:53:34.860 There's any.
00:53:35.860 There's a whole variety of cryptids.
00:53:37.860 Right.
00:53:38.860 I don't know what I saw.
00:53:40.860 It was not human.
00:53:41.860 And it was not animal.
00:53:43.860 But it was bipedal.
00:53:46.860 Full grown.
00:53:47.860 You'd say.
00:53:48.860 Based off of how fast it was moving.
00:53:50.860 Right.
00:53:51.860 There's no way.
00:53:52.860 A kid's ever going to book like that.
00:53:53.860 And.
00:53:54.860 And I did also stop and think like.
00:53:56.860 At 16 years old.
00:53:57.860 I was like. 0.89
00:53:58.860 If you strip me naked right now.
00:53:59.860 And made me run through the tall grass. 0.98
00:54:01.860 I would be getting shoots in the bottom of my feet.
00:54:03.860 You know what I mean.
00:54:04.860 Like you snap tall grass off at the base.
00:54:06.860 And.
00:54:07.860 We wear sneakers dog.
00:54:08.860 Like.
00:54:09.860 We got soft feet.
00:54:10.860 That's going to.
00:54:11.860 That's going to go right into my feet.
00:54:13.860 There's no way.
00:54:15.860 But this thing was boogieing. 0.99
00:54:18.860 Like.
00:54:20.860 Full sprint.
00:54:21.860 As fit.
00:54:22.860 Like.
00:54:23.860 Like the wind.
00:54:24.860 Moving through this tall grass.
00:54:26.860 Um.
00:54:27.860 So.
00:54:28.860 I don't know what I sell.
00:54:29.860 I don't know what I saw.
00:54:30.860 There's no way I'll ever know what I saw.
00:54:31.860 But it stuck with me.
00:54:32.860 And interestingly enough.
00:54:33.860 I'll reach out to Shane occasionally.
00:54:34.860 And.
00:54:35.860 And I'll say.
00:54:36.860 Hey.
00:54:37.860 Do you remember that?
00:54:38.860 I haven't done it in years.
00:54:39.860 But there was a time where I would reach out to him.
00:54:40.860 And he would say.
00:54:41.860 Yeah.
00:54:42.860 Dude.
00:54:43.860 I remember that.
00:54:44.860 I don't remember what I saw though.
00:54:45.860 And I'm trying to get verification.
00:54:46.860 Right.
00:54:47.860 I'm like.
00:54:48.860 Okay.
00:54:49.860 Do you remember anything?
00:54:50.860 Like.
00:54:51.860 Do you remember.
00:54:52.860 If it was like.
00:54:53.860 On two feet.
00:54:54.860 And he's like.
00:54:55.860 I don't know.
00:54:56.860 I don't know what I like.
00:54:57.860 It wasn't that he.
00:54:58.860 He would say.
00:54:59.860 I don't know what I saw.
00:55:00.860 And it was weird.
00:55:01.860 That I just couldn't.
00:55:02.860 I was filled with like.
00:55:04.860 Curiosity.
00:55:05.860 This dude was like.
00:55:06.860 A little frantic.
00:55:07.860 A little dismissive.
00:55:08.860 A little repetitive.
00:55:09.860 I don't know what I saw.
00:55:10.860 I don't know.
00:55:11.860 I just.
00:55:12.860 I remember.
00:55:13.860 I was scared.
00:55:14.860 I don't know what I saw.
00:55:15.860 I don't know.
00:55:16.860 I just.
00:55:17.860 I remember.
00:55:18.860 I was scared.
00:55:19.860 I don't know what I saw.
00:55:20.860 Eventually.
00:55:21.860 That turned into.
00:55:22.860 Years later.
00:55:23.860 I don't want to talk about it.
00:55:24.860 I couldn't tell you why.
00:55:26.860 Why would that be the case?
00:55:28.860 It'll probably turn into.
00:55:29.860 Never happened.
00:55:30.860 Probably.
00:55:31.860 If I tried now.
00:55:32.860 Yeah.
00:55:33.860 He was a.
00:55:34.860 You know.
00:55:35.860 Grown man with a kid himself.
00:55:36.860 And.
00:55:37.860 But I just couldn't.
00:55:38.860 I couldn't figure out why that evolved into.
00:55:40.860 I don't want to talk about it.
00:55:42.860 It wasn't like.
00:55:44.860 Anything that left me with a lingering feeling of dread.
00:55:47.860 It was a fascinating thing that happened to us.
00:55:51.860 But you don't want to.
00:55:52.860 I don't know man.
00:55:54.860 Um.
00:55:55.860 It could be like.
00:55:56.860 That faceless story.
00:55:58.860 With the skinwalker where it's kind of like.
00:56:00.860 I don't know.
00:56:01.860 How's your friend's life besides married?
00:56:03.860 Like do you know anything else about it?
00:56:05.860 I don't.
00:56:06.860 I don't know anything else about him.
00:56:07.860 I know he's still in that small town.
00:56:09.860 I think.
00:56:10.860 Um.
00:56:11.860 So a lot of people just never left that place.
00:56:14.860 There's another weird story too.
00:56:17.860 So.
00:56:18.860 That picture that you showed of the tall grass and the garbage heap.
00:56:21.860 In that tall grass.
00:56:23.860 But before the garbage heap.
00:56:25.860 There is a concrete.
00:56:27.860 Sewer pipe.
00:56:29.860 It's not buried in the ground.
00:56:31.860 If you walk on it.
00:56:34.860 From the perspective of that photo.
00:56:36.860 It looks like you're walking in the distance on the top.
00:56:39.860 The tips of the tall grass.
00:56:40.860 Do you get what I'm saying?
00:56:41.860 It's like the tall grass is tall enough to obfuscate the giant concrete pipe.
00:56:46.860 But the pipe is tall enough that it would look like in this photo here.
00:56:49.860 You were traveling along the brown tips of the tall grass in the distance.
00:56:53.860 So you would see everything down to your feet pretty much.
00:56:56.860 If you were walking on it.
00:56:57.860 Walking on it.
00:56:58.860 And it went.
00:56:59.860 Straight across the horizon.
00:57:00.860 Just like you're seeing right there.
00:57:02.860 In the distance.
00:57:03.860 What you can't see.
00:57:04.860 Is it stretches far.
00:57:06.860 And all of the streets.
00:57:08.860 All funneled down.
00:57:10.860 They all point. 0.99
00:57:11.860 To that garbage heap. 0.87
00:57:13.860 All their sewers. 1.00
00:57:16.860 Funnel to that garbage heap. 0.99
00:57:18.860 Well. 0.88
00:57:19.860 Not quite the garbage heap.
00:57:20.860 To the pipe.
00:57:21.860 That runs along the horizon there.
00:57:23.860 And.
00:57:25.860 That place was like.
00:57:27.860 That was the real edges of town.
00:57:29.860 You know what I mean?
00:57:30.860 Like that was the.
00:57:31.860 The bizarre.
00:57:32.860 Only people you're ever going to find back there.
00:57:33.860 Are the kids. 1.00
00:57:34.860 Just us doing Goonie shit. 0.99
00:57:36.860 Sounds like it actually. 0.99
00:57:38.860 One day.
00:57:39.860 We're on my street.
00:57:41.860 I lived on a street.
00:57:42.860 It was William Street.
00:57:45.860 And it was one of those streets that.
00:57:47.860 Went all the way down.
00:57:48.860 To that tall grass.
00:57:51.860 And.
00:57:52.860 Me and my friend.
00:57:53.860 John are standing there.
00:57:55.860 We're on our bikes actually.
00:57:57.860 I think we're on our bikes.
00:57:58.860 Yeah.
00:58:00.860 Man.
00:58:01.860 I was.
00:58:02.860 11 or 12.
00:58:03.860 Same.
00:58:04.860 Same age.
00:58:05.860 We're sitting on our bikes.
00:58:08.860 And we're.
00:58:09.860 Above a manhole.
00:58:10.860 Like a manhole.
00:58:11.860 Was on this.
00:58:12.860 On the street.
00:58:13.860 Right next to us.
00:58:14.860 And we stopped mid conversation.
00:58:16.860 Something is screaming.
00:58:17.860 And running towards us.
00:58:20.860 But we can't see it.
00:58:21.860 But we can hear it getting closer.
00:58:24.860 We put two and two together. 1.00
00:58:25.860 It's in the fucking sewers. 0.99
00:58:28.860 And it passes. 1.00
00:58:29.860 You can hear the splash of its feet.
00:58:31.860 In the water.
00:58:32.860 In the sewers.
00:58:33.860 And it passes underneath us.
00:58:34.860 Underneath us.
00:58:36.860 And we.
00:58:37.860 Instinctively.
00:58:38.860 Start pedaling.
00:58:39.860 Down the street.
00:58:40.860 Because it's got one.
00:58:41.860 Direction.
00:58:42.860 It's going down the street. 1.00
00:58:43.860 But it's under the fucking ground. 1.00
00:58:45.860 And we. 1.00
00:58:46.860 Get to the next manhole.
00:58:47.860 And sure enough.
00:58:48.860 We can still hear it.
00:58:49.860 It's still moving.
00:58:50.860 I don't remember what happened.
00:58:51.860 I think we probably lost it.
00:58:53.860 Or we probably got scared.
00:58:54.860 Or any number of things.
00:58:55.860 But like.
00:58:56.860 Yeah.
00:58:57.860 It's a weird part of town.
00:58:58.860 And it does.
00:58:59.860 It goes right to that big concrete tunnel.
00:59:02.860 And that tunnel.
00:59:03.860 Like.
00:59:04.860 I don't know. 1.00
00:59:05.860 Dumb shit. 1.00
00:59:06.860 Not bad shit. 1.00
00:59:07.860 Spooky shit. 1.00
00:59:08.860 Just bad shit. 1.00
00:59:09.860 Happened there. 1.00
00:59:10.860 Me and my friends.
00:59:11.860 I didn't do it.
00:59:12.860 I was with some friends.
00:59:14.860 And I had to check in every hour.
00:59:16.860 At this time.
00:59:17.860 So I left to go check in.
00:59:18.860 Say hey mom.
00:59:19.860 I'm down the street playing.
00:59:20.860 I went back.
00:59:21.860 And that's my alibi.
00:59:22.860 Well yeah.
00:59:23.860 That's my.
00:59:24.860 And I'm sticking to. 1.00
00:59:25.860 That whole fucking. 1.00
00:59:26.860 Tall grass area. 1.00
00:59:27.860 Up in flames.
00:59:28.860 Oh.
00:59:29.860 These.
00:59:30.860 Two chicks I was hanging out with. 0.99
00:59:31.860 Playing with a lighter. 0.99
00:59:32.860 We were just dumb kids. 1.00
00:59:33.860 They set the whole shit on fire dude. 1.00
00:59:35.860 Um. 1.00
00:59:36.860 So.
00:59:38.860 That's it.
00:59:39.860 For.
00:59:40.860 That chunk of.
00:59:41.860 Of my life.
00:59:42.860 Um.
00:59:44.860 I hit.
00:59:45.860 Fourteen.
00:59:46.860 And.
00:59:48.860 I don't know.
00:59:49.860 I was outside a lot at that time.
00:59:51.860 So I don't remember.
00:59:54.860 My mom.
00:59:55.860 And this guy falling out.
00:59:58.860 But one day.
00:59:59.860 He's just helping us. 1.00
01:00:01.860 Drive all our shit. 1.00
01:00:03.860 To. 1.00
01:00:04.860 Some new place.
01:00:06.860 And that's it.
01:00:07.860 This woman Barbara.
01:00:09.860 That's it.
01:00:10.860 I.
01:00:11.860 I leave her in the past.
01:00:12.860 Is this the same guy.
01:00:13.860 That you reached out to.
01:00:14.860 That didn't answer you.
01:00:15.860 Yeah.
01:00:16.860 And I actually did get in contact.
01:00:17.860 With him.
01:00:18.860 And I.
01:00:19.860 I'll.
01:00:20.860 I'll share that in a little bit.
01:00:21.860 Um.
01:00:23.860 Man.
01:00:25.860 So.
01:00:27.860 I want to say some names.
01:00:28.860 Just for the transcript sake.
01:00:31.860 Uh.
01:00:32.860 Joe.
01:00:33.860 His name.
01:00:34.860 Yeah.
01:00:35.860 His name was Joe.
01:00:36.860 Joe.
01:00:37.860 It's a hell of a.
01:00:38.860 Polish name.
01:00:39.860 To try to.
01:00:40.860 Um.
01:00:41.860 Turns out man.
01:00:42.860 Like I had a lot of animosity.
01:00:43.860 For this guy.
01:00:44.860 For a long time.
01:00:45.860 But like.
01:00:46.860 He's a good dude.
01:00:48.860 He did what he could.
01:00:50.860 It's not his fault.
01:00:51.860 A relationship doesn't work out.
01:00:53.860 Being a stepdad is. 0.99
01:00:54.860 Fucking difficult. 0.99
01:00:55.860 And I was a difficult kid man. 0.99
01:00:57.860 I was. 0.99
01:00:58.860 I was fucked up. 0.99
01:01:00.860 Um. 0.99
01:01:01.860 But like.
01:01:02.860 There it goes again.
01:01:03.860 Right.
01:01:04.860 It's like.
01:01:05.860 Everybody.
01:01:06.860 Who is my family.
01:01:07.860 They just go away.
01:01:08.860 And my mom.
01:01:09.860 You know.
01:01:10.860 My mom is great.
01:01:11.860 I don't really.
01:01:12.860 But I do know.
01:01:13.860 That she was not a.
01:01:14.860 She was not a maternal figure at all.
01:01:17.860 She was very distant.
01:01:18.860 And she struggles with that.
01:01:21.860 I know she struggles with it.
01:01:23.860 She's mentioned it.
01:01:24.860 I haven't talked to her in months.
01:01:25.860 It's still like.
01:01:26.860 Very distant.
01:01:27.860 But like.
01:01:28.860 Everybody who was my family.
01:01:30.860 They just went away.
01:01:31.860 And um.
01:01:33.860 So by this time.
01:01:34.860 When it happens.
01:01:35.860 It's like a formality.
01:01:38.860 It's like.
01:01:39.860 Another day.
01:01:41.860 I'm just like.
01:01:42.860 All right. 0.98
01:01:43.860 I guess we're fucking living in this place now. 1.00
01:01:44.860 They moved to the shitty side of town. 1.00
01:01:46.860 Quick story with that. 0.98
01:01:48.860 Doesn't really.
01:01:49.860 I don't know what it was.
01:01:51.860 I had a.
01:01:52.860 A long running best friend.
01:01:53.860 John.
01:01:54.860 Same guy.
01:01:55.860 I was on the bike with.
01:01:56.860 Um.
01:01:57.860 I'm talking to him.
01:01:59.860 I go.
01:02:00.860 Yeah man. 0.99
01:02:01.860 I'm in my new shithole apartment. 0.99
01:02:02.860 We're in the. 0.98
01:02:03.860 In the ghetto now.
01:02:04.860 Like we've moved to the really bad side of town.
01:02:05.860 And.
01:02:06.860 As I'm on my front porch.
01:02:08.860 Talking to him.
01:02:09.860 I'm on my landline.
01:02:10.860 A scream.
01:02:12.860 But like.
01:02:13.860 Not like a. 1.00
01:02:14.860 Not like a. 1.00
01:02:15.860 Like a beast.
01:02:18.860 Fills.
01:02:20.860 This.
01:02:21.860 Little.
01:02:24.860 Dirty.
01:02:25.860 Dirty. 0.81
01:02:26.860 Corner of town. 0.94
01:02:29.860 Where I'm at now.
01:02:30.860 Is a place called Chrome.
01:02:31.860 And what's on the other side.
01:02:33.860 Of like.
01:02:34.860 One line of houses from me.
01:02:36.860 Is.
01:02:38.860 Industrial.
01:02:40.860 And then.
01:02:41.860 A river.
01:02:42.860 Might have been the Arthur kill.
01:02:43.860 I'm not sure.
01:02:44.860 What.
01:02:45.860 What.
01:02:46.860 Ran along.
01:02:47.860 Across the back of Chrome.
01:02:48.860 But like.
01:02:50.860 Chrome was right next to a place called Port Redding.
01:02:52.860 Port Redding had a place in weird New Jersey.
01:02:55.860 The magazine.
01:02:56.860 It was a.
01:02:57.860 It was a crane.
01:02:58.860 A giant abandoned crane.
01:02:59.860 Not like your typical crane.
01:03:00.860 It was like a.
01:03:01.860 Four pillared structure.
01:03:03.860 With.
01:03:04.860 Levels going all the way up it and.
01:03:06.860 It was on a.
01:03:07.860 On the water side.
01:03:08.860 So like.
01:03:09.860 What's to the back of this place.
01:03:11.860 Is water.
01:03:12.860 Tall grass again.
01:03:13.860 This thing.
01:03:15.860 Is so loud.
01:03:16.860 John hears it on the landline.
01:03:19.860 And he goes. 0.99
01:03:20.860 What the fuck was that. 0.99
01:03:23.860 And that's a. 0.99
01:03:24.860 That's a section of Chrome.
01:03:25.860 I know that road.
01:03:26.860 This is Chrome New Jersey.
01:03:27.860 This is just like.
01:03:28.860 It's just industrial.
01:03:29.860 What you're going to see in Jersey.
01:03:30.860 Yeah.
01:03:31.860 That's it.
01:03:32.860 That's it.
01:03:33.860 Um.
01:03:34.860 And he hears it.
01:03:35.860 That's how loud it is.
01:03:36.860 And it.
01:03:38.860 Made my.
01:03:40.860 My.
01:03:41.860 My hair stand up.
01:03:42.860 And my blood run cold.
01:03:44.860 It was so. 0.99
01:03:45.860 Fucking loud. 0.98
01:03:46.860 Never got an answer for what that was. 0.99
01:03:49.860 Um.
01:03:50.860 It's just remarkable that he heard it too.
01:03:52.860 I'm standing on my front porch and he hears it.
01:03:55.860 Uh.
01:03:56.860 So.
01:03:57.860 The same thing would happen again.
01:03:59.860 My mom meets a new guy.
01:04:02.860 And.
01:04:04.860 After the second time of meeting him.
01:04:07.860 Just move in with him.
01:04:08.860 My life.
01:04:11.860 In this town.
01:04:12.860 In Carteret.
01:04:13.860 Where.
01:04:14.860 I.
01:04:15.860 Grew up.
01:04:16.860 I finally had some stability. 1.00
01:04:18.860 There's this new fucking dude. 0.99
01:04:22.860 And then we're off. 1.00
01:04:24.860 To a whole new town.
01:04:26.860 And I'm in this new house.
01:04:27.860 With this guy.
01:04:29.860 And.
01:04:30.860 Um.
01:04:31.860 That didn't last long.
01:04:33.860 It might have been a year.
01:04:34.860 A year.
01:04:35.860 And a half tops.
01:04:36.860 My life had.
01:04:37.860 Really spiraled.
01:04:38.860 I was totally.
01:04:40.860 Chaotic.
01:04:41.860 I.
01:04:42.860 I had become this dude.
01:04:43.860 That was so.
01:04:44.860 You know.
01:04:45.860 15.
01:04:46.860 16 years old.
01:04:47.860 I was.
01:04:48.860 Like chaos incarnate.
01:04:50.860 Dude.
01:04:51.860 I was standing on teachers desks. 1.00
01:04:52.860 Kicking their shit off onto the floor. 1.00
01:04:55.860 I was. 1.00
01:04:56.860 I beat up a cop.
01:04:58.860 During this time.
01:04:59.860 I.
01:05:01.860 Went off.
01:05:02.860 The deep end.
01:05:03.860 And.
01:05:04.860 About a year and a half.
01:05:05.860 After meeting this guy.
01:05:06.860 And moving in with him.
01:05:07.860 I get kicked out.
01:05:08.860 And I'm homeless now.
01:05:09.860 So this is where things get interesting.
01:05:11.860 This is like.
01:05:12.860 16.
01:05:13.860 17 years old.
01:05:16.860 I'm dating a girl.
01:05:20.860 Trying to think what happened first.
01:05:22.860 Okay.
01:05:23.860 What happened first is.
01:05:25.860 I go and visit an aunt.
01:05:27.860 And I stay with her for a couple of days.
01:05:30.860 And while I'm there.
01:05:31.860 She tells me a story about my grandmother.
01:05:33.860 My biological grandmother.
01:05:35.860 She says my grandmother.
01:05:38.860 Used to.
01:05:40.860 Have all kinds of.
01:05:42.860 Unexplainable encounters.
01:05:43.860 And this was news to me.
01:05:44.860 I didn't know this at all.
01:05:47.860 And.
01:05:48.860 One of them was that.
01:05:51.860 When she was a little girl.
01:05:53.860 Like a toddler.
01:05:55.860 She would be trying to go to sleep.
01:05:58.860 And.
01:05:59.860 What she said would happen was.
01:06:01.860 Either.
01:06:02.860 A bright white light.
01:06:03.860 Would appear.
01:06:04.860 It would rise up.
01:06:05.860 From outside.
01:06:06.860 Of her window.
01:06:08.860 Or.
01:06:09.860 A white owl.
01:06:10.860 Would be there.
01:06:11.860 And she would scream.
01:06:13.860 And the second.
01:06:14.860 Anybody came.
01:06:15.860 To see what was going on.
01:06:16.860 It would disappear.
01:06:17.860 And.
01:06:22.860 She said.
01:06:24.860 Maybe.
01:06:27.860 That she had seen.
01:06:28.860 Some shadow people too.
01:06:29.860 She would complain about.
01:06:30.860 Like the shadows of people.
01:06:31.860 In the house.
01:06:33.860 She also told me.
01:06:36.860 That my aunt.
01:06:37.860 Who by this time.
01:06:38.860 Was well schizophrenic.
01:06:43.860 You know what.
01:06:44.860 There's another story in there.
01:06:45.860 And so I got to remember.
01:06:46.860 To add this in.
01:06:47.860 Um.
01:06:48.860 She had.
01:06:49.860 Um.
01:06:50.860 Played with a Ouija board.
01:06:52.860 She was always off.
01:06:54.860 But after the Ouija board.
01:06:55.860 Was never.
01:06:56.860 The same again.
01:06:57.860 And the other thing.
01:07:00.860 She told me.
01:07:01.860 Was that my grandmother.
01:07:02.860 The one who had.
01:07:04.860 These visitations in the night.
01:07:05.860 By the white light.
01:07:06.860 And the owl.
01:07:07.860 She. 0.93
01:07:08.860 She. 0.93
01:07:09.860 Read a book once.
01:07:10.860 That was so terrifying to her.
01:07:12.860 Like it.
01:07:13.860 It.
01:07:14.860 It messed her up.
01:07:15.860 Um.
01:07:16.860 And.
01:07:17.860 It messed her up so much.
01:07:18.860 That she made my mother promise.
01:07:20.860 That she would never read this book.
01:07:22.860 But.
01:07:23.860 My aunt at the time.
01:07:24.860 Doesn't remember.
01:07:25.860 What the name of the book is.
01:07:26.860 I go home.
01:07:27.860 What if it's this one.
01:07:28.860 That you're writing right now.
01:07:29.860 Well that's.
01:07:30.860 It was. 1.00
01:07:31.860 Fucking time loop. 1.00
01:07:32.860 Time travel. 1.00
01:07:33.860 Um.
01:07:34.860 I go home.
01:07:35.860 I asked my mom.
01:07:36.860 My mom remembers.
01:07:37.860 She tells me right away.
01:07:38.860 Just no reservations.
01:07:39.860 It's.
01:07:40.860 Communion.
01:07:41.860 By Whitley Stryver.
01:07:42.860 Right.
01:07:43.860 First and last time.
01:07:44.860 I ever read a book.
01:07:45.860 I mean.
01:07:46.860 I made.
01:07:47.860 I think I read.
01:07:48.860 I am legend. 0.99
01:07:49.860 Or some shit after that. 0.98
01:07:50.860 But um. 0.98
01:07:51.860 And I want to couch that.
01:07:52.860 For a second.
01:07:54.860 I want to talk about.
01:07:55.860 My aunt.
01:07:58.860 Because I believe.
01:07:59.860 It was the same.
01:08:01.860 Weekend.
01:08:02.860 Schizophrenic Aunt Lisa.
01:08:05.860 Had been rescued by.
01:08:07.860 My aunt Margaret.
01:08:08.860 Aunt Margaret's the lady.
01:08:09.860 An angel.
01:08:11.860 She's a legitimate angel.
01:08:12.860 God put certain people in my life.
01:08:14.860 Aunt Margaret is one of them.
01:08:16.860 In all my stability.
01:08:17.860 She has been.
01:08:18.860 This unbelievable saving grace.
01:08:21.860 Completely.
01:08:23.860 Selfless woman.
01:08:24.860 Um.
01:08:26.860 I've got like this weird bag of like.
01:08:29.860 Crazy abandonment issues.
01:08:31.860 But then like these.
01:08:32.860 Unbelievable.
01:08:34.860 Um.
01:08:37.860 Mountains in my life.
01:08:38.860 Aunt Margaret's one of them.
01:08:39.860 Barbara was.
01:08:40.860 Was one of them.
01:08:42.860 Aunt Margaret has no kids of her own.
01:08:43.860 She's my great aunt.
01:08:46.860 My grandmother's sister.
01:08:48.860 Uh.
01:08:49.860 Grandma Betty.
01:08:50.860 Who I used to call mom.
01:08:51.860 It's her sister.
01:08:52.860 And uh.
01:08:54.860 You know she's.
01:08:55.860 I guess she's.
01:08:58.860 Tracked down Aunt Lisa. 0.79
01:08:59.860 The schizophrenic one.
01:09:01.860 The system fails Aunt Lisa.
01:09:03.860 She's in and out of.
01:09:04.860 Some sort of a program.
01:09:05.860 And then next thing you know.
01:09:06.860 She's on the streets. 0.99
01:09:07.860 And then she's in jail for a while. 0.99
01:09:08.860 And then.
01:09:09.860 She's in a halfway house program thing.
01:09:12.860 Bunch of horrifying things happen.
01:09:14.860 She's in the hood.
01:09:15.860 In this halfway house. 0.99
01:09:16.860 The bunch of black dudes kick her door in. 1.00
01:09:19.860 And they beat the shit out of her. 1.00
01:09:20.860 They break her ribs. 0.99
01:09:21.860 They take. 1.00
01:09:22.860 What little crap she has. 1.00
01:09:23.860 Laying around her apartment. 1.00
01:09:26.860 Or room or whatever.
01:09:28.860 And um.
01:09:30.860 Aunt Margaret's always there.
01:09:31.860 She's always trying to.
01:09:33.860 Help.
01:09:35.860 And.
01:09:37.860 So she takes in Aunt Lisa.
01:09:38.860 Now.
01:09:39.860 This is the first time I've seen Aunt Lisa.
01:09:40.860 For a really long time.
01:09:41.860 She's on her meds. 1.00
01:09:42.860 She's doing shit around the house. 1.00
01:09:44.860 Aunt Margaret's house. 1.00
01:09:45.860 Aunt Margaret lives in a.
01:09:46.860 In a house up in the woods.
01:09:48.860 In New Jersey.
01:09:49.860 And.
01:09:50.860 Uh.
01:09:51.860 When it's dark there. 0.99
01:09:52.860 It's fucking dark. 0.99
01:09:53.860 You know. 1.00
01:09:54.860 Like no street lights kind of shit. 1.00
01:09:55.860 And. 0.99
01:09:56.860 You know.
01:09:57.860 Aunt Lisa's.
01:09:58.860 She's doing her thing.
01:09:59.860 She's.
01:10:00.860 She's like washing dishes. 1.00
01:10:01.860 Doing laundry.
01:10:02.860 Helping around the house.
01:10:04.860 She's talking to me.
01:10:05.860 You know.
01:10:06.860 Everything's cool.
01:10:08.860 And um.
01:10:10.860 And she starts sharing stories with. 0.99
01:10:12.860 These women just have no fucking chill. 1.00
01:10:14.860 She starts sharing stories with me. 1.00
01:10:17.860 I guess just about what it's like to be schizophrenic.
01:10:21.860 This might have been when I was like 15 or 16.
01:10:23.860 So it's the same time frame.
01:10:24.860 It's kind of hard to parse these things.
01:10:25.860 What happened first.
01:10:26.860 And when this all happened.
01:10:27.860 But this.
01:10:28.860 This period of my life.
01:10:29.860 15, 16.
01:10:31.860 And she tells me a couple of interesting things.
01:10:34.860 That I.
01:10:35.860 Won't ever forget.
01:10:36.860 Is that.
01:10:37.860 When she's telling you these things.
01:10:38.860 Is she.
01:10:39.860 Is it almost like a brag.
01:10:41.860 Or is it.
01:10:42.860 Uh.
01:10:43.860 Like you genuinely asking.
01:10:44.860 Like.
01:10:45.860 What did you get from her.
01:10:46.860 It's hard to say man.
01:10:47.860 I don't remember if I asked.
01:10:49.860 I don't remember.
01:10:51.860 How it came up.
01:10:56.860 I don't know.
01:10:57.860 She's always had a weird thing with me.
01:10:59.860 She might have just told me.
01:11:01.860 Without me asking.
01:11:02.860 She used to leave. 1.00
01:11:03.860 Messages on my house phone.
01:11:04.860 When we had moved in with.
01:11:05.860 With this new.
01:11:06.860 Guy.
01:11:07.860 When I was.
01:11:08.860 You know.
01:11:09.860 Before I got kicked out.
01:11:10.860 And it would just say.
01:11:14.860 David.
01:11:15.860 Where's David.
01:11:18.860 He's dead.
01:11:19.860 Isn't he. 1.00
01:11:20.860 He's fucking dead. 1.00
01:11:21.860 Isn't he. 1.00
01:11:22.860 Where is he. 1.00
01:11:23.860 Where's his fucking body. 1.00
01:11:24.860 Like. 1.00
01:11:25.860 And I would come downstairs.
01:11:26.860 And I go.
01:11:27.860 There's a message. 1.00
01:11:28.860 On the fucking. 1.00
01:11:29.860 And I would. 1.00
01:11:30.860 Press play.
01:11:31.860 And be like. 1.00
01:11:32.860 What the fuck. 1.00
01:11:34.860 So I mean. 1.00
01:11:35.860 You know.
01:11:36.860 Whatever her.
01:11:37.860 Her.
01:11:38.860 Fascination with me was.
01:11:39.860 If she was willing to say. 1.00
01:11:40.860 That shit on my answer machine. 1.00
01:11:41.860 I'm sure there's no. 1.00
01:11:42.860 Stones toss for her to say like. 0.98
01:11:43.860 By the way.
01:11:44.860 You want to hear some. 1.00
01:11:45.860 Fucked up shit. 1.00
01:11:46.860 And. 1.00
01:11:47.860 So one of them was about how.
01:11:49.860 She. 0.93
01:11:53.860 She knew.
01:11:55.860 When the devil was going to visit her.
01:11:57.860 Because she would smell him.
01:11:59.860 Mm hmm.
01:12:00.860 And she.
01:12:01.860 She used it.
01:12:02.860 An example one time of.
01:12:04.860 Aunt Margaret's house.
01:12:05.860 Like being in that house.
01:12:06.860 Where she was.
01:12:07.860 And she was kind of killing it.
01:12:08.860 And she's cooking.
01:12:09.860 But like.
01:12:10.860 The story comes from in that house.
01:12:11.860 And she says.
01:12:12.860 I'm.
01:12:13.860 Washing the dishes.
01:12:14.860 So you're washing the dishes.
01:12:16.860 You're facing out a window.
01:12:17.860 That looks to the backyard.
01:12:18.860 And to your back.
01:12:19.860 Is like.
01:12:20.860 You know.
01:12:21.860 Kitchen island.
01:12:23.860 And a.
01:12:24.860 A short step down.
01:12:26.860 A flight of stairs.
01:12:27.860 And then the front door is there.
01:12:28.860 And she says.
01:12:29.860 She's washing the dishes.
01:12:31.860 And she smells them.
01:12:32.860 She's.
01:12:33.860 And it smells like.
01:12:34.860 Rotting flesh.
01:12:36.860 But.
01:12:37.860 She said.
01:12:38.860 There's like a sweetness to it.
01:12:39.860 Like cinnamon or something like that.
01:12:40.860 Mm hmm.
01:12:41.860 I think is what she said.
01:12:42.860 It's like.
01:12:43.860 Don't they use cinnamon to preserve. 0.98
01:12:45.860 Uh.
01:12:46.860 Flesh in the old days.
01:12:47.860 I don't know.
01:12:48.860 But that.
01:12:49.860 That story about.
01:12:50.860 The way he smelled.
01:12:51.860 Is something I'll never forget.
01:12:52.860 And it.
01:12:53.860 It turns up to be a pattern.
01:12:55.860 Over and over again.
01:12:56.860 Right.
01:12:57.860 Throughout all this.
01:12:58.860 This research that we do.
01:12:59.860 Cryptids smell like. 0.71
01:13:00.860 Sulfur.
01:13:01.860 Rotting flesh.
01:13:03.860 Uh.
01:13:04.860 Grays.
01:13:05.860 Smell like sulfur.
01:13:06.860 Rotting flesh.
01:13:07.860 Apparently so does the devil.
01:13:08.860 The devil.
01:13:09.860 By the way.
01:13:10.860 At that term.
01:13:11.860 Like I don't know who.
01:13:12.860 She thinks the devil is.
01:13:13.860 I.
01:13:14.860 And I certainly wasn't.
01:13:15.860 Inquisite enough to ask.
01:13:17.860 Like Satan.
01:13:18.860 Or like Lucifer.
01:13:19.860 Or like.
01:13:20.860 What do you mean by the devil.
01:13:21.860 You know what I mean. 1.00
01:13:22.860 Like I didn't ask any of that shit. 1.00
01:13:23.860 In fact. 1.00
01:13:24.860 I didn't ask a whole lot of questions.
01:13:25.860 I don't think.
01:13:26.860 I was.
01:13:27.860 Uh.
01:13:28.860 Real quick.
01:13:29.860 Yeah.
01:13:30.860 So cinnamon.
01:13:31.860 Has a long historical use.
01:13:32.860 In the preservation of dead bodies.
01:13:33.860 Particularly in ancient Egypt.
01:13:34.860 And Rome.
01:13:36.860 It's value for.
01:13:37.860 You know.
01:13:38.860 It's aromatic.
01:13:39.860 Scents.
01:13:40.860 And antimicrobial properties.
01:13:41.860 That's interesting.
01:13:42.860 It is interesting.
01:13:43.860 By the way.
01:13:44.860 That.
01:13:45.860 That smell too.
01:13:46.860 In some ways.
01:13:47.860 It was similar to a match.
01:13:50.860 Like a lit match.
01:13:52.860 Because I remember.
01:13:53.860 There's another part to this story.
01:13:54.860 But.
01:13:55.860 She says.
01:13:56.860 When she's watching this issue.
01:13:57.860 She smells that.
01:13:58.860 She turns around.
01:13:59.860 And he's standing there.
01:14:00.860 Standing at the top of the stairs.
01:14:02.860 On the other side of the kitchen island.
01:14:03.860 As if he had walked through the front door.
01:14:05.860 Walked up the stairs.
01:14:06.860 Stood there.
01:14:07.860 And stared at her. 0.99
01:14:08.860 I don't fucking remember. 0.99
01:14:09.860 What she said next dog. 0.99
01:14:11.860 Like.
01:14:12.860 I remember.
01:14:14.860 Where I was.
01:14:15.860 When she's telling me this.
01:14:16.860 We're sitting.
01:14:17.860 On the back deck.
01:14:18.860 Of this house.
01:14:20.860 In the mountains.
01:14:21.860 In the woods.
01:14:22.860 At night. 1.00
01:14:24.860 This bitch didn't even bother. 1.00
01:14:25.860 To put the porch light on. 1.00
01:14:27.860 Like.
01:14:28.860 Back.
01:14:29.860 And just.
01:14:30.860 The cherry from her cigarette.
01:14:31.860 As she's telling me this story.
01:14:35.860 And the other thing she said is.
01:14:39.860 She saw him in the backyard once.
01:14:41.860 So where she's washing dishes. 0.73
01:14:42.860 And you would look out that window.
01:14:43.860 I talked about.
01:14:44.860 You're on the second floor.
01:14:45.860 So you would look down.
01:14:47.860 Into the backyard.
01:14:48.860 And it's just.
01:14:49.860 Green grass.
01:14:51.860 Forest trees.
01:14:52.860 There's a fence around it.
01:14:53.860 But beyond that fence.
01:14:54.860 It's the forest.
01:14:56.860 And.
01:14:58.860 When he shows up.
01:15:00.860 The next thing that happens is.
01:15:02.860 He always wants her to set the place on fire.
01:15:06.860 The house or.
01:15:07.860 Wherever she's at.
01:15:08.860 He's.
01:15:09.860 This is a recurring character.
01:15:10.860 And that's.
01:15:12.860 The thing that.
01:15:15.860 That he wants.
01:15:17.860 And.
01:15:20.860 Her kids.
01:15:22.860 Have a.
01:15:23.860 Have a voice too.
01:15:24.860 I was talking to one of them recently.
01:15:27.860 Now.
01:15:28.860 She's got two kids.
01:15:29.860 One's.
01:15:30.860 A year younger than me.
01:15:31.860 The other one's maybe like.
01:15:32.860 Three years younger than.
01:15:33.860 Me.
01:15:35.860 Dude.
01:15:37.860 Her one son.
01:15:39.860 Before he was even 10 years old.
01:15:40.860 He's got a woman.
01:15:41.860 In his head. 1.00
01:15:42.860 Saying to kill himself. 1.00
01:15:43.860 Telling him to kill himself. 1.00
01:15:46.860 And. 1.00
01:15:48.860 And also.
01:15:49.860 To run away.
01:15:50.860 Wherever he's at.
01:15:51.860 It's just interesting.
01:15:52.860 Because they have a thing.
01:15:53.860 That they're saying.
01:15:54.860 You know.
01:15:55.860 Hers is. 0.98
01:15:56.860 Set the place on fire. 0.96
01:15:57.860 His. 0.94
01:15:58.860 Is. 1.00
01:15:59.860 Kill yourself. 1.00
01:16:00.860 And run away. 1.00
01:16:01.860 And it was so.
01:16:03.860 It was so.
01:16:05.860 Shaking to him.
01:16:06.860 It was so.
01:16:07.860 Real to him.
01:16:08.860 That he would.
01:16:09.860 Grab his little brother.
01:16:11.860 And they would run away.
01:16:13.860 They would arm themselves.
01:16:14.860 With kitchen knives. 1.00
01:16:16.860 And they would fucking run away. 1.00
01:16:17.860 They had been brought home. 1.00
01:16:19.860 To that house.
01:16:20.860 I talked about.
01:16:21.860 In Elizabeth.
01:16:22.860 A couple of times.
01:16:23.860 Cops found him on the streets.
01:16:24.860 Two toddlers with knives.
01:16:27.860 They went to the same.
01:16:28.860 He went to the same school as me.
01:16:30.860 Abraham Lincoln school.
01:16:31.860 School 14.
01:16:32.860 In Elizabeth New Jersey.
01:16:34.860 And I.
01:16:36.860 Occasionally.
01:16:37.860 There was two.
01:16:42.860 Two things.
01:16:43.860 That I knew.
01:16:44.860 I.
01:16:45.860 If I saw them.
01:16:46.860 I would know.
01:16:47.860 It was my cousin.
01:16:48.860 One was.
01:16:50.860 If I went into the bathroom.
01:16:51.860 And someone had taken a dump in the urinal.
01:16:55.860 I knew it was my cousin.
01:16:56.860 I don't know if he had a lady's voice in his head. 0.99
01:16:58.860 Tell him to take a dump in the urinal.
01:16:59.860 Or if that's just something he did. 0.88
01:17:01.860 He's just that dude. 1.00
01:17:02.860 He just did that shit. 1.00
01:17:03.860 Shit. 1.00
01:17:04.860 Um. 1.00
01:17:05.860 I think he was also like a pants around the ankles pisser.
01:17:07.860 Just not.
01:17:08.860 Not a good look.
01:17:09.860 Um.
01:17:10.860 The other one was.
01:17:13.860 Sometimes the kids would say.
01:17:14.860 Oh my God.
01:17:15.860 There's.
01:17:16.860 There's somebody running away.
01:17:17.860 And we'd all run to the window.
01:17:18.860 And it would be my cousin.
01:17:20.860 He would be running away.
01:17:21.860 As the school staff was chasing him.
01:17:23.860 And right on the other side of the chain link fence was.
01:17:27.860 Warren Ako Park.
01:17:28.860 I don't know if I'm pronouncing it right.
01:17:29.860 It's a big park in.
01:17:30.860 In Elizabeth.
01:17:31.860 Elizabeth.
01:17:32.860 That was parallel to our school.
01:17:34.860 So once you cross that threshold of the fence.
01:17:36.860 So once you.
01:17:37.860 You know you climb that chain link fence.
01:17:38.860 It was a wrap.
01:17:39.860 Now you got to chase this kid through this.
01:17:41.860 This big park.
01:17:43.860 Um.
01:17:44.860 And so.
01:17:45.860 Yeah.
01:17:46.860 I.
01:17:47.860 You could see him from the window.
01:17:48.860 Just zigging and zagging.
01:17:50.860 Staff is trying to dive and grab him.
01:17:52.860 Slippery little kid.
01:17:53.860 Um.
01:17:55.860 So.
01:17:56.860 So these kids man.
01:17:57.860 They got.
01:17:59.860 They got the same thing.
01:18:00.860 And.
01:18:03.860 I talked to my cousin recently.
01:18:04.860 The.
01:18:05.860 The one who would. 0.99
01:18:06.860 The serial shitter. 0.97
01:18:07.860 And the. 0.74
01:18:08.860 The one who would run away.
01:18:09.860 Um.
01:18:10.860 And he's got some.
01:18:11.860 Some stories man.
01:18:13.860 I guess.
01:18:14.860 It.
01:18:15.860 It's worth saying now.
01:18:16.860 He.
01:18:17.860 He's an adult.
01:18:18.860 But obviously.
01:18:19.860 You know.
01:18:20.860 Grown man with. 0.81
01:18:21.860 With a kid of his own.
01:18:22.860 God bless him.
01:18:23.860 He just had a baby. 0.99
01:18:24.860 And he's got his shit together. 1.00
01:18:26.860 He went away. 0.99
01:18:27.860 When we were like 12.
01:18:30.860 You know.
01:18:31.860 Obviously.
01:18:32.860 His mother was in no.
01:18:33.860 State to raise him.
01:18:34.860 So he went to his uncle.
01:18:35.860 Because his dad wasn't around.
01:18:36.860 Just like mine wasn't around.
01:18:39.860 And.
01:18:41.860 You know.
01:18:42.860 He ends up in.
01:18:43.860 In a.
01:18:44.860 Some sort of a health care facility.
01:18:45.860 Mental health care facility.
01:18:46.860 I don't know.
01:18:47.860 And then he.
01:18:48.860 He does some.
01:18:49.860 Crime.
01:18:50.860 While he's in there.
01:18:51.860 That he hurt somebody.
01:18:52.860 So they put him in a juvenile.
01:18:53.860 Detention facility.
01:18:54.860 So now.
01:18:56.860 His.
01:18:57.860 His brother is just out.
01:18:58.860 Fending for himself.
01:18:59.860 Or he's alone.
01:19:00.860 With this.
01:19:01.860 New family.
01:19:02.860 Of like distant relatives.
01:19:03.860 Who chose to raise him.
01:19:04.860 My mom talked about.
01:19:05.860 How she was going to adopt him.
01:19:07.860 Because they were up for adoption.
01:19:08.860 Basically.
01:19:09.860 When you know.
01:19:10.860 When his mom got.
01:19:11.860 Really went off the deep end.
01:19:12.860 And.
01:19:13.860 While his.
01:19:14.860 His brother is out.
01:19:15.860 Just trying to get through life.
01:19:17.860 He is.
01:19:18.860 In that facility.
01:19:19.860 Does not see the light.
01:19:20.860 To get day again.
01:19:21.860 Until 25.
01:19:23.860 Right.
01:19:24.860 The health care thing.
01:19:25.860 Turns into juvenile detention.
01:19:27.860 Juvenile detention.
01:19:28.860 Turns into adult.
01:19:29.860 Carceration.
01:19:30.860 Or adult.
01:19:31.860 Carceration.
01:19:32.860 And.
01:19:34.860 And he doesn't get to start his life.
01:19:35.860 Until.
01:19:37.860 You know.
01:19:38.860 Until he's a man.
01:19:40.860 And.
01:19:41.860 He gets a job driving truck.
01:19:43.860 At one point.
01:19:44.860 When he gets out.
01:19:45.860 And he tells me.
01:19:46.860 Man.
01:19:47.860 I connected with him recently.
01:19:48.860 And he starts telling me this story.
01:19:51.860 He's like.
01:19:52.860 Dude.
01:19:53.860 This is a weird story.
01:19:55.860 But.
01:19:57.860 I'm driving truck.
01:19:59.860 Somewhere.
01:20:00.860 Some rural area.
01:20:02.860 And.
01:20:05.860 I stopped.
01:20:06.860 Because.
01:20:07.860 I forget.
01:20:08.860 Why the hell he stops.
01:20:09.860 I might be conflating stories.
01:20:11.860 Might be worth looking at real quick.
01:20:12.860 Just to get.
01:20:13.860 I don't want to conflate his story.
01:20:14.860 With another person's story.
01:20:15.860 I hear so many of these.
01:20:16.860 All the time.
01:20:17.860 Um.
01:20:19.860 Boom.
01:20:20.860 Boom.
01:20:21.860 Boom.
01:20:26.860 Give me one second here.
01:20:29.860 Okay.
01:20:30.860 Driving truck.
01:20:32.860 In a rural area of New Jersey.
01:20:34.860 Dark. 0.73
01:20:35.860 Dark. 0.73
01:20:36.860 There's no lights on the road.
01:20:38.860 And my tail light.
01:20:40.860 Lit up the back.
01:20:42.860 And my eyes.
01:20:44.860 Caught something.
01:20:46.860 And my nerves shot up.
01:20:48.860 And all my hair.
01:20:49.860 Went up.
01:20:52.860 And something.
01:20:53.860 Told me to drive.
01:20:55.860 As fast as you can. 0.90
01:20:57.860 Or you're going to die. 0.96
01:20:58.860 To die.
01:20:59.860 It was so big.
01:21:01.860 And so fast.
01:21:03.860 To this day.
01:21:04.860 I don't know what it was.
01:21:05.860 But my primal.
01:21:07.860 Warning.
01:21:08.860 Systems.
01:21:09.860 Were going off.
01:21:12.860 And.
01:21:14.860 I said.
01:21:16.860 Upright.
01:21:17.860 Walking dog.
01:21:19.860 And he said.
01:21:20.860 Bro.
01:21:21.860 Literally.
01:21:22.860 That's what it looked like. 1.00
01:21:23.860 Oh my fucking God. 0.99
01:21:27.860 This is a guy. 1.00
01:21:29.860 Who was not.
01:21:31.860 Sleuthing through.
01:21:32.860 Episodes of the confessionals.
01:21:33.860 Like me.
01:21:34.860 This is a guy who.
01:21:35.860 Is detached from culture.
01:21:36.860 Till 25 years old.
01:21:37.860 And.
01:21:38.860 And he's just trying to live a normal life.
01:21:39.860 I almost feel bad.
01:21:41.860 Bringing these things to him.
01:21:43.860 But it was like.
01:21:44.860 I had to start asking him.
01:21:45.860 Like.
01:21:46.860 That's why I feel like.
01:21:47.860 I did ask him about the thing.
01:21:48.860 But.
01:21:49.860 When I told him.
01:21:52.860 Upright.
01:21:53.860 Walking dog.
01:21:54.860 He's like.
01:21:55.860 What?
01:21:56.860 What do you.
01:21:57.860 How do you know that?
01:21:58.860 Was he like.
01:21:59.860 Embarrassed to say that.
01:22:00.860 Initially.
01:22:01.860 Cause it's like.
01:22:02.860 It's a crazy thing.
01:22:03.860 To just drop on someone.
01:22:04.860 It took a while to get there.
01:22:05.860 I see throughout the conversation.
01:22:06.860 Like I was just skimming through it.
01:22:07.860 And I.
01:22:08.860 I'm talking about grandma's crystal ball.
01:22:09.860 He says.
01:22:10.860 Yeah.
01:22:11.860 I remember that.
01:22:12.860 You know.
01:22:13.860 So.
01:22:14.860 With some backdrop. 0.99
01:22:15.860 Of some supernatural shit. 0.99
01:22:16.860 I even saw. 0.99
01:22:17.860 Mentions of the smell.
01:22:19.860 The same smell.
01:22:20.860 That I was just talking about.
01:22:21.860 With his mother.
01:22:22.860 I guess I was.
01:22:23.860 Telling him that story.
01:22:24.860 Was he smelling it as well?
01:22:25.860 I don't know.
01:22:26.860 Uh.
01:22:27.860 Actually.
01:22:28.860 Yeah.
01:22:29.860 I think he was.
01:22:30.860 I mean.
01:22:31.860 Second.
01:22:32.860 I'll tell you.
01:22:33.860 Do.
01:22:34.860 Do.
01:22:37.860 What does the smell smell like?
01:22:39.460 Because I've definitely smelled things that are off.
01:22:42.860 Um.
01:22:44.860 Rotting eggs.
01:22:45.860 Sulfur.
01:22:46.860 He says.
01:22:47.860 I used to work with dead bodies.
01:22:48.860 And the sweet sticky smell.
01:22:49.860 When I was in certain areas.
01:22:50.860 I would always say.
01:22:51.860 Smelled.
01:22:52.860 I could smell death in the air.
01:22:54.860 And.
01:22:55.860 And I said.
01:22:56.860 Yeah.
01:22:57.860 Your mother said there was a sweetness to it.
01:22:58.860 Like rotting flesh.
01:22:59.860 and he goes i knew i wasn't tripping when i smelled that so yeah he's smelling this too
01:23:06.220 but you know it's just like i think there's layers to it i think the deeper you are
01:23:11.840 in this generational iniquity thing like i think a dog man is something that you got to have layers
01:23:18.180 of access maybe to see that and you know i think that my grandmother
01:23:26.740 i guess to revisit some of her actually no what no we're not going to go there that's just
01:23:33.700 how it goes with my cousin so that was just to show you like aunt lisa's got this thing
01:23:39.920 and then the kids got it too now what's his name his name is julian okay and he's crushing right now
01:23:46.360 he's working hard you know he's got a baby he just had a baby girl like thank god like he gets to have 0.97
01:23:54.620 a fucking life you know what i mean like 12 to 25 i'm sitting over here bitching because 6 to 14 i 0.99
01:24:00.420 live with people that i didn't know this dude was in the fucking system from like 11 or 12 to like 25 0.99
01:24:05.960 years old and his mother is just rotting away on the street somewhere his brother 0.98
01:24:14.060 you know he he's he's troubled life's not easy for him and he i think and i'll get into this later is
01:24:27.900 doing the same thing grandma did he's leaning into the new age he's leaning into a d-based form of 0.99
01:24:34.700 spirituality that's not christ-centered so he's doing crystals he's you know he's got a fucking 0.99
01:24:43.920 sigil on himself not a sigil it's like an anti-possession symbol it comes from the show 0.99
01:24:49.080 supernatural i was gonna say that it's a fucking wb show dude it literally has no roots anywhere 0.96
01:24:58.000 previous to that show i mean it's a pentagram in a circle like you know obviously yeah sure it's got 0.94
01:25:03.880 some roots but like in its specific form it only appears in that show first that's still like i
01:25:10.460 guess you know a powerful symbol of sorts but like damn dog it comes from that but that's this dude 0.98
01:25:16.480 going through shit trying to grab onto something to deal with what he sees as very real 0.99
01:25:23.140 um so after i get kicked out going back to you know my mom meets the new guy shortly after that i 0.92
01:25:33.640 get kicked out i'm dating a girl and she has great internet 0.88
01:25:39.120 hell yeah
01:25:42.280 um now i almost forgot
01:25:49.020 it's it's it's the same time because i'm dating this girl actually when i'm reading this book
01:25:54.720 my mom tells me it's whitley striber communion i go to barnes and nobles i steal it
01:25:59.960 it's still it's still on the shelf at barnes and nobles like so i read this book i remember i'm
01:26:07.400 with this girl at the time and i am homeless but i have a job i'm a security officer for a company 0.95
01:26:13.580 called sora s-o-r-a and i am guarding a fucking aldi's in the hood i'm five seven these are black 0.99
01:26:24.780 people they don't take me seriously at all dude at all and aldi's and aldi's yeah all these i used 0.99
01:26:32.660 to think all these was going to be like like all these used to be trash it's kind of dope now yeah
01:26:38.020 now it's nice but like when i was guarding all these like it was trash and um specifically the
01:26:45.460 issue that they had was homeless people would wait for the cart so they would pull a scheme they'd go
01:26:49.820 hey hey can i help you load your groceries into the car into your car and then in exchange they
01:26:55.460 get the quarter right so if you do that because you need a quarter to take a cart from aldi's if
01:26:59.200 you do that enough you can go across the street to the liquor store and get a 40 because a 40 is like
01:27:05.380 at the time is like two dollars and change so like really kind of a it was really straightforward
01:27:12.240 no definitely not five seven and a half just five seven five seven if i'm lucky um so so uh
01:27:20.660 i remember on my lunch breaks from that place i mean this girl you know we're teenagers she would 0.99
01:27:29.060 she would drive me there and then we would sit in her car and then i would just get out of the car
01:27:35.500 and go be like hey stop bothering these old people there you go this is a banger shirt 0.88
01:27:40.120 no longer available um but i would i would you know we would sit in her black honda accord
01:27:46.020 in the parking lot of aldi's i'd be on the clock i was allowed to sit in my car and you just get out
01:27:51.900 basically as a deterrent at any given time say hey don't bother these people don't do that don't do
01:27:56.820 that so it's kind of a chill gig and while i was in there i would read this book and this is where
01:28:04.060 the connections came in as i'm reading this book over and over again whitley striver's communion is
01:28:12.260 an amalgamation of abductee testimony that's what it is i don't know how many people are in it but
01:28:19.420 it's a lot so you start to notice patterns sleep paralysis shadow people i think there's even a
01:28:29.500 mention of hat man in that book there it is it's got the cover with the that's the one that i had
01:28:34.860 the one with the the face on it oh yeah not that one the one with the black eyes beneath it um but
01:28:40.900 yeah so yep that's it but dude imagine this this is real life this isn't a movie right and i'm reading
01:28:50.980 i'm not very tall at all um and i'm reading
01:28:57.260 stories that shook my grandmother to her core
01:29:03.300 but the stories that they're describing are barbara's stories they're describing sleep paralysis
01:29:12.060 i had only heard sleep paralysis from barbara they're describing these shadow people standing
01:29:16.860 over you while you can't move in the night i had only heard those stories from barbara
01:29:20.960 and at some point i'm pretty sure it mentions a man with a hat
01:29:24.420 when i knew it was like the mystery of my life caught on fire like there was something there
01:29:33.920 there was something real like i was in a movie i was in a horror movie there was something and like 0.98
01:29:40.740 all of a sudden man and i think it was like it came at a time where my life was so like fucked up 0.97
01:29:50.960 you know what i mean like i i had nobody the only person i had was this girl
01:29:55.160 you know mom no dad no no relatives like nothing everything is gone all my childhood friends like
01:30:01.840 everything is gone i've been removed over and over and over again i'm just lost in space
01:30:06.760 it was the perfect time for me to focus only on that i didn't want to look at like my life
01:30:12.500 and i become hyper obsessive yeah like hey look at this gnostic knowledge right
01:30:18.780 it wasn't even just like this gnostic knowledge too it was like this is happening around me
01:30:24.460 by that time i also had had one sleep paralysis experience i was before i was kicked out so it was
01:30:32.940 pretty relative to that time frame because i was only in that house for about a year and a half where i was
01:30:36.620 kicked out i woke up one morning to somebody holding me face down in my pillow and i could feel the weight
01:30:45.880 of somebody on my back and i remember going through like a few different really explosive thoughts 0.98
01:30:52.740 i thought it was my mom fucking around with me i'm just trying to make sense of it right 0.87
01:30:57.080 it's not like my mom ever had a history of doing that to me or anything like that but like 0.72
01:31:00.020 something is happening i have to make sense of it and then it lasts so long that i'm i'm i'm
01:31:06.320 dramatically suffocating so my brain goes to like there's an intruder and they're trying to kill me
01:31:11.160 and and then finally it's so chaotic i can't even determine that i'm i'm paralyzed i can't tell that i
01:31:18.740 can't do this with my arms right i just can feel a person on my back there's a priority list you're
01:31:23.840 thinking about when you wake up and somebody's suffocating you and the the fact that like you don't
01:31:28.100 have full autonomy over your limbs is actually a secondary observation the number one observation
01:31:33.160 is somebody's on my back and they're trying to kill me i finally finally gain control and i explode
01:31:39.600 my face out of the pillow i turn around nobody's in the room so i had i had had like sleep paralysis
01:31:45.260 um this this one time uh now that's not hey no it's not the same thing as a mistake um and
01:31:54.120 i i think i had like moments where sleep paralysis was starting to come upon me because i remember for
01:32:01.340 a period i wouldn't sleep on my back turns out it happens a lot if you sleep on your back at least
01:32:05.080 if you're susceptible to it um all these a dude uh still reserved likes their delis i don't think i
01:32:11.440 think all these is um getting popped now for like all kinds of horrifying crap in their food
01:32:15.760 horse meat uh is a big one it's fine i'm gonna go there after the show it's like when you find out
01:32:21.220 that they're cooking cats in the chinese restaurants in new york and new jersey and i'm like these are
01:32:24.920 great cats so i had a little bit of of knowledge and i guess what what i'm getting at is that it
01:32:32.320 made it personal now like it's my grandma and it's this woman who raised me and i've had like some kind
01:32:37.360 of experience like this and i start just feverishly after after the book i would stay up dude like i would
01:32:46.780 sneak into this girl's um room so that i didn't have to sleep on the streets and i wouldn't go to 0.67
01:32:54.600 sleep i would sit at her computer till four till the sun came up researching researching researching
01:33:01.420 all of these experiences i was obsessed with the hat man for a while just trying to understand like
01:33:08.820 why what is he what is this and in that time i saw my dad like once or twice while i was dating this
01:33:18.580 chick i was so obsessed with it that i asked him and he said yeah he said he had woken up several times
01:33:26.300 throughout his life to see that guy and that he would be paralyzed and the way that he would get out
01:33:32.500 of it was like with anger he would get so angry that he would burst out of it he said that there was
01:33:37.300 times where he would even step up to him and he'd watch him just just like like grains of sand just
01:33:43.420 disappear just and he said he you know he thought it because i have a brother um he thought it was him
01:33:50.620 he's just trying to make sense of it like who is in my room who's standing in the corner who's sitting
01:33:56.240 in the chair and this thing would just vanish and then he would same phenomenon of my aunt first
01:34:03.320 episode of the show of the top lobster show it was a hat man hat man guy she was doing all kinds of
01:34:10.660 crazy stuff scissors scissors in the lawn seeing which doctors to get him to go away and uh oh yeah
01:34:15.340 it's the same story everybody sees the same guy and they'll say it's you know um
01:34:20.160 strictly a psychological phenomenon but i didn't buy that because of barbara's story
01:34:27.060 mm-hmm and that the duster and the hat is unique to like western culture it's just like out of all
01:34:33.500 the things my aunt saw this entity in puerto rico though and that's not really puerto rican culture
01:34:41.340 this um who's the guy that made the kruger movies right he made them he made he designed freddy
01:34:49.660 kruger based off of his friends like night terror experience that he that he learned about
01:34:54.100 wes craven wes craven thank you nance um yeah uh kruger was and think about it the fedora
01:35:00.280 and the nightmares and shit like yeah so this thing for me by the way like this is the this is the 0.69
01:35:08.440 inception this is what i want this book to to be about in so many ways because 0.94
01:35:12.480 these these events they they oriented my brain
01:35:21.740 permanently towards this and this is actually what was really hard because barbara
01:35:31.060 i wanted her to know
01:35:35.360 i had gotten in touch with barbara in 2020 after the lockdowns 0.99
01:35:43.100 and she got it man she was like this is bullshit don't get the vaccine 0.79
01:35:49.500 um and i'm just telling her like all the things that i've learned by then i hadn't talked to her 0.97
01:35:55.540 for so long i had learned so much and and that was the last conversation that i had with her i talked
01:36:05.440 to her a couple of times in the span of a few months in 2020 and i i did stop by one day i brought my son
01:36:14.540 to her he was just born he was still in his
01:36:17.220 in his uh car seat stroller you know kind of click into one another
01:36:24.140 and i pulled up and i and i brought him into that house
01:36:27.480 and i sat in the living room with her and i showed her my son and
01:36:31.280 but that last conversation i had with her
01:36:38.460 that was it 2020 and then 2015 when my son was born
01:36:44.420 and then before that nothing since 2005
01:36:49.240 and um so i had this conversation with her during 2020 and we're
01:36:57.760 telling her all the things that i learned and i just wanted to
01:37:01.380 tell her that
01:37:05.520 i guess i i had dedicated my life to those things
01:37:15.220 you know i wanted to tell her that like these stories that you told me when i was a kid they
01:37:21.080 they didn't just stick with me
01:37:23.100 like they moved me
01:37:27.080 they became part of a bigger story
01:37:30.540 and for a long time to my own detriment i wouldn't let them go
01:37:36.360 and now it's now it's paying dividends
01:37:40.120 now i get to do this
01:37:42.140 full time
01:37:44.120 and yeah man i i wanted to tell her that
01:37:46.760 that's why i was trying to get in touch with her i think like it wasn't it wasn't just that
01:37:49.380 like i told you there was something that just came over me and i was supposed to
01:37:52.080 like i felt like i was supposed to reach out to her
01:37:54.200 there's like reach out to her about what like i definitely would have told her this
01:37:57.280 i definitely would have told her this
01:37:59.640 and um
01:38:01.600 but yeah man you know you start looking into this whole thing this 1.00
01:38:05.720 hat man shit 0.99
01:38:07.520 and it's like well 1.00
01:38:09.920 it's demonic
01:38:11.520 and you start looking into that and it's like
01:38:14.160 did you know
01:38:15.200 their symbols are everywhere
01:38:17.060 and then it's a youtube video
01:38:20.180 with all the
01:38:21.160 album covers with demonic
01:38:23.760 symbols on them and then it's
01:38:26.560 all the
01:38:27.180 all the album covers with one eye symbolism where the pop star is covering their eye
01:38:32.900 and
01:38:33.120 and then it's all the music videos with all the
01:38:36.020 different esoteric symbols in it and
01:38:39.020 and it just spirals and spirals and spirals i mean a lot of the guys
01:38:42.620 who are listening and girls that are listening to this show right now like they're in that
01:38:46.820 and i was in that
01:38:49.940 i mean like it was all i had
01:38:54.700 i was homeless
01:38:56.460 and i had these stories
01:38:59.140 that
01:39:01.480 they came from
01:39:03.120 important people in my life
01:39:05.380 and um
01:39:10.800 i don't know man
01:39:14.960 it's
01:39:15.920 it's a bizarre thing
01:39:17.980 i look back now
01:39:21.860 and
01:39:24.000 you know i i thank god every day
01:39:27.240 for
01:39:29.740 we've we've kind of coined it like the i don't think we coined it but this idea of like the refining fire
01:39:34.980 i had a very unique
01:39:37.720 refining fire it wasn't like
01:39:40.240 trauma and abuse
01:39:43.200 it was a different kind of trauma
01:39:45.380 um
01:39:46.940 you know the abandonment thing and everything but like
01:39:49.280 it uh
01:39:52.460 it was a slow 0.97
01:39:54.960 ass dragging 0.99
01:39:57.840 trauma
01:39:59.320 you know
01:40:01.920 it just felt like those days were so long
01:40:04.600 especially being homeless
01:40:06.180 and i think it was all to
01:40:09.860 it it cooks you
01:40:11.440 you know until you're ready to come out of the oven
01:40:13.400 and
01:40:13.660 and
01:40:14.660 i said earlier that my
01:40:18.480 my um
01:40:20.820 my cousin
01:40:21.440 he kind of leaned on the new age
01:40:23.400 to
01:40:24.460 deal with his situations
01:40:26.840 i think that's exactly what my grandmother did
01:40:29.880 grandma betty
01:40:31.920 that woman that i called mom
01:40:33.380 and
01:40:35.320 i mean she was doing all the
01:40:41.140 the crystal balls
01:40:42.840 her room was
01:40:45.780 witchy 0.92
01:40:47.740 it had all these
01:40:51.660 little mystical knickknacks everywhere
01:40:56.260 and she would try me
01:41:01.320 too she'd sit me down and tell me to look at the ball and tell me what she saw
01:41:05.020 and i remember explicitly 0.98
01:41:06.680 making shit up 0.95
01:41:08.220 just lying to her 0.99
01:41:09.700 i see this i see that
01:41:12.220 i actually remember a moment in my
01:41:13.700 in my
01:41:14.240 childhood i was
01:41:15.540 maybe four or five
01:41:17.420 and i guess i had heard
01:41:19.780 a word
01:41:21.020 that i tried to use
01:41:23.020 then
01:41:24.760 when she said what do you see in the ball
01:41:26.840 and i remember
01:41:29.180 knowing that i said it wrong
01:41:32.860 and feeling a lot of embarrassment
01:41:34.280 but i lied to my grandmother
01:41:36.200 and i told her that i saw
01:41:38.900 someone getting raked
01:41:40.640 in the
01:41:44.000 crystal ball
01:41:45.060 of course i meant 0.95
01:41:46.960 rape 0.93
01:41:47.380 i guess 0.88
01:41:49.380 um
01:41:50.660 but i remember knowing
01:41:52.720 that i
01:41:53.800 had said it wrong
01:41:54.880 and i remember feeling
01:41:56.120 a lot of shame about it
01:41:57.560 and like guilt
01:41:59.820 what was her reaction to that
01:42:01.540 i think she just kind of never minded it
01:42:04.440 you know just just kind of moved on
01:42:05.740 she was
01:42:06.500 really sweet
01:42:08.120 but i think she was like
01:42:10.200 i think she was
01:42:13.300 trying to be my mom
01:42:15.040 it wasn't just grandma
01:42:17.440 i mean she was mom
01:42:18.380 and i think that
01:42:19.400 there was nothing
01:42:20.820 in that woman's eyes 0.98
01:42:22.520 that i could ever do
01:42:23.420 that was wrong
01:42:24.280 i had a dream
01:42:27.400 when i was
01:42:28.040 uh
01:42:29.040 not to interrupt you
01:42:30.480 yeah
01:42:30.900 i think this lady
01:42:31.920 might have been
01:42:32.700 the person to invite
01:42:33.840 all that in
01:42:34.600 i think that's exactly
01:42:36.140 what she was
01:42:36.620 she's the root 1.00
01:42:37.200 we have to kill your grandma 1.00
01:42:40.900 no she's already dead 1.00
01:42:42.140 we have to kill her again 1.00
01:42:43.500 she's been dead for a long time 1.00
01:42:44.720 um
01:42:45.360 i have
01:42:46.060 i do wonder if it goes
01:42:47.340 beyond her
01:42:48.260 because
01:42:48.640 i was
01:42:50.560 going through her things
01:42:51.660 in that briefcase
01:42:52.600 most likely
01:42:53.320 and she
01:42:54.180 she had these
01:42:55.000 writings on remote viewing
01:42:56.560 and uh
01:42:59.420 really beautiful handwriting
01:43:00.500 really like
01:43:01.200 in-depth
01:43:02.340 handwritten notes
01:43:04.100 on remote viewing
01:43:04.960 i think it was the how-to
01:43:06.700 and i find that really strange
01:43:10.260 because
01:43:10.640 if she passed away in 96
01:43:12.180 that's the deadline right
01:43:15.020 i don't know
01:43:15.500 i don't know if she um
01:43:19.160 when she was writing those papers
01:43:21.840 but it's pre-internet
01:43:23.640 which is fascinating
01:43:25.520 and
01:43:26.980 in conjunction
01:43:28.400 with her being an
01:43:29.560 abductee victim
01:43:31.020 i put in air quotes
01:43:32.580 well that's really fascinating
01:43:35.420 what is this woman 1.00
01:43:37.080 who's an abductee victim
01:43:40.180 without the resources
01:43:42.080 of the internet
01:43:42.720 doing writing paperwork
01:43:44.560 on the process
01:43:45.900 of remote viewing
01:43:46.920 and and
01:43:49.480 i guess what i'm getting at
01:43:50.860 is like
01:43:51.280 her father was
01:43:52.600 in the military
01:43:54.360 which doesn't mean much
01:43:56.780 i think he
01:43:57.480 he
01:43:58.160 might have been like
01:44:00.180 a world war ii veteran
01:44:01.000 um
01:44:03.940 but i just wonder
01:44:06.440 if maybe there was
01:44:07.000 something more there
01:44:07.620 like was he a mason
01:44:08.420 maybe that's not so
01:44:11.820 unheard of
01:44:13.360 her
01:44:15.940 his
01:44:18.000 his wife
01:44:18.680 it's like a bit
01:44:20.900 of a real estate mogul
01:44:21.820 my family
01:44:23.000 own
01:44:23.640 six seven properties
01:44:25.080 in new jersey
01:44:25.620 in elizabeth
01:44:27.500 in manisquan
01:44:29.220 bunch of places 0.99
01:44:31.300 how the fuck 0.98
01:44:32.600 i'm not saying like 0.98
01:44:34.260 where'd they get the money from
01:44:35.600 i'm just saying like
01:44:36.200 they were a cut
01:44:37.080 above the average 1.00
01:44:38.060 schmuck 0.99
01:44:38.740 you know maybe he had 0.94
01:44:42.260 connections maybe he got
01:44:43.100 those connections
01:44:43.580 because he's mason
01:44:44.180 i don't know
01:44:44.600 i have no way of
01:44:45.320 verifying that
01:44:45.860 i've been thinking
01:44:46.400 about reaching out
01:44:47.280 and asking
01:44:47.960 what would be
01:44:49.280 his kids
01:44:50.140 we got a couple
01:44:51.680 aunts in that
01:44:52.420 generation that are
01:44:53.040 still alive
01:44:53.680 but you know
01:44:56.240 my uncle
01:45:02.080 uncle mac
01:45:03.200 the guy who gave
01:45:04.420 me both these rings
01:45:05.340 um
01:45:06.740 it's the guy who
01:45:08.820 taught you welding
01:45:09.380 yeah
01:45:09.980 okay
01:45:10.480 her brother
01:45:11.860 i've told this story
01:45:14.100 before
01:45:14.460 um
01:45:16.460 big into fabrication
01:45:17.960 big into aerospace
01:45:18.960 and uh
01:45:21.520 corbel
01:45:22.820 corbel realty
01:45:23.840 no that's not for me
01:45:24.960 um
01:45:25.880 she was just flipping houses
01:45:27.160 by the way
01:45:27.520 that's apparently how she did it 0.97
01:45:28.640 it just said she would buy a house
01:45:29.880 when it was low
01:45:30.540 and then she would do like 0.99
01:45:31.700 some basic paint job shit 0.99
01:45:32.980 and then she would you know 0.99
01:45:34.140 sell it on the market again
01:45:35.160 and
01:45:35.360 so who knows
01:45:36.340 maybe it's it's innocuous
01:45:37.580 but
01:45:37.880 um
01:45:39.580 uncle mac says
01:45:41.240 that he saw a ufo
01:45:42.820 with
01:45:43.200 grandma betty
01:45:45.060 the woman who i called mom
01:45:46.320 and
01:45:47.820 he said he saw it
01:45:49.120 floating above the house
01:45:50.200 in in elizabeth
01:45:51.000 it was the size of a city block
01:45:52.280 had no rivets
01:45:53.020 had no seams
01:45:53.880 close enough to make that observation
01:45:56.400 and um
01:45:58.320 made no sound
01:46:01.080 and looked like
01:46:02.660 nothing that anybody had
01:46:04.260 that he was aware of
01:46:05.120 and he's speaking
01:46:05.960 you know
01:46:06.640 strictly from the
01:46:07.820 point of view of a guy
01:46:09.160 who works in aerospace
01:46:09.880 um
01:46:12.640 their other brother
01:46:13.800 suicide
01:46:15.060 you know
01:46:16.840 real
01:46:17.060 real troubled guy
01:46:17.960 not a great
01:46:18.740 not a great track record
01:46:21.660 of that wave of kids
01:46:22.960 they all like
01:46:25.920 they were
01:46:26.300 they're all like
01:46:27.080 well to do
01:46:28.100 interestingly enough
01:46:29.200 had money
01:46:31.120 their cars 0.95
01:46:32.440 and all that other shit 0.98
01:46:33.320 um 0.99
01:46:35.740 and then of course
01:46:37.220 my grandma passing away
01:46:38.180 really young
01:46:38.660 but there are two left
01:46:39.680 in that generation
01:46:40.380 i sometimes think about asking
01:46:41.520 like was
01:46:41.860 was great
01:46:42.760 grandpa
01:46:43.520 her dad
01:46:45.260 was he a mason
01:46:46.240 because i just can't
01:46:49.140 like that
01:46:49.500 that's
01:46:50.020 that's too much of a coincidence
01:46:51.300 i mean maybe you have
01:46:54.000 these experiences right
01:46:55.060 and then maybe you read
01:46:56.040 one thing
01:46:56.600 and you read another thing
01:46:57.620 and it does like lead to
01:46:58.880 remote viewing
01:47:00.320 but
01:47:01.760 where we've been going
01:47:03.160 lately in our research
01:47:04.200 with the mk ultra
01:47:05.380 you know projects
01:47:08.660 and
01:47:09.160 this idea
01:47:10.720 that they're using
01:47:11.900 maybe a biomechanical
01:47:13.760 entity
01:47:14.140 as a shield
01:47:15.640 when it's a trafficking
01:47:16.980 operation
01:47:17.620 to get people
01:47:18.240 into these
01:47:18.760 these systems
01:47:20.600 so that you can
01:47:21.280 traumatize them
01:47:21.980 and cause
01:47:22.440 disassociative states 0.94
01:47:23.400 and all this other shit 0.96
01:47:24.120 and then of course 0.98
01:47:25.220 remote viewing
01:47:25.800 is a huge part of this
01:47:27.120 this is how
01:47:27.760 these governments
01:47:29.160 learned
01:47:29.980 a lot of times
01:47:31.100 that
01:47:31.380 that this was even
01:47:32.260 possible
01:47:32.780 it's just crazy
01:47:34.880 to think
01:47:35.220 because
01:47:35.600 i don't know
01:47:37.500 how old was
01:47:38.320 uh
01:47:38.720 barbara
01:47:39.420 when this stuff
01:47:40.300 was happening
01:47:40.760 to her
01:47:41.220 well barbara
01:47:42.060 that's different
01:47:42.960 grandma right
01:47:43.520 this is
01:47:44.060 this is where
01:47:44.420 it gets all confusing
01:47:45.140 there's
01:47:45.480 mom
01:47:46.300 betty lou
01:47:48.240 grandma betty
01:47:49.620 she's the one
01:47:50.880 with the alien
01:47:51.380 abduction experience
01:47:51.980 is barbara
01:47:52.560 not even biologically
01:47:53.980 related to me
01:47:54.820 but she's having 0.98
01:47:55.620 sleep paralysis
01:47:56.340 and hat
01:47:56.860 yeah
01:47:57.340 this has to be
01:47:59.040 maybe pre-50s
01:48:01.140 if she died
01:48:01.940 at 80
01:48:02.760 something
01:48:03.480 i'm
01:48:04.640 maybe
01:48:04.860 the timeline's
01:48:05.640 wrong
01:48:05.800 so that's the thing
01:48:06.700 is
01:48:06.940 we're trying to
01:48:07.760 track it back
01:48:08.420 to at least
01:48:08.980 1947
01:48:09.780 well i'm tracking
01:48:11.100 it back
01:48:11.580 for betty lou
01:48:12.740 and betty lou 0.99
01:48:14.860 is much younger
01:48:15.460 than barbara
01:48:16.020 betty lou
01:48:16.700 passes away
01:48:17.620 she might be 0.85
01:48:19.760 like 46
01:48:20.400 or something
01:48:21.060 maybe maybe
01:48:22.040 50 i don't know
01:48:22.860 um
01:48:24.000 that's my mom's
01:48:26.420 mom and so
01:48:27.180 i can probably
01:48:29.060 look up an
01:48:29.440 obituary
01:48:30.000 uh
01:48:31.580 obituary
01:48:34.000 betty
01:48:36.240 let's see
01:48:39.740 uh
01:48:42.520 beloved
01:48:42.940 wife
01:48:44.060 mother
01:48:44.620 grandmother
01:48:45.040 great
01:48:45.300 grandmother
01:48:45.640 sister
01:48:46.420 aunt
01:48:47.260 no i don't
01:48:48.220 think so
01:48:48.700 no no
01:48:49.640 that wouldn't
01:48:50.300 have been her
01:48:50.640 because she
01:48:51.380 wasn't a
01:48:51.700 great grandmother
01:48:52.220 um
01:48:54.160 i'll just
01:48:55.480 type in
01:48:56.040 elizabeth
01:48:57.840 and jay
01:48:59.380 i think the
01:49:01.520 struggle is to
01:49:02.260 determine when
01:49:03.940 the government
01:49:04.400 was operating
01:49:05.200 with these
01:49:06.040 things or
01:49:06.500 who even
01:49:07.740 knows when
01:49:08.280 they were
01:49:08.520 operating
01:49:09.040 because you're
01:49:10.160 not going to
01:49:10.480 get a definitive
01:49:11.040 answer but
01:49:11.740 pre-1947 we're
01:49:13.760 still talking about
01:49:14.480 a spiritual
01:49:15.060 condition that's
01:49:16.260 affecting people
01:49:17.000 now we're
01:49:18.000 talking about
01:49:18.500 this mechanical
01:49:19.420 also spiritual
01:49:21.540 condition it's
01:49:23.600 really hard to
01:49:24.180 draw the line of
01:49:24.900 when it starts
01:49:25.560 when it stops
01:49:26.340 i mean for
01:49:27.840 her i think she
01:49:29.380 would have been
01:49:29.720 born probably
01:49:31.500 in the late
01:49:33.260 50s early
01:49:35.760 60s maybe
01:49:36.620 um
01:49:39.580 yeah i don't
01:49:41.800 know i don't
01:49:43.360 know i mean
01:49:44.080 it's like the
01:49:44.760 inception of the
01:49:45.340 project is one
01:49:46.040 thing but it's
01:49:46.580 ongoing in all
01:49:48.260 of its different
01:49:48.720 forms who
01:49:49.300 knows maybe
01:49:49.640 she's part of
01:49:50.080 the generation 0.55
01:49:50.620 that's much
01:49:51.140 more of a
01:49:51.720 free range
01:49:53.820 she's interesting
01:49:56.560 though because
01:49:57.040 she is
01:49:58.260 outgoing
01:49:59.980 center of
01:50:00.960 attention
01:50:01.460 charismatic
01:50:03.760 everybody loves
01:50:05.640 her she works 1.00
01:50:06.180 in a bar
01:50:06.760 and she's
01:50:08.600 everybody's
01:50:08.980 favorite person
01:50:09.500 and my mom
01:50:10.120 is like a 0.67
01:50:12.060 shell
01:50:12.400 she is
01:50:14.980 she has
01:50:15.660 experiences
01:50:16.280 she's obsessed 0.54
01:50:18.660 with ghost
01:50:20.300 stuff paranormal
01:50:20.960 stuff says she
01:50:22.540 doesn't believe
01:50:23.020 it almost
01:50:24.180 exclusively watches
01:50:25.180 it um
01:50:27.080 and you know
01:50:29.600 she has these
01:50:30.140 stories she'll
01:50:30.680 tell me she
01:50:31.300 her husband's in
01:50:34.700 one room
01:50:35.300 brushing his
01:50:36.140 teeth in the
01:50:36.480 bathroom
01:50:36.840 she's in
01:50:38.040 the bedroom
01:50:39.420 they're on
01:50:40.420 the same
01:50:40.760 floor
01:50:41.220 they both
01:50:42.340 hear
01:50:42.760 the running
01:50:46.520 of small
01:50:46.960 feet
01:50:47.320 and they
01:50:48.400 both hear
01:50:49.140 a door
01:50:50.100 handle twist
01:50:50.820 and they
01:50:51.500 both hear
01:50:51.860 the door
01:50:52.180 open
01:50:52.680 to like one
01:50:54.220 of the other
01:50:54.520 rooms that's
01:50:54.960 on that
01:50:55.200 floor
01:50:55.420 and they
01:50:56.120 both burst
01:50:56.720 out
01:50:57.060 of their
01:50:58.220 respective
01:50:58.680 rooms
01:50:59.620 he's got
01:51:00.580 his toothbrush
01:51:00.980 in his
01:51:01.320 hand
01:51:01.520 and they're
01:51:02.060 both looking
01:51:02.500 for somebody
01:51:03.020 they both
01:51:04.440 heard it
01:51:04.720 independently
01:51:05.220 nobody's
01:51:05.880 there
01:51:06.080 just boom
01:51:07.720 boom
01:51:07.840 boom
01:51:07.960 boom
01:51:08.080 boom
01:51:08.220 boom
01:51:08.320 boom
01:51:08.500 nobody's
01:51:11.260 there
01:51:11.500 um
01:51:12.740 but hers
01:51:17.780 aren't
01:51:18.120 aren't to
01:51:18.520 the degree
01:51:18.840 that you
01:51:19.520 know certainly
01:51:20.000 aunt lisa
01:51:20.540 who's the
01:51:21.340 schizophrenic
01:51:21.920 are and
01:51:23.460 they're not
01:51:23.780 to the degree
01:51:24.240 that her
01:51:26.500 mothers were 0.98
01:51:27.480 i don't think
01:51:28.960 they're to the
01:51:29.340 degree that
01:51:29.720 mine were
01:51:30.160 um
01:51:31.780 so
01:51:35.120 i'm gonna get
01:51:37.680 into my
01:51:38.080 stories
01:51:38.540 and
01:51:40.440 it's gonna be
01:51:41.500 a little bit
01:51:41.940 brutal because
01:51:42.460 a lot of
01:51:42.820 people have
01:51:43.160 heard this 1.00
01:51:43.480 fucking story 1.00
01:51:44.020 again but 1.00
01:51:44.480 you guys
01:51:44.800 gotta remember
01:51:45.240 this is for
01:51:45.660 the sake
01:51:46.040 of um
01:51:46.560 uh
01:51:48.400 you know
01:51:49.180 getting it
01:51:49.480 on on the
01:51:50.220 record
01:51:50.560 get it on
01:51:51.060 wax
01:51:51.420 so
01:51:53.220 during that
01:51:56.260 time that
01:51:57.040 i'm feverishly
01:51:57.800 looking up like
01:51:58.400 hat man stuff
01:52:00.160 i start to
01:52:01.640 have this notion
01:52:02.120 creeping in my
01:52:02.580 head that
01:52:02.900 maybe
01:52:03.300 because i'm
01:52:04.660 looking into
01:52:05.140 this and
01:52:06.140 i'm still
01:52:06.460 wrestling with
01:52:07.360 like well
01:52:07.700 what is
01:52:08.600 this a
01:52:08.900 psychological
01:52:09.640 phenomenon
01:52:10.220 you know i
01:52:11.700 was never
01:52:12.120 one to
01:52:12.320 completely shut
01:52:12.840 the door on
01:52:13.260 that despite
01:52:13.660 barbara's
01:52:14.120 stories about
01:52:14.820 her sister and
01:52:15.940 her mom seeing
01:52:16.440 it the same
01:52:16.820 night but
01:52:17.980 it's like when
01:52:18.280 you're going
01:52:18.540 through the
01:52:18.820 research
01:52:19.180 overwhelmingly
01:52:19.700 you're getting
01:52:20.220 this this is
01:52:20.660 back in like
01:52:21.040 2006 2007
01:52:22.080 you're getting
01:52:22.600 a lot of
01:52:22.980 this psychological
01:52:24.060 phenomenon
01:52:24.680 bodies in a
01:52:25.660 paralysis state
01:52:26.380 you're
01:52:27.240 hallucinating and
01:52:28.420 you're scared
01:52:28.800 because you're
01:52:29.220 paralyzed and
01:52:29.700 you're
01:52:29.820 hallucinating so
01:52:32.160 i start to say
01:52:32.660 to myself well
01:52:33.200 look whether or
01:52:35.620 not it's real is
01:52:37.560 almost an aside
01:52:38.380 thinking about
01:52:41.040 this when i was
01:52:42.700 a kid i used to
01:52:43.180 think about
01:52:43.600 super mario before
01:52:44.580 i went to sleep
01:52:45.280 and i remember
01:52:45.580 one time i had a
01:52:46.340 banger of a
01:52:46.820 super mario dream
01:52:47.500 you know so by
01:52:50.660 virtue of that
01:52:51.460 line of thinking
01:52:52.280 it's likely if you
01:52:53.480 keep looking into
01:52:54.120 this you're going
01:52:54.620 to have an
01:52:54.940 experience could be
01:52:55.700 a nightmare could
01:52:56.420 be whatever but
01:52:57.060 like something's
01:52:57.480 going to happen
01:52:57.820 so i knew
01:53:00.440 that that's a
01:53:01.540 little looking
01:53:02.640 into the abyss
01:53:03.300 and the abyss
01:53:03.680 looks back
01:53:04.220 and um
01:53:06.160 lo and behold
01:53:08.740 something actually
01:53:09.640 does happen
01:53:10.200 and after
01:53:13.000 researching one
01:53:14.000 night i go to
01:53:14.640 sleep next to my
01:53:15.520 girlfriend i you
01:53:16.560 know i've snuck
01:53:17.180 into her house
01:53:18.120 she lives on the
01:53:19.080 second floor
01:53:19.680 if the parents
01:53:21.580 knock on the
01:53:22.160 door i have to
01:53:23.660 jump out of a
01:53:24.300 second story window
01:53:25.160 like off a roof
01:53:26.280 um got real
01:53:28.260 tuck and roll
01:53:30.240 dog and um
01:53:32.100 so i i get off
01:53:34.420 the computer i
01:53:35.120 creep into bed
01:53:35.920 trying to be
01:53:36.400 quiet i go to
01:53:37.020 sleep i wake
01:53:38.440 up and i am
01:53:40.880 uh i'm paralyzed
01:53:42.700 and my faculties
01:53:45.520 mentally are about
01:53:48.840 me like i've got
01:53:49.680 them and i'm
01:53:51.500 thinking well 0.99
01:53:52.660 shit there it 1.00
01:53:53.160 is it's 0.99
01:53:54.400 happened
01:53:54.660 okay let's
01:53:56.820 check this out
01:53:57.260 now i can't
01:53:57.760 move but i can
01:53:58.740 move my eyeballs
01:53:59.460 and i'm observing
01:54:00.320 the room
01:54:00.880 everything's normal
01:54:02.140 i am not at
01:54:04.140 all operating as
01:54:05.100 if i'm in a
01:54:05.540 dream i am awake
01:54:07.180 i am in this
01:54:08.720 room i cannot
01:54:10.180 move my body
01:54:10.980 but if i could
01:54:14.040 have which
01:54:15.780 sometimes it does
01:54:16.400 happen in sleep
01:54:16.980 paralysis people
01:54:17.520 say it's a dream
01:54:18.100 it's like no no
01:54:18.600 no you'll be
01:54:19.500 looking at the
01:54:20.020 room and then
01:54:20.340 when you can
01:54:20.640 finally move
01:54:21.500 nothing changes
01:54:22.740 about the room
01:54:23.440 except for maybe
01:54:24.780 the presence of
01:54:25.440 a demon
01:54:25.720 um if i could
01:54:27.540 have moved
01:54:28.100 everything would
01:54:28.860 have stayed as
01:54:29.440 is it's very much
01:54:31.040 like if i was just
01:54:31.740 paralyzed here i am
01:54:34.080 in this physical
01:54:34.820 realm and as i'm
01:54:37.660 observing i become
01:54:40.480 aware of a shadow
01:54:41.720 that passes across
01:54:43.880 this room and it was
01:54:48.240 a casted shadow not a
01:54:51.200 shadow man the shadow
01:54:52.540 of a man was
01:54:54.100 casted on the wall
01:54:55.780 and was moving
01:54:56.440 which meant that
01:55:00.060 somewhere over here
01:55:02.880 there was a man
01:55:04.560 because i was putting
01:55:06.400 it together if the
01:55:08.640 shadow is over there
01:55:09.420 then the light source
01:55:10.540 has to be over here
01:55:11.380 and that light source
01:55:12.280 was likely a window
01:55:13.400 that was to my right
01:55:14.340 that i i couldn't see
01:55:16.000 because i think she
01:55:16.620 was between me and
01:55:17.700 that window
01:55:18.160 and all of a sudden
01:55:22.200 as i'm trying to like
01:55:23.540 make sense of this
01:55:24.360 i get into a like a
01:55:28.380 painful state of
01:55:29.180 paralysis that is
01:55:30.660 induced by uh an
01:55:34.080 electrical sensation
01:55:35.000 just so it just i just
01:55:37.180 explained it in a fancy
01:55:38.120 way i'm getting
01:55:39.360 electrocuted 1.00
01:55:39.940 and black i'm getting 0.99
01:55:41.780 blacked up my body is 0.99
01:55:42.920 locked out
01:55:43.720 everything is super
01:55:46.020 stiff and i could feel
01:55:47.160 this electricity just
01:55:48.040 coursing through my
01:55:48.680 whole body
01:55:49.180 it's got this noise too
01:55:53.160 and at the same time
01:55:56.860 unbelievable layer of
01:56:00.480 fear
01:56:00.720 doom has fallen upon me
01:56:04.660 i am no longer rational
01:56:06.880 i am
01:56:07.840 in
01:56:08.760 gone
01:56:09.880 in fear
01:56:10.620 i black out
01:56:12.700 almost as if
01:56:13.940 it was just too much
01:56:15.120 to take
01:56:15.560 boom
01:56:17.400 everything shuts off
01:56:18.420 i i come
01:56:20.480 back to
01:56:21.400 and i'm on the other
01:56:22.860 side of the bed
01:56:23.800 i'm by my girlfriend's
01:56:26.240 feet
01:56:26.480 and i'm looking into
01:56:28.300 a
01:56:28.760 door
01:56:29.860 there's a closet now
01:56:30.860 on this side of the
01:56:31.480 room so it's like
01:56:32.060 everything still makes
01:56:33.000 sense
01:56:33.320 that's where the closet
01:56:34.300 would be if you turned
01:56:35.160 me around like
01:56:35.620 everything about this
01:56:37.120 room was normal
01:56:38.620 except
01:56:40.360 a huge
01:56:42.900 huge is a
01:56:44.620 i'm trying how do you
01:56:45.900 quantify light it's
01:56:47.200 it's bright and it's
01:56:48.680 all-encompassing
01:56:49.740 white light
01:56:50.440 is pouring
01:56:52.220 out of
01:56:53.320 think about like is it
01:56:54.740 like close encounters
01:56:55.700 of the third kind or
01:56:56.380 something like the door
01:56:57.060 kicks open and there's
01:56:57.860 just white light
01:56:58.540 pouring through that
01:57:00.000 door like it's like
01:57:00.780 that
01:57:01.080 pure bright white
01:57:03.620 light pouring
01:57:04.660 out of this closet
01:57:05.840 there's no light
01:57:07.680 switch in the closet
01:57:08.300 there's nothing in the
01:57:09.080 closet but clothes
01:57:09.980 it's not even a deep
01:57:11.460 closet
01:57:11.900 there's a closet that
01:57:13.660 had a sheet hung up
01:57:15.860 on a rod
01:57:16.500 you know
01:57:17.460 made no sense
01:57:19.740 and then as soon as
01:57:21.440 that happens
01:57:21.960 boom
01:57:23.040 electric time
01:57:24.880 i'm getting blacked up
01:57:26.120 back in it
01:57:26.820 paralyzed again
01:57:28.000 filled with dread
01:57:29.340 and i black out
01:57:30.260 i wake up in the
01:57:31.360 morning and nothing
01:57:32.060 it's like
01:57:34.680 nothing happened
01:57:35.840 so
01:57:37.040 it doesn't stop me
01:57:43.840 i mean i i keep
01:57:44.580 doing my research
01:57:45.440 i don't have another
01:57:46.860 episode like that
01:57:47.840 that i can remember
01:57:49.280 and you know time
01:57:52.420 just marches forward 0.86
01:57:53.220 i'm an unhinged 0.98
01:57:54.460 homeless conspiracy 0.86
01:57:55.580 theorist
01:57:56.140 um determined to get
01:57:58.560 to the bottom of
01:57:59.160 this mystery
01:57:59.860 that surrounds my
01:58:02.220 family and and
01:58:03.160 and myself now
01:58:04.100 now i've got some
01:58:05.100 personal skin in the
01:58:05.940 game
01:58:06.260 dad's seen it
01:58:08.000 barbara saw it
01:58:09.600 grandma saw it
01:58:11.000 you know
01:58:12.220 um
01:58:13.220 aunt lisa's
01:58:14.560 schizophrenia
01:58:14.900 all these things
01:58:15.820 are just mounting
01:58:16.540 and i guess
01:58:17.660 it in some way
01:58:19.100 i'm looking for a
01:58:19.940 very like personal
01:58:20.860 answer
01:58:21.900 yeah like in that
01:58:24.440 way like my
01:58:25.120 my moving towards
01:58:26.260 conspiracies was
01:58:27.820 like a whole
01:58:28.860 mission
01:58:29.460 and it felt like
01:58:30.940 that
01:58:31.220 i'm not even
01:58:32.760 gonna lie like
01:58:33.180 parts of it felt
01:58:33.920 sexy 0.99
01:58:34.500 it felt fucking 0.99
01:58:36.380 like even though 0.99
01:58:37.500 it was terrifying
01:58:38.160 and it wasn't like
01:58:38.920 the whole time was
01:58:39.840 filled with weird
01:58:40.420 events at all
01:58:41.320 um
01:58:42.280 it felt
01:58:43.840 meaningful
01:58:45.600 this is what we
01:58:48.540 talk about with
01:58:49.340 uh
01:58:49.680 with the bible
01:58:50.960 right it's like a
01:58:52.000 lot of
01:58:52.440 most of the bible
01:58:53.960 in these characters
01:58:55.260 lives is just like
01:58:56.300 you know
01:58:56.580 the in and outs
01:58:57.340 of every what was
01:58:57.920 daniel cooking that
01:58:58.680 day you know
01:58:59.300 how many times did
01:59:00.360 he shower and
01:59:00.980 brush his teeth if
01:59:01.740 they did brush
01:59:02.280 their teeth
01:59:02.640 but no their
01:59:03.800 life is defined
01:59:04.600 by these
01:59:06.100 moments
01:59:06.900 yeah
01:59:07.340 and these moments
01:59:08.480 of a disembodied
01:59:09.940 handwriting on a
01:59:10.740 wall well that
01:59:11.660 lasted a couple of
01:59:12.420 days or a dream
01:59:13.800 you know or
01:59:15.040 interpreting a dream
01:59:16.000 these moments are
01:59:17.460 like just
01:59:18.320 passing
01:59:19.660 yeah
01:59:20.240 but they define
01:59:21.580 you
01:59:21.820 this is as i'm
01:59:23.360 as i'm listening to
01:59:24.240 you tell the story
01:59:25.060 i i messaged you
01:59:26.180 and i think we have
01:59:27.560 a good
01:59:28.000 title it should be
01:59:30.180 called dear barbara
01:59:31.380 and then the
01:59:32.820 subtitle is going to
01:59:34.200 be uh i don't know
01:59:35.860 if it's show we'll
01:59:36.460 talk about it but i
01:59:37.800 will put it out there
01:59:38.740 for the people the
01:59:39.320 conspiracy theorists
01:59:40.320 guide to conspiracy
01:59:41.500 theories it's almost
01:59:42.900 like a love letter
01:59:43.680 dude that actually like
01:59:44.760 you said that and i
01:59:45.440 kind of hurt a little
01:59:46.020 not hurt but like
01:59:46.960 yeah that's got some
01:59:48.540 punch to it
01:59:49.160 yeah yeah it's a love
01:59:50.360 letter to barbara
01:59:51.020 these are the things
01:59:51.760 that uh she's asked
01:59:53.720 she puts you on
01:59:54.800 and you've been
01:59:55.880 discovering on your
01:59:57.360 own journey and now
01:59:58.460 i think uh you write
01:59:59.820 it out
02:00:00.200 yeah yeah
02:00:02.380 um
02:00:03.300 it's it's weird too
02:00:06.780 to be in this place
02:00:07.580 now where
02:00:08.260 it's almost like the
02:00:10.520 answer
02:00:10.960 to conspiracy
02:00:12.380 in some ways
02:00:13.540 is like letting it
02:00:14.360 go
02:00:14.580 which i think is
02:00:18.020 almost like it maybe
02:00:18.980 that's my own bias
02:00:19.900 creeping in like i know
02:00:20.840 i look at it through
02:00:21.380 like this lens of
02:00:22.660 leaning not on your
02:00:23.780 own understanding and
02:00:24.540 gnosticism leading to a
02:00:25.700 lot of false conclusions
02:00:26.940 and and misunderstandings
02:00:28.920 and all these other
02:00:29.480 things but also like
02:00:30.840 what am i gonna do
02:00:31.740 am i gonna be this
02:00:33.840 conspiracy theorists
02:00:37.140 internet um sleuth
02:00:40.560 forever or at some
02:00:43.420 point am i going to go
02:00:45.120 there's only so much
02:00:46.920 that god will let me
02:00:47.700 know
02:00:47.980 and i'm in that
02:00:50.080 season of my life now
02:00:51.120 where it's like i'll
02:00:52.580 push up against
02:00:53.220 something if i feel
02:00:54.760 called to it and if
02:00:56.440 it's permeable and i can
02:00:58.120 start to learn and it
02:00:59.340 and then all of a sudden
02:01:00.220 the patterns start to
02:01:01.060 emerge then let's go
02:01:02.300 we're off to the races
02:01:03.080 but if if i'm not called
02:01:06.300 to it
02:01:06.720 if i don't like push up
02:01:08.600 against it and it
02:01:09.740 immediately gives way to
02:01:11.100 something that makes
02:01:12.600 sense to me i don't care
02:01:14.040 anymore because back in
02:01:16.160 the day it was a
02:01:16.680 scattershot it was
02:01:17.360 everything when i first
02:01:19.800 met my wife the the
02:01:23.020 first thing that i
02:01:23.740 showed her was zeitgeist 1.00
02:01:26.020 the fucking movie she's 1.00
02:01:28.960 trying to kiss on me i'm 1.00
02:01:29.900 like no watch this shit 1.00
02:01:30.800 learn about how all 1.00
02:01:31.600 religions are just a 1.00
02:01:32.320 control mechanism for 1.00
02:01:33.340 it's like fuck man um 1.00
02:01:36.980 but i was that guy 1.00
02:01:38.560 though you know
02:01:39.340 obviously i was going to
02:01:40.340 school when i was
02:01:40.880 homeless i was that
02:01:42.340 well for a while and
02:01:43.840 then i stopped and
02:01:44.440 then i got kicked out
02:01:45.140 of school for not
02:01:45.640 going anymore um but
02:01:47.520 i was that guy who
02:01:49.380 was trying to tell
02:01:51.580 everybody about all the
02:01:52.360 craziest things because
02:01:53.000 it wasn't just like you
02:01:53.920 know you get off the
02:01:54.720 hollywood symbolism and 0.99
02:01:55.780 all that other shit and 0.98
02:01:57.100 it does lead to like the 0.99
02:01:58.880 new world order and it
02:02:00.500 does lead to like
02:02:01.780 depopulation agendas
02:02:03.280 uh manufactured viruses
02:02:06.000 you name it the gambit
02:02:07.400 whatever you think is hot
02:02:09.820 in conspiracy now has
02:02:11.080 been hot in conspiracy
02:02:12.120 since well before i got
02:02:13.940 into it so um somebody
02:02:18.080 asked i think a
02:02:18.820 subliminal messenger said
02:02:19.560 you weren't reading these
02:02:20.340 occult books or grimoires
02:02:21.680 like no there was you know
02:02:25.040 what it was i i wasn't
02:02:28.540 ready to commit to
02:02:29.440 anything and i think
02:02:32.060 reading this might sound
02:02:34.140 like a an excuse for my 1.00
02:02:35.380 own stupidity and it 1.00
02:02:36.420 likely is but i think when 1.00
02:02:37.920 you commit to reading an
02:02:40.660 entire book you are
02:02:42.840 invested in the opinion
02:02:45.100 of an author and a
02:02:46.740 narrative more so than
02:02:48.440 if you just watch it
02:02:49.380 because of the time and
02:02:50.940 dedication it takes
02:02:51.960 you know like i'm gonna
02:02:55.220 see this through that
02:02:56.220 kind of thing yeah and
02:02:56.960 it's like a book can keep
02:02:58.540 you there for you might
02:02:59.260 be reading a book for a 1.00
02:03:00.000 fucking month you know 0.99
02:03:02.200 it's not like um and 0.99
02:03:04.320 it's not passive you got
02:03:05.500 to be locked in if i watch
02:03:07.160 a series for a month i
02:03:09.600 could be texting and 0.99
02:03:10.320 shit while it's on you 0.97
02:03:11.080 know like not really 1.00
02:03:11.580 paying attention i'm not
02:03:12.540 that invested in it but
02:03:14.540 like there have been
02:03:16.400 people in this space who
02:03:17.500 when we talk to them all
02:03:18.940 they do is refer to the
02:03:20.220 works of authors and
02:03:21.980 experts in the field and i
02:03:24.080 think that the problem
02:03:24.980 is if you find out that
02:03:27.760 like what you invested all
02:03:30.480 that time in is a lie you
02:03:33.260 might be more likely to go
02:03:35.740 no you're just
02:03:36.500 misinterpreting you
02:03:37.140 misunderstanding it no
02:03:38.080 like you're wrong because 0.98
02:03:39.800 there's no fucking way 0.95
02:03:40.400 that i just read that book 0.98
02:03:41.160 for a month and i'm wrong 0.97
02:03:42.620 like get the fuck out of 0.98
02:03:43.260 here so i never did that 0.90
02:03:45.240 i would i would look at
02:03:46.160 everything pulled away
02:03:47.620 from a distance there was
02:03:50.180 one moment in my life where
02:03:52.200 i became very close to
02:03:54.080 zeroing in on the
02:03:55.280 teachings of one person
02:03:56.440 and then i met my wife
02:04:00.080 and i became totally
02:04:01.940 infatuated with infatuated 0.81
02:04:03.400 with her and put that down 0.94
02:04:04.560 and thank god because that
02:04:06.600 one person was crowley
02:04:07.800 whoa yeah this could have
02:04:10.140 been a very different
02:04:10.860 podcast i was getting i was
02:04:13.740 in my third or this would
02:04:15.140 have been cult of
02:04:15.740 conspiracy yeah exactly i
02:04:18.240 was in my third or fourth
02:04:19.360 crowley documentary and i was
02:04:21.520 getting uh i was looking up
02:04:23.660 the books lieber 777 and a
02:04:25.920 couple of other ones um book
02:04:27.800 of the law i think and i was
02:04:29.240 gonna get them um it was like i
02:04:32.200 was i was making a decision
02:04:33.900 like all right let's see what
02:04:35.520 the hell this is really
02:04:36.300 about because i had gotten
02:04:37.960 through all of the cursory 0.98
02:04:41.140 shit and i was sure that there 0.99
02:04:44.000 was something there and the 1.00
02:04:45.860 only thing that was going to
02:04:46.720 enable me to go deeper in that
02:04:48.220 something was to start reading
02:04:51.300 it um yeah mr eugenics is i knew
02:04:55.900 you were gonna say crowley very
02:04:56.880 cringy very like crowley is the if 1.00
02:05:00.080 you say that you're a fucking punk 0.99
02:05:02.080 rock fan and then i go like who do 1.00
02:05:03.480 you listen to and you're like
02:05:04.640 rancid it's like that's the guy
02:05:06.860 that's the thing you know that's
02:05:08.400 the the iconic thing associated 0.99
02:05:10.840 with that shit so um i did read 0.99
02:05:14.100 some of his stuff like uh uh what 1.00
02:05:16.160 was that um cecilia's farts read
02:05:20.780 that one that was a good poem about 0.99
02:05:23.080 a hooker's farts what do you want 1.00
02:05:24.520 mason you ever read a poem about a 1.00
02:05:26.980 hooker's farts 1.00
02:05:27.540 i guess you're not cool god damn it 1.00
02:05:34.180 what are you doing god she smells 1.00
02:05:35.700 get out of here all right bye mason 0.92
02:05:36.880 smell like coffee
02:05:37.740 goodbye are you leaving no can you
02:05:43.320 open that door too please okay
02:05:46.600 never mind don't open that door then
02:05:47.580 thank you though thank you for
02:05:49.840 opening that one she's good
02:05:51.360 mason's the best so um all right now
02:05:56.040 i that is by the way
02:05:59.980 i i think i've read
02:06:03.320 i went i read whitley striver's book
02:06:06.620 i think i read it twice
02:06:08.020 and i read i am legend i was very
02:06:12.060 upset when they turned it into a black 0.84
02:06:13.300 guy because it's a white dude in the
02:06:14.540 in the book
02:06:15.000 that might be it
02:06:18.820 that might be it as far as books that
02:06:22.980 i've read that might be it i i get i
02:06:25.920 all of my research is done through
02:06:28.120 number one like documentary or
02:06:29.980 audio book or podcast and conversation
02:06:33.000 that's it
02:06:34.720 um maybe there's something to be said
02:06:37.020 if i actually read it
02:06:37.860 it might stick with me and my
02:06:39.680 information recall will be better but
02:06:41.120 so
02:06:42.140 i guess um i'm gonna get through one
02:06:47.040 more really repetitive story
02:06:48.760 which you know is going to be a
02:06:50.640 little bit of a of a grind for the
02:06:52.160 audience but i have to do it because
02:06:53.620 it's got to be in the book
02:06:54.500 i i go through this whole period
02:06:59.100 with my wife
02:06:59.820 and you know we fall in love
02:07:04.140 we get married we have a kid
02:07:06.680 and everything is wonderful
02:07:10.320 and all of a sudden like the 0.99
02:07:14.400 supernatural shit gets put back on 1.00
02:07:16.960 the table 1.00
02:07:17.460 in a really big way
02:07:19.480 there are a couple of moments
02:07:22.640 after my son is born
02:07:24.000 we live in aunt margaret's house
02:07:26.140 that creepy house up in the
02:07:27.140 mountains
02:07:27.420 in new jersey
02:07:28.480 i didn't experience anything
02:07:31.440 i don't think
02:07:32.100 that i can remember
02:07:32.900 my son had two moments
02:07:34.440 one
02:07:35.340 he's a toddler
02:07:38.540 couldn't have been more than like
02:07:39.940 two or three
02:07:40.580 he walks
02:07:42.760 down the stairs
02:07:44.960 you go down the stairs
02:07:47.380 there's a landing
02:07:48.180 then you go down the stairs again
02:07:49.560 and you're in a finished basement
02:07:50.800 he walks down the stairs
02:07:53.460 stands on the landing
02:07:56.040 looks into the basement
02:07:57.700 the darkness of it
02:07:58.680 and starts screaming
02:08:00.780 thank god
02:08:04.760 he's too young
02:08:06.780 to be able to articulate it all
02:08:08.780 what he saw
02:08:10.640 but
02:08:11.660 looking down at him
02:08:13.820 looking into the basement
02:08:15.940 he was looking at something
02:08:18.420 it wasn't just like
02:08:20.900 you know
02:08:21.740 like he was locked on to something
02:08:24.240 and screaming 0.96
02:08:25.140 we ran downstairs
02:08:27.340 we grab him
02:08:27.980 and you know we pull him back upstairs
02:08:29.200 and everything's good
02:08:29.940 but years later i would find out
02:08:33.080 there's a documentary
02:08:37.060 on
02:08:38.580 i don't know what it is
02:08:39.580 prime or netflix
02:08:40.460 and it's about sleep paralysis
02:08:41.560 and
02:08:41.920 i had made a real effort 0.99
02:08:43.780 to keep any of this shit away 0.99
02:08:44.740 from my kid 0.99
02:08:45.160 when i was
02:08:45.540 when he was younger
02:08:46.280 because like i said
02:08:47.160 i don't want to traumatize him
02:08:48.220 i don't want to lose sleep
02:08:49.640 things like that
02:08:51.100 i don't need him coming to my room
02:08:52.100 freaking out
02:08:52.720 and
02:08:54.480 i wasn't even watching it
02:08:56.340 it was just
02:08:56.980 on the
02:08:57.820 you know
02:08:58.040 when you look at like netflix
02:08:59.060 or amazon
02:08:59.920 there's a whole list
02:09:01.620 of like things you could watch
02:09:02.680 one of them is a sleep paralysis documentary
02:09:05.020 and it's got an image of like
02:09:06.540 the hat man i think
02:09:07.600 as its thumbnail
02:09:08.800 it wasn't the focus
02:09:11.000 it wasn't what we were looking at
02:09:11.940 it wasn't what we were hovering over
02:09:13.320 but he sees it
02:09:14.080 and he goes
02:09:14.360 i've seen that guy before
02:09:15.460 and i go 1.00
02:09:17.420 fuck 1.00
02:09:18.080 and 1.00
02:09:20.440 and
02:09:20.780 the way that i
02:09:22.040 dealt with it
02:09:23.160 is like i've never been reactive
02:09:24.400 to any of that stuff
02:09:25.480 whenever he says something
02:09:27.200 like weird like that
02:09:27.920 so i just kind of go like
02:09:29.000 oh
02:09:30.060 oh yeah
02:09:31.640 and he goes
02:09:33.040 yeah
02:09:33.320 when we were in the blue house
02:09:35.180 which is at margaret's house
02:09:36.220 i go
02:09:37.780 oh wow
02:09:38.460 it's probably like a dream
02:09:40.600 he goes
02:09:41.060 i don't know
02:09:41.860 i woke up
02:09:43.340 and
02:09:44.400 i was stuck to the bed
02:09:45.980 with belts
02:09:46.600 and that man
02:09:49.700 was walking
02:09:50.360 up and down the hallway
02:09:51.480 outside of my room
02:09:53.180 and i was like
02:09:55.680 belts
02:09:56.640 and he goes
02:09:57.920 yeah
02:09:58.220 couldn't move
02:09:59.460 uh stuck in the bed
02:10:01.220 there was belts
02:10:01.880 tying me to the bed
02:10:02.840 jeez
02:10:03.660 and i said
02:10:04.020 what did he do
02:10:04.640 he said nothing
02:10:05.200 he would just look at me
02:10:06.120 and i went
02:10:08.020 all right
02:10:08.800 and he goes
02:10:09.080 yeah sometimes
02:10:09.780 i would look out my window
02:10:12.300 and he'd be standing
02:10:13.860 in the driveway
02:10:14.540 looking up at my window 0.99
02:10:15.640 fuck 0.99
02:10:18.560 nothing to see here 1.00
02:10:23.000 nothing to see here
02:10:23.800 nothing to do here
02:10:24.580 nothing to
02:10:25.060 so
02:10:26.240 that's about it
02:10:28.800 until
02:10:29.200 uh we leave that place
02:10:30.600 we move to vegas
02:10:31.420 and
02:10:31.920 um after vegas
02:10:33.420 we move back to new jersey
02:10:34.480 when we move back to new jersey
02:10:35.540 we land in the in-laws
02:10:36.500 they give us a room to stay in
02:10:38.660 we're only there for like a month
02:10:39.980 month and a half
02:10:40.580 before we get an apartment
02:10:41.460 and get out of there 0.98
02:10:42.160 i just couldn't
02:10:43.180 i was like
02:10:43.520 just you know
02:10:44.760 living with the in-laws
02:10:46.280 god bless them
02:10:47.160 so
02:10:47.880 in that time
02:10:50.240 um
02:10:51.060 i've talked about this before
02:10:53.000 i think that i was
02:10:54.100 i was depressed
02:10:55.940 and i was
02:10:56.420 angry and
02:10:58.160 and anxious
02:10:59.260 and all these different things
02:11:00.120 and i think that i was feeding something
02:11:01.420 that was there
02:11:02.180 um i think it's the same thing
02:11:04.520 that her brother
02:11:05.120 used to deal with
02:11:06.020 when he was a kid
02:11:06.720 i think it had been sitting in that
02:11:07.980 apartment for a long time
02:11:09.200 and it was feeding off of me
02:11:11.340 and so
02:11:12.660 i have this four night escapade
02:11:15.220 where
02:11:17.480 on night number one
02:11:20.220 um
02:11:21.320 i can feel something
02:11:22.800 no
02:11:25.400 i hear something
02:11:26.760 banging on the door
02:11:28.740 like really loud
02:11:30.920 boom boom boom boom boom
02:11:31.600 and i pop up out of bed
02:11:34.020 and i go and look out the window
02:11:35.000 i'm on the second floor
02:11:35.840 and i'm looking down at the front door
02:11:37.560 and nothing's there
02:11:38.940 i get back in bed
02:11:41.280 i fall asleep
02:11:42.020 as soon as i drift off
02:11:43.160 the same thing happens again
02:11:44.100 it happens as soon as you drift off
02:11:45.840 as soon as you enter sleep
02:11:47.660 which is very stressful
02:11:49.380 um
02:11:50.560 because you just want to sleep
02:11:52.060 but
02:11:52.820 it happens again
02:11:54.060 i jump out of bed
02:11:55.360 and i look down
02:11:55.980 and there's still nobody at the door
02:11:57.240 yeah that's it
02:11:58.780 that's it
02:11:59.200 uh
02:12:00.820 have you seen this man
02:12:02.140 yeah
02:12:02.520 yeah 0.98
02:12:03.580 i fucking have 0.99
02:12:04.540 or at least uh 1.00
02:12:05.680 my son has
02:12:06.480 i never
02:12:06.820 i never saw specifically
02:12:07.860 the guy with the hat
02:12:08.620 i don't think
02:12:09.040 and um
02:12:10.580 i realized that like
02:12:13.460 nobody else is hearing this
02:12:14.380 my wife's not hearing it
02:12:15.480 my son is still asleep
02:12:16.840 the in-laws haven't gotten up
02:12:18.660 and checked the door
02:12:19.420 so i'm like okay
02:12:20.720 maybe this is all in my head
02:12:21.860 and um
02:12:23.360 i
02:12:25.560 i drift off again
02:12:27.660 and it happens again
02:12:28.520 and i
02:12:30.340 i look around
02:12:31.060 still nobody's awake
02:12:32.060 so i'm just
02:12:32.860 dealing with the idea
02:12:33.780 that like this is happening
02:12:34.620 to me
02:12:35.060 only
02:12:35.660 so i open my phone up
02:12:37.480 and i just start scrolling
02:12:38.580 the internet
02:12:39.280 you know
02:12:39.780 on social media
02:12:40.860 because i'm too afraid
02:12:42.120 to go to sleep
02:12:42.700 and eventually
02:12:44.920 i guess i fall asleep
02:12:45.780 i wake up
02:12:46.280 i go to work
02:12:46.900 next day comes
02:12:49.180 this time when i'm sleeping
02:12:50.260 uh something pulls my arm
02:12:52.720 now the previous night
02:12:55.400 i had filed away
02:12:56.280 what was happening to me
02:12:57.340 under a phenomenon
02:12:58.320 called uh
02:12:59.180 exploding head syndrome
02:13:00.500 goodbye mason
02:13:02.540 bye
02:13:02.880 um
02:13:04.740 which is like
02:13:06.040 you know
02:13:06.960 the the industry
02:13:07.940 has the medical industry
02:13:09.340 or not the medical industry
02:13:10.180 but the mental health industry
02:13:11.520 i don't know what you would call it 1.00
02:13:12.680 has the stupidest 1.00
02:13:13.860 fucking terminologies 1.00
02:13:14.840 for these things 1.00
02:13:15.540 don't worry about sleep paralysis
02:13:17.500 that's not demonic
02:13:18.260 that's just
02:13:18.660 don't worry about
02:13:19.860 the noises you're hearing
02:13:20.880 that's exploding head syndrome
02:13:22.400 which is just really funny
02:13:23.780 it's like
02:13:24.080 these people give a name
02:13:25.540 to a phenomenon
02:13:26.300 and then we go like
02:13:27.540 oh
02:13:27.920 thank goodness
02:13:29.080 thank goodness
02:13:29.920 it's just exploding head syndrome
02:13:31.460 so
02:13:32.880 um
02:13:33.860 i had already filed away
02:13:34.920 under that
02:13:35.240 now
02:13:35.580 i'm getting my arm pulled
02:13:37.380 and i'm thinking that
02:13:38.120 i'm just spasming
02:13:38.900 so i fall asleep
02:13:41.220 and it happens again
02:13:42.180 my arm gets pulled again
02:13:43.160 now i'm a little bit creeped out
02:13:44.300 so i put my arms under the pillow
02:13:45.860 i mean under the blanket
02:13:47.240 and the weight of the blanket
02:13:48.640 i expect
02:13:49.220 will at least keep my arms
02:13:50.260 from going all the way up in the air
02:13:51.420 and then my leg gets pulled
02:13:53.940 um
02:13:56.000 i then scroll my phone
02:13:58.440 until the wee hours of the morning
02:13:59.980 because i'm freaked out
02:14:00.980 and i go to work
02:14:02.700 third night happens
02:14:05.040 and um
02:14:06.760 i had this nightmare
02:14:07.600 of this entity
02:14:08.740 and i've described this entity before
02:14:10.180 it's like
02:14:10.620 it's kind of jacked
02:14:12.200 it's um
02:14:13.200 it's got skin
02:14:14.660 that is
02:14:15.740 kind of leopard print
02:14:16.900 but the colors are gray
02:14:18.280 and black
02:14:19.000 and it's not hairy
02:14:20.560 uh
02:14:22.020 it's got fangs
02:14:24.140 lower
02:14:24.660 canid fangs
02:14:25.880 that are so big
02:14:27.040 they come up
02:14:27.700 and out of its mouth
02:14:28.580 they overlap
02:14:29.480 its upper lip
02:14:30.200 it's got bright
02:14:32.240 red eyes
02:14:33.140 like illuminated red eyes
02:14:34.280 you hear this a lot too
02:14:35.120 when it comes to these entities
02:14:35.980 whether it's demonic
02:14:36.680 or cryptids
02:14:37.380 illuminated eyes
02:14:38.840 and um
02:14:41.460 and it looks like
02:14:43.080 it's full of rage
02:14:43.760 and its chest
02:14:45.880 is heaving
02:14:46.620 and collapsing
02:14:47.260 and its fists
02:14:47.960 are in a ball
02:14:48.660 and it's just
02:14:50.360 mad
02:14:52.320 and it's looking at me
02:14:53.780 and i'm looking at it
02:14:54.460 and i have no awareness
02:14:55.260 of my body
02:14:55.860 i'm just observing this thing
02:14:57.440 and it's got like
02:14:58.260 black mist swirling
02:14:59.200 around its legs
02:14:59.780 and that's all i remember
02:15:01.640 i wake up in the morning
02:15:04.100 and the first thing
02:15:04.820 i haven't told my wife 0.99
02:15:05.600 about any of this shit 0.99
02:15:06.300 because i don't want to freak her out 0.99
02:15:07.160 my wife tells me
02:15:08.860 that she had a nightmare
02:15:10.320 i haven't shared anything with her
02:15:11.580 i've kept it to myself
02:15:12.240 i go oh
02:15:12.840 okay
02:15:13.940 she goes yeah
02:15:15.320 i couldn't move
02:15:17.100 i woke up
02:15:18.260 i felt like i was awake
02:15:19.080 i'm in the room
02:15:19.800 and i can't move my body
02:15:22.160 but i can move my eyes
02:15:24.380 and i'm struggling
02:15:25.460 to look over to you
02:15:26.640 and like turn my head
02:15:27.680 just a little bit
02:15:28.320 to get a better view
02:15:29.040 and there's something
02:15:30.280 on your chest
02:15:31.460 there's a monster 0.99
02:15:32.860 on your chest 0.98
02:15:34.000 and it's choking you
02:15:35.260 into the bed
02:15:36.280 and she says
02:15:37.820 it's got big teeth
02:15:38.700 and bright red eyes 0.98
02:15:40.240 and i 0.99
02:15:41.120 almost shit 0.99
02:15:42.400 but i keep it to myself 0.99
02:15:45.000 because now i'm really freaked out
02:15:46.720 now it's not exploding head syndrome
02:15:48.220 now it's not just spasms
02:15:49.700 now it's something else
02:15:51.180 and it's not just happening to me
02:15:52.420 it's happening to my wife
02:15:53.300 but i'm afraid to even talk about it
02:15:54.800 because i don't want to feed this situation
02:15:56.260 so i spend the day
02:15:58.200 like i just go 0.97
02:15:59.100 oh that's fucking crazy 0.97
02:15:59.900 i spend the day 0.99
02:16:00.780 trying to figure out
02:16:01.880 like what i'm going to do
02:16:02.580 about this
02:16:03.160 and i
02:16:05.120 i come up with nothing
02:16:09.560 i come home
02:16:11.520 i go to sleep
02:16:12.940 i wake up in the morning
02:16:14.680 to my wife
02:16:15.360 shaking me awake
02:16:17.140 and showing me a recording
02:16:18.100 of my jugular
02:16:19.480 where you would put your finger
02:16:20.840 to check a pulse
02:16:21.480 it's just like throbbing
02:16:22.320 boom boom boom boom boom boom
02:16:23.220 and i'm looking at this going
02:16:25.820 what the hell
02:16:26.300 she's like yeah 0.90
02:16:26.720 i think you were having a bad dream
02:16:27.800 suddenly at the foot of
02:16:29.260 our bed
02:16:30.320 on this twin size air mattress
02:16:31.800 our son starts screaming
02:16:33.800 but he's still asleep
02:16:35.700 and then he sits up
02:16:38.520 and he's screaming
02:16:39.360 but he's still asleep
02:16:40.460 and we rush over to him
02:16:42.860 and we start consoling him
02:16:44.020 and we're
02:16:44.360 petting his face
02:16:45.480 you don't know what the hell to do
02:16:46.360 you're just hugging him
02:16:47.000 and holding him
02:16:47.480 and telling him
02:16:48.380 it's going to be okay 0.99
02:16:49.100 and all this shit 0.99
02:16:50.140 and he's just 1.00
02:16:51.620 rough man
02:16:53.280 and he finally comes around
02:16:54.680 he wakes up
02:16:55.340 and he finally gets to the point
02:16:56.480 where he can talk
02:16:57.080 and what he starts to say is
02:16:58.640 monster
02:17:00.460 red eyes 0.63
02:17:02.320 big teeth
02:17:03.040 so
02:17:04.800 that moment
02:17:05.920 was a real problem for me
02:17:08.440 because it was happening
02:17:09.080 not only to
02:17:09.720 me
02:17:10.500 and not only to my wife
02:17:11.500 but now my son
02:17:12.280 so the next night
02:17:14.580 out of desperation
02:17:16.080 i don't know how to solve this issue
02:17:17.740 for the first time in my life
02:17:20.700 i pray to jesus christ
02:17:22.180 never was raised religious
02:17:23.620 grandma was a crystal ball
02:17:25.300 lady
02:17:25.960 you know
02:17:26.320 um
02:17:27.440 never did that ever
02:17:29.520 i had talked to god before
02:17:31.600 but a very non-specific god
02:17:33.740 like god
02:17:34.760 why am i homeless
02:17:35.620 the universe
02:17:36.560 the universe
02:17:37.180 sure
02:17:37.600 you know
02:17:38.040 something like that
02:17:38.800 this was the first time
02:17:40.320 i ever prayed to christ
02:17:41.700 and the whole phenomenon stopped
02:17:43.620 that was around
02:17:46.360 2020
02:17:48.000 the same time
02:17:50.380 the same month
02:17:54.340 that was the last time
02:17:56.120 i ever talked to barbara
02:17:57.140 it was the lockdowns
02:18:00.400 so many crazy things were happening
02:18:04.620 i don't even know if i told her
02:18:05.760 but that
02:18:08.560 was the first time that like
02:18:11.080 if you could see it in the spiritual realm
02:18:13.200 it was like
02:18:14.840 god was always there
02:18:16.120 and this is the first time
02:18:17.620 i just kind of turned towards him
02:18:19.440 didn't start stepping towards him
02:18:21.600 didn't do anything
02:18:22.160 i just turned towards him
02:18:23.380 not gonna lie
02:18:26.300 this show contributed to me
02:18:27.580 blessing and anointing my children
02:18:29.000 nearly every night before bed
02:18:30.460 i'm glad to hear it
02:18:31.240 that's a good move dude
02:18:32.100 we actually just got another uh
02:18:34.340 a message on instagram
02:18:36.020 which i i want to answer back
02:18:37.660 but i just didn't have the time to
02:18:39.080 answer meaningfully
02:18:40.480 is this um dorian
02:18:42.000 yes but so many of these
02:18:43.300 come in all the time
02:18:44.160 um that's a brag
02:18:45.580 it's just like
02:18:46.140 we get them
02:18:47.720 uh
02:18:48.500 about how the show
02:18:49.540 is helping them
02:18:50.160 or has helped change
02:18:51.440 uh their outlook
02:18:52.660 and how they're
02:18:53.680 how they're behaving
02:18:54.460 afterward
02:18:55.240 and it's like
02:18:55.820 if i just go like
02:18:57.520 at it like
02:18:57.960 there there are so many
02:18:59.320 that i i just feel bad
02:19:00.580 doing like a thumbs up
02:19:01.720 or something
02:19:02.080 yeah yeah
02:19:02.800 like a heart or a fire
02:19:03.980 i don't know
02:19:04.440 well shout out to dorian
02:19:05.420 he's number one
02:19:06.180 jack to the gills
02:19:06.920 and number two
02:19:07.540 uh
02:19:08.080 says this show
02:19:09.000 has brought them
02:19:10.660 closer to god
02:19:11.260 and helped them
02:19:11.700 understand and
02:19:12.360 thanks me too
02:19:13.580 yeah
02:19:14.260 well that's what it is
02:19:15.460 that's that's
02:19:15.880 that's what it's all about
02:19:16.740 i mean when i say
02:19:17.540 that that was the time
02:19:18.440 that i oriented
02:19:19.140 towards god
02:19:20.240 eventually it would
02:19:22.280 lead to me
02:19:23.020 taking that old
02:19:24.840 system
02:19:25.720 of like
02:19:26.600 let's research
02:19:27.280 let's talk about this
02:19:28.180 let's figure this out
02:19:29.120 that i
02:19:29.780 applied to like
02:19:30.880 sleep paralysis
02:19:31.500 and the hat man 1.00
02:19:32.140 and shit 1.00
02:19:32.400 and aim that 1.00
02:19:33.640 at god instead
02:19:35.120 and that's that's
02:19:35.860 really what this show
02:19:36.800 is that's where you
02:19:37.660 found me
02:19:38.260 um
02:19:39.300 when i was doing
02:19:41.060 the raven's watch
02:19:41.840 and it was like a slow
02:19:43.060 go like i was just
02:19:44.200 starting to make a show
02:19:45.400 about these things
02:19:47.740 i was finally ready to
02:19:48.680 talk about them
02:19:49.520 after years of
02:19:50.780 you know
02:19:51.540 researching and
02:19:52.320 experiencing
02:19:52.900 and i was ready to
02:19:54.540 make a show about it
02:19:56.180 and then
02:19:57.320 i'm glad that we
02:19:59.320 started doing this
02:20:00.020 because this was
02:20:00.700 much more
02:20:01.780 and even still
02:20:02.360 like you know
02:20:02.640 we say in the beginning
02:20:03.200 it wasn't really aimed
02:20:03.900 at god
02:20:04.240 but it was still
02:20:05.020 much
02:20:06.080 closer
02:20:07.180 than like the raven's
02:20:10.280 watch was
02:20:10.880 the raven's watch
02:20:11.840 was still a little bit
02:20:12.880 but
02:20:15.020 we have those experiences
02:20:17.640 and and
02:20:18.480 we move into a house
02:20:19.840 after that
02:20:20.340 we get out of the in-laws
02:20:21.160 and there are
02:20:22.180 strange things
02:20:24.400 shadows
02:20:24.820 in the house
02:20:25.940 we lived in a project
02:20:27.100 building that was
02:20:28.140 um
02:20:28.540 you know
02:20:29.360 it's filled with
02:20:29.940 sadness
02:20:30.400 and uh
02:20:32.060 i had already come to
02:20:32.920 the conclusion that
02:20:33.860 we human beings
02:20:35.760 have a way of
02:20:36.340 feeding these entities
02:20:37.200 and i think that
02:20:37.920 when you live in a
02:20:38.420 project building
02:20:39.080 they're well fed
02:20:40.660 so i would see
02:20:42.780 it looked like a
02:20:43.780 small child
02:20:44.760 all the time
02:20:45.940 in the house
02:20:46.420 my wife would see 0.99
02:20:47.560 it
02:20:47.800 but that was it
02:20:49.460 there was nothing
02:20:49.840 really there
02:20:50.360 that was too crazy
02:20:51.680 and then from there
02:20:53.660 we moved to florida
02:20:54.460 and it was a really
02:20:55.920 weird time in my
02:20:57.200 life because
02:20:58.220 you know my whole
02:21:00.260 childhood was filled
02:21:01.020 with instability
02:21:02.220 i had nobody
02:21:03.700 in my life
02:21:04.340 for a very long
02:21:05.460 amount of time
02:21:06.220 to to teach me
02:21:08.500 like anything
02:21:09.080 so
02:21:10.100 for me
02:21:12.960 moving to florida
02:21:14.980 and buying our
02:21:16.360 first home
02:21:17.000 was like
02:21:17.640 almost a miracle
02:21:20.180 for you know
02:21:22.380 by all measures
02:21:23.660 i should have been
02:21:24.600 an addict
02:21:27.180 or in jail
02:21:28.580 or like that
02:21:29.400 the idea that i
02:21:31.140 could have ever 0.99
02:21:31.580 gotten my shit 0.83
02:21:32.280 together enough 0.76
02:21:33.140 to live a normal
02:21:34.340 life
02:21:34.900 and really it was
02:21:36.120 because of my
02:21:36.600 wife
02:21:36.900 it was because
02:21:38.120 i wanted
02:21:40.100 to 0.99
02:21:40.960 not suck 1.00
02:21:44.260 for her 0.95
02:21:45.280 and then of course
02:21:46.920 having our son
02:21:47.580 it was like okay
02:21:48.140 this you have to
02:21:48.840 figure this out
02:21:49.360 and i tried for a
02:21:50.000 long time and i
02:21:50.540 failed miserably
02:21:51.200 and eventually i got
02:21:52.000 to the point where
02:21:52.520 it was like
02:21:52.860 i can do this
02:21:54.640 and we get this
02:21:56.860 house in florida
02:21:57.660 and it's
02:21:59.540 it's weird man
02:22:02.340 it's weird because
02:22:03.900 all of a sudden
02:22:05.480 in florida
02:22:06.720 my father lived
02:22:08.180 who you know
02:22:09.900 i had seen enough
02:22:11.200 times to count on
02:22:11.900 two hands throughout
02:22:12.500 my entire life
02:22:13.220 and um
02:22:14.640 and so did all of
02:22:16.000 his side of the
02:22:16.560 family
02:22:16.880 they lived in the
02:22:18.460 town that i moved
02:22:19.120 to and i think in
02:22:20.280 some ways i was
02:22:20.840 trying to like
02:22:21.460 trying to give my
02:22:23.060 son a family
02:22:23.940 because i didn't
02:22:25.700 have one
02:22:26.100 and i just
02:22:27.320 wanted him to
02:22:27.860 have cousins
02:22:28.440 and and aunts
02:22:29.560 and uncles
02:22:29.920 and grandparents
02:22:30.620 and i did i
02:22:32.480 managed to give
02:22:33.020 him that
02:22:33.360 i learned a lot
02:22:34.760 of really hard
02:22:35.260 lessons about
02:22:36.040 you know who
02:22:36.560 my dad was
02:22:37.600 and all these
02:22:38.000 other things
02:22:38.540 but like i did
02:22:39.540 manage to give
02:22:40.380 my son
02:22:41.020 family
02:22:42.720 not to the
02:22:44.300 extent that i
02:22:44.700 would have liked
02:22:45.060 it but
02:22:45.460 they they
02:22:47.520 received me
02:22:48.320 like i was
02:22:49.360 you know
02:22:51.160 what is it
02:22:52.980 the prodigal
02:22:53.360 son
02:22:53.600 yeah
02:22:54.300 like
02:22:55.320 they hadn't
02:22:57.240 seen me
02:22:57.560 since i was
02:22:57.960 a toddler
02:22:58.400 and i show
02:23:00.100 up and i
02:23:01.200 had an
02:23:01.960 unbelievable
02:23:02.520 amount of
02:23:02.980 drive at
02:23:03.760 the time
02:23:04.120 and
02:23:06.280 i was getting
02:23:08.500 all these
02:23:08.820 things like
02:23:09.260 how could
02:23:09.680 you have
02:23:09.920 turned out
02:23:10.380 so good
02:23:10.900 you had
02:23:11.900 nothing
02:23:12.280 and then
02:23:14.880 they watched
02:23:15.400 me
02:23:15.880 land a
02:23:18.240 welding job
02:23:18.980 and they're
02:23:20.060 like holy 0.99
02:23:20.420 shit look 0.99
02:23:20.900 at him go 0.99
02:23:21.300 this is
02:23:21.920 all like
02:23:22.320 in you
02:23:22.740 know
02:23:22.860 in a month
02:23:23.660 and a half
02:23:24.080 of arriving
02:23:24.680 and then i
02:23:26.440 close on a
02:23:27.020 house in that
02:23:27.580 same month
02:23:28.060 and a half
02:23:28.540 and they go 1.00
02:23:28.900 holy shit 1.00
02:23:29.760 look at him 0.99
02:23:30.180 go and i'm
02:23:30.620 just like in
02:23:31.160 this season
02:23:31.720 dude
02:23:32.080 where like all
02:23:33.560 of a sudden i
02:23:34.320 feel um
02:23:37.200 i i i don't
02:23:42.980 know i was
02:23:45.300 homeless like 1.00
02:23:45.960 and all these
02:23:46.640 things for so
02:23:47.280 long and then
02:23:47.780 now i'm being
02:23:49.080 celebrated for
02:23:50.260 how
02:23:50.820 impressive i
02:23:54.900 am
02:23:55.160 and wouldn't
02:23:57.660 you know it
02:23:58.200 do you believe
02:23:58.820 it
02:23:59.020 um i think
02:24:01.540 that i have
02:24:02.520 a a pretty
02:24:04.060 crazy drive
02:24:05.000 when i lock
02:24:06.360 into something
02:24:07.000 but like i
02:24:08.940 think everybody
02:24:09.420 has it and
02:24:11.060 i don't think
02:24:11.560 that i'm like
02:24:11.980 uh different
02:24:12.980 in any way
02:24:14.260 i think that
02:24:14.860 i was driven
02:24:16.960 by this
02:24:17.760 desire to
02:24:20.440 prove myself
02:24:21.000 a lot of
02:24:21.300 people don't
02:24:21.600 have that
02:24:22.160 because they
02:24:23.500 don't need
02:24:24.020 to i think
02:24:25.180 it's only when
02:24:25.720 you exist 1.00
02:24:27.120 in shit 1.00
02:24:27.720 if you 1.00
02:24:29.900 could ever
02:24:30.280 get about
02:24:31.800 yourself the
02:24:32.560 idea that
02:24:33.220 maybe you
02:24:33.920 could be
02:24:34.520 something more
02:24:35.300 that's a real
02:24:36.280 that's a real
02:24:37.120 driving force
02:24:37.820 i think human
02:24:38.960 beings historically
02:24:39.900 are capable of
02:24:40.640 unbelievable things
02:24:41.420 we all are
02:24:42.600 we just need to
02:24:43.420 be put in the
02:24:43.980 right fire
02:24:44.480 so yeah in
02:24:46.660 that moment i
02:24:47.280 know what i
02:24:47.660 was doing
02:24:48.120 um
02:24:49.940 yes my son
02:24:52.980 does dress
02:24:53.640 uh better than
02:24:54.680 his dad because
02:24:55.200 he has a dad
02:24:55.840 that is true
02:24:56.420 um but
02:24:58.880 yeah i mean
02:24:59.300 it's all about
02:25:00.080 the fire that
02:25:00.640 you're putting
02:25:00.900 human beings
02:25:01.560 without trials
02:25:03.300 and tribulations
02:25:04.080 um it's sad
02:25:06.320 it is not
02:25:09.740 something that i
02:25:10.460 would wish on
02:25:11.160 somebody to go
02:25:11.940 through the
02:25:12.260 things that i
02:25:12.760 went through
02:25:13.180 but also i
02:25:14.260 know that they
02:25:14.820 made me in
02:25:17.120 that moment where
02:25:17.820 they were saying
02:25:18.300 those things i
02:25:19.160 know i was
02:25:19.620 displaying those
02:25:20.460 things
02:25:20.820 and that's
02:25:23.340 just like if
02:25:24.480 somebody's a
02:25:24.940 good fighter
02:25:25.480 because they
02:25:26.440 spent a long
02:25:26.980 time in the
02:25:27.440 gym
02:25:27.700 like yeah
02:25:29.320 does that make
02:25:30.500 them special
02:25:31.100 like i don't
02:25:31.880 know you put
02:25:32.260 enough hours in
02:25:32.800 the gym it's
02:25:33.400 just in my
02:25:33.840 case the gym
02:25:34.440 was the dumpster
02:25:35.120 behind dunkin
02:25:35.860 donuts
02:25:36.160 you know
02:25:37.660 um
02:25:38.840 that's what i
02:25:39.940 was asking
02:25:40.420 specifically it's
02:25:41.600 like
02:25:41.800 when you're
02:25:43.920 around when
02:25:44.860 you're around
02:25:45.200 these type of
02:25:45.680 people who
02:25:46.660 haven't accomplished
02:25:47.440 that thing
02:25:48.020 you can believe
02:25:49.700 what they're
02:25:51.060 saying about
02:25:51.620 you and i
02:25:52.520 think it's
02:25:52.820 right but i
02:25:54.620 also think that
02:25:55.160 there's more
02:25:55.820 and i know
02:25:56.640 well obviously
02:25:57.140 we're here in
02:25:58.540 the story we're
02:25:59.380 not two years
02:26:00.060 ago in the
02:26:00.520 story yeah
02:26:01.320 but if you
02:26:02.800 would have
02:26:03.020 believed that i
02:26:03.840 know a lot of
02:26:04.460 people that
02:26:04.920 believe that
02:26:05.780 hype in that
02:26:07.120 moment and they
02:26:07.760 go i did it i
02:26:09.000 made it and then
02:26:10.040 they stay there
02:26:10.880 yeah well that's
02:26:12.180 a trap because
02:26:12.940 you're you're
02:26:13.780 impressing people
02:26:14.680 who have and
02:26:16.420 it's like it's
02:26:16.840 messed up but
02:26:17.420 they've never
02:26:18.220 really done
02:26:19.280 anything so
02:26:20.240 it's like yeah
02:26:21.740 i just did like
02:26:22.820 a flip and
02:26:23.780 everybody claps
02:26:24.500 it's like yeah
02:26:25.320 that's not
02:26:25.740 really what i'm
02:26:26.500 capable of but
02:26:28.580 i can do this
02:26:29.460 all day you
02:26:30.540 know well it's
02:26:31.260 an interesting
02:26:31.640 observation because
02:26:32.720 i could have
02:26:33.500 stayed there yeah
02:26:34.140 in fact i was
02:26:36.220 entering a part
02:26:37.580 of my life where
02:26:38.920 i was going to
02:26:39.940 be the family
02:26:41.820 man the
02:26:43.180 hard-working
02:26:44.340 welder who
02:26:46.380 had the pool
02:26:47.320 who sometimes
02:26:48.800 through weekend
02:26:49.920 parties where
02:26:51.020 the nieces and
02:26:51.740 nephews came
02:26:52.420 over and they
02:26:53.080 swam it was a
02:26:54.900 real weird i
02:26:57.120 mean i'm
02:26:57.360 describing normal 0.99
02:26:58.140 shit to people 1.00
02:26:58.940 it wasn't to me 1.00
02:27:01.060 man these 0.99
02:27:02.520 fucking barbecues 1.00
02:27:03.680 in my backyard at 1.00
02:27:05.700 my pool with my
02:27:08.040 family celebrating
02:27:09.160 and hugging me and
02:27:10.080 we're drinking 1.00
02:27:10.800 fucking coronas and 1.00
02:27:11.820 lime and we're 1.00
02:27:12.440 grilling meat and
02:27:14.040 we're playing music i
02:27:15.360 never had that in 0.99
02:27:16.420 my fucking life 0.99
02:27:17.400 and it was like 1.00
02:27:21.820 a thing that i
02:27:23.360 could have stayed
02:27:23.920 at but i made a
02:27:28.340 fundamental mistake
02:27:29.100 that's unique to my
02:27:29.940 personality i think
02:27:31.200 and we'll get to
02:27:32.260 that well i i think
02:27:34.240 we'll do that first
02:27:35.020 because there's a
02:27:35.920 more important aspect
02:27:36.780 to this story but
02:27:37.660 i um i took some
02:27:39.780 people with me and
02:27:41.020 when i bought a
02:27:41.560 house i bought a
02:27:42.460 house with the
02:27:44.440 decision to take
02:27:45.900 some people with
02:27:46.480 me and it's
02:27:48.180 nothing against
02:27:49.280 them um i don't
02:27:53.060 think you can
02:27:53.940 drag people to a
02:27:57.560 finish line
02:27:58.020 everybody's walk is
02:27:59.720 their own everybody's
02:28:00.480 story is their own
02:28:01.220 i can't just make a 0.99
02:28:02.420 fucking decision and 0.99
02:28:03.740 and house people and 1.00
02:28:04.940 say it's all going to
02:28:05.560 be okay i'm nobody's
02:28:06.480 you know i'm not
02:28:07.380 their dad and they
02:28:09.720 didn't ask me to be
02:28:10.520 nobody ever asked me
02:28:12.060 to do that i just
02:28:13.420 tried to carry a
02:28:15.800 bunch of people who
02:28:17.260 looked like me who
02:28:19.700 had similar stories
02:28:21.720 as mine and i said
02:28:24.500 i'll work harder i'll
02:28:27.060 make more money i'll
02:28:28.700 make this happen
02:28:29.400 and uh and that
02:28:33.600 wasn't the case it
02:28:36.440 could it couldn't you
02:28:37.300 know part of the
02:28:38.260 reason i also got that
02:28:39.120 house not to put it
02:28:39.800 all on them because
02:28:40.760 that wouldn't be
02:28:41.180 true is for that
02:28:42.940 month and a half i
02:28:43.580 landed with my father
02:28:44.360 who i hadn't lived
02:28:45.300 with since i was
02:28:46.100 three and i quickly
02:28:47.560 found out it ain't
02:28:49.300 all it's cracked up to
02:28:50.080 be plus his wife was a 1.00
02:28:51.420 witch plus plus his 1.00
02:28:53.740 wife was a witch and 1.00
02:28:55.040 um and i mean that in 0.97
02:28:56.340 the most literal sense
02:28:57.260 she's burning effigies in 1.00
02:28:58.700 the backyard and she's 0.70
02:29:00.260 uh trying to put
02:29:01.340 curses on us all kinds 0.99
02:29:02.640 of shit and i had to 1.00
02:29:04.080 get my family out of 1.00
02:29:05.040 there immediately and
02:29:07.260 so within a month and
02:29:07.940 a half we closed on a
02:29:08.760 house and what
02:29:09.180 happened was we lost
02:29:10.020 like a house or two
02:29:10.740 in a bidding war and
02:29:12.900 so the other one i
02:29:13.680 wasn't gonna lose so
02:29:15.460 it was just like yeah
02:29:16.000 dude whatever do i need
02:29:17.040 a four bedroom with a
02:29:17.880 pool even though i'm a
02:29:19.340 family of three no but
02:29:21.740 that's what i did um so
02:29:23.940 even though this is all
02:29:27.820 this like really
02:29:29.280 beautiful moment and
02:29:30.680 it's really it's really
02:29:31.640 tempting right and i
02:29:33.360 could have stayed there 1.00
02:29:34.100 this fucking house is 1.00
02:29:37.640 haunted haunted in in a 1.00
02:29:41.880 way i've never
02:29:42.700 experienced this much
02:29:43.820 activity ever this is
02:29:47.480 the house that gabe's
02:29:48.320 living in and yep and
02:29:50.040 my niece is living in
02:29:51.100 okay and um so it
02:29:55.400 starts off with a knock
02:29:58.940 on the window and we
02:30:03.100 we would all be
02:30:04.200 commiserating you know
02:30:05.280 in the in the in the
02:30:06.500 times between backyard
02:30:09.360 parties just sitting on
02:30:11.480 the sofa watching tv and
02:30:14.480 all of a sudden all of
02:30:14.960 our necks would turn we'd
02:30:16.120 look to the door we'd
02:30:17.240 look to the window that
02:30:18.560 and we'd get up and we'd
02:30:20.960 open the blinds and we'd
02:30:21.860 go out in the front yard
02:30:23.060 and look to see if
02:30:23.960 anything hit the window
02:30:24.680 and fell and there's just
02:30:26.800 nothing there and i'm in
02:30:28.480 this mode where like i'm
02:30:30.420 power washing my house i'm
02:30:32.020 edging the grass like this
02:30:33.980 house is mint like if
02:30:36.360 something's on that front
02:30:37.140 porch because it hit the
02:30:37.840 window i'm gonna see it
02:30:38.640 i got two chairs with a
02:30:40.120 little table in between
02:30:41.000 that i would sit on the
02:30:41.800 front i'd have a cigar and
02:30:42.760 i'd have a drink and i'd
02:30:43.500 watch the sunset this thing
02:30:45.840 is clean nothing's there
02:30:49.100 happens again at a
02:30:52.160 different window i go and
02:30:53.380 investigate what the hell's
02:30:54.360 going on my niece starts
02:30:57.060 telling me that at night
02:30:59.000 she sees like a really
02:31:02.020 tall man standing in her
02:31:03.800 window she had a weird
02:31:04.620 room with a floor to
02:31:05.500 ceiling window in it a
02:31:07.260 floor to ceiling window in
02:31:08.720 it that's how tall the dude
02:31:10.360 was 1.00
02:31:11.020 nephilim shit 0.99
02:31:14.280 it's happening when i'm in 0.99
02:31:17.840 my room there's a window
02:31:19.140 behind my headboard
02:31:20.180 something's tapping on it
02:31:21.920 every window in the house
02:31:24.640 every door in the house
02:31:25.920 something's tapping on it
02:31:27.680 the garage door sounds
02:31:29.560 distinctly different than
02:31:30.520 tapping on a window
02:31:31.320 something's tapping on that
02:31:33.420 it starts to pick up to the
02:31:35.800 point where like there's no
02:31:37.020 tree there can't be a tree
02:31:38.000 like in front of your
02:31:38.740 garage there's a tree off to
02:31:40.120 the left side of my house it
02:31:41.320 doesn't account for all the
02:31:42.980 windows around that you know
02:31:44.180 what i mean right right it
02:31:45.220 just doesn't make sense and
02:31:46.180 and it was by my bedroom so i
02:31:49.920 like chalked up that one to
02:31:51.480 just that's the tree but
02:31:53.820 what about all the other
02:31:54.440 ones what about all the
02:31:55.700 other ways that the tree
02:31:56.520 doesn't reach what is this
02:31:57.700 yeah and it eventually
02:32:02.020 evolves into like knocks
02:32:03.740 like the door doesn't just
02:32:07.040 get tapped it gets knocked
02:32:08.660 do do like something hits it 0.99
02:32:11.260 twice do do the fuck and 1.00
02:32:15.000 these nights man these nights 0.99
02:32:17.960 get so weird
02:32:20.060 i would wake up startled and
02:32:25.120 i'd look around my bedroom
02:32:26.360 and i see a black mass and
02:32:29.560 the room feels electric the
02:32:32.320 room feels like static
02:32:33.520 electricity and it feels evil
02:32:37.280 now i had already prayed to
02:32:41.660 jesus once before so by this
02:32:43.460 time that seal's already
02:32:45.240 cracked and i'm ready to do
02:32:46.460 this thing so i start thinking
02:32:47.600 to myself well maybe it's
02:32:49.380 because
02:32:49.940 i i had this understanding i
02:32:54.000 was listening to tony the
02:32:55.200 confessionals right which is
02:32:57.140 something that i started doing
02:32:58.380 after my experience after my
02:33:00.820 experience back in that old
02:33:01.900 house where i saw that thing
02:33:02.920 and my wife saw it and my son
02:33:03.960 saw it i started to seek out
02:33:05.360 podcasts stories anything that
02:33:07.700 was like somebody's having the
02:33:08.940 same experience and i found the
02:33:10.800 confessionals and through the
02:33:12.840 confessionals i was already
02:33:13.820 learning that there is a legal
02:33:15.160 aspect to the spiritual realm
02:33:17.720 and that we have a
02:33:19.320 authority in the name of
02:33:20.420 christ and that's why it
02:33:21.220 worked
02:33:21.500 and so i started to claim
02:33:24.380 my house
02:33:26.000 whoever lived here before
02:33:28.600 doesn't live here i'm the
02:33:29.400 legal owner
02:33:30.220 i started thinking about it
02:33:31.840 because i was like the jews in 0.90
02:33:32.560 the bank owned my house but
02:33:33.580 i'm the legal owner
02:33:34.980 of this property
02:33:36.720 whatever
02:33:38.060 deals you had that gave you
02:33:40.340 access to this place you don't
02:33:41.300 have those deals anymore
02:33:42.220 in the name of jesus christ you
02:33:43.600 have to leave this place and
02:33:45.940 what was happening was it
02:33:47.380 would stop
02:33:48.040 the events that night
02:33:49.840 it would stop the feeling in
02:33:52.660 the room that night
02:33:53.500 it would stop the taps on the
02:33:55.420 door that night but the next
02:33:56.600 day it would be back on
02:33:57.600 and i remember one time
02:33:59.780 it got so bad
02:34:01.120 mind you like i'm waking up in
02:34:03.180 the morning
02:34:03.520 and my wife is going like 1.00
02:34:05.440 the room felt really weird last
02:34:08.200 night and i'm going yeah dude
02:34:09.640 you felt that it was
02:34:11.160 terrifying
02:34:12.320 like this is just the norm now
02:34:15.520 we're we're in this so much
02:34:17.880 it's all happening so much like
02:34:19.320 this is just the norm and we're
02:34:20.640 like kind of
02:34:21.460 talking about it like it's it's
02:34:23.940 hard to ignore
02:34:24.820 gabe is funny he's like uh my
02:34:28.140 cousin is just like
02:34:29.000 kind of in like not in denial
02:34:31.320 irreverent
02:34:32.620 yeah
02:34:34.040 yeah yeah that happened uh but
02:34:36.320 whatever i'm like all right dude
02:34:38.940 so one day me and gabe are
02:34:41.680 standing by the front door and
02:34:42.940 we're having a chat he's sitting
02:34:44.000 on the love seat i'm standing up
02:34:45.380 and all of a sudden
02:34:47.300 boom boom something bangs on the
02:34:49.420 door
02:34:49.620 and we're right there
02:34:51.060 i reach out i grab the door
02:34:53.620 it's like that scene in the movie
02:34:55.740 signs
02:34:56.240 where mel gibson and joaquin phoenix
02:34:58.180 run outside
02:34:58.840 and they both go in opposite
02:35:00.740 directions around the house and 1.00
02:35:01.760 they're screaming fuck you and all 1.00
02:35:02.820 this stuff 1.00
02:35:03.100 we don't scream anything but we
02:35:04.680 burst through the door he goes
02:35:05.820 right i go left
02:35:06.680 i'm looking around there's
02:35:08.020 nothing there i see
02:35:09.080 a small
02:35:11.240 skittering
02:35:12.740 black
02:35:13.840 cloud
02:35:15.340 on my front lawn very close like
02:35:17.600 like if i looked at the floor
02:35:18.540 right there
02:35:18.920 and it's just moving away
02:35:20.140 but it's so
02:35:21.660 it does it's
02:35:24.860 i can see the grass through it
02:35:26.560 it's
02:35:28.580 dusk
02:35:29.360 i can see the grass through it 1.00
02:35:31.460 fuck i forgot how this all 0.99
02:35:33.020 started 0.99
02:35:33.440 i'll go back to that later
02:35:34.820 and
02:35:36.340 it's it's like it
02:35:38.520 there's nothing to look at
02:35:40.120 it's a black mask but i can see
02:35:41.660 through it so like i kind of
02:35:42.840 never mind it and i look away
02:35:44.080 and then
02:35:45.040 i turn to gabe
02:35:47.100 and gabe
02:35:47.880 goes like there's nothing here
02:35:50.100 and then he goes
02:35:50.700 look
02:35:51.300 and he points off in the direction
02:35:53.300 kind of similar to where that
02:35:54.300 thing was going
02:35:54.880 and under a street lamp
02:35:56.260 a block away
02:35:57.500 there's just a shadow of a man
02:35:59.100 standing there
02:35:59.660 under a street lamp
02:36:02.040 there's a shadow of a man
02:36:03.100 how to how does that even work
02:36:07.440 under a street lamp
02:36:08.420 it would be a man
02:36:09.220 yeah yeah
02:36:10.280 but it's a shadow
02:36:11.220 it's a shadow of a man
02:36:12.400 and
02:36:13.320 and we just go back inside
02:36:15.560 and then it's just another
02:36:16.900 it's irreverent right
02:36:17.800 it's another thing
02:36:18.320 where it doesn't matter
02:36:18.780 the way this started
02:36:20.680 it all kicked off with an event
02:36:22.560 i forgot about it
02:36:23.760 um i got a puppy
02:36:25.760 because my niece went trick-or-treating 1.00
02:36:27.700 on halloween 1.00
02:36:28.380 fucking dude gave out puppies 0.99
02:36:29.740 i remember 0.99
02:36:30.580 i was yeah
02:36:31.900 i was in your life at this point
02:36:33.340 yeah dude
02:36:33.900 you're like i got a puppy
02:36:34.860 i was like 1.00
02:36:35.260 sucks 0.92
02:36:36.100 wrong 0.97
02:36:36.520 yeah
02:36:36.840 dude is just trick-or-treating
02:36:39.040 he's just giving out puppies
02:36:40.080 so we got this adorable little puppy
02:36:41.520 i'm trying to do the thing
02:36:43.260 where i walk the puppy
02:36:44.200 it's it's dusk
02:36:45.040 it's like 7 30
02:36:45.820 it's getting kind of dark out
02:36:47.020 and um
02:36:48.260 and i walk only a block away
02:36:49.660 from my house
02:36:50.340 and
02:36:51.300 all of a sudden
02:36:52.420 my neighbors start fighting
02:36:53.520 i can hear them
02:36:54.660 they're screaming at each other
02:36:55.360 i don't know these people at all
02:36:56.200 i've only lived there
02:36:56.740 for a little bit
02:36:57.320 and
02:36:58.140 they're screaming
02:36:59.740 husband and wife at each other
02:37:01.220 it's like
02:37:01.720 it's brutal
02:37:02.440 the things they're saying
02:37:03.620 and how loud it is
02:37:04.500 it's echoing through the silent streets
02:37:05.920 of this little like suburb area
02:37:07.480 and
02:37:08.340 uh
02:37:09.820 the dog gets scared
02:37:10.800 and it basically hunkers down
02:37:12.060 i'm waiting for it to pee
02:37:12.940 but it just like sits down
02:37:14.380 and i'm like
02:37:14.740 let's go
02:37:15.160 let's go
02:37:15.740 and and
02:37:16.220 it's too scared to move
02:37:17.380 all of a sudden
02:37:18.520 the couple
02:37:19.580 comes out
02:37:20.460 i i kind of pieced together
02:37:21.580 what had happened was
02:37:22.380 it almost seemed like
02:37:23.360 she forgot her phone at a store
02:37:24.960 and he was pissed
02:37:26.860 and they were both
02:37:27.380 you know
02:37:27.720 so they get in the car
02:37:29.420 and they go
02:37:30.900 i guess to retrace their steps
02:37:32.020 to go find this phone
02:37:33.060 or something
02:37:33.520 and um
02:37:34.880 and i look away from them
02:37:36.260 to act like i didn't see them
02:37:37.780 and when i look back
02:37:39.420 i realize like
02:37:39.860 oh they left everything on
02:37:40.940 they left all their lights
02:37:41.960 on the tv's on
02:37:42.840 the front door
02:37:43.380 is only the glass panel
02:37:44.800 uh
02:37:45.640 the garage door
02:37:46.680 is wide open
02:37:47.420 the lights are still on
02:37:48.960 and i'm like 0.99
02:37:49.680 damn 0.98
02:37:49.860 they really left in a hurry 0.99
02:37:50.800 so
02:37:51.520 the puppy's continuing
02:37:54.260 to do its thing
02:37:54.940 and i see
02:37:55.640 a family approaching
02:37:58.060 it's a dude
02:37:58.660 with a stroller
02:37:59.340 there's a wife
02:38:00.220 there's like a
02:38:00.880 little daughter maybe
02:38:02.040 and i'm like
02:38:03.260 having this moment
02:38:03.900 where
02:38:04.220 i am
02:38:05.600 the homeowner now
02:38:06.900 right
02:38:07.160 i used to be a homeless 1.00
02:38:08.500 piece of shit 0.99
02:38:09.120 now i'm a dude 1.00
02:38:10.600 with a pool
02:38:11.400 and a puppy
02:38:12.780 so
02:38:13.780 i'm looking forward
02:38:15.020 to this like
02:38:15.580 howdy neighbor moment 1.00
02:38:16.640 as stupid as that sounds 1.00
02:38:17.920 dude 1.00
02:38:18.100 it was just like
02:38:18.680 this picturesque moment
02:38:19.660 that i was really
02:38:20.240 looking forward to
02:38:20.860 so as they're coming
02:38:22.000 i'm anticipating
02:38:22.700 like the kids
02:38:23.440 gonna want to see
02:38:23.960 the puppy
02:38:24.400 and this is gonna be
02:38:25.440 such a nice
02:38:25.960 and wholesome interaction
02:38:27.000 i'm in wholesome mode
02:38:28.560 you know 1.00
02:38:28.940 wash your butthole 0.99
02:38:29.780 69 69 1.00
02:38:30.780 oh boy
02:38:31.480 that's a story
02:38:32.140 so
02:38:33.000 so
02:38:33.360 you know
02:38:35.360 nephilim dead squad
02:38:36.600 doesn't know that
02:38:37.400 that's a crazy story
02:38:38.740 that's a you gotta go back
02:38:39.620 to the tower gang
02:38:40.300 that won't be in the book
02:38:41.380 no that's not gonna be
02:38:42.120 in the book
02:38:42.400 so
02:38:43.180 so
02:38:43.720 um
02:38:45.300 eventually they approach
02:38:47.160 close enough
02:38:47.780 and and and
02:38:48.500 you know
02:38:48.960 like like clockwork
02:38:50.140 the little girl goes
02:38:51.000 oh my god
02:38:51.740 a puppy
02:38:52.240 and the and the husband
02:38:53.340 goes how old is she
02:38:54.480 and i go oh
02:38:55.040 she's only this old 0.92
02:38:56.020 and and you know
02:38:57.040 we're just having like
02:38:57.640 this nice exchange
02:38:58.420 i was so looking forward to
02:38:59.880 and suddenly
02:39:01.540 in in my peripheral vision
02:39:04.220 i see
02:39:04.860 somebody standing
02:39:06.360 in that garage
02:39:07.220 the shadow of a man
02:39:08.980 standing in that garage
02:39:10.360 and
02:39:11.740 he starts beelining
02:39:13.920 like speed walking
02:39:15.020 down the driveway
02:39:16.420 towards me
02:39:17.040 and this is such
02:39:18.980 a real moment
02:39:20.140 that you know
02:39:22.060 you start doing like
02:39:22.880 what's happening
02:39:23.660 and i go
02:39:24.480 oh my god
02:39:25.140 this guy's coming
02:39:25.800 to apologize
02:39:26.340 for what i heard
02:39:27.140 it must have just
02:39:28.080 been his wife
02:39:28.580 that left or something
02:39:29.420 in the car
02:39:30.300 and this guy's gonna
02:39:31.280 come up to me
02:39:31.720 and he's gonna go
02:39:32.320 hey man
02:39:33.380 sorry you heard that
02:39:35.160 i know you're standing
02:39:35.780 right across the street
02:39:36.500 like i know you just
02:39:37.920 moved in
02:39:38.440 like that's just
02:39:39.100 in my mind
02:39:39.740 as i'm talking to people
02:39:40.460 this is like the
02:39:41.020 background noise
02:39:41.700 that's happening
02:39:42.160 i'm mortified by this
02:39:43.700 i don't want this
02:39:44.540 to happen
02:39:44.980 so i start to turn
02:39:47.820 my body away from him
02:39:49.200 and he's boogieing
02:39:51.320 right so i say my
02:39:53.180 goodbyes to these people
02:39:54.200 and i anticipate based
02:39:55.480 off of the speed that
02:39:56.260 he was approaching me 1.00
02:39:56.960 this motherfucker is 1.00
02:39:57.900 like right here 1.00
02:39:58.600 and he's not saying
02:40:00.120 anything
02:40:00.420 so i go
02:40:01.660 i guess i'm gonna have
02:40:03.700 to be the one who
02:40:04.260 like initiates this
02:40:05.280 conversation with this
02:40:05.980 really awkward guy
02:40:06.680 i turn
02:40:07.520 he's not there
02:40:08.780 when i tell you i was
02:40:10.320 so certain
02:40:11.720 that he was there
02:40:13.360 that i was feeling
02:40:14.500 embarrassment
02:40:15.860 secondhand embarrassment
02:40:16.780 for him
02:40:17.220 that's how certain
02:40:18.780 it wasn't like
02:40:19.400 a mystery
02:40:20.220 it wasn't like
02:40:20.720 is this guy here
02:40:21.700 it's like this 1.00
02:40:22.620 fucking dude 1.00
02:40:23.440 does not have to 1.00
02:40:25.120 do this to me
02:40:25.760 he does not have
02:40:26.380 to apologize
02:40:26.880 i was i was going
02:40:28.100 to love him
02:40:28.820 so you didn't see it
02:40:30.360 that's what i was
02:40:31.020 gonna do
02:40:31.420 i was gonna turn 1.00
02:40:32.660 to him like a loser 0.99
02:40:33.720 and say 1.00
02:40:34.260 what no
02:40:35.680 i didn't hear anything
02:40:37.120 really what i should
02:40:38.080 have just said is like
02:40:38.700 hey man it's all right
02:40:39.520 everybody has their
02:40:40.160 moments
02:40:40.380 everybody beats their
02:40:41.060 wife
02:40:41.260 but i was ready
02:40:42.060 to lie to him
02:40:42.960 that's how certain
02:40:44.400 i was that this dude
02:40:45.220 was there
02:40:45.620 he wasn't there
02:40:46.560 i picked the puppy
02:40:48.000 up because he's
02:40:48.660 little little
02:40:49.180 i walk back to the
02:40:50.400 house and i get in
02:40:52.100 and i say man
02:40:52.760 neighbors were arguing
02:40:53.880 they go what
02:40:54.580 it's like my niece
02:40:55.140 and my wife
02:40:55.520 they want to know
02:40:56.100 and then they go
02:40:57.140 so what happens next
02:40:58.000 and i go yeah
02:40:58.420 then this dude
02:40:59.100 i turn around
02:40:59.920 he's not there
02:41:00.480 and they go 0.98
02:41:01.660 that's fucking creepy 0.99
02:41:03.080 and i hadn't even 0.99
02:41:05.160 thought about it
02:41:05.740 through that
02:41:06.000 i don't know
02:41:06.400 what i thought
02:41:07.020 happened to him
02:41:08.000 but i went
02:41:08.900 yeah you're right
02:41:10.400 that is creepy
02:41:11.080 that was the night
02:41:13.000 everything started
02:41:14.220 and and the way
02:41:17.200 that i look at it
02:41:17.960 was like something
02:41:18.840 was in their house
02:41:21.180 and they were
02:41:23.180 fighting
02:41:25.420 screaming 0.51
02:41:26.440 and then this thing
02:41:28.660 saw me
02:41:29.360 and it
02:41:30.540 did something
02:41:31.940 it hitchhiked
02:41:33.640 onto me
02:41:34.380 it left their house
02:41:36.000 and it hitchhiked
02:41:36.700 onto me
02:41:37.200 and eventually
02:41:39.320 through enough
02:41:39.820 repetition
02:41:40.360 of like
02:41:41.020 in the name
02:41:42.060 of jesus christ
02:41:42.700 you have no
02:41:43.100 authority here
02:41:43.660 you can't be here
02:41:44.680 this is my home
02:41:46.000 i'm the owner
02:41:46.860 it took a lot
02:41:49.140 but eventually
02:41:49.860 it all
02:41:50.440 died down
02:41:51.520 and then we went
02:41:54.500 to new orleans
02:41:55.940 and we had that
02:41:58.460 that moment
02:41:59.700 you know
02:42:01.160 probably around
02:42:02.000 the same time
02:42:02.820 where 1.00
02:42:03.960 like an idiot 1.00
02:42:05.380 i went 1.00
02:42:05.720 and i
02:42:06.260 and i
02:42:06.280 and i
02:42:06.600 did some
02:42:07.140 tarot card
02:42:07.620 readings
02:42:07.900 i got
02:42:08.240 something 0.99
02:42:08.600 fucking 1.00
02:42:08.880 attached to 1.00
02:42:09.320 me
02:42:09.440 and that
02:42:09.700 night
02:42:10.000 on the third
02:42:11.100 floor
02:42:11.440 of a hotel
02:42:12.600 in new orleans
02:42:13.420 with no balcony
02:42:14.180 something's pounding
02:42:15.360 on my glass window
02:42:16.340 and i look around
02:42:20.540 and there's nothing
02:42:21.080 at the window
02:42:21.540 and i go back
02:42:22.100 to sleep
02:42:22.540 and then it's
02:42:23.740 pounding at my
02:42:24.420 door
02:42:24.720 and both me
02:42:25.600 and my wife
02:42:26.240 sit up
02:42:26.700 and when i go
02:42:27.920 to invest
02:42:28.320 the stroke
02:42:29.820 of midnight
02:42:30.360 and i think
02:42:34.940 that
02:42:35.320 i don't know
02:42:36.940 it was almost
02:42:37.940 like
02:42:38.380 leading up
02:42:40.640 to
02:42:41.000 a very important
02:42:42.200 decision
02:42:42.700 all these things
02:42:43.920 were like
02:42:44.260 trying to close
02:42:44.960 in on me
02:42:45.460 and that decision
02:42:47.400 was like
02:42:47.840 in that hotel
02:42:49.160 that very same
02:42:49.880 hotel
02:42:50.320 i got a call
02:42:52.280 from you
02:42:52.760 and we had
02:42:54.980 done a few
02:42:55.400 episodes together
02:42:56.220 and you decided
02:42:58.180 like yo
02:42:58.700 do you want
02:42:59.540 to try to
02:43:00.000 make a show
02:43:00.760 and standing
02:43:02.760 in the middle
02:43:03.140 of that living
02:43:03.600 room dude 1.00
02:43:03.940 it's fucking 0.99
02:43:04.460 crazy 0.99
02:43:05.020 standing in the
02:43:06.560 middle of that
02:43:06.920 living room
02:43:07.420 i had this
02:43:08.900 conversation with
02:43:09.720 you and i go
02:43:10.520 yeah man 0.99
02:43:11.100 and when i hang
02:43:12.220 up i tell my
02:43:13.880 wife i think
02:43:15.400 this is it
02:43:15.980 and you know
02:43:16.680 what i was 0.97
02:43:17.600 fucking right 0.92
02:43:20.320 two and a half 0.97
02:43:21.320 years ago
02:43:21.760 standing in a 0.99
02:43:22.680 fucking haunted 1.00
02:43:23.340 hotel in new 1.00
02:43:24.140 orleans
02:43:24.520 i hang up 0.55
02:43:26.000 with you
02:43:26.520 and i look
02:43:26.980 my wife in
02:43:27.460 the eye
02:43:27.700 and i go
02:43:28.100 i think
02:43:29.460 this is the
02:43:30.020 show
02:43:30.280 i had been
02:43:31.780 podcasting
02:43:32.520 on and off
02:43:33.200 for seven
02:43:33.620 years
02:43:33.960 or whatever
02:43:34.560 six years
02:43:35.040 or something
02:43:35.300 by that
02:43:35.620 point
02:43:35.880 because i
02:43:36.880 guess now
02:43:37.180 it's eight
02:43:37.600 or yeah
02:43:38.280 and um
02:43:39.640 i had done
02:43:41.820 five six
02:43:44.180 different shows
02:43:45.040 with different
02:43:46.000 titles
02:43:46.380 and i said
02:43:47.960 i think this
02:43:48.860 is it
02:43:49.320 and that
02:43:50.620 was based
02:43:51.000 entirely off
02:43:51.740 of just
02:43:52.140 something in
02:43:53.060 my spirit
02:43:53.480 just moving
02:43:54.020 me and
02:43:54.340 saying this
02:43:54.680 is it
02:43:55.020 you know
02:43:58.300 life gets
02:44:00.020 real weird
02:44:00.560 after that
02:44:01.380 but i think
02:44:02.640 that since
02:44:04.600 then i can
02:44:06.380 almost confidently
02:44:07.140 say it's
02:44:09.520 stopped i've
02:44:09.980 had dreams
02:44:10.620 i've had weird
02:44:11.540 moments but
02:44:12.660 nothing like
02:44:13.140 that that was
02:44:14.280 like a
02:44:15.060 convergence of
02:44:16.800 things it was
02:44:17.860 it was like
02:44:18.780 it was like
02:44:20.620 i had a
02:44:21.260 a light
02:44:22.720 on
02:44:23.020 and all
02:44:25.520 these spirits
02:44:26.380 were just
02:44:26.880 moving on
02:44:27.620 i mean my
02:44:29.360 house was
02:44:29.980 surrounded
02:44:30.400 is what it
02:44:31.420 felt like
02:44:31.860 that was the
02:44:32.800 impression
02:44:33.340 banging on
02:44:34.980 all windows
02:44:35.620 and all
02:44:36.040 doors all
02:44:36.720 around the
02:44:37.100 house
02:44:37.420 and
02:44:39.500 and then
02:44:41.140 this you
02:44:41.820 know this
02:44:42.140 bizarre moment
02:44:44.200 you know
02:44:45.580 because when
02:44:46.120 she heard
02:44:46.900 it too
02:44:47.220 it's like
02:44:47.640 no like
02:44:48.520 i went to
02:44:49.900 that people
02:44:51.220 on that
02:44:51.620 door and
02:44:51.940 i looked
02:44:52.200 out there's
02:44:52.480 nothing out
02:44:53.040 there pounding
02:44:54.400 at my door
02:44:55.000 wakes us both
02:44:55.620 up there's
02:44:55.980 nothing out
02:44:56.620 there which
02:44:57.460 you could say
02:44:57.820 hey that's
02:44:58.160 just some 1.00
02:44:58.440 asshole in 1.00
02:44:59.300 the hotel
02:44:59.680 at night
02:45:00.080 what preceded
02:45:01.460 it pounding
02:45:02.000 on my third
02:45:02.980 floor glass
02:45:03.960 panel with
02:45:04.600 no balcony
02:45:05.280 at the stroke
02:45:08.140 of midnight
02:45:08.660 was this before
02:45:10.380 or i know
02:45:11.160 you did a
02:45:11.800 a tower
02:45:12.800 reading it
02:45:13.560 was after
02:45:13.900 that
02:45:14.200 so it
02:45:15.300 was the
02:45:15.520 same night
02:45:15.920 you did
02:45:16.380 the tower
02:45:16.720 reading
02:45:17.060 went to
02:45:17.840 bed
02:45:18.080 or and
02:45:19.520 and then
02:45:19.880 pretty much
02:45:20.220 yeah
02:45:20.500 takes place
02:45:21.300 tower
02:45:21.980 reading
02:45:22.320 goes
02:45:22.720 you're doing
02:45:25.380 something right
02:45:25.940 now you got
02:45:26.300 your foot in
02:45:26.720 two worlds
02:45:27.320 one of them
02:45:27.840 you're doing
02:45:28.120 for money
02:45:28.500 one of them
02:45:28.860 you're doing
02:45:29.140 for passion
02:45:29.680 that passion
02:45:31.600 thing
02:45:31.960 you're gonna
02:45:33.600 go all in
02:45:34.140 on that
02:45:34.460 it's gonna
02:45:34.820 be it's gonna
02:45:35.760 be big
02:45:36.100 you're gonna
02:45:36.740 travel a lot
02:45:37.500 because of it
02:45:38.160 this is what
02:45:38.720 you're supposed
02:45:39.040 to be doing
02:45:39.540 told me
02:45:41.020 be careful
02:45:42.860 a lot
02:45:46.080 of people
02:45:46.380 are gonna
02:45:46.620 hate you 0.93
02:45:47.200 you're a
02:45:48.880 good man
02:45:49.420 don't let
02:45:52.200 it make
02:45:52.640 you a 0.57
02:45:52.880 bad one
02:45:53.380 since I've
02:45:58.140 I've
02:45:58.420 obviously
02:45:58.860 repented
02:45:59.300 I didn't
02:45:59.640 have the
02:45:59.900 context
02:46:00.280 I didn't
02:46:00.660 know what
02:46:01.080 I was
02:46:01.320 doing
02:46:01.720 I had
02:46:02.640 my feelings
02:46:03.300 though
02:46:03.540 it wasn't
02:46:03.960 like it
02:46:04.160 was a
02:46:04.340 totally
02:46:04.580 uneducated
02:46:05.140 decision
02:46:05.480 like I
02:46:05.800 was kind 0.99
02:46:06.120 of fucking 0.99
02:46:06.420 you know 1.00
02:46:06.620 listening to
02:46:07.100 Tony Merkel 1.00
02:46:07.600 and shit 1.00
02:46:07.880 like I 0.98
02:46:08.140 kind of
02:46:08.400 had
02:46:08.680 my
02:46:09.520 suspicions
02:46:10.240 the temptation
02:46:12.280 is strong
02:46:12.780 especially if
02:46:13.320 you don't
02:46:13.560 understand the
02:46:14.200 actual
02:46:14.720 ramifications
02:46:15.520 yeah
02:46:16.220 of what
02:46:16.840 you're
02:46:17.080 what you
02:46:17.540 were dealing
02:46:18.000 with
02:46:18.340 I think
02:46:18.800 oh yeah
02:46:19.260 that's definitely
02:46:19.780 my wife
02:46:20.300 brat 0.97
02:46:21.000 wife says 0.97
02:46:21.620 don't forget
02:46:23.740 when the
02:46:24.020 house was
02:46:24.780 covered in
02:46:25.620 flies for
02:46:26.660 no reason
02:46:27.260 I mean
02:46:28.360 dude
02:46:28.940 my garage
02:46:30.680 and the
02:46:31.540 rest of
02:46:31.860 my house
02:46:32.400 was filled
02:46:34.080 with big 1.00
02:46:36.280 fat black 0.99
02:46:37.640 flies
02:46:38.140 they were so 0.98
02:46:39.800 fucking big 0.98
02:46:40.460 they were like 0.99
02:46:40.880 clunky they 0.99
02:46:41.320 could barely
02:46:41.660 fly and
02:46:43.300 that house
02:46:44.220 was clean
02:46:44.640 and it
02:46:46.220 seemed to be
02:46:46.580 coming from
02:46:46.940 my garage
02:46:47.560 my garage
02:46:48.600 was you
02:46:50.520 know my
02:46:50.740 heavy bag
02:46:51.180 was out
02:46:51.580 there
02:46:51.900 and our
02:46:53.000 washer and
02:46:53.700 dryer was
02:46:54.160 out there
02:46:54.640 and I
02:46:55.620 regularly
02:46:56.180 and my
02:46:57.520 wife can 1.00
02:46:57.820 attest to
02:46:58.220 this
02:46:58.420 would take
02:46:59.060 everything
02:46:59.560 out of
02:46:59.960 the garage
02:47:00.520 I would
02:47:01.540 sweep it
02:47:02.000 all out
02:47:02.480 I'd take
02:47:03.200 the leaf
02:47:03.660 blower
02:47:03.960 blow 0.77
02:47:04.300 everything
02:47:04.900 out of
02:47:05.180 that garage
02:47:05.620 every cobweb
02:47:06.380 and everything
02:47:06.800 this was not
02:47:08.500 a dirty
02:47:08.860 garage
02:47:09.340 this was
02:47:09.840 like a
02:47:10.060 hangout
02:47:10.420 spot
02:47:10.740 and these
02:47:12.860 flies were
02:47:13.540 just
02:47:14.000 every time
02:47:15.600 I clean
02:47:16.060 they would
02:47:16.440 just come
02:47:16.800 back
02:47:17.180 and I
02:47:18.160 would see
02:47:18.420 their larva
02:47:19.040 all over
02:47:20.220 the floor
02:47:20.780 like these
02:47:21.500 black shells
02:47:22.420 that they
02:47:23.400 were in
02:47:23.860 from the
02:47:24.900 larva stage
02:47:25.640 and they
02:47:25.820 would go
02:47:26.060 into like
02:47:26.400 a little
02:47:27.020 cocoon
02:47:27.440 and then
02:47:27.720 they would
02:47:27.960 become
02:47:28.220 these
02:47:28.420 things
02:47:28.680 I
02:47:30.280 couldn't
02:47:30.460 get rid
02:47:30.740 of them
02:47:30.960 and I
02:47:31.840 never even
02:47:32.280 drew the
02:47:32.580 correlation
02:47:32.980 I was so 1.00
02:47:33.460 stupid 1.00
02:47:33.800 I was going 1.00
02:47:35.180 out there
02:47:35.580 like it
02:47:35.840 was a
02:47:36.080 game
02:47:36.540 I was
02:47:37.160 snatching
02:47:37.560 them out
02:47:37.820 of the
02:47:38.020 sky
02:47:38.300 and like
02:47:38.620 whipping 0.95
02:47:38.940 them
02:47:39.080 against
02:47:39.320 the
02:47:39.480 ground
02:47:39.800 there
02:47:40.440 were
02:47:40.580 times
02:47:40.980 where
02:47:41.180 I'm
02:47:41.380 manically
02:47:41.760 in there
02:47:42.360 catching
02:47:43.100 hundreds
02:47:43.800 of flies
02:47:44.440 by hand
02:47:45.120 and throwing
02:47:46.440 them against
02:47:46.920 the ground 1.00
02:47:47.300 to kill 1.00
02:47:47.620 them 1.00
02:47:47.840 and it
02:47:49.660 was until
02:47:50.000 years later
02:47:50.640 when I
02:47:50.880 was like
02:47:51.160 every single
02:47:52.720 horror movie
02:47:53.460 ever 0.83
02:47:53.880 has black
02:47:55.920 flies when
02:47:56.680 there's a
02:47:57.020 supernatural
02:47:57.540 haunting thing
02:47:58.700 and I never
02:47:59.920 put it
02:48:00.240 together
02:48:00.600 yeah it's
02:48:01.220 like when
02:48:01.440 it's happening
02:48:01.840 to you
02:48:02.280 right
02:48:03.020 I don't
02:48:03.940 know
02:48:04.260 I don't
02:48:04.880 know
02:48:05.180 but man
02:48:07.020 that moment
02:48:10.360 that we
02:48:12.100 decide in
02:48:12.980 that in
02:48:13.440 that hotel
02:48:13.940 like this
02:48:14.420 is what
02:48:14.660 we're going
02:48:14.860 to do
02:48:15.040 we're going
02:48:15.240 to do
02:48:15.380 this show
02:48:15.900 I don't
02:48:16.620 even think
02:48:16.820 we named
02:48:17.240 it yet
02:48:17.520 I had
02:48:17.820 some names
02:48:18.220 kicking
02:48:18.440 around
02:48:18.640 Nephilim
02:48:18.980 Death
02:48:19.260 Squad
02:48:19.480 used to
02:48:19.840 be a
02:48:20.160 Twitter
02:48:20.520 group
02:48:20.840 that I
02:48:21.100 put
02:48:21.260 together
02:48:21.580 with
02:48:21.800 some
02:48:22.080 characters
02:48:22.920 like
02:48:23.500 the guys
02:48:24.680 from the
02:48:25.080 phone booth
02:48:25.540 podcast
02:48:26.460 Escanor
02:48:27.300 you
02:48:27.780 I think
02:48:28.260 Paul
02:48:28.560 Stobbs
02:48:29.040 was in
02:48:29.400 it
02:48:29.640 and I
02:48:30.120 didn't
02:48:30.260 know
02:48:30.440 what
02:48:30.820 I
02:48:31.140 just
02:48:31.520 had
02:48:31.740 this
02:48:31.940 name
02:48:32.480 and
02:48:32.760 this
02:48:32.960 thing
02:48:33.280 it has
02:48:33.560 to be
02:48:33.800 a
02:48:33.940 thing
02:48:37.020 to do
02:48:37.340 with
02:48:37.540 it
02:48:37.740 and
02:48:38.520 then
02:48:38.660 once
02:48:38.920 that
02:48:39.100 happened
02:48:39.520 I
02:48:40.560 just
02:48:40.740 took
02:48:40.920 that
02:48:41.100 right
02:48:41.320 off
02:48:41.500 that
02:48:41.700 group
02:48:42.100 which
02:48:42.500 wasn't
02:48:42.740 doing
02:48:42.880 anything
02:48:43.360 any
02:48:43.660 way
02:48:43.840 and I
02:48:44.020 was
02:48:44.120 like
02:48:44.380 Nephilim
02:48:45.160 Death
02:48:45.360 Squad
02:48:45.540 that's
02:48:45.880 it
02:48:46.040 and
02:48:46.820 all
02:48:47.580 this
02:48:47.780 show
02:48:47.980 is
02:48:48.140 done
02:48:48.500 is
02:48:49.440 like
02:48:49.800 it's
02:48:51.640 almost
02:48:51.840 like
02:48:52.100 God
02:48:52.460 let me
02:48:53.100 chase
02:48:53.440 these
02:48:53.680 mysteries
02:48:54.060 for so
02:48:54.660 long
02:48:55.020 dude
02:48:55.320 and
02:48:56.960 and
02:48:58.660 then
02:48:58.780 finally
02:48:59.260 once I
02:48:59.960 decided
02:49:00.800 to
02:49:01.040 include
02:49:01.580 him
02:49:01.980 it
02:49:04.260 was
02:49:04.400 like
02:49:04.680 I
02:49:05.480 got the
02:49:05.940 answers
02:49:06.260 on his
02:49:06.640 time
02:49:06.960 but
02:49:08.100 it
02:49:08.160 was
02:49:08.260 like
02:49:08.400 those
02:49:08.580 answers
02:49:08.940 were
02:49:09.120 all
02:49:09.280 the
02:49:09.420 right
02:49:09.600 answers
02:49:10.020 I
02:49:11.200 think
02:49:11.620 that
02:49:11.780 all
02:49:11.920 we
02:49:12.060 were
02:49:12.200 dealing
02:49:12.480 with
02:49:12.700 in my
02:49:12.980 in my
02:49:13.300 household
02:49:13.660 and my
02:49:13.960 family
02:49:14.360 was
02:49:15.400 generational
02:49:15.960 iniquity
02:49:16.420 I think 0.91
02:49:16.640 my wife
02:49:17.020 suffered
02:49:17.280 the same
02:49:17.680 thing
02:49:17.960 her
02:49:18.340 grandmother's
02:49:19.280 into
02:49:19.440 witchcraft
02:49:19.960 and everything
02:49:20.360 and
02:49:20.680 and she's
02:49:21.560 gone down
02:49:21.900 this same
02:49:22.520 path
02:49:22.760 that I
02:49:23.020 have
02:49:23.160 I
02:49:23.240 think
02:49:23.340 a lot
02:49:23.680 of
02:49:23.800 us
02:49:24.040 a lot
02:49:24.440 of
02:49:24.560 people
02:49:24.740 people
02:49:24.940 listening
02:49:25.200 to
02:49:25.360 this
02:49:25.520 show
02:49:25.860 all
02:49:26.720 have
02:49:27.100 this
02:49:27.360 thing
02:49:27.900 Dave
02:49:30.380 Raven
02:49:30.740 would die 0.52
02:49:31.580 in a
02:49:31.840 horror
02:49:32.080 movie
02:49:32.400 I
02:49:32.860 don't
02:49:32.980 know
02:49:33.120 how
02:49:33.620 probably
02:49:34.380 I
02:49:34.700 don't
02:49:34.820 know
02:49:35.000 how
02:49:35.440 I
02:49:36.180 didn't
02:49:37.160 see
02:49:37.360 these
02:49:37.620 things
02:49:38.020 at
02:49:38.860 the
02:49:38.980 time
02:49:39.360 it's
02:49:40.220 like
02:49:40.300 a
02:49:40.400 spiritual
02:49:40.660 blindness
02:49:41.080 man
02:49:41.380 like
02:49:41.560 like
02:49:41.800 scales
02:49:42.180 over
02:49:42.380 the
02:49:42.520 eyes
02:49:42.740 kind
02:49:42.900 of
02:49:42.980 a
02:49:43.080 thing
02:49:43.300 but
02:49:44.300 you know
02:49:47.920 Nephilim
02:49:48.220 death 0.97
02:49:48.460 squad 0.99
02:49:48.840 the aim
02:49:49.560 wasn't
02:49:49.800 so
02:49:50.040 good
02:49:50.820 in the
02:49:51.020 beginning
02:49:51.360 I
02:49:52.460 mean
02:49:52.620 so
02:49:52.800 true
02:49:53.120 at
02:49:53.300 least
02:49:53.480 you
02:49:53.600 know
02:49:53.660 what
02:49:53.740 I
02:49:53.780 mean
02:49:53.920 like
02:49:54.300 we
02:49:54.400 were
02:49:54.540 aimed
02:49:54.820 but
02:49:54.960 we
02:49:55.100 weren't
02:49:55.340 laser
02:49:55.780 focused
02:49:56.140 in
02:49:56.340 now
02:49:56.580 it's
02:49:56.760 different
02:49:57.040 I
02:49:57.660 think
02:50:02.400 yeah
02:50:02.860 you
02:50:03.020 can't
02:50:03.300 do
02:50:03.500 you
02:50:03.960 can't
02:50:04.180 do
02:50:04.280 a lot
02:50:04.500 of
02:50:04.560 what
02:50:04.660 we're
02:50:04.820 doing
02:50:05.020 without
02:50:05.380 the
02:50:06.280 initial
02:50:06.560 story
02:50:07.000 but
02:50:07.280 it's
02:50:07.400 the
02:50:07.480 same
02:50:07.620 thing
02:50:07.800 for
02:50:07.940 your
02:50:08.120 story
02:50:08.460 right
02:50:09.460 yeah
02:50:09.940 would
02:50:10.740 you
02:50:10.840 change
02:50:11.080 anything
02:50:11.380 no
02:50:12.220 nothing
02:50:14.000 so
02:50:17.760 you know
02:50:20.100 I
02:50:20.300 want to
02:50:20.740 make this
02:50:21.040 book man
02:50:21.540 and I
02:50:21.840 and I
02:50:22.120 want it
02:50:22.420 to just
02:50:22.700 be
02:50:22.920 this
02:50:23.300 these
02:50:24.340 stories
02:50:24.980 they're
02:50:26.020 hyper
02:50:26.260 relatable
02:50:26.660 I'm
02:50:27.700 not
02:50:27.840 telling
02:50:28.040 anybody
02:50:28.400 something
02:50:28.740 that
02:50:29.120 half
02:50:29.520 the
02:50:29.660 people
02:50:29.860 in
02:50:30.020 the 1.00
02:50:30.140 fucking 1.00
02:50:30.360 chat 1.00
02:50:30.680 are
02:50:30.860 going
02:50:31.060 off
02:50:31.280 on
02:50:31.400 their
02:50:31.520 own
02:50:31.680 experiences
02:50:32.400 and
02:50:34.340 and
02:50:36.520 the
02:50:36.660 fact
02:50:36.920 that
02:50:37.300 I
02:50:38.040 found
02:50:38.320 a
02:50:38.460 solution
02:50:38.860 like
02:50:39.160 the
02:50:39.320 door
02:50:39.560 might
02:50:40.000 have
02:50:40.100 been
02:50:40.220 opened
02:50:40.580 who
02:50:40.780 knows
02:50:41.080 any
02:50:41.220 number
02:50:41.480 of
02:50:41.640 ways
02:50:41.820 maybe
02:50:42.000 grandma
02:50:42.280 really
02:50:42.560 was
02:50:42.860 doing
02:50:43.240 some
02:50:44.020 Wiccan 1.00
02:50:44.340 shit 1.00
02:50:44.680 maybe 1.00
02:50:45.340 she
02:50:45.600 was
02:50:46.000 trying
02:50:46.480 to
02:50:46.720 find
02:50:47.000 a
02:50:47.160 solution
02:50:47.540 for
02:50:47.760 these
02:50:48.000 things
02:50:48.320 that
02:50:48.660 you
02:50:49.820 know
02:50:49.940 that
02:50:50.160 ailed
02:50:50.600 her
02:50:50.800 and
02:50:52.360 she
02:50:52.500 picked
02:50:52.700 the
02:50:52.820 wrong
02:50:53.020 thing
02:50:53.380 and
02:50:54.880 it's
02:50:57.720 like
02:50:57.840 man
02:50:58.160 since
02:50:59.300 focusing
02:50:59.720 on
02:50:59.980 Christ
02:51:00.340 it
02:51:01.740 has
02:51:01.900 become
02:51:02.540 as
02:51:05.640 potent
02:51:06.100 as
02:51:07.740 living
02:51:08.100 in a
02:51:08.340 house
02:51:08.560 full
02:51:08.740 of
02:51:08.900 nails
02:51:09.240 and
02:51:10.460 finally
02:51:10.900 having
02:51:11.240 a
02:51:11.420 hammer
02:51:11.700 testing
02:51:12.820 it out
02:51:13.160 a few
02:51:13.420 times
02:51:13.900 and
02:51:14.120 being like
02:51:14.400 oh yeah
02:51:15.000 this 1.00
02:51:15.280 fucking 1.00
02:51:15.560 works 0.99
02:51:15.860 dude
02:51:16.120 actually
02:51:16.720 this is
02:51:17.100 exactly
02:51:17.560 what
02:51:17.820 this is
02:51:18.140 meant
02:51:18.320 for
02:51:18.600 it's
02:51:19.540 not
02:51:19.720 just
02:51:19.940 that
02:51:20.060 it
02:51:20.180 works
02:51:20.400 you
02:51:20.520 could
02:51:20.640 do
02:51:20.780 it
02:51:20.900 with
02:51:21.040 a
02:51:21.180 wrench
02:51:21.420 if
02:51:21.580 you
02:51:21.680 line
02:51:22.440 it
02:51:22.560 up
02:51:22.700 right
02:51:22.900 enough
02:51:23.200 you
02:51:23.320 know
02:51:23.500 but
02:51:24.220 like
02:51:24.420 no
02:51:24.640 dude
02:51:24.960 this
02:51:25.740 is
02:51:25.880 a
02:51:26.060 hammer
02:51:26.360 and
02:51:27.340 it's
02:51:27.520 exactly
02:51:27.920 meant
02:51:28.280 for
02:51:28.460 this
02:51:30.340 I want
02:51:30.680 people
02:51:30.960 to
02:51:31.260 hear
02:51:31.720 this
02:51:31.960 or
02:51:32.080 to
02:51:32.280 read
02:51:32.900 this
02:51:33.160 book
02:51:33.520 and
02:51:34.440 to
02:51:34.620 know
02:51:34.920 that
02:51:35.480 actually
02:51:37.440 the
02:51:37.720 answer
02:51:38.460 for
02:51:38.660 these
02:51:38.860 things
02:51:39.140 is
02:51:39.520 much
02:51:40.480 simpler
02:51:41.540 than
02:51:42.440 maybe
02:51:42.640 you
02:51:42.780 even
02:51:43.000 thought
02:51:43.300 and
02:51:44.320 you
02:51:44.760 know
02:51:44.880 it
02:51:45.020 would
02:51:45.180 have
02:51:45.260 been
02:51:45.400 nice
02:51:45.760 and
02:51:46.220 I'm
02:51:46.360 sure
02:51:46.480 she
02:51:46.660 does
02:51:46.880 know
02:51:47.400 for
02:51:48.760 Barbara
02:51:49.120 to
02:51:49.440 know
02:52:00.340 again
02:52:01.580 the
02:52:03.080 end
02:52:03.380 is
02:52:03.600 written
02:52:04.080 in
02:52:04.960 the
02:52:05.460 book
02:52:06.220 in
02:52:07.160 the
02:52:07.720 pages
02:52:08.400 they
02:52:09.200 foresaw
02:52:10.800 when the
02:52:34.180 last
02:52:34.620 trumpet
02:52:34.980 sounds
02:52:35.680 and the
02:52:36.760 heaven
02:52:37.020 is
02:52:38.240 better
02:52:39.420 than
02:52:39.980 I
02:52:41.160 have
02:52:41.400 you